Some couples are going through a financial storm in their marriages...challenges caused by the woman being the bread winner and supposedly accused of not being submissive enough.
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I read a punch report where women complained of not wanting to lose their husbands despite bringing the food to the table and their men lazing
around,spending all wifey's hard earned monies and keeping side chicks...their pain was evident in the tales of woe they told...I was even shocked when i read some hubbys connive with their mechanics to milk the wifey,haba!
It used to be women sitting at home and taking all the ish or whatever their men threw their way all in the name of being the bread winner.....These days,women work and some even earn more than their spouses but their high earnings have put some in uncomfortable situations with their men because if they try to say their piece of mind,he assumes she talks because she earns more.
Why would a woman bringing more to the table cause any problem at all?This is not a feminist report.I have had some of my friends complain to me and i was just wondering...Shouldn't a man be glad that he doesn't have a lazy woman as wife?someone that can stand for both of them when things go wrong with his job or business?
Why do men borrow monies from their spouses and refuse to pay back? don't men know that borrowing in the name of love and not paying back is an emotional crime? This also applies to women but I think men are more prone to do this from various narratives I have come across.
To make matters worse,some men are out of a job,broke,live on wife's salary and use it to keep their side chicks going...WTF!
Some men wont even commit because their girlfriends earn more,they are plotting to get her to quit before they ask her to marry them...hmm,one chance!
Let's discuss this issue...Men,why does a woman earning more give you a complex problem?
If the men do not answer,then the women are welcome to tell their story.
I will just sit back and read comments...
ReplyDeleteIt's just complex problem. I can't deal wit a broke ass nigga dat cheats mehn. For wot now. So afta providin for d fam in all ramification, u'll now pay me back by cheatin? Mbanu it's not done. Women are sufferin sha. I just can't deal
DeleteGo to Lekki and the major parts of the island, dem full there. Lazy ass men forming posh like they are all together. Most of them ehn, their wives cover their nakedness. I guarantee that if a census is carrier out to find men who feed on their wives, 85% of men would make the statistic.
DeleteI don't know why some men have no shame. Fine, a woman should support her hubby when he's down, but some men take undue advantage of it. It has become an epidemic and it's sad. Even the wives who feed their hubbies are bullied to silence when they want to reprimand their husbands as they would normally do before they started to feed them o, but the men will kick in sentiments and say "is it because you are the one paying for the family?" so such wives feel bad and keep quiet so that no one will say they are bullying their financially wrecked husbands.
In the end she will turn to a Mumu in her own house bearing the financial burden her own money again. Nonsense.
Sisi Eko,U and I both know that it's fake and broken ass people that live in Lekki.
DeleteThis is one topic that cannot be eradicated. Interestingly it's in vogue..some men see nothing wrong with it. Whom do we blame? The woman who indulges her lazy husband of course. With the exception of the men who are genuinely financially stranded due to no fault of theirs. The matter don tire me.
DeleteAhah Ezenwanyi u can say that again oo...infact am tempted to mention names. hian.
DeleteA lot of unanswered question. Personally I thing everything about the world that was originally and naturally put in place by God has all been turned around by the ruler of this world just to cause problems for humans. When anything deviate from God's original plan, then problems are inevitable. From marriage problems, lesbianism, gay, divorce, disrespect, etc. Evry original plan of God for humans has all been turned around, its a battle between humans and powers of darkness, just like the bible has stated that we do not fight against flesh and blood but against principalities and powers of darkness. So that's just the major problem, and everybody is attached to a family, so the devil is really attacking families this days with the aim that if families are distabilised, the world will be distabilsed. We are coming to the end of the world and everybody must be prayerful.
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
Alloy reading ur comment makes me so srry for u,plz dis answer u gave,hw does it relate to d story here? Must u comment on every story nd say crap?u jump frm linda's blog to stella's nd to God knws whose blog next !chai I pity for u,u're so jobless?
DeleteAlloy reading ur comment makes me so srry for u,plz dis answer u gave,hw does it relate to d story here? Must u comment on every story nd say crap?u jump frm linda's blog to stella's nd to God knws whose blog next !chai I pity for u,u're so jobless?
DeleteAlloy has said it all!things have turned from God's original plan,and as such can never be d same again!a woman was made to be taken care of by the man and not otherwise,now it's the woman dat is taking care of the man,and he naturally will feel threatened cos God did not make him to be under a woman,and dats where the problem starts from:little gripping here and there,he will graduate to 'she doesn't respect me'(even if she has not done anything wrong or disrespectful)but it's all cos he's beginning to feel inferior!dats even d reason dey keep d side chicks,remember dey are d ones spending on dese gals?why cos a man is wired naturally to be a provider,a protector and d hero and he feels important around d side chick acting his normal God ordained role'.
