- Sibling rivalry is real and some people manage to mask it whilst they do all the damage codedly,some parents do not know how to handle the war going on with their kids right now.
A blog visitor mailed me sometime back thus ''my elder sister keeps annoying and frustrating my life, if i react, every other person will say am jealous. So i wonder if am suppose to always keep quiet and keep getting hurt....''
What do you do when your sibling has drawn the battle line with you?..fighting back means hurting your parents and being labelled one with a jealous heart.
How would you advice the blog visitor dealing with sibling rivalry?who has had their own share of sibling rivalry(SR)
Some siblings are wicked and devilish....I know one that poisoned her sister out of jealousy...
ReplyDeleteMy cousins they don't ever agree 2girls twins,oh they read this blog if I call them now they would know themslfs @28 they can't tollorate themslfs,competition,jealousy,and one awys tryn to prove she's better dan the other,they have bEen taken to so many spiritual homes by their parents yet no way,mother love the hardworking one father love the intelligent one (twins oh )they can'tsleep on the same bed they are not on their both bbm chats one is friends with me the other one hate me for that,hahahahaha but I just love them both they are both unique in their own ways I wonder y they won't just see that?
DeleteBelieve it or not,someone has turned their backs to each other spiritually.The twins need prayers.My cousins were sworn enemies for yrs, over childish issues. On her death bed,their 'nice' step mum confessed tearing them apart.According to her,when she married their dad,she knew a united front could make her uncomfortable.The disunity always saw her mediating and acting as go~ between for them. Sad to say,her death did nothing for the 2 sisters.The discord had too gone far for redemption.Pray for your siblings. Devil is very crafty!
DeleteI really don't know how my brothers deal cos I'm d only gal in d family but I really think parents shud learn to treat all kids equally regardless of their age difference..atleast it worked 4 my family..I'm d only gal nd evri1 xpects me to do d chores..I mean evrithing but my dad figured out a way to get evri1 involved even himself so no child is greater or lesser than d other..just treat them dis way frm infant nd they'll grow with it..some parents can b biased tho cos they always have favorite nd dts sickening!!! @xclucivexter!!!
ReplyDeleteMost times I believe it's the parents' fault.
DeleteChanneling all love n energy to one child n believing the others won't feel not too loved enough?
I remember Joseph in the Bible and his brothers .
Parents,learn to balance d love n care.
I've seen cases of d most loved turning d black sheep n vice versa.
Thanks
Shall I tell u this? No matter how much love a parent or both parents show on all their kids, believe me, there's always a favorite one. People will argue this, but that's the fact and it has been since inception, and so it will remain until eternity.
DeleteNow, this doesn't mean that a parent or both parents do not love the rest of the kids, they do...but one will always be foremost. Perhaps the weaker child, or the smartest child may get more attention. Or even one that may have health challenges... or the less socially confident child. These are a few reasons why some parents are more endeared to a particular child.
Outsiders may not know these facts, only the children will know. And the danger in it is if the other kids don't take it lightly, as the parents mean NO harm and aren't being spiteful. Some kids capitalise on it and make issues out of it, that's where the problem starts.
If amongst the kids there's an overbearing one who likes attention, then jealousy for the pet is eminent. But as parents, u should study ur kids' character so that u can manage unnecessary strife caused by your attending more to one of ur kids. Otherwise even when u grow old and u depart, the strife will become a generational issue. It all balls back to how parents can manage their selective love for a particular child.
People assumed I was my mom's favorite even though am the first child. But I have always known my youngest sister to be her heart beat. But not for one day did I mind them both. Infact I joke about it and sometimes tell my mom off jokingly, when she wants to gist with me. I tell her, oh, so because your Bff daughter isn't around u want to use me abi? And we laugh about it. But not everyone will be like me. What i take lightly is a main issue for somebody else. But when it becomes a perpetual family issue, parents need to tackle it with prayers.
Yes u hv spoken well there's always a favourite child among d children
DeleteSisi eko u hav spoken well but the blame lies on the parent true every parent has a favorite but they should be subtle in showing the favoritism like my mum she makes it obvious she loves my brother above everyone of us and she is ready to step over our head incloding my dad to make him happy we all resent him and we pray to GOD everyday to give us love in our heart for him even though he has a bad attitude and we all believe his bad attitude has made him the least sucessful amongst us. But in my dad's case my sis is his bestie and everybody knws but he doesn't allow his love for her get in the way of anything and dat my sis can be said to be the best sis in the whole world she has a very good heart no wonder my dad loves her so much
DeleteI think u should ignore ur elder sister oh!
