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Let me paint a scenario here.
You meet someone and you fall in love...deeply in love.
You love this person so much and would rather die than see them get hurt.
...then you both go for tests and hear the unbelievable news that you are both AS.
AS simply means that the possibility of having sickler children is high...so high that it is better to forget each other and move on.
The problem now is that so many people are willing to catch a grenade for love sake thus birthing babies who get very sick and die...some grow into adults and just when their parents are breathing a sigh of relief that the kids will stay,they die!
My question now...isnt it better to call off the relationship/marriage if you discover your spouse is genotype AS just like you?
Isnt it wicked to willingly bring a child into this world knowing they will be sick for as long as they live?living on drugs and medications?
I am posting this because i just heard a couple had six children and are about to bury the last one after burying all five who were sicklers.
Are you in relationship that you know you should call off?
Please let us discuss this,some people will probably learn from this.
Note that i am not judging any ones decision to love whoever they choose to,i am just wondering why people do this....just wondering.
Why choose love when you know it will hurt you in the long haul?
U can get married and adopt kids if u like, u must sacrifice something in place, either you adopt kids or risk the chance having SS kids.
ReplyDeleteIn the voice of Sdkers, there is nothing God cannot do. Sometimes i wonder if its same pple dat comment here, who says they cant ve only AA kids, with God everything is possible according to ur Christian faith.
Deleteseriously why wud one want to go into a lifelong stress and unhappiness?have u ever seen a sickler during crisis?the pains they undergo and the strain it puts on not just the parents but the whole family?a broken engagement with good reasons isnt forbidden,or is it?
DeleteI can testify to a God-Ordained marriage btw AS couple and dey have 4 children, 3 are AA and d last born is AS....seeking d face of God is not a bad idea!....Also adoption is a way out wen u know u r soo in love, some hospital especially in UK control it....Ma elder bro didn't know his genotype b4 he impregnated his wife of their 1st born, so d 1st is a SS....buh had her in UK all oda kids are AA n AS and its cos they had it controlled!....just be wise people, its wicked to bring in SS to dis world.
DeleteAn uncle of mine had to call off his engagement when he found out that both he and his fiancee were both AS, that was a very good decision.
DeleteYea u love urslvs, but believe me by the time ur kids strt having crisis ud forget about love.
We were trying to assess d level of pain in a woman in crisis,( kz pain is subjective) so we askd her... 'Labour pain and this pain, which is worse?' And she replied: 'this pain'.. U can imagine how severe a pain worse than labour pains would be;
I overheard a little child also in crisis saying 'God, y did u bring me to this world to suffer'. That statement coming from a little child will move God. But God isn't to b blamed, the parents are to b blamed.
I want to plead with every1; don't because of ur selfish reasons go ahead with a marriage contract u know dt dr r high chances of having a Sickle cell anemic child or children... u might strt living a life of regrets asking urslf y u married ur spouse in d 1st place.
Prevention they say is better dn cure
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteSeconded.
DeleteIt depends on the couple, I am As and my hubby is As . We have 3 kids and a happy home. I had one termination when the foetus was 8 and half weeks old. Here in uk they check the genotype at sn early stage. All our kids are As. My hubby stood by me all thru. No family member knew about it until recent. It can be managed here in uk and many other countries. The new technology and medical world makes it possible. Mrs O
DeleteWow!!
DeleteI have heard of it being manageable that is, early termination. To be honest it is a scary thought bringing a child into this world only for the child to go through all that stress that comes with sickle cell. Prevention is better. I have only been in a relationship with 2 guys and prior to the beginning of anything at all they shared their status with me; they were AA. Fast-forward last year, I met someone else.
He was kind, God-fearing, 6ft+ tall (how I like em :D) then boom! What's your genotype O_O Okay because of my past relationships, I never knew mine although, did the test once at some shady looking place so didn't believe that result. I eventually went to somewhere quality and it was AS. I was shaking! Angry the guy had told me he was AS!!
Well, we talked about it, argued but broke it all off even though we had barely started. He said he didn't mind but you know how it goes.
Perhaps, if I were living outside Nigeria I would take that risk not here that the slightest illness kills.
My very long 2cents.
Please visit my links, thank you.
www.myhotlook.com and www.greenpagesng.com
So Mrs O. U n ur hubby killed ur unborn child in d name of technology. May God forgive u.
DeleteShut up you witch! Would you have been there to help them all the nights the child cried in pain! God forgive you for your wickedness
Delete@anon 5:33,you are so stupid for that comment.
Deletebut seriously, I dont see killing an unborn baby as a form of control. marriage btwn 2 AS ppl shld simply b avoided.
DeleteI've been open minded till I read one of the replies. The one who said this "So Mrs O. U n ur hubby killed ur unborn child in d name of technology. May God forgive u"
DeleteYou must be very silly and highly ignorant. SHAME!!
