Ms XYZ started off telling her story but from most comments here,she felt people judged her and some even said she was writing a novel.....''no one understand how rapes feels unless they are wearing the shoes''.
She came out of a closet to tell her story but has decided to end it because she got discouraged by the comments and doubt and people judging her and asking why she went back to her rapists.
Let me assure you that this story was not made up,i know Ms XYZ and after a long talk with her i saw the reason why she wanted to close it.
She was going to reveal her identity at the end of her rape story and i am sure people would have fainted knowing who she is but......
She has found some sort of healing though and i pray God perfects the good work.
She closes her story with....
''I realise some people may read my story and doubt, question and ponder on the genuineness of it. Sometimes I think back and remember my past and even I am amazed by some of it.
I am amazed that I was able to resist suicide! But my question to you is what do I stand to gain by making up a story? People ask why she went back to the specialist. Why didn’t she scream? Some even say if it was them this will never happen?
I say a big Amen to that because I do not wish my life experience on even my worst enemy, However until you have walked in my shoes you can never know where it hurts, until you find yourself in the same situation I was you cannot say with 100% certainty that you know what you would have done if it was you.
I must say I am glad that many ladies have also shared their story here as a result of reading mine, except you have walked in my shoes you cannot understand fully……So I am happy more girls are opening up and hopefully together we can put an end to child abuse, sexual abuse and rape.
I do not want to bore you with the details of my life, however after being raped a second time in University and narrowly escaping the same from an extended family member, a different version of me was born, an angry one, resentful with a deep hatred for men.
This took me down a path that today when I look back I wish I hadn’t because I missed out on love because all I focused on was the pain men had caused me.
It took me a few years to realise I cannot punish every man I meet for the sins of a few in the past, my advice to rape victims is simple….
Never bottle it up, discuss the event with at least one person or the silence will eat you up and one day you wake up an angry bitter woman.
Do not make the new man that comes into your life a surrogate for the ones that tried to ruin it
You have to love yourself first before you can accept love from someone else
Do not feel ashamed because you were raped, I spent many years of my life ashamed, it affected my self-esteem, my confidence and pride as a woman
And Above all always pray because God is the ultimate healer at the end of the day……..he forgives our sins and makes us whole again. God does not care about your past he cares about what you plan to do with your future
These are my life lessons, these are what I have realised today, I look back on my story and I see the positives in all the negatives it has made me a stronger, determined and focused person.
I have my life back, my career, my education and above all God in my life, I am still healing the fact is to forgive is easy to forget is almost impossible because I do not have amnesia.
They say time heals all wounds but the scars are forever……
This story was not shared to generate pity from anyone but to inspire ladies out there to speak out and together we can fight against rape.
it happened years ago to me and it took me years to be able to open up about it, it shouldn’t have taken me so long but we live in a society where you are judged before your story is even told.
God bless you all and thank you for taking time out to read my story''.
You can read her story here
DIARY OF A RAPED ANGRY WOMAN - THE RAPE
DIARY OF A RAPED ANGRY WOMAN - WHO IS TO BLAME?
DIARY OF A RAPED ANGRY WOMAN- WHOSE BABY AM I CARRYING?
On behalf of Sdkers, I apologise. For the nasty comments some people gave, for the unbelief, I apologise. I pray u find complete healing.
ReplyDeleteWell said but so far the deed was not recorded I think she should forget and move on. Anyways, can I suck Dick with condom, saw sum rashes on my new boyfriends Dick ?
DeleteSpeak for yourself @anon, she trivialized the story herself.reply me and drop dead
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteI pray u find peace poster. EVE E UME
DeleteNigerians are so quick to Judge; they never see things in a positive side that why we are heading the wrong direction. We hope to change, but the change must start from you and I first.
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, I thank God for your life that you have overcome the anger, bitterness and hatred you have for men....May GOD heal you completely in Jesus Name and I pray that you find a man that will appreciate you, love you and care for you soonest.