ReplyDeleteSibling rivalry can sometimes be d fault of both or either parents,when they show their preference for one child over d other.
Most times,It can also be as a result of either of d siblings not being @d level where he/she ought to be in when d other esp d younger one is doing better.
Parents should try as much as possible to treat every child equally,then d kids in d fam should work hard to be moving @d same pace wif his/her mates. And remember that y'all maybe from same parents buh y'all got different destinies,just do ur own thing,see urselves as a team not rivals. I grew in a fam where we r a team,we disagree to agree,we correct each other when any1 is wrong. C'mon if u see ur sibling as a rival,do u know how many enemies of ur fam that would rejoice over u? U guys may have disagreements once in a while buh ur not permitted to be rivals. Can a house divided against itself stand?Jor oh!
Hmmm Stella this post made me cry. It brings bad memories that I have been trying to forget for years.
DeleteI had a sister, yes I said 'had' because today she is no lo Pls leave me alone. I beg u, leave me. Enough of the insult from all of u. Am I the only person Taiwo spks to? Was I the person who gave her info about all btw her and ade? If ade being d idiot that he is, assumes that I can divulge any vital information to Taiwo, how do I explain my own mother who's arguing an incident she insists I was a witness to, and was leaked to Taiwo? Pls listen to ade I don't care, but let me be. Thank u. Pls dont respond. I just needed to conclude this, as over my dead body will I ever revisit this issue with anybody. Never again longer here. she went to be with the Lord. And every day I blame myself for her death. I didn't kill her o, but we never made peace till she died. Infact, I think she committed suicide because she couldn't handle the heat of what became of our 'sibling rivalry'. It had nothing to do with our parents, they loved us and provided for each of us equally. But my sister was a very lazy person and she became a burden on everybody. She caused us so much embarrasments and non of us was happy about how she made outsiders insult our parents sometimes.
My sister became a Cain to my Abel when I got married. I married at 22, and she was 6years my senior. She couldn't even manage any relationship not to talk of getting engaged or getting married. I used to wonder why, until I pleaded with my husband to pls allow my sister come stay with us a bit, so that if her environment changed and she moved away from the preying eyes of family members, that perhaps it would do her a little good. Not because of marriage alone but for other issues concerning her generally. And that if she saw how my hubby and I relate at home and all, perhaps she would be encouraged to make her relationships work. These I decided after my parents and I talked extensively about the issues that my sister was facing. Even years ltr when She was almost 40, yet she became more of a liability to all and sundry.
My husband liked her so it wasn't long before he agreed with my suggestions. Infact he also tried to hook her up with responsible guys that were hard working and could encourage her to be steadfast. All to no avail. The problem became embarrassing for me when my sister moved into my house. My hubby got her different jobs but she would either go for the interview 3hours late or she wouldn't go at all. Sometimes giving the most annoying excuses that would want to make me slap her. I would reprimand her because I wasn't happy at all. My hubby being a good man didn't insult her or change towards her...I was even angry at some point because I wanted him to also scold her instead of pampering her. long story short, after 2years i had to tell my parents that i couldn't keep her in my home again because I didn't want her to cause me issues in my marriage. So she left.
My siblings and i live in the U.S, but our parents live in Nigeria. We are from a wealthy home (I humbly say)... so many people assumed that it wa my parents that indulged my sister's unserious lifestyle. That wasn't the case. Then my mom became very furious with her and she decided to stamp her foot down. Everyone became hostile to my sister, we didn't hate her, but we thought that would make her change. It actually worked for a while, but later it didn't.
My mom prayed, fasted, prayed and prayed for her. We went both spiritual and physical but nothing changed. So after a while everyone left her alone. Then she travelled to Jamaica to meet a man she net online. We were all so upset because she just disappeared for months without telling anyone. I remember how I lashed at her, which was the very last time I would speak with my sister. I gave it to her badly because I was furious.......
...she did so many things that severed my marriage after she left. She told lies against hubby and I that we used to ridicule her and that was the reason she left our home. I was angry, I told her off and he stopped communicating with us.
DeleteShe had no money or job, what would she be doing in Jamaica? Our mom cried and cried, gosh... to cut the long story short, few weeks later, her friend contacted me to say that my sister was DEAD!!!! How? When??