Stella me too I don't understand that kind of love,love is sweet now. But when the challenges comes that love might fade away by then it will be already too late cos you can't change the hands of time
ReplyDeleteNATURELLE OSASERE
Nice topic Stella. I will send this link to a friend. I think she has gone mad. She and her bf found out they are both AS and the guy suggested they break up tho they love each other and they have dated for upto 5years. My friend refused to breakup and went and got pregnant for the guy. She just gave birth to a baby boy and the guy's mum has sworn that they will never marry becos of the AS issue.
DeleteNow my friend and her family are telling every1 who cares to listen that the guys mum is wicked, that she wants to destroy their love bla bla bla.
I,My mum and other good friends of ours have tried to make her see reason but she no wan hear.
She is just 23 and very pretty so I wonder why she feels no other man will love her.
The guy is an only son and his mum has a lot of influence over him.
My question now is, is the guys mother wrong for insisting they shouldn't marry?
I feel it's best to call of the relationship before it is too late. It's better to hurt now and heal later than to bring in kids into this world to suffer. I have an SS friend and I know what she goes through any time she falls sick. She is always telling me she hates her parents for bringing her into this world to suffer. She has not spoken to her parents for some years now becos she is angry with them. Her bf left her when she told him she is SS. SMH...if only people will listen...
Question: is the baby she had for him AS or SS. If not they should sit the boy's momma down and explain to her. If mama still isn't satisfied, your friend should move on biko!
DeleteShe's not wrong but when you're nor in the shoe, don't involve yourself. Everyone needs to leave them alone to make their decision. The mom made her choice and now its her some turn to make his own. Parents guide their children not control!
DeleteWud definitely call off the relationship, tho its gonna hurt but time heals everything.....no parents wants to bury a child after suffering to bring them up.
ReplyDeleteStella, here is 2 tell u I like u and ur blog a lot. Itz been extremely so educative, fun packed and helpful 2 me and a lot of us. May God continue 2 bless u beyond measures. *fat hugs&kisses* #plentyHomo. *rme* *Tongue out
DeleteStella, good morning. Please forgive me in advance if there are any typos in what am about to write. Am just pissed.
ReplyDeleteI logged into facebook this morning and I saw a friend's announcement of her younger brother's passing to glory or death. He had sickle cell anaemia and we all went to the same secondary school together. He was my junior but his sister was my mate(class)
Anyways, to cut the long story short, the guy died o. He was very young, he wasn't even up to 16! Did he fulfil purpose or what cos I don't even know where to start my thinking from.
Now, who do we blame for his death? Na wetin dey vex me pass be that. His parents knew their genotype o cos dey are very much educated yet they went ahead and had children and most of them are siicklers!
Now, why would you as a person all in the name of love bring a child to this world that the child might die? Or what joy do you derive from burying your kids?
Can't you guys just be heartbroken cos you found out you both are AS and move the hell on rada than bring kids into this world to kill dem(yes, dey killed them)
I have a lot of friends who are sicklers and I just dey pity them, sometimes I go vex for their parents and sometimes I just tire.
Abeg, help me beg people, if una genotypeno gree, make una no marry. I have broken like two relationships cos of this whole genotype thing! Abeg, na beg I dey beg. I kneel down dey beg all of una wey wan marry wey una genotype no jam, abeg, stop am. One love!
Now I feel better!
Stelly,an AS that marries an AS most deff hasn't seen a Sickler child before. In the Uni I had this pal called NG. All of us had her mum n nurses's numbers. Y? Just to call them if she starts hving her crisis. Imagine the fear her mum lives thru everyday n imagine how her heart leaps wheneva her phone rings. I hv a coz that has 3kids ,2boys n a girls. Both boys are SS. One died in his 2nd Year in Uniben,the oda one is thru wit his NYSC. A rich guy here has 3kids,the 1st two are SS n d last is not. Love DOESN'T conquer all in this regard but if u want to live all ur life in PAIN,GUILT,REMORSE and SHAME,then marry an SS but otherwise,DON'T.
ReplyDeleteMy dear u never knw some ppl o, I knw of a girl whose younger sister is a sickler , she's AS nd she got married to an AS guy there's notin ppl didn't do to discourage her , but I just said if she couldn't learn from wat her sister is going thru maybe she wld learn from her own child.
DeleteAA can marry SS (just dat they can only produce AS which is ok) but AS can't marry AS (can produce AA, AS, SS) cos there is risk of producing SS. Also AA can marry AS (can produce AA and AS only)
DeleteWetin person no go hear finish?
DeleteI'd like to hear more of this kind of story aunty Irene............*SighS*
Pisses me off! Y would u bring a child to this world when u know the child might die. I don't get it! I have met two wonderful guys and later got to know dat dey were AS! O boy, I edn d relationship sharply! Now, am with my own special gift from God-my hubby of life. It was rily hard then to let go but am glad I did and am in a better position. Abeg, if u r AS and yr partner is AS, don't apply faith! Run! Run! Run.
ReplyDeletewhty? what is your definition of faith then? is faith something to be selected. Abegi!
