Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Monday LMAO!

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Monday, August 17, 2015

Monday LMAO!



196 comments:

  1. and who wrote all this?!...like seriously?..who be slave?

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    1. Do u think at all?...what's are ur duties as a wife?...are they not normal tins u shld do?...see as your face be sef, if u no try make up for ur ugliness wid things stated above, I can bet all my savings on it, yah husband go send u out!

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    2. Just tell us to die for our man

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    3. Even if y are not a wife material Clara Strive to be, doing 80% of these things would enhance a happy living

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    4. Hehehe How about the table turning, and men doing all that for their wife? Hehehe

      Your comment will be visible after approval

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    5. Hahahaha... Evn dangote's side chick won't do dt

      For ur captivatin short stories visit www.itsdidisblog.blogspot.com

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    6. Good write up but so much work to do these days.

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    7. This should be for full time house wives, because this is a full job.
      Who has the time?


      **lululiscious**

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    8. He does these for me, Buh in a total different way that u get to appreciate only when u read it out like this...

      #blessedme#

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    9. Na so, which man is worth all this stress? Abeg gimme juice and pounded yam to eat jare.

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    10. Lalallalalalala

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    11. What this article is saying is that, let ur life revolve around ur husband. Don't work too. Just please him because na pikin ur husband be. Mtcheeeeeeww! Rubish.

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    12. 8,9,10 I can do but the rest can be done by a woman that has no where to go.

      feeding him with the "nyonyo" is important.

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    13. Aunty, it's not slavery na
      If u love someone truly, twill mean nothing to u
      Ive done such b4 to a man and even though he messed up, I don't regret it one bit.
      I will do even more for my husband
      D man I will marry sha!!!
      I will make his life a living paradise
      Everyday will be like a dream
      Hmmmmmm!

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    14. @ anon14:35 deythereism

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    15. Pls pray tell as I'm doing all this for him what does he do for me????

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    16. Only a full-time housewife will be able to do this! Na full time job description be this. No working wife in this Lagos can have time abeg

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    17. After reading this, I had a different perspective and more so, I knw understand y I cannot av a smooth relationship. I just feel am not givn my boyfnd d dsired attention. It may not b all tru but certainly, it made sense.

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    18. Anon 14:35 you sound like a woman who men use and dump.

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    19. Anon 14:35,please flash me on this number. 07062824230.. You are a wife material.

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    20. Soooo........

      What do he do precisely?
      Give chop money and belle abi ?

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    21. I do??? @ anon 20:38
      Pls tell me more
      Hw u tke knw???
      Pls ooo
      I'm interested

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    22. It will interest you all that I do all these things for my husband and also take care of his kids from his late wife. I am enjoying my home and having the best fun of my life. If no one tells you, you can never tell that I didn't birth my step children. I practically live my life for all of us and I am a fulfilled woman. Thank you.

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  2. Nice write up. Sure a dedicated women does this.

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    1. I only understand 3, 6 and 9.......the others were written in German......i dont speak German.

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    2. They forgot to add "wipe his butt wen he poops" to d list...I don't know d kinda man dat wants to be spoon-fed like dis

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    3. I only understand 3, 6 and 9.......the others were written in German......i dont speak German.

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    4. I do all these for my dh and he does more for me. He washes my clothes (washing machine) for me, cooks for me, helps with cleaning the house and washing up dishes when im tired.

      Word to the single ladies, marry someone you would be happy to do all these and more for. Marriage is not a competition

      Eastwestern

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  3. Am not a Modern slave.... Mtcheeeeeew....

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    1. I wonder what your generation is gon look like

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    2. No wonder you're still single

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    3. Shut up your low self esteem modern day slave mouth!!! Yesss you Faith martins!! U are obviously a jobless human being! House girl!

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  4. That's if he's a cripple.

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    1. This is pure baby sitting

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    2. This is pure baby sitting

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    3. I wonder what your generation is gon look like

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    4. Even if he's crippled,i won't do any of this.

      See this poster sha,wanting to turn women into modern day slaves.
      If y'all women do this,who wld do urs?

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    5. Lmao @ that is if he is a cripple, the woman will still take care of the kids too coupled with all these.

