Okay,so you snooped in on his phone,you saw the sms' and the nude pics from another lady and you confronted him,he cried,apologised and pass worded his phone and now you are a mess because you cant see more?LMAO!
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Its like getting addicted to hard drugs,once you start,you cant stop!
Lover onise stop it!
BLOG VISITOR Says'' I am supposed to get married soon...i said 'supposed' because I am yet to pick a date. The Thing is, i don't trust the man I'm dating...He has lied to me several times in the past about girls i know he has things with. He has a lot of naked pictures on his phone from different girls and he is constantly on his phone and pass-wording it so i wont have access.
The last time i got a hold of the phone and checked, i was shocked at the kind of messages i saw and even the pictures! I confronted him and he apologized and told me he would stop but the thing is that i don't believe him cos he has even gone to the extent of bringing them to his house!
I'm confused cos i love him BUT i don't know if i can leave with this fear that he will never change.
Please help publish cos i need to know what people think!
i need help!''
*Is your Phone innocent?..some babes check their man's phone but their phones cannot come to equity!
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For me, I think it's my right to check if my boyfriend is faithful because I am.
ReplyDeleteI can't put up with cheats, so when I see something I find my levels abeg.
Why won't I check? I will check oh. That's my own opinion. There are still responsible and faithful men out there, I dated one.
I check my boyfriend's phones, laptop, everything. If I'm having unprotected sex with you, fuck it! I deserve to know if you're just doing me or you have some backups.
God punish you when I find out. One time I made my boyfriend pay me $2000 because I suspected he cheated. I know he did, bastard will never admit it.
Black men with their big African heads are cheats. I'm just going to marry a white man. Thank God I have one already.
DeleteMumu so white people don't cheat?infact he would degrade u by telling u to suck his balls n lick his ass hole..mumu..
DeleteWelcome back from europe anon. I wasn't the one who sent you to do prostitution. Yes I'm going to marry a white man, at least they are sincere n they don't cheat as much as ur nigerian men do. Now go and die. Idiotic fellow.
DeleteHmmmm Stella. Let her snoop o.
ReplyDeleteatleast when the trust is earned she would cool down.
without snooping she wont understand him well.
Is good to check your husband's phone once in a while.I discovered my husband has a 10years old boy through his phone.This is a guy i dated for 10good years and we've been married for 8years. We started dating when i was 17years old,disvirgined me ,plus lot of abortions.I was still believing God for a child when i found out about the child.please check your partner's phone once in awhile...this is my 50cents.
DeleteMe, I had my boyfriends password. He never knew. I never nagged or confronted him concerning all the cheatings with different bitches kept finding out. But my snooping only killed our relationship. I could no longer bear him touch me, not even with a finger,it was just so disgusting after all what I knew. DoG! Dog in man's skin.
DeleteWell, I got into another relationship and snooping was totally out of da question. Why, most men will always be dogs. What you don't know really doesn't hurt. I know he isn't a saint, but not knowing the sordid details just keeps me going fine.
I advice ladies to snoop abeg. That's how I met 1 cool Abj guy and we were forming serious relationship without sex yet but we were doing some touching body. When I decided to get down with him, I told myself I needed to go through his phone.
DeleteI looked forward to having his phone to myself till 1 day we were about driving out when his mechanic just came in with his car he caught him cruising town with and he just jumped out of the car raking the mechanic. I don't know what explanations the mechanic gave but the next thing I saw, they left in the car.
I had to come down and drive the car to safe parking while waiting for him.
Lo and behold, he left his phone by the corner of the drivers seat next to the door as if he was hiding it.
Na so I grab am o, straight to messages(inbox 1st) wetin my eyes see ehn...........
A text from a girl accusing him of tearing the condom way into lovemaking. That she's sure he wants to share his "HIV"
A text from an Abj chick that was out of town and missing his big dick
A text from a girl telling him to return her hard earned money. Insulting him that his 419 will kill him.
A text from another girl saying he treated her like shit by sending her out of his house by 2am after f**king hell out of her without even giving her transport.
Then his sent messages na die. He even sent a text to a number he saved as "my baby" saying he was out of town to return in 3 days time.
Pictures nko!!!!! I saw all types of nudes.
That was the END o and to imagine I "thought" he was the 1. I just advised myself.
He came back, we went out, he droped me at home and that was the end.
Dear ladies, snoop if you aren't sure but be smart about it.
Poster, he isn't doing you a favor by marrying you. Opt out today to save blog visitors from stories that touch............
So many pieces of advice just for women. Men should try and be good people for fuck sake!!!!!
DeleteStella I'm proudly team snooping. I don snoop so tey my husband is scared of giving me his phone to recharge for him when he's too busy to do that. Whenever I'm around, he guides his phone as if it's his life line, at night, he will put it under his pillow n sleep, but me that one no barricade me, I still stylishly get it out somehow when he's fast asleep. I don't get to see anything most times bcos he deletes it. How did I end up this 'bad', one day, long time ago he gave me recharge card to load for him, I take style snoop n I saw an eye opener from his supposedly office secretary, about how d shediot(by name shade) was not able to sleep d prev night thinking of his father's di*k. Long story sha but for another day. Gain: it helped me to buckon up in terms of demanding, yes I don't give him breathing space, I can't lose on both sides, mbanu chukwu aju. A man that cheats remains that way, doesn't worth killing yourself for biko! But when u see it b/4 marriage, no need entering at all. NB. Part of my demand was to fire d sheidiot n he did, btw when I confronted him he denied as usual, n was like me? That bonga fish?? God forbid! All na wash, I aren't a kid nau!! I just did what I got to do. So my dears, snoop at any given time for ur own gud.
DeleteBLOG ANALYSER: I snoop around infact I am the serial investigator! Lol. I have not been caught.
