Cry me a river!
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
WHEN THE VIOLENCE STARTS....JUST BEFORE THE WEDDING!
Stella bae,i write this with tears and a broken heart...please keep my identity undisclosed. (Thank you so much)I need your "motherly" advice and that of kind-hearted BV's...I am in a state of dilemma and confusion..
This is my story...
I am a very beautiful lady aged 25,a graduate,unemployed @ the moment but am learning a skill and I got engaged last year and did my introduction with my man who is 9 years older,an Engineer,Tall, goodlooking , very hardworking and my wedding is slated to hold this year.
But there's a huge problem...
I visited my fiancee to get acquainted with some of his siblings/family members who stay not quite far from his base..
They practically grew up in that location.
2days ago we had an arguement which I perceived initially would have been smooth and perhaps we come to a "good conclusion"..but alas I was wrong.
The little arguement was this:
My fiancee told me he was AS Genotype(same as mine) in the early stage of our relationship before he proposed..And I insisted he should run another test just to be sure and miraculously he came out as "AA"...Let me state categorically that he went for that lab test alone and only showed me the lab test results in one of his visits to my base.
I know at times I can be very spontaneous,annoying, and blunt, (I say it the way it is just like You Stella)..but then am a good lady with a kind heart...
To cut the long story short,i came up with an idea that we re-run another test and this time together.Atleast so that I can really be sure that we are not putting the lives of our kids at risk if we birth sicklers...My fiancee vehemently said NO and demanded we go our separate ways if I insisted...This hit me so hard and I got so angry...There was so much yelling and shouting.
He dressed up to leave the house and I bolted the door,hid the key and denied him exit(I admit I was wrong)...I started crying and begged him to stay cos I wasn't feeling too well.
Stella Bae,this man slapped me,flogged me with his belt and beat me blue and black...He even tore my "cardigan" in the process...Right nw as I type this,i have bruises on my face and am back to my house (ps: I live with my parents)
He's been calling but not begging and right now am so scared...we dated for 8 months before he proposed..And i've known him to be a cool,caring and loving man...He has never laid his hands on a woman before.
Stella Bae,should I go ahead and marry this man after all the beatings and punches?
Or do I need to pick my running shoes?
Please help a confused sister...My eyes are swollen from crying.
Who told you ''he has never laid his hands on a woman before''??? SMELL THE COFFEE!!!
He should never have laid is hands on you -NEVER!
it was wrong of you to have stopped him from leaving but he should have controlled his temper and not beat you...wait!...he flogged you? Because of what?
You are 25 and still young,please lace your boots and run otherwise this is just the beginning.The next time you are headstrong,the next round of beating will occur. Wear your running shoes - RUN.
This is my two cents and i might be wrong but please give your own opinion and dont say ''Stella is right''
............................................................................................................
NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
WHEN CRYING BECOMES IRRITATING
Hi Stella Bae *side eyes*
I've got a problem. hopefully, you and your readers could advice me on it.
I've got a girlfriend, who I love so much and would like to marry soon, but there's a problem. My girlfriend loves crying.
This may not be a problem, seeing that women are emotional beings, but hers is beyond me. It was never this way before, she probably read somewhere or watched something somewhere that said men loved crying girlfriends...cus I don't understand.
Growing up, I always saw my mum crying because of my dad's philandering ways and I hated it. I hated seeing her cry, it hurt me soo much- it made me hate my dad (we cool now). Since then, I couldn't stand seeing a woman cry, I just couldn't.
Now, my girlfriend probably (or maybe not) knows this, and still cries for little things. I work in Apapa and live on the Island and bae lives in Ikeja but wants me in her house every other day! I try, I really do, I try to see her at least 4 times every other week but she still cries if I miss a day. It hurts. I hate to see her cry...sometimes, I leave my house by 10pm to the mainland so she doesn't cry.
Last week, we were going through BN weddings (bad idea), next thing, I see tear drops on the laptop...
Me: bae you okay? Bae: yea I'm fine, just being emotional here lol... Me: ahh cool.
Two minutes later! just two! bae already starts crying..
Me: ahn, why is this getting to you? we could get off the page ..naa, bae told me she was crying because I haven't taken the bold step yet. This came to me as a surprise cus we talk about these things...we talk about OUR wedding, marriage, future etc.. why did she have to cry about it? Few days before, my mates and I were on about it.. trying to put two and two together to get the best surprise proposal for her. Why did she have to cry? why couldn't we just talk about it like adults?!
The other day, she wanted some money to buy kits for her workout. Cool, I'd send it to you tomorrow, I forgot to send it that week. I was honestly too busy and she of all people knows that, just a text to remind me will suffice. But no, bae called me that weekend to cry. Maaan.
The latest one now, is getting angry at me for walking out on her when she cries. I hate to see her cry and I can't stand it, so I walk on her most times. She gets upset. Lol it's even hard trying to be a 'macho man' cus she's just going to use her cries to soften me.
Is it a money matter? my babe will cry! She knows she's the only person I spend on, after myself anyway. I'm the youngest child and I don't take care of my parents, I already work in my Dad's company. So, I'm left with her and myself! any miscalculations or money delays, she'd cry!
My friends told me to leave her but what they don't understand is, I love her, it wasn't always like this. And she's an extremely sweet person. She's literally my best friend and 'gist partner' lol.. at least, when she's not crying. Plus I'm scared to move on with wedding plans because of this cry cry issue, I need to get it out the way before I marry her. Hence my questions:
1) Could it be a psychological problem? are there physicians that deal with this kind or things...is there medication for it?
2) Is this a girl thing? Some of my friends belive it is, but in my past relationships, I never saw anything like that...abi its a new thing and I'm the abnormal one?
3) How do I teach her to use my mumu button without crying? My last girlfriend (Note* I'm not comparing them, I love my girlfriend with ALL my heart!) didnt do anything like this, and got me to do a whole lot more than my present one has...and I love my girlfriend more! She knows she has the whole of me to herself, I have no idea why she still cries.
4) OR is she just crying to blackmail me, seeing that I hate to see her cry? I try not to believe this because everything is fine when she isn't crying...I mean, she could still get me to do stuff when she does't cry.
Please I need answers. What can I do?
Thanks guys!
People cry for different reasons,however frequent crying is a sign of emotional breakdown of some sort.Please discuss this with her and tell her how its affecting you...She might probably cry more but let her know and please watch her oh,love is not enough reason to marry an emotionally unbalanced person.
I pray the comments that follow help you understand better.
All the best sweety!
Will just read comments
ReplyDeletePoster1....I think you need to pick up your shoes and run like Usain Bolt!!!There is absolutely no excuse for beating a woman...Maybe God made it this way to make you rethink about the wedding.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 ...I see you are really in love..Why don't you discuss with her about it,tell her you don't like it.. And maybe she is the fragile type.. Be patient with her.
Read the story about the warri girl that was beaten to death by her husband in Malaysia. I just weak like dodo.
ReplyDeletePosters I will come back to answer you when I have the energy.
Poster 1 u just start d flogging, stop asking dis silly question if u should marry him, pls don't come here and start blabbing later.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 dat ur girl is a big pretender, she's a green snake under green grass, she will show u pepper, and she will use her etekete to cover things up, a beg leave her, dats d truth.
Poster1: pls leave d relationship... u r young n will get someone who loves u n who isn't d same genotype as u.. since he vehemently refused for u 2 to go do d test together, something is shady
ReplyDeleteposter2: i am a cry baby myself... i could cry for no reason at all.. it dont mean nothing really.. if u can't stand it, u can talk it out with her tho.. goodluck
Poster1 that guy will beat you again for sure,you should have let him out of the house well he just showed you the other side of him...no matter what a man is not suppose to hit a woman @poster2 depends on why she is cryin!when next she start to cry join her in cryin and see if she might stop
ReplyDeleteFirst narrative,
ReplyDeleteJust thank your God for making you see the beast you would have married....
Better RUN for your dear life....
2nd narrative,
Na love dey worry you and your girl....
I have no advise for you...
@poster1 : please run as fast as possible.
ReplyDeleteDon't make the mistake of marrying him cos u will regret it.
Btw, I think he is AS
@poster2 :she is blackmailing you with those tear knowing that you hate 2 see her cry.
I do that at times.
P1, try not to push, u bolted d door,hid d key, naaa!!! U should hav just allowed him go, no dey drag with man, dey will disfigure u for free, if u r with a hot tempered person, just allow them have their way during an argument,dont push their "fire button",u don drag with d guy now he has lost control,if u want to run,run n let some other cool headed babe take-over, or whenever there's yelling n shouting, don't yell n shout with him..if he sees Floyd mayweather now,I'm sure he can't lift his hand.
ReplyDeleteP2-ur babe na last-born? Hahahahahahaaa! make she no go cry on d wedding day o! Hehehehee.
Does she cry in public too? Lol
Does she cry during sex? Hehehehee
Manage her crying episodes or u follow a bae as strong-willed as P1..*sips jik*
Me i cry too but not so much.
ReplyDeletebtw is she pregnant?
pregnant ladies cry at and for everything.
Poster1 ur boyfrnd might be As,poster2 I don't just knw wat to say concerning d cry cry tin ohhh,me self tire
ReplyDelete****LONG LIVE SDK & SDKERS*****
Poster 1:Like seriously?
ReplyDeleteWhen you got home with bruises on your face, did your momma not ask you questions? ? Or you lied to her about them?
You are an adult and so you should task your brain to think.
If you have been regular here, going thru all the chronicles, whc DV has gotten better?
How many women come back here to say 'My horse band used to hhit me, but he doesn't anymore??
And you say he calls you, but not to beg, meaning he is not even sober. ..
He probably thinks he was right to have done that.
Use your tongue to count your teeth..
PPoster 2; you are such a sweet guy, God bless you..but I think she's doing it on purpose and currently overdoing it..
Get it out of the way, tell her how you feel..and dat you are hers, she can make a point without crying!
@poster2 : your gf is 2 emotional.
ReplyDeleteHer own crying is 2 much
Talk 2 her abt it.
Little tins makes me cry but I don't unnecessarily
Narrative 1: Smh
ReplyDeleteNarrative 2: Smh
Poster one did I hear you say he has never laid his hands on any woman?
ReplyDeleteI'll advice you to pack your shii and run as fast as ur legs can carry u! What? He even used his belt,what nonsense!!!madam read the writing on the wall.and dissappear from that man!hes a beast..
2.really have nothing to say but talk.to her about it..
see me looking for tears to cry sef I no see..
Narrative 1: That man is AS, and if you marry him, you are putting the lives of your children at risk. Next, don't ever challenge a man like that- locking door and hiding the key, if he wants to leave let him. I suggest you DONT marry him. You are 25, other men will come.
ReplyDeleteNarrative 2: Your girlfriend thinks that crying makes her more "vulnerable" and feminine and will make you love her more. Better talk to her to snap out of it.
