This is so wrong!....Its bad enough being raped by someone you know,but to be raped by a total stranger is torture....pure hell!
Baby girl dry your tears please.....please!
.jpeg) |
| culled image |
''Dear Stella,
I am crying typing this email to you, I am an ardent reader of your blog and I make comments practically on every post.
I admire and love all you do and how you relate with the BVs. Now its my urn to seek for support.
I am in my early 30s and single, a graduate, I have a good business, make good money, have my own apartment , drives a good car. I have few friends but very close to my family.
I was robbed and raped by a bikeman over a week ago.
I live in Abuja but it didn't happen in Abuja, I travelled on a job assignment to Kogi state and I arrived there late and took a bike, the guy knew I didn't know where I was going as I was a stranger and he could tell because I kept calling my colleague on the phone and she asked me to give the phone to the bike guy for her to describe. the guy took me to a wrong place, packed,beat me up, collected all I had and raped me.
I couldn't reach my colleague again as he had collected my phones, I found my way to a nearby house and the owners accommodated me after I told them all that happened, they felt sorry for me. I couldn't sleep and I cried till morning, they gave me some cash but I couldn't do what I went for and I took the early bus back to Abuja.
When I got to Abuja, I told my sisters and I went to the hospital and all test where conducted and all came negative(I was happy at least) but was told to wait for 6months to conduct an HIV test. Sine then I cant do anything, cant concentrate, I cry all the time and I am scared. I cant remember if the rapist used a condom or not because he was hitting me so hard. I didn't report the case because it happened in Kogi state and I just couldn't wait there the following day to report just wanted to leave.
All I have been praying for is to find a good partner and build my own home, then this happened. what can I do? I am a very prayerful Muslim girl and I believe in morals and justice. Ive been in my room for 5days now am going crazy thinking of the worst, thinking I have to wait 6 WHOLE months to know my fate. I cant talk to the few friends I have and my sisters aren't in Abuja with me.
Please help me.... how can I survive without feeling like I want to tear myself into pieces''.
*deep sigh*.....come here and let me hug you tight.I feel so much love in my heart for you right now in your helpless state.just give it all to God...give him the fear, the pain,the tears....
Oh no, not another story of rape. I wonder how those evil doers live with themselves. Dear poster it is well with you, God will not let you down now or ever. For the record whenever you have to go to an unfamiliar territory, it is better to get a detailed description of the area first before embarking on that journey so you don't look like a JJC. That's what I always do and it has worked well. By the grace of God, you will get a clean bill of health when next you go for a checkup.
ReplyDeleteExactly..why travel to a place you don't know at nights??..
DeleteI keep telling people to stop travelling at nights...
That's how robbers rob and rape one chick I know in Enugu and gave her Hiv along Enugu-Ph road...
Poster,am so sorry for your loss..
Hope you heal soon..
Poster...the world is not over. okay? You would recover. Time and corresponding actions heal all wounds. Phuleeeez they were supposed to give you Post Exposure Prophylaxis (PEP) and contraceptives. The PEP is meant to be for 28days. I hope they did cos that's the only guarantee you won't be HIV infected. Here's a big hug. You would pull through okay.
DeleteDo not leave late for your destination. You should have asked your colleague to wait for you at the park(if you used a vehicle).
DeleteTake heart. Cry,weep,wail,take to God. Thank Him the bike man didn't kill you and ask Him to save you from diseases.
God bless you. And btw hope you keep this news to yourself.
@ queen and boss of this blog.... How can u be so insensitive????? How has ur comment helped this young lady? Must u always judge? If u don't have anything tangible to say y nt STFU. Anty Stella pls post my comment��
DeleteOh dear so sorry. I nearly cried when u said.."help me"...Gossh.. the bastard I am certain wouldn't have used a condom, or which rapist carries condom around? Never heard of one anyway. But not to worry, I'm sure ur test will come out fine.
DeleteSince u are not seeking legal justice because it didn't happen in ur territory, and besides how will they find a common bike rider that raped u? Very complex case I must admit. No wonder some pple will die wretched, one shouldn't pity everyone who is less privileged cos some of them may be suffering from their wickedness. See this bloody okada rider perpetrating such an evil act in his state of abject poverty...God punish him and he will die in penury IJN. He will meet his doom soonest.
My dear don't tell ur friends o, cos u never can tell which of them would use it against u in future. Since there's not much anyone can do for u..i suggest that u seek psychological respite to ease ur emotional trauma, and allow God take u tru the healing process. It is well with u darling.
Very true @Rubylicious... besides Abuja is about 2 to 3 hours away from Kogi state, so u must have left Abuja late to get to Kogi state @Night. so sorry @poster, can just imagine what u re going through right now. Incase of next time, always get to ur destination when it is daytime, especially to places u re visiting for d first time. Its not advisable to move @a night as a woman, d days are evil with wicked n unreasonable men on the prowl out there. Poster u will be fine, though it's going to take a lot of psychological torture, but u will be fine as the day goes by. Cry out to God for inner peace of mind drom within. U also need to see a counsellor very fast to retain ur sanity. I'm praying for you n warm hugs from me to u.
DeleteTake heart,God will see u thru and by d time u go for test it will be negative!btw since its less than a month ago,rush back to any good hospital within the FCT and be administered PEP,dat will help!pls even if u are in an environment u ain't familiar with,dont let strangers and pple u ain't sure of know u are a novice,rather pretend u know d environment but only missed ur way,study pple well before u ask questions,even when dey want to attack u,scream,shout,try to fight back even threaten them somehow, dey will start being sceptical,and who knows u might be lucky they will let u be!dats what dey call being 'street smart'!most of all pls pray always before embarking on any journey dat God should keep away evil pple from u.its not cos it was late dat u were attacked,twas only cos u met a bad person,it can still happen in the afternoon.it is well!God will heal u.