DeleteWhen something is not right, you will know. Every woman has something called intuition and you can learn to sharpen it. If you have the nudge to want to find out, it's highly probable that something is wrong, check it out but not necessarily by snooping. Ask questions and when he is answering, listen with all your physical senses as well as with your 6th and intuitive sense. You won't miss whatever it is you are looking for. One very bad thing with snooping is you might not know how to deal with the information you get.
Delete1000 likes anon 10:55am. #team snoop# mine changed his password again. I would decode it soon. I have all the babes number but I have nothing to do with them only with my husband who is the dog! I collect money from him whenever I confront him. I call it compensation because a dog will always be a dog! I cannot lose also.
DeleteMy dear am also team snooping any day,any time. Dese men are dogs! God!! It is really heartbreaking. Am in a relationship with dis guy and I check his fone regularly, and I always see one bullshit or d oda. I av decided not to take him serious again. My dear don't make d mistake of entering dt marriage
DeleteDIS STELLA SEF.. YOU ANNOY ME WITH UR POST SOMETIMES. SO UNTIL SHE HAS HIV AND AIDS THEN NA THEN SHE GO KNOW SAY THE SERIAL LOVER SHE IS ABOUT TO GET MARRIED TO HAS GONE WILD. IF SHE DOES NOT SNOOP HOW WILL SHE KNOW.. PLEASE ABEG O... SNOOP TILL U CANTT AKE IT ANY MORE AND YOU CHOOSE BETWEEN STAYING OR LEAVING.. BEST ADVCE RUN!!!!! AS FAST AS U CAN.. HE WILL NEVER CHANGE..OK! SO I CAN GOSSIP AND SNOOP INTO MY FRIENDS BUSINESS BUT NOT MY BF?? HELL NO... WE ARE ONEE, SO MY PHONE IS HIS PHONE AND HIS PHONE IS MY PHONE, NO STORY.... #SHERIFATU
ReplyDeleteAs in ehn God bless you, you spoke my mind.. what d hell are u saying Stella. Its people like you dat date serial womanizers and then when u get married to them and he starts showing his true colour, you'll say ohh he wasn't like dt, truth is he was buh u were too stupid and naive to know. Any man who passwords his fone without letting you knw d pasword should be a big sign that you are in a danger zone!!! You do not need a soothsayer, this is the truth,buh most times we girls are too naive and blind to shit and den it explodes in our faces, for all you knw you could be dating a pedophile or a drug addict or even a murderer, how would you know if you do not have access to his personal interactions, i'm not saying act all crazy and James Bond like buh it shouldn't even be an issue in a relationship if you want to go through his phone you should be allowed to.. honestly ladies no need to fool ourselves!!! We all know the truth!!
DeleteSherifatu chop knuckle. Many woman Don die because of what dem no know about their man. My mom found out about dad's mistress in the days of letter writing sef. In one letter the lady said mom's cough was due to her juju until dad buys her a car like mom's. Hmmm kasala burst and mom went for prayers and is alive today. Fast forward to this day of fone, Stella nwanne I go snooooooooop
DeleteHmmmmmmm well I used to do it but not anymore. Not for the fear factor though, but for his right to his personal device and privacy. Men as much as women need their space. Hence his cell phone I wouldn't concern my self with. I am a strong woman with a strong character, and my motto is, that a man cheats doesn't mean that he doesn't love his wife or GF... some may call it insecurity or that u are consoling yourself. well it works for me.
DeleteHowever I tell him that if he cheats it had better be with a lady prettier than me or more intelligent. Anything short of this is our collective shame and I will fight him silly. Enjoy ur privacy until the dye is cast. So eh, why bother me head? Keeping it from me is enough respect, and I can live with that until further notice. That's all.
Sisi Eko
DeleteYou already called it, "insecurity " that's your problem. People like you piss me off.
He should cheat with someone prettier than you or more intelligent "smh" you need help. As long as he keeps it from you abi? I just pray he doesn't infect you with HIV... give your self some self worth please.
SMH!
@sisi eko, die not dye... thank me later.
DeleteAnonymous cum corrector. Thank u jare na 'die'.
DeleteMadame 12:30am, u don vex? Please no vex o. This is MY opinion and stance, I already said ahead that some of u will tag it 'insecurity'... far from it darling. If I had to narrate my stories based on this alone this blog won't contain it. Hence my verdict. I am the last person to be called a complexed female. Let's just say I love my sanity. I need help? Nah, I already got the help I needed, which is to steer clear of snooping because I want to live long. If it is ur wish to stalk urs, then that's ur prerogative. Leave me with mine
By the way anonymous 12:30, I just grasped the last bit u said about 'self worth' Pls educate me, does ur self worth come from snooping and catching ur man cheat? Or ur self worth is attained when u block out the thoughts of ur spouse cheating from ur mind, maintaining ur lane, and from not snooping around on him? Na question I ask o. Thank u
DeleteIt is actually dye not dye. It's an English saying. Check your knowledge of English before you correct other people's grammar and spelling.
DeleteBiko what is this anon 8:44 talking about? Lmao u are obviously extremly clueless so il spare u. Me n sisi eko know what we talking about, but u my dear are so clueless. Assignment for u: go ponder, singular; die, plural; dice. Cheers.
DeleteI plan to install a GPS navigator on my husband's fore head when am married...i no fit judge case
ReplyDeleteU can only search his fone if u gonna break up when u see anything bad. Its actually stupid to go thru fones,see things,confront him,argue and still settle. It means u'll always see and settle, so save ursef d heartache and stay away frm his fone
DeleteWarning sign. Don't make the mistake of getting married to him because he's a cheat and you don't trust him. How can you even think of getting married to someone you don't trust?
ReplyDeleteA man that has girls nude pictures on his, getting married to you won't make him stop cheating.
Don't marry a man you don't trust.
ReplyDeleteMy dear one, if you can't trust him, u better bail out now that you're yet to commit.
ReplyDeleteAs you probably know, marriage ain't gonna change him and for you the hand writing on the wall is very legible.
