Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives - Friday!

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Friday, October 31, 2014

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narratives - Friday!


Jealous husband and the ex who wants to be in the present.....na waaaah!

Juicy stories you cant get nowhere else......






NARRATIVE NUMBER ONE
CHRISTIAN WIFE WITH A HUBBY WHO STALLS PROGRESS.
Stella, 
Please publish this. I want people to tell me if I'm insane or I'm taking things a bit too far. I have noticed over the years that my husband doesn't like my progress. Anytime he sees that I am about to achieve something, he stops it.

I recently got a job. BTW I have a Masters degree and he has been discouraging me from working. So I looked for a part-time job that will still allow me care well for him and the kids. Stella, when I was searching for the job, I told him and he agreed. As soon as I got it, his language changed. He was totally against me working. As a Christian woman, I had to succumb to him. I called my prospective employers and called it off.

Now he doesn't want me to get a Driver's License. We live in the U.S and it is important to know how to drive. My kids miss important engagements because I can't take them there when he's at work. I can actually drive and when going out with him, I drive most of the time. For some reason he keeps pushing my test forward giving flimsy excuses. 

I am pregnant and really wanted to get my license before baby comes. Yet, he is doing the same thing, stopping me. I feel terrible. I have cried, prayed, cried prayed and now I want to leave him. I feel like I have been imprisoned here in his house. Please what do I do?

Thank you and God bless all those who will help me with their words.



Why is he like that?Have you done something in the past that makes him not want to give you total freedom?I always say that the beauty in being married is realising that you have to set the other person free to pursue their own dreams.
Na wah oh!
I am not going to advise you to sit him down and talk with him.Do what gives you peace.
Wicked man..I CANT DEAL ABEG!


............................................................................................................


NARRATIVE NUMBER TWO
EX FACTOR
I am married with a baby, but my ex still keeps in touch with me. He is a nice guy and I think he might still have feelings for me even though he is also married.
I tried to be causal with him but he has also kept in touch and I think he has a good heart and is doing fine in all aspect and he desires us to be family friends as we are not in the same state,but I think his wife does not like the Idea.

I told my hubby about him in the past and he also does not feel safe, He is a Christian and he said he can never cheat on his wife that he meant no harm, he shares virtually every issues about himself.... career,investment etc and expected me to share issues with me as a friend but i am just been careful.
In the past we shared our intimate moments and thinking back, I enjoyed the ecstasy we shared.

I am confused if I should open up to him or not, He is a great guy so BV please don’t cuss him out.



*HIAN!!!...smell the coffee honey..Okafor's law states that ''once a lover always a lover''..Do you wanna find out for yourself?.keep the wall if you do not want to
re-open the hole for him to shoot the golf ball inside abeg.

See how you are already revisiting the past and old ecstasy?..





117 comments:

  1. ANGELRAY SAID
    @1 Your husband is a wizard,
    @ 2 mind ur family and leave ur ex alone, trouble no good ooh

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @ 1, what does your husband do? Also, if you are more educated more than him wahala dey, coz he will use anything and everything to bring you down, I live in the US, I went thru d same thing until I figured it out he was bent on reducing me to guguru, na I pick race. So decide on what you want to do fast b4 it's too late, and with baby no 3, ur own Don finish without work, money in d bank or help. Smell d coffee b4 d kettle burn. Good day Tafia from NY.

      Delete
    2. @1 since u have little kids, it's ok not to work for now, but the driving is very necessary! I didn't tell my husband until d day of my practical driving test and after I passed he asked if that was my priority? I just ignored him!

      Delete
    3. N1 wat u described is d typical behaviour of the men from my town.. Fortunately u live in a civilised country.. You will not leave ur marriage.. Infact erase that tot frm your mind leave for who.. For what.. Abeg what u will do is change from being a mumu christian wife to a stubborn wife.. U want to get a license, go ahead! wen u get it smile broadly and tell him honey I have a surprise for u.. Tara.. My license! He will not kill u at most he will sulk for a few days.. If he's angry put on ur best am sorry face but d next day drive out happily.. Give it a couple of weeks and he will stat askng u to help him drive somewhere and do something for him.. You want to work abi get a part time job for now dat ur kids are young.. Wake up in d morning as he's preparing and start preparing too.. Go to work make sure your house is in order he will seeth for a bit and cool down.. U want to shave ur hair.. oya go to d barber and get it done .. STOP askng for permission u are not a child neither are u his slave..You Only Live Once!
      N2 face ur marriage and leave ur Ex alone.. Nicely text him dat he shouldn't contact u again.. If it was ur husband and his ex how will u feel abeg respect oga..

      Delete
    4. Thank you jare, mumu Christian wife in 2014, you better wake up! The world has evolved.

      Delete
    5. My dear poster 1, most a times, men in he US behave like that because they are scared you will leave them when you start making money. You hear of nurses being killed by their husbands. All I can advise you is to sit him down and explain to him because you might have unknowingly shown him some behavior that made him feel you will change when you start making money. Try and show him, you care and love him and that way he will trust you as his wife. All the best. Felly from MD

      Delete
    6. It's great to be a Christian. The issue here is that the woman misunderstood scripture. Submission from the woman should coincide with complete love from the man. As Christians our obedience is to God alone and nowhere in the Bible are we asked to obey man.God forbid your husband leaves you or dies, you'll wish you kept that job. Think of your kids my dear. You man is not godly and thus you must not submit to him.

