Actress Dayo Amusa has a word for you women ,you can either read and assimilate or read and do #yinmu na you sabi
She says
''Some of us complain of problems in marriage and some are down with one sickness or the other simply because we don’t want to overlook those irrelevant things.
Why on earth should a woman carry the husband’s phone when he is in the bathroom just because she wants to catch him in his sexcapades?
Why create time just to drive around town looking for where his car is parked? Why liaise with your female friends to get him caught when some of them are after him and ready to take him from you? Na high blood pressure you wan give yourself
I don’t think this is necessary because even the man preaching to you and kissing his wife on national TV could have his girlfriend sitting right in front of him. You see your husband’s friend kiss his wife as they move along the road and to you, he’s the best husband on earth;he could be the chief of all sinners and your husband a saint to him.
A guy here will always use his wife’s picture as his profile picture; you won’t even get to see his own face here. But right there on his page are three of his girlfriends. This very randy guy uses that to deceive the poor woman and showers all kinds of praises on her meanwhile, one of the girlfriends on his page is a married woman. Ladies, your pastor may shower those praises on his wife with his girlfriend sitting right on the first row.
I know every woman wants to be celebrated by her man. I know we all love it when our pictures are used as his profile picture. I know we love to be hugged and kissed by him as we walk with friends. But I also know that some men are not good at it and yet they are better than some smart thieves. Just ignore those things that lead to sickness and the end of happiness in your marriage; keep loving and praying for him. With age,he will get tired and come home even if he sleeps with two daily.
Ladies,don’t go to your man’s phone.If you are number one or ten, that’s where you are in his life.Even when he doesn’t ask for it, girls are ready to send nude pictures of fake breasts and buttocks just to have him. If he loves you, they can play all the games with you but you remain the one he truly loves and adores; others are just cheap playthings. All the photos and text messages await you once you develop the itching ears. When eventually you
see them,you will either take a walk or live in perpetual sadness. You see; it’s not worth it.''
Me I'm not a fan of snooping around or stalking my man...cos its the woman that would hurt if she finds out cos most men are prone to cheat
ReplyDeleteAs far as he gives u ur due love,respect,care and attention,u shouldn't even be bothered again buh pray he uses protection out there and do it codedly so u don't find out
I quite agree with you. But it can be tempting most times.
DeleteAll I can say is it's easy for you to stay and dish unwarranted advice until you have been in that situation.
DeleteSome women have found out that their husbands may be infected with some STD by checking his phone to find out he's been sleeping around. Some have found out of their husband's mistresses that way also and may never have found out otherwise. To each his own abeg.
I work with one of the NGO's dealing with HIV, do u know how many men are come and start receiving treatment without their wives, some go to different states to collect drugs. When u ask them ve u told ur wife u ve HIV dey will be saying stupid things like I don't ve sex with her again or I use condom,
DeleteIgnore the are**
DeleteNaija women always desperate to keep a man. Yes do not go fishing for information but please if you see signs of cheating protect yourself abeg. Too many of you coming into my clinic with all sorts of infections. Stella, the numbers are astounding. Married people are my major patients. We compile numbers with other colleagues and this is the case nowadays. These married men checking in for treatment have infected wives o. Abeg you all should please be wise.
ReplyDeleteGod bless u Dayo.
ReplyDeleteMost of them dont know this.
Brox.
Oh Lord!! Well said Dayo. Well said. Wow!!! This write up is the best i ve read since this year. U hit the nail right on the head. I pray some women will learn 4m this. U give ur self HBP cos of nothing. You r his number1 cos he married u. or flunts u. (4 the singles) Plus dnt 4get all men cheat. Pastors inclusive. My mum once tld me"Be very scared when ur husband ve only just "one" gul frd. Cos the chances of her stealing him 4m me is 8. On a scale of 1-10. But when he cheats once in a while with random guls with a condom, my home is safe." now am seeing reasons with my mum. I know my hubby cheats once in a while and he never sleeps out. And he's the best husband and father every liveth*. So dear Ladies, be scared when u r convinced ur spouse ve only"a" gulfrd and not a lot. Plus sneaking around his phones and ipads makes matters worse.
DeleteIt is your kind of mum and u that encourage men to cheat...... Silly advice that makes men think it's their birthright..... Best husband and father my royal arse...... Why won't he cheat when he has a wife and mother inlaw who looks the other way...... Next na awArd una go give am
DeleteGosh this is bull rap, with the kind of mother you have I wonder what your standard for best husband and father ever liveth is.....this is pure victim mentality..... Sweetheart go back and read the bible so you will know what marriage means..... Adultery is not a mans birthright neither is that Gods plan for marriage.... While I don't advocate your fighting your husband it is your right to demand fidelity from him if you also give him.... His fidelity is not doing you a favour....