      The list is not even exhaustive

      1. We should also be at alert and stay in the toilet whist our husbands pooh so we can clean him up since they are taaata.

      2. We should bath our husbands and brush their teeth.

      3.We should watch over them whilst they sleep with our eyes wide open.

      Since the woman is a super woman with super strength whilst the man suddenly becomes handicapped/ paralysed cuz he is married.

      Whirlwind

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    6. Maybe he's forrest gump.....or he's aultistic....

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    7. Maybe he's forrest gump.....or he's aultistic....

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    8. Whirlwind, you be original werey, I don laugh tire

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    9. Hahaha .This one is called suffocation at its peak. Odaro ngworo biko. Then when I finish this he will go out and do all for another woman .Akuko na egwu. Lol

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  5. After doing all these, the stupid men will still go out and look for another omoge.

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    1. Thats why alot of people are still stuck with mediocres.
      Do ur part and leave the rest. If u treat him good and he strays then its on him. But if u dont...its more like givin him an excuse

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    2. I pray we do it for d reasonable ones

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    3. @Loveme jeje... for real jare.

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    4. I agree with you @ Tuscanny, if you do all this things and he strays let his conscience judge him. I just pray we don't fall into wrong hands.

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  6. Easy to say, if only our men will learn how to do this things in return.

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  7. Replies
    1. No be small I dey come....

      Bwahahahahahahaha

      My belle oooo. When d man no dey crippled.

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    2. Don't mind all these ladies here pretending as if they are doing it. To be honest, no sane woman will do most of those trash.

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  8. Replies
    1. You are obviously not married. Men are babies. Once you get married put it at the back of your mind that your husband is your first child. Treat him as you would treat your child and your marriage would be blissful.

      Eastwestern

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    2. Men are not babies. They may be indulgent and crave attention like babies but they are not babies. A baby cannot be the head of a family. The Bible does not call husbands babies. African women will continue to carry last with this defeatist mentality.
      When I got married my hubby and his family came with this babies nonsense. 6 years later my hubby is the decisive, hardworking and very mature leader of our home.

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    3. Yes, men are babies but not handicapped. Except if you have a handicapped man @home, then you can be happy doing all those things because na ur choice. Let's be honest for once

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  9. THELMA ENEMUWE said...
    Who get time for al dis?
    This z a full time job mehn
    *faithful BV enemuwe thelma*

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  10. Everything shouldn't be a big deal except the ironing part, let the dry cleaner do that biko and every woman will be so glad to do just that if the men will appreciate it and display affection in return.

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    1. And y will u ask a grown ass man y he took so long in the toilet smh

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    2. I swear that ironing part, abeg!

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    3. Even blowing the hot food for him is not a big deal??

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  11. a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said..
    .
    Lawd knws i will not even allow my future wife do this to me bcos it feels weird though.... #NowPlaying>> shun it: shakez....
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

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    1. Today your signal is functioning well from Jupiter. Modern day slavery in the name of marriage. If this is the way marriage is then why should I get married. My mum does not do half of this but they have been married for 30yrs. Is he a baby? What of me? I need love, attention, and a lot of petting.

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    2. Loll@b
      His signal is functioning well

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  12. He will still cheat despite alm this!

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  13. Please what do I get in return after I do all this. This is a full time job,am I supposed to go to work,come back tired and do another work at home. Truly I don't mind this job, so far he pays me salary of N1m monthly.
    Most women wont mind or are already even doing 70percent of this, if the man is loving and gives you everythn you need. And if you do 100percent of this, good luck to you, but have it in mind, it doesn't mean he wont still have side-chick.

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  14. Lol. Not possible. why can't it be the other way round.

    ckjacob.blogspot.com for suspense stories.

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    1. I really hope u don't die single

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  15. When i can do things my self

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  16. Mtcheeeeeeew.
    Any man expecting dat from me must be high on a very strong weed.
    Wat rubbish.
    Den am practically living my life for de man. Mba nu.
    Wat will he do for me?

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    Replies
    1. You're a big fool,i pity u o

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  17. But that *nyonyo* part look like it will be sweet!