      Delete
    7. N1. Sweetie Sweetie, get a license if u want one. But I can't tell u to go get a job if he doesn't approve of it. What to do? Very simple. Ask him to pay u monthly allowance since u are his full time employee, albeit with benefits. That's all.

      N2. No we won't cuss him out, rather you'll get the whooping for engaging in a thought provoking "relationship", and a so called intended platonic family friendship whatever, with an ex whom both your partners are not comfortable with. So what again? Great weekend

      Delete
    8. N1, some men are like dat and you just have to take ur issues and solve them without asking for permission. Just give notice.

      N2. Stella has said it all.

      Delete
  2. Stella, I will advise you to be careful advising these lady. Like case no 1, the lady has not really explain the reason why. From her summarized story, we would all think her husband is a devil but when you hear his own story you begin to understand his view. Please it is dangerous to advise based on a one-sided story before we destroy someone's marriage.

    My hand no dey.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All I read on this blog is , I want to leave my husband, I want to cheat on my husband, men are evil. Yet they all wanna get married, nonsense. N1, when you leave your husband your eyes will clear, that spirit husband worrying you will desert you and men will f*ck you black and blue and collect that small change you have saved somewhere that is making your head to swell. If you want to leave him, leave him. Soldier go soldier come. Everytime I want to leave my husband.. I want to leave my husband... Who will lose ??? He will marry an new chasis wife, maybe even your best frnd.wonder why pple can't sort their issues out for good.

      Delete
    2. N1
      Few men allow their wives pursue their dreams. Very few.
      The men that don't allow their wives pursue a career or start a business are scared. Its not that they don't love their wives or want them to succeed
      They have probably envisioned that their wives destiny is great and if she us allowed to fly, she will blossom and make sooooooo much money. So such men are scared of loosing their spouse's respect and dependency, so they do what they can as humana: they cage the women! Not physical or spiritual caging ooo. They make it impossible for their spouse to earn money. Simple!
      You need to have a timeout with him. Don't quarel, don't nag, don't keep malice, don't think of him as evil. He isn't evil, he is just scared of yours impending success.
      Sit him down, as real talk, no distraction. Assure him that you won't stop being a good wife to him, aassure him that your working and earning income for yourself won't make you stop loving him or depending on him. Let him know that you only want to satisfy your innermost desire as a human, its normal for you to crave to work and earn money.
      Once your husband has been given enough reassurance, he will allow you work.
      Quarelling will not yield any positive result.
      You said you want to leave him because of that? Lol. I want to believe you wrote that out of anger.

      N2
      End communication with that man if you love your marriage. Abi u wan be wife and side chick too?

      Delete
    3. @anon 2:04
      Lmao....
      I can only imagine d way ur moutth is positioned while saying "I want to leave my husband"

      Delete
    4. Shut up your rotten mouth. See your head like soldier go soldier come. So if she leaves him she will die? There are no more men on earth? Only men are capable of moving on abi? Kindly shut the fuck up if you have nothing reasonable to say.

      Delete
    5. Anon2:04 i hail you oo. your head dey there. poster 2 if your ex was so good why didn't he marry you so you guys can still share life issues.

      Delete
    6. Poster 1, complete ur story (@ what point did ur husband start act dis way)?
      Poster 2, beware of ex !

      Delete
  3. Chizoba is that u? Pls leave dozie alone! He has married and moved on. Jeeez! Wat is wrong wit u?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lmao... Stella I like this Okafor's Law oh. so very true! Poster tell ur past ur present isn't happy abt him looking out for u. If he's that nice why did you break up? Abegi make we hear word. Unless ur feelings for him are coming bck

    ReplyDelete
  5. @ poster number 1 your husband is an enemy of progress. After this your pregnancy, go and do 5years family planning and endure for the kids to be grown a little then take your stand but be ready to see his other side.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Whether na the man carry her go America, so perhaps he's scared she'll make friends that'll turn her against him or his wishes. Shebi na here we dey begin read stories upon stories of Nigerian men who started to kill their wives who are nurses and earn more than them, just because they were losing grips on their wives at home. Inferiority complex is a devil on its own that will take the grace of God to conquer if ones' spouse possesses it. So maybe he falls in that category.

      Delete
  6. N1, Dis ur husband na wa o. May such men never come our way. Amen
    N2, you mumu sha. Pls why can't people be reasonable enuf to leave their ex's out of their lives? Na wa o. Like I always say, I don't have an ex. Once we break up, I DONT KNOW U

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Shut up! Smallie.
      Cos u don manage marry that your "Utong Ekpu" husband, U suddenly chop liver to dey call person mumu
      See as u dry pass stockfish. No go find beta food chop. Toothpick!!!

      Delete
    2. ROTFL @ 'utong ekpu' hahahahahaa shuuu??? Iko inua

      *Latoya Tots man where have you been? I've missed you ooo* mbok yan iso

      Delete
    3. Cme dis tooth pick, u still dey answer miss Gemini? No be 'Mrs'? Issorai. Kip calling smbdy Mumu wen ur marriage neva reash 1 whole month.