It was hell for my family, my parents haven't fully recovered from it. Neither have I. I buried my own sister. But before that, when I flew in to Jamaica to get her corpse, as I cleaned her up I asked her questions as if she could answer me. This was after I got angry.. after starring at her lifeless beautiful body....i called her a COWARD, wicked and heartless.. for causing us so much pain by her death.
Then I cried again as I held and kissed her body....as I wished all was well between us before she died. I still believe that perhaps if my siblings and I were a little more resilient to condone her excesses, that maybe she wouldn't have died. Yes I think so..and that singular reason aches my heart till date. Otherwise what would have compelled her to go faraway to Jamaica? A country she had never visited prior to that time, no had any affiliation?
Family is very important. Moreover, there are some issues that parents cannot solve within their kids, that only siblings can solve or notice of themselves. That is if done in sheer love. Constant animosity will only make us distant from each other, and this may cause more harm that'll end up affecting the entire family.
Yes my sister had serious issues that was beyond understanding, but I never wished for her to die. Not at all. Now in retrospect, I feel that her problem was even better to handle than not having her around anymore. Now if given the chance again, I would rather deal with her issues than struggle with coping with the perpetual silence of not having her with us anymore.
I loved my sister dearly, but she died without knowing this. Please make peace with ur siblings if u haven't..yes some can be overbearing and annoying, but be a little more resilient to avoid eternal heartaches that may be caused by fighting or neglecting them .i shared this with so much pains, but I needed to do so.. perhaps to encourage someone to desist from sibling rivalry of any kind.
I loved my sister. I still love her.
You only acted how you felt was right, you did all that was in your capacity.
DeleteReading this makes me want to show my sister more love. She is depressed but she loves God. I've pushed her so hard to do better and one day she tried to kill herself. Instead of understanding, I insulted her from her selfish act. This time she tried to kill me. I left the house we lived together to go and sleep over at a friend's place for fear of safety - he almost wanted to sleep with me.
She's better today, im more understanding.
Am laughing at the mix up in my earlier post bcos I input a friend 's bc msg in error. Which Is y my second paragraph appears incoherent. Lol. I was shedding tears as I wrote this and didn't bother to proof read. Pardon me. But am sure that sense can be made of my point anyhow. @anon12:11 pls show her love. Trust me it hurts more when u lose a sibling in d midst of strifes that could have been managed. It hurts. I pray God to heal my heart. Thanks Stella.
DeleteThis is a topic vry close to home. SR (or so i thought) has been going on between my sister and I. She's so envious of me that I even c her in my dreams, but God has always conquered her for me. I know very soon d host of heaven will trample upon her for me and she will die (yes it is dat bad nd d bible says : suffer not a witch to be alive) by fire, by force! Amen
ReplyDeleteJesus Christ! Anonymous 10:12AM, you are the evil sibling walahi. You wish your sister dead? Kai!!!!
DeleteWow...that bad???
DeleteAnon 10:21AM
DeleteHope this your prayer for your sister does not recoil on your own head.
From your comment you sound like the one with a problem
Better take it easy.
As for me....
Nothing like sibling rivalry, my parents treated us all alike.
Except for the occasional cat fights...my younger sister is my best friend, and she says the same about me.
*Nichole Smith*
@anon 10:12,give us gist Abeg! Y wil u wish ur own sister dead.thins r happening ooo
DeleteChoi!God!nothing person no go hear for sdkb! Can u imagine what a sister is wishing her own blood sister? If I may ask, how were u people brought up?where are ur parents? Who did this to these sisters? I can't deal! I thank God for my wonderful dad and mum( may her soul continue to rest in peace)for the love u showed to us and shared among us......I love my siblings and I can DIE for them!
DeleteThatisokochic!
Lord have mercy! I think I just committed a sin by even reading ur comment.....shuuuuuuuuu! Death for ur sister???? You're evil.
DeleteAnon 10:1you need to go on your knees and ask God for forgiveness.
DeleteBlood of Jesus.......Anon 10:12am...u are a demon,,,that's just the summary of u......and God forbid...if anything happens to ur sister...u will be the first to shed tears...need i say crocordile tears sha....
DeleteJust take it easy with your sibling jare because you guys might be best of friends later.
ReplyDeleteSibling sha! , I have half sisters nd they have showed me in every way how they detest me. I got no time for no one as long as God keeps vindicating me. Jealousy is indeed EVIL...
ReplyDeleteThis Siblings rivalry issue is really a strong one, it's difficult to this is one solution for curbing all, I guess parents have a special wisdom for tackling such. @Poster, call ur sister and talk to her in a lovely tone, I guess she is not obii okwute! (Stone heart) if she persists, report her to someone she loves and listens to.