DeleteAs for that rapist;may he be crushed by a trailer as he rides that bike.amen!
Please it could have happened at anytime. Were we not here when a girl was raped on her way to work in broad daylight? We sometimes find ourselves in strange places at odd times.
DeleteDear poster, my heart bleeds and goes out to you. I can't say I know how you feel cuz I don't but I thank God that the guy didn't kill you. In 6months when you go for the HIV test, you'll be negative Insha Allah. In the meantime, pray to God for inner peace, tell Him to save you. You'll be fine my darling. Don't forget to update us.
So sorry poster. May God heal u dear.
DeleteOh no, not another story of rape. I wonder how those evil doers live with themselves. Dear poster it is well with you, God will not let you down now or ever. For the record whenever you have to go to an unfamiliar territory, it is better to get a detailed description of the area first before embarking on that journey so you don't look like a JJC. That's what I always do and it has worked well. By the grace of God, you will get a clean bill of health when next you go for a checkup.
ReplyDeleteSorry dear it is well,nothing will happen to you.but that bastard rapist will surely pay for it,maybe not now but he must reap what he sowed.
DeleteOh no! So sorry my darling sister. May Allah heal your pains. I know for sure that nemesis will soon catch up with the rapist, u won't know know when, but he will definately reap what he has sow. Take heart dear
DeleteOh no!! This is a very sad story!! U will be fine darling!! The God of impossibility will write u a clean story.. go get a therapist to counsel u and plz don't tell ur friends, u can tell ur family just to pour out ur heart but u never can tell the heart of any of ur friends. It is well with u
DeleteMy dear, tears are in my eyes for you. Nobody deserves such treatment, I understand cos I have been beaten up by robbers before but thank God I wasn't raped. Try to pull yourself together and continue praying to God, He will take all the pain, tears and fears away. God bless you! #One Love#
ReplyDeletehey..i cant access ur blog anymore
DeletePoster pls go back to a hospital and request for post exposure prophylaxis. That is to prevent actual HIV infection. Do that as soon as possible
DeleteEeyah, this is not good oh. I don't even know how to advice you; pele, May God see you through.
ReplyDeletePlease don't keep this to your self, make sure you speak to your family (since u said u're quite close to them) and get counselling.
Click my name for all your celebration cakes n cupcakes, cheers
My dear, please take it easy. I know the psycological trauma that comes with being raped but please, don't harm urself. U shall status remain Negative Insha Allah. The Lord is ur strength.
DeleteI think ladies should start going abt with a screw driver or table knife in their bags when going out. It cud be of help when in danger with these heartless rapists. I am so angry at d moment. May the wrath of God descend on all rapists wherever they may be hiding. Amen.
@manna bee,not exactly a knofe or screw-driver...I watched a programme wia som1 was teaching young ladies about security consciousness,don't just pack ur hair with anytin,make sure wat u use to pack ur hair is a weapon..somtin u can use tohurt ur attacker,which will buy u a few mins/secs to try to escape or scream for help
DeletePele dear poster...God will heal ur wound
Delete@manna bee,not exactly a knofe or screw-driver...I watched a programme wia som1 was teaching young ladies about security consciousness,don't just pack ur hair with anytin,make sure wat u use to pack ur hair is a weapon..somtin u can use tohurt ur attacker,which will buy u a few mins/secs to try to escape or scream for help
DeleteI think pepper spray is beta just saying ooooooooooh.
DeleteSighs...I don't even know what to say it is well!!! You will be disease free in jesus name.i am sending you a cyber hug also you definitely need to talk to someone.
ReplyDeleteThis is so sad.soon some stupid person's goin to come in here and say shit abt how she doesn't believe only one man can rape a girl
DeleteBe strong poster ok,blieve me u will b fyn,neva let a bike man knws u dnt knw whr u r going to in d nyt,cos most of dem r robbers n rapist,wat I do is after lettg d bike man talk to d person 4 direction,I go to his bike plate call d number to sm1 @ d oda end even if it fake inshrt if he had bad intention,either he stop carryg u or takg u to ur location,sorry swthrt u wnt ve any disease,kogi state ve heard so much abt dat state worst pple live dere
ReplyDelete@ AnonymousOctober 12, 2014 at 8:50 AM: for your mind now, you wrote something constructive. Immediately I started reading your write-up, I received a spiritual slap from no where. Am certain its your spellings that attacked me.
DeletePlease buy Brighter Grammar na... E no cost at all
All these LIB blog visitors should stick with LIB and stop exhibiting their talents here.
Aijay, see wat ur fellow woman is going thru & d best u can do is criticise someone's spelling. Pray u dont get raped by a man dat cant even spell his name.
DeleteAijay go and sleep biko! Can't you ignore her grammar and pick the lessons she's teaching? I've learnt something new if you haven't kmt!
DeleteGod is surely der 4 u
ReplyDeletePls hope the hospital gave U drugs to prevent infections esp HIV. D Lord is ur strength
DeleteDrug to prevent infections esp HIV? Like vaccine abi? Kai. When they ask u to learn and read u'll be combing ur hair. Ignorant ass. After she was already raped for that matter...smh! Omugo ni e
DeleteDear Poster, so sorry, only God can console u, May HE heal you and erase ur pains.
Who is the ignorant one now? She is supposed to take post exposure prophylaxis to prevent HIV and also postinor to prevent pregnancy. You go comb your hair so you'll become less ignorant. @ poster, believe me when i say "it is well"
Deleterainbow.
Anon 11:55 Pls keep quiet. She's very right.
