Are you one of those who believe in 100% honesty in relationships or you think that some secretes should follow you to the grave?
In the first school of thought,Most believe that men/women cannot be trusted to handle some 100percent revelations no matter how much they try to so this school of though keeps 50 percent and reveals 50 and it works out for them until the past comes calling...
The second school of thought believes that one must come to equity with clean hands so they reveal all to the person they are about to marry,leaving them with the option of walking away or staying...These ones know where they stand from the beginning and when the past comes calling,it does no harm to them...
I've seen cases where a marriage was called off because the lady disclosed that she has had abortions before. I've also seen a case where a lady canceled her marriage when her fiancé disclosed to her the amount of sexual partners he's had in d past.
So what's your take?
Should we say that anyone that bails out on you for being 100% honest with them doesn't deserve you? What if they find out those things later?
Full disclosure in relationships, yay or nay?
Nay
ReplyDeleteIt is not possible for a man to no how many men U've slept wiv in ur life time. Every Nigerian girl says 4 at most not counting one night stands, sugar daddies and orgies. So keep that a secret!. Another secret u should keep is some family issues. Any other thing can be said.
DeleteI will only let them know the basics. Like if I have a kid,medical history,some family gist. Won't tell any man about my past relationships unless in a particular situation
DeletePlease oooh,some secret should follow you 2 grave biko.
DeleteJust confess 2 God and let it be.
Nay Nay Nay
DeleteI can never try try it in my life again,it doesn't pay @all,the one I tried where did it lead me to?? I was almost killed!
DeleteFull disclosure ke.... I won't try it. Been dear done that . African men will use it to judge u till u die.
DeleteBody count ...3
Abirtion ...no
Married men...no
Slept with a woman ..no
Slept with someone u weren't dating ..no
Double dated..no
Dated for money ..no
How much I earn...salary/2
Given a man a head... Screams never then pukes
Let me stop before my body counts will decode me
BLOG ANALYSER: No! Everybody keep ur secrets to ur self. It means half disclosure! Infact polish some to suit u if u can. The heart of man can never be revealed.
DeleteHell no.
DeleteIt's good to keep them wondering. Even though my fone is extra clean I still password it so he is always wondering : is she? Or isn't she?
Buahahahaha
My account details na only me and my spirit know am.
That information won't prolong his life so no need for him to know it.
*winks
Full disclosure is always better and safer. If u wont accept me 4 what i have done in the past before i met u then you dont deserve me.
DeleteWhat happens when u lie and then after marriage truth comes out? U lose it all at that stage. Imagine u dating sm1 that used to do runs and she was open...though it wld be hard to trust but also the onus is on her to prove that shes changed and has eyes 4 just u, then sm1 comes and tells u about her past, u can either lie that she isnt or say yes, i know she was and i accepted her like that. But imagine she claimed innocent, even if u r married to her, shes gonna go thru hell vos sm1 like me wld make her miserable.
I give God the glory for my life, no hidden agenda that my partner cannot know about. But I think so men can't deal with it if ladies with bad past fully reveal it.
Delete*Larry was here*
Psychologically, our society impacts on us, and the act of being judgmental is prevalent in our society, so we have a lot of judgmental people today and anything we say out to such a person would lead to a whole dimension of wild predictions. They'll judge you for that act and even imagine so much more based on what they've heard......so on this basis, I think we need to know our spouses better and selectively reveal our dark secrets depending on the perception/mindset of our spouse.
DeletePersonally, I am open and free so I can take in quite a chunk of dark secrets but I obviously would have a threshold especially when it comes to betrayal. So I think its dependent on your spouse. Pple should learn to MARRY RIGHT, so you'll know and predict the response from your spouse not all dem marriages we are witnessing dese days that are contracted for material and all oda selfish reasons.
Li-yon Vls.
None of the above....... Lol
DeleteI'm completely against full disclosure in relationshipa - one can use what he knows against you. Some peoe are very funnh and they can change overnight - make sure you use wisdom as it applies!!!!
DeleteAnon 16:51 Buhahahaha
DeleteTuscany....thank God say u no be God, imagine you saying u will give someone hell because of their past....my brother u have rights over your actions the next person's reaction is their own right...what if u act by giving her hell and she reacts by leaving your sorry ass...my brother wake up....u are only human
DeleteNay Nay Nay..was forming gud gurl n lost d guy I luved.Abeg lv mata o!