DeleteDayo Amusa, I wish I could just give u a hug and a kiss ryt nw. I love u #no homo# Well said. U hit d nail on d head. Sumtyms its better not to even check his phone and have peace of mind than checking and getting sad. Its just better to assume all is well even when everytin isn't for d wife's sake so she won't start thinking and have high blood pressure. No matter what, u will still see sumthing dat will depress u. Then y bother. As 4 me, Team no checking my husband's phone. Am too young to start giving myself high blood pressure.
ReplyDeleteI kinda disagree with you, cus its better to have HBP than HIV
DeleteMany marriages have been saved by snoping around, what would you say abt women that found out that their hubby wanted to poison them and bring in another wife, they would have died of poison instead of HBP abi
Or those that find about about even things concerning fertility
The best thing is to check once in a yle and pray for wisdom on how to adress it
Its better to be in the know, the know has saved a lot of lives biliv me
@pushup..u make sense
DeleteI don't support snooping around your hubby's phone, if you want to you should be able to control your words and actions too..
We need God's wisdom and discerning spirit when dealing with one's spouse oo....
What works for me might not work for you! #my sincere opinion
Yes she is right
ReplyDeleteIn this age and era there is nothing like "what you don't know won't harm you"! Hiv/aids is real. This is a bad piece of advice. As a doctor I see innocent infected wives. Worst enough the husbands might have been on treatment without telling the wives.
ReplyDeleteUmmmh......over to the married ones to comment.... I just wonder why women see cheating as normal&r living to accept it&accepting to live with it... D same men cnt withstand an ordinary "babe or dear" another man calls their wives.... Even d bible condemns adultery... That's y i so much luv d western world...giving women their deserved respect and self-esteem.
ReplyDeleteTeeGurl.
matters of the heart.
ReplyDeleteeach to her own. if you feel snooping will make u feel good, by all means do. if u feel it will cause u heartache and a street fighter, please take the advice.
diff folks diff strokes.
*some Nigerian women
ReplyDelete9c one but wat if u ova look another carry goo as dem ur colleagues take become 2nd wife Men need to checked most times 2correct their sense been carried away
ReplyDeleteLow self esteem bull shit. Silly woman doesnt respect or value for herself, conditions her mind that she doesnt deserve fidelity.
ReplyDeleteWell,I agree with all she said except the aspect of not touching his phone. I can't keep my hands off hubby's phones not because I want to catch him or anything like that, noo, far from that.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I just check for new pictures on his phones and if I see anyone I like I transfer to mine, I sometimes use his phone to browse when I don't have data or if I'm saving mine. I sometimes send songs from his phone to mine or vice versa.
So I shouldn't touch his phone because I might see what I didn't bargain for? #yimu.
My husband's phones are my phones so I have every right to touch them and go through them anytime I want. I even pick his calls if it is someone familiar that is calling and he is not closeby. Same goes to him.
In marriage husband and wife are 1 so there shouldn't be all these unnecessary restrictions.
#MyOpinion.
Gbam! You nailed it Genny.
Delete@Genny i love this your comment,that's what marriage and men should be like,i always pray this prayer for you,God bless your home; how is tata?
DeleteLike button clicked*
DeleteThanks Kaycee.
DeleteI wish you the best in all you do.
Tata is doing very fine o.
Gbam........you said it all..
DeleteGenny God bless u jor,my hubbys fone is mine and vice versa too,I use his fone to mkt my bags esp on his bbm,den look at his pictures,pick his calls wen he isn't closeby,reply to his emails,bbm chat wen he is tired. Wetin I dy snoop arnd for,,,. Like u said "in marriage the husband and wife are 1". Kiss ur baby for me
Deleteshe's so right its not even funny. I always tell anyone who cares to listen, don't give your man grief because he can find peace outside and easily too.
ReplyDeleteDont pick his calls, don't read his messages. wetin you dey find? wetin you keep there? you will only open a can of worms, can you deal?
Stay peaceful! allow him be a "MAN". Yes i said it. Only a God fearing man won't do the things you fear your man will or might be doing. If he's doing those things, sorry honey he isn't God fearing so deal with it.
To an extent i agree with you Dayo. Truly when you place tabs on your partner, you are 99% likely to find what you're itching to see, best thing is to avoid it after all what you don't know cannot kill you.
ReplyDeleteOk na when Hiv enter u go know how far
DeleteTo an extent i agree with you Dayo, you're 99% likely to find what you're itching to see in your partner's phone, so it's to avoid after all what you don't know cannot kill you.
ReplyDeleteSpot on, Dayo.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with u Dayo... U just said the bitter truth! ladies una don? Stop giving yourselves high blood pressure by goin thru ur man's fone!!!
ReplyDeleteIhekire Tony
ReplyDeletewhy are women always playing the victim? Most women cheat more than the devil, even when their husband don't.
