Love isnt easy you say?Well,no one said it would be!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE...
ASK HIM OR NOT
Hi Stella.. ... Please I'll be very grateful if you can help post this topic.. I've been seeing and hanging with this guy for 4months and we talk and see very often. But he is yet to say what we are doing? Hasn't put a definition. He treats me like am his girlfriend..kiss -hug-NO SEX and his no PRESSURE from him.
we go on dates and I pretty much want more than just that. Should i ask him or just go with the flow?? I just want to know if we are just friends or dating. Am not in a hurry to settle so no pressure. And I don't want him to think am desperate. I just like people who are straight forward with their INTENTIONS.
If you are not under pressure why do you want to ask him anything?continue enjoying the time together and do not open your legs for him or let him touch you suggestively.keep your distance and dont be available for anything free and you will be fine.
You can have male friends without strings attached and do lunch,dinner and all.Have self control and stop him if he attempts to cross the line.
.......................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
CONFUSED ABOUT MARRYING
Stella I am sure you know me already from my email address, thank God for using you tremendously to elevate people, God bless you more abundantly!
I am a single mum to a boy of four years old, and things have been good for us,lemme not say it in a bad way....
The story between me and my ex is so devastating that if i should start it might take up to three days to round it up...
but that's not why I am here, the reason why I am writing this chronicle is because recently i met a guy, the guy is a PA to a pastor and he also does other things, so he asked me out and i was like he's not serious at all being that i am 28 and he's 25 haba! ...... never done such in my whole life!
What impudence!..... so i told him that we should be friends like brother and sister.... that's all i can do for him but stella, this guy has been promising with his life and saying it confidently that he's serious and even going ahead to tell his dad that he wants to marry me in two years time......
To say i am still dumbfounded is an understatement!
He asked me recently where he can get a good ring, i curiously asked him what for and he said i shouldn't mind that i should just tell him where to buy it.... not until he told me he wanted to give it to me, to engage me! shuoooo, na magic?
JESUS!! i am seeing something different o, for the first time ever!
meanwhile, i told him to forget it oooo that he should look for a single younger girl, he now said no that thoes girls eat and run.... hian!!!
I kept reminding him that i am a single mum oooo, and even bigger than him. he said he will take care of my son and that no problems and he also said if his dad and my mum disagrees we should go abroad and come back after two kids, I am not in for that kind of a thing o, but he won't let me be!
I even insulted him that he's only looking for osho free pu**y, he said that we should wait till our wedding night!
na there fear grip me again oh!
OMG, ME WEDDING???
In this life?? that means God is exceedingly merciful o.
please help me bvs and Stella, i like him though cos he seems responsible but I am extremely scared because I have gone through shitz before and i am not ready for any again!
what should I do now???
Now i will repeat what i told you after seeing your pic and his...You look like his mum and he looks like a 16 year old boy who is probably looking for a mother figure...
I dont know what else to tell you but to be careful,you are really very beautiful but inside your beautiful confusion lies DESPERATION and it has blinded you from seeing that this young man needs time to mature before proposing....No mature man will tell you to run away with him becos he owes no one any explanation on his choice of wife.
This is my two cents and i dont need anyone to tow my line,you wanted the truth and i have given it to you...Age is nothing but a number but let this one mature a little more first,still watch him and give him a few years.ALL THE BEST.
Hmmmmm love..?
ReplyDeleteJoblesshousewife
Desperate ladies being desperate since 1909! Pls stop it!!
Delete@poster1 : you are dating yourself, don't ask him anything.
DeleteJust dump him n he will be the one 2 speak out.
@poster2 : please say NO to time wasters!
All you need is a matured man n not a boy.
Please 4get the born boy.
Poster 2 u are already blinded by his love....pls wait for ur own man...
DeleteDon't follow his advice it might back fire later...
Hold unto God, very soon things will turn around for u & ur son...
Poster 1 why are u in a hurry..
Cool down
.
Poster 1...U sound like ur the one my ex is trying to gbensh on the side. No pressure is his motto for the newest side chik till she's head over hills and then she's welcomed to full house with gfs from different parts of the world. Is his name O.O ?
DeleteP2, You have a son, you are not rushing for any thing again.
DeleteDon't agree to his proposal, you guys should be friends and get to know him better. I know there are lots of matured guys out there in their early twenties but just chill please. Marriage us not beans o, he has to be emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually ready so just chill.
P1, Ask him if he has a gf, if it's no, ask why he isn't in a relationship, let him tell you what he wants. What if someone is really interested in you and just gives you space since you're always with him.
If you don't want to do it directly, ask him leading questions. Don't just be in friend zone without knowing it. If he is in a relationship, just continue being friends with him and be careful, for him to not have mentioned his gf to you sef nawa. Don't sleep with him sha.
4 months? And you don dey kiss?!
DeleteAnd you don't know where you are headed?
Shey una no fit do fuck and pass Ni? Women be thinking everything must be a relationship.
There's a guy I must kiss this evening, and if he doesn't smooch me while we are at it. I no go gree for the relationship.
No relationship till 2016.
Make i dey flaunt my curves.
Dont blame me..I'm bipolar
Hehehe
DeleteNa real small boy.
Maybe he wants to do apprenticeship of 'one chance' wit u abi na IT.
Hian!
Som1 wants to buy ring for his babe n doesn't want her to know yet he ask her where he can buy one...
Does it mean he has no friends?
U sef reason everytin.
Anyways u r mesmerized.
Age is just numbers for doz who don't c it as nothing.
