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I saw a comment yesterday that I had to turn into a post because it interested me....The mentality of the male child in the society and the stress it puts on the woman...I know and have heard of women under great pressure to birth a male child so that they wont be thrown out of their homes...some even do it risking their lives after the Doc says '' stop making babies''....
Read the culled comment from one of the posts on this blog yesterday.
Stella,pls you need to run a post on Nigeria men and there mentality on the sex of a child.Today is the naming ceremony of one of my friends and her hubby is nowhere to be found!
Reason is;she was delivered of another baby girl after having three already.The most annoying part is that,he left his matrimonial home yesterday vowing never to take part in the upbringing of 'His' girls(4),and didn't come back home.
We called his place of work this morning as his phone wasn't connecting,hmmmmmmmm;we got the shocker of our lives-He had taken One week off and he didn't tell anyone that his wife just had a baby,even his boss was surprised.
My friend is so hysterical now and I fear for her health because all the while she was preggers;the doc always told her to think less.I for one knew she prayed fervently,even fasted for the baby to be a boy,buh alas,with the baby now;she has four girls.
Trust the man/Nigerian men,they would carry there 'ROGER' to find girls who would open there red sea in order to pass through so they could have a male son.All ya men,we know you need a male child who would take after your name,blablabla,but the last time I checked,it is y'all that determine the sex of your child.
Puhleeeeease,stop making women go through the stress and fear of always wishing and thinking of the baby to come out a boy.Respect us oooo!
P..S-When you men pray to God to give you money,also pray to him to give you strength and ability to produce a male child.And una wey dey tell your girlfriends to abort anyhow,It could be the baby boy you need later in life that is being flushed out.Hian!''
Child Is child whether male or female...The earlier some men starts getting used to it the better for them... I even prefer female child to a male because a female child can never abandon his parents at old age....
ReplyDeleteThey are always there for the parents while a male child forgets everything when he has his own family....
Poster,your friend's husband is an illiterate and wicked...
Exactly d man Ȋ̝̊̅ڪ an illeterate. No educated man will do such. Man kor, man ni. I'm not a party to such. Does it even still go an in dis day and time? Whoeva does dat Ȋ̝̊̅ڪ still backward. Any family dat doesn't av a girl child definitely knows d void it has on them. I so luv to av a girl next abeg.
DeleteHmmm......I really don't see d difference between a male and a female child o.....but mehn, people can be mean abt this subject, especially we (the igbo's). My mum gave birth to 4 girls. My dad never had a problem abt it.my dads parents were dead. Ironically, it was my dad's niece that carried the matter like gala for head o.she came visiting when my mum was in labour for d last girl, she maltreated us, tried stealing mums jewellery and all but as small as we were my sisters and I stopped her.my mum came back and sent her out of the house.she didn't even visit my mum in d hospital. A lot of dads relatives gave us trouble over this matter but her was d worst.....fastfoward a couple of years latter, she got married and gave birth and kept giving birth to girls....till she had 2 come 2 our house and beg my mum 2 please pray for her.....(By then my mum had given birth to a son and he's d last child). Mum prayed for her, she took in after a while and gave birth to a son........lolz..this life ehn.
Deletethink someone mentioned it somewhere about you going back to school. Honey,it would do you a lotta good. All the blunders flying out of your mouth can be prevented.. Go back to a finishing school. The Lord is your strength. #nopunintended
DeleteThe husband is an ignorant fool. Pikin na pikin. Human wants are insatiable. Just the other day a male friend said he wants to have all girls so he can use their bride pension......and apparently he's not the only man who has this mindset.
DeleteOld School Marriage Advice- click my name to read more and share your thoughts.
Bia, Linlin, when you and ceecee where fighting in the aduro post, you said you came from a place that girls are not valued that was why your womb gave birth to 3 boys. But now you are sounding sympathetic towards the phlight of women with this problem. @just saying o#
DeleteChildren are gifts from God...male or female. Nigerians and their craze for a particular sex, when will we understand that it dosnt really matter. My cousin got married September 2007, she gave birth to her 5th male child last month and she insists she will keep going till she gets a female baby despite our plea.......crazy, 5 kids under 7yrs all for a gal....Sad! !!!
DeleteThe man is just looking for an excuse to go haywire! He should give her his "X" chromosone to ve a girl! If anyone must get angry,its the wife! She should cuss him for always giving her "Y". Yeye mumu!
DeleteWide eye,d y chromosome is male while X is female.Get ur facts right.plss marry Google. Tnk me lerra
DeleteChizzy
Plsss I need help. I hv 2 girls through C section and I hv juxx one more chance. My next baby has 2 be a boy or am doomed .Dis matter is
Deletemaking my life miserable. its on my neck.All eyes are on me. plsss I need serious advice on how 2 get a baby boy.Aunty stella,plsss I need ur advice too,heard u hv 4 boys.
Desperate mum.