DeleteI think women should stop totally carrying d family's responsibility on their heads,they should stop forming independent woman and demand from these men to take up responsibilities no matter how small his earning is,he should just bring and let's stop pushing them to live beyond their limits and pockets all bcos we can augment.the joke is on us rite now,these men need to stop being babysitted!
Alloy, the same bible says that any man who cannot fend for his family is worse than an INFIDEL...... Go figure.
DeleteAlloy I agree with you this time. I need not add more.
Deletei
I dey laugh ooooo. Meanwhile some men don't appreciate their women at all. I know of a female professor whose husband only sits at home all day reading news papers. Then in the evening he collects money from her and uses her car to go and drink. And his youngers ones have no respect for her at all. Yet she can't talk, if I'm the one I ll have kicked the idiot out long ago.
Delete@Queen bee; God bless u, u just hit d nail on d head, very true, men were not created to be taken care of, rather it's d other way round... I knw a friend who pays d rent n buys foodstuffs in d house, now she regrets it n wish she never started...no matter how little, we need to let d men provide these things
DeleteMr hot chocolate! Thanks for the insult, its not a new thing that I am jobless, you really don't need to tell me for me to know I am, but be rest assured that I can feed you and your family for the next 20yrs, that's a fact!
DeleteIts so unfortunate that you have a shallow mind, now let me educate you, God's original plan for husband and wife, was that the husband should be the head of the family and the bread winner and to take responsibilities of his family, and the wife will be an helper, it becomes highly irresponsible for a man to become incapable of bearing the burden of responsibilities of his family and shift it to the wife, now when the original plan by God for husband and wife become altered, then their is bound to be a problem, bearing that in mind, the devil with his cunning ways has made so many men lazy and incapable of the responsibilities of their families, or haven't you heard of the saying that "an idle mind is devils workshop"?
What do we see in today's world God's original plan for families and couples is being deviated from, and who is the architect? "Devil". Unfortunately shallow minded people like you who lacks insight can't see the root of the problem, and if you don't know the cause of a problem, you can't solve it, that's why people like you might never have a hitch free marriage.
Your comment will be visible after approval
@Queen Bee... lovely comment... buh dese men are getn 2 lazy... m in a committed relationship 4 bout 5yrs... buh guess wat? he has based our marriage on my getn a job... m beginning 2 wonder... wat are his plans? I understand I need a job. I actually hate 2 be dependent except on my parents... buh I dnt think rubbing d job 1st thingy on my face is wise... I fink he shud hv lied bout his reason tho... now I wonder is God simply showing me sumn? Cos he's already showing me that he'll really need my salary oh A.B
Delete@hot chocolate u need to pray for wisdom and understanding. Cos u clearly lack it. U also need a brain,smh. @ Alloy, nice write up, so much sense in it. The world is coming to an end.
Deleteyou can feed who for 20 years??, chai chai take am easy
DeleteWell written Alloy C, I agree with you. Things are now upside down because we have altered the natural order of things, the way God intended. It's one thing to support your hubby if he runs into some financial issues, but all bets are off when the wife becomes a permanent breadwinner while the hubby turns into a couch potato. Personally, I believe it's part of a man's duties to provide for his family.
DeleteCollin Emeka,I'm sure Alloy was just joking,or were u serious @Allloy?but seriously @hot,how in fucks name is that ur business if Alloy decides to turn himself into a blogwhore??It's not an insult @Alloy,cos if u noticed I added whore and it's a respectable title.
Delete@alloy, you don't have to keep explaining and repeating yourself for Hot chocolate, she is obviously lacking understanding. Whoever brain is giving sense is expected. ......
DeleteHahahahahahaha una no go kill me ooo
Deleteno personal story bt i think its an ego problem for men wen ppl hears their wife earns more than them. the painful part wld be d broke ass jobless husband using hs wife salary to take care of a side chick.
ReplyDeletethe men in d house shld answer us biko.anxiously waiting for comments to roll in.
stells weneva i write something concerning you, my comments gets swallowed by your pot.y???? diaris God o
Seriously this is is everywhere. LazyassMen. My fiance can borrow n then pretend to forget. Very Annoying something. SoonToBeMrs
DeleteYou better sort that out before you marry him@soon to be Mrs
DeleteAnd u still wan be his mrs. Issokay 😃.prepare for emotional robbery abi na so stella talk am. Lol
DeleteY should a wife earn more than d hubby????It's a recipe for disaster and d only solution is for d woman to resign and start petty trading and only then,will there be peace.