Ultimately, the decision is your's; but I wouldn't advice you to go ahead since you're massively in doubt already.
Click my name for all your celebration cakes n cupcakes, cheers
Thats the question .. Is your phone innocent ? I had this issue with my ex too.
ReplyDeleteIf you know your phone is not innocent then don't snoop. Make una they give yourselves different strains of HIV. Ebola don join sef. If you know you are innocent, pick race as soon as you discover he's a perv!
DeleteThat is ehnn. The numerous girls my ex had things with. And when I catch him he will say "is your phone innocent?" And I will gladly give him my phone. Useless being. I wasn't playing smart I was honestly innocent with mine.
DeleteJust like d man that brought his life story yesterday, u r seeing d hand writing on d wall now, make ur decision. One thing is 4 sure 'u can't change him' I'm not saying u should marry him or not, it's ur decision 2 make.
ReplyDeleteMadam poster, your fiance's case is a chronic one. He won't change. That is for sure. If you can live with his "possible infidelity" when you guys are married, then go ahead with the wedding..
ReplyDeleteWhatever you decide, goodluck!
@madam cake. You have never given good advice on marriage and relationship matters. why?
DeleteIf you have a happy marriage, I don't think you would be this vindictive towards it. Try and see the brighter side of life so that happiness will not elude you. and above all try to be a good wife coz the reward is profitable. @poster, if you love him talk to him about it
I will advice you to quit the relationship since you are not married. Any relationship without trust will surely collapse . You can't change a cheat
ReplyDeletePassword. Hhmmmmm
ReplyDeleteAm 25. Broke up with my main bf a month again over suspicious activity. Of cos u can nevr catch dis playas red handed.
ReplyDeleteWat broke the camels back was quite minor compared to what i have taken from him.
Went over to his for the weekend from work, he had made ma dinner..and we wer watching tv..i laid down and placed ma legs on his lap. He was in a sitting position. From my laid down view i saw em end several chats.
The fool ddnt knw i could see em with my side eye, as God would have it...a call came thru, this was 10:50pm. He uses the blackberyy Q10. My company just gave that fone to me as well as an official line if not i wouldnt have caught on.
Anyway he swiped to the right(ended the call) and swiped left(pretended to pick it) and was forming conversation to himself for a full 2mins.
All the while i was boiling. Till the call came in again and e did d exact same thing.
At that point, his cup ran over. I was done turning a blind eye at all the shit.
He was my main. But am done wth the lying cheating son of a bitch.
He was your main bf, meaning there are other side guys?
DeleteSo you both are birds of a feather?
#justasking
Lol, you're so alert
DeleteMy dear, you reap what you sow. You have a main and minor(s) and yet you are complaining?
DeleteMain bf na wa. You deserve him
DeleteSo why complain when you have back ups? It shows u too get comma jor
DeleteStella, u are so funny. God bless you. Sisters, what u don't know cannot kill u inugo.
ReplyDeleteAt dis tym and age some guys are foolish Enuf 2 leave raunchy messages and pix on their phone. My gf can never catch me with that snooping stunt. Too old school mehn. Omo guys wey wan play hard, 2 words: GET BRAIN.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahahaaha...I hear you!!..LMAO...
DeleteTrue talk.
DeleteNo mind stella..RUN as fast as your legs could carry o..Not like you guys are married sef..If you can stand it,call it all up.Simple!!!
ReplyDeleteYou must know the kind of a man you have before snooping...
ReplyDeleteMe,I snoop and my man is comfortable with it...hell will let lose infact,the house will be on fire anyday he start locking his phone...so for me,snooping is allowed...
Poster,once a cheat is always a cheat..he will never stop..
Since he does not rub it on your face,forgive him...
Linda, u get am. I don't snoop but the day my man uses a password on his phone, ife ga eme....
DeleteI Dnt bother snooping cos wenever I do I almost get a heart attack. No need jor. My pple say wot u Dnt no will not kill u. Queen.
ReplyDeleteMy dear what you don't know kills faster these days, shine your eyes.
DeleteWhen he bring sickness home, u tell the sickness u don't know each other, or tell him to go back. So that u can live forever, go face reality joor!
DeleteNa so one man travel go UK come back. Biscuit wen em buy come back give em wife na HIV. Taaaa..... !. Ifa hear. #TeamSnoopers. Prevents stories that touch biko.
DeleteDebby the gf of D**o is dis u? Bera leave dt asswipe of a guy! Anywayz, na u sabi! Every mallam with him kettle.
ReplyDeleteBabe na you wear the shoe,if you know you can cope by all means go ahead,but if you no strong reach no force yourself o.
ReplyDeletetrust me all men are not like that.
jo
Well sometimes, it pays to check. My hubby started this affair six months after we got married. He was always locking himself up in d toilet when he comes back from work and sometimes receiving calls while we are sleeping. So I went snooping and o my God, the lady just had an abortion. So I started distributing her no. My MIL called her and she said my hubby promised to marry her. Mumu girl. After receiving so many strange calls cussing her, na she decide to leave my hubby for me. So sometimes, it pays. It worked for me. But I've stopped after having my second baby. I don't really care again.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteWow!!...
DeleteAswear men re bastards!!! Just six months??? God will punish all dose women chasing married men!!!
DeleteAre u sure that there won't be another girl? Would u apply the same tactic to get rid of her? What if she's the ' ain't got non to lose' type and she levels up with u? Just asking o
DeleteAnd was only the girl u ppl were cussing
DeleteUr hubby that went after her nko?
Well get ready to keep calling girl's number...that is if u don't caution ur hubby
I think happiness is what we need to work hard to achieve, snooping etc on your spouse will do you more harm than good. I believe it's an addiction you find it hard to stop.