Desperate mum just shut up with your idiotic self.... Go and ask your husband to give I advise since he is the one who gives the male chromosomes.... Foolish woman some people are looking for children u are here talking rubbish..... If u like go and steal a boy.... It's fools like u wok fuel this kind of problem we have here..... Walahi if am God I will give your ungrateful self another girl.... Maybe then u will go and commit sucide.... Oloshi
DeleteAnon 5.17,May God 4giv u. BASTARD of life.All ur generation r deeply cursed.Ezi offia.U wil never ever see good.Ur prayer wil never ever work 4 me.Ur so hurt,maybe ur barren.As ur praying 4 someone not 2 hv a male child may all ur prayers never be answered ijn,amen.Cursed fool.
DeleteSad... When some others are looking for whichever child they cld call theirs!
ReplyDeleteReally? In 2014??? E no get wetin I no go hear o, hia...
ReplyDeleteI can bet he's igbo because Yorubas have the same respect for the female child.
Deletesome men are so unreasonable.so its her fault that she cldnt give birth to a boy. if anyone is to blame,its him cos he is the one responsible for donating the Y chromosome to fuse with the womans X chromosome so i wonder why some men shifts blame to their wives.
ReplyDeletewhen the girls grow up tomorrow and refuse to see their father or even help him,he will take it d other way round .children these days keeps memory of things early in life and i m sure d eldest child child will be nothing less than 5yrs
i pray she has something doing that she can use to cater for the girls.
its not about the gender these days but what they will become tomorrow and its the girl child that usually takes better care of their parents these days.
just pissed off by ds man's attitude
Stella this is so true, especially we the igbo's, not having a male child is like not having a child at all, igbo don't value female children, even in the past female children are not allowed access to education and its appalling, all they tell you is who will bear my name? Who will carry on my legacy? Thank God for civilisation, the female child is appreciated in some quarters this days, but some bigots still have that foolish mentality. God helps us, and help the woman also
ReplyDeleteYour comment will be visible after approval
All these men looking for male child up and down,u'll get wat u're looking for one of these days.a woman in my hood had 8 girls b4 she had her last child which actually turned out 2 be a boy,unfortunately she died after birthing the child and guess wat?d hubby brought in another woman who actually has 2 girls for him now.LMAO.Well as 4 me,I am not married yet but I pray 2 God 4 2 girls and 1 boy,cause d gurl child u despised at the beginning will cater for u wen u're old and dying,I speak from experience.
ReplyDeleteI agree with u + I luv d way stella expressed herself.
DeleteIhekire Tony
ReplyDeleteMale child or female child, no one is better than the other.
Our society makes it seem as if one is more precious than the other. Is the same God that created all of us. Am so busy today, I would have shared an interesting story concerning this topic.
No bible verse today to back ur comment?
DeleteIt is well!
ReplyDeleteHow is it ever the fault of a woman when she continues to birth a particular sex?
Nigerian men and their twisted mentality. ca me rend triste!
Stella if u see the way I took torch light to look for this comment last night Ehen, I just couldn't rest, cos I commented under it and I wanted to see if it got published, and I couldn't find it, I had to go thru all yesterday's post.lol. I have this thing where am restless till I've done something I plan to do.
ReplyDeleteMy take on this issue is ILLITERACY, a man that finished even ss3 that knows his biology well won't try this. Unless he's wicked.
But here's one funny thing o, I've seen cases where the man wants a male child so bad, that the one match he played outside resulted to a Male child, where as Madam at home has 6 girls already.
Hahaha. OCD baby!
DeleteYou can't move on to a new task until you see the end of the old one..lolzzzz....
Am like that too!
People don't understand that is usually the female children that look back and remember their parents most of the time!
I know my folks are proud of me.
I remember how momsie used to be bullied by our relatives(dad's sisters) cos she had just two girls then,now they call me for one ish or the other...haha..this life eh...Echi di ime mehn
Oga after running,don't complain that your girls grew up and abandoned you...useless piece of shit!!!!
Lol! You too? Soo this one is OCD too.. I see.
DeleteMine is getting worse, I would make sure I lock the door before leaving the house, half way down the stairs, I would start getting worried that I didn't lock it, if I don't come back to check I won't be at peace. *smh*
Naija Men especially those in the less civilized areas should be made to follow their wives to antenatal occasionally, a woman give birth in the General hospital and immediately the baby came out before the cord was cut she started stretching her neck to see the Sex of the baby, when she was told it was a girl, this woman broke down and started wailing bitterly, that she's dead, that her husband told her not to bother coming to his house if it's a girl again, and true to his words he got to the hospital saw that it was a girl and right there in the presence of the nurses he started shouting at her and told her to return to her father's house! Wicked man, that child will grow up tomorrow to hate the father and people that don't understand will abuse her.
Mtcheew! People still do this? What most people don't realise is that God gives us what we need, not necessarily what we want.
ReplyDeleteWhat if they have the male child and he ends up a delinquent or something worse. I guess they don't know there are lots of people out there that will almost pay their boys to leave.
Poster, let ur friend take heart and look after her girls, God will bless her and make them d cornerstone.
Click my name for all your celebration cakes and cupcakes, cheers.