#bringourgirlsback the matter continues
Nonsensical story
ReplyDeleteU are very stupid
DeleteWas that neccessary?
DeleteFoolisitical post 4rm u Annon! Anofia!
DeleteFoolisitical post 4rm u Annon! Anofia!
DeleteAnd you, nonsensical nonentity!!! Gerrout joor!!!
DeleteU shall be raped soon nd u shall go tru all dis woman has gone tru,,,den u will learn to close ur gutter maggot mouth!!!
DeleteOKIJA WIFE
Ok I pray same for u, then u would. Understand what she went thru and is still going thru. I got abused as a kid of 8. And it took me almost 24yrs to forgive and let go. Dear poster it is well with u and may the good Lord continue to refine and heal u completely
DeleteAwww...Mrs XYZ.
ReplyDeleteGod is your ultimate healer and HE only has a supportive shoulder you can lean on.
Forget man. Forget world people. We are all nothing but jugdgemental lots.
Some people open their mouth to spew rubbish not thinking for a minute, the pain the writer went through and the grace to summon courage to speak out.
Who no go, nor know sha.
It is well with you sweetheart. I wish I could see you and give you a very tight and warm embrace.
#hugs+love
This bloglord can pretend for africa.useless child min(d) er
DeleteBloglord Press your IGNORE THE ANONYMOUS MONKEY button now!
DeleteKikikikiki.
May the good Lord perfect your healing ma,Amen.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you have moved on.
God bless you.
Eeyah
ReplyDeleteAbeg ooh! This story never do???
ReplyDeleteOya poster, when is this novel coming out?
IAMMEEEEEEEEEE
Asin eh! D story tire me.. #yawnnn
DeleteU r a very foolish human being
DeleteIf u hear very very please don't conclude bcos u don't know if it is very good or very bad. I really hope that someone will believe ur own story when u tell it. I just pray No one will call it a novel. Peace be with u
DeleteNo mind the jobless writer mseww
DeleteD novel will b out, wen a fool lyk chyynscillah kan read n understand!
DeleteYou must be very insensitive for this your stupid talk, if u don't have anything encouraging to say can't u just read and look the other way?
DeleteYerk!
You could have skipped the post rather than open it and write rubbish.
DeleteSee dis dis ashewoo kobo olobo sufe!! Agbero don kukuma rape all ur destiny commot finish! Beast!!!
DeleteOKIJA WIFE
2tink dat ur a lady n u spk of rape lyk ur a male rapist. I pray u neva experience dis. Rape s nt a tin of pride n I alwaz endeavour 2read such storiz cos iv xperiencd t. It was d grace of God I was able 2 4giv d guy involved hre n I neva did punish anoda man 4wat a useless guy did. Pple r diff n view tins differently. So 4dfact dat I cld 4give n moved on dos nt mean sum1 else ll do same. So u beta tink several tymz b4 u spil dis rubbish datz in ur mouth.
DeleteRAPE is hard....people can never understand till they experience it which we pray no one does.
ReplyDeleteplease keep being the strong lady you are and i hope some few positive comments assure you that YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
all the best.
Yes I agree.. Rape is very hard! Please guys, I need your advice. My fiancee cheated twice, just recently he confessed and accepted christ. Do I forgive or just move on. C. A
DeleteWe sympathised with you ah ah ah stella biko I didn't see any comment from anyone blaming her
ReplyDeleteI take it that you didn't see eze wanyis comment.
DeleteYimu
Delete@ashawo, thunder fire u there idiot.
DeleteI am going for my usual weekend getaway, cruise tins#plane tins#.
@poster, may u find closure in Jesus name.
Enjoyment tins#
Bye...
Take sorry....
ReplyDeleteWe Nigerians have lost our consciences n sympathy that we see ur case as that of self mental slavery n torture.
You alone can cleanse your heart n purge ur mind of evil.
Let's focus on Nigeria n Chibok adoption you hear?
Your story telling is wrongly timed cos we presently face more challenges.