I know young guys who married his seniors.
Also dating u for 2yrs... na real apprentice to know how to date or marry.
Please u ve enjoyed d love u feel.
Don't even kiss again. No more mushymushy.
Mature person u need.
Anyhow it is, clear ur eyes wella and count ur teeth wit ur tongue.
I know my body type. If I marry my age grade, visitors wud tink am his mummy.
A mate proposed to me. Hustling dude in love n doing very well. I sed NO. Firstly, I can't marry my age grade... Secondly, u r not me...
Mosi, I agree with your comment (for poster 1). Jokingly, don't be too serious while asking him( if he has girlfriend). From there further questions will come in. Wish you the very best.
DeleteThe second poster sounds like a popular bv here who Started commenting not quite long ago..
Delete'Single mother'
'Pastor' assistant.
'big'
Don't blame me, na sdk blog teach me aproko..
Poster one: This kind of relationship happens often...he Will only get you into the relationship by caring for you. When he achieve his aim, he can back out immediately. Because he owe u no commitment. no matter how hard you ask him, he Will not ask you out. so don't force him.
DeletePoster 2: When a man fall in love, another fool as been given birth to. Kindly leave the boy to move on. At one point in life, one could be confused. just assume he is a confused boy. This is Africa, not Foreign land.
See: Deadly Mistakes You Must Not Make In Life
Hmmmmm...poster 1, see please stop, kiss and hug dey lead to something, my advice is don't getattached and don't always be available. Poster 2, God is exceedingly gracious, but I doubt this is him showing that to you, this guy does sound like a teenager but I might be wrong so give it time.
DeleteKeyjeh, your head dey dia! Na dat wife of latest pastor onetin onetin chick!
DeletePoster 2 is obviously latest bride of the most high God. She's a single mum, 28 years old, she wants to marry a man of God, I swear she's the one.
DeletePoster 2. D boys age worries me. 25? I wud advise u gv him a chance if he feels d same way and come 4 u in 10 yrs time. Ciao!
DeletePoster 2 : you better look well b4 getting ur self into another mess
DeleteUna sabi decode ooo Sdkers I bow for u pple,lol!
DeleteI also think it's that lady!
D young boy pastor probably saw thru her desperation to marry into d pastorial click,so he capitalised on it.
Btw madam,u sound too excited abt d whole thing dat u can't see!u are just 28yrs but I think u are rushing to get married to proove a point to some pple that are looking down on u.but don't do dat pls!u will only put urself in a bigger mess.btw there is something that boy is looking for from u,so he's using d marriage line to entice u.look around u and watch urself!that guy does not seem matured enuf to handle issues (he wants u two to elope),talk more of catering for another's child.u will see him fall apart like a pack of cards.hes probably infatuated atm!
Poster 2 sounds like that BV with a 'prayer' name....'dear God have mercy on me like Sunmbo' 'latest wife of a man of God' or something like that..... I remember her commenting once that she's 27. So 28 isn't so far. Lol
DeleteAnyhoo, you seem to be swept off your feet. Because you don't feel you're good enough for the kind of man you deserve. Forget PA to pastor oh!! Na dem dey do pass. If he's not spirit filled he isn't. Shikena!
Besides, some of these boys have underlying psychological issues. Kindly ask him about his mother and what their relationship is like. Also ask him what his love life in the past has been like. It's either he doesn't have a good relationship with his mum, hence the need to be with women who are 'motherly' or he has been dating older women right from time and was probably disvirgined by one (as is usually the case). Aren't you too old to be thinking of eloping and marrying someone? Hian!
his mother is dead
DeletePoster 1, no need to ask him anything. Just go with d flow and tie your legs wella. Wait till he says what he wants.
DeletePoster 2, babe abeg. U sincerely don't need a man with dt age abeg, u sound like you've given up on getting a better dude cos you've gotta a child. I think he's too young dear, just be friends and stand your ground.
Jesus fix it!!!
ReplyDelete********LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*******
What's thr to fix? Imbecile
DeletePoster1-ask him indirectly#poster2-if u r nt ready to b a single mother of 2 better tk ur time n pray about it.........em Jay I think u need d fixing more.
DeleteIf dem call u olodo, u go dey feel say na insult, but its d fact. U are such a dunce
DeleteAnno15:28,use ur id first freak of nature,and to d ekp mumu,thunder fix ur skull,beautiful goats.
DeleteOlodo you are the one who needs fixing.....dafty....
DeletePlease what is Jesus fixing here ooooo biko
DeleteKaycee and anno 16:40,which advise did u give,did she use ur mb or fone,hate kills,jealous mofos repeat and leave her alone.
DeleteIs she d only one using jesus fix it,so wats d heck?
DeleteJesus fix it
Jesus fix it
Jesus fix it.
Oya make all of una die now,bastards.
Jesus pls fix it!
ReplyDeleteFix what???
DeleteFix the relationship....lol
DeletePoster 1 desperado lomo yen *just singing in davidOs voice.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 25 year old guy? Has his PP as in Penis finished grooming? Hian
Pls ask her for me.
DeleteDoppelganger and amaka. Beds of a feather. 2 odes. No home training. No sense
DeleteLmaooo @ Anon calm down na
DeleteAnon 18:54 I'm not the cause of your problem, take it to God.
Delete1] Impatience! Siddon dey look, in the meantime chop money and enjoy!
ReplyDelete2] Impatience!! Wait for a more matured man, so you won't run again.