Especially igbo men. Even the very poor ones that have no property to be inherited. I knw a lady that her hubby abandoned at the hospital bed(because it's a girl). He left her in asaba, where she has been staying with her rich uncle during her nysc, and went back to PH. To make matters worse,its their first child and she is very pretty with a glowing skin. The guy is a big oil worker in PH. Till today no word from him. The baby is abt 8months or so.
ReplyDeleteVery true. We Igbos place so much value eh. There is this man that attends my church. He has four daughter abi three and a son who happens to be the last child. If you see how unruly this boy is eh, so tey the boy de chop correct beating from im papa well cos once the come to church, the mama will just discharge and leave the boy with his dad. The daughters at tyms follow the mum or if the woman head no correct small she will push all of them to the dad. The man no get option again naa. He always struggles to tame the boy. Lol. Afterall shebi e wan male pikin? E don see am now.
DeleteFirst child? Is the guy normal. Shame on him
DeleteHaving a boy means the woman will inherit her husband wealth.
ReplyDeletePlease, let me welcome you to the year 2014. You're still in 2000 BC.
DeleteSome men are just beasts..ewoo!!! Male child here,male child there..No be wetin you put inside her,she born give you..but remember that"NWANYIBUIFE” you don't know what the future holds for that girl child..Continue running COWARD...
ReplyDeleteAs I always say, it is what u give me that i'll deliver for you.no two ways about it
DeleteFoolish man y won't he create d male child since his life depends on it? Imaqine wat dis poor lady is qoinq throuqh naw bcos of a selfish and inconsiderate person? Kai God u ma can qossip o. U 4 kuma kuma pity dis poor child of urs na? Daz my mom's line! But I personally believe dat Good qives us qift dat will b useful to us n make us happy! What is a male child's worth dat will cause u sorrow in ur life? God help us women and chanqe d mentality of most men concerninq male children! Amen!
ReplyDeleteDiamondblinqz I have missed you!
DeleteThis is the part I duff my hat for my dad. He has 6 of us (5 girls and a boy) despite the fact that he had girls before the boy i've never heard him mention anything that has to do with gender, he even wants his girls to be strong, soldiers! And unlike other homes my only bro doesn't get any special treatments, care, love, whatsoever. Most great men in the world have just female children. Your friend's husband is Ignorant and stupid af. Nonsense!
ReplyDeleteWhy did ur dad continue till he had a boy? Mumu,I must comment. Shows ur dad has the you must birth me a male child mentality. Guess you would have been telling a different story,if the male child didn't come.
Deletehmm stella...I know many men that think like that oooh. Mostly Igbo men. Dey don't realise that some peeps are even begging God for one! That is really bad, and its mostly those that are not very enlightened that behave that way
ReplyDeleteLie! My father is very educated o, yet he went out nd nd got married to another woman bcos my mom has six girls, he married a widow with two kids nd she had 2 boys for him, nd he was taking care of all of them. Long story short, one of d boys started falling sick always nd 1 thing led to another my dad decided to conduct a DNA for both of dem nd found out he was not dia father! Lmao. Funny thing is that I think d he goat has anoda mistress again cos he has started sleeping out again. sounds like a nollywood movie.....i know
DeleteYou are kidding me!
DeleteOoooh Stella, this post just reminded me of how my dad was adviced by his Mum to marry another woman simply bcuz my mum had just given birth to a male child n 5girls.
ReplyDeleteStella, this woman(step mum) attacks us spiritually ever since my dad married her...My dad is so clueless that he doesn't even know who she really is...but I know for sure, Jehovah God will expose her this year.
Men, please do not put ur spouse in so much pains bcuz of male child.always remember Its God that gives children.
dis kain life na wa!
ReplyDeleteU no marry wahala
u marry wahala
u no born pikin wahala
u born pikin wahala
u born girl wahala
u born only boys kuma wahala!
Kai! I tire!
Lord pls bless d sperm of my husband 2 b with male n female zygotes o!
Chai! It is wel!
Blue IvY
You r vry funny.
Deleteds is why i respect my husband o whether boy abi girl all na d same
ReplyDeleteIts quite unfortunate.
ReplyDeleteit takes two to produce a child. why blame it on the woman should a baby girl pop out?
x and y chromosome is not the function of a woman alone. it takes both.
sadly, this male gender over female is a big issue that most tribes do not joke with especially the ibo culture.
Most times its d women puttin pressure on demselves,
ReplyDeleteI wld site a personal ex.
Oh Dear! My coMment is all messed up.
DeleteI love to rewrite dis, but am feeling lazy biko. Can't rewrite dis. Wld read instead.
Stella watsup wit d comments section?
#Namaste#
ReplyDeleteStella thanks for posting this!Asides the there/their ish,I think I composed this write-up well cos' I had a hang-dog when I was composing.
Hmmmmmmm,the naming did hold yesterday but without the father of the baby.His boss sent in some money which we quickly utilized for the naming ceremony;his younger brother stood in as the father of the baby.It was so bad,he didn't tell his friends and none could ascertain his whereabout.All thanks to their pastor,his colleagues at work,his boss,his family members n my friends family members;d ceremony came out successful.Y'all might say the ceremony shouldn't ve held,buh common,children are gift from God and God said in every situation,one must be happy,also,we wanted to prove to him dat without him,life goes on.My friend has planned to stay off her matrimonial home for a while probably travel to U.Swith her kids(her parents supports dis tho!).The only thing I can do now is just to pray for peace to reign in her home,abi?
