OMG!!!
Hi
I am an ardent reader of your blog every day and thank you for sharing positive messages!
My story is not the usual typical love and relationship story but something different.
I am a grown man who should probably be married with kids now but I have a major obstacle in life and I have been trying to sort it out for the last 7 years but Right now it has taken it's toll on my health, relationship and life in general!
I suffer from serious gambling problem, anxiety and chronic depression.
I was partly raised in Nigeria but grew up in the United Kingdom where I had all my post secondary school education. I have a good degree and masters from one of the most reputable university here in the UK.
I never knew what gambling was until my second year at the university. What started as fun has seriously gotten out of hand, killing me slowly and leading me on the brink if suicide as I speak.
It all started from a small 10 quid bet now it has escalated to loosing an average of 3000 pounds every month and debts increasing everyday. As I speak I am in 15000 pound debt and homeless!
I Am so depressed! Angry! Disappointed in myself! How can a man who was so clever just lose his way and can't find it back?
I am on the brink of suicide as I speak but I think how selfish that would be. I have a great family although they don't seem to know how deep my problem is as i am the king of lying!!!
I am currently in a relationship with the most amazing woman I think I would ever be with But it's been lies after lies and i am worried she would leave soon as the previous ones have done due to the fact that they can't handle my gambling….. I mean who can blame them?
I really want to turn my life round cus if gambling was a drug am sure I would have overdosed and died!
Thanks.
*My brother you need JESUS and some kind of counselling..why don’t you seek some form of help?why don’t you sit your partner down and talk things and tell her you need help?that would take a lot of your shoulder
I am sure you know that you need to cut off contact with all the people you gamble with….CUT THEM OFF.
A new start with new friends isn’t a bad idea..locate a good church and start attending and tell the pastor your problem.
I wish you the best.
habits die hard.
ReplyDeleteits some force that just controls you and you cant take charge.
you just seem helpless but ....
brother, yes you can!
you can do it!
how?... DETERMINATION!
Pls who knows about any morning after pill I could take? Had sex early hours of dis mornin wit my fiance without protection. Tho I haven't taken anytin yet. I Heard abt postinor 2 but neva tried it b4. Iv used andrews liver salt on several occasions but don't know how it works and am not even sure of d dosage. Pls ladies in d house, help a worried sister. Linda eze u must know one or two things pls help. Tnx
DeleteLove u all
God has given him freewill stella, he got himself into this mess and he needs to get himself out of it.
DeleteStella, stop calling his name in vain. Stop been a religious bigot.
Tete is as addictive as cocaine,caffeine n nicotine...sportbet don dey hook me too small small n I never chop shishi b4...though na N200 every other day n 1k on sat n sunday. I now realise am d worst bookie/sport forecaster in d world,though sport esp football is not mathematics(d favourites don't alwz win)...I know ppl who play poker(kashi) for 3 days/nights non-stop...God have mercy on gamblers
DeleteAsk the boy-man that poked you.
DeleteAnon 12.20, I dont buy the fiancee crap, you are probably a teenager experimenting with sex, and lesson 1 should be "no unprotected sex" no matter the sweet mouth or promises he makes. If he loves you he will protect you from the implications of pills and notonly think about his own enjoyment. There are worse things than pregnancy that come from unsafe sex.
DeleteYes Postinor 2 is a morning after, works better 12 hours after intercourse its efficacy reduces after 24 hours and is totally ineffective after 48 hours.
Go to any pharmacy, the directions are on the pack.
Make smarter choices next time
Just keep praying,okay? The lord is your strength
DeleteMylifeasmoby.blogspot.com
Anonymous 12:20 drink postinor 2 sharp sharp. Take d two pills at once. Its effective if taken within 72hrs of intercourse
DeleteU better take postinor 2
DeleteIf you want free counselling let Stella know and I'll drop my email address and phone number with her. I stay in Nigeria though so you will have to do the calling. God be with you.