Is life all about chopping money? This kind of mentality reflects your kind of background. Maybe the inmocent girl is even more loaded than the guy in question, who knows. Hungry girls!
DeleteAnon thanks joor, all they know is Chop money. One day you will Chop and ur boobs will dissappear, poverty causing this mentality
DeleteDon't mind this foolish Linda....she was married off early to save her family from poverty so all she knows about relationship is money...shioooor
DeleteSee them, brokeass anonymous. Looking for who to fuck free of charge with poverty sperm.
DeleteGo and make some money jare and stop being frustrated.
Hahaha na so e pain una reach?? Una kpele oooo
DeleteI LOVE MONEY!!! If you can't deal...nwanne go mud!! Inukwam akuko
Anon 16:42 come here now, carry ur comment and go look for Linda wherever she is biko... Idiots
Poster 1, please ask him o! I like to define my relationship with people from the onset.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, leave that kiddo biko
Poster one, just allow him bang u to clear ur doubts...hahahahaa
ReplyDeletePoster two, dat guy is fantasizing....or don't u see it?
He will shine ur congo like a bull n walk, his parents would even support him...if na lie, try ur luck...dey use smallie play..u neva jam.
Your naughty! Lol
DeletePoster 1
ReplyDeletemtschew..... Fuck na. AFTER YOU FUCK, THE RELATIONSHIP GO GET AUTOMATIC DIRECTION. It doesn't matter if it is front or back. hehehehe.
Poster 2
mtschew..... Agbaya.... You wan enter smtn wey no dey sustainable over a long period of time shey. When u dey celebrate 40th bday, ur "horse-band" go be 37. na wa
Abeg someborri shd remind me of money maker's gbagauns. I need them to make my day
Oil they ur head.
DeletePoster 2: someday,that young man will say u stole his mid youth from him.Lets be factual, a woman @ 20 to 25 is mature and ready for marriage bt a man at 20 to 25 might still be trying his luck.Therefore, don't get carried away by what u hear from him.Does he not know his way to abokis who sell gold or even 5k rings? Y should he ask u? Dude is playing with u cos he sees d desperation.Goodluck on ur decision but remember, he needs a lot of growing to do and if u already look like his mum, it won't be long in the marriage he will tell side chics how u needed a father figure for ur son and forced him to marry u.
ReplyDeletePoster 1,
ReplyDeleteWhat's your problem?...
What do women really want?...abeg continue flowing with him like that if you are gaining monetary favour from him...
But don't marry him like that oh...make sure you taste before buying...
Poster 2,
Grab the dude sharp sharp!...
Age is nothing but a number...me I like them young!...
Lemme go anon on this one!
DeletePoster 1, my advice is to enjoy it while it lasts. I ve been here in your shoes and initially I was not down with the closeness but I continued cuz I was enjoying the benefits. Fast forward to today, we are enjoying ourselves.... he foots my bills even when I no ask nd he gives me great sex! we are happy and that's what matters.
So my advice enjoy it while it lasts. It's better than sleeping with I never chop guys.
16:26, Abi ooooo
DeleteAnon 16:26
DeleteYou sleep with him ,he foots your bills ,that's prostitution (harlotry)
Jesus loves you ,please stop-you deserve better
Anon 16:26- maybe you are one of us who has a firm hold on our emotions.
DeleteMost girls on this blog don't. Sorry to say. She might follow your advice and things turn out this same way for her. Tmr she will send in chronicles about how she gave him her all and he went and married someone else. How she's traumatized and wondering if she wasn't good enough. Haha!
Poster, if your emotions can't handle whatever the outcome might be, please ask questions now oh!
Poster 1: abeg ask if need be. Which one is enjoy it while it last? Huh? Wat happens if u meet sum1 more better and walk out? He'll say u cheated whereas he never said anything about ur relationship. Stella, I disagree with u on dis one.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: I no fit talk. Stella said he's looking 4 a mother figure? Lmao. Is he dat small? Stella, love is in d eyes of the beholder o. My dear, give him a trial and yes even if u av sex with him and he walks away, take it in good faith. Moreover u both will enjoy the sex.
Bye!!!
Huh?
DeleteSleep with pastor's assistant
Haha! !!
Sex has turn to yawning for people
No regard nor consideration
Kai! !@
@ poster 1 pls don't mind Stella u better ask him where things re heading before u have high hopes and get ur heart broken.
ReplyDelete@ poster 2 pls and pls say NO, ppl would say age is just a number but I would tell u age truly matters, since Stella said he has seen both our pix and he sure looks younger pls encourage him to get another girl, urs is on the way.
Yes o, poster 1 ask him
DeleteBwahahahhahhahhahahha
ReplyDeleteWhy am I laughing sef??
Will read comments, lol.
Stella show me pix so me too can advice constructively.
ReplyDeletePs 1: go wit d flow.
Poster one,
ReplyDeleteIf he doesn't want to talk, can't you talk and ask him? If you toast him, is it a sin?
Better still, keep quiet and continue enjoy in his money, pending when another guy who has mouth toasts you, agree for him
Hehehe yes! Keep quiet nd continue enjoying his money. Don't fuck him o. When beta guy that can talk comes along pls agree for him
DeletePoster one: You hang with him? Una be bats?
ReplyDeleteHmmm
Anyway, men hate being pressured into commitments of any sorts. Just go with the flow and shine your eyes.
Don't waste your time in an undefined relationship though.
Poster two: Hmmm
Hope he's not one of these guys that have a fetish for older women?
The age difference is not much sha,but don't be carried away by his 'chivalry '.
Dazall!