Mehn! That guy is wicked. How can you desert your own blood like that? God will definitely judge him for this.
DeleteSo some 'learned' men still think like this n this 21st century?...wen me I dey pray for a girl(with oedipus complex) as my 1st child(wen I never know who I wan marry),I don give her names already sef..na wah for some men o
DeletePls let her travel and go easy off she needs it.wicked man
Delete*Sweetness*
@bitchplis oedipus was sleeping with his mother. Olodo. I believe the term you are looking for is, electra complex.
DeleteTravel to the US? That means she has good savings or a good job. If i were in her shoes, I'd shelve the US trip for now, too expensive. She needs to save as much money as she can now to take care of her girls cos her hubby has gone AWOL. She should instead go to her parents place, there she will get people helping with the kids and her baby.
Delete@laura,I'l not argue wit u....tanx for calling me olodo,u shldv added 'dolo n itibolibo'...na so dem dey correct u?I pity ur kids(present or future)
Delete@Laura u made me lol,@bitchpills over sabi is too much
Deletemen...nawa ooh..why does they act that way! wicked people
ReplyDeleteDoes they act that way?u should spend more time with brighter grammar than u do on sdks blog..mscheeew
DeleteUr grammer sounds like real poopoo! Tufiakwa. 'Why does they' I mean who speaks that? Adontbelieve this! Not even my 5yrs son. Choi!!!
DeleteChoi!
DeleteSee name!!!!!!!!
Ur grammar is shit tho
One thing I know is this, That God is d giver of children....be it a boy or a girl.As Stella as said is what u give her datz wat she will definitely produced dere is no magic to it....pls d woman should Takia n be strong for her kids, d stone d builders rejected shall one day be d chief cornerstone...Wu knows she might grow up to effect change our dear Nation has be craving for.
ReplyDeleteSome have food but cannot eat, some can eat but have no food...#singing#
Delete*Isn't it obvious that the man is a werey??? Ungrateful retard who can't even draw a human being not to talk of creating one.
Does he know when and how a woman gets pregnant?
Does he know how many people out there crying to God for the fruit of the womb, even if it is one, a girl that they will be forever indebted?
Does he know what these girls will be in the nearest future?
Does he know that Prof Dora Akunyili(Blessed Memory) was born as a girl and not a boy?
Does he know that Stella Dimoko-korkus came into this world same way as a girl and not a boy?
Does he know that the leader of boko haram and his cohorts were born by desperate men like him who now wishes they were girls and not boys?
Does he know that the society ain't good today is because of men like him?
Somebody please tell me what and what this man knows and the ones he doesn't know so i can know where to come in from#Nonsense #GlorifiedLiterate
I keep saying it, everyone can be a father, but not all can be called daddy.
I Miss you more now my Dearest Daddy of life!!!
Nice one as usual my brother, trust you are good my dear zizee?
#YourLegacyLivesOnProfDoraAkunyili*7/6/14
*Prayer For Nigeria in Distress x10 Daily*
Very wel@bouncer..u said it all some get cap without head n y some gat head without cap....me feel for d poor woman going thru d torture she didn't bargain for.
DeleteIt is not his fault, some families are praying desperately for the fruit of the womb, the sex of the child is the least of their worries.Some women never made it out of the labour room so I really don't blame him, devilish man.
ReplyDeleteAt the end of the day if these 4 girls become very successful in life, he will want to be a part of their lives by fire by force and people will start preaching forgiveness, pathetic weak man.
I think its natural for men to think like that esp we africans,though some over react jst like ur friend s husband. I am preggy now and i already have 2girls and i v been praying and telling God to pls bless me wt a baby boy. Not cos hub wl run away or do something bad but cos its natural dt we try to balance it. My own is dt its natural jst dt some pple over react.
ReplyDeleteBy d way oo,how does a man determine d sex of a baby.i tot it we d female. Tot they said that if u hv sex on d day of ur ovulation,u wl v a baby boy. Pls someone lecture itibolibo like me on how d men determines d sex of there baby.
Lol. Since u don call yasef itibolibo lemme do u d honour #lol# a woman has two x chromosomes, while a man haas 1x and 1y. X being female, and Y being for male. One of his chromosomes is required for fertilization, in addition to one of d woman's own. If his x jams d woman's x, then it's a girl. XX. But if his Y is active enough to jam d woman's own X, then it's XY which is a boy. I no too go school, but hope my explanation has helped.
DeleteWomen have the X while men have the X and Y. X is for girls and Y for a boy
DeleteNow the Y is a fast swimmer and dies of on time while the X is a low swimmer and last longer.. The X can last up to 5days while the Y can not last up to 72hrs.. That's why its advisable to sleep with your hubby on the day of your ovulation or a day before your ovulation so that the Y can get to it fast before it dies off..