DeleteIt is really funny. You love someone, you don't want to suffer heart break so you guys get married irrespective of the fact that you know about your genotype. Start birthing sickle cell anaemia kids and start suffering this same heartbreak that you were avoiding when you decided to damn the consequences and get married. It is even more painful burying ones child than burying the love between each other. I just dont get it. In this day and age when people are enlightened, we shouldn't even be hearing of these things. Please if you are in such relationship, call it off now and walk. PLEASE pity the kids that will be born. I know there are actually rare cases like my mums friend whose husband and her are A.S, 3 of their kids are A.S and the last is A.A but do you really want to go through that trauma? It can be forgiven when there was no exposure but now, Ignorance isnt an excuse. Please!
ReplyDeleteStelz i knw of a couple dat r both AS dey hav 3kids. 1 AA, 1AS & d last is SS. Dey regret havin ha cos shiz alws sick.if only dey knew. Dey've spnt so much on ha already in 2yrs .. Ds genotype thing is a thing of luck depending on d angle it strts. I ws taught in sec sch bur cnt remembr aw dey calculate it again jare.bur i knw dt if d 2 A's pair 1st, AS follows den SS. it's advisable to stop wit child bearing aftr d AS cos d risk is dat d 3rd or 4th will def be an SS.bur in all its Luck! Some myt strt wit havin 2 SS b4 AS &AA. Pls pardon me jare i cnt remembr d calculatn vividly. Ask ur doc to xplain beter if confused. Lolz.. bur as for me am AS & i cnt risk marrying an AS though.. I no gt power to dey sleep for church or hospital every second of my life. I cnt evn imagine the frustration!.
ReplyDeleteThere is no calculation my dear...all d risk apply to each n every single pregnancy...for every single one, der is a 25% chance of AA, a 50% chance of AS and a 25% chance of SS. u might be lucky to av all AA, AS, or unfortunately all SS.
DeleteThe outcome of each pregnancy has no relation to the preceding one or the subsequent one.
My Aunt has one SS kid and 3 maybe AS. I had a friend in sec sch, all four of dem SS.
My sweet cousin is AS, was in a relationship wt a girl who is AS bt dey broke up wen dey found out abt der genotype. The babe lost her two SS brothers, so sad.
Presently I have a cousin in dis situation, I don't even knw where to start counselling her from cos dey alredy stereotyped me for my house as I be doctor na...dey say I only agree to things dt are medically proven. I really hope she changes her mind cos d longer she stays in d relationship, d more d likelihood of sorry days in future. Pls let us be wise. Have mercy on d unborn kids.
Thanks Doc!
DeleteThanks Doc!
DeleteHey, i am kind of in the same situation atm. I think the couple can do genetic marking( check the genotype of the pregnancy and remove it if the child is a sickler) I know it's a sin... but what if you dnt meet a person with AA genotype that you love, is it better to be in a loveless relationship. Am actually really confused, my family isn't in support at all. I know it's wrong as well but I am yet to meet someone wt AA genotype that I love and currently I am dating someone who is AS and I am not AA. We love each other, we hv tried to break it off severally but still end up wt each other. My question is, what if I dnt meet someone wt AA genotype, how long will I continue to wait??? When there is someone here that I hv feelings for. What is even the chance that I will meet an AA person. I met another guy who says he likes me but after talking a bit, i discovered he is also AS. My ex had AA genotype but we had so many problems!!! I tried to love him, i really did but the feelings weren't just there...i finally called it off after a couple of years but I realised that I could not imagine myself married to him. please is genetic marking that bad???? My mum is saying what if all my pregnancies are now SS, how many will I remove, she also says how fertile do I know that I am sef, how many pregnancies do I know that God has destined for me to have that I will just be removing them as I please. I am honestly confused. Forgive my typos please!!!
ReplyDeletelet me ask you this, if the risk was that you could infect each other with sickle cell and not that you would have ss children, would you go ahead?i think is unfair is risking an innocent child's life. why bring someoneone into the world to suffer. you mum also has a very valid point, what if you keep having ss foetuses? how many are you willing to "take out"? what if you are destined to have only 1 child? I believe you do not have anyone close to you who is ss or you wouldnt even be considering this. i am married to one, i love her like mad but i see what she goes through.
DeleteSweetheart, I know its hard but u need to walk away from dat relationship. Yr mum is very correct. How many children are u gonna kill before d non 'ss' child stays. Please just move away. Be heartbroken for now rada dan being heartbroken for life when u birth sick children. Av been in your shoes before, I cried, was angry, was pained. But today, I thank God. Please sweetheart, don't marry dat guy. Xoxo
DeleteBabes flee, u r d only one limiting urself. If u leave him, u wl get a guy who is AA, der r more ppl who r AA than ppl who r AS and SS combined. Be nice to urself n to ur old age. Prevention is better than cure. Frustration will not be ur portion IJN.
DeleteMake that decision now, u will be glad u did.