Delete@anon 1:56,ur fiancé is ur soul mate,go ahead and do right by him,he will surely change after marriage inugo.
Ezenwanyi!! really, am sure this story is all about you. The wife should resign hmn.
Deletelets just say it partially depends on the kind of man u marry,not in all cases though
ReplyDeleteIt's applicable to all .
DeleteForget all those madness talk of I like working,I cant stay idle all na wash.
They all crave it but don't ve it.
Nice. Watching frm distance.
ReplyDeleteUrhobo men are good at this
DeleteOya men, its your Monday cup of coffee.
ReplyDeleteOya o men, its your Monday cup of coffee.
ReplyDeleteIf only women will contribute a little and not carry the entire financial issues oh their head, there will be less of such cases.
ReplyDeleteMen have so much ego and money is what brings respect to a man.
When a woman is beginning to take that place in a man's life, there is no way he wouldnt feel so complexed.
Hence he accepts his wife being the alhaji bingi bringi while he uses her cash to maintain a small girl that would respect him for providing...of course she doesn't know where the money is coming from.
A poor man with ego is like giving peter ak 47 and at d same time pointing out Ezenwanyi ibilibi ogada to him.
DeleteOya bitchplis cum n tell us why ur ashewo ishan babe dey feed u wit her ashy moni
ReplyDeleteIts a matter of choice. A gun wasn't place on the lady's head neither was she forced to assist her broke husband.
ReplyDeleteNaija men prefer to marry women who earn more than them joor. Its not easy having an uncashed out ATM at home.
Some of the mistakes made are from women that are so desperate to get married and end up settling for less. Must they become Mrs Somebody before they have a say in the society? Ask the likes of Genevieve and Rita Dominic who are doing exceptionally well.
The fault isn't in men alone. Men also spend on their wives and they end up with toy boys. Senator DD has all the money even her husband is as wealthy as they come in naija politics, but she still prefers young 6packs abuja dudes.
Make I stop here before I reveal more beans
Aijay tell them o, help me ask some women o...keep your money in d bank if ur hubby isn't worth ur kobo, shikena!
DeleteI like ur thinking @Aijay.
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A man who doesn't provide for his family, is likened to a rebel.
ReplyDeleteSo guys please provide for your fams no matter how small, irrespective of what your wife is earning.
Lets all endeavour to stick to Gods design of marriage, that way there shall be no/minimal problems.
Humans have decided they are smarter than the Lord, yet time and time again we have seen how our wisdom is only but foolishness before him.
Men showering their love on side chicks
Women thinking submission is achaic.
People should study he meaning of husband/wife and the responsibilities/reequirements attached to it
from Gods word, not all these feminist/chauvinist books
Rebel???isn't that a little harsh?????
DeleteThis one is just being a burden on himself and his family and untill he starts throwing bombs like d bh and mend ,only then can we give d title to him but now he's just a guy down on luck
This is my story. I cant even begin to mention how much I spent on him. Thank God i am free from him. He stole from me, Increase whatever he bought in order to extort money from me. Of course his family members tried to get me to resign from my job. I refused oh, fast foward to few years later, they called me all sorts of names ranging from prostitute to you name it.
ReplyDeleteI dont care and i am the happiest lady alive since we separated. The painful part is whenever he steals from me he will deny it.... so he thinks in his myopic mind that i will believe i stole my own money...SMH
Lol@you stole your own money
DeleteLoooool @stealing your own money
DeleteU will still get another man like unless u deal with that in U that kerps attracting LOOSERS.
DeleteAttracting loosers, ain't you one yourself. I must contribute,
Deleteihe neme
ReplyDeletePunch report or u read it on ladun Liadi's blog?
ReplyDeletepunch online ...saw it too please SEARCH..Ladun must have CULLED it
DeleteFool it was in punch newspaper on sat. I'm sure you only read blogs
Delete1 Timothy 5:8 -But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
ReplyDeleteFor those of you that lazy around, deny your child or failed to provide for your own children...The Bile says YOU WORSE THAN AN INFIDEL....LOBATAN
Gbam
DeleteBeing an infidel is not d worst that could happen,a lot of shit goes down daily that even infidel(ity)is an inconvenience.