I have never and I will never cheat on my girlfriend, we even exchange phone, atimes she will be playing games with mine while I will be listening to music with hers. What matters in marriage and in a relationship is understanding and discipline.
Is she married? If she isn't she should kip quiet
ReplyDeleteI guess she's the sidechic she doesn't want the wife/wives to see on hubby's phones.
DeleteLadies,a man'll do whatever u let him get away with.In order to live long for yourself and kids,pls never stop snooping unless he's given u reason to trust him implicitly.
Looooooooooooool @Soledayo
DeleteSoledayo are you a pedophile? What's with your gross profile picture?
DeletePaedophile?No chance,I've to get an adult pussy sufficiently aroused and moist via intensely sensual oral foreplay before she can accomodate my size.You'll agree my chances of being a paedo(YUCK!!!) are like. -0 to 0
DeleteYou are worse than a peadophile you sick pervet.... I pity you and the unfortunate offsprings u will bring to this world.....no single moral legacy to leave them.....shioooor
DeleteI can't begrudge you your opinion however if you're waiting for me to join issues with you about whose offsprings're going to turn out more morally upright,here;grab a seat \__ Might be a long wait as these staff salaries won't pay themselves.
DeleteAll dese pix r of d same guy,try not 2 kee perlzeen.Me n ma gfs read d last erotix story n d nu one on ur blog n we think u an awesum writa 2 ansa ur que$ti•n. Reply our emails xx
Deletethe problem is contacting HIV
ReplyDeleteWell said..!wat u don't know cannot kill u and curiosity kills the cat.lol#sipsMoetnChandon#
ReplyDeleteWell said..!wat u don't know cannot kill u and curiosity kills the cat.lol#sipsMoetnChandon#
ReplyDeleteHmmm
ReplyDeleteActress come dey advice us oh, please i will like to know if this woman is married? Thank God you already know your husband will definitely cheat on you because you and the rest will not leave other people's husbands alone. ( when you get married ) Personally i don't pick my husband's calls, i don't read his texts nor do i go through his phone, that is one thing i don't even know how to do, he doesn't go through mine either.
ReplyDeleteThank you o. All these shameless actresses that sleep around with other people's hubby's and wives. Why won't she expect her hubby would cheat? Because she ll still be cheating while married too! I don't have a huge problem with her opinion, I'm just a little more than a bit based when it comes to artistes or actors giving advice. Generally, their lifestyle is a no no. Remove the log in your eyes first please!
DeleteI don't support keeping off!
ReplyDeletelailai, i make it a point of duty to check once in a while,so far he's not aware am checking.
How do you want to know who to attack with prayers if you don't check?
Abeg i check o, wella sef but one thing is that in cases where i sight unpalatable chats, i stay calm and i don't allow myself to get worried over them.
i simply activate my midnight prayer mode hehehehe
*O God my father i release walls of hatred between my husband and every strange woman*
*Every plan of strange women over my husband, oya scatter by fire!*
it works like magic, when next i check his fone, they don scatter. prayer works wonders.
Lolzz...I feel you dear.
DeleteLolz.
DeleteTrue talk O!. Sometimes I wonder y God created men dis way!. I had a personal Xperience. My former boss, whr I used to work was asking me out a week to is wedding, he even asked me to cum and sleep over @is plce a nite to his wedding and leave in d morning of his wedding to d venue na so fear grip me!,I was then asking myself, na so men useless?As a coy we were all suppose to attend d wedding by force O! I reluctantly went for d reception so it wudnt be as if I v sumffin against him, cos dey gossip a lot in d office. Even while he was sitted beside his wife on d high table, he was busy winking @me and sending pple to me regularly to ask if I nid or want anyfin. Imagine!. I can't be bothered abt men and their ways, I v to live long and anyfin short of long life is a no no for me. Cnt come and kee myself o jare! Becos wen u die, he will still fuck anoda woman on d day of ur burial
ReplyDeleteHahahaha you got me laughing hard dear,don't worry God will bless you with a good man and you will have to pinch your self.years after years whether its a dream or a movie,God bless you.
DeleteShe does have a point,snooping does more harm than good...marriage aint easy mehn!.......lovely lips she has...#i like#
ReplyDeleteI just found out that my husband is dating a married woman, a mother of two. Now he doesn't talk to me, he lives his life like I dont exist. May God be our judge.
ReplyDeleteContinue to pray for him, u never can tell, he might be in dat woman's cage. Pray hard and everything will change for gud. #GOD IS MERCIFUL#
DeleteHmmmmm, but it's sooo tempting sometimes to just reach out n grab his fone.
ReplyDeleteThat's what I keep advising.
ReplyDeleteCheck at ur own peril.
Come to stella and cry me a river.
M-amie is always here to drop her Bible quotes....
Madam Dayo or kilon kpe? Because you have resigned to live an unhappy life of being a side chick do not advice women to accept their position in their men's lives.
