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Monday, November 24, 2014

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative




Is it wrong or right to get emotionally and sexually involved with someone who dated someone who was close to you.....Involvement after they break up oh!

You want to marry the friend of your ex? OMG,you might gain a spouse but lose a friend!...come inside and lets trash it out please








MARRYING A CLOSE FRIEND'S EX LOVER.....

9 years ago my Friend broke up with his girl friend and after that he moved on, went to the UK and got married afterwards  ( he has two kids now and his wife is in the Uk and he stays here in Nigeria). 

I was a friend to his girl friend even after they broke up and maintained contact with her though we were loosing contact in between then. 

Fast forward to 3months ago we started seeing,hanging out and enjoyed each others company, maintaining the fact that we are good friends..... Of late we both have recognized that we have got feelings for each other and Love each other. She is all i want in a woman. 

 I haven't proposed her yet but when i think of proposing to  her I have mixed feelings about letting my friend down. Question is.....

- Should i let my friend into the know?
- Should i go ahead and propose to her or not ?

Advice Needed.

NB: My maintaining friendship with her caused a rusty relationship with my friend. Though we still see and hangout whenever it is possible .



*The woman your friend married must have been someones ex.not so?
I would just advice that for old times sake and so that you are not tagged anything,have a talk with your friend and tell him you are about to propose to his ex and that his reaction would make no difference.
After you tell him,two things will happen,he will either give you his support or cut off entirely and bad mouth you all over town....who cares?

Abeg go ahead and propose to her and contact sparkles jewelry when una wan buy the rings oh.
Congrats in advance.


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201 comments:

  1. Yes dear,there is nothing wrong in getting married to dis lady.

    Yes,let ur friend know and den propose to D girl...

    Absolutely nothing wrong...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It won't hurt to tell ur friend.

      Click Here
      to visit my page.

      Delete
    2. Oga propose to her today today...u have nothing to explain to ur friend sef

      Delete
    3. You can go ahead and marry her already but be AWARE, OKAFOR's law will take place and yes I mean it, your friend must everly straff your wife.
      Good luck!!!

      Delete
    4. Get married already. . And contact us for cake too. Lol

      Delete
    5. What stupid Okafor's law ?

      What makes you think the lady in question still finds the ex appealing enough to lay him ?
      Don't go casting doubts in the mind of a noble man with your ineffectual theories.

      Okafor's ko, Ibu nil.

      Delete
    6. What are you waiting for? Go get your girl!

      Delete
    7. Nine years is a long time ago o....propose to her already....your friend will get around it. I seriously doubt if it will affect your friendship

      Delete
    8. You are feeling somehow because indeed it really isn't so nice a thing to do. How would you feel if you were the one? So of all the females on earth it is that your friend's vomit that appeals to you? Shiorrrr.
      The woman ma sef, how would she feel being passed round by friends? I can't even be friends with my ex's friend in the first place, when I ex you, I rx everything about you, we could all be civil friends from a distance but never to go and start drinking and funking, Abegiiii.
      I agree with Teetoo jare, OKAFOR's law might be inevitable cus even after 20 years of separation, OKAFOR's law can still be operational.
      Anyway, Poster, since you have dustbin mentality, you can go ahead and marry hour friend's "use remain".
      You berra gaaan look for another Babe whose ex you do not know and marry cus in these era of social networking, the day you and your friend's ex has issues as man n wife, na online fuck dem go use settle am, she and her ex, your friend.

      Delete
    9. If u want her as your wife please go ahead. If u want her just for a fling to kill boredom please leave the lady alone. That's all.

      Delete
    10. Okafors law ko, Okoyes law ni!
      Abeg no be every ex person dey feel for, sometimes you ask yourself what you were thinking ,the only way Okafors law can ever apply to me is if i get raped by my ex.i love my husband to the moon and back and i have never thought of cheating on him.

      Dude, go ahead and propose!

      Delete
    11. Anon huh!, how are you so sure an ex you don't know will still not straff her behind your back? Or that makes it less painful?

      Delete
  2. Gaddammit!!!
    Bros carry go,nothing do you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Your friend is married and have his own family without giving a fuck how his ex will feel, now God has used you to settle her, pls dont let your friend's opinion deter you from proposing to that babe... I wish you all the best.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Its awkward. There will be plenty of awkward moments. Like visits with her present. Unless you don't plan to see him again. Mind games and it will always be at the back of your mind that he's been to that your heaven. You may find yourself imagining things like how it was for them. Abeg abeg, a friend's ex should be a no go area for real friends joor

      Delete
    2. Ody the Ode abeg shut up jor what do you know?
      Ewu

      Delete
    3. Infact let's be truthful ehn, his relationship with his friend would stop abruptly when he marries her. YES O. Even if he lends his support and pretends like he's fine with it, Bros write off that friendship because it will NEVER EVER work or be the same. Your wife is ur future and he's just a friend, so eh. A man gotta do what a man gotta do.

