Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative.

OMG.I sent this poster a hug!

This Narrative is sent in for you to open your eyes and learn...especially to those of you who have seen but refuse to walk cos you keep hoping for a miracle.

So so sad!

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

CONFUSED,ANGRY AND BITTER OVER ABORTION THAT COST A TUBE

Stella Godbless this great work you are doing,to say I need advice from bvs may not necessarily be true because that is not the reason i'm sending this in. I keep reading chronicles daily and I keep learning from them but I must say I have been stupid in not been able to make a decision and stick to it.

my story is quite long but I would try to shorten it.i'm a young lady who graduated 2011 but I just started working in august.i have been in a relationship of 5years and it's been a bittersweet experience but something happened last year that changed my life forever.i got pregnant for my bf after countless abortions, this one stuck in my tube and I almost lost my life as it was ectopic which was caused by infections from previous abortions.

when it happened,i was so ashamed and felt my life was over as my mum was so disappointed(dad passed when I was 9yrs old and mum took care of 5 of us).she felt terrible because she felt she has failed and she has always insisted on no sex before marriage,though bf agreed to everything and paid the bills for the operation and even assured my mum he was going to marry me but things changed after that,i became more insecure as he never stopped cheating on me,got so bad I couldn't take it anymore (he's been cheating for 5yrs) and we took a break which lasted for 2months, I started another relationship and moved on but we later reconciled,he suspected nothing because we live in seperate towns,i still decided to open up to him about the other guy I dated(first time in 5yrs I would date someone else).

he pretended he wasn't angry until he asked that I buy a bottle of Jack Daniels to apologize for my actions which I felt was totally uncalled for because he has been cheating and not once even when caught did he apologize,i refused but still kept doing the little I can for things to work. my mum noticed things has changed between us and wanted to know why,i refused telling her so she sent for him,i pleaded with him to also not tell her anything but on his arrival,he poured everything to my mum in so much disrespect and disgust,even told her the number of times I had sex with the guy like I told him during my confession,‎and insists I don't greet him in our native language when I wake up (we are urhobo's).

He treats me like trash because I have lost a tube and he knows no man would want to marry a girl with one tube as there is no assurance of getting kids,i visited him with food items his mum requested I give to him,i used my cash to travel there as I was also attending a wedding that weekend,when I was about to leave,he refused giving me transport fare back home despite the fact that I told him we had family meeting that same day by11am,he bluntly refused,i left with just 500 naira in my hand to the park,unsure of how I would get home as it takes about 1500 to get to my house,i was lucky enough that while I was pleading with a driver explaining my situation to him,a woman heard me and gave me money to take me home,he later called that night to ask how I got home,when I told him,he just said ok,bye and ended the call.

2weeks ago I visited him and saw there was no food in his house,i went to the market with the 10k I had on me and prepared food,bought food stuffs and all,he is a graduate but unemployment has made him to take to his passion of fashion designing,i support him still though he isn't earning much,yet he doesn't have respect for myself and my family. 

I'm sending this in so some people may learn from my story because the signs were there but I was adamant,i thought things would change,he kept cheating with no remorse yet I kept sleeping with him and having abortions that has caused me my tube and now he has decided to further bring me low before my family,the moment he left my mum called me names for lying to her and for bringing myself down that low,how I am useless,how I keep opening my legs for men unlike my elder sister who is a virgin even @ 29.

God knows I haven't been with more than 4men in my life and he happens to be the 3rd,the 1st was almost like rape,the 2nd I dated in school before meeting my bf.now my mum thinks i'm so loose because that's how people look @ me because of how sharp I am compared to my sister who is the quiet type.my mum looks @ me with so much hate and pains right now I don't know what to do as she feels I have done nothing than constantly bring pains to her.she thinks I have brought shame and disgrace to her.

 I wish I can just open the ground n fall in right now, wish I can turn back the hands of time and not gone back into the relationship after the break,i wish I can just erase this pain,shame and hurt I feel right now, wish I took to Stella's advice I saw on another post asking the bv not to confess.

Now I know why women keep secrets and die with them.i wish I wasn't born into this society that applauds men that cheat and shame women who make mistakes and confess to them.i called his friend to tell him what bf did by coming to my house and the friend called me a fool for confessing,the friend is a married man.

This is my story, so many details of his actions to me was not attached but I believe some bvs would see this,learn and hopefully others would take a CUE on when to draw the curtain of that bad relationship they find themselves in..

Thanks Stella for the platform.

This Chronicle really made me sad.when i started reading i felt like sending you an E-slap but by the time i ended,I just wanted to hug you for your mistakes.

If your older sis is 29,you are a baby...OMG!

I feel sad and dont know what to tell you but send loads of love your way.God be with you and i hope when you are ready to settle down,God will send you a man that will accept you with one tube and if not,find your strength in God's love.