DeleteTo need God's intervention , this gambling is a sort of devourer in Ur life.
DeleteGo to victorious Pentecostal church in barking for deliverance .
Try white quinine tablet,it works better than postinor,take two tabs morning and evening....
DeleteAnon. 12:20 - Prostinor 2 = ectopic pregnancy = loss of fallopian tubes/ovaries..
DeleteAvoid premarital sex except you have faith as small as a mustard seed, patience like Sarah and Abraham... you know how to fast like Paul and pray like Silas.
- ShyGirl
First step to solution in life is realizing there is a problem. There is wisdom is taking steps to helping yourself. Non can help you better than yourself. Make a decision today that no matter what happens, you are going to quit gambling, Its not easy but you can do it. Call it a problem and go all out in solving it. Friends/family can only advice, but its up to you to take a step of faith. May God send his holy spirit to help you IJN.
ReplyDeleteIt is well o my brother.... my advise however is that you focus heavily on finding a way of paying off your gambling debt, as not paying will make you have an excuse to gamble some more trying to see if you can win.
ReplyDeleteAfter you have done this, spend every single cash you get on something tangible immediately you have the urge to gamble. Better still, give the money to someone you trust and hint the person not to give you the money anyhow.
Most of all, determine in your heart to change...... cos every other plan will fail if your mind is not fixed on changing.
This post on my blog is too hilarious not to share..... http://spatialadventure.blogspot.com/2014/05/hilarious-air-travel-passenger.html?m=1
1st step is working on yourself, that help is much needed, the after that he can pay off the debt, cos trust me when he even gets the money to pay off the debt, that is if he's going by your own advise, he's going to spend it on gambling aswell.
DeleteDear poster, admiring you have a problem is the very first step, that's good. There should be rehabs available for such an addiction and be commited to it. Until you seek help for yourself, nothing good might happen. I wish you all the best dear.
give your life to Christ and ask him to help you..open your mouth and cry out to him, tell him the change you desire to see in your life....and please when u be give your life to christlook for a bible believing church and start attending......spend time in the word and u will see a change.....this is not mere talk only jesus can change u and give u total freedom....it is well.....
ReplyDeleteThere is no cure for addiction. .....to drop one u take up another.....kapish!
DeleteTalk to tarabauer01@gmail.com She helped my wife and I at no cost
DeleteSeriously poster I just don't know the kinda advice to give to you..but the lil I can tell u is this;there is no good advice better than that which you give to urself..sit urself down,ask urself questions,is this really the kinda life u want or was aspiring for earlier in life?? Secondly,cut-off every relationship with all ur friends who gamble or whom u gamble with..thirdly;keep urself busy..find any good work that might keep u working overtime soo as not to enable u think of going out to gamble..trust me if u are very much busy;u won't even know when the 24 hours of the day is gone thereby keeping u off gambling..last but not the least;pray,fear God,go for counselling and try as much as u can to help urself.. Same problem as dat of poster is happening to soo many of my friends here at home..but theirs is Nairabet and merrybet(football betting)..God!! All this frustrates me..I just can't stand the sight..u ve to work for ur money soo u can value it when it finally comes..the spirit of Gambling takes the grace of God before it can ever leave someone..
ReplyDeleteMy guy first of all come back to naija.. The stress of everyday life will make you forget gambling and the depression will be cured easily when you eat suya and good Nigerian food. As for the the anxiety I'm not sure oh, because with Nepal, traffic and fear of kidnappers or armed robbers you may need anti anxiety pills...lol. On a more serious note you need to cut off from anything associated with gambling then go for deliverance! But one question, if you're homeless how did you catch a babe? Just asking. Good luck
ReplyDeleteNa wa for you. Come back to Naija just like that because at the back of your own mind, you think he's enjoying life there right? He isn't working his ass off to make money? And who ever told you gambling ain a problem in Nigeria either, and it's not only gonna drill him in the more. Abeg, give better advise. What's this crap?