Delete#Had to comment for d 1st tym*winks
There are somethings u can't keep secret!
DeleteThere are somethings u naturally won't even find the words to say. They just bury themselves naturally where they should stay
Pls open up to ur partner its very important.....if u hide like cat,I swear u go cry like monkey cuz person wey like u go surely standa 4u no mata d gbege wey u don cause wit ur jerusalem(vaginal) or ur pipe(dick)#Mc Pinky again#
DeleteYes I feel there should be full disclosure in marriiage especially, so your partner knows wat tthey are getting iinto and whenever it comes back to bite u in d ass, it won't affect ur rshiip cos ur partner already knws
ReplyDeleteI stupidly nd foolishly did abortions abt two with my stupid boyfriend then. Thank God I have asked for forgiveness nd I am free now. Better don't judge me!! U are not God! suddenly afta my wedding with hubby he was asking me if I ever did I denied it vehemently. Now its bin a year nd half of marriage no children. I just thank God I didn't tell him even though I almost did, but he claims he knows a secret abt me trust sharp babe nah I can never agree to it. If ever the stupid boy friend tries it I will denial it like kilode
DeleteAnons hmmmmm.
DeleteAnon, your husband already knows. Stories go around. Especially if your ex was a loud mouthed fool.
DeleteI think it depends really and I would tell you why. When I met my husband then as a bf/gf thing then I told him I had an abortion previously. We talked about the reason why and etc. fast forward we got married and I got pregnant, went for my usual routine scan and the sonography said something was wrong inside, nothing major. She kept talking to me as she was doing her checks and my husband was sitting right next to me and also watching the screen. Suddenly the sonography asked me if I had ever had an abortion. I said yes, then she said ok that explains it. Then she talked about what she had noticed but it wasn't a big deal but they would need to keep an eye on me and she offered me an extra scan before my next routine appt/scan.
DeleteNow imagine , if I hadn't disclosed that to my hubby. I obviously needed extra medical attention and lying wouldn't have gotten me anywhere assuming I hadn't told him earlier on in our relationship. Well it's not like I disclose my whole life to him o, even now I dey code well but there are somethings that are really not worth hiding . It's more like a case of take it or leave it. The truth might be bitter but it has to be said!
Anon, you know doctors can tell if you have had abortion before, right? So if your husband insist you go do a test and the doctors starts to ask series of questions and one of it will be have you ever had an abortion and you lie again and he finds out its contrary, would you say the doctor is lying if he shares the result of the test and findings with your husband based on your consent? I'm a woman and abortion should be on the list of things your spouse needs to know before marriage. You owe him that much. (1) abortion (2) knowledge of a baby (3) divorced or widowed (4) murder be it found guilty or not (5) alcohol or paraphernalia dependence (6) filed for bankruptcy (7) victim of sexual abuse - this is important because victims carry mental trauma of this all through their life's that inhibit certain capabilities in their life be it ability to fully love or ability to trust or ability to perform well during sex or whatever, every victim has one traumatizing effect that they deal with; (8) any forms of STD, Not just your regular HIV/AIDs but HPV if you know about it, chlams or gonorhea; so let your soon to be husband or wife know ahead of time. For me, as a woman, if I have had any of these issues in my past, we will talk about it and I'll give you the option to tell me yours. Some men can take it, some can't; but they have the right to know.
DeleteI am blind in one eye I never told hubby. These days I get scared should I tell him
Delete@annon abortion No matter what don't ever disclose it. Denial it ooooo. My dear experience is the best teacher. A guy I did it for ended up telling every one. When we broke so u can imagine. men are useless.
DeleteSome secrets are worth taking to the grave
ReplyDeleteVery true. Rather than tell him/her, I will use that time to fry akara and dash my neighbours.
DeleteI agree. Men aren't emotionally mature enough to handle some secrets.
DeleteGbam!!!
DeleteDear Nigerian men. Please continue to be polygamous in nature. More than 50% of these hos aren't worth shit
DeleteNay! Some secrets should follow u to the grave abeg! Hmm experience is d best teacher!
