The daring assertion of a BBC broadcaster is .....
"In Africa, the average woman who is super accomplished as an educated very
successful career woman is either a divorcee or an over aged spinster"
*What is your take on this?
Thursday, January 09, 2014
Successful African Women Have Been Stigmatized?Let's Discuss Oh!
56 comments:
Disclaimer: Comments And Opinions On Any Part Of This Website Are Opinions Of The Blog Commenters Or Anonymous Persons And They Do Not Represent The Opinion Of StellaDimokoKorkus.com
Pictures and culled stories posted on this site are given credit and if a story is yours but credited to the wrong source,Please contact Stelladimokokorkus.com and corrections will be made..
If you have a complaint or a story,Please Contact StellaDimokoKorkus.com Via
Sdimokokorkus@gmail.com
Mobile Phone +4915210724141
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Pigeonholed! Tosh.
ReplyDeleteThe whole of Africa? What parameters were used and where are the figures to back up the claim?
Don't mind them.most of them are feminists. They want to eat their cake and still have it. Their ideologies have ensured that none of them can stay in a marital relationship. Most end up as Lesbians and never married women or have multiple divorces to their name.on a second note Stella,Are there marriages in Naija?
DeleteDesperate old cargos fasting and praying for spouses cos the society Expect them to survive Under a man at all cost.In 70% of the cases,the nigerian men are not marriageable n abusive psychos!
M-amie, grow up abeg! Always feeling funky. Gerraway joor.
DeleteM-amie, I guess you are one of those jobless girls that sit down waiting for a man to provide everything for you. You don't know how women are trying to struggle have a career and keep a home, its not easy handling the two. Only exposed and educated man understand and value such women. Lazy men shy away from them because they don't want to strive harder and they feel these ladies would be a chanllenge and treath to them. Dumb girls like you marry those lazy guys and you people remain contented in your situation forever not trying to achieve more, lazy-ing up and praying for God to bless you. Pls change your mindset, and I hope men change that view too, working ladies are good supportive wives to have.
Delete*whew*, that's all.
I KINDA AGREE
ReplyDeleteMadam stella ur part of does stigmatising 4 referin 2 chika ike dubai shoppin spree as bein sponsored by a sugar daddy. In other words, she cnt v such money 2 do such on her own? Do u v proof of dat allegation? Due to dat ur singular act ur v voiced ur support 4 pple referin 2 every successful lady on d street a runs girl. Stop it! Some ladies really surfer 2 make it in ds so called mans world so its not fair.u r a woman.
DeleteWell I'm saying the same is the case for women in UK.
ReplyDeleteFalse!
ReplyDeleteI ga loads of work to do this morning.
Coming back to make a proper comment
Lepa...me thinks its true.
DeleteClassic example: anyone watch Ngozi Okonjos presentation of the budget and the way the Chairman of the committee kept shutting her up. Guy no even gree am talk.. If na man I'm fit do the same thing?
Our men can't stand ANY successful young lady/woman esp if she is assertive. Next thing them go talk say she be ashewo.
Gbam.....
DeleteTrue...Over Trueee.....you know why?coz they are more desperate and experienced
ReplyDeletePartially True. Bt nt 100percent.
ReplyDeleteSomehow true. Two things about maintaining ur home wen succesful is being with a responsible n reasonable man n the other is being mature n responsible enough to handle situation surrounding u. Such tn nearly hapnd in my family, tnk God my parents are God fearing cos if not for dt, they wld v been separated so many years ago, d pressure was so much from all corners even from useless men that didnt know how d sucess started but today they are just like romeo n julieth.
ReplyDeleteFALSE!!! i know many women including my own mother and sisters who are very educated and successful. look at our female ministers and senators past and present, okonjo iweala, diezani, grace bent, nenadi usman, yabawa wabi and so on. captains of industry and many hard working everyday married women, juggling being a wife, mother and having a career. We have so many accomplished married women.BBC should just stop it already, must these people always insult our sensibilities all the time.
ReplyDeleteMost of d people u mentioned are frm 2nd wife down cos they turned out over aged spinsters.
Delete@ anon 2:25 what do you mean? You are not making sense o!
DeleteOver aged spinsters yes cox our men as usual were scared of their success stories. Most men r cowards wen it comes to mingling or marrying successful babes.