      Delete
  4. Black Monday
    Today has got to be d worst day of my life. Lost my dad early dis morning. Never lost someone so close all my life. You fought a good fight dad, you were really a strong man but you couldn't overpower death. May you continue to rest in d Lord.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So sorry to hear that dear. God b with u.

      Delete
    2. Hugs dear,His in a better place now.may his soul rest in peace.Take heart.

      Delete
    3. So sorry. May his soul rest in peace and may God give you and other members of the family the fortitude to bear this loss.

      Delete
    4. I'm so sorry. God is your strength. May he rest in perfect peace

      Delete
    5. So sorry hun. Hugs and prayers for you in abundance.

      Delete
    6. Eiyaa... so sowee abt ur dad... may he rest in d bossom of d Lord n may God grant ur fanily d strength to bear d loss n move on

      Delete
    7. ANGELRAY SAID
      Eyaa RIP to ur dad.

      Delete
    8. Sorry for your loss dear. Be strong

      Delete
    9. It is well Miss Gemini. Take heart. May d good Lord comfort u, La Efizzy n d rest of ur family. May his soul find rest wit d Lord.

      Delete
    10. So so sorry miss Gemini. I can relate, lost mine 3wks after my wedding. Chai! The worst feeling ever. I will tell you what I tell myself, am glad he saw you marry someone who will love and protect you.
      May his soul rest in peace, and may God comfort your family.

      Delete
    11. Sorry about your loss. May God comfort your family.

      Delete
    12. Oh,my God.. I remember your sister using Nuvi honey's mom's testimony as a point of contact for your dad just a couple of days ago.

      I'm so sorry, dear. May his soul rest in peace and let God give you the strength and grace to bear this loss.

      Be strong, dear. God is in control.

      Delete
    13. This is a really sad news. RIP to your dad dear. May God give you, La effizy and the rest of the family members the fortitude to bear the loss.
      E-hugs hunnaayy

      Delete
    14. Take heart not easy tho,may his gentle soul rest in peace.

      Delete
    15. OMG!!so sorry dear..may God give you and your family the fortitude to bear the loss..

      Delete
    16. So sorry for your lost Miss Gemini, may God console and comfort you guys.... RIP pa Miss Gemini

      Delete
    17. Awwwww.... Im so sorry about your loss dearie. may God grant you all the fortitude to bear the loss. It is well with you.

      Delete
    18. Omg!i'm so sorry dear
      It's really a sad one
      To think that ur sister La effizy prayed for his quick recovery the other day.
      May God grant u and ur family the fortitude to bear this great loss
      So sorry dear.

      Delete
    19. Oh, miss Gemini, sorry for ur lost, may almighty God give u d strength to stay strong, may ur father's rest in perfect peace. Poster talk to ur friend, see what he thinks, not as if u are asking for his blessing or anything, if he is not happy for u,then know he is very selfish. kindly find ur square root and put a ring on a sister hand. Good luck and I wish u d best. Gemini pls take heart.

      Delete
    20. Sorry dear.Take solace in d fact that he is in a better place.

      Delete
    21. OMG! I'm so sorry Miss Gemini.
      Accept my condolence.
      I pray God grants you and your family the fortitude to bear this great loss.
      May his soul rest in perfect peace, Amen.
      Awwww.
      Hugs to you and La Effizy.

      Delete
    22. Sorry about your loss Dear.

      May his soul rest in peace.

      Delete
    23. Am so sorry Mrs Gemini. May God give you and you family the strength you need at this time. *hugs dear.

      Delete
    24. So sorry dear. May God be with you and your family.

      Delete
    25. Sorry, honey.

      You can cry it out, if you want.
      No use bottling it.

      xo

      Delete
    26. awwwww.so sorry. its really sad.may his soul rest in peace.i lost my dad in 2005.i was just in my first year in skool. sorry ehn

      Delete
    27. Accept my sympathy dear. May God console you. It's always okay to cry. Take heart. *e-hugs

      Oyibo

      Delete
    28. Sorry about your dad, may his soul rest in peace with the Lord.

      Delete
    29. OMG! So sorry miss Gemmini.... May ur father's soul rest in the bossom of the Lord.
      La effizy, take heart dear!

      Delete
    30. So so sorry darling, may his soul rest in the Lord's bossom. Please take heart, it is well with you and your family!

      Delete
    31. May his soul rest in perfect peace Amen.be strong dear,God knows it all.
      It's well.