ReplyDeleteI snoop on my husband's phone once in a while to know what's up. What ve I not seen? His Sexy chat on Badoo,fb,whatsapp n all. We ladies naturally love snooping so there is no big deal jare. I ve known a lot of things frm snooping. Snooping has made me realise never to swear or put my life on d line for anybody. We all ve password on our phones now. I put my pswd cos of my kids n his cos of me Hahahahaha. Nothing wey I never see
ReplyDeleteSame here.. I passcoded my phone too!! Every body needs their privacy joor.. I don't even care anymore cos life is too short to be miserable..
DeleteAnon 9:48pm. We are on the same wave length.
DeleteSame here,I care less.life short jo
DeleteNa wetin eye dey find, eye dey see!!
ReplyDeleteIgnorance sometime is bliss
And also u don't need to snoop before you know what a man is up to.
DeleteJust be observant and smart.
If your man is on FB, whatsapp, BBm etc all day and night, what else do you want to see when the hand writing is already on the wall !
please, snoop on jare!. Hey! That nigga ain't gonna change. FYI. PS: ask him to un-password his phone. Or are u afraid of him gboor? You can't be afraid of someone u've been 'chopping '(I'm assuming so)
ReplyDeleteI can never stop snooping my husband's phone lailai. I snoop whenever the opportunity comes. Abeg there is always a urge to snoop no matter how much you trust your husby
ReplyDeleteGbam! Tomiwealth. Esp with all their kurekere moves.
DeleteThe Nigeria we live in encourages rubbish. All I will say is marriage does not change a person so what you see now is what you get if you decide to go ahead
ReplyDeleteStop snooping! @poster, if u marry this guy shaa, your name go be sorry@ineedBVadvice.always.com
ReplyDeletei love my life ,hear no evil,see no evil ,i dont poke nose in oga s phone oh
ReplyDeleteEwww!
ReplyDeletePlease poster, dude isn't ready to marry.
He is still living like an undergraduate.
Double ewww
Bad move! Dont do it!
ReplyDeleteCos if d man is cheating,na yawaaa be dat o
Unless of course u are just going via his phone just for d sake of it
Buh if its for snooping,ha,u are on ur own
Know someone her hubby passworded his phone n she wanted to get d Password
I was shocked!
Not cos she wanted d password
Buh cos for him.to password his phone n not tell her d Password means one thing n one thing only: He isnt clean
Was embarrased n I told her to forget Abt getting d Password n see d "obvious" implication of à hubby passwording his phone n leaving his wife in d dark.
Postér,i hope dat if there's anything u have learnt here its dat u dont marry à man,hoping to change him afterwards.
Its À Bad Ass Mistake baby!
Am going anonymous on this. A couple of hours ago I stumbled on a female nude pics on my bf laptop . He actually lock his fone and laptop with a password and I suspected he's been hiding stuff, this time I just wanted to help with his homework. Guess wot he said when he saw me staring with the Ebola ridden pics with my mouth wide open? I can't trust u with my stuff, u keep snooping around, besides is an old pics.... I saw this on his recent item! Still in shock! Would I say ignorance is bliss or wot? He didn't even apologize. The nerve of him! I'm very furious and confused rite now .
ReplyDeleteYou can't be confused. The hand writing is on the wall. Can you cope or not ? He obviously doesn't care about your feelings
DeleteThanks anon 10:21 the ass wipe obviously doesn't deserve me either, am longer confused. I have made up my mind to leave him before he does.
DeleteLeave d Guy now if u cant Copé wit his bullshit! Or stay n let him Dish u d nudies.Imagine d temerity! Dis one is insult upon injury! Ha!
DeleteDear poster pls deviate frm this act of going thru ur guy,s fone it has destroyed many relationships.IF EYE NO SEE OR EAR NO HEAR BELLE NO GO BITTER.my two cents.gudluck
ReplyDeleteMy dear no talk ooo.. Snooping made my friend kw that her hubby has another family a wife and 3kids.. he actually married the women after her married her #teamsnooping all the way
DeleteThe truth is God blessed women with high intuitive faculties. You always have that gut feeling when your man is cheating so you really don't need to snoop. Personally, I don't believe in snooping unless you are looking for motivation to quit that relationship because let's be honest, how many women leave their marriages or relationships because of the outcome of their "investigation"? Very few and in most of the few cases, infidelity is only part of the reason they left. As for the poster, as painful as it might be, the good part is now you know the man. Can you spend the rest of your life with him knowing there'll always be others? Please don't make that fundamental error most women make of hoping a man will change after marriage. There rarely do rather they get worse because they now have you locked down and familiarity sets in. Honey, kisses may turn frogs to princes in fairytales but in reality some frogs only grow into fatter frogs regardless of a million and three kisses.
ReplyDeleteHe was your main, he was your main? Meaning you were also cheating abi? Why you come dey provoke nah?
ReplyDeleteWhirlwind,do you expect her to put all eggs inside one basket?...every single girl should always have a Plan B...
Delete@Queen, not only single girls oh, every woman, married or not, old and young !!! Always ve "PLAN B"
DeleteLinda Eze I am with you on dis o.if person nr marry 2 husbands how u go know d one wey better pass?lol
DeleteSTELLA, YOU ARE TOTALLY WRONG HERE! "The two shall become one flesh . . ." There should be nothing to hide. Now that the girl has seen all the "skeletons" the supposed "husband" has in the cupboard, it is left for her to agree to spend the rest of her life with the man and his "skeletons" or say no and wait with a calm and peaceful heart. "Snooping" should not even be mentioned in a marriage. They should be able to see each other as they are! It is better to say "no" to a proposal than divorce after 73 days.
ReplyDeleteNo comment. #UseYourMind
ReplyDeleteim not mad he's cheating. i'm mad he's SO SLOPPY with it. U can leave him for the sloppiness but not the cheating because your next bf will probably do the same. Sad world we live in.
ReplyDeleteI wennt thru my hubbby fone n chat, I saw tinz oh, I confronted himm and he apologies, dat same nite I went thru his fone again saw fresh new chat wit d same person. I can never trust him again, I don't just feel anytin for him again. Let's just live like dat, am so heart broken...