DeleteIt's kinda true but I won't say it's 100% true. I don't know if our men feel inferior when their wife becomes more successful than them leading to divorce or is it that those very successful women are too proud to stay under a man. As for the unmarried ones, I feel men feel intimidated by them that's why they end up unmarried or they feel too big to marry someone below their status.
ReplyDeleteall the housewives will agree to this but its simply not true. in my office all the female bosses are married. they come from all parts of nigeria (i work in abuja) including many northern muslim hausa women
ReplyDeleteIts True but as true as it sounds the same goes for women in Uk as well as across other western and europian countries.
ReplyDeleteBecause most nigerian men(not all) are bullies and are insecure so they wouldnt allow their wives to be free.It is worse in the UK but women are a bit protected,the men dont have choice anyway bcos of all the bills involved so for ladies who are ready,you can be whatever you want
ReplyDeleteYes o i see a lot of them in Nigeria. Very true.
ReplyDeleteAbout 90% true coz really men are a huge hindrance to successful women, they have more time to focus on their work and themselves.Men also have complex issues normally so they find it difficult marrying a woman that's higher than them professionally
ReplyDeleteNot totally true
ReplyDeleteIt's the dirty little secret of the battle for gender equality. It's not that men still don't believe women are equally capable, they just have a hard time visualizing their role in a relationship when the woman outranks them on all the measures they use to gauge their own success. It's a little sad for the men, really. It also makes it very difficult for these successful women to find a husband, so yes it's so true.
ReplyDeleteIts true. Not only in Africa though.
ReplyDeleteVery true, cos na anger dem dey take pursue career
ReplyDeleteTRUE sadly,honestly I think some jobs don't favour a family woman for instance let's take a diplomat,how can she have a family when she is always moving from a country to another also there are some jobs the woman will have to chose between her family and her job/career. But the situation can be alittle bit better if there are understanding men but those men are rare this days.
ReplyDeleteIhekire Tony
ReplyDeleteSuccessful women......mmmmm.....which woman is successful without the help of a man?
See ur life?
DeleteMeaning
DeleteTHIS IS SO TRUE
ReplyDeleteThe broadcaster's head should be checked..... Is Folorunsho Alakija divorced or "aged single"? #FAKENEWSMONGER. What matters is that one is educated and super accomplished, married or not. In case it is true, it means that African men hinders their spouses progress/success......***flipsmyhairandwalksaway***
ReplyDeleteI think alakija is a wrong example because even if she decide to be a housewife she will still make her billions,because of the 'dashed' oil well give examples of people that started from the scratch and worked hard for their money and are very sucessful family women
Deletethis is so not true, we have so many successful African women who are recording/recorded success in their careers and the home front, can't go on mentioning names now
ReplyDeletenot really 50,50
ReplyDeleteThe case seems to be the same all around the world; this isn't ltd to Africa alone, i beg. I think this is usually so because high flying career women tend to have little time for other things. And some men are intimidated by their success
ReplyDeleteThis is very true. An average African man is insecure if his wife/gf is independent. He feels he cannot control her. The ones that decide to marry a working class woman will now stop her from working so that she would be asking him for everything she needs from bath soap to sanitary pad. That way he feels he's in control and can treat her the way he likes. It's a shame. If the woman refuses to stop her work or business it then causes friction in the marriage and other issues will escalate, then divorce. Our men need to be more self confident.
ReplyDeleteAlmost 100 percent true.lemme say why I think so,
ReplyDelete1) Divorced ladies tends to be more flexible with their time. They are not thinking about a spouse neither are they being controlled by one unlike those middle aged women with kids.
2) Over aged spinster was never married and may have started to build her career at an early stage of her llife.Her life is never occupied with how to take of a man happy, shee therefore channels all her energy on doing things that will better her life.
In all, the main culprit here is HUSBAND.
It is possible, but it is also possible that you will find most women, who happily run their homes and still go on to excel in their chosen careers. There are abundant examples, like Ibukun Awosika, 'The Commander' in EFCC legal department and their ilk. I think, it is an African thing, something, you use to brag that you are able to get married, stay married and still achieve personal success outside your home.
ReplyDeleteThe BBC presenter should look to this women,before generalizing. We can have it all, though, by the sweat off our brows.
And, it is to this set of women that the
It is possible, but it is also possible that you will find most women, who happily run their homes and still go on to excel in their chosen careers. There are abundant examples, like Ibukun Awosika, 'The Commander' in EFCC legal department and their ilk. I think, it is an African thing, something, you use to brag that you are able to get married, stay married and still achieve personal success outside your home.