      Delete
    32. I lost my dad too and let me tell you.. The pain from that is so bad, especially when you still have so many memories to share and questions to ask but take heart babe. He is in a better place, resting and watching out for you.
      God knows best.. He is your strength and refuge.
      May his soul rest in perfect peace.
      You and your family are in my prayers

      Delete
    33. May the lord confort U, La effizy and the rest of ur family!! RIP to him! Thake heart dear, E- hugs

      Delete
    34. So sorry Miss Gemini, may he rest in the bosom of the Lord.

      Delete
    35. So sorry dear, may his soul find rest in the Lord. Take heart inuna NNE.

      Delete
    36. Eeiyya what a sad day this must be for you nd ur whole family...am so sorry dear pls take heart!
      May God console you nd give u the heart to bear this loss...amen!!

      Delete
    37. So sorry miss Gemini. The Lord would comfort you and your family, establish and strengthen you guys. You would come out stronger and better. God's grace.

      Delete
    38. Eeeya,take heart Miss Gemini Nne.
      He is resting in Heaven now,Kk?
      sending u warm hugs dear.

      @ Effizzy,may God comfort u darling.

      Delete
    39. Oh Dear my condolences to you and family! May the Lord comfort and console you all. Please be strong!

      Delete
    40. So sorry dear.. Lord comfort n strengthen u

      Delete
    41. So sorry for your loss Miss Gemini and La Effizy! May his soul rip and may God give you and your family the fortitude to bear the loss*hugs*

      Delete
    42. May God give you the fortitude to bear the loss. Accept my sympathy. ....it is well

      Delete
    43. I understand how u feel miss Gemini, that's how I felt when my sweet mum died. May his soul RIP.

      Delete
    44. Miss Gemini and family, accept my heartfelt condolence and may the Lord grant you the fortitude to bear the loss.R.I.P Sir.

      Poster forget your friend who is busy living his life and live yours.Marry her already you don't need your friend's endorsement.
      All the best.

      Betty

      Delete
    45. So sorry Miss Gemini. I pray you get the fortitude to deal with the loss.

      Delete
    46. Sorry for ur loss miss Gemini. May he rest in peace.

      Sassy Mum

      Delete
    47. Take heart dear,may your daddys soul rest in peace

      Delete
    48. Ohhh so so sorry. Be strong dear. May God rest his soul. *sad*

      Delete
    49. @Gimin so sorry dear.... RIP to ur dad....is painful I know buy please take heart.

      Delete
    50. You just gained an angel dear Gemini. I am so sorry for your loss.

      Delete
    51. So sorry b strong believe he is in a bter place

      Delete
    52. Sweetheart darling hugs and kisses! Pls take heart

      Delete
    53. Oh dear! My sincere sympathies Mrs Gemini. Warm hugs to u and la effizy. Pls u both stay strong for ur mum.
      May his soul rest in peace

      Delete
    54. Take heart , dear. May his soul RIP.

      Delete
    55. So sorry dear. May his soul rest in peace.

      Delete
    56. Haa! My deepest sympathy dear. May God grant you guys the strength to get over this. (((Hugs)))

      Delete
    57. so Sorry darling, God will give you and your family the strength and grace to pull through,,daddy has gone to rest, pele.

      Delete
    58. So sorry for your lost may his soul rest with the Lord. Remember the good times you had and be strong.

      Delete
    59. So sorry for ur loss miss Gemini. Ur sister mentioned his illness here a few days ago. My condolences to you all. May his soul R.I.P.

      Delete
    60. So sorry dear gemini..May his soul rest in peace...May the Angels receive his soul nd may the perpetual light of christ shine upon him forever..Amen..My deepest condolence to u nd ur family..

      Delete
  5. Thank you jare Stella...I don't give two fucks abt that friend of urs..9yrs ago? and u are still talking abt the past. Mtchew. Pls send us the wedding eyevee and Irene will bring us the pics for proper analysis. Buy better wedding gown o to avoid lashing! *side eyes

    ReplyDelete
  6. Stella u said it all!
    U guys aint blood related so plss go ahead and propose to her joor!
    He is married u said abi?
    Ehen!
    Best of luck already
    Invite us to the wedding ooh!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You had no business getting involved with her. Looks like you had an ulterior motive all along, it will be very hard to convince people otherwise.

    There are too many other women in the world for this unnecessary drama. If your friend's friendship mean anything to you, let the babe go.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Senseless talk, u r single abi he should come n toast you? He doesn't owe his friend anythingy I wonda how pple reason

      Delete
    2. Your entire lineage is made up of senseless fools.
      Your ancestors collecting sacrifice at your village's T-junction are senseless.

      Why didn't you take up a comment? Why lick my arse? Only Iyalode Ezenwanyi is allowed to mark my comment with her red biro.

      That's how you people will be prescribing textbook solutions that are not practical

      Jakobu ko, Iso ni! Oponu jatijati.

      Delete
    3. Onome no vex.
      She no mean am.
      Buh Goldscent u fall my hand o.
      I hold u in high esteem.