Well then adopt! That would save you a lot of future heart ache and the sin of have an abortion.
DeleteHello anon.9.48.....
DeleteGenetic marking sounds simple and logical. But before you decide to go into it, talk to women that have had miscarriages and see the pain they feel. Talk much more of you intentionally aborting your baby each time you find out its SS. What if the first 3 or 4 are SS? Are you sure you can handle that kind of emotional torture?
If you insist on marrying your AS lover, then please do it only for the first and most important reason for marriage, COMPANIONSHIP. Please do not bring a sickle cell child into this wicked world.
except ur ready to adopt or abort any child u find out is SS, there are so many AA out there, take it easy u wld learn to love another
DeleteWetin person no go hear finish?
DeleteCVS or pre-implantation can solve your problem. It's done in Nigeria but quite difficult. If you aren't in the medical line, stop talking. Don't make people do things cos you feel it's right. AS couples have a choice, they can test the fetus to know the genotype and decide to terminate if infected. Or they can simply pay more and do a pre-implant where the eggs are checked first and inpanted into the woman just like IVF. So there is a way. It's difficult to love sometimes, marry a demon cos he/she is AA and maybe end up loosing your life? If you have an AS problem, consult your doctor or visit a fetal diagnosis center to ask for advices. You can be lucky. My parents are both AS and have 9 Kids. None of us is SS. We AA or AS. They married in the 70s. So now we know better and have better technology. Let's keep learning. Someday there might be a cure for sickle cell. A better cure than bone marrow transplant.
DeleteBest comment so far. Am in the situation now and for a lady that has never been lucky in love to eventually find someone I can't do without and find out he is AS. Have been doing so many research on this and your comment just helped. Thank you
DeleteWell, this is not easy to discuss. The choice rest on the people involved. You love someone, I mean LOVE not infatuation, that love that you can only feel for one person the whole of your life,(not many people, even married ones have experienced this type of love). The love that can make you lay your life down for your lover to live, if you have not experience this love then you may not understand. When you have this love and you both have the AS genotype, sit down and ask yourself what is best for you. Marry and adopt kids or call off the relationship and have healthy kids, it all depends on what you think of marriage. Marriage is not all about having kids, they are gift from God, you DON'T EXPECT A GIFT RATHER YOU ACCEPT A GIFT. I am 100% against knowling bringing out SS kids to the world to suffer and die but if you can't bear to leave your love, marry and decide not to have kids or marry and adopt kids. Let us not tempt God. Be enlightened don't just because of kids be in a relationship that the love is not strong and don't just because of love kill your gifts from God. It all depends on the people involve. Believe, never make the mistake of agreeing to take chances with AS and AS and never loose your true love, you can never be happy. You can only love once genuinely, others are affection, passion, appreciation or infatuation.Think about it.
ReplyDeletetrue words
DeleteThere's no hard or fast rule to all of this. It's easier to advice people on what 2 do when u ain't in their shoes. I'm SS and I can tell u I'm healthy, the last time I fell sick was Feb 2013. But the few times it comes, I see different worlds. Although, I can't say the same for my two other siblings (we are all SS) but God has been faithful. All I can say is use ur heads. All the best o
DeleteLook at this scenerio, both parties meet, fall in love, check their genotypes in a laboratory in nigeria, are told one person is AS and the other AA. Both are happy at this news and get married. Somewhere along the line, the AA spouse is in Paris and goes for a surgery and while checking blood for surgery procedures was told he is AS. Tell me what do you expect them to do. These cases abound you know. How will this be handled?
ReplyDeleteIs tricky as I know a couple in a similar situation the lab here in Naija confirm dat they are Aa and AS but along d line in d process fertility treatments in their 8th year the discover that both are AS but thank God for IVF they have 4kids and God intervened and none is sickeler
DeleteMy dear nigeria medical system is nothing to write home about. Can u imagine our last born dt we checkd her genotype wen she was a baby found out she is AA, in primary sch we checkd again same AA now she is 18 she fell sick last year jan wen she went to stay wit my sis in lag only for d doc to say she is SS I was shocked to my bone marrow cudnt believe my ear. All of us in our house re AA. I cnt tell wr d mistake is now cumin from
DeleteHmmm @ anon 11.03am, I think your mama can answer this question. Don't just blame the medical system cos pple still de use the same naija med system check out the genotype. The question and answer lies with your mama.
DeleteWhich kind love b dat 1 abeg make them seperate joor is wrong to bring a child that will surfer b4 he die is so bad as 4 me I can't o anyway tank GOD am AA I have notin to worry about
ReplyDeleteI grew up with 2 sis siblings, I know the pain of having a crisis and the other effects. My candid advice, pls don't try it unless God says go ahead. The pain is not only on the parents, the pain is unimaginable,a beg
ReplyDeletethere is nothing God cannot do. My sister is AS and also her husband. they warned them about getting married. my sister wanted to call of the wedding, but her husband refused, pleaded with my sister to marry him, cos he knows the God he serves. i called the stupid then. they have 3 kids now. 2 boys and a girl and they kids are all AS. and they are so happy. they have stopped having kids. i know its risky,i wont even advise anyone to do it
ReplyDeleteHi Stella, though it could be difficult parting ways realizing you are in a relationship that might not be healthy for your unborn children. Was in a relationship for 7years and so much in love with my lady. I was graduating when I met her as a Jambite. We were together waxing stronger day by day until she graduated. At that period, marriage was inevitable but to our dismay, we went for genotype test only to discover we were both of AS genotype.