Btw,is your blog name Wide eyed?
Adoption???Who are you adopting???You think you know it all right?? Or you mean Abduction??
DeleteSo you want to know if its smone you know so that you will laugh??
Dear Poster,i still maintain I can never know or imagine what you went through...But am happy your healing....God bless you sister!
It's Abduction ma'm
DeleteStella I think you should be blame for the closure of her story because you knew the story is true, why did you enable Eze wayi's and some other mean comments? If you like don't post.
ReplyDeletePoster am victim of child abuse, I totally understand how you feel. Thanks for sharing your story because me I can't and won't. Because I don't need abuse from sdkers.
God bless you.
My name can sweet u people sha.....
DeletePls be strong for our good God will heal you totally.
DeleteDont I know you @ anon 9; 57? Smh
DeleteIts gd u wrote ur story and u are healing. Your healing will be permanent in Jesus name. Have bn raped before and each time i was to have sex i will cry. Even when i got married but have healed.Thank God because u have used ur story to help others heal.
ReplyDeleteThe Lord is your strength
ReplyDeleteIts such a pity that what Nigerians are best at is judging others(please study the book of Matthews very well).. Thank God I never tried to judge the poster or doubt her story at all cos as she said, you will never understand until you walk in her shoes. Madam poster God bless you for sharing your story and I pray that he continues to heal you as you try to Live your life. I am proud of you, you are a strong woman and like you said, God doesnt care about your past but about ur NOW and your future. You are not alone and God loves you so much, you are his masterpiece. Stay blessed... and as for sdkers that wanna cuss me out for saying the truth, guess what? Knock yourself out lolz
ReplyDeleteWhy do you think the writer is Wide-eyed? Amongst all blog visitors, na only her you single out.
ReplyDeleteYou better go back to bed or rather put your baby to breast and stop asking silly questions.
Dear poster the Lord is your strength.
ReplyDeleteI'm too sad today to empathize with u.
ReplyDeletePoster, it is well with your soul. Do not concern yourself with the negative comments. The important thing is that you've come out of this with your life and sanity intact.
ReplyDeleteGod has a lot more in store for you. Keep ur head up. #hugs
*judgemental
ReplyDeletewho is dis son of belial dat called dis woman's experience nonsensical??? Ala kpochie gu nti! Eghu!!! U will taste rape soon.
ReplyDeleteOh dear! Short of words, please let's be soft on sensitive issues as this. Very few people have tough skin, quite a number of people have committed suicide as a result of social/media comments.
ReplyDeleteBe strong woman, God will make you happy.
Same XYZ that cursed my beloved Wide Eyed out on Kema Chikwe's thread on April 30th?
ReplyDeletePtifff!
She is also judgemental, uncouth and narrow minded.
Spare us your holy-no-body-believe-me-cry.
You do worse to people.
Bite me!
@ poster;that's just how most people see things..some are fast to come to a conclusion even before the end of the story..on behalf of Sdk readers;I apologise and urge u to move on and be stronger than ur current self in as much as I know u ve moved on soo far..wish u all d best!!
ReplyDeletePeople are very very wicked and extremely judgemental in this part of our world. Please pay no iota of attention to any negativity here. God bless you as you heal completely.
ReplyDeleteAeegurl...
Stay strong Ms xyz. The lord will heal u completely. VISIT MY WEBSITE @www.beautycribtv.com
ReplyDeleteWhat if the girls kidnapped from chibok are facing the same maltreatment?
ReplyDelete#BringBackOurGirls
@iMannie_
Typical Nigerian attitude: judge and bring down your neighbour.
ReplyDeletePoster, I sincerely feel your pain but I can assure you that having read all the comments on your earlier posts, the percentage of SDKers that were negative were actually very low and negligible and do not really represent the thoughts of the greater majority. I think you are brave to come out with your story. I doff my hat to others that have shared similar stories of their life's experiences on this blog; I hope you all find closure. It is because of stories like yours and the comments that follow from real people that make me keep coming back to SDK. Poster no vex ehn. Dooh!