ReplyDeleteThis is funny hahahahahahaha...Men Men Men!!!...
DeleteOriegwu..
Him be Mr dangerous
DeleteLinda u are too funny, hahahaha, are u helping matters or worsening it
DeleteMy dear anon 10:25. U will get over it, focus on ur children and on ur job or better still tell him ur mind
As for u original poster, it is d hand u give men during courtship that they will continue in marriage. Don't ever tolerate what u won't continue, me I'm proudly team snooping, even though I've been too busy these days but I started it during courtship, my hubby wanted to form vex but I vexed more that only someone who has something to hide passwords his phone, now he knows I know his password & I told him he dares not change it unless he's hiding stuff, the day I caught him deleting messages I told him "oh u r hiding stuff abi?" now he says he doesn't delete again, loool, we just keep trying my sister, MEN!!!
Haba 10:25 pm you sef did u expect him to change same day. Be realistic jo
DeleteSue sometimes that issue of courtship doesn't count.I dated my hubby for 9 yrs before we got married.And in all d 9 yrs,I never for once caught him cheating.we lived in the same neighborhood.so we always saw a great deal of each other.visited each other unannounced.went to d same uni.we visited each other in sch unannounced as well.so we courted as long as we could.we've been married for 8 yrs now.but now I can't vouch for him.not that I snoop,but my intuition never lies.and wen I tell him abt my intuitions,he arranges himself.so long as he doesn't rub it in my face.respect me and our home.
DeleteMost Nigerian women are really silly and now I get it. With families and friends dishing our such moronic advise as this, why won't men get away with their philandering ways. Msheeew
ReplyDeleteDon't snoop if your guts tell you to and nip whatever affair there is in the bud or end the relationship. Wait until he infects you with an incurable STD AND DUMPS YOU, then your eyes will clear.
Dear poster, there are good and decent men out there, trust me, don't sentence yourself to a life time of misery and unhappiness all in the name of marriage.
ReplyDeleteHe will not change and is likely to get worse and worst after marriage.You have seen the signs oh, don't bother praying or hoping he will change, take a walk.
I just stop going 2 church bcos my hubby who is a pst is sleeping with a church member n I kn her. I confronted my hubby n he is sobber according to him" am feeling betray, should I confront d girl? Help please
ReplyDeleteWhy stop going to church. pick up your life and live again, if you have kids devout you attention to them. For what its worth you have to forgive him to move forward, towards the path to healing. if you keep asking him why, you probably will not get any sane answer from him. i think you should talk to a senior pastor in the church who is also a marriage counselor. Never seize praying.
DeleteWhat are you still waiting for?confront the girl if na me,I for don break bottle tey tey...
DeleteChai Anon!..Your hubby Pst has been during it before.He will still do it again, He just waiting for the dust to settle and continue from where He left it .
DeleteI think you should not confront her, she might be hostile to you . Instead work on your so call hubby Pst and see if you can keep him in check, If not seek an alternative.
What are you still waiting for?confront the girl if na me,I for don break bottle tey tey...
DeleteMadam pls dat shldnt stop u from going to church and do not confront her cos she might insult u or say hurting words to u. Your hubby must have told her,try and work on ur hubby(if u can). Pls iron ur clothes and prepare for church dis sunday and put up a bright face(shine ur teeth well well).
DeleteWhy confront her. Face your hubby please. It might have been a one time thing.
DeleteYou should disgrace your husband,he's not new to the game.If you keep quiet,he will continue.
DeleteReport him to the pastor so that fear will enter his body ie if the pastor isn't into he same thing
Pele ooo
Interesting,I snoop a lot before and after marriage..when I was dating my husband he is a lady's man,supercool intelligent,smart and very comfortable with loads of friends but he came out so clean to me,I read his chats with the friends and everyone knew me...if I see any babe call him dear it's a big fight and he started pass wording his phone calling me fighter that he doesn't want issues and he stopped talking to lot of them and he still doesn't give me his phone password and I v his prepaid,debit and credit card pin cos I use it anytime I want but I dnt v hubby's phones password...he said when I stop looking for an issue where der is no issue he ll open it..loool
ReplyDeleteEasy on him and don't hen pick him to death! You have a good man and you had better chill out before you loose it all. If anyone wants to cheat without your knowledge, it pretty easy... Man/woman, if you build a solid relationship without unnecessary shadowing/undercover agent, then you've nothing to fear or worry about.
DeleteA big lol at u for being naive, dt is just d lies dese liars tell us to deceive us. Dey try to make it seem as if we re looking for trouble where dere is none. wen dere is really fire on d mountain. Wy shld ur hubby av a password on his fone and U don't know d password. Biko shine ur brain
DeleteYour husband get brain. It's the ones that come out clean gangan you shouldn't trust
DeleteLinda, I get you o jare but my point is she should take it easy on the dude and forgive since it is not like she is 100 percent faithful as well. He who comes to equity must come with clean hands.
ReplyDeleteI never regretted snooping on my ex, cx I realised he was making another plan while I was preparing for 3weeks nysc camp. snoop once in a while and follow ur instincts. Men are greedy and selfish by nature, the warning signs are already there now, for u to know what ur marraige wit him wud luk like. Men hardly change
ReplyDeleteI encourage snooping 100%. And now dt u have seen, it's will only make u stronger and wiser. You alrdy know his true nature so u have to know what u are abt to enter. Cx marraige won't change him over 9t. I wil advise u to pause on marraige and turn the matter to God. Its better to cry now than cry later while married. Remember, wat doesn't kill u will only make u stronger
ReplyDeleteIf not for snooping,I wldnt av known dat bastard was married with a kid and he was promising heaven and earth,but I knew he was hiding things! Wen I found out,I dnt even confront him,I got in touch wit his wife and did she relay my msg to her dog-hubby!