      Delete
    4. Hian! After 9 solid years? Why should he let what makes him happy go because she's his friend ex? How many people do u know that got married without dating anybody prior to their marriage?

      Delete
    5. Madam what are you saying? Friendship my ass! Why didn't he marry her? Naija mentality

      Delete
    6. But its been 9years ,I honestly see no wrong in it, and his love for her if it supercedes his friendship,well then its safe to say his friendship means little to him.

      Delete
    7. @ Onome u must be new to this blog! GD is happily married!

      In other words! GD i dont buy this ur idea o, come to think of it, if he did not keep contact with her, another man would have done that.
      I know it is very easy to get involved wit a friend's ex considering d fact they they all might have been good frieds too.
      @poster, since ur friend is married and has moved on, just let him be aware but his opinion does nt neccessary have to deter ur decision... you are a strong man i must say, going ahead to marry her even wen u know ur friend might have slept wit her.

      Delete
    8. @goldcent or wateva u call urself u must b very stupid, I can reply whoeva I want to....na ur mama get dis blog? Buffoon devil punish u n ur lineage, mannerless married woman, wat warranted u insulting my lineage? Look at u talking abt licking ur razz ass hilarious, dey blog dey form level bloody low life

      Delete
    9. Goldscent slow down with the curses and to think you are one of the few BV I admire and respect.
      Your point is actually senseless and selfish.
      Don't you know that love happens? Abeg chill joor.

      Delete
    10. Lmao. **tears** @Jacobu ko Iso ni lol.

      Butttttt Goldscent I don't think that's the case tho. He prolly didn't have that in mind when his friend was dating her.
      See ehn, destiny has a way of playing things out in one's life. Things that u have no control over and cannot explain. My dear certain twists of fate will happen sometimes in ur life that it would either make u look very foolish or make people amazed at the sudden twist in ur story. Such that defy every odd. This one is even friend's issh, I have seen the ones that involved siblings.

      It so happened that this guy dated one of two sisters, actually it wasn't a date it was a fling. One sister was a reserved one and responsible, while the other was quite wayward. So it was the wayward one that had a fling with this very popular guy then. Fast forward to years later, the reserved sister got into a relationship that didn't work out but she had a child with the guy. But later, both went their separate ways.

      Years and years after, the wayward sister also got herself in a relationship that didn't work and had a child too. So both sisters became single mothers. Now, the reserved sister found love again and she was very happy that he accepted her child.
      When the wayward sister found out who get sis was dating, it was the one with whom she had a fling. She told her sister she would not allow her marry the guy because she had slept with him. The reserved sister asked the guy and he admitted that truly they had a thing but it wasn't serious. But he insisted he wanted to marry the reserved sister.

      This guy knew that they were sisters o, but he realised the reserved one wasn't aware he slept with her sister. So he played along until yawa gassed. Long story short, the reserved sister went ahead and married this man, they had more kids. This issue even caused a family feud that hasn't ended till date, because a part of the family agreed she should marry him, while the others thought it was a taboo and hence marriage should be cancelled.
      She married him without any witness and they started to live as man and wife. Both sisters stopped seeing eye to eye. Bitterness enveloped them.

      My dear, as of today today o, that marriage is over. As in terribly over. Both sisters are single again. If the guy didn't mess up they would still be married. But her breakup had nothing to do with her wayward sis though.

      This one may not be an apt example of the situation, but I am sharing this so u know that there are some situations that make one appear morally lax when it involves love and the pursuit of inner happiness. If sisters can harbour bad blood because of a man so what will happen between friends?? like I said, if the guy wants to marry her he should forget about his friendship...that's the sacrifice for love. It's an intricate matter that defies common sense.

      Delete
  8. I don't see anything wrong in dating ur frnd's ex. Just let him know and then propose 2 her.your happiness is what matters.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I completely agree wit Stella abeg! 9 yrs ago??? Ahan kilode! Everybody has moved on na! Pls talk to him as a form of respect but not looking for his approval! Den go and buy ur ring! Afterall ur friend already has his own family! Wish u d best jare!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Go ahead and propose to her if you love her and damn all consequences.

    ReplyDelete
  11. In all, Love wins, some of us are recycled beings, its been 9years, your friend has moved on, you love her, then go ahead and make her a wife.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hehe ije love...
    Poster its just like Stella said, you owe him no explanation but for the sake of peace, just call him nd tell what your feelings nd plans are for the girl. If he is a man with too much ego then you should expect him to throw a tantrum nd even try to bad mouth the babe sef.
    So he either deals with it nd wish you luck or you sef be ready to lose a lousy friend; nd be the talk of the town!! *shrugs*

    ReplyDelete
  13. Everybody is someone's ex. Pls go ahead with her.