ReplyDeleteContrary to popular opinion, not all men are unfaithful and please cut the crap about what you don't know will not hurt you, if a man gives you a reason to doubt him then he's not a man at all! i know marriages that have been based on love and solid trust and they have no issues. Stop giving men reasons to cheat because all you just said is giving them hall passes.
In my own opinion, if a man is not ready to be faithful to his woman he should not expect her to be faithful too! Trust naija women to be extremely discrete! LMAO
Lol, spot on.
DeleteLol...yeah!
DeleteWell said Dayo, snooping around your hubby's stuffs would bring you more tears than joy. Besides, what you don't knw won't kill you.
ReplyDeleteInstead, find ways to make yourself happy and if you can't endure anymore, take a long walk.
God forbid,I can't stay a day without monitoring my mans phone....its not possible....
ReplyDeleteHian! Ne kwa obara mgbali enu. What are u looking for? Better stay in your lane nne. No need
DeleteLolz Julit you won't kill me one day
DeleteLol.@stay in ur lane.
DeleteOne that has been begging me
ReplyDeleteEven agreed to put me in one of their(him n his wife I guess) houses as a tenant so that he will b visiting me there.
The day I went to see him in his office... He went n locked door... Came in n I saw a massive hard on down there... He wrote me a cheque of 300k n was literally crying we shud just fuck there. .. We didn't even discus abt my job tingy he promised.
Dis my job hunting has put me in too many degrading position wit dem randy old married men. Same man in his bb will always put up his wife n b writing how he wud Neva have a life without her.
God I hav been Joseph for a very long time (having to run out from all these old men even tho I need that dia money) all am asking is a good job Biko ;(
One that has been begging me
ReplyDeleteEven agreed to put me in one of their(him n his wife I guess) houses as a tenant so that he will b visiting me there.
The day I went to see him in his office... He went n locked door... Came in n I saw a massive hard on down there... He wrote me a cheque of 300k n was literally crying we shud just fuck there. .. We didn't even discus abt my job tingy he promised.
Dis my job hunting has put me in too many degrading position wit dem randy old married men. Same man in his bb will always put up his wife n b writing how he wud Neva have a life without her.
God I hav been Joseph for a very long time (having to run out from all these old men even tho I need that dia money) all am asking is a good job Biko ;(
Gbam!!I never knew this girl to be so intelligent..Ladies ve u heard?Keep it up.
ReplyDeleteNot Married? Then you have no opinion on this matter. I hate it when people who aren't married advice you on married issues and the married ones that pretend life is so rosy and you always find out that they are suffering more than you.
ReplyDeleteI hope u practice wot u preach when u eventually get married.
ReplyDeleted truth is a bitter pill 2 swallow n mst of us dnt like drugz!
ReplyDeleteIf u want 2 check ur husband's,bf's or fiance's fone,pls DO IT! Afta al two have bcome 1!
If u c msgs or sexy or nude picture of n from women on his fone beta chanj ur church!
Strt praying n fasting in churches like MFM,Garden of Love, et al. Mek sure u add RUN MAD,CONFESS and DIE!
Pls note dat dis solution is 4 ONLY ladies and women dat neva slept with married men!
But if u ve slept with a married man b4 jst rememba dat God cannot b mocked,wat eva a man sows dat he shal reap!
Mamie abeg supply d bible verse mbok
U're on point m'aam.
ReplyDeleteEven though I frown against going tru yr partners fone in a relationship, this piece somehow encourages men 2 cheat on their wives and also give the impression that all men cheat and women shld always expect dt their men would cheat which is not so
ReplyDeleteI disagree with you Dayo. couple's have rights to each others phone. My husband can answer my phone,read my msg when am in the toilet likewise me. Driving around town looking for a man hmmm. that's taking it too far.
ReplyDeletePlease who is Dayo Amusa and why is she giving marriage advice?
ReplyDeleteSo true o. I used to open my husb's fone wen he slips at night and wot I c wil make me cry til morn. I started having dis strong headache. And prayed dat God shld gv me d strength and make me forget it. Den stopped opening his fone. Cos it always make me cry. So I no d name of his gf. Despite all dis he loves me and d kids to d moon. Yesterday was our 10th anniversary, he put up my pix and prayed and appreciated me, till death do us part. He got so many comments and while reading it, I saw dis his gf answer amen wish u d best my boss, hmm mm, men can b so deceitful Sha. I just put dem aside and live my life cos ders nutin in dis world dat wil make u think he's cheating even my frds praise me and say I got d best husband but Na me wear d shoe so I no wer it pinches
ReplyDeleteAnon 11:44AM, gbam. Oya chop kiss. Mwaaah. #nohomo# don't worry, God is ur strength. All men are d same. Dey only differ in deir ability to hide deir decietful ways frm deir wives. Pls just get it off ur mind and do things dat will make u happy. Always consider urself and ur kids first.