ReplyDeletei would have loved to remain single but the prospect of growing old alone scares me. parents be like hurry up your mate don marry born finish. friends be like have you seen my asoebi its out. neighbors be like mama sade pickin wedding na next week giving you the side look. colleagues nko. so everybody expects you to tie the knot by fire by force. Na we ladies dey born dis men abi. so what kind of training are we giving them. The monsters we breed as men......
ReplyDeleteDouble like for dis ur comment @lovelace
DeleteExactly!!!!!! Na women dey breed this men. So mothers do better pls.
DeleteHow can stella be talking like this.. I am so sure ur white husband is fucking some white german girl and u dey here they console urself.. until u get ebola+Hiv then you will know it is good to snoop..... Snoop and lets live abeg... No time.. God punish the man that will hide his phone from me... Na thunder go fire am...#sindodo
ReplyDeleteSikiratu, yaff take it personal hehehe!
DeleteI tink any woman who refuses to snoop is already afraid her husband is cheating.
We who snoop, most times can't accept dat our rltnshp is true.
@ 10;34 ur mind is so messed up. #Chai!
Stella na waa to you ooo!!! Me I snoop soteyyy I wake up at night when my hubby is fast asleep ,take his fon to the loo and look thru from whatsap to text to pictures,sometimes I even send whatsapp just to see the response,ah!!! I can't be overtaken by events ooo,I need to nib any moves in the bud..I haven't gotten a heart attck yet though!!!!hehehehehehe
ReplyDeleteAm even allowed to go thru my bf's fone cos he trust me not to go thru his msg but once on a while I go thru his msgs and what do I see..the usual chyking of gals from ph, warri, abj, lag..hmmmm sometimes I wonder y most men are flirts..definitely dumping him..I still believe snooping is the best form of defense from regrets
ReplyDeleteRun for your life.
ReplyDeleteSDK im team snooping o. I snooped and found out my hubby was having an affair. I didn't leave him cos let's be real, very few women do. He's a good husband and a great father to our 2 kids.
ReplyDeleteBenefit of snooping for me: I stopped being so naive and trusting. I now have my own bank account. My own money and better equipped to deal with any bullshit that happens to the marriage. If I didn't snoop and catch him cheating, I would have continued living on fantasy island. Putting all my hard earned money in one useless joint account. Its always good to be prepared abeg.
AIDS is real madam
DeleteI snoop, no not snoop, call him and sit with him and question him about strange msgs and he does same on my phone. We may both have secret lives but we understand that we have to respect this relationship. We dey inside together.
ReplyDeleteMe I snoop unto in law matter. My husband I trust pass my children's bowel movement. He so doesn't have time for extra affairs.
ReplyDeleteI snoop to know what happening with his colleagues, work and other matters. Because he won't tell me. Then I bring it up and we discuss it. So yes he knows I go through his phone he just doesn't know when. We have each other's password for everything and even have synchronised phones. Definitely team snoop
For the single ladies,snoop for as long u may wanna keep dumpin,ok? till menopause catches up wit y'al #rubbish ...u better ask the married ones on how they deal wif their cheatin husbands!!!Cos,trust me,yor next boyfriend is stil gonna cheat on your stupid ass!!! Men are polygamist in nature!!! Monogamy is only practiced theoretical! Deal with this,bye!
ReplyDeletemale ashawo aids is real o. no vex
DeleteWho is this foooool? Because you are a man you will cheat and wommen will deal with it? I am a guy and all I have to tell you sucker is that he'll awaits. God gave us men power here on earth but if we abuse it heavens gate is closed. So many complaints about men. Nigger aren't you ashamed???? Can't we as nigeria men be the best?
DeleteIs very important to snoop, I got my hubby this morning tru is BBM. Pinging his ex girl that is even married, telling her how much he wish to be with her and the ex telling him same too. I confronted him and told him I needed a divorce. This man ran to church to bring his pastor to come and settle the issue. At least I kn his cheating
ReplyDeleteI am not a serial snooper but i snoop as the spirit leads. No apology for anyone; dude has cheated on me once before. My antenna is raised upppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
ReplyDeleteOh dear!
ReplyDeleteWith all these comments, it's safe to assume all men cheat.
Na wa.
Women, both those that have caught their men and those that have not, had better wake up, smell the coffee and be smart.
@Pastor's wife; FASTING AND PRAYER! You can still win your husband back. Then encourage him to tell the church. Of course, they should suspend him (1 Cor. 5 & 1 Cor. 6) and restore him (Gal. 6). Even if they don't ('cos sometimes these "pastors" are not clean), he should withdraw from the church and set his soul and house in order before attending to the house of God. Pray also for that lady; don't hate. She is in captivity too. Guess she's a member of the Church; it's your husband that will report what they did! God's Grace.
ReplyDeleteMadam poster if u know u can't stand his stupid ways now,better stroll out of that marriage,I bet u wen he gets married to u,he will grow worse .we still have good men in nigeria abeg,. Snooping is so allowed,if u have the heart to snoop,abeg no waste time cos it helps a whole lot. My hubby passworded his fone and I know his password,inshut na me be him PA even when he made dinner for the family I dy do sanitation for fone,dy look around.
ReplyDeleteMadam poster if u know u can't stand his stupid ways now,better stroll out of that marriage,I bet u wen he gets married to u,he will grow worse .we still have good men in nigeria abeg,. Snooping is so allowed,if u have the heart to snoop,abeg no waste time cos it helps a whole lot. My hubby passworded his fone and I know his password,inshut na me be him PA even when he made dinner for the family I dy do sanitation for fone,dy look around.
