When a couple wants to get Married,is it a must that the wedding must hold at the Ladies Church or at the man's church?
Or it doesnt matter where?
I hear the choice of where to wed is actually a big problem for most intending couples...huh?
Is there anywhere in the Bible where it is written or is this a man made?
Now read this.....
''Stella please I would like to ask this question because I was born and brought up in the North and presently I am in the South.
Yesterday I had an argument with some guys and they they said it is very wrong to wed in the girls church and that it is only done in the guys church and I was amazed because it was my very first time to hear such.
One even gave an example of his brother telling his wife that if they would not marry in his church (Hes Catholic while she is Pentecostal) he would not marry her.
Please I want to throw it to the house for us to discuss.''
Hers.
ReplyDeleteMy BFF left both his church and wife's church, and wedded his wife in a hired church.... we wed in any church o!
DeleteAm Catholic and I would love to have a Catholic wedding. After the wedding if he wants me to attend uka with him am ready. But you see that my wedding day, if he loves me he would we'd me in a Catholic church. My dad is even a knight so it's not possible I wed in a non Catholic church. He has started warning me sef.
DeleteHIS
DeleteThe guys church
Hers
DeleteSure it's mine
DeleteBae said it must be his church. Im catholic by birth, he is anglican.i have always wanted an anglican wedding (mum is anglican) cos i cant deal with catholic mass weddings, so i guess it works...added to the fact that i really cant be bothered.
Delete@ precious ibik exactly my predicament
Delete@precious, ur dad might change his mind when he sees you 'Gweging'
DeleteBy right I think it should be done in the "her" church and her church should be her family church . The man has to marry the girl and take her away to wherever he wants them to worship. But the wedding should be done in the girl's church, weda na Cele or Catholic or RCC
DeleteWherever is convinient for both of them.
ReplyDeleteI'll like to wed in my family church cos of my mum. But if our pepper rest well we will do it abroad.
Your pepper go soon rest wella. Make sure u invite me.
Delete*convenient
DeleteAmen. I'll surely invite you
DeleteUsually the lady's church
DeleteI've read/heard it that in Igbo's land, it's done in the groom's church. But in Yoruba's land, no bone of contention there, it's done @ the bride's Church.
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
Yea. In my place it's done in the brides church. But I'll do mine anywhere that is convenient for both of us.
DeleteDefinitely done at d brides familys church in yorubaland.
DeleteStarry larry, its not a written rule o.
Deletethey can wed anywhere. I am igbo and my sister's and cousins wedding were done in their churches.....not the grooms
I'm a Catholic, and if I'm getting married to a Catholic, I wouldn't have any problem with the choice of church to wed, but if I'm marrying a non Catholic, it'll have to be my church, else I wouldn't be allowed to receive communion in church again.
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval.
Smh @ Christian leaders.
DeleteAren't we all serving the same God?
Catholics with oriri
DeleteWell I think most times is the woman's church. I did my wedding in my dad's church (catholic) because my church where giving me too many protocol (MFM) , so I just jejely go my papa church go do am peacefully I nor fit shout.
DeleteThat's where Compromise comes in, it is "normal" in this part of the world to we'd in the girl's Church, "a man shall leave his Father's house ,..." after joining the wife they can both decide where to worship, most times the choice is usually the guy's church.
DeleteAbout communion and Compromise, my Friend an Anglican, married a Catholic whose brother is even a priest, they got Married Lavishly in her Church, did thanksgiving in the guy's, then they did "marriage blessing" in Catholic Church, they both receive communion now.
That's a lie. You would be allowed to take communion as long as the priest blesses that marriage. Their lots of Catholics married to different faith.
DeleteNot true.
DeleteMy sister married a catholic in our church ( Anglican) and her hubby still receives communion in his church.
In my opinion and from previous weddings I've attended,the wedding should be done in the lady's church.
ReplyDeleteFor yoruba's,the wedding is usually done in the bride's parents church cos they are the ones giving out their daughter just like engagement is done in the bride's parents house.
The bride only gets married in her own church that is the church she attends if her parents aren't Christians or don't have a home church they attend.
But I think guys shouldn't argue this point because the lady will be attending your church for the rest of her life.So,why not give her/her family the honour of doing it at their church.
Exactly
DeleteGot married den in my parents church
DeleteYoruba's do things 4 favour their girl child at times, I love them 4 that.
DeleteSo Odi is married
DeleteI actually think she's divorced "I got married then"
DeleteIt should be done in the lady's Church.
ReplyDeleteThe lady's church ofcourse
DeleteHappy world's #NoBraDay
Its the girls church jor, after wedding she follows her hubby simple.