DeleteThe answer to ur last question: he says he is a professor in lie matter. On a serious note, bros you have to search yourself if u are truly willing to stop gambling, abi cos you are neck deep in debts for now. If the answer is no, then I am sorry, e go hard. Sha open up to your family and seek the help of a counsellor too. Cos oh baby ready vamoose on hearing your tale oh.
DeletePs come to synagogue church of all nations for delieverance
ReplyDeleteLinda eze stop deceiving people. Poster, if u try it, u'll come back with more problem to sort out. DON'T TRY IT.
DeleteStella have said it all...
ReplyDeleteNothing to add...
QuEen Linda u need to be dethroned for grammatical errors. U de fall my hand for small small grammar. Pls its "stella has" not "stella have". Ur errors are becoming too frequent and they are very unexpected errors from the Queen herself. Pls read well before u post. Candid Advice! No insult intendEd!
DeleteKatty
QuEen Linda u need to be dethroned for grammatical errors. U de fall my hand for small small grammar. Pls its "stella has" not "stella have". Ur errors are becoming too frequent and they are very unexpected errors from the Queen herself. Pls read well before u post. Candid Advice! No insult intendEd!
DeleteKatty
U ve said it all stella,u need serious help nd counseling asap
ReplyDeleteGive ur life to Jesus christ. Pray against strong man of ur Father and Mother's house. Pray against powers that wants u to leave a wasted life. Pray against evil foundation, and spirit wife. Ask God for wisdom, and inner peace. Ask God to reveal the secret of ur problem to u. Look for a living church, join a group, and ask God to make u a vessel of honour in his house. Its well!
ReplyDeleteSalt
MFM things
DeleteI know this man
ReplyDeleteMr. MAN. You are like many men.
DeleteYou need to ask yourself why the betting houses set up shop. If you realize that it is to make profit, then you will see that you can never win. Ur loss is their gain.
Everytime you feel the urge to gamble, take the money and buy a shirt or jeans. Remind urself that the money would be lost anyway so why not lose it in something u can use.
U r addicted and to cure addiction, it starts by replacing the destructive one with a less destructive one.
Goodluck. ..oops! Thats a gambling word. God speed
You need to prioritize,its obvious you really want to change and settle down, if i were you,i would have picked up a church role and become very busy doing other stuffs with my gambling times,you need to get yourself out by praying the demon out;(sanctification),my brother invest your time and money into your life and your relationship,cut slack every negative friend,come to Christ and start a new life-its never too late,God bless you.
ReplyDeleteAt least you have identified your problem. Please if that environment you are in isn't helping, find your way back to naija.
ReplyDeleteMy bros. now only you waka come? Abeg come and pick up recruitment form and join Nigeria Army....sambisa forest here you come.when you start killing Boko haram boys you wouldn't ven remember any thing uncalled gambling infact the noise of Ak 47 alone will chase the evil spirit responsible for destroying your life..........
ReplyDeleteAnonymous 11:43 am, u cranked me up big time. Ur advise na real tough love.
DeleteGuy ds u r hilarious
DeleteBLOG ANALYSER: chai! He needs help
ReplyDeleteHey p***y boy!
ReplyDeleteYou need Jesus
Give your life to him
Stella, I don't quite agree with all u said. U need Jesus yes! Sit ur partner down now No! Not yet, start any form of rehab, be it deliverance, counselling or any other, before sitting her down to explain. No matter what u do, u got to stop it right now. It'll be easier for her to accept, knowing that ur doing something about it already. NB u need deliverance and counselling from a real man of God.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmmmm. Speechless.
ReplyDeleteBabe?
DeleteHow ur exams na?
Wishing u God's best.
Extend my fucking greetens to your "Dog killer Tony"
DeleteFriend, God is a present help in times of trouble. Take Stellas advice, also I would advice you to look for materials from Joseph Prince, a lot of people have received deliverance from addictions after listening to him and reading his books.