Poster 1, it's a good thing he came up with the beast attitude before your wedding. My dear, since he had the mind to beat you now, that means there is every tendency that he can do it over and over again. Most times we girls know the truth and still lie to ourselves in pretence of love.Don't marry because of material things rather marry because you find self satisfaction/happiness in the man you wish to love. The ball is in your court now, i guess you are old enough to take the right decision.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, it's normal for we girls to cry. We are usually unnecessarily emotional. Most times a girl cries out of control if she is madly in love with you. I guess your girl loves you like mad. Please sit her down and explain to her how you so much detest her crying habits. At least with that, she will limit her cry cry baby attitude just to please you. I wish you all the best dear.
Omo see love. Love nwantinti. Ok oooo. Le boo where are you oooo?
Narrative 1: Don't ever go into marriage with d aim of managing, I can categorically tell you that it doesn't work. I have been there so I know.
ReplyDeleteChai God give me dat rich dude dat will show and teach me how to use his mumu botton oo, some gals lucky sha o......sugar
ReplyDeleteNo 2pls talk to her about it n if she refuse to stop dat oganje cry abeg leave her alone dont marry her cos if u do n u not likin her crying to ur hear u gonna leave her in da end so better u be sure b4 u spend for uneccesary wedding cos dis her cry no be emotional cry anymore na destruction
ReplyDeleteMay God help us all
Poster 1
ReplyDeleteYou provoked him to anger and he dealt with you accordingly.Why did you lock the door and stoped him from going out?You no try abeg.The choice is yours,stay and work things out or quit!
Poster 2
Your girlfriend is acting like a baby and you just have to accept her like that .If she cries unnecessarily again,walk out on her and let her be,if you do this for like 5 times and she doesn't change,give her some space.She is too emotional and if you end up marrying her,she won't be able to raise your kids like you would have loved to.
I went to a saloon one day and this pretty lady walked in with her 2 daughters to make their hair.Am sure the younger one is like 3yrs old and the older one is like 7yrs old.These little girls were just crying like babies and the hair dressers were annoyed.whenever they touched their hair,these girls would cry of pains and their hair is is soft and long too.To wash their hair alone took like an hour and everyone in the saloon got involved.At a time,their mum started begging them,I was expecting her to spank them but she didn't.B4 we knew wat was happening,she joined them in crying.She started saying that all the saloons they've been to have been rejecting her daughters due to their "cry cry".This same saloon ended up rejecting these little girls after washing their hair and adviced their mum to cut their hair.Their mum was still crying and begging,In my mind I was like"a baby cannot raise babies".Her daughters learnt from her.So my dear,your girlfriend has a very serious problem,am sure she was spoilt as a little girl and she got whatever she wanted by crying.
Poster 1, at 25 you want to get married to an abusive 34years old man? How were you able to explain the reason for your bruises to you parents? Only desperation would push you into that marriage and you will write another chronicle here....Walk away....Disappear! !!! 1. He is an abuser....2. your genotype is a barrier as it is. He will beat you blue and black tomorrow if you give birth to an SS carrier and the child falls ill. Be guided....
ReplyDeletePoster2, take off please....she is emotionally unstable, or being manipulative....I was irritated already just reading the mail, so I can't imagine what you must be going through....Speak to her about it, and let her know it's getting on your nerves, and you will walk if she doesn't stop. Mydear, it's too much baggage to carry into the future....When you leave her, come to me ok. ....I don't cry.....*side eyes...
Poster 1- Im glad you admitted it was wrong for you to have blocked the door. On the other hand, I think its the handiwork of God. Yes. Maybe, just maybe God wanted you to see the kind of man you want to exchange marital vows with. Its clear enough that he beats women, so don't tell me that he has never beaten a woman before in his life. He has dearie. Open your eyes and face reality.
ReplyDeleteAbout his genotype, Im sorry but your man is clearly a liar.......and a woman beater. Id he knows he isnt lying, why get angry when you suggested you both run the test together.
There are still alot of things you need to find out about your man before you proceed with your marriage arrangement. Im sure you dont to end up in a miserable marriage. In the end, its your choice to make. Cheers!
Poster 2 and and his cry baby girlfriend. Sorry oo. I understand how irritated you feel. Talk to your girlfriend about it. If you get married and she cries everyday, what will your baby/children do? Mother and child nor fit de cry everytime nau. Find out if she s got emotional problems or insecurities. Take it up from there. Cheers!
Poster 2 next time she starts crying, sing cry cry baby... for her, it works on kids like magic, you'll see your baby will stop crying or you start crying with her, she'll stop to ask you what is wrong!
ReplyDeletePoster1 i'll say RUN for your life, he did it once he might still do it again. On no account should a man raise his hand on a woman it's a sign of weakness and infirority complex
#nenyvilleblog#
Poster 1: you ain't married yet and he is beating you up or flogging up because you locked the door which is rude and provoking, but he shld never lay a hand on you, no matter what, u are going to offend him again and will he result to hitting you which won't solve anything, don't run cos no one is chasing you, just CATWALK out of there like a QUEEN(eg Queen Elizabeth, have u ever seen her running before)
ReplyDeletePoster 2: Something is truly wrong with her, or that's how she knows how to show love, if you leave her, she might cry herself to death!! Just sit her down and let her know your view about her tears and how much you hate it!! You have a good experience with about your mother so use that as a point in your discussion!! Thanks
Lol @ the crying bae! She's not balanced emotionally.....
ReplyDeleteOnce a beater, always a beater. Poster 2, u got a cry cry baby on ur hands. Take it or leave it.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, that man is AS. Forget the result he showed you, it is fake. Why doesn't he want both of you to go for a test together? To top it all up, he beat you silly. He's calling, but not apologising yet you're still considering marrying him. Seems like you love getting beaten.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, are you sure your girlfriend isn't hiding something big from you and each time she remembers, it makes her cry?
Poster 1, that man is AS. Forget the result he showed you, it is fake. Why doesn't he want both of you to go for a test together? To top it all up, he beat you silly. He's calling, but not apologising yet you're still considering marrying him. Seems like you love getting beaten.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, are you sure your girlfriend isn't hiding something big from you and each time she remembers, it makes her cry?
N1, How are you sure your fiancee has never hit a woman before? he flogged you with a belt even! I want you to know that if you marry him the beating will continue, marriage won't change that.
ReplyDeleteN2, Something is wrong with your girl, i will advice you get to the bottom of her problem b4 you propose because coming home to a crying wife every day won't be funny .
Poster 1: He will beat you again. RUN!
ReplyDeletePoster 2: When I lost my dad, I became an emotional wreck and could cry for Africa. It became an issue for me. Mention my dad's name and I'll start crying. I cry for no reason. The tears just came even when I didn't want them. I almost cried @ an interview and that was when I decided to seek help. My mum got me a counsellor and I let out all the steam. Now I am good. I still cry though but not like cry cry baby.
Waiting to learn from comments while siping nutri-c orange flavour.
ReplyDeletePoster1-Stella is right lol, I beg of u leave that man because he will continue beating u in marriage, dnt marry him because u will regret it am telling u, he is an animal nd he will never change,take it from me, he will frustrate u, tell u he paid ur bride price nd u must fo everything he asks u to do, u know y am saying this? He is domineering nd he will oppress u cos u are young nd he is 9years older. If u go ahead with the wedding,I repeat U WILL REGRET IT, u r not too old to find love again, dnt mk d mistake of settling with a beast of a man,he wil kill u if u dnt heed,dnt experience it to be wise mydear, poster2, this cry fit be format or mayb she's just lik that, I cry too but not like this, sometimes I could rmbr something n start crying lol
ReplyDeleteN1. Run for your dear life. That man has something to hide.you insisting on genotype what of HIV/AIDS. He is bad for you
ReplyDeleteN2. Its either your gal watches too much of telemundo or read too many mills and boons. It might just be emotional blackmail. Give her space.
@ poster 1, please strap your running shoes on and run as far from this man as possible. Trust me, this is just a snipet of how things will be if you eventually marry him.
ReplyDeleteHe shouldn't have laid a finger on you, no matter what. And to think he flogged you with his belt? My dear, that man is a tyrant.
@2, i'm not sure what to say to you, all the best.
Click my name for all your celebration cakes and cupcakes, cheers
Poster 1 you are still asking whether you should go? Jeez! Women o, it's us that give men the silly guts to do something this drastic and go scot-free! You can clearly see the handwriting on the wall and you are still asking? He is not even begging and you are asking? Biko bae FLEE! Don't even run! Flee from that man, before you regret for the rest of your life! He is not AA better know that(i know your heart is already telling you so), he is arrogant ( sounding from your narratives) and he is a woman beater( urrrgggghhhh!) bae please flee flee flee and don't you look back! And I know you will forever regret if u birth Sicklers. Broken engagement is better than broken marriage! Take heart but it is what it is, the earlier you move out of sorry life the better for you!
ReplyDeletePoster 1: better run coz ur man is still AS and don't want u to leave
ReplyDeletePoster 2: ur GF is black mailing u with her tears o. Be wise
She might be blackmailing you jare,which kind tin bdat,or mayb she's scared of loosing you coz u re a great guy so she cry to draw u close....
ReplyDeleteNo 2.y do I feel she z using it against u..no1 plz borrow leg oh
ReplyDeleteSecond narrator: people are different hence it's normal Buh it can stop. The only reason why it hasn't is because you yield to her demands each time she cries. If you want her to stop don't yield to her demand when she cries, it's difficult Buh trust me it works. Whenever she uses cry to make you do stuf, don't do it. Gradually she will stop. Tnk me lera.
ReplyDelete@ poster 1:now listen; on your heels; get ready; oya take it off like usain bolt. I hope you are running very fast; now as you are running listen to me; your fiance lied to you initially with the first genotype result that he alone went to do.what he is applying now is called defense mechanism. he doesn't want you to find out when you two go to the hospital together; but allow me to say this; he must that foolish to play with such a delicate matter. if this is how he reasons even in delicate issues;my dear leave him now because marriage has a lot of responsibilities and he will be the type that will not come out with sincere views when there is a problem in the house because of his selfish reasons.you will be left to proffer solutions all alone and when you see that his own selfish views will come with consequences and you stamp your feet refusing; it will result to beating. in marriage there are times a partner can stamp his or her feet firmly in order to avoid great mistakes and problems.sorry for the beating and don't console yourself by saying that he has never beaten a lady before. pls also learn that forcefulness on men; mostly do not yield positive results
ReplyDeletePoster 1, RUN!!! RUN!!! RUN!!! After running, give thanksgiving in church cos u have no idea wat God just revealed to u.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, she knows u dont like to see her cry dats why she is using it to blackmail u. Just talk to her about it, i think she will stop.
It's well
ReplyDeleteMadam 'he beat me', u no go run abi??? U dey wait make ur enemy die before u become free from his assault..ok ooo, dey dere dey find advice. U go tell me if na by force to marry now now.
ReplyDeletePoster 1...ur situation is really bad I must confess, but I sincerely can't tell you what to do...I think God is trying to show you something...I hope you see it to avoid stories that touch
ReplyDeletePoster 2...you are on your own o...
