This is what i call XXL ish!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
MARRIED TO A DIFFICULT SPOUSE!
Good day Stella nwanyi oma.
Please kindly post this in the chronicles of Bv because I want to know what the bvs think about my situation and the advice they will give me.
The first time i posted my story some people insulted me that my husband married me because I was pregnant and it wasn't true at all because I put to bed 1 year after my traditional wedding. Some of the advice I got from my previous mail was really helpful and I'm here again with another one.
Please kindly post this in the chronicles of Bv because I want to know what the bvs think about my situation and the advice they will give me.
The first time i posted my story some people insulted me that my husband married me because I was pregnant and it wasn't true at all because I put to bed 1 year after my traditional wedding. Some of the advice I got from my previous mail was really helpful and I'm here again with another one.
Its long but please read so that you can advice me well and and please I'm not trying to paint him black,everything I have written down is the truth because so many people said that I painted him black when I sent the previous mail,thanks...
Please I need help on how to handle the kind of man I married. I have tried everything I can as a human being but its not just working, I have prayed and fasted but for where?. He is the kind of man that doesn't count other people's opinion as anything,he does what pleases him and he keeps making mistake all the time and yet he wont learn.
Things are very rough for us right now and he is venting his anger on me like say na me cause am.
He just doesn't want to work,before he told me that he can't do a job that is less than 50k and I have seen so many vacancies on this blog and I have called and mailed many of them but once I tell him about the job he will start laughing at me,can you imagine that?. He prefers to run errands for small boys where they will pay him 5h or 1k, I am so frustrated right now I swear.
Ever since I married him he doesn't care if his children and I are naked or not, This Xmas period so many people bought things for their children and he is not even moved at all, if I don't buy he won't bother buying or even give me money to buy,i have been buying things for us from my 25k security salary, the worst part is that he even expects me to buy clothes for him too but I don't do that. I have to buy for my kids because my daughter has been singing buy Christmas clothes for me since.
I have been feeling feverish since last week and I went to see a Dr on Saturday, I told my husband that I had fever and ever since then he hasn't even asked me how I'm feeling and when I asked him about that he asked me if he is a Dr that cares for sick people.
Whenever I complain about his treatment towards me he will say ''its not that I don't know how to treat a woman oo its just that there is no money now''
So people who are poor are not meant to be happy? Am I supposed to be this unhappy until he starts making millions? Can't I be happy because I'm poor???
I am only writing this mail to get help because I AM TIRED OF HIM and the marriage,sometimes I feel like poisoning him but I no get that kind liver jare, he is not making any effort to make things better. I have been enduring all these because of my children and I think its high time I left.
I am only writing this mail to get help because I AM TIRED OF HIM and the marriage,sometimes I feel like poisoning him but I no get that kind liver jare, he is not making any effort to make things better. I have been enduring all these because of my children and I think its high time I left.
You can't come to my house on weekends and meet him at home,he hardly spends time with us,he goes to play ball and once he comes back he will take his bathe,eat and leave again till like 9/10 pm and sometimes 11pm and once he comes back he will start touching me up and down,if I tell him that I'm tired he would keep malice with me for days,its only on bed that he recognizes me as his wife.
I am just 29+ but I look like 39 because of the stress I go through everyday, thinking wan finish me for here,make una help me abeg ooo.
I thank God that I am a strong woman if not I would've committed suicide long time ago but he is breaking me seriously,he is really pushing me.
I called his elder sister this week and she promised to talk to him.
I don't sleep up to 4 hours everyday because I have to wake up 4:20 everyday to prepare food for my kids and prepare for work too and when I complain of body pains and headache he will tell me that I should stop seeing it as a stress that its an exercise.(Which kind exercise be that biko nu)
Please kindly advice me on what to do,should I stay and endure everything he does to me because of my kids or should take a walk??
Thanks and God bless you.
JESUS CHRIST!....
If i ask you to stay or leave,would i be giving you good or bad advice?....My dear,your chronicles is better compared to a one chance marriage,abeg i cannot deal.
You wear the shoes and should know where it hurts most....Maybe you should just leave him for a while so that when hunger catches him,his brain will reset cos it looks like you are the one that feeds him.