ReplyDeleteNay
DeleteWat if they come knocking on your door later on
DeleteNay
DeleteDeny!deny!deny! @ felish
DeleteHMMM NO FUL DSCLOSURE TO AFRICAN MEN....TOMJERRYSWIT
ReplyDeleteA lot of men can't handle d truth,...I don't need to know ur body count,wetin I wan take am do?...I don't care who u've slept with b4 as long as u r not goin to sleep with him again...however,I need to know some little things about ur past cos I wldnt wanto be unpleasantly surprised in d future...I wanto know if u don do abortion b4 n I expect u to tell me d truth.I don't have problem with it as long as u don't have complications while doing it...if he doesn't ask,don't tell.if he does,tell d whole truth.
DeleteAs a guy,I tell anyone I'm dating all d tins I've done b4 n when I cheat I tell later (except on one occassion)
And pls,who's dat lady in white monostrap dress with flower prints in d 2nd unofficial party pic?....I like u. So much hype for d lady in red(she's fine though) but i'l choose d lady in black (beside her) over her 100 times
DeleteLady in white monostrap dress= Bloglord
DeleteLady in black= general's wife.
Lady in red= Charismatic diva
Liar u say so far she has no complications.... Men cannot control emotions... Full disclosure is not necessary especially abortions.. I told my hubby I had 3 abortions and when years later no child even despite getting pregnant and miscarrying he still had the guts to blame it on the abortions... This is someone who also made girls abort before marriage.... Me I knew I had become born again, repented of my past so was confident God had forgiven and would make me a mother.... Thank God today I have lovely twin girls. The human mind is judgemental so it's best to keep something's to yourself... Only repent of such sins to God and u only tell when u need to make restitution... Body count is a no no, u have a kid, previous marriage, impotence, HIV etc an absolute yes..
DeleteHMMM NO FUL DSCLOSURE TO AFRICAN MEN....TOMJERRYSWIT
ReplyDeleteYep! To African men especially...
DeleteI did good girl and told my ex somethings past things about me, when the chips were down he used everything I told him against me... Chei!
Now, I keep my past in my past...
If you wanna love me, love me for who I am to you and not who I was or what I did...
HMMM NO FUL DSCLOSURE TO AFRICAN MEN....TOMJERRYSWIT
ReplyDeleteExactly o
DeleteGbam!!!!
DeleteGbamest!!!
DeleteNnaaayyyyy!!!!!
ReplyDelete80% disclosure IMO
I av secrets that I'm taking to the grave with me.
I think I'm for nay, even tho boyfy knows all my dark secrets and still loves me, who's to say he won't use it against me in d future. So I'd rather u take some secrets to d grave but be very sure they are d kind of secrets that won't pop out eventually.
ReplyDeleteExactly. If they are the kind of secrets that won't pop out eventually. Cos if they do, na casala be that.
DeleteBut on the other hand I feel it's better to let it all out. For example, the lady that narrated her rape ordeal few days back, she cursed the guy that raped him and his entire generation. Now that same guy will get married to someone else and when they start having problems, the wife would not know where the problems are coming from. So it's good to let it out so that your partner knows what him/her is getting into, that's if he/she decides to continue with the relationship/marriage.
Thumbs up.
DeleteThey always use it against you.
Nay
DeleteNo need for full disclosure. He will use it against you. Afterall this blog don teach us many things.
ReplyDeleteNay
ReplyDeleteNay to the nay, infact nay nay! Ogini, I have a loud mouth but you see anything that would. Jeopardize my relationship/marriage it better go with me to the grave, if you find out good for you if you don't good for you still. Nothing like 100percent honesty in this ogbodo naija we dey so, especially this our generation.
ReplyDeleteNay! Some secrets are best taken to the grave
DeleteNay.it wil be used against later,for now hush up and repent,ask God for forgiveness and move on
ReplyDeleteSome stuff are best left buried. My own. This is dependant on what the stuff is.
ReplyDeleteFull disclosure in relationship, yay, but it depends on how deep the relationship must have gotten to...
ReplyDeleteWe no go dey for the question of, what's your favourite colour, you go come dey expect full disclosure o....issorait!
Sme pple like using honesty against other pple and it's bad..it takes a lot for someone to open up,dont take it for granted!
DeleteFull disclosure?? YAY..cos I don't want a BABY MAMA....I CNT deal abeg.