ReplyDeleteWe struggled over it for another year but we had to go our separate ways to protect the future. She's happily married and I am too. And we are still friends till this day. Do not be stupid for love because love hurts too when you act stupidly.
Whn I ws serving my father land I dated dis corper doctor and we were head over heels(in love) with eachoda.I was already feeling like a wife bt reality hit me whn we bth discovered we were A S. I cryed and cryed and thought I will die if I loose him.Bt mehn life goes on oooo.I cnt use my 2day in spoillin my 2mro.My kids will neva 4gve me cos I ws informed/educated.It wsnt dt I ws an illiterate.So pls AS +AS isn't love.truth b tld. EDO DOLLL
ReplyDelete*cried and cried* , *lose him*
DeleteHi everyone.Sickle Cell Anaemia is a very sensitive topic.It's a pity though that innocent kids are involved but if by any chance you get to know please I beg of you, let go.It is very difficult though but it is better and best that way.
ReplyDeleteThere are those generations like those before us who didn't know that there are possibilities of having sick children in the future if they ever got married.
My parents are both carriers and so am I our last child is the only one with the ailment.When my mom had her a month or a couple later she started visiting almost every other month but at the end we understood what it was all about,so,she has SS anaemia.
Which brough me back to years back, we lost 2 other children in Nigeria,then we though it was someone who killed them,they just got sick a little and that was it.Then we didn't know and Nigeria's health care was not much to write home about ,infact my mom told me they didn't do autopsy be4 the kids were buried.
To cut the long story short, prevention they say is better than cure, never open your eyes till dirt fill it up.The trauma for the kid is nothing to write home about ,you don't fell their pains but you can see it,it's an horrible experience.
Except God wants to glorify Himself in your case and He directs you to go on with the marriage, pls don't attempt marrying an AS(the sickle cell carrier) like you are...
We have been praying and believing in God and I must testify the last time my sister visited the hospital was early Feb.,last year, a place she goes at least 5 or six times a year and stays 10days to a month or two at a go.
I am a carrier and I must marry a non carrier of the abnormal blood cell (AA) because of the possibility of having sick children. Though with the help of drugs and taken precautions and then google the sickness and you will know it is a sickness one can live with if ever one finds oneself in that situation.
Nwanne na dem kill them. They just take love turn am to lust come dey kill innocent pikins dem. The torture dis pikins dey receive wen dem get dia crisis pass dat of aluu4 and ejigbo3 join . Read they nofit read well for school na so so cry dem dey cry sake of say pain. Wetin dey pain me pass be say THESE SS VICTIMS DEY VERY INTELLIGENT. E get one small boy wey dey my pikins dem school,em be ss if you look am, other children go dey play dey do janglover( swing) em go stay one conner dey view them. MAKE I ASK; DIS ONE NA LIFE? MAKE UNA ANSWER. God go punish any AS man and AS woman wey dey in love to marry IN JESUS NAME AMEN. These SS children wen dem grow to be useful they just die.WHAT A PREVENTABLE STUPIDITY . Stella postukwa biko iwe di m n' obi RIGHT NAW
ReplyDeleteI knw dis is a very sensitive topic buh u jst got me laughin hystrically.well said jare.kids shuldnt b brought into dis world to suffer.
DeleteLmao... you got me laughing hard. You're correct. For me, growing up wasn't painful and yes I grew up in Naija. Infact, I didn't know my status till I got into Uni and ironically, while in secondary school I used to take care of my very sick friend. Apart from the health care system Dumbo is talking about, the truth is that parents do not know what is expected of them. There are basic things they should know like simple diets, supplements, herbs name it. But because we are "Godly" people we think God would come down n help. Yes my parents brought me 2 this world as SS but I don't hate them. The deed has been done. Life has been good to me n if I don't tell you you won't know I'm SS. I'll be 25 this year and I'm not dying soon my God's grace. Sickle Cell Anaemia isn't a life sentence!
DeletePlease people need to be educated about this stuff. When two AS marry, it means that for every child they have, there's a 25% chance that it will be AA, 25% chance it will be SS and 50% chance it will be AS. Its a probability thing so what if all the children decide to go in the 25% chance if SS at every point? Its not that 1st born will be AA, second AS, third AS with the fourth being SS like some people believe. Please I'm a doctor and it cannot be OVEREMPHASIZED do not get married if you're both AS....you do not want to have your child tell you ' mummy why did you bring me into this world to die?' And my dear, that love you're screaming about now will just fly away when you have to bury more than one of your kids. And I believe mutual respect, understanding, trust and maturity is what makes a marriage not all these 'I love u' abeg.. That said, the choice still remains yours. Have a nice day everyone. And Stella, thank you for this important topic. God bless you...