ReplyDeleteWell it's usually a phase and it will pass. I think it's common amongts siblings in the same age bracket.
ReplyDeleteI remember how I and my immediate younger brother whom I am 14 months older than fight daily while growing up. Our fights were so bad that my dad whom we all dread then couldn't do anything about it.
I remember when we had a guest and she had to use my room, I complained that I didn't want to share my room with her, so my mum said I should be sleeping in my brothers room for that period, could you guys imagine that at night I and my brother will use chalk and ruler and divide the bed into 2. Then in the middle of the night, If I or my brother wakes up first, we quickly put on the light to see if the other person has crossed the chalk line, even if it's a foot. If yes, come see fight, we won't stop the fight until our parents come and seprate us then punish us.
Is it when I use to hide his home work or 1 leg of his shoe and enjoy watching him cry while looking for them. I remember the times when he will purposely pass out gas that smells like rotten egg where I'm eating just to annoy me LOL.
I remeber him hiding my school bag almost evey morning. Sometimes either I or him will go and dirty the others school uniforms so that by the time the other is ready to wear it, the person we finf it very dirty. We were always looking for things we will do to each other to make the other person angry or even cry.
The day we fought in the kitchen, all hell was let loose. The fight started because he didn't want to take the food I dished out for him because he knows I purposely put the smallest meat in the pot for him, and I used plastic plate to put the food, LOL. I think that was our last fight( we were both in the university then). We turned my mother's kitched upside down that day. My mother reported us to every1 even our priest and relatives.
Our rivalry was so bad that we can't spend a day without quarelling or fighting,it was like the air we breath. We always tried to make the other person look bad infront of our parents.
As we grew older, the fights reduced to heated arguments then miraculously stopped. Now my brother doesn't joke with me at all. Even as I'm married he still looks out for me as if I'm his baby sister. Anyday he will visit me, you need to see me running around to make sure I prepare the best food for him,LOL.
The day I was in labour for my first child, he nearly died of anxiety. He cried eeh and didn't leave my bedside throughout my stay at the hospital.
So poster should not worry, it happens. Just try to avoid anything that will make you and your sister fight. Pray to God to give you the grace to overlook somethings. I don't know how old you guys are but I hope you guys will outgrow it.
@Genny baby, some don't over grow the hatred o. Thank God 4 yours! Read my other comment and see wat I mean. These guys I talked abt are not kids anymore. In their 30s. Tell me how dis hatred won't extend 2 their kids in future.
DeleteThat using chalk to divide the bed sounds like my sister and I, I used to wake her at night to tell her she was in my space. We used to fight on the main road, tear our clothes like mad Ppl. We still argue and quarrel a lot but she's the love of my life, and she does everything in her power to make me happy.
DeleteKai genny baby!i cant believe i shed tears reading your story.i,my bro and younger sis use 2 b like dat 2 o,buh miraclously i stopped fighting wit my bro,my younger sis own no b hear,last xmas wen we were al home we had a heated argument,den she started crying and teln me why we neva get along,and i realised i caused it all.i felt veri bad,den i invited her 2 my place in abj.nd we had a lot of fun and catching up 2 do.
DeleteGenny Baby you are a Character, I don laff tire.
DeleteYou are lucky your Bro ddnt re-arrange ur dentition for u.
Nuvi, LOL @re-arrange my dentition. Na God just save me o.
DeleteI remember the day he beat me to the extent my nose started bleeding and in anger I went and grabbed a razor blade and cut him on the shoulder(covers face).
Thank God it wasn't a deep cut(my parents would have killed me).
We were both horrified when we saw ourselves bleeding, luckily our househelp then helped us with first aid and we managed to convince her not to tell our parents what happened. Since that day, we try not to injure ourselves while fighting.
Thank God those days are in the past now.
Genny baby...i read ur comment over and over again....and i had a good laugh....u sef get mind,,,u dey fight man.......
