Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative....

Hmmm this Chronicle was like taking a walk down memory lane for me......

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

PARENTAL BONDAGE

Hello Stella,

Please I need your advice and those of fellow bvs and please forgive my epistle. 

Stella ever since I was little I've lived a sheltered life. My parents never allow us to visit or go anywhere that is not church or relatives. We are always indoors and it's affected my ability to socialize and keep friends. 

It's bad even to the extent that in the uni I rarely socialized, it was like a phobia and even my emotional maturity is in check. My ex was introduced to me through church and when I finally started loving the guy, due to some church ish between both families he suddenly wasn't good enough for my parents. I fought to keep the relationship but at the end I gave in to them. 

Now I've finished school and just recently started a small job that takes up even my weekends tho still living with my parents. Men are after me but get tired thinking I'm forming busy.  

Stella I'm very pretty but im so shy and lack this confidence to relate with people and all. Now I'm 26 and my parents are disturbing me everytime about marriage. My mum has turned it into a prayer point. Stella I no dey hear word on top marriage matter. 

These are the same people that wanted to kill me 2years ago because I attended my own birthday party a serious guy begged to throw for me. I still shudder from the embarrassment from that day. Stella leave!

The issue is now I'm trying to make up time to go out with the guys that r interested in me on Sundays by which I must be back home by 9pm in order to break this cycle of house+work+church cus If we(siblings) r not indoors it's church. We r not allowed to sleep outside at all cus according to my parents it can only mean hotels and clubbing. To hangout after work nko na wahala. 

My sis and I once were delayed at the salon and got home past 9 and this man started calling and raining abuses on us on phone and by the time we got home he had locked the gate. My mum had to later open it for us. Now my dad starts cussing me out that I want to turn into a prostitute that men take to hotels to rubbish on sundays. He has forbidden us from staying out overnight be it parties or whatever and now no more Sunday evening outings or the next time he will throw me out of his house etc. 

Did I mention I work every other day? 

How am I supposed to live in this situation? I feel so stifled. Their intentions may be good but is this the way? Am i asking for to much to just go out once in a while? Not even clubs oh, just hangouts? Would have moved out but not financially buoyant enough to stay on my own. We(siblings and I) have tried to reason with them but no way.

 I dont understand this their reasoning and have never given them cause for doubt before. Im not a rebellious person else this would have been another story. Is anybody going thru such and how did they cope? 

Is this normal? 

How long will they keep controlling? Is my existence just to please my parents and do their bidding ALWAYS? And this immense pressure to settle down will the hubby fly down from heaven into the house? I just tire. 

Am I even ready to escape this bondage and jump into marriage? 

Please I need your thoughts and advice and that of fellow bvs on how to proceed Stella cus i am ready to bone them and prepare for the consequences. Thanks.

WOW,My dad was exactly like yours but it was all through my life until i entered University where i started fighting back..the lion in me came out no one believed that the shy,naive and respectful girl i was could fight.My rebellion earned me lots of cane and lock out,i USED TO SLEEP at the gate when i missed my dead line to return home.

I used to have cane marks all over me the next day and would hide indoors from shame but it was only rebellion that freed me from the parental bondage.

I dont want to advice you to fight back but since you have tried all and nothing worked,try to have small dates during your lunch break and explain to your date what you are going through.....Go out on Sundays but return early and explain you are out looking for a husband for them..LOL

You will ultimately need to move out my dear..you are old enough..it is even only back home you see kids your age still at home,abroad,once you are adult (18)parents encourage you to move out/on.

Please do not be rude or have any verbal altercation in your quest to be free.

Good luck.