Poster one! Haba u r only 25! He has no right to hit u, u guys ain't even married yet, if u know what's good for u pick ur shoes and run! This is a sign, besides u ain't even sure if he's AS, what r u still waiting for hon? It will b hard but u will pull through. Poster2 u can talk it out with her u know.
ReplyDeletePoster 1. Beatings nvr gets better but worse..u alone can decide if u want to live wt d constant fear dat he might again and beat u to stupor. Sometimes luv alone is not enough to weather d storm of marriage.. Poster 2. Talk to ur gf abt ow u feeling abt her tears. So dat she can either controll it or hide her tears, becos woman can nvr do without tears totally..or better still join her too in crying wen she starts and let's see d outcome
ReplyDeletePoster 1, are you still there or you've put on your running shoes already? There is every likelihood that he is AS. Is better to know the truth than hide it. whats the point. You dont want siclers for children its for a life time and you will constantly be in the hospital's. There is just too much at stake and on top of that he beats you, flogs you. Did you do more than you said...common he is not the last male walking on the earth. Take a walk and all the best.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, pls sit your babe down & talk to her or tell anybof her close friends to talk to her in a way she will understand.
Poster 1: I dont usually comment on post, but I'm forced to do on this. Pls end that relationship, a husband just killed a beautiful and vibrant girl he called his wife from beating her. Pls end the relationship b4 it's too late. RIP Ese. Say No to Domestic Violence. Women pls be wise. I'm so angry right now.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 : Run for ya life.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 : cry cry baby
@ narrative no 2, is she still young ? like below 25 bcos I use to be like dat wen I was younger but am 28 now and am better but still explain to her on how her tears makes u feel.
ReplyDeleteN1.Are u still asking,u guys re not married and he flogged u hmmm.my dear u re not d first girl he has hit thats y he's still single.Take a walk.
ReplyDeleteN2.My dear she knows u hate women crying,emotional blackmail,possibly emotionally unbalanced.Psychiatric help.
Poster 1 Biko pick race there's no point staying he has started and that'show it will continue. Poster 2 sit her down and talk to her that her crying is getting on your nerves.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, run, run for your life, he flogged you, asin like a criminal??The slaps weren't enough he had to flog you?
ReplyDeleteP2 : she be Be ble ble?she's a cryist!!!
@1 Babe,I admit you were wrong to lock the door but at the same time,there is no excuse for a man to raise up his hands and hit you,its not acceptable,its not tolerated darlyn,you are making excuses for him,who told yoy he has not done it before,this is certainly not his first time,no woman deserves to be beaten by the man you love,you are young and have the whole world ahead of you,dont rush,take your time honey,life its hard enough then to add a man who beats you to it,Hon, its your life and remember you get to leave it once.Love you
ReplyDelete@2 o boy,oga some women ate like that,I am a cry river kind of woman,who will give my hands and legs to help anyone but I cry buckets for the smallest reason,hubby(bless him) is now use to it.sit her down and tell her how you feel about the crying tingy and work it out,like you said,she is sweet girl and you love her,so talk talj talj about it with her and change might not ne immediately but it will come.
Poster 1. ..Run
ReplyDeletePoster 2. ..Next time when she cries, buy lorry load of handkerchiefs for her.
Inugo?
she started crying when you started calling her bae
What does a bae do?
baeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
XOXO MYSTERY
Abeg, let me sit and read comments. Me too I need advice for my life now.
ReplyDeleteN1- run as fast as ur legs can carry u, jesus loves u.
ReplyDeleteN1: Please don't stay in an abusive relationship. Do not give excuses for putting up with his act even though i blame You for ur act. Pls be prayerful too.
ReplyDeleteN2: Lmfao! Seriously you got me laughing all through but I relate totally with your story. Talk deep with her and ask questions, make her understand she can converse with you instead of the tears. Help her get over it gradually and don't listen to your frnds who asked you to leave her based on that. Lol really.
Poster 1: na fela song I get for you. It is 'I sowie sowie o" you better run for your life and stop all this crazy love of a thing. When a guy beats you, forget it...he will continue to do so. am a guy and i've seen some friends beat their gf. Babe!!! My advice for you is to buckle up and pray for another man. But if you like to be battered sha, you can still cope. The beating never much. You still have your bones intact. Gosh...I hate guys that beats women. very annoying. But next time lady, don't lock the door and refuse your man of an exit. It's absolutely wrong and I hate it myself. I do take such things personal. I might not talk to you again for weeks if it was me but I will never beat a woman. My dad never did such, it won't happen with me.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: carry your cross abeg. Na love tingy
#2...u r dating an egbere...goodluck
ReplyDelete#1...u stretched ur guy to d limit of his patience n here u r saying rubbish...he wanted to keep his temper in check by leaving d house for u but u denied him,what were u expecting?for him to rub ur back?...am not supporting men beating their women but women should learn not to act like eranko wen dia men are angry
@ poster 2 your girlfriend has cryingitis, bring her to ezewanyi and it would be solved
ReplyDeletePoster 1 the signs are there, if you love your life don't enter an abusive marriage, he might repeat it n he might not, we can't guarantee that but we are trying to avoid, had I know.
Women stop pushing your men too hard, trying their patience, not all men can control their tempers. You should know when to lie low and allow the moment pass, to avoid fight.
Men no matter how the women push, please try as much as possible to control your temper, so you don't do anything you will regret
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePoster one;run as fast as ur legs can carry u. them go beat shege comot for ur body soon.Once a beater always a beater, check well,he had been beating his female siblings for him to even use belt, him no be junior in the game
ReplyDeletePoster 2:If crying is the only problem u have in ur relationship go and kneel down and thank God. U would be silly to leave her becos she is emotional. she will grow up by the time she drops babies and even if she doesnt stop the tears, try and live with it. we make sacrifices for the ones we love. Crying is nothing compared to cheating and abusive girlfriends.
Good luck to both of U!
Last poster#ruuuuuun! Shiz a sick freak!
ReplyDeleteN 1- run n run. Was in a similar situation. 6months dating. Had done introduction but his violence n stone heart sent me running n I have never looked back. Best decision I made. Someone who beats u is a threat to ur life. Don't be foolish. U r still young. N2 ur gal is a manipulator. She knows u hate crying n she is using it against u. But it's starting to back fire. Sit her down n talk to her about it,tell her it's not d best way to approach u. If she refuses to change. Leave. D worst thing is being married to someone with a trait u have Zero tolerance for. But first talk to her. N work it through.
ReplyDeleteN 1- run n run. Was in a similar situation. 6months dating. Had done introduction but his violence n stone heart sent me running n I have never looked back. Best decision I made. Someone who beats u is a threat to ur life. Don't be foolish. U r still young. N2 ur gal is a manipulator. She knows u hate crying n she is using it against u. But it's starting to back fire. Sit her down n talk to her about it,tell her it's not d best way to approach u. If she refuses to change. Leave. D worst thing is being married to someone with a trait u have Zero tolerance for. But first talk to her. N work it through.
ReplyDeletePlease run for your life and never look back.
ReplyDeleteSomeone that flogged, and tore your clothes, isn't someone that has 'never laid hands on a woman before '
I'm saying it as i'd do,if it were me,to avoid tales of woe when you get married. Thankfully, you aren't yet.
There is no excuse to hit a woman.None!
Poster two :
It's either she has a medical problem or she is just the plain-annoying clingy,leaky faucet type.
So you can't ever leave her alone and travel for work or business?..
Hmmm
Poster 1 : don't go into that marriage becos of pressure, if he can't control himself now, is it when you are married with kids with all the pressure and stress that comes with that he will now control himself.... Read the hand writing on the wall but if you still want to go ahead make sure you carry out the genotype test for him again.
ReplyDeletePoster 2:she has discovered your mumu Maga button and is using it big time, this is called manipulation, incase you don't know, I had a female househelp once like that, when she offends you, she will cry, when you often her she will cry and the cry increases to unimaginable proportions if my husband is at home, no be small thing, after a while I realised what she was doing and gave her the warning of her life that if I ever see her cry again in my house I will fling her things out, of cos that way the last day she cried in my house, did I also mention how rude and I'll mannered she was, thank God she left my house and sanity returned.
Good luck poster 2...
Proster 1- the man is a coward. Don't marry him. Otherwise be ready for more punches. He will never stop.
ReplyDeletePoster2- what an emotional lady! Hmnnn....
#1# you should not have denied him from leaving g the room,he was probably angry and the best thing for him was to leave and calm himself,yet with your oversabi you locked the door and hide the key,and you are blunt,who told you stella is blunt to her husband too?learn how to talk,apply wisdom not evrytin that comes to the brain should come out of the mouth,even as a woman when am angry walking away for sometime is best for me,and when someone tries to stop me from doing that I snap,you are totally wrong even if you don't get back to him don't try this with another man,if he has apologise and if you see it fit to forgive alright but if you think you can't just let him go,the last decision is yours to make
ReplyDelete#2# your gf is probably doing it because she has noticed it gets to you,you have to talked to her,this time if she start crying don't leave her,you are a man,don't be a weakling,how i hate weaklings,just tell her how you feel and that her crying irritates you,she will cry more stay there and watch her cry don't pacify her
Good luck
25 yrz n u want to force ursef to marry an abusive man...dnt marry em if u like ur life cos wen nxt he will hit u,u wil slip in hospital or morg.....be wise n leave fr ur own good.
ReplyDelete2:wen nxt ur gf wants to cry,start bfr she starts.evn wen she begs u to stop dnt stp.if u continue like dat,she go de 4get to cry.
~@iamjbankz SA to President Jonathan 2015~
Poster 1 pls run as fast as ur legs can carry u!
ReplyDeleteDat u tried 2 prevent him from leaving d house, is not enof reason 4 him 2 beat u "blue black".
So pls walk away from dat violent man.
Poster 2 lmao! I just couldn't help but laugh.
It could be dat ur gf is a cry baby.
It could also be her new tactics
Watever d case maybe, try letting her know how u feel bout it.
N1, run run run and tell him catch me if you can. N2, talk to her and she would finish the cry that day.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, God has revealed the kinda man you want to marry to you. Fine men get angry and lose their temper at times but for a man to continously flog and punch a woman he claims to love while seeing her cry is beyond me. Biko you are still young, i'm sure you wouldn't want a lifetime full of punches. If you forgive and continue now, what's the assurance that he won't do worse when you eventually get married? The ball is in your court.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, hahahahahahahaha. Forgive me for laughing but the way you narrated this is so hilarious.
Since you said she wasn't always like this, maybe you should ask her what the problem is. It might be beyond those things she cries about.Make her feel at home with you and re-assure her that you can solve issues without her crying. This will make her cry some more but at least you would have passed your message across. All the best!