      Delete
  7. N1 you shouldn't stay in a marriage that will limit your chances in life....my advice, leave him cos one day he will make u beg for "grains" and it will be late to search for a job. Don't let anyone limit yourself in life besides gone where the days when men turn women to "remote control". If he can't accept ur success then he is not meant for u.
    N2 The moment u let him in, forget about your marriage cos he is just a devil in sheep clothing. Does he discuss everything about his life to his wife just the way he does to you? If u are in his wife position, will u want same? You are beginning to remember the ecstacy u both had way back....what does it tell u? u are definitely inviting trouble to your home. Past lovers will warm their way in and cause havoc. My dear u better end all communication with him and focus on your peaceful life b4 u regret your actions. Some past are better left behind to avoid destroying your future

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You advising a woman to leave her husband just because of her own greed. What else does she wants? She's pregnant with kids, so how's she gonna cope working at the same time. All because she wants freedom to be driving alone, showing off in her children school. Anyways, Stella the adviser too has many rolexs when your husband send you out she can send like two to rent a flat.

      Delete
    2. Leaving him seems like the easiest thing to do but think again. Why are so people so quick to advice others to leave their marriage? No wonder the rate of divorce is so high these days. Whatever happened to repairing a broken appliance than throwing it away. Please people should honour the marriage constitution and not check out fast like it's the best thing to do. Remember you have kids. Do you know how hard it will be for them? When you're divorced you'll be going about looking for dildo and vibrator. Sit your husband down and talk to him. Pray to God before you talk to your husband. There is nothing God cannot do. Besides do you have questionable character? Do you give your husband reason to not trust you? Are you submissive (not foolish....there is difference o)? Why do do think your husband acts that way? I think there is something more to it. Address that before you think of leaving him.
      Mama bon boy

      Delete
    3. Bimpe what do you mean by the poster's greedy?
      Greedy because she needs a licence? She's pregnant, and got kids aswell, is she complaining? If she dosent show off her children, who will?
      You sound like a very serious hater. You better ditch that your warped mentality and re-assess what you just wrote. If you don't have anything reasonable to say,move on!
      No be by force to comment!!

      Delete
    4. Greed? A woman wanting to grow is now termed "greed"? Chai. Women have suffered. Her ultimate goal in life is to marry and have children right? When yoga gets tired of her and leaves what will she have to show? How will she take care ofherself and her children if she iisn't independent? Use your brain sometimes.

      Delete
    5. na wa o,d way u peeps ar quik in sayin leav ur hubby amazes me,it makes me feel dere's an alterior motive 4 such advice weda u knw d person or not

      Delete
    6. Bimpe stupid fool.....are u for real? It's like you were born into a home where your mother was treated like a dog, so to u it's normal ......showing off in her children's school....lol.....egbami dis Bimpe is mental.....ur father must have dealt with u people growing up that ur brain is now messed up....

      Delete
    7. Quiksilver, I tried contacting u in d oda post where u complained abt being d only bv living in uyo.ur not alone oo, im here too though I jus moved here last year cos of marriage dnt hav any frens

      Delete
    8. Ah no o. She shouldn't leave her husband just yet o biko. That's too extreme ke. The issue hasn't escalated to that. Your advice for N2 is spot on though.

      Delete
    9. I'm so with Bimpe on this one (ok I admit it may because of her killer look and swag). I guess that's how women in technology and Eng'g think. Look guys, in marriage u gotta let some things go if only temporarily. The woman didn't say her husband abuses her or fails to do what he's supposed to do. Ok we know that's not all but give it some time, be a happy homemaker and begin to think outside the box;there's a whole lot u can do from home like Stella. Sis,on this one, don't listen to Stella o.
      PS: Bimpe arrange contact nah, let's put technology to work. ;)

      Delete
  8. N2: Women are sometimes the architect of their problems. If the guy leaves you now, you will run to SDK and rant that men are this and that. You want to be family friends with your ex? Are you high on something?

    ReplyDelete
  9. BV 1- dont let me call you a mumu oh. Your husband is selfish and doesn't love you. And you are using Christianity to be gullible. The fact that you live in the US should make you smart and have an advantage sef. You are just a baby maker to him..find your way out

    BV2- you are a confused woman and dont know what you want. Keep playing with fire.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Narrative one: Threaten your husband with divorce, his brain will adjust back to normal.
    Narrative two: Please share intimate things with him oh, while at it you can try to rekindle your love affair again. You have a husband but you're lusting for your ex. If it was that good, why didn't you guys ended up married? That's how trouble will be sleeping and yanga will wake him up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ekpa, you're telling her to threaten her husband with divorce. When he tells her to go who will be the fool? Duh, like that's the answer. You are obviously young and single hence the advice. Please don't take that attitude to marriage o. You think you're wise, don't end up being the fool with your tail between your legs.

      Mama bon boy

      Delete
    2. It might backfire o. He might ask her to file for the divorce and he will sign or he will go ahead and file...

      Woman,know thee how best to follow your husband. You have been married to him for a while now,you live with him and know how his likes and dislikes.. Please look for his mumu botton and press. Everyone has a mumu bottom. That botton you press and they dance according to your tune. Sometimes put it in a way that it seems like its their idea.
      Maybe he doesn't want you driving now because you are pregnant and doesnt want any harm to come to you. How many cars do you have? If you have more than one then ask him to get a driver for you if he doesn't want you to drive. If its only one then how will he go to work if you are home with the car.