ReplyDeleteIts well
Magical Eyes
Yes Joseph prince is very good. Poster in Jesus u re safe and stress free. Pls locate a living chruch and keep urself busy wth God 's
Deletework. God bless u.
Very familiar. I know someone like this
ReplyDeleteStella's said it all. I used to have my addictions too, my dear trust me, I commited it all to prayer. Ask God to heal u, give u strength and discipline to resist d urge of gambling change certain thgs that could lure u back to the habit. i.e Change frds, contacts anythg @ all. If it be possible chg location too. Goodluck
ReplyDeleteYour gambling or generally the impulsivity of ur behavior is the cause of ur depression and anxiety. First u will need to be on anti depressants and anti anxiety
ReplyDeleteMedications to curb the symptoms. Ur next step should then be finding a support group like a gambling support group. U also need a strong family support system. Utilize all the coping skills and stay grounded by distracting yourself from the thoughts of gambling when it floods ur mind.
You are right. He needs to start with an inpatient treatment depending on how bad will determine the length. After discharge he can continue with outpatient with a psychotherapist and include some gambling anonymous meetings. Gambling is a serious addiction, it can ruin relationships. Good luck on your road to recovery.
Deleteyou need to be determined to leave such lifestyle...the truth of the matter is that,GOD will not come down from heaven to help you.....u have to re-trace ur step....the devil is dancing Skelewu on you...u dont know yet
ReplyDeleteI wish u the best.....
Read ur bible.....
Also....for dose playing alll ds NairaBet and all dt too....Pls stop it as well.....little by little.,it will become an Addiction!!
@Galore
Pray and pray
ReplyDeleteMy brother, pray Psalm 91 every night before the break of the next dawn. The purpose of this prayer is to ward of demons assigned push you to destructions in every form. God bless you Bro.
ReplyDeleteI will just go with stella's advice and yes you need to tell your partner, if she truly loves you she's gonna stay and help u straighten your life like Encouragement, some1 to lean on when u need it
ReplyDeleteSame way we all are addicted to SDK.
ReplyDeleteGod help us...
Tuning to synagogue of all nations
Gambling like any other form of addiction is not something u can stop by sheer will, you'll keep going back to it. The first step which you have taken is admitting you have got a problem. You need counseling, a support group and you need to let your family know what's going on so u can start to get your life together. Addiction is something you can only deal with a day @ a time.
ReplyDeleteI am going to tell u what I would tell my brother were he in ur shoes,to live in the UK no be by force so first things first better pack ur load and leave that gbese ,run to ur motherland o but u know once u do that no more heathrow for you? But don't despair there r other lovely countries to groove .Y I feel u need to leave is cos each time u get a bill reminding u of ur debt ur craving for suicide increases.When u also change location u will meet new froends who are anti-gamblers that will discourage u and tell ur family and woman d truth cause only d truth can set u free! Keep busy and pray too.I wish u luck
ReplyDeleteThe best way to get over one addiction is to look for another type of addiction. Look for something positive to direct all your time and energy to, change your friends, go to a rehab, talk to someone who you know can help you, then pay your debts. I don't understand how people consciously continue to do things they know is bad and killing them slowly, and then they start to look for help. I just don't understand!
ReplyDeleteDear poster,
ReplyDeleteI used to have a boyfriend in the uni with a gambling problem, very intelligent, handsome smart dude. His own was that he wouldn't admit its a problem.
I sat him down one day and I told him, 6 years from now, I will be a dr. your friends will also finish from med school and move to other countries where they would make something out of themselves, if you are comfortable spending your school fees and spending 10 years on the present class that you are in, just know that a time will come when your friends will step on you cose you are no longer in their level.