ReplyDeleteThe BBC presenter should look to this women,before generalizing. We can have it all, though, by the sweat off our brows.
And, it is to this set of women that the
Oh puleezzz they shud come off their high horses,bunch of myopic assholes.They wake up on a beautiful day and spew rubbish about Africa,like we still live in d dark age.They shud go take a survey of successful US women then get back to us.
ReplyDeleteAbout as true as saying that in Europe and North America, they would be in their 4th marriage.
ReplyDeleteIt's very true!
ReplyDeleteMany African men are intimidated at successful women cos they feel 'control' which is their most valued possession is difficult with a successful woman!
Some also have a notion dat once a woman is successful,she must have been sleeping her way thru,hence the insecurity they will start displaying!
Its really disheartening
Na so.Even d successful married ones are quickly tagged prostitutes.Becos the black man dsnt believe that a woman who works hard can rise to d peak of her career,whichever one it is without opening her legs!wrong mentality
ReplyDeleteThis is true for professions that require a lot of hard work and dedication to advance e.g. banking. I have a close family member that's in a similar situation and every single woman that's an AGM and above at her bank are divorcees or never married. Rising to such levels at a bank requires a lot of focus and dedication and few Nigerian men can deal with a woman that's too focused on her career.
ReplyDeleteThis isn't necessarily so in professions/trades that have a bit more flexibility or where success is not particularly dependent on hard work e.g. politics, business/trading, government, teaching.
Just my two cents.
Same in the developed countries, just that they are serial marriagers..dey marry or date serially
ReplyDeleteNaah its nt tru atal..stella aint u successful nd still in ur husbands house? As a woman once u dont let ur riches nd wealth get to ur head,trust me u gud to go
ReplyDeleteCheck out www.glowysofiscated.blogspot.com for your shoes nd more
True to some extent.....
ReplyDeleteChiChi, ur comment is sooo true. This is what am facing I̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ my marriage now, my hubby feels †̥ђɑ̤̥̈̊†̥ if I work he can't control me, my dear Iτ̲̅ takess a reasonable ɑ̤̥̈̊Ω̴̩̩̩̥d̶̲̥̅̊ exposed man to encourage D̶̲̥̅̊ wife. I tried explainin †̥ђɑ̤̥̈̊†̥ at least D̶̲̥̅̊ family wil move forward faster but he wants to always be I̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ control wen I beg from A-Z. Am running out of patient just for my kids. But one day Zambia shall be free cos is madness not buyin things I feel I need ɑ̤̥̈̊Ω̴̩̩̩̥d̶̲̥̅̊ helping others.
ReplyDeleteI have seen successful and happily married women. women who get home by 8-9pm and still have time to be sure their kids had dinner and completed their homework, women who wake up at cock crow and go to the kitchen to prepare lunch packs for their husbands to take to work before going to work themselves. The problem is that they are a very small percentage of the "successful women population". most successful and married women are actually not "happily married"... problem is they dedicate so much to their career and have very little left for the home.
ReplyDeletewow...just wow...short of words for you!
ReplyDeleteMamie i agree with you 100%
ReplyDeleteIn our culture unfortunately, a successful woman can only be happily married to a contented and secure man. Otherwise your marriage will be plagued with issues. Men are just too insecure to handle it and I am sorry, if you become a mumu and give up your livelihood to please one man's ego...na you sabi. I am not for divorce but I believe if the man can not handle his wife being successful, let them make arrangements to give the children some kind of stability while he goes off to marry someone that is not as successful as he is.
ReplyDeleteMen say women should leave their status at work. I am sorry, if I am a bank manager, I can not transition from being respected to coming home and being spoken to like a rag doll. These successful women try their best but our men want them to be yes sir'ing them up and down. Please o men, no one can make you feel like "the man". If it is not something you feel then biko go and search somewhere for it.
My long rant to say, it is the insecurity of men that makes life difficult and marriage (not so palatable) for some of these good successful women.
@Everdeen, d women u mentioned are of d 'old generation'. They still have 'submission' as part of their values, unlike nowadays ladies(40 and below), that want 2 raise shoulders with their husbands. When I read Folorunsho Alakija's interview on how she handled her family. I was so shocked. 4 me men and women are equal, but when it comes to husband and wife relationship, the man is the head. #Real
ReplyDeleteNot entirely true
ReplyDelete