DeleteAn infidel meaning unbeliever @ezenwayi
DeleteI know what an infidel is,or ve u forgotten I'm a bible scholar.
DeleteI just coined it.u know creativity**
It's all depends on d kind of men,,my friend is a breadwinner in her house & d hubby adores her,,u hardly know dat she is d breadwinner bcos both of dem r humble,,down to earth..
ReplyDeleteBe glad you are not the one. Your friend won't tell you how it pinches her or the sacrifices she has to make.
DeleteCassy,Ur friend's head is in d clouds and tell her that Ezenwanyi says she's a bloody learner.
DeleteThe man is humble baa?Wait until the man becomes the breadwinner and she looses her source of income u will smell the other side of him...
DeleteGrowing up, I have NEVER heard or seen my parents quarrel, though my mum says they used to quarrel a lot. For three years, dad was outta his job and mummy was the sole breadwinner. We never knew. One day, my sister n i came back from school, she went to mum n asked for 50 naira for a fun show in school, mum scolded her and told her she had no money. My sis replied saying "my daddy will give me", when dad got home, mum gave him the money and told him what transpired between her n my sister. My sis went into their room minutes later and asked daddy for the money and my dad gave her the money his wife gave him. She looked at mummy, gave her the "I told you so look" and left. It was recently mummy told us all these stories, last year to be precise. Daddy told me about his three years of joblessness before he died, saying that my mum was the perfect person for him.
ReplyDeleteNow, I don't know the kind of quarrels they had, I'm just trying to say that it depends on the couple, the man and the woman. Do they understand and communicate?
There's nothing wrong in helping ones hubby when he's financially down. But where d man bcomes arrogant, abusive or starts cheating, it becomes an issue
DeleteU are asking d kind og quarrel they had???are u a learner???well,if u ask me,I would say one of them was cheating on d other.
DeleteYea.....I said it.
Mrs D,pls dont abuse me ooo...U know my "condition" oooo.....
Lol....well, I'll take that with a pinch of salt dear@Ezenwanyi...
DeleteSome men r very very lazy,dey r undera curse,I no a particular guy dt always gos 2 big places and event jst 2 meet rich gals,ad al he wnts 2 knw is if u av a job ad also use style 2 ask u aw much u earn,wt is fake american accent and bleachd face.he's 29 no job,al he ds is waka about,looking 4 rich gals.ladies shud b very careful,ur mony is ur mony is mony is our money,dts all.
ReplyDeleteAre U d one that placed d curse on them?????
DeleteThat guy is hustler @and u"ve got to respect his hustle.
Bleached face,face American accent....U think it's easy to do all that????
He go soon hammer,just wait and see.
But women do that everyday.
DeleteStells, ordinarily men are egoistic, they crave for respect so much as if it is the air they breathe, they like to assert themselves, be in charge, be worshipped etc.Some will even keep reminding their woman " I am the head, I am the husband" as though it is in dispute.
ReplyDeleteNow it gets worse when the woman is the one paying the bills, men get unecessarily touchy, every innocent statement they read meanings to, you try to put across your point and he sees you as not submissive,you disagree with his thoughts and you are stubborn and always arguing. Oh she said this to me because she pays the rent, they feel less of a man cuz they cannot provide, they are quick to anger and start getting frustrated.They just can't handle it.
Sometimes, some of these women act up when the burden gets to much on them. At the end of the day, they are humans. If the man is lazy and laid back, it takes the grace of God to respect such a man.Some women get more agitated if they discover the man is cheating and start cheating as well.
Dearest men, never rely on your woman's money, strive to fend for your family, it is ok for her to support and if she earns more than you, do the bit you can and encourage her. Women, try and respect your husbands if you pay the bills, after all you are one but useless irresponsible men are exempted.
This is my thought process on this issue.
Have a blessed week everyone .
How can U exempt irresponsible and useless when it's clearly no fault of theirs?????
DeleteShebi U are a christian??or ve u forgotten that Christianity includes and exclude?????
Behind every successful man,there is a woman.
Out of point?????
Oriegwu!!
Men** not exlude.
Deleteexclude**
DeleteI really blame the women here because even the bible says a man who can't provide for his woman is worse than infidel. I am in support of women working and supporting their man but a Man's job should be his job. You are not a super woman. I tell people everyday that I will rather remain single than lower my standards or marry a broke ass loser. What's the point being married then? Why do women care about what people would say at the expense of their happiness. Usually they start these super woman stunt while dating, making the man comfortable with using your money. So it's very difficult in marriage. I can't sweat for any low life broke ass. I am making my money for me. When I hear these stories, I am just amazed at the length women go just to remain a Mrs? It's so sad!!!