Awww Poster 2 I love her already and please don't leave her... Talk to her about it and knows what's up with the sudden chage. You sound like a good man and I'm sure you are that's why you didn't adhere to your friends advice and note that its not everything you should tell your friends advice, and that's why you won't leave her when she is not all loving and nice but 'irritating', Stan by her and everything will be fine. Communication matters and there's one more thing... For a relationship to get to a next level different things come up to break it. It might be as silly as this. Well, hence you love stick and work himgs out.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 I seriously don't know what to say cause I need this advice too myself #confusedmuch. I pray God gives us strength and wisdom.
Poster one sounds like a trouble maker or rada a nag.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 - I understand that too much of everything is bad, I believe with time she will stop after much cautioning.
Let me relax n read comments, sipping my palmy, but tears r turn off 4 me, especially wen u just cry without reasons or over little things. Been with someone dat is emotional unstable leads to heart break n worst still hrt attack
ReplyDeletePoster wit d cry cry baby as galfrn may God strengthen u n give u grace for more cries.poster1 ur case is in d hands of God,did one he hasn't evn married u yet u receive beating wait till u get get into d marriage u won't live to tell d story.i dey fine that MUMU that calls herself jumy has has just bought my trouble
ReplyDeletePoster wit d cry cry baby as galfrn may God strengthen u n give u grace for more cries.poster1 ur case is in d hands of God,did one he hasn't evn married u yet u receive beating wait till u get get into d marriage u won't live to tell d story.i dey fine that MUMU that calls herself jumy has has just bought my trouble
ReplyDeletePoster 2
ReplyDeleteI believe uv got urself a sweet lady and wouldn't advice you to leave her. Her incessant crying nature myt be due to reasons or issues which you might need to stand up to assist her overcome or atleast provide a relief. So i would advice you do a background check or discuss her past with her, she myt hv issues from her past or maybe previous rshps dat keeps reoccurring and is taking its toll on her self esteem further damaging it wiv time. Please try discussing with her, their myt be a part of her life she hasnt told yu bout (not saying dats the issue) and prolly hasn't been free to have d discussion wiv u cos u sound busy n myt not hv provoded her an enabling atmosphere for such discussion.
Poster 1
i dont think uv known ur fiancee enough to consider marriage with him.....by saying dis i imply knowing him to a point where you can predict his actions or disposition to events not necessarily referring to how long uv known him. From his reactions, its only normal to suspect that he myt have 'doctored' d test result which indicated he was AA and upon ur persistence for a repeat test, he went ahead to reveal a part uv neva seen......shows dat he is desperate to get married to you and at all cost. Please flee from any man who has d guts to raise a finger let alone use hs belt to flog you.....shows u would receive more battering in marriage weneva you resist his decision on critical events concerning both of you.
Wishing both posters d very best and also seek God's face n opinion before taking a final decision.
I can't find the long epistle I typed! This network is annoyingly disgusting! Anyway incase it wasn't posted d summary is:
ReplyDeletePoster1: RUN! RUN! RUN!
Poster2: have a talk with your girlfriend with a big box of tissue handy
Hehehe! Where do I start from? yes: poster 1: it's really hard these days to see a guy that does not beat a girl or slap...but flogging with belt? Not that it does not occur, but it's rare.. I have been into this game for a very long time and have experience from my fellow married ones...
ReplyDeleteI had a friend that was having issues with her husband because he always beat her and she found this guy who she began dating, the guy friend was alway furious whenever the hubby beats her, thou some women provoke their hubby to the point of beating , it can only take a well trained guy to control himself...
So my friend was always telling me how furious his guy friend becomes whenever her hubby beats her saying that he says that he can't tolerate a guy that beats women and I always told her not to trust men
To cut the story short, she called me one day and was crying that what I told her has happened, that the guy friend that was against beating, beat her blue black and even smoked weed which he has never done before, unpon that he forcefully had sex with her which the hubby cannot do.... My point being that most men beat women don't mind what most people will come online and yarn......
Can advice you to make sure the 2 of you go to lab to make sure that his AS as he claims and then if he is truly sorry, try to forgive and move on
Poster 2: your girl loves you too much and she's scared of losing you.... Talk to her that you don't like a cry me a river baby and that it might affect your relationship with her and see how it goes from there....
Poster 1, if u know wats good for u just get the hell out of that mans life. U think the beating will stop after u marry him? My dear it will only get worse. Mine never stopped. If only there was someone to advice me at the time.
ReplyDeleteN1: hmmmm I think you should think twice about this marriage. This AS/AS thing is serious biz so why is he refusing to re-check. I am AS n I checked hubby 3 times before we got married cos I know the implication both medically n from experience. These days medicine has improved but the fear n anxiety that you have sicklers will always be there so I don't see why he should beat you for this even while you were sick.
ReplyDeleteN2: Sit her down n ask her what is the problem and why she changed like Stella said there may be some emotional instability @ the background. I have something close to hers but not just as bad n mine has triggers when am upset I can't show my anger rather I will cry n it's also new to me. I actually am not comfortable with it.
For the first post, biko small gal pick ur shoes and run for ur dear life..u can always meet other men before you die in d hands of a man..Like seriously, flogging you with his belt? That man is a beast plus he is also hiding sumtin about his genotype.
ReplyDeleteFor the second person - I am a lady and I am irritated already with this kind of character..we women just like to takee advantage of everything Haba!
Talk to hern tell her how it's affecting u and the relationship and how u can't cope with it..make her understand that she must not cry to get sumtin from u.
cry cry baby I want to see your mummy ,I want to see your daddy sheh sheh sheh sheeeeeeeeeeeeeh,wi wi wi wi wiiiiiiiiiiiiii. poster two let me ask my sisters children for advice ,am coming.
ReplyDeleteMR EDDY said this harmattan is sponsored by MTN. It is everywhere u go.
ReplyDeleteHehehe. Bros please tell ur girlfriend that u read somewhere that if a lady cries too much it's gonna reduce her chances of making fine babies. trust me..
^
^
^™THAT EDO BOY.COM~wishes u happy new year.
Poster 2: Cry cry baby, so much water in her eyes she doesn't know how to utilize it. MTN should better sponsor a crying competition. She go win am bring you the trophy.
ReplyDeletePoster 1: The first statement about his genotype being AS is the truth. The other result (AA) is false. He doctored up the result, so he's a liar. So both of you are AS. You're not just stuck with a liar but a woman beater. At 25, you're still to young for drama in your life. So better run faster than the speed of light or you get married to him and write stella another chronicle crying domestic violence
No 2: There are different types of abuse. This sounds like emotional abuse biko.
ReplyDeleteP1 u already knw the best answer to ur questions....
ReplyDeleteP2 this one pass me abeg, and NO! I don't think it's a girly thing please. Better address this cry baby situation before goin ahead to marry her else u won't enjoy ur marriage one bit
@poster 2, Mr man pele o, don't worry it's a phase that will pass soon ... But still surface when the need arises. Why do I say this? Bcos me sef can cry. Don't get me wrong, am a very independent lady, my husband even tells me my mental strength is equal to the physical stength of 3 strong men put together. I am that woman that can be a man so many times and a woman when needed.
ReplyDeleteBut sometimes, this crying spirit just comes upon me lol, Il just be crying if my husband is not ready to slee when I am ready, if he does not call me daily (when we were dating), il cry if he doesn't rmbr what I asked from him earlier, il cry just for attention, I cry sometimes and when he is asking me what the problem is I am also asking myself in my mind and I really don't even av an answer, il just cry like a baby.., but after some months il just go back to being my strong self and never see the cry spirit maybe until something else tips me so low and then the cycle begins again.
I think mine is in my genes, cos my mum can cry for Africa . Even tho my dad worshipped her all thru our growing up days, my mum wl cry for anything, 'ur dad screamed on me on the phone', 'ur dad dint give way to the danfo driver when he asked', 'I asked ur dad not to come and pick me from prayer meeting today but he came, there are so many women there who have no husbands and I don't want them feeling bad', what can my mum not cry for.,,oh 'ur dad used a negative word on ur brother, I don't like it when he does that'
I never really liked when she used to cry like that cos I felt she was stressing my dad , and she cldnt tell anyone cos they all feel she is the luckiest woman in the world having my dad, I feel same too but here am I doing exactly what she does. Although mine is only once in two years but my husband already knows what to do, he never allows me go 'low'. The moment things r not working out, he will start encouraging me or pointing out that my attitude is beginning to change.
Long story short, poster she might just be in a state at the moment, mayb cos marriage is next thing on her mind and she is not yet married, so it myt disappear once u guys settle. Just like my husband and I , we av not really had that many episodes since we got married.
But talk things thru with her and let her know how u feel about it. Cos that was what my husband did when we got married and now I understand how my actions can make him feel so helpless and stressed. It is well.
Loooooooool poster2 your story had me in tears! Hahaha haha. Don't know what advice to give you.
ReplyDeletePoster1 he'll kill you if you marry him and he obviously did something shady that's why he doesn't want to go to the hospital with you. Give yourself brain
N1
ReplyDeleteUr bf that calls n is not begging s obviously a beater. I don't have d right to tell u to leave ur relationship. U just need to know what u want. Damn it! He is not even feeling remorse.
Poster 2, ur GF s probably going thru a phase in her life. U should talk to her about it n let her know you don't like that attitude.
Elsie
@ 1: The fact that you said he refused you going to the hospital with him for the test and threatens with a separation makes me feel something is fishy. Are you really sure he's AA since the 1st test is AS and he told you again that its AA but refused going with you for another test. Hnmmm! You did wrong for stopping him from leaving the house but him flogging you is uncalled for.
ReplyDeleteDomestic violence is being preached daily and I wouldn't want you to add to the number of women who go through such daily. Please be wise.
@ 2. I think she knows her tears breaks you down and she's using that to get your attention and also a reassurance of her importance or value in your life.
Talk to her about how her attitude is pushing you away if you truly love her, make it work. Don't quit on her please. Observe her to see the change you want. If you quit, this one fit kill herself o
Hian! Cry baby. Talk to her. I think she cries to blackmail you. I dey cry oh but your babe own don pass my own.
ReplyDelete@poster1... Pls leave that man. He might be lieing about the genotype.
@N1.... My dear I don't think u should get married to a 'woman beater' there wasn't even enough provocation to warrant a SLAP not to talk of him beating u up. U are still young, at ur prime and there are lots of good guys out there, so my dear u obviously know wat step to take. @N2. My guy ur case sounds hilarious to me lol. I think you should talk to her. She probably knows 'crying' is ur weak point and she's using it against u. Stop walking out on her b4 it aggravates one day and she'll hurt herself to prove a point.
ReplyDeleteP1: runnnnnnnnnnnnnnn...that's how domestic violence start. Hope you read the news today about the lady killed by beating...yes you read right , beating, by her hubby in far away malaysia..huh? I'm a man and I don't support domestic violence. Research has shown that most women who suffer domestic violence in marriage saw the signs before they tie the knot. Madam you have seen the sign and your intuition is not wrong for you even to doubt his genotype test is a confirmation of your doubt in his honesty. I'm not God but this is a sign for you to cut it off.