That's the little I can explain,doctors help out
Your the problem this society has!
Delete@madam Iphie, 'you are' or 'you're' and never 'your...'. All u would hv done was to lecture her as she had asked not showing yourself.
DeleteHmmmm
ReplyDeleteStupid idiotic foolish man.... She should leave the fool and move on with her life....no man is worth this headache
ReplyDeleteG mama had 3 girls.When she gv birth to the 3girl the hub left the hosp when he heard it was a girl. He contributed little or nothing to there upkeep and education. d sec girl chinwe,graduated wt 1st class in pharmacy2011set frm oau.Fast forward,dy are happily married to mega rich hus and are doing well. D last daughter jst wedded last 2 wks. D dad now goes around telling pple of how his daughters had made him proud.
ReplyDeleteD guy disapperd? Dis is serious..if i were to b d wife dat is d end of d marriage...wat rubbish...is it not wat he deposited in her dat she brought out...children are gift nd dere shouldnt b any discrimination
ReplyDeletejust like my uncle dat has dis male children mantality cos is wife didnt give him a male child he has decided to take a new wife.......einen schlecter Mann
I pity that man. He will be so surprised that the rejected daughter will be the corner daughter at the end.
ReplyDeleteGbam my sweetheart...
DeleteThe hubby is still a boy not a man. His Boss should screen his certificate to ascertain if actually he went to school cos he should have known by now that his child's sex is determined by him.
ReplyDeleteCouples are praying and fasting for God to bless them with just a child be it girl or boy, all he does is to run away from his own blessings.
what God will judge in this life eh!!!
Male child mentality,what a man can do,a woman can do better...there's God oo
ReplyDelete@poopoo-shit-igbe-nshi, did you study grammar at all in primary school? Olodo! It is 'why do' and not 'why does'. Thank me now.
ReplyDeleteThis actually brot fresh tears to my eyes...I almost lost my sis 2012/2013 bcos of this. She has 4 girls (angels) now.
ReplyDeleteAnd the thing is no one was directly pressuring her...her husband is a pastor n doesnt really mind...altho his family na isale-eko them and u knw al d gossips dt wld av been flying around
Her problem came from worrying abt having 3 girls...nt wanting anymore child...goin on contraceptives only to find out she was 3months pregnant...
Den she started prayin, fastng n wishin...she dint want to check d sex of the baby. She later found out at 7 months its was another girl.
Na der trouble start o...she started aving very vague symptoms....requiring admission evry other nyt only to be well by morning...we went thru alot..
As a doctor...even me I cldnt explain her symptoms...we did all possible tests...from brain CT, to total body scans, to Echo, ECG, blood tests, thyroid screens, holter monitoring, EEG, wat did we nt do. She saw a cardiologist, gynaecologist, neurologist, etc...I spent so much money...so many times she just bcoms stiff while talkin to u...den starts to have very fast heart rate, goes cold, have tummy troubles...loses all her strength and unable to stand at all...we carry her to the hopsital sometimes at 3 am leaving only d small girls at home...and by morning she is all fine and ready togo home.
After a while we tot it cld be panic attacks or anxiety disorders...we stopped all the barage of meds she was on before..tried her on some relaxant for a few weeks...and talk her thru her symptoms bein psychological...gave her all d other support she needed and over the course of 12 months her symptoms settled. We wld av lost her if not for God...I rmbr visitin naija wen her symptoms bcam really bad n everyo e feared for d worst...I rmbr sleepin on the hospital bench every night...I rmbr packin my bag of dirty clothes like dat back to the UK, I rmrb running into Prophet samson at the airport and running to him in tears askin for prayers for my sister (I cld neva have done dis cos I believe so much in personal prayers to God)...I rmbr crying all thru my 6 hrs flight back to the UK. .
But I bless God now
She stl doesnt think havin a 4th baby girl was d cause of her symptoms...she says she was neva dt worried...bt we all knw the mind is ones greatest asset...d moment u loose it, dts d end...even u myt nt knw u av lost it
Sorry for all d rants
Atleast I be anonymous, am allowed to.
OP tell ur friend nt to be worried...she shld get more of his family ppl on her side who wld be able to talk to him.
She needs to love her kids cos ders nothing like growing up wt rejection.
For now...she shld calm down or else she myt end up in yaba left o.
.
Anonymous thank God for your sister, I really wish u would come back and see this.
DeleteI remember you, some months back I posted anonymously in the comment section about my mum and I mentioned almost all the symptoms your sister had, you were among those kind enough to reply me and give advice, you won't understand how much your comments helped me and my mum, when I told her someone replied me, she was like "God bless that person, so fast?" lol.. if you've seenn challenges and storms you would understand how a single "it is well" said will care can go a long way, I felt better that day, we did all the scans and Test, MRI and the rest, Nothing! I didn't even know if should be relieved or not,
Well she's still not too strong, but she will live, we now think all the hotness and weakness, chills(yeah she gets so hot, that she get chills, me I don't even understand) blurry vision, are exaggerated display of Menopausal symptoms, prolly because she was on hormone therapy just before her 2nd failed IVF in 2012, she lost the pregnancy at 22wks( quadruplets! At her age they didn't stand much chance), she has accepted the situation as it is, but we still hoping for the best. God bless you
Sometin told me to come back andread this ...and der u go
DeleteI do rmbr that post...thank God for ur mum.