    ReplyDelete
  14. That your friend has married and moved on. So what's the big deal?
    But...
    God forbid that I eat my friend's left overs. No way! It's better to eat a stranger's left overs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My thoughts initially but, fuck it, life is too short mehnnn

      Delete
    2. Leftovers?jeez!can you imagine the kind of word you have labelled women?leftovers?is that what u are?dont you have female friends,a mother(God bless her),sisters or plans to have daughters?leftovers.wow!

      *KISMET

      Delete
    3. Left over? Which bush did y'all come out from? Sigh

      Delete
    4. okafor(jude law's bro)24 November 2014 at 17:20

      Poster,just make sure she's not using u as decoy 2 keep her ex around #NuffSaid

      Delete
  15. Go ahead and propose to her, but tell him first. Do not ask for his opinion ohhhh! Just tell him as a curtesy.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Please, go ahead with the proposal.

    Love knows no boundaries.

    Africans attach unnecessary sentiments to trivial issues.

    ReplyDelete
  17. There is an unspoken rule of "not-dating" your friends' ex.....But since you love her and want to propose, why not?

    ReplyDelete
  18. my friend go ahead and propose to her if your heart is really in it. also secondly, talk to your friend, afterall, he has left her for the past 9 years. Do what you think will make you happy and not what will make your friend happy.

    it is well

    ReplyDelete
  19. Propose to her already plz!!!!



    PS. Love You More AdaDiUraNma.





    #Hot Ice.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Mydear go ahead and propose to her but first do as Aunty Stella said,all that matters is happiness and u av found that in ur friends EX,marry her and enjoy life while it lasts

    ReplyDelete
  21. Counselors in the House please!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Hehehehe...do what u love my dear. In this context, ur feeling is really important ...though u should tell yr friend about it.
    Pray also about it B4 telling him.
    God be with u

    ReplyDelete
  23. chai Stella i love the way u rzn...i throway cap fr u biko....for you i will go and open a google acct..so will notice me....as for poster...so u if ur friend disagrees u will readily push away d love of life..if you know you wont y ask......buh for the sake of courtesy tlk to ur frnd

    ReplyDelete
  24. Whatever jare!I no get advice for now.Loading....

    ReplyDelete
  25. Aunty stella u get mouth ooo, me like the advised way u give oooo

    ReplyDelete
  26. Stella d Advertiser
    buy wedding ring from sparkel jewel

    ReplyDelete
  27. Go and Propose jooor, the innocent girl is waiting for you. Who cares what your guy thinks. Afterall he's married and I'm pretty sure your guy is scrooling some side Chics.

    My only fears is that. After telling your guy that you want to hangout with his ex, he might begin to pick interest in her again.
    Don't dull yourself, the babe is waiting for you to take that steps.

    ReplyDelete
  28. How is this an issue please? Your friend has moved on. He has even gotten married so what exactly is the problem? Is he the priest that will bless your union or are you paying the bride price to him?
    You just need to let him know that you are going to marry someone he knows.. give him the information the same way you will give other friends of yours. You said he broke up with her oo. He should have no say cos he dumped her sef.

    ReplyDelete
  29. let him know... afterwards propose 2 d lady.. invite us for engagement rice & chicken

    ReplyDelete
  30. This is tough and tricky I must say.
    At the end what really matters is your happiness. Afterall your friend is married with kids so he has obviously moved on.
    If the girl truly makes you happy and you both love each other, then by all means go ahead and propose to her my dear.
    You are not doing any wrong to anyone.

    But in my opinion, once you marry her, be prepared to end your friendship with your friend.
    Sad but that's for the best. The only reason you shouldn't end your friendship is if he never had sex with her when they were dating.
    But if he did, believe me, he will use that against you guys one day. It's just a matter of time.
    If not for anything but to make you jealous and angry.

    It's never good to be around or still remain close to someone who has had carnal knowledge of you or your spouse.
    It's a recipe for disaster.
    It's either old flames rekindles or with time you might start feeling insecure if you see your friend and your wife together. Even if they are not doing anything but for the fact that you know they have been involved sexually, mistrust and insecurity might begin to creep in. Which might eventually break your marriage.
    You know how these things work. And you know the devil has a way of destroying people's happiness especially in marriages.

    Guard your own jealously, that's my first personal rule of love/ marriage.

    All the best dear as you decide wisely.
    Remember to pray about this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Listen to this^^^^,iphie are u sure u added the person on bbm(spy cam)because, I just finished chatting with person.

      Delete
    2. Be prepared to end d friendship? Like seriously I don't think he should have a problem with it. If he doesn't want ur friendship abeg move on hin no be road wey u dey pass

      Delete
    3. The best Advice you could get is this or else, you might have issues at the long run.