      As for working,wait,when you put to birth and the baby is grown enough to go to creche,then reapply for a job. I am sure he will agree.

      Its hard for a man to allow you work if you are pregnant,that's if you were not working before that's why its good to get a job before the babies start coming,that way,his mind is already programmed that your maternity leave is for 3months but if you are not working and get pregnant,they wouldn't allow it and would want you to finish bringing up your kids before going back to work.


      Second poster,why are you remembering the days with your EX,now that's unholy. Cut off ties with him immediately before you bring harm to your home.

      Delete
  11. poster 2 what if your husband was d one doing nd having d same feeling to an Ex as you are doing, am so sure u will bring d story here and start crying nd cursing d side chick /mistress. but thank God you are d one feeling dis way now so just respect Ur self and Ur hubby nd face Ur family. cut any contact with d ex nd mind Ur damn buisness biko.

    ReplyDelete
  12. N1, your husband is not a good man i know his type, if you were just dating i would have advised you dump him, he is a wizard. You are married with kids so….N 2, You are very annoying, do ahead and cheat on your husband already. mumu.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Poster one, sorry to say this, but your hubby sounds like an enemy of progress; one of those men that don't want their wives to progress in case she 'stops being submissive'.

    Xtian on not, make sure you're firm and fair with him, stand your ground and pursue your dreams.
    Don't let him leave you high and dry in case things go sour in future. My 2 cents.

    Click my name for all your celebration cakes and cupcakes, cheers

    ReplyDelete
  14. Poster 1
    your husband is insecure. Most men feel that once a woman is independent of them financially and all of that, they do not have a strong hold over her. that is what he is scared of.
    He wants to limit you so that you can run to him for everything. He wants to be in charge, total control of you. mtchew!


    Poster 2.

    the best thing you can ever do for yourself is STAY AWAY FROM YOUR EX if you do not want to breed trouble.

    ...and remember 'na from clap dem take de enter dance.'
    Be guided!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't mind poster 2. Let her be there reliving past ecstasies.....rubbish

      Delete
    2. @ bloglord, good points. But what do you think she can do? Because alot of people are saying "she should leave" is DAT a good advise.

      Delete
    3. Bloglord, its similar view i gave her ooo. The man is just scared of her getting richer than him and becoming independent. This behaviour though it appears devilish isn't really as bad as it looks. Her husband will calm down and let her work if she goes gentle with him.
      Even if they separate, the man can still go spiritual and hurt her if he wants to. The best thing is to patiently try and understand the man's fears and handle the entire situation with the highest level of wisdom.

      Delete
    4. She really needs divine grace, i swear. It is well with her marriage.

      Delete
  15. Narrative one, please sit ur bae down n talk sense into him. Try to patch things up between u too in a gentle manner, dnt be a divorcee honey.
    Number two dnt go bk to ur ex, he is now in the past. Dnt know y some ladies like attaching stupidly to their ex even after marriage n if u check well, their ex is no where near their husbands in terms of comparism. Face ur marriage, dnt act foolish n send an annoying story later to sdk cos I will surely enjoy laughing at you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol. Anytime I see "sit ur husband down" it makes me laugh. Everyone here including Stella can like to give such advice ehn. Am sure she did that before coming here. Hopefully so

      Delete
  16. lol@revisiting the past and old ecstasy.........

    ReplyDelete
  17. Well, I think you should talk with him. Let him know you are not happy with his attitude towards you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahahahahaha, i can see you. Welcome on board!

      May God bless your hustle.

      Delete
    2. @Rosad: I support you. The Bible says wisdom is a principal thing in all thy getting, get understanding. Apply wisdom. No do gra gra o. If you Waka commot anoda person go Waka inside.

      Delete
  18. #1,all I can say is na waa,orisirisi men with different character. #2,since you said he has all these good qualities why didn't u get married to him in the first place?

    ReplyDelete
  19. Poster 1,
    Did u court ur husband at all?
    U ddnt know ur husband wz domineering rite 4m d start.
    like seriously, women complain too much abt smthg dey percieved 4m d beginning n yet enterd.

    As for ur husband e is a foolish man, tel him e wld get u in2 trouble soon. If care is not taken u wld end up like my pretty aunt whose husband siezed her cert, died of cancer 3mnths ago,left her wit 5kids, numerous properties dat she can't touch n turnd her in2 a begger.(I Pray nothing happens to ur hubby doe. )

    ReplyDelete
  20. 1st narrative, you've done your best trying to please your hubby, its time to do what you really want, go for your license without his knowledge..even if he finds out he wont kill u.
    2nd nsrrative, ur ex remains ur ex, since ur spouse and his dont feel safe about the whole idea, please drop it. let the friendship be distant, so you dont fall into temptation in the future.

    ReplyDelete
  21. poster 2 if it was Ur husband doing d same thing nd feeling same thing you will bring Ur story here in tears cursing d side chick/ mistress. use Ur hand nd scatter Ur family biko, msheeeew. poster 1 keep talking to Ur hubby I won't advise u sitting nd doing nothing I no make sense at all.