DeleteYou will be fine.just know it wasn't your fault.Pray and move on.You cannot beat urself up and No you don't have HIV.dont think the worst.the rapist will get what is coming to him.God is a fair God,what goes around comes around.it gets easier...trust me.
ReplyDeleteThis js really unfair...all this rapist moving about dont you guys have conscience at all... @poster wipe your tears...
ReplyDeleteVisit my blog
www.glowysofiscated.blogspot.com
My heart broke after reading this.
ReplyDeleteYou will read comments of hope, sympathy and empathy today but truth is we don't know exactly how you feel and all we can do is imagine your pain and comfort you as best as we can.
I hope you heal, I don't know how to tell you to but I do hope you find that strength you need to pull through. No one can change the past, but we can learn to live it with.
I wish you all the best.
I'm so sorry to hear this. *big hug* all things will turn out well for you. I'd advise to seek counselling. That's the fastest way to heal. I'll pray for you.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry dear..rest all your burdens to God and you will never be disappointed..
ReplyDeletechaii...
ReplyDeletedis bike man...God will forever punish u...
sweetheart.. pls pull urself togeda..as SDK rightly said..hand over everything to God..
#anotherhug4ubabes#
My dear.
ReplyDeletePlease it is not worth killing oneself for. God is your strength and he will heal your pain.
You are not infected. Please ensure you take drugs to avoid pregnancy and anti biotics. Please it is very important.
Put yourself together and see it as one of those things.
Regards.
so sorry dear...
ReplyDeleteOMG! I can feel your pains deep inside of me. Wipe your tears dear, the Lord is with you. No hiv positive news for you in Jesus name. You are going to be fine and come out of this nightmare a better person.
ReplyDeleteRapist re Animals ! Jxt continue Life ma dear and be positive ......Nemesis would surely catch up with him !!!! He would surely regret it ....Life goes on
ReplyDeleteOh no,nt again! I feel so much pain for you my dear sister. I knw its hard to do but pls jst try to forget it for the sake of your sanity. Be strong,have faIth in Allah,pray as much as you can. Insha Allah your confirmatory test will come out negative. He will see you through this. Amin
ReplyDeleteAm soooo sorry dearie,,,D Lord is ur strength,,put everything in God's hand,,he wl sure bless & favour u..
ReplyDeleteThis is heart wrenching/rending( whichever one).
ReplyDeleteAt times like this when I remember Our Lord said we should Bless n not curse, we should pray for our enemies, I feel held back cos that bike man deserves to be cursed!!!!! He deserves to suffer on this earth and die a very very painful death!!! But Lord, your mercy is overwhelming. If God were like men, many ppl would be dead.
My dear am soo sorry. Turn to God in prayers. I know its hard to cheer up but u can't spend 6 months of ur life in absolute misery. I dunno what to say, but just believe God the test will still be negative in 6months. I pray you find joy and happiness again. I just said a prayer for you. *Big hugs*
Listen sweetheart, breath in and breath out as slowly as you can, calm down okay, calm down.Now since you re worried about the six months wait, you can start taking antiretroviral drugs now, since the earlier the better, but by the grace of God you don't have HIV!
ReplyDeleteMy dear, pick yourself up and move on. It's okay to cry now but please this is not the end of the world.Calm down and be a survivor and not the victim even if that's what you're supposed to be.Pray and tell Allah that this is too much for you and He needs to help you out with this burden.Time truly does heal all wounds and yours won't be different.
Enquire about rape survivors support group around your area, and join if they exist there.Always stay around people because the way you're feeling is borderline suicidal, so avoid being on your own!
Please my dear sister,talk to a friend, one you can trust to keep it a secret and encourage and uplift your spirit, I'm sure you'll find you have a friend like that if you check thoroughly.I promise you, your hurt will pass, just cry now and leave it to a God.
Thank you my dear...I really understand ur plight poster but y wait to make a bad situation worse??...whichever doctor u saw shld av adviced u to commence antiretrovirals...even as a doctor, when my colleagues av been pricked while seeing pts in d past...dey ad to commence anti-retrovirals o...even tho we wld av taken the patients blood and tested...and dey r negative...bt der is dt chance that d patient himself is in the sero-conversion state...and in ur case...its even a random guy...whose part time job is rape...
DeleteMy dear its not too late...go and commence anti-retrovirals...altho I think d advice is to start it within 72hrs...bt go and start...dt way u will not 'die' several times before d 6 months start.
I cant blame u at all bcos rape hits really hard...d fact dt u are even able to talk abt it after a week is commendable...
God wl mend ur broken heart...and he wl heal u also...
It shall be well wt u...and dt husband wl locate u soonest in Jesus Name...amen.
Pls get advice and be well motivated as d anti-retrovirals can make u very sick too...bt its for good...u might beed to be off work for a couple of weeks...God bless u.
So sorry dear..just take it easy with urself like Stella told u..its gonna be fine
ReplyDeleteAwwwww so sorry about your case, may GOD grant you peace
ReplyDeleteSorry about this,so sad.Instead of waiting for six months why did you not start a Post-Exposure Prophylaxis (PEP) treatment immediately?. Should cost you in the range of N50K.You could still talk to you doctor and find out if it is not too late to start pep.
ReplyDeleteShe doesnt even need to spend money...its free in tertiary hosps and HiV counselling centres...atleast she can go to the PEPFAR clinic in luth...it is free and dey wl even follow her up, counsell and advise her shld anything happen.
DeleteShe is in Abuja
DeleteI wish I could tell my story too. I wonder why men rape women it's wickedness.
ReplyDeleteYou can; personally ive learnt something from this story. Not about travelling late (cos we all know that) but giving phone to bike man and acting totally lost and allow them lead the way especially at night. So send your story to Stella anonymously we are all here to learn thats why i love this blog. Lady koikoi
DeleteDear poster, please be calm. It's not the end of the world. God will see u thru dis. As for the rapist, the thunder that will fire him is still doing press up. It is well my dear.