Yeah, her symptoms myt be pre-menopausal...all she needs at this stage is rest n peace of mind.
Seriously d societal pressures on us in naija is too much...ders more to live than male/female kids.
I wish u n ur mum all the best...if she really wants a male child to pour her love on...it doesnt av to be her biological child.
A cousins child, a little boy in church...a little boy at d orphanage...
Before she knows it...it wl feel very much like hers...
Bt if its bcos of culture or pressures frm ur dad...its not worth it...all d best dearie.
Why should she get someone to help her talk to the guy? This kind of idiots should be left alone.... We pamper men in Africa too much and make them feel indispensable..... He is the one who needs to come and beg the wife and apologise.... Stupid goat
DeleteGreat testimony you just share
DeleteThank God for your sister
Abi na no man should blame his wife for that it's what u pour in there she'll birth so stop it it's u that determines the sex of the child
ReplyDeleteHello awayu
ReplyDeleteNigeria men and their stupid mentality for a male child. Cant deal biko!
ReplyDeleteForgetting that its the girl child that takes care of their parents when they are old.
Reason i cant stand african men sometimes.
a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said...
ReplyDelete.
If yu want a male child, well thats simple.... Go to a doctor and he will direct yu on the time to have sex or better still outward fertilization could help and thats quaranteed.... Seriously with the way nigeria is a male child needs to be in the family but in abroad is not a must due to their life style.......
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***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***
Buzz off with your childish comments.... What way is Nigeria? If u have only girls then divorce your wife abi? Grow up and change your thought pattern
DeleteHmmm, I can relate to this post. In my house, my mum had six daughters and two boys. And all the girls came before the boys. Actually, I preceded the two boys. So you can imagine what she faced, but the irony of the whole thing was that it wasn't from her MIL or my dad(God rest his soul) but from her co-wife oh. (My aunty ie married to my dad's brother ). She kept on taunting my mum that she keeps birthing girls. And funny, she was having boys. (Seven straight boys). To the point that she told my mum that all her daughters put together are not equal to a son. She used a proverb dat translates to this. Do you know that all her sons as they are now are nothing to write home about. While my own side thrives. Scattered in diff parts of the world. While hers her struggling to make ends meet. Even my dad used to tell her to take it easy then.
ReplyDeleteAfrican mentality. My husband told me his first child must be a male, he stopped me from buying any female cloth during my pregnancy. I actually gave birth to a male child, but I am no wiser as to what would have happened if I I had a baby girl.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend who has had 3 cs for her three kids but she's still talks about getting pregnant soon because of pressure from her inlaws..
You better warn her make she no kill herself. If she kill herself in trying to birth a boy, the husband marry someone else who will maltreat the boy
DeleteAtimes d women are the ones putting pressure on themselves. We dnt have a male child in my home, my mum had to bury six boys n they die immidiately or after few hours they are born, no medical dormity or whatsoever, it was late before we found dt it was jazz induced. But one thing dt makes me happy is dt my dad v never for once blamed my mum or trying to stirr trouble rather he is the one dt always try to calm my mum down. My mum v gone all lenght to have a bb even if it means adopting to the extent of being duped last exmas in her quest to get a male child. We all v warned her to stop wotever she is doing n face the little family God gave her but I still v a feeling she won't stop. I cnt really explain y she cnt rest about the issue of male child as if having one is a free ticket to heaven.
ReplyDeleteWow!!...
DeleteWow!!...
DeleteMy sister has five daughters and a son. All the girls came before the boy. At one time my BIL did not go and visit her in the hospital when she put to bed and he heard it was a girl. Now she has a boy, monkey works, bullshit talks. Lol. If she says 'jump' he will ask how high sef.
ReplyDeleteChild is child weda boy or girl...d goodluck u men tink am male child will bring u is d same a female child will...i was talkn yo someone today nd he said he has two boys nd wish hz wife culd gv him a grl reasons dat he nid a female child cos dey tend to b closer to deir fathers dan d male..dat he wished hz two boys were grls..i know ov cos who wish their first child should b a girl if possible all girls..
ReplyDeleteI fink its we ladies dat rily nid d male kids for companion dats if our hubbys misbehave jst to get bk at dem..buh we not complaining y shuld men complain? The posters frnd shuld jst look for smetn to du so as to earn money to take care of her grls joo..
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Na so my dad's friend had 7 daughter from the wife. The man vex, e go knack outside and had another girl. E still vex, left that other woman, went out again, knack again and had a boy. E body sweet am, e go knack again born girl. Na im e rest. Fear to knack out girls again made him stay put. His relations kept on taunting him that he was a weak man as he could not produce plenty sons. Smh.
ReplyDeleteLol. This story made me laugh.