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  18. Except d man is deaf, dumb crippled, blind,......

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  19. So what will the husband do for his wife then? This is Slavery at its peak.

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  20. And all this girls be forming seriously, who b slave Ohya na wait till u reach 40 and u never get husband the one when you go manage get u go even polish him shoe join self... Nonese and they will be forming #walksawaywithzobomixedwithalomobitters

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    Replies
    1. Well
      GOD instructed men to live their wives...
      So if she is working hard to please he too is showing her love, relieving stress off her /makes things easier , discouraging her from over stressing herself and life easier for her

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  21. Abasi mmi, all dis for a man? choi, Nigerian women av suffered. It would av been fine if all dese tins keeps dem faithful and caring, unfortunately no, some men will stil mistreat the woman and cheat on her even wen she does all dese.

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  22. Lols @chick felix, only if he is a cripple indeed!

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  23. The man must be an overgrown baby. Mcheeew!!

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  24. Lol, help him dress. Is he a kid? After doing all these, you still call yourself his wife. Nah, you are his slave.
    Rubbish write up

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  25. hmmm - to those that have the strength.

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  26. Me nd my husband wil end up fighting bcoz he wil b lyk u send u all dis over sabi tin?, did I tell u dt I am a baby? U r very fragile go nd rest.... the nxt tin na 2 report me 2 my mama b dt . He said he can do all tins himself

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  27. hmmm - to those that have the strength.

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  28. Its truly a man's world,so the woman does not deserve pampering or special attention.
    What most men don't understand is that a woman is the best multiplying machine God ever made(not all o)...there is no way u respect a woman she won't worship the ground u walk on,treat her nice and she'll return the favour doubled,its even more evident in the very practical part of a man dropping less than 1tablespoonful of sperm and she gives u back an adorable child....enough of this "manliness" ,if u want to live like a king,treat her like a queen,she isn't ur slave!

    Happy wife,happy home!

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    Replies
    1. @ Meg, your comment is the best and most matured honest comment I have read so far.

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  29. I won't mind doing all that for the right man who will do the same for me.

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  30. Women don suffer oooo,chai!!

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  31. our men have turned to 1 year old babies. Ok ooo. stella can you do that.

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  32. Then what exactly will the man be doing?

    This kinda shit stifles me, allow me attend to my stuff my own way or if need be I can ask for your opinion and am at liberty to accept or discard them



    #suplexcity

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  33. ok chere ana m abia.

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  34. Well,its nt balanced if it's just women who do all the slavery work?hian...I come marry to suffer?
    Well he has to show me love for me to reciprocate..i'm sure I can go all out to make him happy too.

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  35. Am just wowing, no wonder he treats me like a queen coz I do half of those things listed.

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  36. If a woman does all these for her hubby on regular bases, see finish syndrome will definitely enter the marriage,which one the man go dey do?
    Smh

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  37. I do most of them already, for 10yrs now and I didn't even notice till I read this. It's no big deal at all. I guess the motherly instinct kicks in without one even noticing.

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    1. Lol..listen to yourself...."motherly instincts".....so u r now his mother abi?........"Mrs goody two shoes"......speak d truth and shame d devil

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    2. Lol..listen to yourself...."motherly instincts".....so u r now his mother abi?........"Mrs goody two shoes"......speak d truth and shame d devil

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    3. So you blow air on his food? Is he handicapped? E ya kpele

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  38. Any man that let's his woman do all this for him is an IMBECILE.

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    1. Any woman that doesn't do at least half of it for her man is an IMBECILE.

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    2. My dear Ehy, you will look at yourself one day and realise you are that imbecile.

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  39. Bwahhahahahaha!!!!
    Ok this takes the cake! ROTFL

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    Replies
    1. I need to join in this laughter

      Hahahahahahahohohohohehehehehekikikikihahahhahahahaha

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  40. Just simply shows how deeply modernity has eaten deeply into our roots. I mean how's this even too much a thing to do for someone you claim you love? yet women expect the men to do everything for them, even help them think with their own mind. Any woman that passes this test can hardly have issues in the home front (FACT) Call it modern slavery or whatever!