ReplyDeleteAll the men in dis blog have gone on vacation abi?The world we live in is a terrible place.See how women here are all saying the same story.Why do men cheat?Women are not exempted too but its like an ebola virus which was hs been genetically engineered into d DNA of men to cheat.The annoying part is 90% of dis women dey cheat with cnt even be compared with dir beautiful wife....This is my adivice to all women with a cheating husband.Say this prayer daily .EVERY WOMAN THAT WANTS TO OR IS SLEEPING
ReplyDeleteWITH MY HUSBAND..LET THE THUNDEROUS FIRE OF THE HOLY GHOST DESTROY EVERY PATH OR MEMORY SHE HAS WITH MY HUBBY..EVERY FRIEND DAT WILL CAUSE OR LEAD MY HUBBY TO CHEAT LET THE FIRE OF GOD DESTROY THEIR FRIENSHIP..Women you hv to try nd be pleasing too to ur hubby.If you are fat loose weight,if you dress tacky try nd dress sharply,if you dnt cook good meals learn ,buy cookry books,try nd be more romantic,say nice things to him,appreciate even d little he gives, try some silly bedroom antics and most of all be prayerful nd always bring him along...cheers ma ladies...
Nnee change that ya prayer from any lady to my husband. Thunder fire husband who made a pact with you abd breaks it nit the lady outside. So many men lie about their marital status. Nonsense and ingredient prayer
Delete@ anon 5:47am, babe, some women do all that and more and men still cheat...No be man, marry Halle berry and cheated on her.. There r so many cases like that.. If u like know how to "do the do" from here to the moon and back, men will still cheat!! The thing is this, make urself happy cos happiness comes from within and from God, men can't give u happiness neither marriage... Focus on what's important, ur health, kids, family and friends.. Make it ur responsibility to see that u guys go for medical checkup as often as possible!!! These guys ain't loyal.. It's only divine intervention will save cheating men.. Have a "PLAN B", whatever that means to u!!
DeleteNa me invent snooping o. That was then. Immeadiately my phone touch phone,str8 to inbox. From there to outbox. He doesn't password lock his phone,still doesn't bt that one no mean anything. I passwordlock mine cos of the kids,they change ringtones that when your phone starts ringing u won't know it's urs.
ReplyDeleteNowadays,I'm a bit bored with snooping. I snoop once in a while n any number wey shake my head,I don copy am o
This is why I'm marrying a man 20yrs older than I am. By the time i exhaust him in bed, he won't think of another woman again.
ReplyDeleteHehehe...u be real character. Im guessing the man is 65 and above o. Bcoz all this aristos of age 50 still cheat. Infact na their own worse pass
DeleteMy first time commenting on this blog, I know ma fiance's password and he knows mine and I snoop anytym I want to even right beside him. We are getting married this sat and I recently opened a new email he doesn't know abt, i used it to send some msgs 2 him acting as a big ikoyi babe and asking him out cos he works at ikoyi. He replied me by telling me never to send him such msgs In my life and even kald me 2tell him one idiot monkey has been sending him love msgs and he is gonna show me wen we c...am so proud of him and I pray he doesn't change wen we are married...I told him I was d one sending d msgs and he just laughed over it
ReplyDeleteNne oo
DeleteAm just so amazed wen people say men cannot be faithful. Am in a relationship and he gave me his password and he knows mine. I have his ATM pin,and he has mine. The truth is there are faithful men....and they are godly men. you cannot hold a man with beauty,sex,food,intelligence and all that because some other women have it 10x than you would ever have. It's only God that can hold a man. You as a woman need to be sensitive cos the temptation for these men is too much. But you can only be a help meet for a man who is willing to be helped. That brings me to my last point, you give him illegal sex before marriage (premarital sex) and den expect him to be SUDDENLY responsible when you get married. If you don't help him to be self controlled before,its only divine intervention that would help him to be when you're married to him. Be transparent. Courtship is for laying the foundation for a beautiful future,not just banging and preparing for wedding. #notallmencheat. #therearefaithfulmen. if be wnt hold himself now,he may never be able to.
Snooping is a way of life for ladies. If u don't, you will be living in denial and ignoring the realities of life..
ReplyDeleteI once dated a guy and when found out he was cheating, I waited for his bday which was close and got him over 20 packets of condoms. Lol. The way I wrapped it, he tot it was an expensive gift like I usually get.. I told him point blank that if he decides to keep cheating with ( I named all the ladies he was doing) he shld use the condoms on them.. the shock in his eyes dat day, I can never forget.. I just told myself he wasn't for me and ended it.. He begged, cried and even called my sister to beg me.. I told him it was too late that I had moved on.. I no get time for iranu!
Ok now you've snooped, you've discovered his infidelity. What do you do? , you pack out from your home with your two or more kids?, you start fighting everyday and help destroy the marriage? You move on to the next man who is likely not very different? , in todays reality can u afford to train the children you move out with on your own financial and otherwise? , would you prevent the children from having any further interaction with their father? Ok now you have discovered but you don't intend to move out, but then you whole life has been turned upside down, you are constantly depressed, d whole family is tensed, for how long would you live with that? Ok single woman now you've dumped him , so the next man you meet is a saint abi? Or the ones who appear to be saints are yet to make it in life? The questions can go on and on. While I dont sanction men cheating, I feel the issue should center how do you deal with the situation? Nothing ever remains the same in any relationship, some men have realised and come back to fidelity themselves others simply got tired, most may never get back yo fidelity. Finally two things 1) know that no marriage has succeded for 20 years upwards without its period of crisis in various forms. That thing u call successful marriage is a product of patience, wisdom and a whole lot of prayers. 2) its funny when woman act like its only married men that cheat, various women commenting have either cheated themselves , or almost did , or probably have had cause to flirt disgracefully on those same phones that they carry.
ReplyDeleteThe issues of fidelity is neither here nor there, with men it is an issue of a greater percentage. That a man cheats dosent mean he does not love his wife or aint a great husband by all parameters. That may be his major weakness and we all have ours. Women should not be ignorant snoop pls if you have too, but if I may advise think twice on the next steps after you discover anything.