    ReplyDelete
  22. poster 2 if it was Ur husband doing d same thing nd feeling same thing you will bring Ur story here in tears cursing d side chick/ mistress. use Ur hand nd scatter Ur family biko, msheeeew. poster 1 keep talking to Ur hubby I won't advise u sitting nd doing nothing I no make sense at all.

    ReplyDelete

  23. Narrative number 1: I pray God gives you the wisdom to handle the issues wisely because it is a delicate matter and I can't say why your husband is feeling insecured. Narrative Number 2: I don't know what you left behind that you want to go back and pick and if you were so special to him, he should have settled down with you.As a matter of urgency discontinue further communication with him because okafor's law is potent and still active. Let the guy face his family and you face yours so that OJUKOKORO will not have a way in your life.WETIN YOU DEY FIND WEY GOD NEVER DO FOR YOU? Ciao.

    ReplyDelete
  24. some husbands are just cruel..thats why i dont blame most of our singles ladies who r working their ass out to earn something good for themselves...nowadays marriages are like promises not fulfilled

    visit my blog

    www.glowysofiscated.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  25. To Narrator 2:
    There's time for everything...
    TIME TO MOVE ON...

    ReplyDelete
  26. 2nd narrative are you a learner? He will make your hubby leave and he will remain with his wife! He is agreat guy why una no marry? Abeg make I hear word joor!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Poster N2 I don't think that it's ideal for a married woman to be close to her ex. Will you be happy if your husband's ex wants to be family friend with you and husband? It's ok to say hi when you bump into each but calling each other is a no no for me.

    ReplyDelete
  28. 1] Ma'am I believe in prayers but in this ur case I don't think wat u need is prayers,I think u need to wake up from ur slumber nd take control of ur life...u need to face ur husband nd be fierce while at it,he has controlled u enuf nd u need to show him dat ur not under his spell anymore nd he can't kip dictating to u wat he wants u to do or not (so far as its nothing wrong). U are freaking educated for crying out loud nd u live in a free country like America yet ur acting like an african slave wife...ur hubby is an enemy of progress to u nd u nid to take charge!!hian
    2] Ma'am ur own problem is just a typical case of not being satisfied wit wat u have. U dont have any complaints about ur hubby yet u don't want to set ur ex nd his family free...u be witch?? I ga aju nchicha ju ngiga biko ogini di bu ifea?? Msheww
    U won't take ur smelly ass inside nd face ur marriage instead of chasing ur ex up nd down all in d name of becoming "family friends". Odiegwu
    Am just wondering why he's ur ex nd not ur husband since u guys are so chummy!!
    Ewu! Ewu Ewu hahahaha





    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She can never win if she go about it wrongly.. If she decides to play it out in a harsh way,she wouldn't win. She needs to stretegise and look for a way to manipulate his decision of her working.. There must be a way to get what she wants even without making too much noise..

      A colleague shared with me how she started working sometime,she had this type of husband,but she was well educated but he didn't see reasons with her. After she had her baby,not the first tho,she decided to strategies and figured she wouldn't win if she keeps doing it the gra gra way ,and she found a way around her husband.. Today she is working and has more kids,the man is happy with her working because she made it look like it was all his idea. I would have gone into details but I am sure she wouldn't like that.

      So madam,look for a way. It will work out for you.

      Delete
  29. Hmmn. The second story is something I can relate to. I also rmbr my ex everyday. He was such a lovely heart n d only man I ever loved apart from my hubby. My hubby is heavenly, he is perfect. He loves me exactly how I want to b loved. He worships me.
    But my ex just seem like the best friend I have lost. I really wish I could see him once In a while, he was the best thing that ever happened to me before hubby. We struggled alot to go apart and 4yrs into my relationship wt hubby, we still saw each other almost every week. Hubby permitted it cos he knew how much my ex meant to me.
    But wat he dint know was that I was on/off wt d friendship al dos times cos my ex always wanted me back and each time he brot on the topic, I will stay away for about a month telling hubby he was out of town. He wl come back begging and I will accept the friendship on same old condition
    Wat helped me tho was that we never had sex in our three years of relationship so the sexual feeling is never der. I cant even imagine sex wt any other than hubby.
    Its just dis feeling of a perfect friend who just cldnt fit into my dreams and expectations of a husband and rather thancarry on to find out if we cld be compatible, I opted out for fear of a future divorce.
    I miss him, just want to know he is fine n doing well.
    I cut him off wen hubby and I started wt wedding plans out of utmost respect for my would-be husband. No regrets , just wishes.
    I wish him all the best tho.
    Sorry for the rants.
    Dear poster, pls stay away in your best interest and out of respect for ur hubby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me I don't understand this your epistle, and your musings over spilt milk.
      Why una no marry den?
      You want hubby, you want ex too.. Mtchew!!!

      Delete
    2. If not for one thing I wld v said I wrote this story so chill Quiksilver cos u will never understand.

      Delete
  30. 1: So some women still mumu like this?
    Christian wife, continue.
    One day, you will wake up and wonder how life left you behind.

    2:Gradually cut off all communication channels with your ex.

    ReplyDelete
  31. @ poster no1..dia must b a reason ur husband is actin dat way..I dnt trust evrytin u said.Stella abeg no jst conclude jst lyk dat..@ poster 2..jst Tel us say u stil wnt ur ex Dick k..