ReplyDeleteP2: I laugh so hard at your narrative..hahahaahahah. Your babe might have a troublesome past or a 'misdoing' and was told because she wasn't emotional with tears as signs she lost out,so she is pouring it all out for you..lol. Sit her down and let her know you got it and the tears should stop
Btw stella, I'm gonna send you a memo regarding my investor request you posted on this blog. Stella BIG and WEALTHY people are on this blog oooo..hmmm wait for memo tomorrow. Thank you for this platform stella. I love you..Muah
#no1 egbaman
Hian! Cry baby. Talk to her. I think she cries to blackmail you. I dey cry oh but your babe own don pass my own.
ReplyDelete@poster1... Pls leave that man. He might be lieing about the genotype.
Poster 1. Please lace your shoe and run as fast as ur legs would carry you. I just lost a friend yesterday to domestic violence. Please RUN
ReplyDeletePoster 1 run for ur life.. cos I jus read on lindaikejiblog how a man beat his wife to death.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 talk abt d matter den marry d babe ...If u love her cos I sense she loves u too
Poster1: please runnnnnn for your dear life, he had no right absolutely no right to lay a finger on you, the sweetest and cool guys are the deadliest(not all sha) so please just waka go front and you too work on your self.
ReplyDeletePoster2, I guess you should talk to bae and let her know what's bothering you ok! I can imagine when u propose to her she go cry tire and your wedding day nko! Cry go scatter her makeup.......all the best.
Poster 1 run for ur life.. cos I jus read on lindaikejiblog how a man beat his wife to death.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 talk abt d matter den marry d babe ...If u love her cos I sense she loves u too
Poster 1, Stella took the words right out of my mouth. Who told u he has never laid handsz on any woman before? By the way, ork on yourself. You cant carry all that drama into marriage.
ReplyDeletePoster 2
Ha!! That ur bae*s cries e be as e get oh haba! Seriously u need to talk about it honestly with her.
Poster 1: One word; Run.
ReplyDeletePoster 2: When next she cries, you ma cry. Just cry. It'll feel awkward and weird, even to her, especially when she sees that your tears are more than hers, trust me, it'll work. Cry on, buddie. Cry on.
Poster 1...Ehn, what r u still waiting for. Ha-le-le right now, dump dt goat. Ha. What u did was rly minute o, d day u'll do worse, Chai, it won't be funny. This is domestic violence o. U beta tnk ur stars u discovered early. Leave him oooooo abeg. Hmmmmmm. How wl somebody use belt to beat an adult like a baby. That goat has no iota of respect 4u o. Pls tk d exit door out of his life,
ReplyDeletePoster 2....I'm sorry I didn't mean to laugh o but...., I rly couldn't help it. There's something about ur apt description dt got me laughing seriously. Ure quite humorous. Pls consider writing.
To the issue on ground, cn u get someone she respects like her mum to spk to her? Also buy her books. Motivational books dt cn help develop her, build her self confidence and self love.
Seems to me dt she has so built her life around yours. To her it's love but it's an unhealthy way to leave.
She needs to have a grip over her emotions. She'll be a wife,mother & boss someday where she'll be responsible for other ppl. Abi when her baby is crying, she'll be crying too? Lol.
As flimsy as ds tn looks, it cn destabilise a marriage. We don't go into marriage wt 50/50 or "better halves", we go as whole, complete and wholesome beings bringing 100% each into it. That's only when we cn fully compliment our spouse.
Pls buy her books by Joyce Meyer, Bimbo Odukoya, "Woman Thou hast loosed" by T.D Jakes &other good authors pls. She needs to grow spiritually &emotionally.
The kind of love she seeks, only Jesus cn give. He's omnipresent &wd b there wt her authors ways even when ure busy at work.
Poster 1 - once a beater will forever be a better they can never change...
ReplyDeleteSo i'll advice you to run for your dear life
Just imagine he flogged you?
Better thank your star that you guys have not gotten married before he started showing the beast in him..
Poster 2- sorry to say I laughed all through while reading post....i think she's just the emotional type and please don't leave her whenever she's like that...
I do that to sometimes but her own to much....
But seriously your write up is too funny abeg.....buhahahaha
My outward apperance looks very mean and tough for a lady,and pple call me margret thatcha, but I'm also a very very emotional person, can't watch a film without shedding tears wen its emotional........neither can I stand any adult crying around me without joining in d weeping competition...............my point is dis, there should be a balance, maybe she's doing dis intentionally bcos she already knows it breaks u down and she get want ever she want or its beyond wat she can control and she may need to get help. I tink u have to sit her down and let her know how u dislike such attitude and how it may get on ur way wit her, if she tinks she need help den both of u should find out how to get help but if she tinks she's fine den she better know where to draw d line as per her tears...
ReplyDeleteCheers
P1: ders no excuse for hitting a lady...as much as its wrong to stand on his way..I do dat a lot wit hubbyand even more but he'll just turn deaf and dumb on me and wen I'm tired of my ranting he'll work out, women wil always be women ...not an excuse to be a nagging wife but der is no reason on earth for u to be hit or beaten by a man, pls borrow urself some dignity and run as fast as ur leg can carry u...may not be easy but marriage is not for the faint hearted ....its a life time journey my dear
All the best and kisses
cry cry baby
ReplyDeletei want to see your mommy
SHAMEEE!!!
sing this for her and she'll stop crying.
NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
ReplyDeleteWHEN THE VIOLENCE STARTS....JUST BEFORE THE WEDDING!....my dear run!!!! Flogged ke? For what? Pleas leave him trust me on this.
Poster 1 mai dear you r still don't try to put yourself in bondage. I would suggest you try to do some findings about your guy to know weda you want to move on wiv him or pick your running shoes. Marriage is a life thing my dear. Poster 2 is likely she's having a psychological issue or maybe she's trying to compare our relationship with that of her friends. I think you should have a serious chat to figure out the main probs.
ReplyDeleteUna get time o,why are u guys telling her to run,@poster1 you might be naive but definitely not stupid...what the heck am i saying sef,infact u are both naive and stupid;the handwriting is clearly written and u run here like a little silly girl asking if u should leave or stay! Biko dont listen to them Bvs don't run,stay there until he turns you into a punching bag when married mtcheeeeew
DeletePoster 2 am a lady and I can cry for africa,if I watch movies I cry,if am hurt I cry if u dare shout on me wahala,but I never cry for my boyfriend like this,he knows I cry a lot,and he would just laugh at it,but dis ur g/f own might be real but it sounds more like a blackmail cos wen she cries she still expresses herself,which in my case I cry mostly cos am hurt and can't express myself.talk to her abt it.Gidigal
DeletePoster number one, did you read about that ex uniport girl dat was killed in Malaysia by her hubby, my dear start running already, my advice to you, 2nd poster pls take your babe for psych check, cos dis crying no normal, cry for what nah
ReplyDeleteGod forgive me...na wetin dat one sabi chop kill am.she see yahooboy she jump go marry am...dat one became her lord n personal saviour n started treating her like dirt till d bastard killed her
Delete1- mbok run as fast as you can, cos where those punches came from, there are plenty lined up. quite now that u can.
ReplyDelete2- Crying is not just a girl thing, its an emotional way of saying that she loves u too much that she can't help herself, sometimes the amount of love is overwhelming and too much for her but still u dont get it.
Solution- stamp ur feet and tell her that her cries doesnt move u, she should find another way to express herself. She will change, believe me.
Thank me later (am talking from experience).
#Uyo JobSeeker#
Poster 1, please carry ur bags n shoes n run as fast as u can. Poster 2 please discuss with BAE, I cry alot but not to this extent.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 please RUN!
ReplyDeleteHe'll hit you again.
Don't make excuses for him ok, he had no right to hit you at all.
I also think he is hiding something about his genotype. If not, you requesting a confirmation test shouldn't have even been an issue.
Be careful dear, that guy is a wolf in a sheep's clothing.
You are young and you'll find Mr right soon.
Remember, a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.
All the best dear.
#Hugs
Poster 2,
My dear, I think your girl is just passing through a phase. She'll get over it with time.
Please don't leave her because of this.
You need to talk it over with her, or get someone she confides in to talk to her on your behalf if you are scared she'll cry when you try talking to her yourself.
These things happen.
Girls are very emotional through some are more emotional than others and lil things trigger their tears. Sometimes they really don't mean to cry, but the stubborn tears will just start flowing and they can't control it.
I use to be a cry baby too. Small things made me cry then. If I read a romantic novel, I cry, if I watch a movie, I cry, if I fight with my younger one, I cry even if I won the fight oh.
If anyone raises voice at me, I cry. Even in the university. 1 of my lecturers use to tease me in class about me tears.
If I remember I or any of my loved ones will die one day, I'll start crying. If I hear any sad news, I'll start crying even if it doesn't concern me.
If my mum sends me on an errand and I feel I'm being made to work more in the house, I start crying.
If I run out of cash and have to go to my dad's chambers to ask for more money, once we finish exchanging pleasantries and he asks what brought me to his office, I break down and start crying. LOL
He'll just look at me, shake his head, open his drawer and fling some wads of notes at me and tell me to leave that he'll send someone to pay in more onto my account later on.
My tease will cease immediately, LOL.
When I'm very happy, I cry. When I'm sad, I cry.
Everyone tire for me at a time. Even I tire for myself. I tried to stop, I really tried buy the tears kept flowing at will.
I was still like that when I met hubby, the guy tire for me at a point.
Once my face changes, he'll be like, please please please don't just start! Because like you too, he can't stand seeing me cry.
Anyway, I have outgrown it over time.
I still cry though but not like before, and not unnecessarily anymore.
I don't know how it stopped. It just stopped.
This too shall pass ok.
Just talk to her about it and be patient with her. that's what love is all about.
If you feel she needs to see a psychologist or something, fine. Just try and make her see that you are trying to help her.
It is well dear.
Dear Poster 1. Please Run as fast as you can, I dunno why am scared for u! I NEVER comment on blogs, I read comments, laugh and share in people joy or sorrow! And I spend most of ma day n night refreshing just to read news, gist and gossip. Only for me to see dis. Belt? Belt??? Nothing u did deserves that. Would you even beat your child with that? I dnt knw you from anywhr o, but God just gave you a sign. He will never give you something bad. A lady, 30yrs old, bot married in 2013 just died! From domestic abuse. She was too scared to walk out of the marriage, fear of bringing disgrace and shame to family as it wasn't up to 2 yrs old. And she died. You are not in yet.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 God just showed you the red signs, so if you want take it and run, or just close eyes and marry him oh and be prepared for more of this beating.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 sit her down and talk to her, she must have known tears move you but she's begining to over do it. Talk to her to stop that it doesn't move you any more, if she starts crying then walk away keep away for some hours or day then finally it will get to her that tears isn't a weapon any more for her to you. She will stop believe me.