ReplyDeleteAnd you claim to be a doctor. My brother is in his mid thirties and is SS. Being SS is not a freaking death sentence. It is the useless Nigerian health care system that gives them a life sentence. How many Sickle cell related deaths do you hear about in the UK OR US? This is because they carry out research and know how to manage the illness. You guys need to wake up! The whole purpose of marriage is not just to bear kids, DUMBO!
DeleteWHICH IS WHY U R THE REAL DUMBO! WHITE PEOPLE DONT GET SICKLE CELL!!!!!
DeleteHey! Take it easy. Every SS person can't find themselves in the UK and US. Your brother being 30 something yrs and alive, Thanks be to God for the healthcare system wherever he is. But you still sound like someone that has witnessed something painful in your brother. That is what we are talking about. I still maintain, AS and AS to go their separate ways IF you have the intention of having babies not just marrying for collabo sake alone. A word is enuf for the wise, mehn!
DeleteWell my Doctor friend, please educate them more about CVS and IVF and stop giving them the no no and death sentence. Let them know of options. Unless you don't know of CVS and IVF of which I will advice you educate yourself more doctor. Thank you.
DeleteWhy bring a child to this world to suffer....Love Gbakwaaoku...
ReplyDeleteI'm AS and I can't imAgine myself getting married to an AS. I've broken a relationship cos the guy is an AS. I don't think its a nice thing to do. Bringing a child to this world to suffer? Oh no. Some are very lucky while some are not. So its better to be on the safer side.
ReplyDeleteBoth parents mi nd bro *AS*.... Wnt advice it thou....that thing called crisis is nt smfin u want ur enemy to xperience...nba...funny tin is I heard its an african thingy...whites dnt av d As nd SS shit...
ReplyDeleteI don't advice it!
ReplyDeleteI dated my ex for 4yrs and just few months to our wedding, we discovered that we were both AS. It was really devastating, after much painful thoughts, we had to face reality we both agreed to call the wedding off. It was not easy at all. Infact those days were the most painful times of my life.
Its been 5yrs now, and I'm married to a beautidul woman. But not a day goes by that I don't miss her. But then it was worth the sacrifies
hummm... reminds me of my immediate sis
ReplyDeletesleep on dearly beloved sis Adetola
i will say my parents were "lucky"
they took this risk of life, both were AS, they got married and it resulted to
3 AAs, 2 ASs and 1 SS who has since passed onto glory
i am AS and i made sure my husband tested his genotype before we got married, he is AA
growing up wiv an SS wasn't easy at all cos we are all practically sick once she falls sick
i pitied her cos she's the only one out of 6, the pain, daily drugs, bone issues, monthly crisis etc
i also pitied my mum cos of the trauma, fear and sleepless nights that comes with every crisis
she passed on at the age of 21 when we actually thought she had outgrown the crisis and she wasnt even sick ...she had recovered only for her to relapse and within the twinkling of an eye she passed
I wouldn't advise two AS to take the risk cos it's not gonna be easy bringing up a sickler
you are practically in and out of hospital.
please think, think and think again before you take that step
They could get married, if they are ready to adopt kids or get a surrogate father or mother. True love is hard to let go! Save d Love wasn't true in d 1st place...
ReplyDelete#doctorbobby
Thank you for your sensible advice.
DeleteA lady of marriage-able age (frm let's say 16yrs) who does not knw her genotype before hand needs to have her head checked o. I don't believe luv is blind. If u r AS n he is AS n u guys still go ahead t marry n hav kids then u guys r not only stupid but heartless- How dare u bring kids into ds world who will battle sickle all thru dier lives on earth. Mschew!
ReplyDeleteLadies take charge of ur r\ships, 3 months afta u meet a guy make sure u r certain of his genotype. If it will not complement urs, kindly MOVE ON. A broken r\ship is better than a broken marriage.
Thank you dear. I've been reading the posts and wondering why people that know they are AS waited till they are so in love to find out the other person's genotype. I am AS and honestly from the age of 18 or so, before a relationship gets serious, I stylishly ask you your genotype.
DeleteUnless they fall in love the first day of meeting. Oshisco Abeg there is no excuse for such torture. Do not put your God to the test in the name of love. I don't blame our parents of old cos such things were not known to them. But now, anyone that tries this nonsense suppse collect utali. Unless its all these random knackings that produce. But even at that, educate urself and help these kids.
DeletePlease don't marry each other please, think of how you will feel when you start burying your own children.
ReplyDeleteTo me, love is a such a wayyy overrated word, yes i said it! Nobody should use love as an excuse to act foolish mbok.