ReplyDeleteRight on point! I cannot even marry a guy that I'm richer than. Shoe get size abeg.
DeleteAwwww.......U will lower ur standards cos ur life's ambition to be a mrs and there are minus zero men out there and pls stop that tale of not minding if u die without marrying cos u and I know it's all fables.
DeleteIn most cases if the woman is humble about her income the husband won't have problems, some women rub it in. As for MOI i don't have a problem helping my man if need be, i will only have a problem if he is the type that cheats and spends my money on his whores, that is an emotional abuse and i will take it very serious just like physical abuse. But i also know a lot of women who are married to big men and this women spend their husbands money on small boys.
ReplyDeleteY should she be humble about her income,she earned it.
DeleteThere is no way,a woman will help/give money to a man that he wont spend it on another woman,y?cos he's a man and d only way he would feel spending that loot is to share it with ur kind.
...as for married women spending money on small boys,that's a story for another but d woman should be stoned to death if caught.
This story thus bring memories... Since I was a teen, ive always prayed to God to give the ability to be humble, whether or not I'm rich but God should make my husband richer, more humble and superior over me, that way, everything would be fine. I love to depend on him for certain things. A man loves when his woman is all submissive not entirely relying on him but the woman having her income too which is why it's never advisable for a woman to eat with both hands, always save for rainy days. That's where the "hubby being broke" story comes in, you can always assist your man, never boss him by playing his roles instead encourage him in every possible way u can.
ReplyDeleteHumility is d weak and downtrodden.
DeleteHumility=Humiliation.
Encourage him in what way????he is a man for goodness sake and needs to be left alone to tackle issues.
Look at men like Dangote,Adenuga,Cosmas......they tackled things on their own without a stupid woman breathing their neck asking silly questions like how,when and why...leave them to figure it out.
Ezenwayi you talk true o. Iv tried the whole supporting financially with every other guy iv dated and where are they now? Chai iv been a fool. Now that iv caught this one I want to marry, lets just say both I and my family get what we want even before we want it. Lol. Leave a man to do a man's job, he will figure it out eventually or feel free to give him pointers but essentially just allow him break his back for you, cos if he doesn't do it for you, he will do it for someone else.
DeleteI am d truth.
DeleteIt depends on d couple, if he's not a lazy ass hubby he will appreciate the fact that if anything happens to him he can be sure his wife will be able to take care of their kids... Another thing is being humble, some women take advantage of the fact that they earn more and therefore start misbehaving so like I said it depends on d couple
ReplyDeleteHow do U expect a breadwinner to be humble???
Deletepls cut these super human women some slack .
it's not easy biko.
Story of the 21st Century woman...
ReplyDeleteShe must be beautiful
The proverbs 31 Woman
Stay fit and Sexy all her days
Must be able to "fire" hanging upside down from buglary proofs whenever the hubby needs "IT"
The kids must be neat
Her home must be well kept..24-7, 365 days
She must be a walking intercontinental restaurant
Must Shield the kids from bullies
Attend PTAs
The laughable thing is she has been groomed for this "enviable position" since she was 6....
Her male siblings?????.....They aspire to NOTHING..
All they do while their sisters "train" is fiddle with "PS2 Games"
Car Race .....Check out the "latest bakassi's and manchesters" ...in the neighborhood...
Fast forward 50 years down the line..the female folk ACHIEVE in Leaps and Bounds..some are even labelled as "ashawos" for daring to lead in a man's world...
Their male siblings???? Oh ...they just aquired the Latest PS4..Drink brukutu, wak nkwobi and isi ewu under the udara tree and wait with breathless anticipation for tonights round of 12am "nacking" after the kids are put to bed!
WOMEN RAISE YOUR MALE KIDS RIGHT
Spot on Obum.
DeleteYou have said it all.
God bless you.
Where do I send ur kiss to
DeleteThank you jare. U r so spot on
DeleteOriegwu!!!
DeleteMothers did raise their kids right.
It's d controlling,power drunken women who wouldn't let d men take d wheels we should be appealing to.
Comparing ur husband to Ezenwanyi"s hubby,,living above ur
means cos u want to belong...here's a newsflash,Ur husband"s are tired of d whole shenanigans and ve simply resigned to fate and thrown in d towels as well.yet,y are u guys not still satisfied????