@ Poster 1- my sister, pick up your running shoes and run as fast as you can. What you did was wrong to lock the door against him but i don't blame you as you are trying to be sure not to work into fire in the name of Love. You don't walk into a future full of regret and torture in the name of love. and if i may advise you as a sister, you are 25, you are still very young. don't get me wrong, not that you are young to get married, but I'll prefer you getting a job and making yourself an indispensable asset for any man who comes your way rather than being a liability. If you have a good job and you are OK, better men that will treat you as a queen that you truly are will come your way.
ReplyDeleteposter 2- different things and situation makes people to cry. You will soon get tired and irritated,if you are presently not and that will definitely cause a drift apart in your relationship/marriage. Sit her down and talk to her,let her know the way you feel, if she really wants you, she'll change.
Narrative 1, Sis, any man that beats you once will do it again. He must have been hiding something thats was why he didn't want you guys to re-run the tests and you even said he called you but didn't apologise! What nerve. Just count your teeths with your tongue, i'm not saying you should walk away atleast not for now! Just still monitor him and if he still raises his hands on you, Let go...Narrative 2, People are that emotional, i am for example so i see no reason why you should worry yourself over mere crying which is obviously a sign of love and fidelity.
ReplyDeleteposter one: God is showing u a prt of ur man he had safely hidden. be wise tn go fot thanksgiving.
ReplyDeleteposter2: sit her dwn n talk to her. crying is nt as issue, but nt for d reasons u hv statef
Poster one: u beta remove ur shoes and run ohh...cuz he will still do it again and it will even get worst wen u get marid to him ohhh
ReplyDeletePoster two:cry cry baby I want to see my mumi shame shame shame shame..hhahahahha dis chronicle got me laffin......Pls talk to her and tell her u don't like d way she cries about tinz dat are not imp and u try to avoid tinz dat will make her cry...some gals are too emotional
....
Poster 1, it is boldly written already, the guy is not meant for you, run, run, run...
DeletePoster 2, looks like you really love this girl, do me a favour sit her down nd talk to her, it could be a psychological problem, smth must have caused it. Let her understand that her cry makes you feel uneasy.
I can relate with poster2;very typical of me. I don laff tire cos I can cry for Africa just to get his attention;laff wan kill me die. But mine is very understandable cos he lives abroad and he's ahead of me by 7hours. Talk to her sha
Delete#yztoor#
#1: Honey, the question you ask can be equated to asking whether you should take a car with obvious break issues on a spin. The reasonable foreseeable outcome would be an accident due to failed breaks, yes? However, there's still a pretty slim chance that the you may miraculously not have an accident. Probabilities.
ReplyDeleteAs disturbing as the lies and genotype situation is, in my opinion, the violent outburst takes the cake! Baby, there's no reason in heaven or earth for a man to raise his hands to A woman, let alone HIS woman. A spontaneous slap only reveals the hidden potentials of physical abuse but some may argue that, that doesn't necessarily mean it will degenerate into physical abuse. What about a man who slaps, beats you black and blue with a belt and tears your cardigan? What's responsible for his pent up anger? How dare he threaten to call the whole thing off because you ask for transparency? How can a 34 year old man be this animalistic to his 25 year old fiancee, even if she did a silly thing? Shouldn't he assume the role of a guide and guard? What's the point of the age gap if he's going to act out like a teenager hyped up on steroids? As if the genotype controversy isn't complicated enough, now he resorts to intimidation and emotional blackmail! I tell the single ladies never to marry a man whose passion dies before the walk down the aisle. How can you settle into a routine before you even get married? A man eager to be your husband will never utter those unsavory words to his bride to be.
Sweetie, the answer to your question is obvious but you have to decide on the quality of marital life you want. It's a pity society puts too much pressure on young girls/ladies to get married, if not, why should a 25 year old girl even consider marrying a guy like this? Most ladies settle for less because they fear they wouldn't get a better option soon enough. They'll rather marry a jerk at 27 than wait till 35 for a good man. But they fail to realise that that if you rush in at 23, you may rush out more complicated at 33 and may even remain single till 40.
It's your move on the chess board, darling, you can either checkmate this guy or keep being a pawn. Choose your next move wisely, your life depends on in.
Ronalda darling, don't I just love ya!!!
DeletePoster 1.Run as fast as your leg can carry you.I know what I am talking about.YOU HAVE TWO POISON WAITING TO KILL YOU IN THAT MARRAIGE IF YOU MARRY HIM.
ReplyDelete1.Wife battering
2.Giving birth to SS kids.....If u love these two things,you can stay o.
Poster 2.Your girl might be having a disoder of some sort.
Or she might be using it as a weapon and weakning point against you...which ever is d case ,get rid of them in her if not ,u are in for a very big trouble in future.Dats my peanut advice.
BV,pls help me get a job na...i'll commit suicide ooh. it's not fair
Delete#rootzy#
P1. Genotypes cannot change read d handwriting on d wall, he is AS and doesn't want to leave u. Rethink cos if u beget kids with SS u will suffer more cos d pain of a child in pains falls more on d mother. P2. Na wa oo. Well u av to be a man. Don't let her deceive u with tears cos before u know it u r crying with her and things will not be done d right way. Even if she cries, u be strong lest u ppl make mistakes cos of her tears.
ReplyDelete@P1, God forbid that I waste my typing skills responding to you. After all we have said and done on this blog, u still deem it fit to ask us stupid questions. U have either two options, u either hit the search button on this blog and seek out similar stories and reader's advice plus stories of women already married and undergoing such and BVS advice OR u send us your wedding IV and let's have follow up emails on ur new life after marriage. Mschew!
ReplyDelete@P2, I laughed and laughed and laughed after reading your story. You are such a sweet man. Seeing as u love this lady very much, I think u shud sit her down and have a long talk to her. Don't act angry or upset, just tell her you're not comfortable with the crying thing and that with time, u will come to ignore her crying episodes. Let her know u want to marry a strong woman who will approach issues with maturity,ask her if she wants u to marry her out of pity for her tears and then detest her later or because she has all the qualities you want in a woman, tell her you want a woman who will be a good example to her children and not turn your children including the boys (how embarrassing) to wimps. Let her know that u understand she's human and will cry atimes, but that should be over substantive issues. I think by the time you're done, she will reset her brain.
Alternatively, if you are bold enough, send her the link to this SDK Chronicles,kpom kwem!
poster one or guy is AS and u are AS is that not enough for u to run
ReplyDeleteposter two your bae na onome. manage her.
Lol.....ejike, what do you mean by hus babe is Onome,do you know the meaning of that name?
DeleteLmao... Funny
DeletePoster 1
ReplyDeleteChill on the marriage plans. He's a wife beater. Every wife beater has murder crawling in his veins. If not intentional, then it will be un-intentional. One day, he will lose it in a moment of blind rage and do you an irreparable damage. So cool it. Don't marry him. Its a life of unhappiness waiting for you if you do. If he gets away with this flogging and you marry him, you have sealed your doom. Forever. Better to marry late than to be "The late.."
Poster 2.
Your wife seems to be a very emotional person. I like the way you described her as your 'gist' partner. That's a very good ingredient for a good marriage.
But some women do cry very easily. Its the sign of a tender heart if it isn't being used to blackmail the man. In this case, I'm not so sure what it is. You need to talk to her about it.
Or better still, try to subtly find out from her close family and friends if this is truly 'her'. Then you can know what to do precisely.
Perhaps the crying is your 'mumu' button? That's why it gets to you so much?
Oh dear, first narrator, if I were in your shoes, I would lace it and run as fast as my legs can carry me... an abusive relationship begins with one slap, then apology, then another slap + punches until one person goes to the great beyond. Please think twice
ReplyDelete2. Please talk to that girl and find out why she acquired such irritating habit. Let her know it's affecting you. From her response, you may figure out how best to help her.
£ Mido€€€€
Poster One he hit you to cover up ur talk about getting the test re-run.. So here's what I think.. His Genotypeis actually AS plus he's a wicked and callous person for trying to hide this.. Add a woman beater to that equation and you have a no good douche bag.. Please do not go back to him.. GW pls come and give her a big hug for us all..
ReplyDeletePoster 2.. Please do the needful she just wants to blackmail you into taking the bold step.. I assure u once that is done you will be wondering where the tears disappeared to.. She's lucky sef.. I try to cry for DH and the tears will refuse to come and now he thinks am macho and strong willed but I watch an emotional movie and tears will well up my eyes.. Imagine..
Poster1,pls run ooo.
ReplyDeleteAbi u've read about d waffi lady.her Malay husband beat her to death.yea its difficult bt you are still 25.
Poster 2,I don't really know what to say.cus am kinda quilty too.I watch movie I cry,I read a novel, I cry.I see a cute couple,I cry.I see pictures I cry.I hear stories,I cry.I listen to a cool song,I cry.I see a cute baby,I wail oooo(I love babies.I'm very single o) I tell u my past relationship, I wail!!!.lol.but I'm kinda stronger now.take her out to somewhere nice and quiet and talk to her.or wake her up in d middle of the night and talk to her.bet she will "man up".
And seal it with a kiss
or a good lovemaking.......
@..sometimes, I leave my ho7use by 10pm to the mainland so she doesn't cry..... hahahaahhahah
ReplyDeletePoster 1, call off that marriage and leave dat guy. Majority of the people that get into abusive marriages always see the signs before getting into it but chose to ignore it with the hope that their partners will get better with time. Well, they never do. They actually get worse. I just read d story of a young lady dat got married to abusive husband who beat her till she died. She got married in November 2013 and in just a year plus, she is now a dead woman. She might have seen d signs ab initio but chose to go ahead with d marriage. See where it landed her?
ReplyDeleteApart from him being abusive, don't u think that his refusal to let the two of you get tested together is questionable. My dear, God is giving u a clear warning. Better save yourself before it's too late.
Poster 2. Your girlfriend is blackmailing you with her crocodile tears. These are the very manipulative types. Let her know that her tears are now irritating. Have a heart to heart talk with her nd then let your instincts guide your decision but just know it, she is manipulating you.
Poster 1,RUN RUN RUN. Poster 2, have a hrt to hrt talk with her cos been too emotional can be irritating. U can never knw hw to pls her.
ReplyDeleteLmao! Poster 2.. This your story is quite hilarious! Maybe i should be crying to my bf too,on the other hand i dont have enough water in my eyes lol! Can i just say first of all that you are so sweet.. All them i love her with all my heart and the things that u do for her! I dont think this is any reason atall to brk up with her.. Pls talk to her about it.. Joke about it and be serious abt it,tell her why u dont like it.. Bring ur moms issue into so she gets the real picture! Tell her to save the tears for when you'd propose and when she'd birth ur babies (tears of joy) ok?.. Ok!
ReplyDeletePoster 1... Pleaseee pick your shoes,and run as fast as u can! I cant stand someone shout at me,how much more beat. Pls abeg! Forget whatever disgrace u think u may feel,maybe from frnds uve told abt ur wedding. Being alive is better than death ohh! I would have said talk to him about it.. But mehn.. He aint even begging! He is a proud man! And why did he get defensive about the tests? He lied then! Please let him go! Explain to ur dad or mom!