I snoop o but I don't do it all the time cuz most times I can't even be bothered jare. But he is currently away and wen he gets back the snooping will begin from his iPad, he doesn't know how to hide things cuz I av an I don't care attitude to most things as long as he gives me an explanation and I only hide my fone cuz I don't want him to read the messages from my sister that's all. But snoop as the spirit leads o
ReplyDeleteAm all for snooping. Found out my ex had 2 serious babes in his life outside me. What pained me most was the fact that i saw the name of the babe that he said he had nothing on as one of the babe his mum should pray about including my name. Imagine. That guy can lie for Africa
ReplyDeleteThe Kind of advice ladies give here is unbelievable. We form so holy here that one begin to imagine if we all live in Diaspora. Leave Him, Run for your dear life. Run to where? if I may ask. Let the truth be told here, how many Nigerian men are really faithful to a partner, both the married and unmarried once? I would say it again, Who amongst you asking her to run away or leave the man will honestly do like wise? You are crucifying Stella for saying the truth. If you snoop and get what you want, Why then are you seeking for advise. Where has the option for dialogue and second chance gone? Who amongst you here has never double dated in life? Come and form holy Mary here.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, Nigeria men will never stop cheating except the one that has no MONEY. As long as there is money in his pocket, and his dick is working, he will definitely look outside once a while. I work and stay in a male dominated environment, What I see everyday amongst the married and the unmarried Nigerian men. hahaha. Topic for another day.
Dear Poster, Stay with your guy if you truly love him and he loves you too. Its one thing to love someone and its another thing for the person to love you too. speak with your guy, Tell him how bad you felt on what you saw on his phone.Ask the holy spirit to change him. Ladies are not smiling, Just try and be the woman he would be proud of. The next guy might not be better.
I BEG AT THIS TIME TO DIFFER. YES, I AM A MAN, A GOD FEARING MAN MARRIED FOR ALMOST 2 DECADES AND TO THE GLORY OF GOD, I HAVE NEVER CHEATED ON WIFY TALK LESS OF HAVING A RELATIONSHIP WITH ANY WOMAN AFTER MARRIAGE. WIFY HAS FREE ACCESS TO MY PHONE AND INTERNET. IF SHE SPIES MY PHONE MATTERS NOTHING TO ME. GOD SEARCHES THE HEART OF ANY MAN. WITH GOD, THERE ARE NO PASSWORDS; HE WILL CRACK THEM ALL. I'D RATHER BE RIGHT WITH GOD. NOT ALL MEN ARE DOGS.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you sir. Keep it up.
DeleteThat is what we keep consoling ourselves with, if I leave the next might be worse, if she was married it would be a different thing, she isn't, poster get out of that relationship, some men are so bad that they sleep with all the girls on the street, prostitute, house girl, neighbours daughter, etc, a man who is on Badoo and other stupid sites and all he thinks about is sex?
ReplyDeleteJesus, when I look back today I thank God I left my ex, I am with a better person, God will bear me witness, a God fearing man, a man who knows family is everything, a man who has a conscience.
There are men who cheat and deep down they know it is wrong whilst some do not think it is wrong. Marry him if you wish but remember you were warned and you knew him before you married him. Some married men cheat and dare their wives to do her worst. Not all men are marriageable, same applies to women, shine your eye and all the best.
IF i had started snopping years ago i may not have married the man i did he was cheating before we married and i never knew it.got to know that he had been sleeping with an innocent friend afterwards and after the apologies i trusted again didnt start snooping and unfortunately found out that he hadnt stopped,i was completely naive naive!three kids and i started suspecting i started snooping and oh no!to my utter dismay he had/has been cheating not even with people who are worth it and he keeps denying not even remorseful.
ReplyDeleteAnd he is meant to be born again church leader... when he is fasting and all religious i just look at him and i dont know what to say.He doesnt see anything wrong with BADOO,PORN,ect vile sexual iniquities...doesnt see anything wrong with online dating chatting with random girls...rises to the defence of runs girls anytime we discuss,He doesnt let his phone out of his sight and endlessly chatting away doesnt pay me any attention most times especially once he gets home.cant even remember the last time he told me that he loves me...(well he can keep it since it wouldnt even be true if he said it afterall)
And You say one shouldnt snoop? if only i had started earlier if only who knows ? Yes you may say what have i gained right? at least i know what i am up against now.i know what battle i am fighting now spiritually.
Anyway i have been praying bcos thats what i can do.i had toyed with the idea of cheating too but nah! i wont get down to that dirt!
So will keep praying and looking unto JESUS. He has got this covered.yeah!
And none of these 'holy' ladies can say she has NEVER cheated on a guy.
ReplyDeleteits bin a while dt wman who writes abt endometris dropped a comment, hope she is ok, jst tot of her ***kikilove***
ReplyDeleteThere are still lots of God Fearing men out there, and all men are not Dogs he take a Dog to dated or marry a dog
ReplyDeleteWe still have lots of Faithfull and God Fearing men. All men are not Dogs
ReplyDeleteTo the woman with the cheating pastor hubby. I have 2 suggestions that are real life examples (women we are blessed by God).
ReplyDelete1. Print a flyer abi na pamphlet with pastor and the woman and give it to all after offering (you will need all offering for that sunday for ur personal self). Shame them both and destroy the lying man but remember the church will never be the same again and neither will you.
2. Cry to God after a heart to heart conversation with ur hubby about his behaviour. Then fold your hands and look on. No man can fool God forever. Keep praying and be nice to sista choir. Act like nothing happened and the good Lord will vindicate you soon.
I believe you are been shapened for counselling of younger women in marital crisis. Remain faithful, dress nicely, ignore all (not easy) but the grace of God is sufficient when you cry to him.
Infact now when my husband's phone ring I will say Kate is calling you o and carry my eyes off. I love my life!
It's like my girl tokstarr said...if the phone don't gotta lock and you can do it without him knowing, what's holding you back.
ReplyDeleteAbeg, do't mind this stellastical, a woman needs to know what she's getting herself into.
My dear kick his ass to the curb!