U want to control ur home,husbands and not pay d price???????
God bless you, I luv you so much for this comment, women are a woman's problem... XxxbarbieXxx
Delete2 yrs of marriage. Hubby doesn't bring much home. He makes money only when I bring contacts his way. Never says thank you. Hits me whenever we quarrel. I pay all the bills including house rent. I have refused to renew the rent this year. I just siddon dey look am. He is expecting some money from sale of their family house, but he's told me he would give half of it to his uncle he has promised to help in life. I asked him who he expects to pay the rent? He never answer me o! I have a game plan though, once the landlady's patience runs out and serves a quit notice, that will be my exit plan. I am dumping him for good. His siblings say I am wicked because I stopped spending my money on them. I have gone for different kinds of counselling with my husband, and he has always been found guilty! My sister paid for him to go on a business trip to China earlier this year, but he is yet to say thank you to me o! I just found out through his phone that he has a young girl who gives him money and another one that he gives money.I don't love him anymore. He keeps asking me to pay off his debts. I maintain and fuel the car for him. Infact, I save soo much money whenever we are not talking to each other. Everybody says I should leave him before I develope high BP. O jare, I no fit shout o!
ReplyDeleteNa wah ohh..
DeleteThank God you have decided to leave the ingrate...
What rubbish??..
Some women dey try sha..I can't even fall in love with a stingy broke ass..
@ANON,U are going nowhere and U and I both know that.
DeleteU are a sucker for pain.
No worry,e go better.
Awww,Mrs D,ur mum must be a very good woman,u shd take her advice all the time...
ReplyDeleteShe really is....a lot of our mothers sacrificed for their marriage because their men were understanding and still loving. These days, I just dunno what to say.
DeleteI read that story too and it's a big pity and shame, I know it's a societal problem and has to do with African orientation, ppl think living single /divorce is a curse while in advanced societies ppl divorce 10 times and no one stigmatise them, rubbish abeg, these broke guys take ur money, abuse them and still cheat, yet the women are unhappy in d marriage. Look woman if u r there, the guy is just waiting for you to hammer big time, then he will kill u, inherit it and leave ur kids to suffer, so do d right thing now and get out, live happily and u would find genuine love again with a real man and provider
ReplyDeleteSue,such women cant be happy on their own ooo......they need such men to balance d equation.
DeleteDont U know some women love to compain about d things not right in their lives and yet,do not want to change a thing.
My own hubby is not working oh, am d bread winner n I most say its nt easy, my hubby three sisters r staying with us its so annoying n they can eat for Africa, I hav told my hubby to send them home and stil send d litle he has to them, I cannot save, can't even buy anytin for myself. But my hubby thinks I don't want to see his family around that's y am asking him to send them home. Am so tired n happiness is so far
ReplyDeleteI pity you. Keep spending your money for your husband and his family. The struggle to remain a Mrs.
DeleteAyaaa Vivien, I duff my hat 4 u o. U go feed ur hubby n feed his sisters? Are they not ashamed? Without bin told dem no know say de should relocate home niii? Dat ur hubby na wa 4 am o!! Feed him n his siblings join.....oriegwu.......
DeleteWow!!!
DeleteBravo Viven!!!!!
I think u are enjoying d whole ish,it makes u feel important cos u think u are doing God's work by feeding and clothing d destitute(s).
Wow!!!!!!
Loooool Ezenwanyi biko no make me laf, Vivien as u r running charity, have a rule and safe a fixed amount 1st, in a dedicated account u won't touch, then let dem manage d rest
DeleteMy dear..it's not easy..Iv almost sent this as a post to stella but I kip holding back cos my hubby reads this blog.im the only one working for 5 years in my home.not based in Nigeria so u can imagine how expensive ..with a son..it's not his fault he can't get a job but because of circumstances ..here I'm the one cheating ..not gettin money from any man..just because I need emotional attachment with someone..Iv struggled and cried and cried ..the burden is toooooo much..I dnt even get to see my son like that because I have to work so much to cover our bases..I love my husband too much..I only slept with this person once ,I don't even love the guy don't even know y..Iv spoken to family and people for counselling ..confided in my elder cousin as to sleeping with someone else and I didnt feel bad initially..but now I'm heartbroken..and then I try to go that way again..then I call on close family to speak sense to my brain before I go to meet this guy again..don't know y..is it because of stress..but there are some men who work alone in the family ..does the stress give them the burden to Cheat or is it because I'm a woman I feel it's too much ..I'm struggling emotionally.my husband doesn't take advantage of the fact at all.hea at home with the boy takin care of him..I'm just lost ..Iv gone on counselling sites on how to handle this ..hmm
ReplyDeleteYou know the thing about God's forgiveness? You have to actually forgive yourself before you feel Gods forgiveness because he has forgiven you. Stop confessing to people you didn't hurt, if the guilt is eating you up, talk to your husband.