    ReplyDelete
  32. N1. I don't think your story is complete, this scenario u describe is too deep..
    Has he caught or suspected u before? or r u into runs things before he met u? If no then u need to talk to him and threaten to live if he dosent giv u ur freedom.

    N2. Ur ex is ur ex, if he's that so wonderful u wud ve ended up with him.
    Coz the way u describe him here its like u still feel for him. cut all communications now coz if ur husband catches u, he might send u packing and that ex won't live his wife or he might even trick u to sleep with him .. Men r very tactical, be careful.

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  33. 1) See gobe! my dear u don match leg for Mallam shit! The man does not have your interest at heart.ooo, na dream killer be this!!!!....he has turned you into a baby maker and a piece of furniture at home #applyNumba6#

    2)why are you giving an EX that kind of liberty to dey relate with you. Why una separate in the first place? my dear shine ya eyes and stop dancing R&B to the Reggae that his is playing!#ouvrez tes yeux#

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  34. Narrator 2:
    Don't get it twisted,
    What ur EX had for u WAS FEELINGS...
    What he has for u NOW is LUST...
    Jst 3 rounds of SEX with ur EX will clear ur SEXY eyes...
    D unfortunate thing is dt d innocent devil will b blamed should d trouble escalate...

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  35. No 1 case, babe pls get a gd friend to take u for d test , try and be there early bc d queue in every DPS office is like Catholic, and try to do d driving test same day. Your husband is trying to cage you, so know dt now straighten up, fashion out a way to keep you going, get a job dt u can work from home, bc one wey no gree make u get dl, how do u think he will hv d mind to buy a car 4 you When you finally get the dl ?

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  36. Poster 1: I once had a bf that said that his wife will never be more prosperous than him. That's one of the reasons he was my ex. Abeg do what will give u peace. Poster 2: there's nothing like being family friends to ur ex. If the guy is amazing as u are making us believe, why didn't u guys marry? Abeg put him in the past where he belongs. Unless u wan chop clean mouth.

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  37. Poster 2 pls go back to ur EX n divorce ur hubby..mumu woman. Man na man, if u do anyhow, he will screw u n clean mouth, he won't leave his wife for u. Dey there dey confide in EX. Xfactor dey worry u.

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  38. 1, Insecurity is your husband's problem. Try and talk to him subtly, he might see reason with you. 2, an ex is in your past that's why he's called an ex. I can see you still have feelings for him with all this your he's a nice person. Leave this man alone, cut all form of communication with him before the devil starts playing chess with your emotions. Hian.

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  39. Narrator 2:
    Dnt get it twisted,
    What ur EX had for u was FEELINGS
    What he has for u now is LUST
    Jst 3 rounds of SEX with ur EX will clear ur SEXY eyes
    D unfortunate thing is d innocent devil will b blamed shld d trouble escalates...

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  40. Abeg, I don't have any advice for anyone, narratives like these annoy me

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  41. Marriage is suppose to bring out the best in you,wen ever I look at joke silver Jacobs and omotola jalade ekeinde and tell myself that is it,if their husbands didn't encourage them,help them and even push them I think they wouldn't have gotten this far,madam am sure you saw the RED FLAG but ingnored it, don't sit him down to talk... tell him you are backing out of the marriage because he doesn't want you to amount to nothing,my sis love is not blind,if you taught love is blind reality just woke u up! @poster 2,dnt just be family friend with him,start having sex with him,infact get pregnant for him then chase the his wife out of her matrimonial home, u hear? Otondo! Yanga dey sleep trouble dey wake am. You better face your marriage and mind your business.

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  42. N2 - why will your ex be telling you all about his life? Wetin come be your business? Why didn't you marry him? Does he discuss his life this way with his WIFE? How would you feel if your husband was doing this with another woman? We women are our own enemies. Walahi. Ecstasy indeed. You are emotional cheating on your hubby. Don't come back here with another chronicle when the tables are turned

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  43. Poster2,pls face your family and leave your ex alone biko,b4 u go use your hand pour sand for your marriage

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  44. Narrrative1: can't wrap my mind around why your hubby doesn't want u getting driver's license,u can't function in U.S without driving yourself,better find a friend and go take your state test,stop waiting for him...
    Narrative2: you sound like u have a plan B,leave your ex alone and face your marriage

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  45. POSTER 1:please and please leaving your husband is not the solution only if you don't love him enough to make him understand. Some men are that way,inshort most men.i have a friend in the US too whose husband is that way and its cos that man knows how most niger women ova dere lives deir man anyhow,how they do anyhow.in anyways,please just pray for your marriage.maybe you should try and do things(especially the ones that will make you hapi)before telling him and thats afta you must ve rily thot about it.
    I don't tink he wouldn't want you to progress. e just get how ds men dey take reason and I tell u sometimes it can be really funny. Stay strong ma sista,God will see you tru.
    POSTER 2 Biko face ur marriage,let ur past be ur past.which kain yeye friend be dt

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  46. Narrative 1- your husband is a buzuru monkey. Why won't he allow you achieve ur dream? Insecurity is what will kill some men and na I'm type de do bad bad things outside. Such men disgust me. Pleae madam sit him down and ask him why he's doing all that, if he can't give u a reasonable answer allow him go to work and start driving between his work periods.