ReplyDeleteThat nonsense is usually prevalent among catholics. Parents of the bride usually insist you must wed her in the Catholic Church before you carry her home. Esp among us igbos.
ReplyDeletePure nonsense I tell you! !! A friend of mine who was a staunch Catholic b4 marriage had this issue of where to wed.Her then fiance now hubby is an Anglican. She was insisting that she couldn't get married in any other church that's not Catholic, especially cuz she was a chorister in the church. I felt like resetting her brain with a resounding slap.I told her that if I were a gut and a girl insists on such stupidity with me, I WILL DROP HER SO FAST, she wouldn't know what hit her.And I made sure I said it to her fiance's hearing.
DeleteSTELLA; "CHURCH WEDDING IS MAN-MADE!". IT BRINGS MONEY TO THE CHURCH! I learnt that from LADY IGO on this blog. Tell me (if you know please come under my post and write) anywhere in the New Covenant or Old where wedding was done in church or synagogue? Wedding was always done in the bride's home (payment of Bride price). John 2: Jesus and his disciples were invited to Cana in Galilee to attend the wedding ("attend" and not to officiate"). How many couples did Jesus wed? How many couples did the Apostles wed; read the Acts?
ReplyDeleteIn as much as there is nothing wrong in hosting church folks and eating and drinking, people should not make a big deal about it. Ladies if a man you love pays your bride price, YOU ARE MARRIED!
No biggie. And it's not written anywhere. Na oyibo tradition we copy.
DeleteGbam. The most important thing in all is paying the bride price. All this wedding palaver we put for our head I no understand. In Assemblies of God, you can wed either way. If the couple don't have money, we do what we call church blessing where pastor will pray for the couple after bride price, then you carry your wife go. The particular thing our Pastors always ask is; have you paid the bride price? Then they confirm from the brides parents. Then it becomes optional, white wedding or church blessing. This does not stop the couple from legalizing their marriage through registry.
DeleteIt may be man made but it invites the third and most important party to the marriage; Jesus. This is why marriage is referred to as 3fold cord. The Holy Communion taken by the couple seals it and brings a higher power.
DeleteI believe where and where not to do a church wedding is a matter of choice and Compromise between the couple. Parents are involved most times.
True story.
DeleteWorddddddd!!!!!!
DeletePls oo women don't listen to some ppls rubbish.payment of brideprice is NOT marriage.marriage in court is d main thing then marriage in the church.bride price doesn't make u his wife when he dies or says he is no more interested then u wud know d importance of court marriage.
DeletePls oo women don't listen to some ppls rubbish.payment of brideprice is NOT marriage.marriage in court is d main thing then marriage in the church.bride price doesn't make u his wife when he dies or says he is no more interested then u wud know d importance of court marriage.
DeletePls oo women don't listen to some ppls rubbish.payment of brideprice is NOT marriage.marriage in court is d main thing then marriage in the church.bride price doesn't make u his wife when he dies or says he is no more interested then u wud know d importance of court marriage.
Deleteanonymous you talking rubbish,in Africa,Nigeria,payment of brideprice is the only recognised form of marriage,there is nothing like church marrige
DeleteIt's actually a big deal for some people,but it's mostly done in the girl's church since you taking her to your church. But any where that is comfortable for both couple it shouldn't be a thing of quarrel.
ReplyDeleteit is usually the bride's church the wedding holds not the other way round!
ReplyDeleteD couple should come to an agreement on where to wed, its no bigger, hubby and I wedded in his church + we are both catholics and we never had an ish deciding where it should be done...
ReplyDeleteAre you daft? This isnt for u so get out! They are talking about different churches. Kmt
DeleteWe have treated so something like this here...
ReplyDeleteWhere I come from,the wedding is done in the groom's church...but the Yorubas do theres in the bride's church...
I don't really know about the north...
Linda it's not only yoruba's that do theirs in the bride's church,
DeleteAm from Akwa Ibom, and we do it in the bride's church too.
I'm Yoruba, my parents attend different churches. I resorted to doing everything (trad, white n reception) in a venue (it has changing rooms) . I used the gallery for the church service n the pastors had their chances to do whatever, all in 1hour, lol. All depends on what the families decides.
DeleteExactly..
DeleteD weddg is @ d groom's church..
@queen You're very correct.
DeleteCorrect!
DeleteAbeg na d woman church go join dem 2geda cus dat may b d last tym she may worship dere if d husband is nt frm dat church,so its more lyk a last honor 4 d bride's parent cus dere daughter mite change religion or worship else were since a woman's religion is nt constant.
ReplyDeletea.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
As far as naija is concern, is the guys church. she think say to pay bride price na beans neh.....