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    1. God bless you dear. Am a testimony that this makes the home peaceful and even makes him feel helpless without you around him.

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    2. How 'bout after pooping, i help u wipe ur bum......yea, a woman should do everything...i mean everything to have a happy home.....but some suggestions up there are just plain ludicruous.....like seeing him off to d bus station and waiting till d vehicle leaves EVERYFUCKINGDAY......it's good u do that sometimes..nt all d time....if it was he's personal car, then i'll gladly open d gate for u, watch u leave and close it bk.....not walking a mile everyday...somebody go thief u for road?...

      goin to scrub him when he's bathing everyday...onlyif we r in d bath together....

      Blow his meal....remind me hw many children i get again abeg...only REMOTELY possible if it's just us at d beginning.....not when d babies starts coming, with d sleepless nites and diapers to change

      Sex every night.....wow......just negodu
      In all this, is d woman going to be a housewife??? Cos if she's wrking, both of u will be rushing in d mornings.....who will hv time to sit n blow ur tea?.........the man described above must be a BiG BABY.......

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    3. You are joker, Infact a clown.If you are waiting or looking for a woman that will do all that for you, you go wait tire.Even a village wife won't do it.

      By the way , ,does your mother do all these for your father? What of your sisters that is if they are married?

      Whirlwind

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    4. Hahahahhaa how many men do anything for their women.

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    5. Don't mind the jokers. NO ONE'S mother did most of this trash here. Wash his hard to reach areas?! Like animals in the forest.
      If you are a woman and agree with this post then you need transgender surgery because you dont deserve womanhood.
      The societies where you see most of this stuff happening are the same that encourage men to marry 3 year olds and stone women who wear trousers.

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  41. Sounds good but not easy @ all. Dotting on a grown man!!!

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  42. What will husbands now do for their wives ooo, when it is the woman doing everything. I'm sure some mothers did not do half of these things to their sons and the men will want to be treated this way. #aintgotnotimeforiranu

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  43. I think I read d sarcasm in d post. Dunno how y'all missed it.

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    1. I know right... did too!

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    2. Lol. I can't thank you enough for this comment. The fact that people r even taking it seriously shows how ridiculous expectations in marriage are

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    3. Lol. I can't thank you enough for this comment. The fact that people r even taking it seriously shows how ridiculous expectations in marriage are

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    4. At first I read sarcasm but ignoring it is far more interesting.

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    5. Thank the Lord! I was only reading the comments in search that there was at least just 1 person! Just 1!
      I've noticed that a lot of Nigerians don't understand sarcasm.
      Kind of the scary the amount of men and women abusing the few that say they can't go by that list. Some are even saying that they do all of that! What the hell is going on!?
      I understand, each to their own. But really, you think a good wife is one that blows her husbands hot food before he puts it in his mouth!? And there are husbands that request or allow this!?
      I don't even want to go into all the points mentioned above. Wow. Just wow

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  44. What will husbands now do for their wives ooo, when it is the woman doing everything. I'm sure some mothers did not do half of these things to their sons and the men will want to be treated this way. #aintgotnotimeforiranu

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  45. And the husband will do what exactly?

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    1. Don't worry about what husband will do,play your part!

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  46. That kin thing...stressing my wife like that? This one na "hubby sitting" an advanced form of baby sitting.

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    1. Don't you know you are a baby that can't eat, sleep or wash your bum

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  47. Which kind nice write up, if we re to do all this what would they be doing? Re we slaves?

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  48. Hmmm I kept waiting for the punchline. Dunno if this person is serious or being facetious.

    This na real full time job. Only a house wife with no kids can do all this haba.

    Lol at blow on his food. How about clean his ass with warm baby wipes after he takes a shit. Put talcum powder on his nether regions and his neck when it's hot change his nappies regularly. Make sure he is securely strapped into his buggy. :-D, :-D

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    Replies
    1. Hahaha, some some women will have to include pampers in their monthly shopping, lmao

      Whirlwind

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  49. This is not love neither is it a way of showing care to your man. By doing every single thing on that list, you'll only end up choking your man. He's going to need his own space..
    I'm sure the writer can't even do 10% of what is written there.....