DeleteI also had a little of SR but in my own case.....na me no get respect......I used to call my elder brother by name(d gap btw us is wide oo)....all of a sudden he just changed and said i MUST start calling him "brother" with immediate effect.....me sef wey stubborn...i no gree.....when our parents are not around...he will beat d hell out of me and i also will not keep quiet...i will continue to abuse him....it was so bad to d extent that i started insulting him with songs( di won lenu,,baba ka won leyin.....di won lenu,,baba ka won leyin,,,kiniun aye to n hale momi,,,ba mi mu so)......wen beating reach me...i reluctantly started calling him "brother"......fast forward years later....i joined him in d uni....he was in 400l and i was in 100l....he was all over me,,always wanting to know if i was fine.....i dont even know how we got over it but we did....we are both married with kids now and we are as close as ever....infact we have spoken on phone twice today.....thank God we got over ours....
Ezewanyi was here
ReplyDeleteWe hv missed you. Nil
DeletePls sometimes u hv to act like a fool in order for peace to reign. Pls try as much as u can to make ur sibling love u
ReplyDeleteVe neva xperience it cos my cstas & I r jux to close.wnt 2 d same nursery sch,same pry sch, same second. sch uni . Well all lies in d hands of ur parent
ReplyDeleteSholamatty
Sibling rivalry I'd so bad in my family, it has now extended to the wives and very soon I'm sure to the children. We are three boys in the family and if you spend time with our mum and dad, you will clearly know who their favourite is and that is the first son. I have decided to face my family and forget what can not be changed. I pray to God for wisdom to bring up my children fairly with equal amount of love and support
ReplyDeleteSeriously,ds sibling rivalry sometimes is actually caused by parents,some of them refuse 2 believe dt every child is difft n unique in their own special way,they want all 2 behave lik each other,its so annoying,I think parents should work more on their parenting.
ReplyDeleteIt will go a long way 2 help settle kids rivalry.
Sdk baby! According to ur story u heard from one side and not from both.. It would be kind of u to always hear from both sides before u judge cos u never know what the situation is really! depending on the story u were told! Stay blessed.
ReplyDeleteSdk baby! According to ur story u heard from one side and not from both.. It would be kind of u to always hear from both sides before u judge cos u never know what the situation is really! depending on the story u were told! Stay blessed.
ReplyDeleteSibling rivalry: MY MUM & HER SIS
ReplyDeleteMy mum's elder sis is so jealous of my mum ehn dat even outsiders notice it, now she has passed it to her children especially the female ones, my cousins re so jealous of my brothers n I ...always saying my grandma loves us more dan dem,if my grandma gives me ankara nd dey get to no she must buy ankara n lace for dem ooo, if not she ll b in trouble.. I tire for dem..bad pele people..HISSED
SDK, dis issue is a very one and it takes a lot of understanding n tolerance if not things will spiral out of control. Am d eldest and I hv two younger sisters but my immediate younger sister won't give me peace, if u see r insulting me, u won't believe am d elder. I have a forgiving spirit n I tend to overlook r attitude but it's getting worst everyday, now i've decided to give r space.
ReplyDeleteMe and my siblings are very cool with each other. No back biting... this hatred btw siblings starts 4rm when they are still very lil, as parents, when ur kids fight each other, spank both of them both the innocent and the guilty one. Then talk some sense in2 the guilty one later. Don't side any of them. Even if u love one's personality over the other, don't let them notice hence, the hatred starts brewing... my ex and his only sis hate each other so much dat they can kill each other. Which I think started 4rm when they were lil. Do u know they hate each even 2 the point dat when their mum was dying @ the hospital they fourth right there, and even brought thugs 4 each other right there @ the hospital dat peeps gathered and watched. It got 2 a point, the hospital management got involved and wanted 2 discharge the sick woman by force. Sadly, she later died...Thank God I didn't end up in such family. God I can't stand 2 see my kids hate each other. It will kill me. God forbid!
ReplyDeleteTo an extent exists in most families. Parents need to keep this to a minimum by ensuring their wards are treated fairly and equally.
ReplyDeleteClick my name for all your celebration cakes and cupcakes, cheers
Just act like d fool for peace to reign,its wit time everytin is gn be aite
ReplyDeleteWat den happens if ur act of foolishness does not work? I have tried all methods but did nt work. Can u believe my own sister gave birth on a thursday but herself and husband told my bro and parent friday evening and myself and other sister on saturday? I used to cry nd cry hard about it. I made calls nd all sorts bt their (2 of dem) husbands have successfully broken d love and peace we used to share. And I have sworn neva to 4give them but still dey are my sisters. What I don't understand is y women let their husbands ill manner affect their own family? And I have learnt to treat in-laws as who dey are; just in-laws! My story is a long one for another day but I can't wish ill 4 my sisters cos blood is very thick nd family is family!