    Narrative 2- you say watin? You want ex friendship abeggy forget old things for old things have passed away. Don't be like adog who goes back to lick her vomit. If he really loved you why didn't he marry you. Silly ass men. You should be angry he didn't marry you instead your romancing and conversing with such a man. Am sure he has seen that his wife is not better than you, he is now coming back for friendship. If you don't want to loose your beautiful home and marriage you better forget the looser. He should suck it up and deal with it,you are now another responsible mand property. Exs are silly. They like to destroy beautiful things. Shegu banza iskanchi, kwazooo mtcheeewwwwww. Give ur self brain dear ex convict. A word is enough for the wise

    Sexy F

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  47. N1, Nne you are in a country that promotes independence for women,so you cant say you are trapped. Do not let a man hold you down for anything. Have you considered GOD FORBID in future something happens to him is it then you start looking for something to do. wake up from your slumber and liberate yourself. Crying wont solve anything God has given you the power to liberate yourself.

    N2: Well I think the answer is stirring at you in the face, they can only be one captain in a ship so I suggest you listen to your husband before things get out of hand.


    IN

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  48. Prevention is better than cure. To poster number 2,leave your ex alone. Don't heed to his sweet tongue cos he might be up to something in the later end. keep him at arm's length and be mindful of what you discuss with him.

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  49. pls poster 2 let your 'EX' be EX. i really don't understand why people always goes back to their ex, its like eating your vomit knowing that you will throw up again

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  50. no now Bimpe. running away from a problem makes one a coward. solve it!

    now, what should she do?

    Keep talking to him soothingly to make him see the reason why you need to do your own thing. God forbid anything happens to him tmrw, what then happens to you? your kids? who will be the provider?

    now while at it, be tactful cos its not gonna be easy. (stubborn battle it is! -a battle of my way or your way) but hold your ground... if he is still not bending, my dear with or without his permission, do what you have to do. from your proceeds, make some little contributions to the home. (little I say ohh! his responsibiltiies remains his)

    spoil your kids with good stuff that will help their development. stuffs for the kids that he will take note of (e.g you buy them learning aids pc and all of that). fix some small small stuff around the house that ordinarily you need not ask him for the money to do them.(but of course things he will notice have been take care of)

    once he sees that you are helping out with some little things, he will mellow.

    na initial gra gra de worry your hubby. don't let him win.

    all the best

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  51. for the driving part, she should get on with it already. when he is at work, achieve what you can.

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  52. N1
    You have been dancing to his tune all these while now you to change, why? Women should stop forming mumu submissive for men. Make it clear to him from the start what you want.
    Please next time don't inform him before going for your license. Just do it. You have a right to freedom, you can't continue to be caged just because you are married. That's not how it should be.
    After your baby, get a job asap. Don't tell him until you have gotten an offer and make it clear to him you won't give up the job.
    I hate dream killers!

    N2
    Flee from that your ex unless you want to destroy your marriage.
    Any responsible married man/woman should not remain friends with anyone he/she has had sex with or anyone who makes you think of sex.
    It only ends in disaster!
    Be wise.

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  53. Poster 1, stop whining. You are a grown woman so drag yourself out of the house and get a friend to take you to Motor Vehicle to get your license. 2ndly, get a job. When you get dressed and about to go to work, your husband will ask you where you're going...you can then tell him that you are going to work. If he want's to make a big deal out of it, tell him that you didn't tell him about the job because he wasn't reasoning with you and that you need to work. You are in America for Pete's sake.

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  54. ***HEALING-RAIN***


    Me l go like hear from your husband why hin no want make you work for the land of the free where una reside so refer his ass to dis blog. There must be something,either you don't accord him enough respect,thw way you mingle with peeps outside especially the opposite sex or he is just plain insecure.
    As per your driving lesson,you have no excuse becos while he is @ work,you can go for it. Watch julia robert in "sleeping with the enemy" how she pretended to hate water but learnt swimming secretly.
    Some Folks are quick to say leave him,l will not say that and l know you do not want to otherwise you would have done it first before coming here to narrate. Tell your hubby that the moment you birth your baby,you have made up your mind to get off the couch and work and you will. Let himside decide what to do when you don't listen to his flimsy excuses anymore. Man must wack o o geh and you dey obodo america come dey form mugu. Smarten up mbok.


    Poster2
    Face your husband,face your marriage,face your God.
    You wan form crusade untop anoda woman husband and marriage?
    Shege barawo.
    Mind your goddamn marriage and guard your totto against external prick you slutty devil.

    ReplyDelete
  55. An ex is an ex.
    But if u feel him so much,do these:







    When you are being drilled,think of him,remember his moves and climax hard.

    Or
    At the throes of passion,slap ur hubby,call out your ex's name and start crying.

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  56. SDK please hide your ugly face. No offence. Thanks.31 October 2014 at 16:05

    Please enable cusses bitch!!!

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  57. Hahahahahahahhahah! Stella uve killed me already wit dat Okefor's law.kai, those days in Providence High School wit @ Sylvia Ike.