    I hate ironing

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  50. Akuko, Mr and Mrs no de heaven o.

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  51. Nice writeup.this is a very good remedy to a good man's heart,not all dis betrayals out There

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  52. Lord I need strength help me to be the most outstanding wife anyman can ask for and bless me with that man that will make me go on my knees everyday thanking you for the beautiful soul you brought my way!

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  53. If wifey does all these, she will age faster n hubby will end up marrying sisi caro to handle other matters. Abeg na helpmate wife supposed to be n not a slave.

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  54. So what will the man do now?

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  55. Trust me,no sane man wants this. A woman does all dis for her child and not a grown ass man

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  56. Hahahahahahahaaa, Stella o. @ make he no go out again cracks my ribs. Ok, do another post vice versa

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  57. Rubbish. These women will keep being treated as second class citizens until they learn to stand up for themselves. Just imagine, blow his food for him?smh

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    Replies
    1. The writer is just being sarcastic.

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    2. Nigerians do not understand sarcasm. What a shame.

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  58. Grace of God to do dis is be released (except ironing) in Jesus name

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  59. WTF! I thought he is my husband not my freaking child. Even children will be like "Mum keep your distance you're choking me:.

    Lawd hammercy!

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  60. Oh Lordy!
    'Nyonyo'

    This was my word for vagina when I was little.
    Didn't know people used it.
    Guess I learnt it from somewhere then.


    As to the post, most of the stuff written in there is BS.

    Why will I be checking up on hubby when he's in the toilet?

    Or helping him wash where his hands can't reach?
    Na dwarf?

    Help him blow his food indeed.
    As blow dryer na.

    Abegi


    #WhiteDiamondOut

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  61. Only a Mad dumb woman with inferiority complex does this.

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  62. I do most of these. I don't iron his clothes tho.

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  63. Slavery is what I see here not showing love or affection. The man will turn the wife to foot mat. Submissiveness is not stupidity or mumuish.

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  64. I don't know what men feel like.

    But truth be told, we are all equal before God.

    What if is the man should do all these things, will he die? so a woman doesn't deserve to be treated like this.

    Well dear writer,my hubby is the one that irons our clothes for work, church, and social functions. atyms he puts water for me to bath. Is not that he stupid, No!! because he knows it was a woman that gave birth to him and I as well I treat him well the way a lovely and caring wife should. Is a two way thing. Husband and Wife are 'TEAM'.

    Dear writer, pls do us a favour and never post such rubbish again becuase your write up shows and explains clearly the kind of man you are. QED.

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  65. I don't know what men feel like.

    But truth be told, we are all equal before God.

    What if is the man should do all these things, will he die? so a woman doesn't deserve to be treated like this.

    Well dear writer,my hubby is the one that irons our clothes for work, church, and social functions. atyms he puts water for me to bath. Is not that he stupid, No!! because he knows it was a woman that gave birth to him and I as well I treat him well the way a lovely and caring wife should. Is a two way thing. Husband and Wife are 'TEAM'.

    Dear writer, pls do us a favour and never post such rubbish again becuase your write up shows and explains clearly the kind of man you are. QED.

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  66. If you don't do it,someone else will and that will be your loss. I enjoy taking care of my hubby this way,the only thing i don't do on the list is iron his clothes.. I was at the verge of losing my marriage and when we both visited a marriage counsellor my husband complained about me not doing most of these things & that i was giving all the attention to our daughter. That was the day i realized men are real babies. Its almost a year now that i started doing those things and honestly things have changed for the best in my marriage. It brought out the sweetest part of my hubby i never knew existed.

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    Replies
    1. So you wash his ass, blow on his food, see him off every day with your jobless self but you draw the line at ironing? Ok.
      Just be aware that just because you're doing what makes him happy does not mean you're doing the right thing.

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    2. Awwww. All because he wants you to check on him when he goes to do a poo. Wow.

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    3. If your husband is your best friend then doing all these shouldn't be a problem at all. In fact you'll do it with so much joy.

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  67. Hmmm if I hear

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  68. Chai... that kind woman ehn.. if I hear say she be Nigerian! But of a truth, these were wat our mothers, and grandmothers did that made their marriages last. A lady doesn't need to do all of the above, just a few, and I bet DH go love you die. For me sha... that last point odi kwa very necessary.