DeleteSending you a warm hug*hope it's makes you feel better... He will change hun. You have wisdom please keep building your home.
DeleteHe will change... that's a testimony for sure!
Tanx guys, dis abt d sweetest tin I have heard today. God bless u phrinkies and ivie, and build ur homes too.
DeleteMy dearr it's well! My mother neva snooped cos my dad kept al his fones locked...where's he now 6ft under he had FULL BLOWN AIDS! Pleas we all hve2b wise! And had d aids 4 5yrs plus and was hiding it now he's dead!!
DeleteIt saddens me when I read things like this - especially from women. Society tells us to take bullshit from men, because at the end of the day, he will come back home.
ReplyDeleteIf a man truly loves and respects you, he would not sleep around with other women, whether to your knowledge or not. With the amount of disease out there, a woman is expected to "relax", while her husband is sleeping with multiple women. How does that even make any sense. Yet, when tables are turned, the woman is never given a second chance and is labeled a whore.
Women have feelings as well, and it hurts when we find our partners cheating, yet, we are supposed to fight for them and welcome them back with open arms. Why won't a man cheat when he knows that his woman is helpless and will accept him back.
I just lost respect for this woman. These are the people that we are supposed to look up to. The same people that would claim they are fighting for equal rights for women and women empowerment.
She isn't married and she sleeps with other women's husband. What do u expect from her?
DeleteDon't open ur hubby fone, but once in a while I use 2 steal his fone n read text, I did not see anytin. So I just made up my mind not 2 ever touch his fone again. Peace of mind tinz
ReplyDeleteYeah, it's all well and good to turn a blind eye for the sake of peace of mind.
ReplyDeleteWell, fact is while no woman has any business violating her husband's privacy by going thru his phone records, I don't believe in turning a blind eye.
My eyes are wide open. I observe, I question and I research.
This marriage is till death do us part, and he won't kill me with HBP, lai lai.
Neither will I for the sake of peace close my eyes to any kurukere waka on his part. If his steps are becoming way too 'swag' it's my right as MRS to 'realign' them. GBAM!http://alifediary.wordpress.com/ *
*Lovestories at
This is wisdom! Dayo you are on track
ReplyDeleteI don't check my" Olowo ori's" phone cuz I got no biz with it. Instead he shows me his messages which are quite boring I must say, well except mine. He actually leaves his phone with me, people hardly reach him cuz he sucks at replying people's messages. His parents and family have to call me when they need to reach him. That being said its not by mouth, I commit him in God's hands every second and minutes of the day. May God help all wives nd future wives. Amin
ReplyDeleteDayo ooooo .hw many tyms did I stress ds ur name o.cos for d very first tym.i m actually wt u 100percent on ds one.i m a victim too nd I found out its not worth it.evn if its hard sumtyms.their behaviour just makes u suspect.kisses to u mama D for ds.make we married no gv ourself high b.p all in d name of catchin a cheatin husband o
ReplyDeleteYoung Forever
i agree with her to an extent.....i use to think my hubby was a saint till i started checking his phones and noticed the man is a dog......he claims I am number 1 and nobody can take my place but am irritated why he cannot keep his sorry arse in one place....then he keeps lying that he is single to them.....me i have made up my mind to leave the marriage when i have put some things in place cos i think men are not worth the trouble in this life.....you do all u can to stay faithful yet they think they can run riot all they like.....i know most men cheat but i refuse to stay in a marriage where cheating is a way of life or the man is a serial cheat....if am single again no biggie, anytime congi hold me i go get boyfriend but outside that na me and my children...
ReplyDeleteSame case with me.. Am even tired oh but I v to plan myself well before leaving him and do it wisely!! It is not a must that everywoman must marry or stay married. My happiness doesn't lie in any man or woman biko...
DeleteEse eku atotonu. *applause*
ReplyDeleteThis is an unbeliever's point of view. Marriage was created by God for a higher purpose than all this kiss, hug, sex..these are just the goodies in marriage but not the sole purpose. My advice to any single lady reading this is seek God first.. He will lead you to the one he created for you. Don't seek God because of marriage sha..seek God because He is the most important person to any one.. Marriage is not the beginning or end of life but if you marry the wrong person, you will lose God's plan for you. What is God's plan for marriage? To create an atmosphere where He dwells and where we can grow together unto a perfect man waiting for our bride groom, Jesus.
ReplyDeleteEverything this woman spilled here is crap.. (No offence to her)
Wisdom is profitable! God bless you ! Those who have ears let them hear..a word is enough for the wise!
Deleteshe's kinda right. ladies una hear?