ReplyDeletebaby mamas can cuss me out.I DONT CARE.No be me do u
Nay,for ladies not all things should be discussed in relationships or marriage some secrets should be kept in d heart,a womans mind is an ocean of deep secrets,not everything about u should be divulged to a man cos a day will come when he will use those things u told him against u.my own opinion
ReplyDeleteI agree with you 100%. Never ever tell a man everything, he will use it against you in the future.
DeleteI'm married, but I've dated married men in the past. Will I ever tell my husband this detail? Never! I have double dated in the past, and had two or three boyfriends at a time. I will never tell my husband.
Many things are better left unsaid. Ladies, full disclosure is NOT the way to go.
Your husband has also possibly done things he will never tell you about either.
Marriage has got enough issues on its own already!
I'll chill and read comments cos full disclosure can sometimes backfire
ReplyDeleteI use to when i thought my ex was truthful but not now,i cant even trust no one
ReplyDeleteI love to be honest to my partner! But it doesn't help matter times, well its good sha! Cus I always av nothing to hide nd cover
ReplyDeleteI pity u@bose
DeleteYay for my recent relationship....nay for my ex
ReplyDeleteI think I will say yay to the second school of thought
ReplyDeleteDisclosure... I will say YES..cos .I can tolerate everything..But I cnt tolerate baby mama o.if u tell me u av multiple abortions sef...I will still love u.But say u carry person pikin? to my house? NEVER
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteM-amie gurly, I won't stop loving u. Even tho I see all ur write up as false, I just feel u wanna mk us laff and bask.
Deleteyay for me....coz telling the truth is way better than finding stuff out
ReplyDeleteGod bless u my dear... you go live long.. Chai... gals no get fear of God anymore. Y won't u take ur past to the grave wen ur past even shocks d devil... no morality, and honesty anymore in ds age. Yes... we all av a past.. buh c'mon, we all owe it to God, and to ourselves to b honest wt our spouses before any kind of engagement. If the spouses can't take it, no big deal...move on... it wasn't met to be... a better one will come along. No lady owe me her past, buh she does owe me to b honest wt her past.
DeleteIt takes brute courage, n total fear of God for a lady to be honest to a guy abt her past, and those r d characters I look out for in a lady...unfortunately, such characters r fast getting extinct.
I'd rather marry a gal who opened up to say she'v had x abortions, dated y men, had z flings- cos I kno there is nothing such a gal can hide frm me ever again, than marry a gal that claims she's had sex wt jus one man.
The Devil I kno is better than Angel I dnt.
And to all u gals taking ur pasts to d grave, dnt b shocked wen u find out ur DH had worse past- u cudnt av dealt wt, in d Afterlife.
life isn't fair...buh sometimes it is
Okezi, well said.The truth they say will set you free.If he/she won stay fine if nit, the bus station never reach.
DeleteMy opinion is "Nay". Men cannot handle the truth, they will at one point in your marriage use this secret/ confession against you. Abeg, my belle no be for food alone" anything that is meant to be a secret remains so forever. No be only honesty.
ReplyDeleteNah Nah Hell Nah! Some shit are better left buried.
ReplyDeleteYay, I trust my man
ReplyDeleteEveryone has a secret they will never share with anyone no matter d love... I won't lie to my partner for any reason cos he has a way of making me tell him... And yes I don't care if he does same... it's honesty all d way for me.
ReplyDeleteSomethings should be kept ohh biko I don't have power
ReplyDeleteNay! No matter how much I love a man, there are certain secrets he will not hear from me, mostly bc he has no need for them. Most times, its best to keep your secrets to yourself. No one else can keep them better than you. Even the secrets of your family and siblings are supposed to be left out of your marriage bc during those times when it seems like love in a marriage has depreciated, those secrets will be used against you. I wouldn't want a man to also tell me everything about him, except if it concerns and can affect me in the union.
ReplyDelete100% honesty!Yay....
ReplyDeleteI don't know y I just like u, reading your comments most especially. No hard feelings o
DeleteNot everything in life is meant to be talked about. As long as the secret doesn't affect your partner in anyway, i don't see why you should spill unless you are asked specific questions regarding the subject, in which case you have no option but to come clean. Apart from this, the past should remain in the past where it belongs, except again, for those past that ain't really the past, and will always remain in your present and future in the form of a child. I don't see why my body counts or abortion should matter to my spouse, except of course there are complications that resulted from my actions that i know will definitely affect my future and that of my partner.