ReplyDeleteWord!!!!! someone hs finally sed my mind. wats dis whole luv fin? Abeg let me hear word. luv is a lame excuse for bringing a child into a world of constant pain nd probably death.
DeleteIf you ask me, its better for both lovers aka SS carriers to path ways....difficult as it may be, its the best .why? They will not live happily ever after.... watching their kids die.
ReplyDelete*part
DeleteYeah AS and AS can marry that is if they are loaded, they can select their baby...
ReplyDeleteNah! I cnt deal. Eve E Ume
ReplyDeleteLove is not enough reason to bring an innocent child to the world to suffer then die on the long run. Secondly, if your faith is not strong enough to proceed with an AS partner, please, do not take the risk. Miracles do happen. Yes, I know that but, not everybody experience such miracles.
ReplyDeleteBE WISE!!!
Anon 9:48 you are so right, such happens because it happened to me. My parents were told in nigeria when they had me that I was AA. I never had cause to check on my own as I grew up, even when I moved to uk at the age of 14...I was hardly sick. I met my hubby who is AS and had asked me what my genotype was, I was quick to tell him I'm AA. The rude shock came when I was pregnant with my daughter, as part of a routine check, i was told I was AS. I argued and made them repeat the test 4 times, alas it was so. So mistakes happen, I thank God that my daughter and now my baby son are As, BUT I dont plan to test fate again ooooo, I've closed the baby making shop and I'm just thanking God for his mercies on both children.
ReplyDeleteI have never supported knowingly bringing a sickler into this world under the umbrella of love.
Same thing happened to me. Always thought I was AA until I moved to the US got married then got tested found out hubby & I are AS. We decided to keep it between ourselves due to NIgerians judgemental nature. I wouldn't have changed my mind or made another decision either way if I had found out earlier. Technology has paved the way. I won't bring a sickle cell child into this world. I know a lot of people have had bad experiences due to health care in Nigeria.
DeleteWhat procedure did you go for. CVS or IVF?
DeleteBy the time you want to marry because of love regardless of the blood incompatibility, you end up having sick children that wil cause a lot of pain in the marriage and then you end up hating yourselves. My beat friend got pregnant for her boyfriend and then found out that he was AS. She immediately aborted the baby and they broke up. Now they are happily married to other people. It was hard, but I respected her bravery which saved her from future heart ache
ReplyDeleteA friend of mine and her boo AS/AS she decided to move on after we all advice her and gave her reasons y it won't work but dia prophet in church insist dat there is nothing God cannot do (Yaah I know) dey went ahead with d wedding a year after she gave birth she became mad, d husband abandoned her including d same prophet. wen d devil give u A he d devil will collect b to z from u! D baby is safe though but with a mad mum and her madness no be here,God show her a lot of signs dat d wedding wont work but she still went ahead even d mother inlaw wasn't in support...
ReplyDeleteShe may be suffering from post partum depression . If she can receive help , she may be ok someday. Rose
DeleteLove is not enough reason to bring an innocent child to the world to suffer then die on the long run. Secondly, if your faith is not strong enough to proceed with an AS partner, please, do not take the risk. Miracles do happen. Yes, I know that but, not everybody experience such miracles.
ReplyDeleteBE WISE!!!
Sometimes you have to look beyond LOVE....if u bring in a child wf sickle cell anaemia into the world,u just brot the child to suffer...The parents no go rest,the child too no go rest....And eventually after the struggle the child would still die...Such Love would js bring sufferings so I think both couple should save themselves the headache and end such R/ship on time.....I'm As and I don't think there's any kinda love that would make me marry an As guy
ReplyDeleteYou are an ignorant idiot! You think Sickle cell is a death sentence?STFU! Most of them will probably outlive you. Go get a fucking education! It is your useless country's moribund health system that ensure they die, else it can be adequately managed. Now go get yourself a fucking eduction- death belongs to us all. DUMBO!
DeleteYou this dumbo man abi woman. Your brother alive is by the grace of God n the healthcare system of where he is. Pls carry ur pains and go nurse it somewhere else biko. We hv a useless system and you are still sounding so pained on top our matter. Pls this ranting here is not the best way to deal with your hurt, biko.
DeleteWhat's your problem? Its her choice not to deal with SS issues so let people be. If that's what you are, am sorry and its never easy dating an SS person or even marrying them. I dated one and it was very overwhelming. I won't wish the disease on anyone. You keep justifying it by living abroad, not everyone has such oppourtunity and finaces to take care of a sickler. Am sorry of its harsh but truth is that prevention is better. Am AA and won't even marry an AS person. Dont want my kids to be faced with the difficult choice of who to marry cos genotype.
DeleteSo calm down. People are entitled to their own choice.