ReplyDeleteTRUE........kudos Dayo*** the problem is that not every woman can do all this; it just God's grace. Wish ladies can help demsefs by saying no to other pipoz property. lolz
ReplyDeleteDayo has wrecked many homes. Am not suprise she is given such advice to women. Dayo pls shut ur mouth. You are nothing but a thief who steals from where she dint sow. The bible says 2 shall become one. And yes I check my hubby's phone and he checks mine too. Sometime he browse with mine while I do same with his sometime so save ur avice for ur daughterr not ne.
ReplyDeleteSo so on point_the best thing woulda been ignoring his phone but once u've started going tru his phone n u keep seeing things,u'll always feel tempted to go tru his phone. Sometimes,it's better to not know buh can we ever underestimate the power of being in the know? Even d Bible said,"My people perish cos of Lack of Knowledge". Do we know how many girls who found out they were wasting their time n moved on to a better guy just by going tru d dude's phone? Sometimes,it's better to just know even if it hurts.
ReplyDeleteI dont care what anyone says, DAYO is not in a position to give advice on marriage or fidelity. Naaaa not you. Ingba ti kon she pe orie buru. Jumping from one married man's bed to another and u now think u can advice their wives not to be vigilant. Abeggy go and get busy,maybe on the threadmill or something,
ReplyDeleteIt amazes me when topics like this come up some peeps start quoting the Bible. Less than 400 years ago the Church refused to have anything to do with marriage! Said it was a sin and a form of prostitution since d woman paid with s*x for her upkeep. It took an Act of Parliament before d church reluctantly agreed to conduct marriage services and even then the married couple had to stand outside the church so they don't 'contaminate' holy ground with their sin! So society has been changing with time. Peeps should behave as if this things have been there from the beginning.
ReplyDeleteIn every post concerning marriage you post this your rubbish. Can you stop already?
DeletePlease voluntarily go back to the psychiatric hospital you were released from..... It's obvious your treatment was not complete..... Abeg I can't shout.....
DeleteShe's very correct, d day I stopped checking my hubby's fone was d day I had peace of mind. I knw he still has cheats but I refuse to die for him to continue having fun even on d day of my burial. I choose to live for me n my kids. I rest my case
ReplyDeleteI won't check my mans phone,but I don't agree with sitting pretty and allowing him cheat,why bother taking vows before God and our loved ones if he does not intend to keep it? The number one advice I give myself all the time is to mind who ï take advice from especially on issues concerning my relationship and it works like magic!
ReplyDeleteYou better chop knuckle! Sensible somebody.
DeleteThanks Jare,your head dey there.
DeleteThat's deep like don't tell me what they said,tell me why they felt comfortable saying it to you
DeleteWomen, you are equipped with a strong intuition use it. Woman, you are not meant to be disrespected by that man! Dayo says he will grow old and come back to you. She is an actress and is mixing up movie life for the real. Please do not be stupid people, if he is cheating...use wisdom to address it. You are not number 1 if he is picking and packing women,around. Do you expect him to use her picture as dp? It is even worse that in public he shouts about his wife but in reality, you are being disrespected. I do not snoop but as a married woman, my senses are very heightened. I did not chase a married man in my single day so I do not condone my husband looking outside. It is not a man thing. It is an indiscipline thing and the person that is supposed to lead me and my children is expected to have some atom of discipline. When I caught my husband cheating multiple times while deceiving me and the general population that I was his world, he lost that spot in my life. I do not make anyone a priority that makes me a very low option. My kid and I are my focus, my God is my husband and my husband is now reaping the fruit of his deceit. I did not keep quiet and God saved me from a disease and an obsessed side chic who wanted me killed. Women this cheating thing can lead to so many dangers. You all better be alert and as someone above said wise up. I am a testimony of God's faithfulness.
ReplyDeleteSorry Ma. The Lord is your strength.
DeleteI should not touch my hubby's phone? So whose phone should I be touching? If a man wants to cheat he will so snooping or no snooping will not make him stop.
ReplyDeleteMind you am not a detective so if I stumble on any incriminating evidence then obviously its either I married a mumu who can't code or he cares less if I catch him abi?
I check my hubby's phone not because I am snooping but cos he always has lots of interesting games, pics & music on his phone so kini big deal? He also plays with my phone & we always pick each other's calls.
True talk dayo. We just have to keep praying for our spouse and learn to trust.
ReplyDeleteRemember: The best relationships are built on trust and shared values.
No matter what kind of a relationship you are in, you can’t go wrong by standing up for these basic relationship rights.