It is so annoying to be married to the kind of man you have described.
Your Chronicles is traumatising but please make this decision by yourself.
I pray you have the strength to make up your mind and i pray God sees you through.
Na wah!
..........................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
HUSBAND MOVING INTO WIFES HOUSE AFTER WEDDING...
Hello Stellastica,complements of the season...my cousin will be going to Enugu this month to do native rights for his wife to be,she has a goof job with an oil and gas firm and he(my cousin) is claiming to be a real estate agent...guy is hustling big time in this Lagos after yahoo failed him.The problem now is we even think the babe is older than him but he claims otherwise...she's been married before and from what I've seen she's a really nice person and a Christian too.
She's way richer than my cousin and that bothers me,seen how lazy most Nigerian young men this days I'm worried for her, I called my cousin over to mine sometime ago and I pleased with him to let her go if he doesn't love her cos even a blind man would see that he's there cos she is financially okay...he claims he loves her, but I think he's marrying her out of pity and what he stands to gain in d marriage.The one that killed me was when I found out he was going to move into her house next year after d wedding(Stella, I screamers) I have never heard of such before,she bought a house last year and moved in with her sisters and now she wan marry man carry the man come her house.
I've begged my cousin to let this woman be but he dey go pay bride price on the30th of Jan... She doesn't even know him,he pretends around her to make it look like he goes out everyday to hustle but she is blinded by getting married.... I dont know if it's a norm this days for men to move in with their wives in Naija...My husband thinks its very wrong, do you think I should discuss with his sisters or just let the so called wife enter one chance. Stella use your red pen or blue abeg....
I read this and i laughed,you shouldnt be worried for the lady,its your cousin you should be worried for..No woman is stupid,if he messes up,she throws him out and he starts from square one.If he movies in,he will change her status and give her a child if he can,ultimately,its your cousin who has everything to loose so worry for him..LOL.
hmmmm
ReplyDeleteJoblesshousewife
Yet another marriage issue Jesus fix it.
DeleteKai,jhw I too love you ooooo, poster2-just negodu o. Poster1-d Lord is ur muscle
DeletePoster 1, as bad as ur situation is, I see no reason for u to leave. You've not mentioned DV or adultery, so inasmuch as it's not a life-threatening situation, you have to stay and bear ur cross.
DeleteMost of the problems we encounter in relationships are linked to expectations. When we expect too much, we're bound to be disappointed. The truth is that your husband should provide for his family, the reality is something else. That's why it's important to be very certain about these fundamental things before taking the leap!
There are no biblical grounds for divorce here, so keep doing what you're doing, expect nothing from him, and above all PRAY for God's intervention. Don't look to your husband for provision, don't nag or fret, find joy in your kids and other activities. Thank God you have a job. It'll be difficult, but I believe change will come.
Nothing is impossible when you believe!
NkI, i beg to differ. She doesn't have to stay and bear any cross. I hate lazy men with a passion. DV and adultery are not the only things that can frustrate a person out of a marriage. Assuming that everything she has written is the truth, her husband's negligence and laziness is likely more of a burden on her than if he were cheating
DeleteP1.jst assume u are d husband,and he is d housewife(if u choose to stay)ignore him on focus on ur job and children. D only thing u stand to miss is Sex. If u leave u going to av peace of mind(dats if u are not bothered abt sex). And wen u av peace of mind,it goes a long way. Also meditate on wat to do to improve ur monthly earnings as u be d bread and butter winner.
DeleteP2. Mind ur business, alara ni ara o ro ohun, oni o ku aisun(person talk say body no pain am,u talk say make I'm sorry ow body)wetin concern u. My friend oya reverse and adjust and maintain ur lane.
Lol @ I see nothing wrong with a man with no shame...Poster 2, buy a mew sim, and send her a message.
DeleteLazy men chronicles. Lmao.
DeletePoster one, Gather strength and leave him temporary. He's not kukuma helping financially or any kind of "ally"
DeleteSee errors in second Chronicles.
Shebi she's not a mumu, let her just not go and give him bank details and all.
Nmasinachi I also thought of that o.
DeleteIt's well.
ReplyDeleteBrb.
******LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*****
P1. Reduce the anger in u, call him and have a long heart to heart talk with him. His problem(s) can't be solved in a day cos it need a long term plan and he must have lost ideas on what to do to bring him money. Tell him that he need to reduce his drinking, ego, swallow his pride, meet wealthy church members, family, friends and friends' dad and tell them to connect him to any good job. Or he should always apply for job vacancies online anyhow till God decide to bless him.
DeleteHe can also learn the following trades: Welding, Fabrication, Brick Laying, House wiring, Auto Diagnostics/Mechanic, Auto Electrician, Tiler, Printing, Generator Engineering, Driving. Alumaco, Shoe Designers, Estate Agency, etc.
P2: That guy go hear wien when the woman don tire to dey spoon-feed am. Tell him any guy that depends COMPLETELY on his woman's finance is under a spell. Men are born to hustle hard, make money, spend it on his wife, children, parents, siblings, friends, church etc and be financially independent. Women were created to support
All you people that will be saying sit him down and talk to him. Nor be person wet get ear go listen? If your various boyfriends nor buy you nothing, una go dey carry face dey make mouth and you are here saying trash about marriage. My dear the decision rests finally with you but ask yourself these questions, your kids are young and you have a long way to go especially with school fees and stuff. Can you continue like this 10 years down the line??? My father didn't work for a while oo. In short for 10 years but we didn't feel anything cos he struggled combined with my mum shouldering the responsibilities. Granted, he trained her in schillings but still he was everywhere doing any little work he could find. Today am proud of them all as he has financed 4 of us till phd abroad and has 3 more to go. Just pray very hard but I really do wish you well
DeleteIkorita just negodu
ReplyDeleteP1 only you know where the shoe pinches so make your choice but can I ask you must your happiness come from a man? Can you gave your life, children and career? Just asking
DeleteP2 can you Just Negodu on this matter?
Face*
DeleteChronicles....
ReplyDeletePoster 2 gold digging things.
DeleteIt's well.
ReplyDeleteBrb.
******LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*****
Poster1, u re married to urself, try as much as possible to save to start up a trade, forget horseband, and plssssssss stop making babies.
DeletePoster2, oya call d woman and tell her nau.
Hmmmm nawa o ife ne mekwa!
ReplyDeleteNigerian men turning their wives to breadwinner since 2000. Rubbish!!!!
DeletePoster2 is about to become 1,poster 1 is already 1. Cant deal!
Let me read and come back. Surely it will be about relationship issues once again..... God help us
ReplyDelete@1, marriage is for better for worse so endure, u married women complain too much, did u not know he was stubborn before u married him, abeg comot here make I c road.
ReplyDelete@2, I pray she turns ur useless, lazy cousins into a pant washer, lazy men everywhere.
Stupid Angelray
DeleteYou've crossed your boundary on this blog... I will show you pepper so you can learn how to mind your own business and not insult people's predicament anyhow
Exactly. Did she (poster 1)
Deletenot see any signs during courtship? Except the guy was pretending very well!
I wanted to ask same
Deletemadam,is it that he was hardworking before and he lost his job? Or he has been jobless and you just married him like that?
Exactly my thoughts...in her mind"i go change am"..oya go ask APC for Change
DeletePoster 1,you write extremely well for a security guard. What is happening in this nation? Look at someone like this doing security job of 25k.i feel so sad for you darling. Especially when I got to where you asked if you cant be happy cos you're poor. I almost shed a tear. All will be well in God's own time. Some Nigerian men are just the silliest species in the world.
ReplyDeleteBe strong sweetie
Walahi
DeletePoster two leave him naa...no be toke house maje dey live?..lol..dunno o!
ReplyDeletePoster one u sound like u had no choice but to marry ur husband.
If u r fed up go naa!
Hian!
Chei that Toke lady is all shades of wrong. Definitely all nah wash. And he still went out and had a baby on her
DeleteToday's Chronicles just get as e b, I no even know wetin to write fa.
ReplyDeleteJesus is Lord.