ReplyDeleteLmaoooo. @ thunder doing press up.
DeleteDearest poster, it's well with you. Jus move on with your life.
Gosh,I feel so pained whenev I read such. Dear poster,I knw hw terrible u feel right nw. Jst manage and buckle up,belv me u wld gt a clean bill of health. U need frndz nw bt nt to disclose wot happnd,human beings are funny. Go out,meet ppl to hlp u cool off. Use ur fone (chat),watch movies,assure urslf u can gt ova dz mood,vry diffclt I knw. Bt u and u alone can do it.U need ppl around u nw,since family aint arund. Mk do wit d frnds and cheer urslf up. God wld surely punish d rapist,wld neva go unpunished. So sorry dear..
ReplyDeleteOh my God. This is not right. This rapist,I want to understand something,do they are their victims no the number of their conquest?Let Gods wrath be upon him. He won't go scot free. Like it wasn't enough to beat you and steal all you had but to rape you? He would be rapee thru his anus.
ReplyDeleteSorry dear,please do not tear yourself apart. I do not understand the pain you are going thru but God does,take it to him in prayers.. You will be fine. You wouldn't be infected okay. Its going to be hard for you not to think about it,infacts its going to be hard for you to deal with this but try. That's all you can do now. Try and pray
I don't even know how to advice you.
With all these rape stories I can't help buh say tnk u lord4me,hv bin a victim of close rape twice in a space of 2monthz in d same year(I cnt say itz d violence dt tearz thru me n makez me stand tall n fyt to finish)coz am sure d poster did same,buh God kept me,to add I was a virgin at dt time(n sure wasn't one dt galivantz abt)buh he was jst there!+poster,thru those periods I almost lost sanity,let alone u who went thru d ordeal,I pray for u this day,dt dt man wld knw no peace from dt day till he goes 6feet!B strong n get closest to God if u close!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry 2 hear dis poster, Buh u shld ve bin given post-exposure drugs in d hospital, & taken contraceptives 2 avoid pregnancy, I ope u were given dese drugs or dat hospital shld be closed down. Do take hold of urself & pray 2 God 2 cleanse u & give u courage. 2 fight d trauma.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for what happened to you dear poster. No body deserve to be raped. I think you need counselling by a professional. You need time to heal. Wipe your tears. God will see you thru. Remain bless.
ReplyDeleteAs for the rapist, he shall never know peace again.
So sorry dear.
ReplyDeleteYou need to dry your tears. Crying and being seclusive won't change a thing. You are only killing yourself the more. It has happened, it has happened.
Dust yourself up and even if its not easy, try removing the incident from your mind. By divine intervention, you won't test positive to HIV or any deadly deadly viral disease.
I wish i can see you in person. I live in Abuja too. Nyanyan to be precise. If you ever need to speak to someone or chat, please feel free. Am a matured woman with a matured mind. 07034794947, bbm pin 7991b2f8.
Hmmmm, if words can heal you of this pain sweetie I'll throw millions at you. I am so so sorry...I can understand this. I'll pray God heals you and comforts you. E-hearhugs darling. It is well and you won't come out HIV positive. Amen
ReplyDeleteThis is so sad.Dearie,wipe your tears please,let God grant you His strength,may He comfort you the way ONLY He can.I know you ask yourself ' Why you'??? Please,take things easy,don't lock yourself in and watch your life pass you by,go out,talk to people(you don't have to tell all what happened),find reasons to laugh again! As for the rapist,he won't escape God's judgement no matter how long it takes. Kai,my heart goes out to you,you are in my prayers.*e-bear hugs*
ReplyDeleteMy heart literarily broke for this poster, I'm so sorry. Don't worry,your test wud come out negative, all will be well. Allow God and time to heal you.
ReplyDeleteAmen. All will be well.
DeleteStella be using my comment to cook soup. Oriegwu!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMy dear. It is well d Lord will grant u perfect healing.
ReplyDeleteWe all need to be careful traveling at night. And we all need to learn how to defend ourselves like carrying pepper spray. Just saying
Does it mean if she takes the PEP treatment, she will not have it? Ie if she started immediately? I'm just asking. I feel so angry when I hear about rape cases cos it is really demoralising. I pray that man's dick is cut out like that Indian's own. My dear its not ur fault, but pls take it easy on yourself.
ReplyDeleteTo think that this is still happening here and there is sad. So sorry dear, the Almighty God will comfort you and bring back you loss physically and spiritually, just be strong.
ReplyDeleteTo think that this is still happening here and there is sad. So sorry dear, the Almighty God will comfort you and bring back you loss physically and spiritually, just be strong.
ReplyDeleteTo think that this is still happening here and there is sad. So sorry dear, the Almighty God will comfort you and bring back you loss physically and spiritually, just be strong.
ReplyDeleteTo think that this is still happening here and there is sad. So sorry dear, the Almighty God will comfort you and bring back you loss physically and spiritually, just be strong.
ReplyDeletewow this is just sad, just put yourself together, ud be fine, just think of what u will do to that bike man, go back to that area with people n im sure u will see him around if u saw his face then and get him arrested immediately, coz he will stil do same to other women if hez not stopped. #saynotorape
ReplyDeleteSo sorry @ Poster...proclaim health to ursef,speak positivity.The blood of Jesus will cleanse ur immunity system of any virus or infection IJN.
ReplyDeleteYou'l still go for a HIV test buh for nw,hand over evrytin 2 God and believe totally and deeply in ur heart dat Jesus has taken control of evrytin.