DeleteGood for him.... I will never put my self thru any stress for a man..... God forbid.... We are havin only 4 kids by Gods grace, am pregnant with twins now as the first.... Anyone God gives me am greatfull.... If all 4 turn out girls and hubby does not like it the door is opened to vamoose..don't have time for male drama abeg
DeleteHe should 've gathered money & go 4 ivf. Why put ur wife through that horrific experience & abandon her & ur poor innocent baby. As far as i know, girls can do even better, u only need 2 train them, good education inclusive. Mind u, it's not d woman's fault, so don't bother going 4 another woman cos u'll end up with same thing.
ReplyDeleteMy mum had 5 girls and 2 boys. The first 4 are girls. My dad neva bothered about that. My father's brothers kept taunting him, dey even asked him to marry a second wife that will give him a son. My father was like "what's the guarantee that the second wife will give me a son". He ignored them. Today, my uncles sons are all useless. All of dem are just wasting around doing nothing while my sisters and i are all doing very well and in our husbands houses. My older sister's husband even surprised us all last month. He bought my dad a brand new prado jeep as a bday gift. His brothers are now begging us to help their sons out with money so that they can become useful. I tried doing that only for the boy to waste the money in less than 3 months. The sex of a baby is not important. What matters is their upbringing and what they become in future.
ReplyDeleteInspirational story. Happy for you guys
DeleteGod bless bless bless my husband,he doesn't care if I give him a boy or a gal,. Some men can give hbp for africa no b small. If God blesses me with a son,I will b hapy nd if he blesses me with a gal I will b happy d important tin is been alive to see my children grow up to be sucessful. I remember some of my relations den laughed at my mum saying she is staanding with one leg cos we are 4girls and a boy. Thank God for my father(God bless him) he doesn't hve time for such talks and doesn't entertain such. To the extent some landlords near my house(benin) called my dad nd advised him to take in(marrry) a benin gal who will bore him sons cos dy now see him as one of dem since he has lived in benin over 30yrs and also established a name there too. My dad warned dem ehn even told my mum,u no women nd dia wahala,she immediately changed her pattern of greeting. Till date dy call my dad "AFRICAN MAN WEY DEY BEHAVE LIKE ENGLISH MAN". Who send mad man?
ReplyDeleteOh pulizz....who is supposed to produce the Y chromosome??....people perish for lack of knowledge...
ReplyDeleteStella i LOVE this post! When it come's to that Nigerian men are sooooooo STUPID! ( most ) I know of women who have gone out and brought bastard sons because of this STUPID men, and during naming ceremony you see them smiling like roasted goat head. lol . I don't know why they put so much pressure on the poor women. IF ONLY THEY WILL BE BOLD ENOUGH TO DO DNA! lol. Dear men this has to stop! Thank you.
ReplyDeleteCan a guy say most Nigeria women are stupid with out u ladies here tongue lashing d person? If most are stupid ur father fall's into the stupid catergory. Asshole
DeleteMost Nigerianen are stupid and randy... Yes your father and mine inclusive.. I don't blame the men it's we women who allow u people to behave like Gods.... If this woman that idiotic husband is one for good..... Men think they are all that... Bullshit
DeleteDear men just make sure you give your girls good education and you will see that there is no difference. Children are children ( i have both tho.) Before you men start stressing your wives please answer this question, will you rather bring up another man's son as yours????…Una too mumu.
ReplyDeleteso wicked of that man. How many boys does Obama has? many couple are praying for one child.
ReplyDeletemy former boss has been married for 10yrs and praying for one. even turned pastor sef. few months now the man has changed. he wants to get it anyhow. meeting young girls and sleeping with them. the madam for house never see her husband for months and she no dey look for him. they only talk for phone and he sends money to her.
men and their wahala.
ReplyDeleteDat was how 1 man left his wife @ the hospital saying she born convent
AND the other left his wife cos she had just boys saying whether he is the one that will always go to pay bride price, dat he needs a girl dat will bring bride price to him too.
funny thing no matter how educated the claim to be there is always that backwardness in them when it comes to sex of a child
Yimu ! na today?
ReplyDeleteNa so Mrs Karma da Byatch paid
my papa a sudden visit when he wanted to bring in his Wo-wo, bcos
he or better still THEY thot'
(as i no know who n who dey behind d i-wan-a-male-child coup d'etat) my mum would never bear him male kids after just 2 girls.
The same week wey oga @ d top(my papa) wan go pay "bribe" price, ws same week bride-to-be enter grave sharp sharp~~ NA DIE BE DAT
Trust husband people, na so dem pack go native doc. since they believed wit every fibre of dia beings lol dat my mum had a hand in her death. As dem pack go juju man house na so dem dissappointly pack come bak. It's been 20yrs or more dem nefa find who kill her? yimu!
Papa sef dem close leg enter room lol!
Poor woman & an innocent B/G smh.
Oga abandonER, diaris godooo!
Remeber, dat child never begged/askd to be born (a girl)
Mtcheww!
Anon 2.14 your comment brought tears to my eyes. It's so unfortunate that your friend's husband had to do that. He should go and beg God for forgiveness, and beg that baby too. Chljdren are like angels.