Poster 2 mind your business
ReplyDeletePoster 1 -mind your business
Poster 1: I was thinking that after all the bashing by now ud have moved out.Yes, marriage is good but with the right mindset not with a lazy bum as a hubby.Please enough of the repeated chronicles, leave d man and look for a means to take care of ur kids.This isn't marriage, u shudnt be saving face and dying while he's going out n having fun.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: u r a good woman but leave d woman to learn her lesson.She isn't blind,n just like most of us here, we see the signs and still force ourselves to answer mrs.Since ur cousin is claiming love it's a matter of time bfor he cheats on iyawo and steals her cash bfor she kicks him outta the house.Dont put ur mouth or she will say u don't want her to get married yet u r.
Poster one..
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry dear but there's something about your story that's making me laugh here. Like "what type of exercise is that biko nu?" lol
Nyways o nnem chukwu gbaa gi ume. Marriage is a gamble, each and everyone of us have our different issues to deal with. God help you deal with yours..
Poster two..
I can't stop laughing for this ya chronicle o lol. Why are you so worried for this babe? Abeg free the guy joor..
Maybe they truly, truly love each other.. You never know. Let the be biko lol
Just negodu
ReplyDeletePoster one d lord is ur muscle
ReplyDeletePoster two allow ur cousin to be oooo(I believe he is man enough to take decisions on his own)
Chronicles la hot...
ReplyDeletePoster 2 i have few words here. Leave the woman alone! Don't tell her nada. If she's too stupid to see the trap ahead then free her. Her chronicle is loading.
ReplyDeleteThat's why they end up enduring all sorts of bs in a bid to answer Mrs.
Stella did you say no woman is stupid? Stupid women abound. Infact, very stupid ones can be found in this part of the earth.
ReplyDeleteU talk too much
DeleteAww mama wanderer, any lip movement in sight? Gerrarahia.
DeleteLol mama wonder, you miss road? dey ya lane o.
DeleteXoxo pls ignore the cow.
Xoxo mystery,u won't understand how much of a talkative he is,I aint going anywhere.
DeleteCome here,who be cow? U look more like a cow. Yeye dey smell.
Happy holidays!!!
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2: WHEN WHEN ARE HUNGRY TO MARRY THEM BECOME BLIND.
ReplyDeletePLEASE ALERT HER IMMEDIATELY!!
YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE LIKES HE HAS SPUN TO BLOCK HER SENSÉS. ALERT HER IMMEDIATELY, EVEN IF VIA ANONYMOUS TEXT.
LET HER BLOOD NOT BE ON YOUR HANDS. IF YOU WERE IN HER SHOPS WOULD YOU ALSO WANT TO ENTER BONDAGE WILLINGLY?
Poster one your cse is really tough but I won't advice you to laeve cuz marriage is for better or worse, just ignore him and take care of yourself and kids
ReplyDeleteScary end time chronicles. So scary.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, God will surely comfort you. Teary eyez....
Poster 1:
ReplyDeleteI believe you had river blindness when you married this man. Or was it only when he said 'I do' that he manifested this madness?
If he can't treat you well, when he is poor, (and you know poor men are always humble and speak plenty grammar) is it when e don hammer that he will have your time?
By then you will be old stock na, and he will go for brand new chassis.
chronicles! Chronicles!!
ReplyDeletePoster 1. I feel for you oh. how u take dey manage 25k take dey run home plus chop plus children sch fees including house rent. the lord is your muscle.
ReplyDeletePoster 2. mind youe business oh. You think the lady doesn't know that your bro enweghi ihe ochi?
she knows what she's doing.
Intresting chronicles,poster 1,I wld add to stella's advice,u write well,meaning ur English is sound,I wld love it if u can get another job that pays better,so that u can care for ur kids better,bcos in d long run,25k will not be enough,left to me,I cnt live with such husband,I will move out for smtym make hunger wire am well. Even d Holy Bible talk am say ' a man that can't provide for his home is worst than an infidel' I HATE such men that act reali irresponsible. Pray too,its possible his village people are drumming and following him. Lol.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, dnt wori abt ur cousin,he has made his bed,let him lie on it,kapish!
Get another job,where you see job
Delete#1..for richer for poorer,in sickness n in health till death do u part"..dats d vow u made
ReplyDelete#2..ur cousin na craze man n he's plotting his own downfall..he for allow d lady come pay groom price.u think a lady will help u n not later rub it in ur face wen u have a little issue wit her?maybe not all sha but 90% of dem...No matter how rich my wife is(she will be ijn),I will be d man in d house n take all d responsibilities expected of a man,in Jesus name I pray.Amen.