Ur nt alone in dis,Trust me...pls wipe ur tears..it is well
Pls visit my blog
Chinwenmeri.blogspot.com
If you need someone to talk to you can call me on this no: 07035964274. Just be strong and please be calm. It wasn't you fault, do u understand. I don't know you but I just felt angry and sad at the same time for you. But its all good.
ReplyDeleteYou will b fine dear. Sorry. God Almighty is ur strength and comforter. May God Almighty continue to protect and guide us from evil. Amen and Amen.
ReplyDeleteAm so sorry abt what happened poster...God wl be wt u.
ReplyDeleteBut this really gives me cause for concerns...first is it dat the hosp u went to dint know that u shld be on antiretrovirals and contraceptives by now (even if its 'morning after' pills?
Secondly aw can a graduate in Nigeria not be well exposed/aware to know that even if u dont go to hosp...d next tin after rape is to ensure u prevent pregnancy and STIs...I dont even knw wat d content of ur visit to d doctor was and wat tests did dey do?..were dey expecting to find sometin within a few hrs??..I knw ppl wl say she might be too weak or downcasted to do anything but u see if the awareness is der...dt wl be wat her sisters or friends wl be doing...and dt wl be wat everybody on SDK wl be saying instead of just praying and cursing...
Thirdly...did u get a medical report???...and also u cld av lodged the complaint...whether in lagos, abuja or kogi...it wl only serve as a proof for the future...u dont even knw wat can come out of it...
How on earth do we tackle all des things? ??..inasmuch as we want to fight rape...it wl not reduce to zero per cent..it stll happens in developed and secure world...and even d perpetrators stl go free or undiscovered. ..bt wat we can minimise more effectively is d impact but physical and psychological. .
I know sometimes we talk abt some health topics on this blog bt it is nt enough. ..
I once suggested we have a weekly segment where we talk about one disease on this blog but only two people commented that day...iam happy to do it as a medic but I need two or more docs on this blog so we can ensure it is regular...a society where ppl wl rather av sat and sund laffs over health awareness topic is lost for hope...
Stella pls look into this...it is more/better than giving ppl money or bags...it is empowering them as individuals. ...God wl help us...
Dr i notice u are pretty quick to judge here but op does not need that. She narrated her experience but she didnt go into details concerning the treatiment plan other than saying she was told to return in six months time after the window period. Now does that mean she was not given money after pill and what else?
DeleteGood suggestion about the health segment. I am eager to learn; stella this is a great idea.
Dear poster, I can't even imagine what you are going through....the lord God is your strength and your healer. Talking about it helps....it is the first step to healing. Start PEP immediately and continue to pray to God. By his grace you will not come out positive.
ReplyDeleteSo so sorry dear.
ReplyDeleteI'm short of words.
I promise to put you in my prayers.
Sighs
You won't test positive by God's grace.
Please don't blame yourself for what happened.
It wasn't your fault.
Be rest assured that God will fish out that man and deal with him. He can't escape GOd's wrath.
God is your strength.
The Lord is your strength... Be strong in the Lord and in the power of his might
ReplyDeleteThat's true! There's Post exposure prophylaxis. Poster go to a teaching hospital , one with PEPFAR facilities prefarably n get ur PEP free. Free or not, just try to take 'em ok.. The side effects are outta this world, but its better than just waiting. Kpele. *more hugs*
ReplyDeleteAs a rape victim, I understand what you are talking about. I can't say how bad u must feel cos I know who raped me. (doesn't make it less painful though)
ReplyDeleteMy dear it took me close to six years to heal and yes I still have a few effects from that. (phobia for sex)
How did I heal? I finally found that all I did to get over it, didn't work. But forgiveness, true forgiveness was what healed me. Sounds cliche, but that is what worked and constant worship with God. Please dear check for pregnancy again cos I did the same thing u did, checking the next day (didn't know it's not how pregnancy works) and 2 weeks later, I turned out to be pregnant. (19 years old church girl had no clue what and how sex worked) So u can imagine my confusion and misery. Anyway dear I'm sure if u told the medics that it was rape, they will take care of all. But be strong hun. Pray without ceasing, that will help u to forgive, which will lead to your healing. And for every guy u meet in future that will be interested in you, please don't be ashamed, tell him. That should be one of the 1st things u do. I have come to realize, that men are not as shallow as we think.
Love u sister. And Christ's love rest on you
I am Soo happy u won baby!
Delete* bear hugs*
I'm so touched.. May the good Lord continue to bless you....but emergency contraception should have been instituted
DeleteThank u dearies. I honestly didn't have a clue on what to do. But that is the past now.
DeleteI also advocate that sex eduction should be considered for both teenagers and youths cos if I had one, I probably would know what to have done.
I am glad you are stronger and better today. Thanks for sharing your story here. I am sorry to ask and i understand if you don't wish to answer but did you keep the pregnancy?
DeletePoster,the good lord will comfort you. IJN you won't and never be HIV positive, Let the great avenger and perfect judge our Lord jesus christ fight your battle.
ReplyDeleteDear poster, God will heal your spirit, and wipe away your tears.
ReplyDeleteThat robber/rapist will bite more than he can chew, soonest.
My prayer for him...He will rob and rape a ghost someday.
That day, he will use his eyes to see his brains.
God bless you, bv.
It is well.
I'm really short of words, may God heal u n will make d HIV test come out negative in Jesus name
ReplyDeleteDarling poster, my eyes were teary while reading this. Pls hand everything over to God, He will heal you with time. Hugs..
ReplyDeleteSo sorry dearie may God heal you! I still can't get why a man born by a woman would still rape a woman...That okada man would pay for this dnt worry.