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
Not naija.
DeleteI think there is no rule when it comes to this. The couple should choose what works for them. Marriage is about compromise and this is one area in which you need to compromise. My husband and I were from the same church so we didn't face this problem. I know a couple that chose a neutral hall and invited the pastors from their churches and campus fellowship to officiate their wedding. Each pastor had a function. I equally know a couple that wedded in the bride's church. It really depends on the situation.
ReplyDeleteOnly if d parents are not active in their own church. We used a neutral hall (d ecumenical centre) for my wedding and my (brides) parents pastors ministered.
DeleteMy husband and i are leaders and very active in another church but it wasnt even a topic of discussion dt my parents pastors would/wouldnt officiate. Im yoruba though.
Normally it's suppose to be in d gurl's church,after wedding d gurl follows her husband to his church.
ReplyDeleteI was born and baptised a catholic,and even though I attend pentecostal churches,marriage is a different ball game.I would love to get married in the catholic church.even if I'm to be married to a pentecostal member,I'm certain I can convince him about a catholic wedding.
DeleteI would love an outdoor joining sef not really a big fan of compulsory church building wedding...Does it really matter where or whose church Na wa!!
ReplyDeleteSame here
DeleteBut my mom won't hear of it
It is not stated any where that u either marry in the guys church or the girls own, guys do accept to marry the girl in her church, just for a curtsey or to respect her but I think its an agreement on both d man and the woman to decide where they want.
ReplyDeleteBoom (((((for a curtsey))))
DeleteD guy's church to me ooo
ReplyDeleteI think it's Ideal to wed in the girls church since you're taking her away to yours anyway. But as a typical Igbo man my husband no gree so we did it in his own church, plus location and convenience were also factors to consider. For me it really doesn't matter as long as you're both Christians, just reach a compromise Shikena.
ReplyDeleteGbam!!!! So long as we are both Christians it really doesn't matter!!!!
DeleteI am yet to see Muslims argue about some stupid stuffs we do as christians
Abi ooo
DeleteIn Nigeria here the marriage ceremony is usually done in the brides parents church..... But in the case where the intending couple attends the same church I think its better they do it in their church
ReplyDeleteIt's done in the brides parents church and not the girls church or grooms church.
DeleteAm a woman, it should be done in the mans church pls unless you both agree to go to your church
ReplyDeleteI think this is a personal decision for the intending couple and their family members. In Catholic homes, parents usually prefer to have their wards (whether male or female) to marry in the Catholic Church.
ReplyDeleteThis is a normally a resolved matter for matured altar-bound couple while courting. For me,as a girl, i would say my parent's church or the church where we have agreed to worship when married. It really is a first step to the necessary compromises that marriage entails and a guy who gets very dictatorial about this should have red flag planted on his head........ but a sensible couple shouldn't sweat it coz what matters is that we are going to get married and sweetly torture each other forever........ totally unrelated but ehmmmmm, bride price payment and court marriage is a must.
ReplyDeleteDas actually the problem my Bestie and her fiancé are currently having but personally I think it's only right for the wedding to take place in the lady's church, it merely etiquette, after that the man will take his wife to his own church...so its the lady's church for me o
ReplyDeleteSorry dear, but your bestie never ready marry!
DeleteWell, depends on the individuals.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who's a Catholic but hubby is Pentecostal, but they wedded in the Catholic Church.
They attend any of the two.
I guess it's a matter of serving one God and the couples being in agreement.
But most people don't agree with that though.
It's either the man's church or nothing.
In my opinion, to avoid this,such couples should talk about their different denominations early enough while still dating.
That's what this friend of mine did.
The man did not mind at all, so long as he was keeping the girl...lol.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Lol
DeleteNo,they don't. They're newly married though, but understand each other.
Then, about the disparity thing,it's not in every home.
Speaking from family experience of almost three decades and living in peace. :D
#WhiteDiamondOut
As a professional
ReplyDeleteIntroduction is for the girls family to entertain her inlaws
Engagement is for the girl's family
Church wedding its at d girl's parent's church and for the groom to feed the guests
But for nowadays it depends who is rich!
And understanding matters
The bills can be splited between both Man and woman no big deal.
If u don't av money! Pls forget big wedding
Simple!
It all depends on the couples choice.. Moi will love mine in my church(That's even why I want to marry a catholic,because of ish like this).