ReplyDeletePoster, I sincerely feel your pain but I can assure you that having read all the comments on your earlier posts, the percentage of SDKers that were negative were actually very low and negligible and do not really represent the thoughts of the greater majority. I think you are brave to come out with your story. I doff my hat to others that have shared similar stories of their life's experiences on this blog; I hope you all find closure. It is because of stories like yours and the comments that follow from real people that make me keep coming back to SDK. Poster no vex ehn. Dooh!
ReplyDeletePele Poster
ReplyDeleteI'm glad u've moved on
May God continue to strengthen u
Learn 2 encourage plp n dnt judge. Madam lean on God, bcos is higher Dan d highest. Devil is indeed in d body of men. The problems in ds country is caused by d citizens n NT d govt. God help us all.
ReplyDeleteBut u were d one who enabled the harsh comments. U shouldn't have since u know d story is real. These days pple are not too quick to believe anything. Distrust is everywhere. Meanwhile,I don't believe d poster wanted to reveal her identity. In this part of the world,rape victims aint that bold most times to do that.
ReplyDeleteAnon 9:23AM may God forgive u, @chynscillah may God forgive u
ReplyDelete@m-amie incase u dont knw dis also has everytn 2 do with Nigeria n d Chibok adoptions..wot do u think is happening to those girls there....Mrs XYZ isnt looking for pity....She is Healed already, she is a survivor
I sympathise with you.
ReplyDeleteshut up small goat!
ReplyDeleteDear poster we are sorry,pls cum bk and tell us ur story.we love u and we wil always be here for u!!
ReplyDeleteWe?????
DeleteDear miss XYZ, please do not take to heart the negative comments that has followed your story. Like you said it is he who wears the shoe that knows where it pinches. Someone said the negative comments were negligible, true, but they sting and the human nature tends to remember the bad more than the good.
ReplyDeleteJust to encourage you, I was glad when I read your closing post it seems you have found God who is the ultimate and that for me is a good sign, cos if you keep following Him and seeking Him, you will find rest.
Jer.31:3 The Lord appeared of old unto me saying, "yes I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with loving kindness I have drawn you Vs 4a. Again I will rebuild you and you shall be rebuilt...
Jer 29;11-12 For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me and I will listen to you.
I believe that God has a plan for you if you can trust Him and seek Him you will find peace. Pls. if you can read Ps 139; 1- 18. And you will know the God knows you and knows all that you have gone through including all that you couldn't share. Isaiah 54:4 says Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed. Neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame; For you will forget the shame of your youth. Isaiah 46:4 says, Even to your old age, I am He. and even to gray hairs, I will carry you! I have made, and i will bear; Even I will carry, and deliver you. My favourite Scripture i will leave with you Ps 18: 1-3. I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; My God, my strength in whom i will trust; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold, I will call upon the Lord who is worthy to be praised so shall i be saved from my enemies.
so be comforted and seek the Lord.
For me, i have come to take peoples opinion with a pinch of salt especially, negative ones. Gods opinion about me is what really matters to me.
So all the best, smile and let Him heal you.
@Poster, Almighty GOD will comfort you
ReplyDeleteAdeyemi Ikuforiji for Governor (Lagos State 2015)
Initially, you were going to declare your identity but after this long novel, you want to hide it. Abeg jor, swerve.
ReplyDeleteShe thinks we are fools
DeleteThank you jare, better person.
ReplyDeleteAm happy dat u have moved on,,d Lord's ur strength
ReplyDeleteDarling, i know it is difficult but try and forget that phase of your life, it wasn't your fault, it has happened and most importantly give love a chance. Love is a beautiful thing, forget your past and start life afresh, move on.
ReplyDeleteGF,u have every reason to thank God, you are alive, what if you were killed? Thank God for the gift of life , u know sdkers sometimes can be mischievous, most times they mean no harm, True love will find you, stay blessed.