The right to have your own friends, hobbies, downtime and opinions
The right to have your feelings and experiences acknowledged and respected
The right to a sincere apology
The right to be asked not ordered
The right to be trusted not blamed
The right not to be embarrassed by someone you love
The right not to be criticized by someone you love
The right not to be threatened by someone you love
The right to feel safe—and be safe from any kind of harm
For more of this you can join THE WISE WOMAN,its a group designed to educate and encourage couples who are passionate about their marriage.you can have a great and a happpy marriage without waiting for your spouse to change first
Which kind of world do some of you live in. Our mothers dealt with the heartbreak of loose husbands cause they had no choice. Advocate for more groups to raise Godly husbands and stop gathering to advice women to their doom. We have enough Wives Townhall type groups that are destroying women and raising a generation of desperate women. God did not design marriage to be one sided, where the woman does all the work. Thats why it is marriage...it is between TWO. Sorry to offload on you cause you said some valid things but we are tired of these groups. We need more geared towards the African man. Please. God bless you!
DeleteWithout waiting for your spouse to change? Smh...except women change their orientation, we would keep settling for less. How many groups are advocating for men to manage in their marriages? Oh well, i speak from experience and I know the men I attracted when I had that yeye thinking. Some years ago, I raised my standards and if you don't fit, I can't manage. So you shouldn't check phones but you share the most intimate parts of your body. We don't need weak women who will suffer in silence, we need good men who will treat their women like queens!
Delete@ Anonymous4.23.
DeleteI understand what you mean. But u See,in your quest to fix ur marriage,u may encounter some resistance from ur spouse.your spouse may be emmotionally checked-out of the Marriage and not care about your efforts to improve the situation. There is a deep seated believe in our culture that people resist change no matter what.but is this true?do people really want things to remain status quo? If u look closely at human nature,its not change itself. We resist ;its change that is IMPOSED upon us.think about it.we have no problem with change that we initiate ourselves.but when we feel Forced Or manipulated to change,then we resist with all ourmight.your spouse. May not. Be willing to change for the sake of. Your marriage right now,but dat doesn't mean ur spouse doesn't want a great marriage.its becos if they are going to change ,they want the change to be their IDEA! The truth is your spouse wil change when they are. Ready to. The more you push them,nudge them,scream at them ,urge them,the less likely They are to change.I know its hard to wait ,but you just have to let it come From them. The chances are good that you are in the way, you need to get out of the way and create the Space for your spouse to CHOOSE to change.that's the. Only way it wil ever happen. You can be an inspiring example and let your spouse see the choices you are making impact how you feel about yourself and your marriage.resist the urge to believe your marriage won't change until your spouse changes.there is no better way to inspire your spouse to make the choice to change than to make that choice yourself. The bottom line is,you must be the change you want to see. The wise woman builds her home with her HANDs
Shot d fuck up dayo.u ve wrecked many homes.u don't want wives to know what u do with there hubbies out there.u r messed up dayo.u r still sleeping with K1. Ain't u?u r too old for all dis runs.u should be thinking of how to get married so u won't be checking ur hubby's fone as well.u r just razz day. U can't even speak a sentence in english.
ReplyDeleteAs for me, snooping is a no no. If he wants my phone, no biggie. but i'll never ask for his.
ReplyDeleteI'll also sink it into his head that every month,we'll under go blood tests to check for STDs. at least,that will make him play safe (that's if he ever thought of cheating)At least there are HIV test strips. If he refuses, i'll just wait till he falls asleep and prick his thumb for blood.
Oyibo
Lol. Madam. I have been laughing. As in seriously laughing and now I'm shedding tears. This your pricking of thumb comment is funny. Taking his blood sample by force...without his consent... its a criminal offense o. Ok two have become one! Isokay.
DeleteDayo,pls stay your lane.if I don't check myhubby's fone,who will?
ReplyDeleteThis imbecile dayo should forever leave her mouth in the toilet because the stench coming from it is overwhelming. She didn't include the part where she believes that married ladies should also have fun with other men because she knows she'll expose her lifestyle as a single/married woman. Even the women on this thread that have given up on snooping on their cheating husbands know that they are no longer in a marriage but a domestic partnership because of their children. They can't leave with their kids because they know that their husbands will stop being responsible for their children's education and upkeep. So they are basically in prison. She has to stay,ignore and accept all the diseases he brings home and pray till he gets old and finds out that his dick is no longer functioning before he realizes that he has a faithful wife at home...BULLSHIT!!! Even God has given women the liberty to leave the cheating bastard because adultery automatically ends a marriage. So going to God in prayer will never change a cheating man except he changes himself. When I exchange vows with a man, I expect him to keep it, if he can't, he shouldn't have made the vow in the 1st place. He becomes nothing but a selfish,disloyal, disrespectful fraud who does not deserve a decent and God fearing woman in the 1st place. Ladies, be smart oo. And for the single men reading this, if you know you cannot be faithful,then your likes are in the brothels/models. Go and make your selection there. If you deceive any decent lady into marrying you, you will receive God's punishment!!!!