ReplyDeleteNAY NAY NAY
ReplyDeletewell well well some secrets can't just be revealed... take it to the grave after all we all got past and PAST should be in the past.
ReplyDeleteand if it comes back to bite your ass, forgiveness is allowed.
Whatever we take to the grave will plague us on the other side. Its not worth it.
ReplyDeleteNay for me. Some secrets are better off not let out...
ReplyDeleteNay! From experience full discosure hasn't been some helpful. I tried to do better pikin but if I am to take back the hands of time I could have kept quiet.
ReplyDeleteStella nay ooh.. disclose ke? To dis 'unloyal' naija men? Ifa hear..
ReplyDeletewomen never disclose the amount of sexual partners uv had or abortions.
ReplyDeleteMen have a way of using it against you during arguments, na dere way biko.
We were 1nce having discussion abt abortion while watching a film, na so my fiancé ask me weda I don do before. I answered offcourse not. Knowing fully well iv done 3 over d yrs, dou when I was younger. Bcos I always tell him if I mistakenly fall pregnant for him im keeping d child. cant be aborting at age 30, and he's ok with it.
Let future not cum and babies are not easily coming, my dear dat lady is done for. D man will say cos u aborted, and inform his mother sef.
So pls abortions and sexual partners, keep it to yourself. No man wants to know if uv slept with more than 3guys. Keep it to 3abeg, it will save ur r'lshp/marriage. If you like tell him 15/20 and see how his face will change after hearing that information, meanwhile he's done like 50.
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said..
ReplyDelete.
No secrets.....
.
.
***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
See finish in any kinda relationship isn't good. Keep somethings to yourself!
ReplyDeleteNay..I've learnt to leave well enough alone!
ReplyDeleteNAY NAY NAY,take ur secrets to d grave biko. i cant shout
ReplyDeleteSomethings are better left unsaid
ReplyDelete80% yay...20% nay
ReplyDeleteWhen you're honest some will take you for granted.
ReplyDeleteNayyyyyyyyy Nehi Nehi human mind is 98% judgemental even if the person doesn't say it out deep down there are some reservations and perceptions already formed
ReplyDeleteIf it's something that when it comes out in the open, will be nasty or shameful, yay.
ReplyDeleteIf it's something unnecessary, nay.
I believe in equity with clean hands though.
#WhiteDiamondOut
Yay!!! Any secret u take to the grave will surely take u to hell.There is absolutely nothing to hide.NOTHING BEATS HONESTY.The truth sets free.
ReplyDeleteNay, because some people can't handle the truth.
ReplyDeleteYay
ReplyDeleteI SAY NAY... DISCLOSURE SHOULD BE TO AN EXTENT. YOU SHOULD ONLY DISCLOSE ON THE FOLLOWING CONDITIONS;
ReplyDelete-- IF THERE IS A POSSIBILITY OF IT POPPING UP IN THE FUTURE
-- IF IT WILL AFFECT YOUR SUPPOSED SPOUSE OR RELATIONSHIP NEGATIVELY
-- IF THERE IS A POSSIBILITY THAT YOU COULD BE BLACKMAILED IN THE FUTURE
THE TRUTH IS, SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID. IT COULD DIMINISH TRUST/LOVE IN A RELATIONSHIP, OR COULD BE USED AGAINST YOU BY YOUR SPOUSE. EVERYBODY DEY SHIT BUT NA WHO THEM CATCH FOR THE ACT NA IM OWN SMELL PASS. THERE ARE VERY FEW WHO WILL STICK TO YOU EVEN WHEN YOU'RE A MESS. THAT KIND OF LOVE IS SO RARE NOW. EVERYONE HAS BAGGAGE AND DO NOT WANT MORE THAN THEY CAN CARRY.
I REPEAT, SOME DISCLOSURE AIN'T NECESSARY. ****LADY DD***
nay ,nay and nay.i have a secret i cant even tell my mum not to talk of a spouse thar can drop me like am hot.
ReplyDeletenay ,nay and nay.i have a secret i cant even tell my mum not to talk of a spouse thar can drop me like am hot.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteif there is one thing the femi seyi ishamel versus nmasinachi fiasco taught us, its that you should NEVER reveal all your secrets to your boyfriend/toaster. Look at how the useless guy embarrassed the girl with information she had told/given him in confidence when the going was good. Shine your eye when you are in love. Men are terrible. They will definitely use the information you told them against you when things are no longer rosy
ReplyDeleteYou are right. Even if he didn't reveal it on the blog ( I missed that episode though..gossip mind flipping in) but he used it against her in real life, it shows he isn't God's purpose for her,so, he leaves her, his loss.But if she still does same to another guy who doesn't come on blogs to spew rubbish about secrets meant to be btw him and her or use it against her in real life now or in the future, God's will for her, he stays, his gain.