DeleteSibling rivalry hmm mm. ...I have a sis 5yrs older than me. I Got married at 20 and she was still single. We started fighting quite early. As little children we would fight over anything till we stopped speaking to each other. She always tried to put me down nothing I did was ever good enough for her. Imagine when I bought aso ebi for my wedding and sold for 2k she said I was trying to cheat people that it's sold for 1600. She went ahead and bought another one for she and her friends.
ReplyDeleteMy dear SDK and blog visitors!!! This topic is very real and almost getting out of hand in some families oh. Hmm, the one in my family eh, in-fact , if i start writing about her i will write till tomorrow!..Hmm, in her own case she plans against every body, fight's every body except one, she has even started making one of our brother's wife uncomfortable, she will go and stay in this our brother's house for months ( she is the only one that dose that in the family oh! ) i remember we family members telling her one day to leave that house and let the woman enjoy her marriage , i mean who dose that? she will go from one church to the other, praying that every body should die ( as if God answer's such prayers! ) The thing is all her prayers continue to back fire on her. Why do i say so? one, she is in her 40's no husband no child, now we got her a place so she can go get a life. My dear blog visitors do you know what she is doing now? Sleeping with the neighbour's husband!!! In the same compound!!! Who dose that!!!! Hmm. I am praying the wife find's out and deal's with her. This is just 1/3 of this story oh.
ReplyDeleteMy elder sis and I is another story for another day..I ignore whatever she does to me cos her usual statement's always "I don't blame you","it's not your fault" etc. You see,it started when we were so little. She was a class ahead of me then in primary school but I did way better than her which made my class teacher persuade my dad to allow me write common entrance. My dad agreed but had to make her write the common entrance too which she passed too but that was the beginning of every other thing in our house. She got pregnant after secondary school while I gained admission into the uni. at about the same period she got pregnant. She insults me,curses me,hates me. Inshort,my sight alone disgusts her. The last fight we had was what made me conclude that she was no longer a sis of mine cos no sister would wish the other Stagnation,failure to mention a few. My parents and eldest sis has tried everything to no avail. She's been so bitter since I finished school,served and got a job. You guys won't understand really.
ReplyDeleteP.S: she's in the university now.
I am the first child in the family of 5 a woman and 43 yrs old my immediate junior sister 40 detest me,she does not respect me and talks to me anyhow.It all started from the time we were both young and at home with my mum (my father is late).The situation grew from bad to worse after the death of my dad. I do most of the work at home,and I dare not complain of headache or tiredness to my mum,she will rather have me dead than my sister doing any house chores.We live on the first floor of the building, I alone will fetch water from the well to fill a drum and she(my junior sister) will come to fetch from the water for her bath. Who born me to complain? Any complain will lead to more trouble.At a point my mum said she wished I am not her first child that she prefer my junior sis to be her first.All these gave me an independent nature and today am better off,I am happily married wt 2 kids (twins) a senior staff in one of the new gen banks and God gave me the grace to forgive both of them.My mother caused it all!!! As for my sister, the way she had it all at home was not the same way in her marriage,when the husband want to beat her to death, I personally went to remove her from the matrimonial home. Most people that know us will say we are not from the same parents because the character, attitude and disposition to life is totally different.
ReplyDeleteYour story is similar to mine. If you know the shit I have tolerated for over 20yearsfron my immediate younger sister, u will pity me. My mum loves her despite all her faults. The girl cares only about herself. She can't do sisi in the house.talk oabout "the laziest thing ever liveth". When I was growing up, d hatred was so much that I planned to kill her.I thought of different methods of committing the murder. What stopped me was the consequence. Yes, it was that bad! And guess what? We r both working now yet she still behaves like a goat. She can't ever do anything for anybody in d house but for her boyfriend, she is a slave. She will work n work to impress him. One day, when it is too late, he will find out her true character. Selfish n lazy biach.what pains me the most is that over the years, I end up doing double work cos someone has to do what she won't do. And I'm older. If I complain to my mum, she insults me instead. Says I keep finding faults in d gal. Its my mum's attitude towards her that made her grow into a human goat. If u want your child to have sense, correct them when they r small so they grow up with the sense. And not wat my dumb mum has done
DeleteAnon 6:36pm.....i understand ur plight but please dont ever refer to ur mum as dumb.......ur mother is ur mother.....