ReplyDeleteThis imbecile dayo should forever leave her mouth in the toilet because the stench coming from it is overwhelming. She didn't include the part where she believes that married ladies should also have fun with other men because she knows she'll expose her lifestyle as a single/married woman. Even the women on this thread that have given up on snooping on their cheating husbands know that they are no longer in a marriage but a domestic partnership because of their children. They can't leave with their kids because they know that their husbands will stop being responsible for their children's education and upkeep. So they are basically in prison. She has to stay,ignore and accept all the diseases he brings home and pray till he gets old and find out that his dick is no longer functioning before he realizes that he has a faithful wife at home...BULLSHIT!!! Even God has given women the liberty to leave the cheating bastard because adultery automatically ends a marriage. So going to God in prayer will never change a cheating man except he changes himself. When I exchange vows with a man, I expect him to keep it, if he can't, he shouldn't have made the vow in the 1st place. He becomes nothing but a selfish,disloyal, disrespectful fraud who does not deserve a decent and God fearing woman in the 1st place. Ladies, be smart oo. And for the single men reading this, if you know you cannot be faithful,then your likes are in the brothels/models. Go and make your selection there. If you deceive any decent lady into marrying you, you will receive God's punishment!!!!
ReplyDeleteSo women should endure and watch him come back with HIV abi? Nonsense. It's either he stays faithful or I take a walk before something wey I no know kills me. Rose
ReplyDeletewith respect,this dayo is a very big fool. but then, wat do u expect from a woan like her? she isnt even married to start with and i know for a fact she dates married men. she is indirectly advising the wives of her married lover to relax their vigilance. note that a woman like dayo will most likely cheat on her husband if she eventualy manages to get married. that being said,if i marry a man expecting him to cheat on me,wat does that say about me as a woman? low self esteem,ready to settle for less than i deserve? i tell my man,the day i catch u cheating...this marriage is over. and he knows i aint joking. with diseases out there and desperate girls ready to do anything to get a man,even kill d wife and u want to expose me to all that just because i agreed to marry u? is there marriage in heaven? it all ends here and i deserve to be respected and treated right in this marriage. dont settle for less,women. its high time we stood upto demand what we deserve from our mates,respect..fidelity...trust and honour. we encourage these men to be undisciplined with post and opinion such as dayo's. but then,he who comes to equity must come with clean hands. naomi.
ReplyDeleteMake una stay there and be encouraging men to cheat....hiv is real o...me I don talk my own..
ReplyDeleteBut the bottom line still remains, "Let God decide "as per marriage. It may sound crazy and *what does God has to do with it?*but marriages no be child's play o, I have never been married but I stay my papa n mama house wetin ma eyes see ma mouth no fit talk o.No marriage is bed of roses but if God knows about it even if it's raining fire, he will be with you.
ReplyDeleteSomeone mentioned that our mothers stayed bt then issues like hiv, aids n all sorts of diseases of such if not our ladies of today wouldn't mind staying too . ladies are independent nowadays so if their men misbehave, they dont think twice...
God should help us all concerning marriage and he lp both men n women alike.
But with God all things are possible and all you ever dreamed of or don't even except He will give you as pluses , shalom!
I am one that loves with everything, my heart, mind, faithfulness, respect but the moment unfaithful sets in , it ends everything.
ReplyDeleteIt's not easy not to trespass (check on d faithfullness)that is if the man gives the space to doubt while it is possible to respect your spouses' privacy if he's a God fearing man, so, it all boils down to the kind of man God gives you.So, if you na won marry ask God specifically what you want. It's not how far but hw well, ask God the way you want him to be marriage shd be btw 2pple being 1 not 2 pple being 2 not someone who will be cheating while u ar d faithful one n when he finally comes home, he will com home to what, dead n lost love or worst even diseases/death ,what's the essence then?
More and more people think marriage is becoming obsolete and that is why there many unhappy couples out there. No amount of wishful thinking is going to change that! People are now talking about 'Open' marriages...Lol. Let's learn to debate the facts not abuses. So cos Dayo is not married she can't give advice on marriage? So what of your Rev father?
ReplyDeleteYou compare Dayo Amusa with a priest called by God? Some of you don't fear God at all!
DeleteGo through your hubby's phones,his BBM chats, his emails if you must, but not with the intention of snooping, don't go fishing for "cheating information", except he gives you a reason to
ReplyDeleteMany men cheat during dating/courtship period, so what makes we think they would stop when married?
ReplyDeleteSome of the women saying they would leave, would you remain celibate or have a lover? And who would be your lover? Singles? Divorcees? Widowers? or Married men?
It is an un-ending circle without a break!
She made valid points. Even without snooping around, a woman's intuition rarely goes wrong.
ReplyDeleteThe men cheat with singles, divorcees, widows and married women! many writing here are sleeping with married men or have done so before they got married!
This is yet another un-ending circle!
Women are catching up fast with the men in this act of infidelity. But the society frowns heavily on the women when caught.
ReplyDeleteMarried women also sleeps with married men.
This is also an un-ending circle!