Amen to you prayer bro. No matter how rich I am,God will continue to make my husband the MAN in my home.
DeleteThis ish is causing a lot of havoc in one of my friend's house. No strength to type d whole story now,brb.
Poster 1: do you need God to come down and tell you this marriage is not working out? Pls do the needful biko..your life comes first before any man
ReplyDeletePoster 2: why are you so worried about this matter?..hope you do not have some hidden agendas? Just kidding! LOL..just say your mind and keep watching
Hmmmm poster1...........as aunty stella just said I. Think u should make d. Decision ursef nd always remember to pray,dnt relent#jesuswill fix it for u ok
ReplyDeletePoster2...........dah ur cousin sha,na him go suffer am oooo
Narrative 1, your husband has really hurt you and I can read that in the tone of your narrative. You have become a very bitter woman. I'll say this to you: in spite all our wrongs, God still loves us- that is grace. Your husband may have a long list of things he does wrong but God still loves him... and you should love him too. Don't give up on your marriage yet. Stop trying to change the man. Men hate when a woman keeps trying to change him. Fight on your knees- pray persistently. Scripture can not be broken and it says the effectual fervent prayer of the righteous man has great power in its effects. Have a prayer journal and write down what you want God to do for your marriage and pray accordingly everyday. It works!
ReplyDeleteAgain, your happiness should not be dependent on how he treats you. Your happiness should from God. Even if he gives you no money, buys no clothes, verbally abuses you, don't lose your piece. Be filled with joy because there are just too many things to be thankful for. You will be teaching your kids to do same.
Fight on your knees. I will say it again: fight on your knees! A nagging wife is one of the most disturbing things a man can have- Proverbs 21:19. I say this because you can easily be moved to nagging, considering what he does to you. Be calm and speak more to God and focus on what God can do about the situation. Spend the energy used in venting to pray. Because yes, God can make your marriage sweeter than you can ever imagine.
Precious Core Blog
Pray pray like say prayer na beans.4get you fit pray pray dis year God go come answer next 7years sef
DeleteMake I read comments, because if I dare make comment eh, it won't go well. What is this marriage issue turning into. Smh
ReplyDeletep 1: marriage is for better for worse. you have not done enough to make him change to ya taste. try harder. encourage him to learn a skill, that way he will make money for the family.
ReplyDeletep2: so because the lady is rich that's why you are worried. let the guy man take his chance. marriage is a gamble. let him take the chance. after all somebody married a billionaire old enough to be his grandfather and she termed it LOVE. Hmmmm. pray for their marriage. As for him moving in with her. there is nothing wrong with it.
this life.
Make she cut her bottom join to make the marriage harder.special adviser on ezeule matters
DeletePOSTER 2: FROM YOUR NARRATION, THIS GUY HAS SINISTER PLANS WHICH MIGHT INCLUDE MURDERING THIS LADY TO CLAIM HER BELONGINGS just like Stella suggested. Do whatever will give you peace of mind and clear conscience. We were taught to love our neighbors as ourselves. This is your fellow woman about to lose everything she ever worked for including her life. Send your warning and free your conscience.
ReplyDeleteU too watch Afmag, msheww. Poster2, face ur home. Aproko! Dem call u for their matter? So ur family isn't enough for u to face? Toju bo le syndrome.
DeleteNot all lazy men are killers. Pls change your tv station from Afmag at regular intervals. Watch CNN
DeleteA man moving into a woman's hus?as his wife?hmmmm na wa.wat a shame.
ReplyDeleteI remember poster one's first chronicle
ReplyDeleteIs this marriage thing by force. People wey never eat 3square meals you want to marry. Poster 1,your first major mistake is marrying a jobless man. Who does dat? An unemployed man shdnt even be referred to as smone's husband. He's not worth that name husband. I don't know how ppl do it o,but even while single broke men don't know my address, they don't even know my name. Man never fit see money for my hand sef. Not to talk of me feeding you. Not to say we don't have young hardworking men that are just starting work, or building a businesss. But you must see prospect before marryoing someone. He must have a job, and a comfortable roof over his head. Feeding shouldn't be a problem to him. You don enter dis one since you have kids. Just keep bearing it. If I were you, he wont see shishi of my money. Just keep looking after urself and ur kids.