Tbh,i loveeee this blog! But its sooo tasking commenting, but absolutely fun reading the comments! Lol.
@ poster1 u were wrong for locking the door, there are better ways to communicate @ that point when you discovered his rage all you needed to do then was to be calm n control your own temper, because 2 wrongs they say don't make a right...he had no reason to have hit you but you called it upon ursef, don't run anywhere you guys should see and call it off in a matured way that's if breaking up is what you want, no mater what we say here what you want to do is best known to you, because for you to cover for him with such statement"he has never laid his hands on a woman" it means you love him and cnt stand brking up wit him....so think bout what you want
ReplyDelete@poster2...marry her because that's what's obviously disturbing her, it has happened to me too, I cry and feel sorry for myself...and I allowed little things to disturb me then. Sit her down talk sense into her like you just did here, but please still go ahead with your plans to propose coz from all indication you Love her so much..#forgive my typos am @work
Psychologically?....Nah! I think it is manipulative. All you need do is pick a day you would be free,take her out and have a long talk with her.
ReplyDeleteTell her that her crying is beginning to get on your nerves and put you off and if she continues like this it might cause a strain in your relationship. Tell her she can ask or tell you things without having to cry about. Be firm and loving at the same time.
Goodluck.
POSTER 1 I know it won't be easy but please do not go ahead with the wedding cos he'd keep hitting u and moreover he might actually be an AS...think
ReplyDeletePOSTER 2 I use to be a cry baby too but not anymore lol, I just knew if I cried then in the presence of my fiance (now hubby) it breaks him...will read comments tho.
#1, kindly leave the man because he will beat a hell out of u if u get married to him. Don't ever be under that illusion that he hasn't beaten a girl b4, it is a complete lie, he does, its only becos u'v not dated 4 long didn't allow u 2 see d demon in him. Any man that beats a woman is not worthy 2 be married to, don deceive ursef, love is never blind becos there is a cooler of beating and flogging stored 4 u if u fall in2 the d trap of marrying him. Don't allow any of his sweet words deceive u, d flogging jus began!! # 2, talk 2 her and see her response, she might b too emotional due to some past or family issues, but if her crying symptom persist, u'll need 2 call d relationship off, emotionally unstable people are not good enough 2 marry, u'll end up committing a crime u neva dreamt of if u continue this way.
ReplyDeletePoster 1 pls run as fast as ur legs cud carry u,flogging n beating u said?pls break off from such r/tionship cos u ll receive worse than flogging if u finally settle wit dat man,poster 2 pls sit her down n know why she behaves dat way,she might be doing dat to get ur attention again she might be passing thru psychological probs dat requires medical attention who knows
ReplyDeletePoster1 pls walk away from that relationship bcos since he beats you while dating he will surelly do it over and over again
ReplyDeletePoster one...CarRy your slippers..dust it..oso... run as fast as your legscan carry you..unless u want to turn to a punching bag...nevertheless.. u wia
ReplyDeletewrong by locking the door..don't do that again..
Poster 2:..just do as Stella told you..sit her down and talk to her..
Poster 2...
#2: Sweetheart, take her for a pregnancy test and rule out the possibility that you've knocked her up. Lol!. This sudden outburst of water works may just be an attestation to how "fertile" you are, you young rascal! Lol.
ReplyDeleteLadies cry for various reasons. You claim to love her so try a little tenderness. Don't walk out when she cries because she'll misunderstand your intentions. Instead hold her in your arms and kiss her forehead till she stops. I'm sure she just wants more attention.
Plan a romantic getaway or a nice lunch date. Treat her to a good time and when she's in cloud 9, take her in your arms and cuddle her for a bit. At this point, she'll be so over the moon that you can even convince her to cut off a finger( not like that's what you want, of course) Once most ladies feel such intense emotional connection, they will gladly give their men anything they desire. So this is the time to make your request known. Hold her a little tighter and tell her how it breaks your heart to see her cry and each time you see her cry, it kills the romantic side of you so you have to keep walking out on her because you hate how it makes you feel and you are fear that this will make you not want to spend too much time with her because of the guilt. Trust me, after this, she wouldn't even cry if she slices an onion.
As women, we'll do whatever it takes(as long as it isn't demeaning)to win over the hearts of the men in our lives. The best way to appeal to a woman's "stubborn side" is through a bit of tenderness and maturity, especially the women moved by romance. Good luck, buddy!
P.S
I hope she doesn't read SDKB, though.
You are so on point! You nailed it to the head? Kudos to you.
DeletePoster 1 let Me start by asking you some questions. How do you know he has never beaten a woman before? He probably told you that.
ReplyDeleteWhy did he flare up suddenly cos you asked to run your genotype test together? I dont know what you think but seriously i think your BF is hiding something, i ve been there before.
For crying out loud you re just 25,re sure this is what you want,that you can put up with his behaviour? My dear this is just a tip of the iceberg i tel you if you push through with the marriage, he will turn you to his punching bag. He will do it over and over again cos he knows once he ask for forgiveness, he will be forgiven. My dear let him go so that a better person can come ok
Meanwhile next time dont ever try to stop an angry man.
Poster 2 pls sit her down n let her know she is no longer a baby. Which kain cry cry baby be dt one?
You can actually make her stop crying by making sure you dont dance to her tunes when she does.
So when you eventually marries she will be competing with the kids abi. Hmmmm let her stop ooo
Poster 1 I'm sorry to say but u have to run as far as u can. Did u say beat u with belt? For what? When I didn't even see what u did wrong. If u start having sickler 2morrow, he'll impregnate an AA woman and leave u to suffer. If he has done it once he'll do it again and again. The fact that he's not apologising means he's not sorry and he can do it again, so run for dear life.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, tell her that crying doesn't soften u that it repels u. Just talk to her n see how can help her. Tell her its making u have a 2nd thought about her and how happy you'd be if only she can stop crying. Although I like crying sha, I can cry for africa, but I don't cry unnecessarily.
Poster one
ReplyDeleteThis is God telling you to ruuunnnnn!!!
The biggest mistake you will make this year is to marry that beast!!
What you had is not an argument na,wait until you marry him. Don't you know that after marriage arguments about his parents,your parents might come up??
What about when you spank your kids and he dislikes it? It means you are dead!
Or when preggie hormones make you do silly things like mine?
Couples have silly arguments as the years roll by. If this man starts pouncing on you now, chai! You are on a long thing!
He is not supposed to lay his hands on you no matter what!! This is only the beginning and his belt is already out! Fleeeeeee!
Btw, his Genotype might be AS! He is too desperate!
Poster 2
Lol! The funny thing is that I was actually a strong girl when I met hubby,now I cry when I see a limping ant or an elderly person looking unkept.. I can't dare to watch Titanic or Notebook now...lolzzzz
I cry at the drop of a hat!! It is so bad now that most times I find myself crying,and then laughing because I look silly..
You see,you can marry a hard babe this minute and she turns out to be such a crier when she is pregnant..lol. Will you run away?
As long as you treat her right,you are not an "onion". Just pet and cuddle her..
Lmao! Am still laughing here sef.
Do quick and marry her joor,you don't have a serious case dear.
Ps: Try and let go of the past. Come to terms with what happened to your mom and strive to become a better man than daddy.
Narrative 1: "he's never laid his hands on a woman before?"...If you say so, then you are the first...My dear if you go ahead with this be ready for more beatings cos it has already started. Better a broken relationship than a broken marriage.
ReplyDeleteNarrative 2: I honestly think she cares about you but is just a cry baby and has some trust issues...I think you should come out clean with her, lay the cards on the table and pls be blunt about it...yeah, she would definitely cry again but she will come around and put in some effort to work on herself...You need to do her that favour, walking out on your relationship doesn't solve it if you truly do love her..Just maybe she has dreamt of you proposing on bended knees...*wink*..a little patience and maturity won't kill her though..Phew..
Poster 1: Marry the dude and i guarantee you that the first flogging you got will be child's play compared to subsequent ones. EOD
ReplyDeletePoster 2: she's manipulating you and if you know you really love her, you better discuss it with her and let her know its a no-no. A mature woman should be able to express herself without bursting into tears at every opportunity.
im with you...on ur thoughts..
DeletePoster 1: pls borrow legs from usain bolt and do the needful.
Deleteposter 2: y do I have a feeling that ur girl is using this her cry stuff to blackmail u. U can find out from her family and close friends if she has always been like this. Better shine ur eye o!
Ahahahahaha poster 2 you got me laffing. Biko I no understand the crying thing ooo,i have seen emotional girls but this one you describe pass me.if you don't ping her sef,she go cry!!!!i hope she won't see this post and start crying?.Well,my tear gland is dry so I might not understand.
ReplyDelete@Poster 1,is it the genotype ish or beating?If you can't cope with the beating, you berra move on especially this one you both aint sure of the real genotype. The ball is in your court
P1 dont marry him.
ReplyDeleteP2 she wld stop after a while.
Love is not enough to marry an emotionally unbalanced person! Best advice ever. First poster. Please run away. He's a nice man but very wicked. Imagine wanting to marry you despite AS and not that it's a crime but. At least he should come clean, if he's not a woman beater, he would have stopped at the first slap but he has experience in woman beating. That's horrible. Thank god it happened before any wedding. Some women prayed that it happened once at least so they'd flee. But the ball is in your court sha. Poster 2, tell her once and for all.
ReplyDeleteThe guy is useless, he wants to marry her by all means because lots of pp have rejected him
Deletejust talk to her..tell her how u feel and how d crying affects you...btw,dnt listen to your friends telling you to dump her#friendsalmostalwaysgivebadadvices
ReplyDeleteMy dear, a cheat is even better Dan a woman beater, a woman recently died 4rm beating, biko, Thank God 4 showing u dis, dnt tink u wuldnt find sum1 else, ur 25, plz run abeg, who hits a woman in dis age and tym, u dnt even nid d canvas sef, jst start running. P2, Brb, lemme read ur own story. Poster 1 run o, abeg
ReplyDeleteNone is better
DeleteAsk her why she keeps crying..because am sure she's not going through any emotional stress..because its irritating honestly!
ReplyDeleteP2, lmao, dis ur post is funny, dat girl shuld stp dat nonsense biko, which 1 b cry cry, is she a baby, she tinks itz working 4 her, let her wait til. It bcums really irritating an annoying, wait till she's pregnant, lmao, I tink u both shuld tlk abt it joor, bt wat do I no? Lemme read comments, I no say BVS no dey slack 4 dis kind tin. Lol
ReplyDelete@poster 1 , go nd die.....dats how ESE Died yesterday nd u re here asking stupid question......rubbish
ReplyDeleteNarrative 1 : please for all that you hold dear, leave that man.he will be a wife beater, you have seen the signs and you say you are confused? Confused about what if I may ask.I can't stand men who beat women, I just can't He even had the courage to use his belt to flog you, as what na? As your dad or what?I doubt if your dad has ever done that to you now that you are grown . Please run faster than your legs can carry you.