#WhiteDiamondOut
Lol @ una be bats...
DeletePoster1: why running ahead of urself in a red satin dress? Lol... What happened to being friends b4 throttling to a full r/shp, that's why thrs daily chronicles, una too rush, haba a relationshp isn't walkn into a supermarket and walkn out wen u don't find a particular product, if u keep treatin it as such, ur punani nai go suffer am... Go with th flow gal.
ReplyDeletePoster2: well, he just might be a keeper, keep the friendshp/ watever ure doin wit him going... He's stil young at heart and in th sack hehehehe.... No need to rush.
Poster1 can't you just take him like one of your girlfriend,if you feel you like him too much ask him
ReplyDeletePoster2 you want to marry your younger brother age mate. Two years time mumu
Poster 1, ask him. Before u get carried away by every thing and open ur legs for him. I know his type smooth operator. If he sleeps with u he will start giving you attitude and before u know it he will start telling people that u threw urself at him. That he did not even ask u for a relationship.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, be deceiving us. You like the guy and you're even contemplating marrying him. But before u make that mistake know that age is not just a number when the woman is older. When u give birth to one or two you will know that you married your kid brother.Go find ur mate.
poster 1. If you like, take Stella's advice and dont ask whats up, by the time you chase every eligible bachelor away from you because of your constant date with him and become anty gwegs, you wee know how far...
ReplyDeleteGuy is busy enjoying your company alongside free hugs and kisses, before you know it you have offed paent...smooth operators wont rush you to their beds, na you go off paent without stress...
Asin eh.
DeleteLol..
DeleteYou comment is nothing but the truth..
True@ lara, and after u av offed paent" they will start ignoring you and giving u cold shoulders ..... Na u go come dey find their attention.
DeleteLara, thank u. Babe ask o
DeleteFor the first time ever, I agree with your advice to both posters. Haba! That guy na pikin na @poster two.even me wet never near you age no fit marry guy way dey reason like that...where you go buy ring,elope abroad.the guy still dey fantasy land o. Owu never jam am..free the guy o.
ReplyDeleteP1 Jiri ya nwayo oo. You sounded very young,so don't be in a haste,just be wise.
ReplyDeleteP2 Go with Stella's advice.
**Som Baby**
hmmmm... reading comments!
ReplyDeleteI strongly blv u r poster 2
DeleteWelcome poster 2
DeleteHow won't you read comments, when you are "poster two".
Deleteshuooo, na wetin na?
DeleteHahahahaha
DeleteAijay, You may be right o.
Aunty prophet of God, is that you?
Poster two is latest bride..... desperation now wants to make u marry a toddler. Carry on
DeleteLmao @ toddler! Una no go kill person. Aunty prophet u better not marry that pikin....coz he'll start cheating on u by the time he's 26 and u have deflated his foam at home with ur big body
DeleteLatest bride see questions oh
DeleteI believe too!!
DeleteHahahaha this is too funny
DeletePoster 1...please enjoy the friendship, and yes you sound desperate lolz
ReplyDeletePoster 2...please listen to stella
Poster 2: what if,all he wants is someone to pick his bills and a home to call his?
ReplyDeleteIs his pay sufficient to hold a family ? I hope in the bid to be called MRS u won't enter serious one chance. Then you would have had 2 kids with 2 different men .who would want you then ?
P1 Smooth guy!
ReplyDeleteU' r bein economical with the truth!
What kind of conversation happened till it led to kiss n hug???
U like him n he's jus reciprocating the feelins...
OYO ooooooo...
P2 Either God has truly reasoned ur matter OR
The guy is totally confused.
Love is mysterious right!!!
Since the defination of love is "blind". Then the guy is truly BLIND for U!!!
Lolololololol
Definition of love is blind ? Really. Lol
DeleteHes weighing his options to know if u match his criteria for a GF, hes a correct guy, he wldnt want to make mistakes in hand picking.... but u na, u no fit wait to fuck am, tell me, wats the diff bw now and wen ure in an actual r/shp with him?.... uhu, u see, its just the sex, u see ur life!!! after u'd be sayin "he used me".... u wont keep it low now, while u know more about him.
ReplyDeletePoster 1
ReplyDeleteSome relationships need to be defined. You don't kiss ur friend.So,if he's bn kissing u on d mouth then I think u need to ask him what your being together means.
Some guys that tow that line have girlfriends but they just keep that spot with u and when u ask them the question of 'what are we' like a year or two later,u get the shocker of ur life. I'd say ask him,not with an 'I'm desperate' kinda tone tho.
Poster 2
I had to swallow the advise I had in mind for you when Stella said u look like his mom in d pix u sent to her.Age is nothing but a number,but not when u look like his mom already
Every lady on this blog is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWho are the............ones sending in........ Birthday pictures?
Kikikikiki anonymous bv's.
DeleteLmao!!! Everybody is beautiful in their own way na
DeleteThis your comment is wicked, but it cracked me up big time..
DeleteROTFL..
You such a meanie lol
Deletehahahahahahahaaha,Quickie YOU ARE WICKED!!!!! Choi,beht why nau????
DeleteBeauty is in the eyes.............
DeleteLMAO!!!
DeleteLol...Stella...u ehh...Why u go say the lady look like is mum Haba..
ReplyDeleteWas d pic also sent to u? Stella has got eyes u know.
DeleteNwa amaka, na u be that.
ReplyDeleteChronicle is here. Let me sit down and read comments.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, which one is no pressure yet you are this worried.