DeleteBottom line, YAY,YAY and YAY for honesty in every relationship. !
Yes ooo
ReplyDeleteI can't deal with secrets. It comes out one way or the other.
Its better you say all that is needs to be said on time than deal with it later.
Truth is, in most cases the couples involved are better off not knowing the truth because its hard to handle.
What can you do?
My own relationship goes for yay
Some people don't deserve honesty but I am always honest in all my relationships/situationships.
ReplyDeleteNay! Keep some to urself. How many of our past comes calling. Is our lives Nigerian movies. There are lots of things we've done dat we have not been able to forgiven ourselves and u expect a total stranger to forgive u and see it as ur past.
ReplyDeleteIt's a nay for me... when God is there for me to confess my sins and secrets to. I'll take some secrets to my grave.
ReplyDeleteSome things are better left unsaid. I'll rather take some secret to d grave.
ReplyDeleteNay. .... Stella. African men can't be trusted and I have an experience on it.
ReplyDeleteIts not even a matter of keeping secrets. sm things are better left unsaid
ReplyDeleteIts nt worth it.. They always use it against you later
ReplyDeleteyah for me at the beginning, but nay for me when married
ReplyDeleteHell nay! As humans we abuse the 100% transparency entrusted with us. Somethings should be left untold such as dirty family issues, number of sexual partners, abortion etc. I've seen scenario where the spouse brings up the past to insult the other whenever there is a misunderstanding.
ReplyDeleteNay!!!Some men are over grown babies.They can't handle some informations so it's better to lock up.
ReplyDeleteNAY.. Disclose wetin? A Lot is following me to the grave. My bf's new neighbour was my Aristo when I was in school, how will I tell him that? Thank God the man is very understanding. NAY NAY NAY
ReplyDeleteTi e ba e oo.
DeleteIf u re getting married to a pastor, yes. But if he's not religious or God fearing, don't! Cos d day he will cuss ur generations out with whatever u tell him, even Stella go laugh u n cuss u out! Confess to God abeg!
ReplyDeletePastor ke??? What makes him different from other men? They r even worse
DeleteNay.. I think information should be shared on a need to know basis
ReplyDeleteI don't have any secrets. Hubby knows all that needs to be known about me.
ReplyDeleteLife is too short to be burdened and afraid of a secret sin .
No to full disclosure.
ReplyDeleteNobody can be trusted.
The line btw love and hate is very thin.
That man that you think loves you dearly might change and start spilling.
Use your head.
Yes,the worst part is wen ur partner finds out the truth from an outsider,so its better to b truthful.@ms gemini,i didnt sign out,bcos i wanntd to go anon,am not part of d pple dat has two face on a blog,where dey carry matters to heart.it was a mistake,bsides to d Glory of God,d only person i fear in my life is the ALMIGTHY GOD.i can only respect pple u get?dnt have to go anon,to say my mind.only cowards do dat.i only asked innocently cos i tot we were family here.
ReplyDeleteSome things are better left unsaid.
ReplyDeleteSpot on!
DeleteGbam!
DeleteStudy your partner. Wisdom is profitable to direct.
Better not to say anything@all dan to tell a lie.thanks @ms Gemini,i got my blog ID back
ReplyDeleteI will say Yes if that's will give u peace of mind, but if it's a secret that won't later hunt you, u can as well take it to your grave
ReplyDeleteSome secrets are better off as it is called, SECRETS.
ReplyDeleteNay jor. The only secret I can't keep is if I have a love child, hubby has to know, that's too deep to keep a secret. I will keep some things secret becos hubby too was secretive about his older siblings extent of dependency on him. We dated for a while and I never knew he was the one paying two of his sisters house rent even though they are married and at the same time responsible for their kids school fees, omo if I knew I for reconsider o. Took me a while to conceive and when I eventually did and had my baby it was war, they were feeling so threatened. Anyway I thank God things are ok now, we couldn't have a more cordial relationship now because everybody including me know their boundary. Long and short of my Tory be say as the man take package himself me self I adjust myself sharp sharp, no more full disclosure especially where my family is concerned.