ReplyDelete*Sweetness*
Oh dear, so sorry about your encounter. It is well in Jesus name, Amen. I stay in Abuja too and if u need someone to talk to please I am available this is d least I can do. I am not a counsellor or someone who has passed through what u experienced but I know what it feels to b all alone when going through pains. God bless you and heal your pains.
ReplyDeleteMy heart is so broken..Be strong dear...God will give you justice..Please dnt cry anymore..Take the advice of those who have suggested you take proactive measures to safeguard urself. God will heal ur heart my darl
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, the Lord is ur strength during this period cos no matter the sorries u hear wont make u feel better. Cry to God and leave all to Him. I dont know what it feels like to be raped but i know how it feels to all alone. I leave in Abuja just incase u need a friend, dats d least I can do. God bless and heal u.
ReplyDeleteStop crying please
ReplyDeleteThose bike men along Kogi-lokoja axis are the worst.
You were supposed to be given PEP to prevent you from having HIV. They were suppose to give you certain antibiotics to prevent infections.
Dear...you will not contract Hiv
Your belief matters a lot.
You won.
XOXO MYSTERY
The bastard! The son of a whore ! God i am so angry!
ReplyDeleteOMG! Linda don't sound insensitive now c'mon!
ReplyDeleteanything could have happened.
she may have left her base early and due to delay of some sort she arrived late.
you can't guarantee your time of arrival when you are travelling in a public vehicle. don't blame her.
Dear poster, so so sorry about this episode. what a traumatic experience it must have been.
good thing is, you can even talk about it. you are on the right path to your healing
I pray the HIV test comes out negative.
pls try to put this behind you.
it is well.
very tight hugs
Sorry abt your situation dear...but in all we shld learn lessons from this...ist is not travelling to a strange place at night, kogi is just 2hrs 30mins from abuja...u shld have gone during the day
ReplyDeleteSecond is getting the right solution for things...after a rape u shld be given pregnancy preventing drugs and also the PEP...u shld also be able to tell if you had unprotected sex dear cos if the guy released inside you the sperm doesn't just disappear...
We all shldnt take things and our safety for granted
Oh My Poor Poor Darling!
ReplyDelete*biggest bear hug for u*
M Sooo sorry baby.
I know how hurt,Sad and dejected u feel
Wipe ur tears Hun
Wipe dem
Allah has heard u
He has started fighting for u
I say Dry Dose tears sweetheart
Dry dem
This too Shall Pass,okay?
You are still YOU
Beautiful you,sweet and still decent
We wont give dat hooligan Power over u.
No! We refuse it!
He has lost! Cos he hasnt broken u.
Buh he just brought d wrath of God on himself!
He Shall suffer all d days of his life!
And wen he dies miserably,vultures wil feast on his body!Not Even in death will he find Peace.
At dis point,i dont think its wise for u to be alone.i understand too u dont want ur friends knowing...its normal.
I am a complete stranger and from d depth of ma broken heart,i offer u to come stay wit me in my house til dis nightmare recedes.
M stepping out on faith and if its ok by u,Let me know and we wil Work it out.
I am Soo sorry honey!
You are such a wonderful person, God bless you.
DeleteGod bless u sis
DeleteDon't I just love you The General's wife?You may be harsh sometimes but still a darling at heart and above all I love your sweet sense of humour.
DeleteYou have a fan here.
Betty.
Truth be told, one man and I will continue to say it, one man without any form of weapon cannot rape a full fledged woman just like dat. Abeg all these pple always crying rape na wah for una. In dis age of HIV u want to tell u couldnt fight with d last drop of your blood? Abeg a lot of women like sex and as soon as d see dick d are weakened and as a result d give in then after it will done on them and d regrets and fear now creeps in, d next thing d start crying rape. How is it easy easy just like dat? Even when d action is going on what do u do? U just lie down there enjoying it abi? and allow him finish it abi? Okay una dey try eeh!
ReplyDeleteYou are a bastard for this comment, may you and every female in your generation be rape victime oloshi, Oloriburuku, oloribu, alailanu.
DeleteI dey vex seriously
God punish u for dis statement
DeleteIt's like you're slowly running MAD! Dumb ass
DeleteAnonymous! You are the most insensitive creature I have had the misfortune of coming across her comment here..
DeleteIt is not fair! It is not fair! Why are you this mean? Whyyyyy!
Why do you think a younger brother with an age difference of 2years can beat you to a pulp with ease? And that is your blood relative ooh!
Please delete this post or apologise to this woman! You are wicked!
i pity u!
DeleteIt will get 2 u. Infact a dwarf will rape u. Stupid thing.
DeleteYou made a lot of sense in your mind abi? oya take your gold medal, run your mouth all you want but i pray it doesn't happen to you.
DeleteIt is not your fault, it is your lack of exposure and sense that causes you to think this way. It is not worth even trying to explain it to you because you do not havw enough functioning brain cells to comprehend.Just go back to LIB or nairaland where you will find people to cosign this rubbish
DeleteIf you don't have anything reasonable to say please put a plug to it and just shut up. Nonsense. @poster I'm so sorry. Take the drugs that people have advised, come out of your room n live. Live for you. U r a survivor. Take some weeks off work n go to your family OK n heal. God bless u
Deleteyou must be an insensitive fool. and may you and any female member of your family be raped even through the anus. do u even think. how dare u say a woman gives into sex and cries rape or she cannot fight. God punish u. i am 5 ft 1 and i was rapes by a man over 6ft and very built. do u think i did not fight but how can i have tge energy to defeat such a man. so i enjoyed sex with the armed robber and after i decided to cry rape. how old was i. i was 15 and a virgin. how can any woman lose her virginity in such a manner up till now i still cry and it has been 10years chai. may rape be your portion. what happens to the little kids being raped do they enjoy it. it shall be your portion so you will know if u will enjoy the sex.