DeleteA woman isn't wired to carry her man, so keep asking God's grace.
Eeeeya
Delete*warm hug darling*
U are a good person who made a mistake...now let it be d last...make no more
U are also hard on urself
Relax,slow Down....breathe...
May God be Ur Strength dear
Smh.
DeleteSo ur husband is to be blamed for ur indiscretion????
One child and u needed to be emotionally attached????
...and U are fucking for free ontop of that.U need deliverance asap.
For d record u aint a good person.
Lol. I blame us- WOMEN!!
ReplyDeleteStella, I really hope you post this.
Women are too emotionally weak. We go be like tiger for office, but one man will just make you soft like akamu. And the annoying part is that a man NEVER makes any irrational decision when it comes to money and emotions. He will think, plot, weigh and decide. But us women, We go just fall yakata. Like a pack of cards. Why can't we try and be rational like men, when spending for love? How many men give a woman money when she is not of any 'use' to him? My friend was trying to get her bf to change her car, he finally got a her a brand new corolla. This is a boy she has been managing with right from his nothing-nothing days. Knowing his account balance, she was vexing. When she gave him a piece of her mind he simply told her "I am happy you know I can get you a 2014 Range now now now. But u are not my wife, neither do we have a child between us. Why would I spend such money for someone to come and reap? When I know we are bound together by something then I can buy you whatever you want. Till then manage the economy tickets" She was so hurt because she realised that she had actually been breaking her neck for him, blindly, when he was actually 'seeing road'. Up to using her mother's house as collateral for him to collect loan, at some point. Thank God he paid it back, or else..... She came to me very angry and I told her he was right. Because I won't sacrifice a dime for anyone who hasn't done same for me. Make all of us dey Sidon look dey pray.
If a man is not bringing money home, why give him money?? For what?? business is bad abi? 6 months is enough time for a hard working guy to give u a definite plan as to how he has made effort to pick up.
I won't live above my husband's means. If my husband can afford a three bedroom flat but I can afford a mansion, I will park to the three bedroom oh! And be looking at him like a dunce. Yes the money is in my account, but I won't offset his bills. He can call me stingy, selfish and bla bla. But in the end, it will challenge him. Better to use that money to buy properties for the kids. He sees the money is for the family's good, but he is not touching it.
An older colleague once told me that while getting comfy on his banker wife's earnings, he was praying for a breakthrough and God told him that he shouldn't expect blessings when he let's his wife do everything. And he mentioned that from that day he stopped collecting money from his wife, his earnings have NEVER been the same. They are super-rich now. But women will be giving their husbands money and making them lazier, unable to exploit their destiny because you encourage it.
Nip it in the bud and it won't come crawling to you. If the dude is too lazy, then his sorry as shouldn't be married.
There is an issue right now, because one of my relatives husbands has been living off her and using her to milk her parents and sending the proceeds to his family. This one na fine boy to the core, meanwhile shishi no dey. Her parents came to visit her in Lagos and saw the condition under which she has been living (on top all the money dem dey send) the mother cried all the way to my house to confess to my mum. No masters, uncompleted house, no car, mattress on the floor, no gas. Staying in the outskirts of lagos and all. The boy don build house with his wife's family's money. Now the girl is in yaba left, 8 months pregnant with major depression issues. He has wrecked her and deceived her parents. Worst case is that he is claiming he is tired of the marriage.
God punish lazy men!
Gbamest u too make sense
DeleteGosh!..you sabi write epistle but you made sense sha..
DeleteLol@Queen of sdk. Na vex i bn dey vex oh. No mind my epistle. Annoying men full for road
DeleteThe worse thing aNY woman can do to herself is to marry a man she's richer than . He'll be jealous of any and everything you do . I can't talk without him saying is it becos ... If I buy clothes for our daughter he'll be angry and jealous . Sisters always marry ur level orca guy richer than you are .
ReplyDeleteKapish.