ReplyDeleteNa wa o I remember my grandad refused to put my mum and her 3 sisters through school because they are girls. My granma had 4girls 2boys. One of my uncles is dead and his life was upside down throughout he never ever had a stable job it was one accident after the other. My other uncle is a pharmacist but he only made something of himself because my mums sister took him in and monitored him very well in school so that he doesn't end up like the other brother.
ReplyDeleteI am now pregnant and I'm a avin a boy but my hubby's family don't care and they treat me like shit. My hubby also left me all by myself at this rate il be going to the hospital and giving birth alone.
Sorry dear, God will vindicate you. Just be strong
DeleteBe strong have your baby and leave his sorry arse... Marriage is not a ticket to heaven, we women take a lot of shit just to please a man that's why they misbehave
DeleteThank you anons for the encouragement, my baby is due anytime now. I'm all alone with no friends or familys but I know God will see me through.
DeleteStella please tell this lady to advise her friend to take a chilled bottle of coke and cross her legs in front of a good channel on her television and rest. my mum had eight of us, six girls and two boys, but i tell you this for free, the world saw she had boys but they are both gone. myself and my five sisters are doing very very good and my uncle with eight children 7guys and a girl till his death wished he had all 7girls and a boy if possible no guy at all bcos his sons all abandoned him when he lost his wife and it was just the girl that was asking after him while the guys were all sending cash as if that was he needed.
ReplyDeleteTrust me when i say low self esteemed guys think that way. she shouldn't even blink over that less of a man guy.
These men are illiterates. I am no Doctor o but doesn't the man determine the sex of the baby? Well, if you keep dropping the "wrong" chromosome and giving your wife a girl, why are you blaming the woman and not yourself? There are people begging God for a child day in day out but some idiot will have 3HEALTHY daughters and act like God owes him something.
ReplyDeleteSome one I know has 4 sons and desperately want a girl. This life sef. We all lack contentment.
ReplyDeleteMadam,
ReplyDeletePlease be happy with the beautiful girls God gave you. Take good care of them, give them good education. I promise you, this man will regret his action one day. Smile God loves you, that is why He has given you those beauties. Rose
@chicrystal - what has IVF got to do with this matter? The story is not that she CANNOT have children, it is that she keeps having girls. IVF is not used for gender selection though I have heard that people can do that, it is very expensive and not very popular because of the ethics issue.
ReplyDeleteIf I hear! All these men. Unfortunately, it is our igbo men that act like they can not read book to understand the way these things work. Aside the men, you hear silly comments from women as well. Imagine a woman asking me when I will pop out a boy , I said after you pop out a child (I know it was evil to say but she was trying to be mean and I gave her one back...Lord I am sorry). Any child is a blessing.
ReplyDeleteSee what I am saying...that Currently in Jupiter guy even affirmed it, he said in Naija you need a son. FOR WHAT??? How many families do you see the married daughters hustling for their parents...a lot! A man marries, gets his family and off he goes, unless his mother is one of those overbearing MILs like mine. A woman will always carry her family along.
if in this 2014 someone is more worried bout the sex of a child than boko haram then that fellow needs to a room in yaba left, the world has gone past all that.. in some years to come we may even have a female president, these days there is no limit to the achievement of women and someone is insisting on birthing a boy, hope he doesnt birth the next Osama bin laden. .Goodluck
ReplyDeleteHmmm.....we are 4 gals n 1 boy in my family....my father always say his gals are his best assets. ...my brother is doing well to the glory of God. My youngest uncle n I have this animosity towards each other, or more like I have towards him cus I was told he came to see my mum at d hospital after she gave birth to me, a nurse, thinking he was my dad told him 'your wife had a baby gal' and right there he turned back n walked away...the nurse went to tell my mum, who was so sad n started crying till my dad came n he said my uncle already told him....and dey figured out he was d one dat came n left...since I heard d story, I always have an 'ish' towards him
ReplyDeleteHe had 3 boys, no gals....the other day at my parents last child's wedding, he could hold it...all my uncles were saying how proud dey are of us....we said its all abt God...im grateful to God for vindicating my mum, making her the envy of the family.....I pray for more grace to take good care of dem......make I go hustle for my own contribution for their summer flight fare.....see life, I no go summer, na my parents dey fly around d world....note to my children
@sprinklingeyez, wetin person no go see!!!!
ReplyDeleteonly boyz, na wahala
only gehs, same wahala na ni
we are sooooooo insatiable!!! this man na olojukokoro. After the gehs don turn better persons, he will be boost that 'she is my daughter!directly from my loins'.
issssssshhhh!!!
Lol. I hvv 4boys. I dey find girl
ReplyDeleteI had daughters first and all my In-laws including my husband brought tears to my eyes because of their attitude and comments.
ReplyDeleteGod blessed me later with boys. As for one of my in-laws he has daughters only and his wife is yet to get pregnant and from his comments, he is not happy.
The truth is that every woman WISH to have both sexes. The irony is that some are praying to have any child gender as long as they have who to call them mummy. God always vindicate the innocent women that are treated shabbily because of their daughters. Any woman that comes out of the delivery room in good health, should be eternally grateful to God.