DeleteMoronic anon 12:54 p.m, when the women who will spring forth from your sperm/egg begin to suffer for no just cause, they'll never, in their wildest imaginations, believe that you, their insensitive ancestor, brought the curse upon them.
DeleteMay God have mercy on your empty brain and reimburse your sponsors for the money wasted in sending you to acquire education.
Tufiakwa gi!
Ghosh I pray u experience what's painful dan RAPE....u so heartless and u also think backward jeeez
DeleteThe best thing that has happened in Edo state. Was the total ban of odada riders.... I am deeply saddened by your experience poster and very sorry too, wishing you quick recovery.
ReplyDeleteI'm soooo sorry to hear this. Wish I could give you a hug too.
ReplyDeleteStella, this is really a problem in Nigeria o! Too many young women getting raped and most rapists get away with it. Please I want to advise young ladies not to walk when it is dark, either in the early hours of the morning or late at night. If you don't have a car, please wait for daylight unless you are sure your area is very safe. Or engage the service of a trusted cab person, if you don't get paid enough to engage a cab, move closer to your office area, either with a friend or a rented apartment, if you cant afford to do that, please, that job is not worth it
All I'm doing now is sending angels to hold you, stay with you and carry you through this trying time. Hold on to God. You will not have HIV. You will come back here to testify. *Hugs*
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for what you are going through. You HAVE to take care of your physical health. I hope you were given medications in the hospital you went to. Meds to prevent pregnancy, STIs and HIV Post exposure prophylaxis. ( go to general hospital it's free there ).
ReplyDelete@anon 12.54,if u r a lady may u be rape I cursed u 4 sayg dat,do u knw wat rape means? Talking rubbish up n dwn,must u comment? If u r a man may ur sister b rape so dat wen u knw d pains involved in rape u will alwas kip ur mouth shout.nonsense,enjoy sex 4rm a total stranger n bike man,lunatic
ReplyDeleteI can't begin to say I know how you feel because I don't, take it to God in prayers, talk to an elderly person you trust and respect and then seek counselling and take it easy on yourself. .This is definitely not the end of the world for you, it is well
ReplyDeleteWarmest hugs. Dry your tears, hun. It wasn't your fault. Please, hang in there ok?
ReplyDelete***HEALING-RAIN***
ReplyDeletePoster my deepest sympathy. If you need someone to talk to,apart from your friends,l live in Abj,l can reach out to you whereever you are within the city. I pray God heals you.
BVs resident in Abj pls let's get to know one another and be on the look out for each other just incase. Prettychick,abeg make we try see this weekend.
I am a regular blog commenter but I Have to go anon on this one. A tear dropped while I read this. Same thing happened to me two years ago. I went for a shoot and on my way back. The driver pulled out a gun, knocked me off, beat me up. I lost my virginity I've been keeping for 21 yrs to a total stranger that night. He had sex n anal sex n dump me in the bush all night. I can't bear a man's touch since then. I wish I could console the poster but I still cnt find d words to console myself 2 years after. It is well
ReplyDeleteAwwww dis revelation is touching, sorry dear and try and get over it...Virgin or not believe me u can still find d right man...ur story is sad but better those who lost dia lives yesterday. ...
DeleteSoo heartbreaking...
DeleteI just whisphered a prayer for u baby.
It is really well wit u.
Hold d Faith!
Kai. Just had goose pimples. So sorry luv.
DeleteSorry to hear about your rape.
ReplyDeletePlease go back to that hospital or any reputable hospital in Abuja.
There are anti-rape drugs that ought to be administered to you. They will help prevent you from catching any STD, HIV and even getting pregnant.
Please do this as soon as possible.
Remain blessed
This your culled image is becoming annoying. please get over it.
ReplyDelete28“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
ReplyDelete"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.
…21Jesus said to her, "Woman, believe Me, an hour is coming when neither in this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. 22"You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23"But an hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers.…
BABY GET A COPY OF "THE NEW TESTAMENT" AND FIND INSPIRATION, COMFORT AND ETERNAL LIFE FOR YOUR SOUL.
God will see you through
ReplyDeleteIn February this year, an armed robber broke into my house took my jewelries and money and still went ahead to rape me. My husband was away nd I was home with my househelp nd sister in law. Lookin back now and thinking about the whole incident, I believe the evil man was alone and had no accomplice even though he kept talking to someone, whom I didn't see as he kept hitting me, telling me dat he ll shoot me if I dare look up. The nxt morning, I went to d hospital, confided in my doctor and was immediately placed on PEP nd other antibiotics. Only three persons knew about my ordeal. My sister, my husband and my doctor. I wasn't about to let myself become the talk of the town. It was the worst experience so far in my life. The PEP drug was something else. Few mins after taking it, and it will seem as if I was thrown into an oven but I endured it. I knew I was fighting for my life. God was gracious to me and 3 post PEP tests all came out negative.
ReplyDeleteDuring those six months, that I waited to have all d confirmatory tests done, I was just a mess. I cried almost everyday, that was when I got to know the true meaning of depression. I couldn't stand my husbnd's touch, I cringed each time he tried to touch me. When I see young men on the road, fear nd shame will envelop me cos I ll be wondering if he was d person that raped me. It was tough. But with time, I healed. I still have a moments of anguish but I just told myself that I have to be grateful to God nd let go. I counseled myself, stripped myself naked one night and laid a curse on that man that raped me. Even though stories like this makes me remember the incident and become sad but I choose to look on d bright side nd be grateful to God for atleast saving me from the diseases that I could have caught.
Dear poster, God will give u that same miracle he gave me. He will save u from any disease, he will heal ur wounds nd bruised mind. He will restore your joy. Just trust him. Let him hold ut hand through this dark valley and be rest assured that u will see the light again.