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  69. Who go come take care of my pickin? Abegi he should rest somewhere

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  70. Let's be realistic, no sane grown ass man will be comfy with these...even a child will outgrow this trash!...Gdlk to d slaves hu'd go ahead n do it

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  71. Gees! Do you want to suffocate the man?

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  72. Nonsense write up**** all these insecure women and men with stupid ego should stop passing around these rubbish shit write up.what kind of stupid shit is this biko.stop encouraging these men with all these abeg.

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  73. This what calaber girls used to do and their men leave their entire lives in their hands and ppl say na o by ogwu. Nothing like love portion other than your attitude to your husband. But such things are rare to nonexistent because our today's ladies are asking first what do I get if I do these things and why shouldn't it be the man to these for me. Check responses and I bet you will see. Love is what you give or do toale the other happy without thinking of what you get first or in return. Who accepts that definition of love today?

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    1. No, we work too so that nonsense up there is only practicable for a jobless person. Do you get???? Your wife will get back from work tired as a human being, give you food and you still expect to blow it Cuz it is hot?
      Is the man an imbe??

      Whirlwind

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  74. I can do that only if he's an imbecile or dangote.

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  75. Lwkmd... I just can't stop laughing oo! Choi! All these until marriage? I just don't get. Whoever wrote this can keep it up. No b force na. Lolzzz.
    Ewu !

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  76. Biko biko biko, wait o! The women that claims they do these, do you do these having a maid or without a maid? Abeggi!

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  77. There is no big deal in doing the things listed above. I do most of them no wonder hubby attains to me sharperly wen am forming weakness

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  78. Wow! I didn't realize I do most of these for hubby until I read thru.he feels very happy and proud to be married bcos I take care of him like a baby down to packing his lunch and even arranging the cloths he wears to work..
    Nw that am pregnant he does them for me happily... Marriage is indeed beautiful

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    Replies
    1. Come back and say all this after you give birth and he demands for the same care as the baby. He's a baby after all.

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  79. Errrm!!!! You want that from me??? Hmmm www.xperiang.com is asking ooooo

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  80. IS HE CRIPPLED?

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  81. PD Young Billionaire17 August 2015 at 17:35

    There is no way the woman won't look older than the man if she does all these.Women are not slaves!

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  82. No be small thing. I think its for full time housewives.

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  83. God!Look at the kind of women u created for us to marry.If is possible, these women are ready to claim to be the husbands.imagine simple things that these so called pompous and arrogant women find difficult to do!Oh my God, it's better to remain single than to marry any of these women above ooo.No be my side self,one indiscipline and stupid woman will come and stay,she will rather go back to her father's house to do that rubbish,not my house, bcoz what of children do u think such women will train for the society? Children that can't be submissive right?
    Make God help all men out there and the responsible and caring women too.

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    Replies
    1. @ismail,no mind all these stubborn women wey full this blog. They want a loving caring husbands. But to do just simple things that don't require much energy na wahala for them.

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    2. We are so busy stretching neck to see what the women will do for men
      That we don't reflect a day understand that a REAL man's responsibilities match a woman's in number and even surpass

      Delete
  84. for house wife only

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  85. How many women here will do that?

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  86. Who does mine....

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  87. i just kinda noticed something here... most or some of the women commenting are not married or in a serious relationship, if you see your man as your baby and your man sees you as his baby... its a jolly good relationship... time might not permit you to do it all in a day but a few is enough.... if you think this is wrong, try it, if you are in a serious relationship oo, but if you are just the panched type forget it, even God will not make it work for you.

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  88. WHAT ABOUT THE MAN TREATING HIS WIFE LIKE A QUEEN,HELPING HER AND SUPPORTING HER WHEN SHE NEEDS HELP ESPECIALLY AROUND THE HOME. A WIFE IS DIFFERENT FROM A SLAVE OR HOUSE HELP. BY THE WAY I BELIEVE SLAVERY WAS ABOLISHED A LONG TIME AGO.

    ReplyDelete

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