ReplyDeleteAbeg go with the flow, atleast u have a frnd, u hang out and all.
Advice here is, stop the kisses and don't open ur legs for him. Next time u are saying goodbye, peck him and if he complains, tell him u ain't his gf ans watch what he says.
That wAY, if u meet someone else u can easily leave without guilt.
Poster 2, wanted to say age is just a number but no be for physical features o
I left an ex because even tho he was older than me with 4years, he looked like an 18 year old boy and his dressing didn't help either....always casually on jeans and polo.
So if the difference is much physical, pls let him go. Unless the parents approves shaa
Exactly this poster 1. Stop the kisses and say no more kisses until you know what the relationship is.
DeleteChronicles kwenu! Chronicles kwenu!! Chronicles ...!!!
ReplyDeleteStellakork she's talking about kiss and u talking about no strings attached? Ifa hear except isn't d kind of hug and kisses dat I am thinking about........... Some kind kiss fit make u cum.
ReplyDeleteSo True. Nah from clap dem dey enter Dance. Poster one define the relationship and stop kissing for free
Deleteposter 2.
ReplyDeleteYou have not learnt from your previous relationship from the tone in this ya chronicle. You are still a child at heart.
One small boy is telling you that he wants to marry you in 2 YEARS TIME oooo. And you are here jumping up with joy, hehehehe. Two years is long enough for him to love you, care for you, chop you, f**k you and still dump you. As old as he is, he doesn't know where they sell engagement ring and does not have friends he could inquire from??? Come, let me conk your head...
Thank you Lara P.
DeleteThank you for saving me from typing up a storm.
Poster 2,read Lara's comment over and over again but don't give her your head for a "conk" oooh...kikikikiki
Lol!
DeleteBride of the prophet of the most high, is that you?
ReplyDeleteWhy would you settle for the PA of a pastor out of desperation?
U re thinking wat am thinking
DeletePoster 2:dont mind dat guy define ur relationship with him asap.
Poster 2. You want to adopt a grown baby? Hehe!!! My dear... Love is not enough in 21st century.. My 2cent
ReplyDeletePoster 1: why don't you keep enjoying the groove?
ReplyDeletePoster 2: youthful exuberance dey worry that small boy. You just heard *marriage* and you lost control. Chai!
Don't worry a good and responsible man not boy will come your way.amen
Hmmmm... I'll stick with just reading today... All the best
ReplyDeletePoster 1:pls ask him o so you would know where you stand,incase someone else comes your way.
ReplyDeletePoster 2:the guy wants to chop and run, please be careful
Poster. 1, I ve a frnd lyk dt, we r alwz so close for 3 yrs , he even massages me a lot sef bt he neva asked me ask ndd I started dating anoda guy now my husband. He was d only frnd I had after I left skol then one day I told him dt I lied him nd dt I wantd us to date bt he didn't ask me out nd he was lyk y didn't you tell me, I felt mayb coz he is a Muslim nd he is a christian dt is y he didn't ask me out coz dt was wat broke his last r/ship. He felt so bad dt I didn't tell or ask him nd he said he liked me too bt couldn't say it, he was lyk let's give it a try nd dt was last yr, I told him I can't coz I am dating anoda guy now. Seriously I so liked that guy a lot. To end my story we decided to make sweet love.
ReplyDeleteRead your write up again and tell me if it makes sense to you
DeletePoster. 1, I ve a frnd lyk dt, we r alwz so close for 3 yrs , he even massages me a lot sef bt he neva asked me ask ndd I started dating anoda guy now my husband. He was d only frnd I had after I left skol then one day I told him dt I lied him nd dt I wantd us to date bt he didn't ask me out nd he was lyk y didn't you tell me, I felt mayb coz he is a Muslim nd he is a christian dt is y he didn't ask me out coz dt was wat broke his last r/ship. He felt so bad dt I didn't tell or ask him nd he said he liked me too bt couldn't say it, he was lyk let's give it a try nd dt was last yr, I told him I can't coz I am dating anoda guy now. Seriously I so liked that guy a lot. To end my story we decided to make sweet love.
ReplyDeleteYinmu
DeleteNarrative 2) naija mentality no go let me yan. Use your brain! If he's Ur brother will u allow such to happen?
ReplyDeleteTHELMA ENEMUWE said...
ReplyDeletePoster1---please do ask him what he wants from you,you can playfully ask him over y'al numerous dates and carefully observe his countenance whilst responding to you,its not adviceable for a lady to be in an undefined relationship,of what use is it to allow a guy lead you on without knowing your stand in his life,you asking him doesn't mean you're desperate,take the bull by the horn,ask him and save urself from heartaches and had i know in the future.....
Poster2----put on your thinking cap and let wisdom direct you..
*faithful BV enemuwe thelma*
THELMA ENEMUWE said...
ReplyDeletePoster1---please do ask him what he wants from you,you can playfully ask him over y'al numerous dates and carefully observe his countenance whilst responding to you,its not adviceable for a lady to be in an undefined relationship,of what use is it to allow a guy lead you on without knowing your stand in his life,you asking him doesn't mean you're desperate,take the bull by the horn,ask him and save urself from heartaches and had i know in the future.....
Poster2----put on your thinking cap and let wisdom direct you..
*faithful BV enemuwe thelma*
THELMA ENEMUWE said...
ReplyDeletePoster1---please do ask him what he wants from you,you can playfully ask him over y'al numerous dates and carefully observe his countenance whilst responding to you,its not adviceable for a lady to be in an undefined relationship,of what use is it to allow a guy lead you on without knowing your stand in his life,you asking him doesn't mean you're desperate,take the bull by the horn,ask him and save urself from heartaches and had i know in the future.....