Delete@anony 2:51pm: you are very stupid and ur whole generation are fools! Oloshi! Anuofia always ask b4 talking,ok? Were
ReplyDeletehome training is a virtue
DeleteWhat really annoys me is why a man would not give her woman some respect or praise her just to boost her moral when he knows she contributes a lot to the family through her hard work rather than picking quarrel in every little thing. Most men are so guilty of this bad attitude. They don't provide enough for the family, the woman works, takes care of the house and the children and yet they are meant to look like the bad person if they ever disagrees with the man over something that he is doing wrong. Most men abroad become so reluctant to take care of their other responsibilities notwithstanding that school fees, hospital bills, house rent are free or being subsidised by the government and yet they claim to be the head of the house or should I say fish head (isi azu wey no get anything inside).
ReplyDeletePraise d woman for ruining everything????U guys dont it.
DeleteVivien, you better stop feeding those 3 girls. Let them go home. These men are so pathetic. Alloy, the world is a mess yes but God's plan was not for the women to be unproductive. It is His plan for the man to be the head yes but men have become lazy by themselves. Mothers raise girls to be hardworking and men to be taken care of. How many of you task your sons to really work. The girls are chastised for everything in the name of being groomed to be a good wife but how many of you say, let him play games o he is a boy. When we women start training our boys better they will not feel so entitled to everything. As for those of you fending for men that do not deserve it..please continue, he will be giving your ego to those small girls. Now for the others with husbands that have fallen on hard times, please support your men. They need your help. There is nothing wrong with helping out when the tide is down for your husband. You will know a worthwhile man because he will not sit down and fold his arms, he will struggle. For those of you that earn more than your husbands, please show respect, do not throw it in his face. Men that are so insecure, please marry a woman that has no potential to make more than you, because some of you are so weak. Everything is a threat to your silly ego.
ReplyDeleteWord..very on point! I only have boys and my prayer is to be able to raise them as responsible self sufficient men.. May God grant all of our prayers on our children.
DeleteAll the sdk housewives are silent.interesting
ReplyDelete@jay Blaze, n u know those who are housewives on this platform? Co's u re what? Their houseboy? Or their gardener? U must be an insider eg driver to know what's happening in people's home, cos u know those that are housewives, smh. People just come on here to blab rubbish.
DeleteMy husband is a useless and shameless man. We are 1year in marriage, this man stole the jewery my sister inlaw gave 2me as my wedding gift, he sold them, I kept asking the goat he said he didn't see them, until he took jewery worth 15m from this same sister of his, e sold them too, that was how I put. 1 and 2gedaa n found out e took mine. He lies Alot, e can borrow 4 Africa and not pay back, if u insist wahala go start. Am just scared 4 my self, if I strt working he will suck me dry. Cos if anybody gives me money and he is aware he will find away 2 collect d money from me.i am sick and tired of him,u won't blive d person that cover our. Wedding the fool is still owing the man money, I borrowed 150 from my mum4him till 2day e never pay o, over a year am tired of him don't know what 2 do
ReplyDeleteWhere una dey get all these men sef?One year and you are already crying wolf..
DeleteDidn't you date him before getting married to him??..
Oriegwu!!!..
Where una dey get all these men sef?One year and you are already crying wolf..
DeleteDidn't you date him before getting married to him??..
Oriegwu!!!..
Comments like urs @anon 7:23,was what healed,and made me appreciate my marriage and husband more.
Deletewhere una dey get these men from?????
Anonymous 3:40pm leave the lazy arse nigger and don't look back......his family are very stupid people, just leave and they will soon look for another ATM for their brother......u don't need them in your life Abeg....as for you Vivian you better start saving and only do little in that house....am very sure their brother gives them the impression he brings all the money.....only u can really access if your hubby is lazy or not but u better start saving money.....99 percent of men are not to be trusted and no matter how humble u are they will always feel cranky if they r not the breadwinner....
ReplyDeleteBwahahahaha!!!!
DeleteShe needs need them more than they need her.
Did d men ask u to be d breadwinners???u guys simply volunteered cos u ve unresolved issues in ur lives and d men would be foolish not to d offer.
There is no dignity in labour/hardwork,people use work as an escape route and that's y I love my life,I do whatever I want,I dont ve sleepless night cos of some office politics,chasing accounts here and there.........give d wheels back to d men and stop clutching @straws.
Na wa o... This marriage sef!
ReplyDeleteHello house....just testing
ReplyDeleteAlloy, where do I send your wet kiss to you, well said.
ReplyDeleteGod created the woman to help the man , Kappish !!
Alloy, where do I send your wet kiss to , well said.
ReplyDeleteGod created the woman to help the man , Kappish !!