ReplyDeleteNarrative 2 : I was just smiling all through your story.I guess your babe already knows your mumu button hence the constant cry.Talk to her and make her understand that you are not cool with her cry cry attitude I like men that care about their women like you do.All the best dear
Poster 1 when some1 gives an ultimatum that the relationship will end if a certain question is asked. ehm you need Jesus and Holy Spirit to reveal the truth. And you also need them to confirm if the relationship should go ahead. The fact that he beat you. Only God knows the future. I know of a case where a husband behaved out of character because a strange woman charmed him to leave his marriage. After deliverance their marriage was restored.
ReplyDeleteOnly the Lord knows the Genesis and revelation of a man's heart and how you in the long run will react. So I say take to fasting for three days for revelation. In the meantime ignore his calls to have a clear vision. Focus on Jesus Christ.
In my opinion I see nothing wrong in you stopping him from leaving. It's your right to know the truth. And you deserve the truth because you love yourself and your eggs. You are entitle to the truth so you could make an informed decision. If things come up that he lied then the trust is broken. Even if he justifies the lie Lord have mercy. Marriage not easy having a companion is good but there are other challenges. Lord whopping of the century. Loneliness is not the absence of affection but absence of direction.
Poster 2 emotional manipulation. It takes discernment to bind and cast that out. You attract what you have. Do you love yourself? Only the Lord can secure an insecure person. John 10:10
lol@ crying girlfriend
ReplyDeleteAm sure she doesn't cry while making love.Dat girl no be am smh.
DeleteP1,my dear pls,apply Ussein Bolts,not just because of the beating,but mostly cuz of your unborn kids.if you both are AS genotype,then my dear,that's more reason to RUN!! Your parents might try to convince you otherwise,considering the fact that you've done your intro,but my dear,they won't be dear to save you when he'll be landing you the blows.No woman deserves to be beaten,especially not the way he did you.
ReplyDeletePoster 2,ny dear,I don't think there's any thing wrong with her.Some women believe crying is the easiest way to get to their man,I was once like that too,I could cry for no reason,in a relationship,especially if I wanted to get my way.But when I saw it didn't work on my ex,no one told me to stop it by force.lol.just try and talk to her,tell her the crying is becoming irritating and annoying.I'm sure she'd listen.that being said,Dearest Ronalda,please I need to enroll for some English tutorials.Whaaaaat!! Ma'am,you're good!!! Abeg,teach me o.Again,your maturity is on another level!! Keep it up!! You've really won my heart!! Chi exotic,have I told you how much I love you? Where do I send your kisses to???lol
First letter, Pls u got to leave him Cuz for the fact that he refuses to go for another test with u, shows or tells that his hiding something from you and beating u this way for the first time proves that he will still do it again. For the second letter, Pls talk to you gal and tell her how you feel abt it. I too I'm an emotional person but that doesn't mean I cry every Second.
ReplyDeleteLoll!
ReplyDeleteThe 2nd narrative cracked me up.
I guess she thinks it's the perfect way to get to u. N it prolly works.
You should sit her down n talk to her.
All the best.
Poster 1: My dear lady, kindly run for your dear life. Poster 2: You really need to sit her down and talk hrt to hrt with her abt how you feel whenever she cries, and possibly seek medical counsel for her.
ReplyDeleteNarrative 1: you still de ask question? De there make paent de wear you.
ReplyDeleteHow do you even know that he had never laid hands on a woman before?
You should rather say he has never laid his hands on you before...
My advice? Leave him in order to avoid stories that touch. This behaviour de inside some men blood.
You're 25 and too young to act desperate.
Narrative two: Talk to her. Tell her that this NEW cry cry behaviour is driving you away and making you reconsider the relationship.
Sometimes, you have to be cruel to be kind.
Lmao...post 2,please marry me i promise never to cry. Lol women and their ways.
ReplyDeleteP1-run away babe,he lied to you about the test and since he knows you're bent on finding out,he got agitated and beat you,this may not be the last time he'l get that way which means he'l beat you again.you're still young so there's no rush.
ReplyDeleteP2:she probably has psychological issues.talk to her patiently and take her to seek professional help.
Nar 1. Run away as fast as u can also know that he is probably stil AS that's why he didn't want to the test with u.
ReplyDelete@p1....u need tp 2 run?watz up,wake up n move on plsssssss.@P2 ryt now am crying for u lol,but I fink dez smtin she's not saying, u a nice a person sit em dwn n talk real talk,she's got answers n uv got no questions.gudluck man
ReplyDeletePoster 1: hmmm, I'm really sorry about your situation. I literally feel sad as though I'm the one in your shoes. You have 2 things working in your favour here, you are 25 (still young) and you've seen the abusive sign early b4 marriage. My dear please use all the strength you've got to call off that engagement. Please don't let love/ feelings blind you. He obviously is AS, an abuser, a bully and a very arrogant dude. You don't need all these in the long run. I pray God's mighty hand strengthens you @ this time.
ReplyDeleteStory 2: cry? Is she a baby or what? If you've spoken to her about it and she isn't changing you better give her space for a while (more of a relationship break). Let her cry a river and when she sees that her childish manipulation isn't making sense she will learn to package well. Its difficult when you're truly in love to do some things but my dear, extreme times call for extreme measures. God give you wisdom.
Make I read comments, this one pass me
ReplyDelete@Poster 1, please run for your dear life. 1. I think he manipulated that genotype result, which is why he doesn't wanna agree to 2 of you going there together. 2. The way he beat you up shows he has held on for long from beating you, hence the massive beating you got today. Will he ever stop? I don't think so, so it's your decision but I think you should walk. You are still young.
ReplyDelete@Poster 2, please call her and have serious talk about this with her. Make her understand what she does to you with these tears, if she continues, na you get choice either to marry her or put up with the torture.
BLOG ANALYSER: Blood of jesus! @narr 2 that is me oOoo! I cry a lot. Honestly I need help. I am married nd it irritates my hubby but I can't help. Little things pushes tears down my chin. @1 pls walk away
ReplyDeleteHmmmnn..
ReplyDeletePoster 2 I love u already...
U sound like the 'male' me...
Take care!!!
@Lyn makeover be teasing me.Lol. Love you right back Sis.*kiss kiss*
ReplyDeletePoster 2, sorry about your predicament...but pls tell ur father I need a job, I stay @ surulere...tanx and God bless
ReplyDeleteP1)God jst revealed d type of pson u want 2end up with so pls stop tinkin and leave..dnt u value ursef?a beta pson will cum 4u(AMEN)p2)shez usin d button wella o and dts wat I do 2so mk I no giv advice 4dis one....
ReplyDeletePoster 1. RUN.
ReplyDeletePoster 2. Talk 2her abt it.
A Senior Secondary school science teacher Mrs. Kelechi asks her class, "Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?"
Nobody raises a hand, so she calls on the first student to look her way. "Mary, can you tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?"
Mary stands up, blushing furiously. "How dare you ask such a question?" she says. "I'm going to complain to my parents, who will complain to the principal, who will have you fired!"
Mrs. Kelechi is shocked by Mary's reaction, but undaunted. She asks the class the question again, and this time Sam raises his hand.
Yes, Sam?" says Mrs. Kelechi. "Ma'am, the correct answer is the iris of the human eye."
"Very good, Sam. Thank you." Mrs. Kelechi then turns to Mary and says, "Mary, I have 3 things to tell you: first, it's clear that you have NOT done your homework. Second, you have a DIRTY mind. And third, I fear one day you are going to be sadly disappointed."
Is dat a riddle or a joke?...if it's a joke,den u should work on d punch-lines @ d end of d joke...
DeletePoster 1. RUN.
ReplyDeletePoster 2. Talk 2her abt it.
A Senior Secondary school science teacher Mrs. Kelechi asks her class, "Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?"
Nobody raises a hand, so she calls on the first student to look her way. "Mary, can you tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?"
Mary stands up, blushing furiously. "How dare you ask such a question?" she says. "I'm going to complain to my parents, who will complain to the principal, who will have you fired!"
Mrs. Kelechi is shocked by Mary's reaction, but undaunted. She asks the class the question again, and this time Sam raises his hand.
Yes, Sam?" says Mrs. Kelechi. "Ma'am, the correct answer is the iris of the human eye."
"Very good, Sam. Thank you." Mrs. Kelechi then turns to Mary and says, "Mary, I have 3 things to tell you: first, it's clear that you have NOT done your homework. Second, you have a DIRTY mind. And third, I fear one day you are going to be sadly disappointed."
Yay I commented for the first time with my blog ID yay shoki ahn.
ReplyDeleteWelcome.
DeleteWhenever she is crying be laughing I guess she will stop it lol. But frankly speaking most women that cry about little things are psychologically unbalanced something might be wrong with them
ReplyDeletePoster 1, Runnnnnn
ReplyDeletePoster 2, Talk to her but dont marry a woman you arent ok with. She might end up having mental problem with this her cry cry
Poster 1: Pls discontinue the wedding plan. Poster 2: She is a soft one. She is a normal person. Is she that young? Pls sit her down and let her know how u feel.
ReplyDeleteP1: pls do not marry him....RUN as fast as you can biko. I have lost over 3 friends due to domestic violence so kindly take heed and evacuate yourself from this relationship, a broken relationship is worse than a broken marriage. Meanwhile P2: you'r girlfriend is very emotional no doubt but I think she is using it as a blackmail tool on you. And this is rather unfortunate cos she's beginning to over do it jorrr. Just speak with her frankly buh pls carry handkerchief as she may even cry blood sef!
ReplyDeletePoster 2
ReplyDeleteI believe uv got urself a sweet lady and wouldn't advice you to leave her. Her incessant crying nature myt be due to reasons or issues which you might need to stand up to assist her overcome or atleast provide a relief. So i would advice you do a background check or discuss her past with her, she myt hv issues from her past or maybe previous rshps dat keeps reoccurring and is taking its toll on her self esteem further damaging it wiv time. Please try discussing with her, their myt be a part of her life she hasnt told yu bout (not saying dats the issue) and prolly hasn't been free to have d discussion wiv u cos u sound busy n myt not hv provoded her an enabling atmosphere for such discussion.
Poster 1
i dont think uv known ur fiancee enough to consider marriage with him.....by saying dis i imply knowing him to a point where you can predict his actions or disposition to events not necessarily referring to how long uv known him. From his reactions, its only normal to suspect that he myt have 'doctored' d test result which indicated he was AA and upon ur persistence for a repeat test, he went ahead to reveal a part uv neva seen......shows dat he is desperate to get married to you and at all cost. Please flee from any man who has d guts to raise a finger let alone use hs belt to flog you.....shows u would receive more battering in marriage weneva you resist his decision on critical events concerning both of you.
Wishing both posters d very best and also seek God's face n opinion before taking a final decision.