Poster2----put on your thinking cap and let wisdom direct you..
*faithful BV enemuwe thelma*
THELMA ENEMUWE said...
ReplyDeletePoster1---please do ask him what he wants from you,you can playfully ask him over y'al numerous dates and carefully observe his countenance whilst responding to you,its not adviceable for a lady to be in an undefined relationship,of what use is it to allow a guy lead you on without knowing your stand in his life,you asking him doesn't mean you're desperate,take the bull by the horn,ask him and save urself from heartaches and had i know in the future.....
Poster2----put on your thinking cap and let wisdom direct you..
*faithful BV enemuwe thelma*
Let's say a prayer for faithful Thelma
DeleteE don do o
DeleteSome Baby mama can b desperate, hian dey don't care were d ring comes from.
ReplyDeleteI will read comments.
ReplyDelete#1...u no get oda toasters?how does he react wen u get oda guys' attention?d guy don dey date u for him mind na,u still dey dribble backward...una don dey kiss abi,next time grab his prick n see his reaction.if he gbensh,relationship don start officially be dat,if not,he be slacker,send his away
ReplyDelete#2. Even d guy don know say his parents no go gree...on a 2nd thought,d guy fit wan gbensh u @ all cost thereby doing everytin to warm ur heart.give him d coochie n u'l see a 360 degrees turn in his attitude
*send him away
Delete@Poster 2 so he wants to give you a 'lord of the rings' abi?
ReplyDeleteAbeg advise yourself biko, that smallie wants free and constant pu**y!
Poster 1. Free that useless man sharp sharp,who does that? How can a man smooch you without telling u what he wanted from u? I put it to your face that you're very cheap!!! When next u see him ask him what he actually wanted from u.o.k. Male friend my left foot!!!
ReplyDeletePoster2: are you this desperate? Do u really know the sh**t u wanna get yourself into? I can see that your quest for marriage has blinded your mental faculty.. ditch that young guy like crazy and look for someone more mature. The guy only wanna take advantage of your lonely situation and f**ck u for free,forget all those wedding night bullshit..
Golden princess has spoken.
Poster 1: If u guys aint dating, wot business do u two hav together kissing and even going on dates frequently? Assumptions are a no no in r/ship. He probably kud b using u to pass time. Kindly ask him to define the r/ship. If he refuses or can't, kindly friend zone him n enjoy d goodies he's offering u while it lasts but remember to tie ur legs together.
ReplyDeleteGbam
DeletePoster 2 pls allow the boy grow inugo?
ReplyDeletePoster 1 can't remember what I read sorry
P1, you better sit back, relax and enjoy the moment but jeep your legs closed like a pretty mermaid. P2, three years difference is ok if he was in his thirties kind of age. But 25, some of his mates are still in the university sef. Them full my hand, singing *age is nothing but a number* I kukuma deh give dem beat wella saying age is a number that starts from1 to zillions
ReplyDeleteGwegs, won't u send Anoda mail to yourself and hype again?
DeleteHehehe anonymous, ikr. After sending d fish head story, she sent to oda mail to hype. We never forget
Delete@ Poster 1, We wey God Create Us, We Manage Fine, Girls Always Ask Us Out But the Truth Is that We don't really take those Girls Serious, But is individual Difference shaa, My Advice Flow Along with the guy Don't Press the Like button, my 2Cent
ReplyDelete@ Poster 2, I Once Dated A Lady that Is Far Older than Me, I Just enjoy the Fun while it Last, Because me na Sure Igbo Man, Because I no our culture
Poster 2: hmmmmm sugar mummy things. Oriegwu. Kontinue till u send in anoda chronicle in two years time by then ppl wey dey tell u say 'age is just a number' won't b dere to helep u out. Btw i hv a feeling ds poster kud be bv Odi a.k.a dat messed up silly girl or bv Latest bride of the ..........
ReplyDeleteNarrative 1,you are desperate. You better take a back bench and allow the guy to open up.Women should always be the hunted and not the hunter!
ReplyDeleteNarrative 2, You are 28 and he is 25??? Onyi ana asokwa GI? The worst is that he acts so immature, how can he ask you where to buy good ring,Is he new in town?Osi esi banyesia? He want to engage you for 2years,you be lord of the rings??? Nne,I acknowledge the fact that you are a single mother, PLEASE don't be foolish and desperate at 28,just dress neatly and be your self, am sure you will attract a mature and responsible man.That guy is STILL immature.
Poster 2
ReplyDeleteYeah, sometimes women(few/some) get blinded/carried away with the rave of a particular moment and what the men in their lives tell them and this might be occurring in your case. Let's carefully highlight three discussion points between you two(I would try my best to stay neutral cos to me they all sound childish):
1. Asking you where to get a ring: In my opinion, that is a suggestive act to further convince you to accept his plea...@25 he buys his stuff and has friends, so he can ask that question to a thousand and one pple...why you ?
2.Going abroad and returning after 2kids: A mere utterrance without any plan or weighed decision. Does it just happen ? Which country would grant you guys such visa(except he means Ghana or the other 20something countries that can allow Nigerians entry but of course under certain clauses). Is he a citizen of any ? Does he even knw about life abroad or the conditions?
3. Waiting for the wedding night: erm...am i permitted to giggle? Well, thats what everyone says from the get-go knowing that it's most likely gonna change.....and sometimes it works on the reverse cos some guys who use this line believe you'll trust them enough to let them hve sex after the first few moments of abstinence....and most times it works.