ReplyDeleteAm not your fan but I like this your comment!...
DeletePoster 1: just ignore the man. That's all. Let me ask, where do u get money to cook for him? From your 25k salary I guess? U r still petting him my dear.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: let the guy enter the marriage. He thinks he's going to enjoy but doesn't understand that once that woman get a child or children, she'll throw him out. Just watch
If he plays his card wella,she won't throw him out!..
DeletePoster1...I remember ur last chronicles u sent in..and u still complained of d same thing...even if dis ur husband touch money his character will always be d same...u saw all these before u married him but u thot marriage was going to change...well how u lay ur bed so u lie on it.
ReplyDeletePoster2....jus negodu dat ur cousin...na jigolo e be..houseboy work loading
poster one, you are not in a marriage. i hate lazy men. that man you married wont change. he wants to get rich but hes not willing to put in an effort. and since youre so miserable, dont have any more kids with him since feeding the ones you people have now i a problem. i cant imgaine being 29 and going through all that. id take my kids and leave. as long as you have somewhere to go and family to accomodate you, leave him. maybe that would even make him wake up
ReplyDeleteposter two your cousin is equally lazy. why are the chronicles today just about lazy men??!!! i feel so sorry for that woman. stella is wrong o.that lady wants to marry so she will take anything just to answer mrs somebody. your cousin will just take her money and leave her for someone else
Trinity I disagree!...
DeleteMarriage is for better and for worse!...
This is her worse and she should endure it...
Her husband is not a bad man just that he is lazy abi?...
She should look for a boyfriend biko..
And you're back!!!!
DeleteHmm if she has to get a boyfriend it has to be a rich one. I can't imagine being just 29 and be suffering in my husband's house like that
I weep for some men... and I wonder how the Hell women fall into their Traps
ReplyDeletePoster 2, as somebody wey marry man enter house Stella no dey lie. If he mess up I go carry hin load throway. As long as the wife is not stupid enough to change the deed of the house. All the pretending your cousin is doing is the same thing my husband did before we married. Now i'm beating him at his own game. I don clear my account for america, take money buy correct land in lagos in my maiden name (which I never changed to begin with). Who be mumu? If the cousin's wife was stupid she would not have been able to amass the wealth you speak of. The guy na sperm donor, just like my husband :)
ReplyDeleteThen why get married? Is it by force? You're still bearing your maiden name as a married woman. What values about marriage would you want to teach your children? If you want kids you can adopt or else trust God to give you the bone of your bones so that you can have your own children. This is what happens when we use human wisdom, it is absolute foolishness to God.
DeletePoster 1- I remembered your 1st Chronicle.
ReplyDeleteAll I see is just complain upon complain. Your husband sounds good just that no money to spoil you a little. He's behaving like that because he married a hardworking woman who keeps feeding him despite his inability to secure a job. In short, over-proud dey worry him.
This is what you get when you feed a lazy man, and it appears he knows your weakness so try know his and use it properly stop the complain and make him realise that you can't be carrying his responsibilities all times.
Well, I believe there may be someone he listens to, get that person involve so that he'll take up even if its a driving job. Keep faith and trust God.
Poster 2- Your c-bros needs deliverance. He thought marriage is sweet-mouth. How long will he continue dribbling/deceiving himself?
Exactly for poster 1...
DeleteThat's why I don't like women acting miss independent to their men...
They are both in for a shocker.
ReplyDeleteNone pls leave that marriage
ReplyDeletePoster2 na God butter ur cousin bread, pls let him enjoy
Leave gini?...
DeleteToday chronicles tire me, maybe becos I've been studying all day and my brain doesn't want to coordinate for anything else.... Poster 1 & 2, it is well...
ReplyDeletePoster 1,try all u can to forget u have a hubby and be happy,manage the little u have and live within your means. The Lord will upgrade u
ReplyDeleteOnly a man who has no shame like u rightly pointed out will move in with a woman,a pretentious one at that!