Gambling provides you with excitement, rush of adrenaline that's why you are also depressed especially when you loose and there is always an intense craving or hope that you might win and win BIG! When u feel this urge reach out for a friend, if you don't have any, call your girlfriend up and tell her you would like to go see a movie in the cinema. You can also try to distract yourself by going to the gym.
Give yourself a reality check. like i did my ex. Visualize what will happen if you give in to the urge to gamble. Think about how you’ll feel after all your money is gone and you've disappointed yourself again.
Avoid Isolation. If you gamble to socialize or be around other people, try healthier ways to build a social network. Volunteer, connect with old friends or make new ones, go to the gym or have a picnic with your gf!
Try to take it one step at a time. Get your gf involved if you trust her. both of you should set a boundary on how much you are allowed to send, if there is a left over try to send it to your family in Nigeria to buy land for you or take a trip in a 5 star hotel with your gf so you can see life outside your present environment.
First, try to get a 8-5 job so u can pay what u owe and stay busy. Try as much as you can to keep your self busy in every way you can- have sex, play football, go to the movies, go for conferences, take edx courses or any online course, go for shopping buy yourself something new with that money u intend to gamble with the list of what you can do with your time is endless. Being Busy is the first rule to stop or decrease gambling.
Its a psychological problem, you just need the zeal, will and the support of someone who loves you to make a change.
Talk to Jesus
ReplyDeleteIS 49:24-25. Shall the prey be taken from the might or the captives of the righteous be delivered? But thus says the Lord: "Even the captives of the might shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible be delivered...
ReplyDeleteYou can be delivered from your addictions. Cry out to God for help, give your life to Christ and seek help from a pastor or friend. Be accountable to someone who can tell you the truth. What ever you do pls don't go to synagogue. All the best.
IS 49:24-25. Shall the prey be taken from the might or the captives of the righteous be delivered? But thus says the Lord: "Even the captives of the might shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible be delivered...
ReplyDeleteYou can be delivered from your addictions. Cry out to God for help, give your life to Christ and seek help from a pastor or friend. Be accountable to someone who can tell you the truth. What ever you do pls don't go to synagogue. All the best.
Dear Postern step 1 is the fact that you know there is actually. Problem at hand. Overcoming addiction isn't only by mere words of the mouth but by real determination and prayers. Tell God everyday to help you to stopn open up to your family and girlfriend, there is so much relief in sharing your problem with your family especially if they are loving. And above all, find a bible believing church, start attending and speak with the pastor, God is there to help you out and draw you back to himself. All the best
ReplyDeleteU need serious deliverance,after dat always pray & believe God,,He has d final say & answer,,always trust in Him...
ReplyDeleteGalore i just tot of u today...
ReplyDeletehow's school?
@ poster, u ve made d most important
step which is identifying ur problem
n trust mi ur solution is jst nxt 2 u when u look out thru' d window.
I know a guy who has dis same
gambling problem like u hv, always begging 4 money, can know how to lie etc
My only advice dear is to open ip to ur woman if u havnt done so.
pray pray pray..God ain't sleeping
it is well with u.
Thanks alot....I am fine.
DeleteWe bless GOD for success all tru
@Galore
God will deliver you! But stella hv said it all! Work with that!
ReplyDeleteStElla has not have............if its to criticise and analyse othErs, We Will see ur strength; common grammar u no fit! Shame.
DeleteKatty
So people really get addicted to gambling??? That is serious.
ReplyDeleteThere's a spirit behind every addiction. Google, personal deliverance and go fasting while you praying during 3 days no TV no phone, no friends
ReplyDeleteMON AMI you are such a senseless idiot it's amazing.....see everyone here calling God and talking giving your life to Christ yet most of you here are a disgrace to his name....you are a poor ambassador of Christ and not worthy of taking his name in vain......stop fooling yourselves, you claim you know God and don't obey his commandments you fool yourselves.....claim you know God yet u all come here to talk trash and abuse........bloody hypocrites stop fooling yourselves...
ReplyDelete