      Delete
    4. @ladylike..yes we finally chatted..a nice lady I must say...lol
      Tnx dear

      Delete
  31. Good question Madam stellz...His friend is married with kids and he's still dere asking questions...Poster,unless you don't love her enough, if you do....puuuleaseee!! Go ahead and propose jare. Don't even bother asking or talking to your friend about it...Reminds me of my story#smiles#....My hubby happens to be a friends ex( though she left him when he had a setback....But guess what? Am glad she did! Cos I couldn't have gotten someone better, my hubby is an angel in human form and we are blessed with two adorable kids....

    So Mr Poster, like Stellz said, contact our own Sparkles jewelry for your rings....hehehe# Oge adiro#

    ReplyDelete
  32. She's already in ur friend's past and ur friend has even moved on with his life. She has every right to marry whoever makes her happy so also you have the right to spend the rest of ur life with whoever makes u happy. If you are both happy with each other, just get married already. Your happiness should not depend on anyone's thoughts or opinion.
    Let ur friend know about ur decision and whether he is satisfied with it or not is his bizness. He has no reserved right to decide ur happiness.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I will never do it. In real life i am a very loyal woman. If the friend is dead maybe, i am not even sure. For MOI a friend is like a family member.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Friend wey don marry stay dere n grow old. Mother Theresa

      Delete
  34. LOL, STELLA UR ADVICE NO DEY DAT EASY TO FOLLOW SHA. But the truth is dat in the end life will go on poster, so follow ur heart, in fact be selfish, propose. the other individual will get over it if he hasn't already..

    Biko any BVs living around satelite town, i m working on an audio play, if u r interested in being a part. males and females included..... And Stella go be the sponsor in Jesus name.

    ReplyDelete
  35. LOL, STELLA UR ADVICE NO DEY DAT EASY TO FOLLOW SHA. But the truth is dat in the end life will go on poster, so follow ur heart, in fact be selfish, propose. the other individual will get over it if he hasn't already..

    Biko any BVs living around satelite town, i m working on an audio play, if u r interested in being a part. males and females included..... And Stella go be the sponsor in Jesus name.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm very much interested and I live in satellite town.

      Delete
    2. Contact me. 7f08016d

      Delete
    3. Country people...which one is very much or so much. I am very much xyz,I am so much in love, I so much like?? Haba my people...that is not English please. Do not cuss me out abeg, just take correction.

      Delete
  36. Your friend has moved on a long time ago, that's a good thing. You need to let him know your intention before u proceed. As far as you don't mind that they were once together, then you should go ahead irrespective of what your friend says after you tell him.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Pls go ahead and marry her jor afterall ur friend is already married with kids.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Marry her..It is nowhere in histroy that its wrong marrying your friend's ex.Its good to fall in Love.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Replies
    1. Ewu mother of ewu kids

      Delete
    2. Y would you call her ewu mother of ewu kids?????? Asin bringing her kids into it tells so much about the kinda person you really are. I'm dumbfounded but may God forgive you.

      Delete
    3. You can insult if you must, buy why her kids?
      That's so improper @ anon 5:23pm

      Delete
    4. Anony 5:23 are you a charlatan? What's your own with Patts kids?

      Delete
    5. Anon 5:23 Pls don't insult the innocent kids. Nonsense

      Delete
  40. @ Poster: Stella has said it all. I couldn't have said it any better. They've broken up, you weren't the cause of their breakup so you haven't committed any love crime.

    ReplyDelete
  41. 9yrs is a longtime. Besides this friend is married already with kids sef. So why should he mind?

    Follow your heart biko.

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  42. ANGELRAY SAID
    Plz propose to her if u love her after all ur friend has a family now, so she also deserves the right to be happy, if he's not comfortable with ur marrying her then he's a wicked guy. But u no tell us if u don browse her network hehehehe.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Go on and marry her but let your friend know your plans. He has moved on and married with two kids. Don't let sentiments stop you from marrying your choice. If he doesn't like it too bad. If she is what you want, you will do anything to make sure she is yours, including letting go of friendships that add nothing to your life, only take away out of jealousy. If he is a reasonable guy, he won't have a problem with it. 9yrs is a long time

    ReplyDelete
  44. Ivgat nanting to say... madam stellina has said it all!