DeleteWell, siblings rivalry is as old as cain and abel! I wrote something sbout it on my blog sometimes Ago too; my kid brother and I used to fight a lot while we were growing up, my parents were tired of the reports, at a time, I just started to ignore, it wasn't easy as I hate to keep things on my mind but I kept reminding my self I was older than him, he was my brother and not my competitor; that's how we outgrew it oh!
ReplyDeleteMy self and my sister are like cat and rat,I can't remember when it went wrong with us,cos I remember as kids I loved her to bits(she's just 2years my senior)even one aunt who dosent no our issues reacalled to me ow I used to follow follow my sister up and down while growing up and I was like that's true, when we became teenagers she wld rather gist with cousins and friends and if peraventure I walk in on d gist she wld keep quiet or ask me to excuse dem, dis went on even till adulthood,so we used to have a lot of fights which by the way I was ready to dig it out with her whenever she wants it,so growing up with her treating me that way made me keep my liitle secrets to myself or share with friends but not her. My sister could be said to have a superiority complex,feels I am not intelligent enuf, can't roll in her "circle,says am jealous and envious of her,and if u see how I proud and protective I am of her outside u would be amazed that this same pple don't see eye to eye.I could never tell anyone anytin bad about my sister except my immediate family who knew us,but she on the other hand would go about spoiling me amongs her friends and they would just conclude am a mean spirited person not until they get to know me will they know otherwise,even as she has gotten married now u would think her atitude would change, but she still sees me like am beneath her,since she got married I tried letting go of all the hurts of years past to try to get along with her,then came one unwarranted quarel which she started spewing a lot of trash, I was like mehn I give up on dis whole relationship with her,over the years I have learnt to just keep her at arms length,cos am the kind of person when I withdraw emotionally that is it,so no calls no messages, whenever we see we try to be civil, by the way I love her daughter to bits, I just hope the relationship with my sister and I won't affect her kids and mine when I start having kids.
ReplyDeleteOk, so I'm waiting for my sister to comment. That's if she wasn't the one that emailed Stella with that comment.
ReplyDeleteWen we were growing up, we used to fight one anoda like crazy,but today,d respect n love are thr and no such tin again!
ReplyDeleteI have never experienced this. The love we share as siblings is priceless.
ReplyDeleteI gues dis happns in every home dependin on d stage of growth. Siblings will alws fight while growing up. I hav a very troublesome sis. My parnts hd 6 of us(3boys&3girl)&shiz d 2nd girl. While growing up she ws alws d 1 staring up troubles. If my mum or popsy givs anybody anytin she wud wnt to hav dat same tin plus she may nt evn need it. Shiz greedy, quarelsome,abusive,brags a lot. She hd problems wit every1 including me d lastborn.my parents settled quarel tire! That dint mk us hate ha. My parts will mk us still eat frm same plate aftr d quarel. If u say no then be ready to stay hungry dat day! The good tin iz dat thr ws neva any physical fight, jes quarel. We used to dread my dad's punishment eh. Bur d funny tin is dat she'z also prayerful &a sweet persn to be wit wen shiz in her good mood! She cud die for any of us then bur dats jes ha nature.*troublesome*.lol. While growing up we wr all forced to tolerate ha &love ha bcos shiz our sis &we cnt push ha away. We prayd for ha to marry a rich man otherwise na trouble oh. Lol. Thnk God he answered our prayers. Today shiz married wit a son. Still troublesome! 1 minute shiz dashing u money & accessories, d next minute shiz accusing u of takin ha brazillian weavon or rolex wristwatch, aftr some hrs or a day she'll call to say shiz found d hair or woteva ws missing! Lmao. My mum wud alws say av u spoken to ur *wahala sister* lately? Hahahaha! Shiz jes a clown really! I love ha soo much tho!. She visits dis blog &am sure she'll attack me soon! *runsaway* lolz
ReplyDelete*Stirring* , *my parents*
Delete*stirring up*, *my parents*
Deletelol....sibling rivalry very funny.....my sis and i use to fight alot and we r just 2 years apart.....the last time we fought was when we were in uni like 20 something years ago.....it was during one holiday and my mum asked her to do something and she pretended not to hear. meanwhile she knew she had an outing planned out. when it was time for her outing she left and my mum now said i should go and do that chore, begging me cos i was the oldest and should understand...i said mummy never oh, no be only me go dey work cos i be senior....like a good girl i eventually agreed...when my sis came back of course i confronted her and she gave me attitude.....na dia i give am slap and fight started, we fought and tore each others clothes..lol.....of course we had a family meeting and got a lecture from my parents.....since then we have been good friends and have each others back........