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  58. Numb 1: ur husband doesn't trust u so find out y he is actn up den frm his ansa u kw wat to do...dnt jst leav wen ur nt sure of d problem
    Numb2: let ur past b ur past bfr u mess up ur present wif ur past.... *omo I de rhythm sha*

    ~@iamjbankz SA to President Jonathan 2015~

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  59. SDK -don't be quick to judge marital cases on this blog o!

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  60. P1 ur husband has grudge for you a very big one so u need to sit him down and talk to him
    P2 Pls face your work
    Na play play them they take get players

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  61. Poster 1, I thought it was me narrating when I saw your story. I am also in the US and going through the same thing. My dear, you have to put your foot down (with wisdom) or it might come back to bite you.

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  62. Hian! Oriegwu! Wizard husband and confused wife!

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  63. gbam! cynham cakes.
    our views on this matter is one and same.
    e-hug sister!

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  64. I did nothing suspicious in the past. I got married as a virgin and I have been very loyal to him. I just can't understand why he doesn't want me to grow. Maybe I've been too loving and submissive and he has taken advantage of that. Thanks for the comments, everyone. Poster 1

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  65. Lol at wizard husband. When I first mrt mu hudband, he said after we get married i can work, take the baby to a sitter, be independeny bla bla bla. After marriage, u ean try the 180? Oh it doesnt make sense. Why not stay home with the baby, i can drive u to any appointment. But he will be carrying face. When we argue, he points out how dependent we are on him, we should count ourselves lucky that hes here. But when i want to get a job, drivers license, go back to school, he bluntly refuses. Does that make sense? That is called emotional manipulation n abuse. He wants u totally dependent on him so u have nowhere to turn when push comes to shove. my dear, tie your wrapper well. You have a brain, use it. You had a life before him. You can have one after him. He needs to decide if he wants to be a part of the life you've chosen. Empower yourself and stop doing like one slow ice block that refused to melt. Fin.

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  66. #1,Since, you know how to drive, and passed the knowledge test, having your learner 's driving permit, I believe, then, Schedule your driving test online, hire a driving instructor's car for the number of hours you would need him, he would drive you to the DMV office, and you would do the test and get your license.Fix the date and time he would not be at home and when the kids are at school. Best of luck.

    #2, Block all contact from your ex. He is simply monitoring your activities and measuring it to his own progress and happiness.

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  67. I pity for most women on this blog that will soon be alone after taking advise from Single and frustrated Ladies from this forum, to quit their marriages.

    For your information, men do not respect divorcees. Most Men will deceive you to leave your husbands but will at the end treat you worse than your ex.

    Am a man, please keep your home.I have friends in Ikeja and V.I that Ladies virtually beg to sleep with them. Even in the UK, Ladies virtually beg men for sex where we have Jamaican and other ladies.

    Bimpe krep respecting your husband but at the sametime look for something to do incase of future challenges.


    A Lady that is assured of constant sex from the husband as part of his marital duty will be

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What is this goat saying? Most divorcees aren't respected? Did u mean most WOMEN aren't respected? When a boss isn't treating you right, you quit. When your landlord isn't treating u well, u move out. If your pastor isn't saying what you want, u find a new church. But once you enter husband issue, u must die there? There will never be a time a woman would be happy n treated fairly and people would advice her to leave. A marriage is supposed to be enjoyed and not endured. If you're not happy, why stay and suffer and eventually resent your husband? Grow a set and do what you need to do.

      Frustrated women? Because they're single? But single men are free and living life and all that. Double standard much? We need real men not small boys that reason like newborn babies.

      Delete
  68. y dear, stay off ur ex. It might bring u trouble. I support u sweet sally. As for the BV whose hubby doesn't want her progress? Reason well and pray, then do what makes u happy.

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  69. I live in canada nd my husband supports me. I have finished school nd nw working, I pay part of the bills nd everybody is happy, your husband is just insecure.

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  70. Poster No 1, You don't treathing your husband with a divorce, just try and ask him a candid questions if you haven't done so,I believe he must a legitimate reasons for telling you not to drive, cause a man in his right mind would think of his wife relieving from the stress of driving all the time. If he didn't give you a good reason, if I were you, I would do the test behind his back.

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  71. story 2,pls PRAY and ask God to break that soul tie with your ex,its a bad spirit and for u to even hold on to memories recalling how it was so great,i would recommend you fast and pray and be focused in your marriage. the bible says that when have canal knowledge outside marriage you are automatically bound to that person,in clear terms if you have sex outside marriage b4 marriage and that person is under a curse,that curse automatically follows you,because by having sex you have become one.please also guard and guide yourself in all thy dealings!please.

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  72. Stella tell me whether the best medicine for headache na to cut off the head? I agree that the husband of #1 sounds like enemy of progress but this marriage thing suppose be partnership nau. Negotiate with that man! Use threat set.
    #2 no be mumu o,na the thing wey she wan chop no let her eye clear. Estacy na tablet o!and e dey kill sometimes.

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  73. Stella tell me whether the best medicine for headache na to cut off the head? I agree that the husband of #1 sounds like enemy of progress but this marriage thing suppose be partnership nau. Negotiate with that man! Use threat set.
    #2 no be mumu o,na the thing wey she wan chop no let her eye clear. Estacy na tablet o!and e dey kill sometimes.

    ReplyDelete

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