    ReplyDelete
  45. Like seriously? Is ur friend's name JEHOVAH?dat u have to beg him and get his consent before proposing to ur happiness?....do propose abeg,...his opinion is not needed.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Lol..... Madam linda lawa ooo. See free Advert for sparkles

    ReplyDelete
  47. I would suggest you don't propose or marrying such girl in the future if you and your buddy are still going to be down with each other because later in life, "Trust Issues" would definitely become a thing between you the girl and your friend. Besides that, in the future your friend might be creeping up in silence sleeping with the girl behind your back and at this time she might has become your "house wife" or still your "wife to be", if you know what i mean?. Here is my 2 cents, i would advise you to find your treasure else where because the chances are so high that your friend and this girl can later be "Sex Buddies" in the future cause "Once a smasher is ever a smasher". #TrueLifeStory

    ReplyDelete
  48. I would suggest you don't propose or marrying such girl in the future if you and your buddy are still going to be down with each other because later in life, "Trust Issues" would definitely become a thing between you the girl and your friend. Besides that, in the future your friend might be creeping up in silence sleeping with the girl behind your back and at this time she might has become your "house wife" or still your "wife to be", if you know what i mean?. Here is my 2 cents, i would advise you to find your treasure else where because the chances are so high that your friend and this girl can later be "Sex Buddies" in the future cause "Once a smasher is ever a smasher". #TrueLifeStory

    ReplyDelete
  49. I would suggest you don't propose or marrying such girl in the future if you and your buddy are still going to be down with each other because later in life, "Trust Issues" would definitely become a thing between you the girl and your friend. Besides that, in the future your friend might be creeping up in silence sleeping with the girl behind your back and at this time she might has become your "house wife" or still your "wife to be", if you know what i mean?. Here is my 2 cents, i would advise you to find your treasure else where because the chances are so high that your friend and this girl can later be "Sex Buddies" in the future cause "Once a smasher is ever a smasher". #TrueLifeStory

    ReplyDelete
  50. Sparkles Jewelry all the way! Sparkles Jewelry you are highly sighted. I am excited.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Biko Go ahead and propose to her if she's what u want in a Lady..
    Your friend is married for crying out Loud with kids too,so biko go just on.
    GOODLUCK!

    ReplyDelete
  52. Choi...Stella u don advice finish...wetin I wan talk again?

    ReplyDelete
  53. My advice 2 u is, do not displease urself to please sum1 else. If she's all u want in a woman, den by all means go right ahead!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Buhahahaha! Stells of life! Poster the most important thing in this situation is the profit sparkles will make so she can buy " Richard cards" for us. Wether you wan kill yourself over your male friend that you hardly see, who didn't consult you before he did his thing, that one na for your pocket. BTW my DH knew my ex, they were neighbors. Been blissfully married for about 5yrs now. Every one is living their life. We don't even know if the guy is alive nor do we care. To be happy in life you have to be selfish.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love the last paragraph, to be happy in life u have to be selfish.

      Delete
  55. I married my friend's ex and marrying him is the best decision I made!

    He dated my friend, they broke up and many years later we met, hung out and started dating. By then my friend was married with two kids too. I reached out to her as we were no longer close like we used to be because of distance. First thing she said to me was " Please take good care of that guy". And that was it! We still talk and gist about old times, nothing changed.

    By the way, even if she was not okay with the relationship it would have made NO difference because she was married and dem no stamp her name for the bobo body shikena! I only told her for old times sakes not because it was a debt I owed. The main thing here is that I was no longer close to her like before but if she were my sister, it would have been a no no.

    So bros I hope you have your answer now...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. is this Bukky....and is your friend's name Bola

      Delete
  56. mmmmh. This topic just spoke to me. im currenTly in the same situation. Mine is I didn't have sex with him(my ex).I haven't had sex with is close friend either. My ex and I dated for 3months and we know we were not compatible. But his friend, his so sweet, caring ,compassionate, respectful and takes my matter to heart. I made my intention known to him the other day, but he was so scared I could see it in his beautiful honey brown eyes. I don't care very much for my ex, besides his friend made me get over him. Stella, have had the best 7months of my life enjoying the company of this guy. well God has a reason for everything. Let the world Hate me < IM IN LOVE WITH MY EX BEST FRIEND. YES I SAID IT. Well, I thank God I didn't have sex with my ex!!!!!yepi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's the only consolation I get.God pls touch Coco's Heart. love you long time

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awwww Anon1:46
      I'm happy you found true love. I'm happier you didn't have sex with your ex.

      You see why it's not advisable to jump into bed with every Tom, Dick and Harry we date.
      You no get problem jare. Carry on with your blissful relationship.
      All the best.

      Delete
    2. Atleast you don't have sexual ties with both men..see how free you feel..
      My dear Go ahead..all the best!! You deserve to be happy...carry go!!!!

      Delete
  57. Marry her already,(if u truly love her)as for ur friend, be ready to let go of ur friendship cos if u dnt, trust issues n sentiment might set in,in d future.

    ReplyDelete
  58. We should all aim at giving balanced advice here




    The logic is simple



    If he is your friend, then you guys may have unspoken rules between both of you. You would know if what you want to do will make him happy or not. Different guys have different levels of relationships. It all depends. But you dont need to ask him, you would know his stand already.





    So for example, lets say he wont be happy. Are you ready to lose him? You will have to evaluate your friendship and compare it with your proposed marriage. You will have to decide which would be better for you



    And if he is happy with it, will you feel comfortable having a former lover coming around you and your wife?