ReplyDelete**Som Baby**
As for me! U fuck me give me belle! Na u go carry all the bukata
ReplyDeleteI wonder why this is a topic for so much debate. Guys, it really doesn't matter where you are getting married. I have a friend who can argue for Africa and she said that it is wrong for a woman to get married in her mans church. I'm getting married in my man s church and I couldn't care less
ReplyDeleteI believe it's ideal to wed in d girl's church considering d guy is d one asking for her hand in marriage...but some guys like to form like they have d right to choose especially those that are catholics..apologies to d catholics..no offence intended..
ReplyDeleteI don't see anything wrong in getting married in d girl's church when she's going to be attending ur church after marriage...its just a one time thing..
Even my fiancé was like "babe isn't there a Catholic Church in ur place that we can wed?"
I said there is but I'm not getting married there cos that's not my church....my parents do not go there neither do I. ..and he said ok tho he would have really loved to get married in a Catholic Church...I said don't worry...
Later we can do a marriage blessing..it's enough that I have to attend d church after getting married...I'm not just used to their ways..
But if d girl and d guy can come to an agreement,then they can do it in d guy's church...
But I won't take it if my fiancé threatens to stop d wedding just because I refuse to get married in his church..for what now? Let's see who will beg na..
That's how my fiance's elder brother was just making mouth that if his girl doesn't agree to get married in his church, she should gerrout..I was just looking at him...
U wey never even see babe,u dey make mouth...
Anyways to stop all issues and disagreement,just go for registry..
Mtcheeeeeeeeeew. When ancestral spirits are fighting some people............. they quarrel over minor issues.
ReplyDeleteFor me, as long as your Church preaches CHRIST as the Son of God, I will wed in your church. What should be a bigger problem is where we would worship after the wedding.
We sometimes pay tooooooooo much attention to wedding ceremonies which wont take more than 8 hours and ignore the most important part i.e Life after the ceremony ( Marriage)
M muslim so I really dont knw abt churches and weddings but all d 1ns v heard abt r in d ladies church oo.. then after wedding u start attending husbands church. .
ReplyDeleteIf u don't marry me in my parent's church bye bye! Cus I av to Give my parents their last respect b4 I start attend my hubby's church! Dat guy nevver ready! Shey na him go give me out!
ReplyDeleteThe guy is a BARGAR!
what if as a girl ur parents attend deeper life but you do not like the church?
DeleteThe few weddings I've attended was done at the girls church.
ReplyDeleteMy cousins wedding that is coming up next week is going to be in her church.
I think it's a form of respect to the brides family or so.
And something as insignificant as this would make some people call off their wedding oh. Mtseeeeew
I've been busy like hell
Doing three things at a time is crazy!
I dunno. As for me, wedding will be in my church. Dear hubby, even if u r catholic, dat is ur own cup of kunu
ReplyDeleteThe bride's church is better. That is a kind of last respect
ReplyDeleteThe bride's church. No retreat no surrender
ReplyDeleteIt depends on d intending couple.
ReplyDeleteTraditionally,it's holds in d ladies church many tnks 2 her parents,wey go dey form "we trained our daughter well,d pastor or priest, laity or deacons gats to see ooooo!! And the groom parents go jst dey pretend sake of say "Na we wan marry una pikin,if we disagree una fit vex and so we no get choice"
for me o,wedding na for my church,afterwards we fit dey go ur church(hubby)
It's d couples decision that matters most. Be it in the grooms or brides church, it's d presence of God that matters.
ReplyDeleteWhat they should consider is the proximity for both families, and how close it is to the reception venue.
This church thing usually causes problem in marriage especially if both of them attend different churches. Catholic people always carry the thing for head like gala, if dey re getting married to someone dat attends another church weda man or woman, the wedding must hold in catholic church and they hardly change to their spouse's church, if dey do, their family can disown dem.
ReplyDeleteWhich ever church that rocks dia boat, to me church wedding is just to fulfill all righteous. Do ur trad wedding and court, good! It's only catholics that av dis kinda problem.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI am still single n mingling so i can't categorically give an ansa right until my Oga @ d top gives me d go ahead cos I dnt want to choose one church now and he will choose another wen d time comes
Btw nwunye Korkus where dd u wed? Ur church or Mr Korkus' church?
I am indifferent about that. A Church is a church it doesn't matter which one as long as both parties are cool with it.
ReplyDeleteAnywhere as long as it's a church... my sister got married in her husband's church... it's nothing... it's a matter of an agreement between the spouses.
ReplyDelete...hohohohoho
Biko anywhere so far those officiating are ordained men of God. if matter strong, then we go for court marriage. why fight over nothing
ReplyDeleteStella u just read my mind with dis post. This is causing a lil problem btwn my fiance & I. We r both catholic but in different location. We are both insisting that d wedding hold in our church. I have a large family + frnds. He said paying my family members flight tickets won't be a problem but will only pay for my close frnds. Besides my sisters got married in my own church. This won't g dwn well with my family @ all. Plus i'm going to change location & attend his own church the rest of my life! I dnt knw why he cnt understand. Pls how do we resolve this issue?
