Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.

Hmmm....The proverbial rejected stone always shines in the end...

  NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE

THE REJECTED STONE..

I waited four years for admission into university. It was like something that would never come. It was like something that stood away from me. It was like something that felt disgusted by me. It was a dream and a nightmare. It was a dream because I knew it would come true. It was a nightmare because I had become a thing of shame and ridicule in my town. 

My father had given up on me. He refused to pay for my Jamb forms or help in any way to get admission. I was the only girl in the family and the least brilliant too. He hated that I didn’t do science and went for arts instead. I knew my powers were in writing and speaking, so, I had always wanted to be a lawyer.

My boyfriend of 3 years was the first guy I fell in love with and the only man that has ever eaten the cookies. You know. I met when I was 16. He started showing interests in me when I was 17. He toasted me for a whole year before I said yes. He was 19 and I was 18 when we started dating. Now, I’m 21. Nothing has changed since we started. At least with my own life. I still don’t have a degree to my name.

Towards the end of last year, I started noticing changes in his attitudes to me. He won’t pick or return my calls. One evening, he came to my house and said that we needed to talk. He told me he wanted to break up with me. He said we can’t get anywhere together that the relationship won’t lead anywhere. He was graduating and I’m yet to gain admission. He said his friends laugh at him that he was going to marry an illiterate girl. He goes to a private university. I have noticed it earlier myself. He has introduced me as his friend a couple of times among his friend but at that moment the picture got clearer. 

He wasn’t proud of me. When we hang out, his friends’ girlfriends talk about their schools and what’s happening in their schools and you see most times I just look because I don’t always have anything to contribute. Most of those girls too go to private universities and universities abroad. I know he loves me but it was just an issue of classism. We don’t belong to the same class. I accepted it in good faith.

When he broke up with me I didn’t shed a tear because I have cried all the times he had denied I was his girlfriend not because he wanted to cheat on me but because he wasn’t just proud of me. Before all these rubbish got into his head, he was the most supportive person in my life. He calls me every evening to encourage me and calls me at night to study. He drew my study plan and helps me with my deadlines. Yet, I failed and failed again. At the point, he broke up with me, there was nobody helping me again with my studies. I lived with my grandmother in my formative years and didn’t come back to Lagos until 14. So, it affected my education negatively, so, to avoid repeating further after repeating twice, I had to study twice as much as my classmates. You know the truth is sometimes, I don’t blame my boyfriend. 

My mum grumbles too. She is tired of me. She is tired of me not being able to help myself academically and she was the one who took me to her mum when things were difficult for the family financially. My Dad has two wives. The first wife has two boys. He sent her packing based on some cheating allegations. He married my mother after. My mother gave birth to three children – two boys and a girl. So, I’m the only girl in the family. Because of my academic problem, I just have a feeling nobody likes me in the family especially my Dad and my half-brothers.

The miracle happened this year. I passed all my exams and gained admission into the university to study law. The news spread like a wildfire. My Dad said I took after him that he was also brilliant when he was young but didn’t have the opportunity to go to the university. The funniest part is that my boyfriend wants me back after the heartbreak and trauma he put me through. He said he broke up with me due to peer pressure and he is ready to wait for me until I graduate before we get married. I don’t know if I should accept him back. He has been begging me for 4 months now. He said he has been in two relationships since we broke up but none worked for him. Although, I haven’t been in any relationship but there is a guy I like in school.

 I have forgiven him but I’m not sure I want to accept him back. Throughout my mess, he was the nicest person to me. I was thinking if I could accept my Dad back, why not my boyfriend? I have always wanted to be with my one guy until I get married and as a matter of principle, I believe it should be any guy I gave my flower but I like the new guy I just met in school too. I’m in a dilemma. Should I accept him back? A known devil is better than an unknown angel. If I may add, his family is way more financially buoyant than mine and his uncle has a law firm in Lagos. 

Besides that I still love him madly.  We all make mistakes. I don’t know what action to take. Any advice is welcomed. Stella, your red ink is really needed. BVs, forgive my long narrative.

Congrats to you babe.

Your father who birthed you rejected you and you forgave him,thats the biggest betrayal..but then blood is thicker than water.

Since your BF is sorry,take him back but watch him.Dating someone in school might be a distraction  and since you are not so brilliant and studying law,i dont think you need that right now oh.

Stick with the devil you know but watch him with side eyes.

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NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO

DATING A MALE VIRGIN

Stella, compliment of the season to you.... may this season bring good tidings to you and your family.I need bvs input on this one... 

How does a sexually active lady manage a relationship with a man that is a virgin? this guy is not sexually active while I have had sex before.. whats the best way around this? He is a good man all in all... 

I just need advice on how to not hurt him, do people actually start having sex and stop? If yes how do they do it? I know I can't do this alone and I might need someone to mentor me on how not to fall back or cheat on him cos he doesn't deserve it. 

I do like him.God bless you plenty.

Let me read comments...