    The decision lies with you, but the odds are more in favour of a 'NO'

    ReplyDelete
  59. If it was the woman that wanted to date her friend's ex now,she would be called all sorts.

    Aeegurl...

    ReplyDelete
  60. Your happiness is what matters and since your friend is happy why can't you pursue your happiness

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  61. From every indication you have already made up your mind and I would advise u move on with your plans as you need no one's go ahead order especially not of the man who obviously dumped the babe..
    She has found favour in your eyes and please don't let her go

    ReplyDelete
  62. Go ahead jare do you need any explaination from any person abge do your wedding jor

    ReplyDelete
  63. You've heard Stellz advice, dont forget to contact sparkles o jare....
    Miss Gemini take heart....may his soul RIP

    ReplyDelete
  64. No strength to type
    1000 billion likes to Genny baby's comment.


    XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
  65. Personally, I believe that unspoken rule about not dating your friend's ex is bullshit.

    That aside,In your own case, it's been nine long years so it's possible your guy friend won't even care. But just incase he does, you have to tread carefully.

    Be very, very sure that she is what you want and YOU ARE WHAT SHE WANTS. There is no room for trial and error here because if by any chance your friend is against the relationship and in the long run, said relationship doesn't work out, you would have lost out at both ends.

    I say this from experience. Be sure that she is as into you as much as you are,her and you both are ready to ride this out as far as it could possibly go.

    Do not assume based on your feelings alone.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Hian 9yrs ago n he's married to kids?pls go ahead n tk her to d alter!!whts ur friend's bizness?!sdk princess

    ReplyDelete
  67. Marry her already! Please don't forget to buy rings from our very own Sparkles Jewelry, that woman is so golden she sparkles. Ehn, don't forget to send us proposal pictures o and make it very romantic.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Take heart Miss Gemini, God is your strength.

    Poster, please don't make a big deal out of the situation; do not give him unnecessary relevance in your private life.
    Your friend has obviously moved on with his life, so move on with yours.
    Only make sure you can control your jealousy if he tries to bring up past issues about your wife.
    Wish you all the best

    ReplyDelete
  69. Is a dangerous thing to do and u are likely to regret it in future.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Poster, marry her if you love her but stay far away from your friend, her ex. This is very very important to the peace and happiness of your home especially if she had sex with him while they were dating.
    Any interactions could result in unnecessary jealousy and insecurity. If they ever had any intimacy while they were together then he should be a distant friend to you guys after your marriage. Goodluck!

    ReplyDelete
  71. Eeya miss Gemini .
    I'm so sorry for your loss . May his soul rest in peace .


    Poster , Jenny spelled it the way it should be . Stella also gave strong and tangible reason if you are REALLY REALLY IN LOVE WITH HER , so talk with ex , including your fear and everything . But, If you ask me , I will
    say end it with your friend & follow your love because there will always be this huge tension and weird feeling wherever you all get together , that's for real, no guess work .

    My question to you is DO YOU LOVE HER ? IS SHE WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE AS A WIFE ? If yes please go ahead and make her yours before another man makes her his this xmas celebration .

    ReplyDelete
  72. U dnt hold ur frd any xplaination jo,em don marry so mk em boot out fr ur mata..... Make sure u marry her since she makz u happi... #LoveRules #Justice4Arinola

    ~@iamjbankz SA to President Jonathan 2015~

    ReplyDelete
  73. Poster, your story is too simple
    Make I tell you my own?
    Lool

    Marry that girl #inmagic'svoice

    ReplyDelete
  74. @Miss Gemini : So sorry about your dad.Heaven has gained another angel. May God comfort you and strengthen you.

    Ashafa .....

    ReplyDelete
  75. I am nt in suport,I am also a lady,it apnd to me nd I cudnt go on wit d relationshp weneva I set ma eyes on him it lingers

    ReplyDelete
  76. Sorry miss Gemini. May his soul rest in peace.

    ReplyDelete
  77. If your friend were still single I would have advised you against dating his ex as there`s always an emotional attachment that remains even after a relationship ends. Since your friend now has his own family, I`ll suggest that you follow your heart. It may cause a little strain in your relationship initially but he`ll eventually come around..

    ReplyDelete
  78. Miss Gemini, Sorry for your loss, may his soul RIP.

    ReplyDelete
  79. It can be a bit complicated, as your friend will certainly feel you always had the hots for his ex.

    If he feels bitter or anything, that will be down to immaturity given that he is now fully married. Or did he have future plans to shag his ex?

    Sorry for your loss Ms. Gemini

    ReplyDelete
  80. @Miss Gemini. Take heart. No one lives forever. no matter how hard we try no one will leave this life alive.

    ReplyDelete

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