ReplyDeletePoster 1,
ReplyDeleteDon't leave your marriage oh!...
Get a rich boyfriend that will be helping you out...
Majority of those telling you to leave your marriage are the bread winners in their homes...
Your children need their father but please,stop giving him ortu!...no more having kids aswell...
Stop complaining...marriage is like a bale of second hand cloths...ife itotaru,I welu!...
Am sure with time,your husband will grow up!...
Poster 2,
Abeg free your cousin...
Mugu fall guy man chop!...
You actually made small sense today.
DeletePoster 1, I understand how you feel and I feel so sorry for you. Men could sometimes be a pain in the ass. I would advice you to move closer to God. Let your spiritual fire burn the more. And try to start a business that you know will move fast or get a better paying job, so that you can take care of your kids. And please use contraceptives. Get educated on how you can avoid getting pregnant. Your kids should be your priority and your joy. And for your husband, tell a trusted member of his family to talk to him and keep praying for him in faith or when you find a vacancy for him, let someone he will answer tell him instead of you, because you said he won't answer you. I wish you all the best. The Lord is your strength.
ReplyDeleteSee ehn poster 2...I think you should leave the woman since she's stupid enough.Like joke like joke she will marry 3rd husband.I mean,who moves into a womans house if he isn't a low life?Marriage is not the ultimate oh aunty,I'd rather she just born rather than been the husband in her own marriage that I'm sure she's finance 85%...this thing happened to my elder sister, she's back home now.
ReplyDeleteNo 2 plz u should pity for ur bro, won't he b ashame staying with d wife n her family, just as d lady doesn't know ur bro very well don't assume u know her well yet..
ReplyDeleteP0ster 1 why d0 I feel u are the kind 0f w0men dat wants t0 get married by all means. H0w can u be feeding a gr0wn up ass man wh0 d0esnt want t0 w0rk, a lazy man wh0 can't take care 0f his kids. H0w d hell did u agree t0 marry such a man? St0p feeding the f00l, st0p giving him pussy, st0p giving him m0ney f0r fuck sake. I guess u pay the rent t00? Wats wr0ng with w0men dis days? U already have kids t0 take care 0f why add a lazy f00l t0 the list. Leave him N0W d0nt say we dint warn y0u. Cheeers
ReplyDeletePoster 1. You could leave him for like a week with the kids just only so that he appreciates what you go through everyday and mean while keep praying for him and grace and strenght for yourself, there is nothing really that God cant do!
ReplyDeletePoster 2. Find a way to hint it to any member of the lady's family that will tell her, after that you have done your part and let them be, give them your blessings if they still decide to get married, who knows she might be equal to the task
Enter your comment...hmmm na wa o...aftre reading poster 1 chronicle, I need to commend my husband then, who has managed the house well and taken care of me nd our daughter with job of less than 40k. Am even on my knees daily that God should bless me with a job to support him ( I graduated last year), seeing his efforts(he makes sure we neva lack). He is even telling me he will get any other job that can bring in another income with the one he is doing...madam, your husband is lazy jare and I feel for you...just pray is all I can say. And don't get preggy again..our daughter is 1yr+, and we have decided to chill till things get better( we plan of having only two) let's just say we knew each other better(ambition and future plans) before we decided to enter dis marriage. And to the glory of God, our plan is working.
ReplyDeleteYour husband is like mine, only he earns 80k monthly. He takes veerrrry good care of us with his meager salary. My prayer everyday is that he gets a better paying job and I should get one too to support him.
DeleteYour husband is like mine, only he earns 80k monthly. He takes veerrrry good care of us with his meager salary. My prayer everyday is that he gets a better paying job and I should get one too to support him.
DeleteP1, its obvious he's frustrated. Just pray for him to break forth. P2, wetin your cousin deh find he go see.
ReplyDeleteMy dear sumtimes this thing can b foundational problem. I kn a couple dat d husband was a taxi driver and she was working in a church as a cleaner for several years. Wen d husband became blessed and got a driving job in off shore company earning almost eighty k. D wife was happy and ready to enjoy wit her three kids. Buh guess wat? Strange sickness attacked d man and he died. He only worked for a yr. As if dis woman will never enjoy marriage, worse of all became a widow at 37. I will say pray and ask for mercy. We cant get everything in life.