These 3points seem to be what has got you thinking and tending towards believing his act but i'll say they are less calculated points which should reveal his thought pattern and for me, it holds little weight and ain't mature enough for the thought pattern of a man who is ready to settle down. He might be trying to fulfill a fantasy of having €%÷#^ with a lady who has a child(some men have such fantasy).
Well, If you are convinced that he is serious and this is sustainable considering the long term, then he can stay as a friend for the 2yrs he talked about and if his opinion and behaviour remains unchanged after that time, then you can send Li-yon Vls and other BVs a wedding invite by 2017....*smiles*
Have a blessed day dear.
Li-yon Vls.
Desperate lady here and there take am easy
ReplyDeleteANON 15.23, So you can be this real to even cement the 'friendship' with a Kpekus. hmmmm. women sha. they can run things and the man would be there not knowing the babe dey run cable for the man head. Even when you were seeing ur present day husband, you were still giving friendship kpekus to ur friend. Hope oga husband knows this consolatory kpekus. Men needs to be careful sha. women dey do things
ReplyDeletePoster 1, Poster 1, Poster 1! How many times I call you?
ReplyDeleteYou been dey kiss man wen nor gree toast u formally?
Stella say make u nor ask and u sef no go ask?
Suffer dey smell for your head o!
Iz this kind guy that wii tell u he's getting married next week just outta the blue.
Biko ask him quickly! You have crossed the line already, it's ok to ask.
Personally, i'm guessing the guy is prolly engaged and cutting show with u on the side
Poster1, be careful he doesn't sleep with you and dump you.
ReplyDeletePoster2, age is just a number, but look for you size.
Is poster 2 latest bride.........?
ReplyDeleteKikikiki
You obviously need to grow up, a lot more than the boy sef.
It's well
ReplyDeleteIt's well
ReplyDeleteHmmmm
ReplyDeleteHello @poster 1, please ask him what he wants in a nice way. This is to help you define your relationship with him. You sounded like you already like him from your post. Please ladies always define your relationships with people from an early stage. It will save you a lot of stress. And NO it won't make you look cheap or desperate rather, it will help you guard your heart.
ReplyDelete@ poster 2, give love a chance. Keep an open mind and let things unfold naturally while pretending to be a mermaid.
Good luck guys.
@Poster 1-Please enjoy it while it last... Take your time n build your friendship with him, a guy can be ur best friend. But if thungs turn around good, but dont keep dat in mind. Just let it flow
ReplyDelete@Poster 2-Hmmm..He does other things, pls wat are they... Please allow "lying" dogs to sleep oooo
Hmmmm
ReplyDeleteP1: four months is long enough. 9ja guys and their supposed sharpness no be here o.
ReplyDeleteIn your own interest meet with him and look at him in the face and ask all that bothers you babes.
For you guys to start kissing...then you are headed for the bed.
When asking him, let him understand that you are serious and you ain't desperate and that you don't have time to waste nor need anyone to lead you on.
While he responds...don't assume anything let him spell everything out.
All the people asking you to go with the flow will still insult you should you bring back a chronicles of how you went with the flow.
Be wise, and this is 21st century any guy that wants you should be able to speak out.
Do not assume.
Goodluck.
P2: babe are you for real?? Please take a chill pill . Are you a learner?? A guy is asking you where to get ring and it hasn't occurred to you that he is a scammer.
Anyway, just take things easy and you will be fine. Be patient and wait for your man a prophet that you have always wanted, I have I feeling that you are the lady with the longest id on this blog...anyway truth be told activate your brain.
PEACEFUL AND ENCOURAGING WIFE...
ReplyDeleteDear poster2, I don't want to judge you because you deserve to be happy. Why not give it time.
I will suggest you guys should give the relationship time so you both can mature very well. The guy sounds childish and might take off later in future when he is matured and can think maturely. So when he walks away to a younger babe what will happen to you and your son? Please take it to the lord in prayer. Let God direct you. Why not pray for someone more mature and older than you to marry you?
My dear think about it careful again.
May the peace of the lord continue to be with you.
PEACEFUL AND ENCOURAGING WIFE...
ReplyDeleteDear poster2, I don't want to judge you because you deserve to be happy. Why not give it time.
I will suggest you guys should give the relationship time so you both can mature very well. The guy sounds childish and might take off later in future when he is matured and can think maturely. So when he walks away to a younger babe what will happen to you and your son? Please take it to the lord in prayer. Let God direct you. Why not pray for someone more mature and older than you to marry you?
My dear think about it careful again.
May the peace of the lord continue to be with you.
p1, define ur relationship and stop hoping and wasting ur tym ..p2, after everything i v seen around, i cant advise any woman to marry a younger partner cos in most cases but not all thou if u v a smaller stature than d guy thou ,nobody will know.. age really matter in this marriage thing cos of maturity .as a woman , we quickly have matured reasoning than males....u cant compare the way a lady think to a man. for a 25 yrs old lady might think she is due for a family , while most 25yrs guy will think he has just start his life by making money and having fun till later.....but this is my own opinion thou. n sometimes, age is just a number......
ReplyDeletePoster 2,pls get ur mind off that young man,real men that have plans won't say much,he has said too much already. He is playing with ur mind,u nid a mature guy. Goodluck.
ReplyDeleteFor me personally i like a guy that tells me what he wants right from the on-set but i guess some guys are like that, they wont easily tell you what they want. Smtimes it works out fine, and sometimes it doesnt.