ReplyDeleteOkay, let's do the statistics together. Let's say an average Nigerian girls sleeps with 5 guys/year, and most girls get sexual from the age of 16. She gets married at 27. That's 55 guys before Marriage and you expect her to tell her husband? Hell No.
ReplyDeleteI think it's worse for some guys.
This your stats is highly flawed abeg
DeleteWhich kain mumu mathematics be this?
DeleteIt is always better to leave the unsaid alone
ReplyDeleteIl say NEVER..some tins are better left unsaid biko
ReplyDeleteHowever av disclosed one or 2 tins to my ex in d past n to my surprise it was never used against me but il never eva do such again oh cos not every1 is dat understandin.
N-A-Y!!!
ReplyDeleteIt will always come back to bite your a**!!!
If you want to be 100% honest, let it be about ONLY YOU! Not your parents or siblings!!!
Nay.
ReplyDeleteMy boyfriend told me something about him and I didn't even know when I used it against him.
I fetl terrible for doing that to him and he made me feel worse by telling his brother everything.
Sometimes I feel he hasn't forgiven me completely.
testing testing testing my blog name
ReplyDeleteJust like the woman that sent in her chronicle the other day asking if she should tell her hubby she slept with someone else while they were seperated. There is no way in hell i will say that. I rather die with it.
ReplyDeleteSome secrets are supposed to follow one to the grave.
So duh!
Lol ask chinny igwilo her experience and how it backfired and made her a loser.
ReplyDeleteAbeg, no straight answer since people are different. What Mr A might take, Mr B might not. Know your partner and share what you think they can take as long as it won't come to hunt you. Things you did in d past no matter because you weren't dating. But things like u having a kid? So me thing that will ce out later? Pls share before u even start talking marriage
ReplyDeleteYou have to be honest and reveal whatever you are hiding because the truth would set you free than you getting caught up later bcos you never know with karma.
ReplyDeleteTalking from experience, some secrets should remain undisclosed. I learnt that the hard way.
ReplyDeleteWhat will be will be,,my friend girlfriend then told him all about her past
ReplyDeletedirty life and my friend was hurt and end the relationship with her but a month
later he called her back and forgive her for being open with him cos is only
those that confess there sins are very sorry for there past,today they are married with 3kids and he trusted her so much and anything the wife told him he must believe.
so if you love your soul you can never think of taking a secret to grave.from swiss
Oyibo Anwu ooo....
DeleteSo now me that I feel like fucking outside my marriage because am tired of big and fat dick will now go and tell my husband Abi? Shior, God forbid. I really feel like cheating jare, tired of being faithful. Time to pay him back in his own coin now that he is back to his senses.
ReplyDeleteI learnt a big lesson. Some secret re better to be kept.. I once told my ex secret abt my family and my past life. Dat i ave did abortion before. Omo, d stupid guy used it against me.. So whn I met my Dh. I dint even try it.
ReplyDeleteHarbey!!! How did you come to that conclusion? an average lady would have slept with 55 guy before marriage? That is very wrong, try another.
ReplyDeleteThat very true. I couldn't believe I had slept with over fifty men until I made a list. Make a list my dear
Deleteyea
ReplyDeleteYah, My past is my past if U can't accept me U just go.
ReplyDeletefrom and by experience, av found out MOST men cant handle the truth!..they MUST use it against you. if u cant keep quite its best u go outside and gist wiv a man man or better still narrate ur escapades wit a tree or have ur gullets removed mbok. i learnt the hard way!..so henceforth, truth gbakw'oku!..they soooo following me to the grave.
ReplyDeleteHad an abortion for a very wrong guy that I fell into a very wrong relationship with, the moment we had a misunderstanding, he told all his friends about it and told my friend and my sister, making it sound like, he told me not to,meanwhile he was the one that took me there and his ex gf has over 6 abortions. My sister was very disappointed, I haven't told anyone else, not sure I can.
ReplyDeletedear anonymous, the 50% hoes including your mother slept with dear Nigerian men like yourself......u can use us and expect tomarry virgins, hell no......these days its tit for tat, you cheat we cheat no biggie....
ReplyDeleteMet my wife a virgin
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