ReplyDeleteNarrator one if I didn't know well, i would have thought you are my brother's wife and that you were talking about my brother. The only thing missing in this story is that he doesn't beat you and your narrative was well composed.
ReplyDeleteIf i am to ask you, how did you meet this man? Was there wedding in the 1st place (proper wedding ceremony to hook the two of you together)? Did your family warned you and advised you agai st this man? Did hos family members, especially his siblings advised you?
Well i can't blame you for where you are now o. I don't even know what advice to give to you sef because I have just this same kind of person as a brother too. I guess this life is created in such a way that...for every kind of man, there is a woman to tag along. May God help you.
Poster one, Gather strength and leave him temporary. He's not kukuma helping financially or any kind of "ally"
ReplyDeleteSee errors in second Chronicles.
Shebi she's not a mumu, let her just not go and give him bank details and all.
Blood of God! Poster1; well I honestly feel it's not as ugly as u make it look.
DeleteYou can't be married to a man, have kids for him and not know how to get through to him;well,ma advice is thus;dialogue! Cos there is nothing that can't be solved through dialogue but if he refuses to man up,then for d interest of womanhood,you've gats to bend him hard enough to see reasons with you.above all,pray......
Mr Dialogue. Did you not read where she wrote that she has talked to him yet no improvement. You forget that it's hard to dialogue with a stubborn man.
DeleteMr Dialogue. Did you not read where she wrote that she has talked to him yet no improvement. You forget that it's hard to dialogue with a stubborn man.
DeleteQueen u like to advise people to look for boy friend if u don't mind ,borrow them yours small na ,after all what are we here for?
ReplyDeleteposter 1 is the security lady with sore in her thumb that requested for washing machine.I contacted her and she said everyone that promised her something failed,please let's try and reach out to her even if its to encourage her,am very sure she's the one.
Using stella's blog language.."JUST NEGODU" Bt ehhn poster one..hmmm complicated..
ReplyDeletePoster 1 - what is your qualification. You need to get a better job to maintain your home. Pray for him and ignore him.Wake him at night and Gove him ideas of what he can do. Report him to his people if he doesn't change and move out for a while to teach him a lesson if you are sure that won't backfire
ReplyDeletePoster 2 you just have to tell her o. Find a way. My sister is dealing with the aftermath of being married to a lazy greedy man and it's not nice at all.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 sorry o...your man is plain lazy...nothing anyone can do about it. Work harder and focus on your kids.
Poster 1. Don't mean to kick you when you're down. But I'm sure you're one of those who are insulting the likes of Anna Banner for being a single mother yet you're in a worse predicament. These days I don't pity some of you who have marital problems coz many of you are not sympathetic to your fellow women. Anyways, May the Holy Spirit guide you and show you what to do. Goodluck
ReplyDeleteIt is well...I always tell people don't let love be the major reason why u were married...we were made to love the person we marry...Poster 1 Pls pray to God to change him...@poster 2,u wan pour sand 4 my guy garri? The guy is in love with wealth...dön't try to talk him off bcos i sense his mind is made up
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, I have an aunt whose problem is much worse than yours, how she accepted it nd move on like its nothing still amazes me till today. She pumps money every year into hubbys account yet nothing to show for it. He never brings his money for anythin for d house even if its just matches for where?. Rather he eats d one my aunty brings home, she pays rent, food, school fees for her kid and d one d randy man got from outside,2 kids fees, fuel d gen. She does everything in d house with her money yet still lives with the horseband. D mans father died not quite long ago but he didn't travel claiming no money, my aunty gave him money o travel and bought things he can eat while in d village just NEGODU, my dear urs is better sef. He goes out comes bk by 9 -10 to his shop yet nothing to show for it. Some Men needs help just like ur hubby and my auntys hubby too. It is well dear Poster.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 i admire u cos ur a strong woman, sit down and take a decision that is best for u and the children. u r too young to go tru al dis.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 mind ur business leave her to find out
POSTER 1
ReplyDeletefollow your heart and Do what you feel is best for you, pray without having anything in your mind expecting God to do what he feel his best for you.