ReplyDeleteI met a guy and we were doing same thing,going out on dates,visits to eachodas house. And obviously we were having sex, i would spend the wkend at his. In my mind i assumed we were dating bcos of this. Next thing he started acting up, not calling as much, visits few and far beyond. I asked him whats up? Next thing he said im choking him and he's not ready for relationship. That after all he never asked me to be his girlfriend. I just pack my bag and move on abeg. And this went on for 1yr o, no definition of relationship.
My dear i didnt bother my head as i have another guy in America. I never met this guy before o, he was just introduced to me thru a friend. Withn 1mth of talking to this guy on phone. He came out and asked me to be his girlfriend, with the intention of marriage if everything works well. I havnt told him yes though, i told him when he visits end of this month we will talk about it. I cant just date sm1 iv never met over the phone. Let us meet physically first.
My point is when some men see what they want, they dont waste time. I will say give it 6mths, after 6mths abeg he has to define the relationship,its not about being desperate as Stella said. I wasted 1yr of my life dating myself. Meanwhile a guy iv never even physically wants a relationship.
Poster 2:
ReplyDeleteI think you should give a relationship a chance. You don't have to marry him yet, but try him out. What if he is just the right person for you. Many have said he is looking for a meal ticket, that may be true. However, we are aware that very many women are the bread winners in their homes irrespective of their husbands ages. Don't lose something that may give you joy simply because you don't know what society will say. The most he can do is break your heart, but so can an older guy. If you like him, and your children do, kindly ride on.
Poster 1:
ReplyDeleteIgnore Stella. You have a right to ask for a definition. Let no one waste your time. If he just sees you as a friend, you simply move on. Let him not be blocking your eyes from seeing other potential suitors.
Or potential suitors from seeing you
DeletePoster one, some guys are like that. My dear u are unconsciously in a relationship oooo. Just try n avoid his kiss and see what he will say. ...
ReplyDeletePoster two, abeg the boy is a small boy oooo. Just take him as ur younger bro cos when he matures, he will tell you his real mind...
...hohohohoho
Poster 1
ReplyDeleteUr already smooching the guy... But have failed to define ur relationship .so what are you doing ? Is it a fling , are u guys friends or dating unconsciously?
Pls define that relationship .ask him. Don't hold your peace, and if his answer isn't satisfactory, move on!
Poster 1, iv been in the very same situation as you. After about 4months, I asked the dude to define the relationship. Well, he said he really likes me but isnt ready for a relationship. I cried dt nyt but we still spent the night together as I couldn't leave that night. Take note,we weren't having sex. We talked a lot that night and he finally opened up that he was going abroad to do his masters. Fast forward to about 2 years after, he is back, done with his masters, we talked and still talk till today, iv been with other guys, I make him jealous and yet he hasn't said anything and even doesn't have a girlfriend. I love him more than I can control and im hoping he opens up soon. We haven't been seeing often coz we stay in different towns but when he came around, we still reconnected like before. Im as confused as u. He is the one I love and somehow, my heart is waiting for him. Im reading comments with you hoping I can get something tangible.
ReplyDelete(Please how do I get an ID?)
Poster 2 - be EXTEMELY careful with men who want to rush into marriage with you. Make sure your son never spends time alone with any toaster. Make sure your son is protected.
ReplyDeletethanks for all the comments, meanwhile the guy's mother is late
ReplyDeleteI like this ur advice Stella, u try
ReplyDeletePoster 2: ur low self esteem is so painful! My God! Did u read what u wrote?! No self-worth whatsoever! U are just 28 and so what if u have a baby?? Is thay why u should reduce ur valur like this?! Chai! Guys will use u anyhow and mistreat u if u dont wisen up and start loving urself and exuding some selfworth. One common guy is interested in u and ure acting like its the best thing that has ever happened to u? Acting so unworthy and ish....even if to say u have leprosy+AIDSxterminal diseas.....even pple with these conditions still find love. Nna men, i cringed so much reading ur post. U are obviously unexposed and closeminded.
ReplyDeletePlease carry urself with more confidence and selfworth to avoid people seeing u as a charity case and treating u anyhow!
Poster 1: when you read all the advice on this blog and from family and friends, in the end, it's your choice....Left to me, if u feel the need to ask for a definition of your relationship, then by all means, ask away.
ReplyDeleteSet the stage for it...check for the best time and environment,look at his mood and ask.
Poster 2: Do not look down on yourself because you already have a child and left a messy relationship. Look forward and stop having this low esteem mentality,please.
Stop talking yourself down infront of your man cos it will bounce back on you.
Sit your self down and think about it. Do you really care about him?
Also,you're the only one who knows if your man is sincere or not. You'll have a gut feeling, pray about it..ask for signs.
In the end, if you truly feel he'll make you happy, then say yes.
If you're looking older than him,simply work on your appearance through exercise, classy makeup , nice dress sense.
Don't think about what people will say because as long as both of you are on the same page and communication lines are open, it's all good. (Put God first)
I wish you the best.
Poster 1: this is very simple, IF A MAN WANTS TO BE WITH YOU, HE WOULD ASK YOU!!. that guy is obviously not sure if you are for keeps that's why he hasn't come out to say anything. Kindly start giving other guys your attention
ReplyDeletePoster 2: you are only 2 years older than him. I don't think it should matter..however, d fact u said he asked you where he could get a ring from, shows how immature he is. whether a 25 year old or a 30 year old man, NEVER date or marry an immature guy.