I just had goose bumps reading ur sad story...goose pumps from my head.
DeleteM Soo sorry dis happend to u.and very happy u rose above it sister.
*sending u warm hugs*
You're indeed a strong woman..It was just like I was feeling your pain as I read your narrative. I've never been raped before but I got married as a virgin and even sex when you're not completely wet can be really painful not to talk of rape. My dear, God will heal you further and bless you and your family.
DeleteDear poster, it is well with you. Go for the PEP immediately and emergency contraception. My heart was bleeding as I read your story. Evil lurks and lives amongst us. There are some people that when they're going through tribulations in life, one will not know what evil deeds they've done in the Past such as this poverty stricken rapist.
My dear, God who is the sustainer will give you that strength to forgive and heal. 'Surely with every difficulty comes ease' . Masha Allah you'll be fine. I'll remember you in my prayers dear.
Ennie
Am so sorry to hear ur story and it is only someone who has been thru the same thing that can understand how u feel rite now. Don't allow ur situation get to you and pls go back to the hospital so u can be treated properly against STDs esp HIV( I pray it will never be ur portion) its not easy to forget but with time u will learn to let go. In a country like 9ja where we don't ave shrinks ,u ave to heal on your own. Pls pray to God that he helps u overcome and continue to keep busy ,with time u can forgive and move on. E hugs to u dear
ReplyDeleteSorry poster, the lord will heal your wound but the rapist we never have any thing good his life. Pain will be his food from now on. Ko tun se re re mo laye.
ReplyDeletesorry dear,hope u were started on PEP Posy exposure prophylaxis for hiv.u dont hv to wait 6 mths to take the drugs for hiv
ReplyDeleteIts so sad that a lot of people feel that one man can't rape a lady. I can only say that may it never happen to you,your wife or sister.
ReplyDeleteA few years ago,I was a naive 16yr old girl travelling from abuja to ph to look for admission. I got to the park by 6am but the bus didn't fill up till 10. To make make matters worse,it kept on developing faults so we didn't get to Warri till 11pm. The driver said he wouldn't go further that night. We all had to lodge in a hotel. To cut a long story short,I was brutally raped by a fellow traveller that night in my hotel room. Did I struggle? I struggled to the death but he tore my clothes and knocked me unconscious. When I woke up, I was naked and bleeding.
I was advised to take Postinor-2 by my friend which I took immediately yet 2 weeks later, I found that I was pregnant. I'm not proud of it but I had an abortion. I didn't have the courage to have an HIV test till five years later. Luckily,it was negative.
That singular rape act has affected me. I haven't been able to have a relationship since then. I'm still praying and taking it one day at a time.
My dear, sometimes things we cant explain happen to us.It was bad that you were raped, but it could have been worse! Thank God for the gift of life.By God's grace, you will be disease free, and the Lord will heal your broken heart.May God grant your heart desires concerning having a beautiful home.May he take you through this situation, make you a stronger and better woman.God bless n keep you!
ReplyDeletehmmmmm..so sad.. Pele, God be with and heal u completely.
ReplyDeleteAs at the time of writing this, there were 128 comments/replies & I read through each one carefully. SDK's BVs are just one big helpful & considerate family & may God continue to bless & protect each & everyone of us. Everything has been said buy I'll just add a little bit on the HIV/depression aspect coz I can relate with it. Two years ago I feared or rather believed I was infected with HIV & naturally, depression/restlessness set in. How did I cope? I exercised my faith, confided in few trusted friends, read up every article on HIV I could find online. To cut a long story short, I tested -ve the first three months & finally seven months after. I'll never forget in a hurry the mental torture I passed through & how my faith in God helped me pull through. So, dear poser, doesn't matter if you're a Muslim or Christian, this is the time to activate your faith in who you believe in & speak positive words to your entire being. Confide in someone, a good friend, especially one who is around you & can always give you moral, spiritual support & a shoulder to lean on whenever you need it. It ain't easy but wallowing in self-pity or regrets will only worsen your situation. Get actively involved in your business/work. Meanwhile, follow the other counsels you've been given here on PEP & please, as a general rule, never travel to a place for the first time late or without making arrangements with someone on ground to receive you; I'm again speaking from experience on this. God grant you total healing & make all your fears become a thing of good testimony. Stay strong.
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous of October 12, 2014 at 12:54 PM: Your post is so Insensitive and low. If you dont have any nice thing to say you can zip it. Dont come under anonymous and right rubbish. Only the person who wears the shoe knows how it feels. I hope no one in your family goes through that ordeal.
ReplyDeleteTravelling through Lokoja once we got into a hold up that lasted for more than 4hrs, meanwhile on my way to Osun State. So anything could have happened.
Dear poster, behind every dark cloud there is a silver lining. Ask God to forgive to help you forgive. Vengeance is of the Lord. I tell you there is no peace for the wicked. Some people dont know that when terrible things happen to them, its the seed they have sown they are reaping. Wipe your tears, pray, get people you can talk to and heal. However, Jesus can heal you of the pain, and remove the scar. That is His specialty. God bless.
No, you not have to wait for 6months there is a HIV test called early detection test that can detect a virus after two weeks, my husband goes for it anytime I feel he has gone on one of his escapades with men, with men.
ReplyDeleteHuh? Is your hubby gay
DeleteThis is so painful. Dry your tears dear. The culprit will not triumph, he will be punished and that's a promised. I feel so sorry for you...so so sad. Can you imagine the wicked soul! May he burn in Hell for this and may he never find peace forever. Dry your tears my dear, God will turn your tears to joy soon. I'll be praying for you.
ReplyDelete