ReplyDeleteWhenever i come across stories like this "SR" i don't hesitate to get on my knees to thank God for the gift of wonderful siblings; they also happen to be my best friends et al..... @poster, its well, just learn to always ignore, play with them and also pray together. God Bless you
ReplyDelete@i_ChoPtas_Not
My sister and I are cats and rat, and I doubt if we can ever get along. I can't pin point when the whole rivarlry started but I remember I used to adore her so much while growing up,she is 2yrs my senior,even recently one of my aunts who don't know ow bad our relationship is now was saying she remembers when we were younger and I used to follow follow her everywhere,when we were teenagers she would rather gist with my cousins or her friends than me, and paraventure I walk in on d conversation she would keep quiet or ask me to excuse them this continued to adulthood o! I can tell you my sister has a delusioned sense of superiority complex,thinks am too dumb to be associated with, I can't roll in her circle, am envious and jealous of her,if u see the way I speak highly and talk about her with pride to pple u would think we were sugar and spice whenever we had a quarel which was so often she would take my matter to her friends and spoil me in front of them in which I could never bring myself to do, and d so called friends would never ask me anything but just conclude am a mean spirited person until when I get to actually relate with them,while me I could never tell anyone anytin contrary about my sis,my friends just assume we r close cos we look alike, it is just my immediate family who knew the real deal in which they had tried over the years to make us get along, for where?she would say so many hurtful things to me, and I would never back down on her I was ready to either fight or exchange words with her however she wants it,I don't call or send messages to her, all this continued even after she got married,I decided to be more civil with her, you would think marriage would change her until we had our last quarrel which had nothing to do with her but she had to butt in to display her sense of grandeur,after that fite I just locked up cos,even when we see I am cordial but u know ow siblings gist and catch up is not part of it,I am d kind of person when I get hurt frequently I just switch off emotionally. By the way I luv her daughter to bits, I just hope the relationship between me and my sis won't affect our kids in the future.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous 10.21 am. I am not the one with the problem oh, the whole family is still pleading with her to leave this married man and go look for a widow or a divorced man , are you married ?( i am with kids ) how will you feel if your husband is dating your neighbour? This woman just gave birth a few weeks ago and this my sister went there to eat rice and smile with the poor woman, i can't beat her because she is an adult and older than me, every body in the family is waiting for the day his wife will catch her, what do you know about me? imagine a woman that will quarrel with some one and start praying for their children to .die. What can my problem be? That i have a great husband, great children and that i am rich? I beg don't say what you don't know.
ReplyDeleteHow can one have such negative feeling for their sibling. I love my siblings so much I wouldnt even think of hurting them in anyway and they feel the same way too despite anything.
ReplyDeleteHmm I stil av issues wt my younger brother he wsnt like that before until he gained adnission into d uni tho then I ws abt graduating he srtrd avin unneccessary pride ad felt its ok if he's rud wen we an lil argumnt d nxt tn he wd wnt to hit me wt a stilck or an iron rod well I dnt always alow d fight go cs I alwys end up injuring hm serios cs wen am angry I cd do anitn.av finally cm to a conclusion 4 peace to reign ignore make hm feel he dsnt exist call hm wen is neccessary delete hm 4rm social media I dnt get 2 c hm all d tym bt wen I do I avoid hm like a plague cs d nxt tym he tries crap wt me I mite end up killing sm1.my parent dn talk tire sha ad it brks my mon hrt smtyms 2 c us fight who cares he's nt d only sibling I av stil av 2 others dt respect me well ad we r very gud frds.well my brother reads ds blog too hope he sees it.
ReplyDeleteNa my bro_inlaw(EJIMCHUKWU) I dey time!!! Ha ha ha!!!! I don tell am make him no marry or born oh! Bcos I go so so show am pepper!...........OKIJA WIFE
ReplyDeleteNa my bro_inlaw(EJIMCHUKWU) I dey time!!! Ha ha ha!!!! I don tell am make him no marry or born oh! Bcos I go so so show am pepper!...........OKIJA WIFE
ReplyDeleteI love my siblings n they all love me too!
ReplyDeleteI've got 2siblings a bro & sis.. My sis is my immediate elder and we are very close we are more like best friends and we don't keep secrets no matter how bad it is from each other but I won't forget how we always fight while growing up and how I bite her during our fight and screams when she beats me harder after the bite.. Our closeness has made my close cousins very jealous but I'm grateful to God for the love and understanding that exist between us!
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