ReplyDeleteDo as your man said...
DeleteLearn to start being submissive...marriage is not beans oh...
My friends father was a priest in the Anglican why the guys parents are Catholics when it became bad the couple decided to wed in the court and dat ended the whole issue
ReplyDeleteStella u just read my mind with dis post. This is causing a lil problem btwn my fiance & I. We r both catholic but in different location. We both wnt the wedding to hold in our respective churches. I have a large family + frnds. He said paying my family members flight tickets won't be a problem but will only pay for my close frnds. Besides my sisters got married in my own church. This won't go dwn well with my family @ all. Plus i'm going to change location & attend his own church the rest of my life! I dnt knw why he cnt understand. Pls how do we resolve this issue?
ReplyDeleteThere is no hard and fast rule to it.In d bible, I am not aware of any wedding that held in th church. The wedding Jesus attended was not in the church. That being said, where to get married should easily be sorted out by the couple. A friend of mine got married in her inlaws church. Not hers, mot his. Find a balance and work with it
ReplyDeleteThe lady's church. She is the one being married to another church, so why not give her church the last respect.
ReplyDeleteIt is done in the bride parents church.
ReplyDeleteLook at how our minds run together
ReplyDeleteI had a serious argument on this with a friend on sunday..
Let me wait and read comments..
Nawa o... People can fight for rubbish things. I believe if the both of u think as one it wont be a problem. U can wed in the lady's church just like a last respect to her n her family. When you are done u take her to your church, or just wed in d church that you have both decided to join after marriage. Let your spouse stand by u and u by him in whatever decision you take....All this small children thing sef...Dats y my friend go say i must marry a man as in MAN not boyman...
ReplyDeleteIts's a personal decision for the intending couples and their family members. They jst hv to reach an agreed decision
ReplyDeleteIt's not a must to get married in d parents church here or there, I think it's a matter of understanding by both couple.
ReplyDeleteAnon1542 you are right. I once said it here when aarriahe post came up and I chided our ppl as the only ones on earth that do multiple marriages on one person and they said kpogbuo ya kpogbuo ya. No where in the bible was any marriage done in the bible. Even our lord Jesus didn't attend a wedding, he attended a wedding feast. The party called after the wedding was done in the bride's father's house as ought to be. All these so called church marriages are merely man made social designs to bring fund to the coffers and maintain dominion over ppls lives
ReplyDeleteAt the end it boils down to what the couple is ok with... sadly most parents interfere in stuffs like this. Thankfully I married a Catholic as myself. If it were different it wouldn't 've been a problem so long as we get married in a church.
ReplyDeleteThe couple should have the same belief so @ the end they wont have issues of where to wed.And this goes a long way to prove that we dont worship the same God.Si must marry a man that shares my faith.
ReplyDeletemadam precious ibik,worry not.by the time u reach 35yrs na so ur papa go gree u marry even ogboni
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahaha @ ogboni
DeleteIf both couples attain the same church there's no big deal, but in a situation that they attain different churches, the marriage should be done in the brides church since that has become her second home were she's known by many people by this your giving her an honor & seeking her permission from taking her out of her place of worship to the grooms.
ReplyDeleteI was born and brought up a catholic. I married a Pentecostal, and I have no regrets whatsoever because he is one of the best decisions I ever made in my life.i remember when I used to say I will never leave the Catholic Church or marry a non catholic,but all the catholic boys dat came my way were all messed up,I bless God it did not work out for me and them. I got married in the Catholic Church but joined my husband to his church,it was not easy blending cos I never attended a Pentecostal church before marriage.its been five years now and I got no regrets
ReplyDeleteAll these drama... I wedded in a garden. Had d priest come to the garden. No first reading or all that. Just blessing the union, signing of certificate and exchange of rings. Then everybody go and eat. No time for 'where should we get married quarrels' .
ReplyDeleteall those talking about catholics and Anglicans, the Catholic church recognises most things done by Anglicans, since they are almost same. As for i am Catholic and would love to wed in my church..can go to my hubby's church after the marriage sha oo.. it all depends on what we agree on..but i pray to marry a catholic like me to avoid all these unnecessary issues about faith and belief.
ReplyDeleteWhy is there so much division in the body of Christ? Is Christ divided? What should be on anyone's mind is meeting with fellow Believers in a bible believing place of worship. May God save us all from "ultra OUTWARD" show of faith.
ReplyDelete