As for me, I don't see anything bad in marrying AS genotypes, love is just too powerful to let go when its true, science has realy improved and there's genetic marketing or whatever its called that allowed the genotype of the baby to be known and can be terminated, marriage in not for child bearing, its for emotional support and satisfaction, what of those who have AA husband that beats them, life is not a bed of roses, u can't always have evrytin u want everytime u want it, though I have to check what genotype I am and that of my lady immediately but it won't stop my love for her even if we r both AS, if I dnt have her then I don't want any1 else! Unbelievable but true
ReplyDeleteGenetic marketing ko, genetic advertising ni. If you weren't sure why not ask Google b4 coming here?
DeleteThe Love you have for each other becomes the trauma U̶̲̥̅̊ face at the long haul. Why marry an AS when U̶̲̥̅̊ know U̶̲̥̅̊ α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ also an AS. When crisis sets in all the love that once existed goes down the drain and then U̶̲̥̅̊ are left wt the Had I known saying. Best advice,, Never venture into a business D̶̲̥̅̊ɑ̤̥̈̊†̥ it is likely U̶̲̥̅̊ know the END from the BEGININNING. A broken heart that heals with time is better than a life filled wt Crisis, heartbreaks, Insecurity, an ultimate knowledge knowing D̶̲̥̅̊ɑ̤̥̈̊†̥ U̶̲̥̅̊ might likely bury ♈ōϋя own child someday. Not everybody has the faith that can stand the test of tym. Better to move on and av a secured Future rather than be in a life filled with Crisis. My candid believe is that True love cannot stand the test of time in this situation.
ReplyDeleteIts very risky. As a teacher, I have seen,cried for stuents who are SS and wnt advice anyone to go into it. U cnt get angry with dem. Thy fall ill more than half of the term. U cnt stress dem. Love can hardly beat dis. Its different looking fr kids. Unlike dis where u have d kids,watch their personality evolve, fall so deep in love and thy die. Didn't we just see fani kayode's son in law die during vacation?dnt get married. Its very painful even fr those close to dem. Its painful watching dem. I had a colleague that was SS and hated herself especially whn she had that wound thy usually have dat doesn't heal. She cried and cursed her mother out why she gv birth to her to suffer. D best thing is: if u're dating, casually ask the genotype on the first date so u wnt be deep in love b4 finding out. Or if u're rich,u cn get married and do IVF with PGD so thy can only implant the good embryos and remove the SS. That's if u cn afford it. U mk good use of wht technology has to offer if u're so deep in love. Prof Ashiru does it @ MEDART Lagos. But never bring an innocent child to suffer for nothin. I taught an SS boy and after sm one on one classes, sm dayz I cry when I leave him. I cry so hard. Cos he's always missing classes, falling ill,goin fr checkups. Is that what u wnt to knowingly put a child thru? U'll hate urself cos d child will hate himself and hate u when he's in pain.
ReplyDeleteExcuse me, pls which wound do we have that doesn't heal? And which ones are the good embryos, which one are the bad ones? Your ignorance ehn! I find this comment really offensive. Come back and comment here n i'll teach you the things you need to know about us before you talk. Teacher my ass!
DeleteIndeed there are good embryos. Sorry if you are SS. The teacher made a point though. One can either do IVF or CVS. Depending on your pocket.
DeleteAunty Stella, it is not restricted to AS only, even AC must not marry,I repeat must not marry AS or AC. Any love feeling must wear recommended goggle o,not shakomended. Am AC n hv ended relationships cos my of status. A day of tears is better tears of a lifetime. So cry today(now) n laugh for the rest of your days. Yes many will say one can select d babies once u preg., u test n if d babies genotype is not wat u wnt,u remove,pls how many u wan remove?hw many go remain? Even d effect of d test on d baby even wen d genotype is ok is anoda tin, miscarriage is high! So no guaranty. Remember in every pregnancy,it is 1 out of 4 chances. So 4 d sake of greater love n peace, any AC or AS shud be patient 4 AA. And if your faith carry, get "healed,transformed" by God b4 seeking 4 any serious relationship. Coz e no easy 4 SS to find mate oo. I knw a guy who is 36yrs, SS wey babes run frm say they don't want to b widows too early in their lives. May God help us. (Sori 4 ny typo error). LOVE MUST WEAR RECOMMENDED GOGGLES, so help us God.
ReplyDeletei tot Ac was kinda close to AA. AC can marry AS. please find out well cos u r about to break my heart.
Deletei tot Ac was kinda close to AA. AC can marry AS. please find out well cos u r about to break my heart.
DeleteSorry my love. But its d truth. A colleague of mine parted with the girlfriend cos he was AC n she was AS. It ws actually d first tym I ws hearing d AC type.
DeleteI'm AC And my hubby's genotype is AS, and at my recent antenatal booking sessions, I and my partner were tested for sickle cell, Thalassaemia and similar inherited unusual red blood cells, and days later the results indicated that the baby can inherit : hbAA- normal genotype (25)%
DeleteHbAs- sickle cell carrier (25)%
HbAc- haemoglobin C carrier (25)%
HbSc- Sickle cell disease (25)%
And the chance is with each and every pregnancy........ So in this case, one can only pray and hope for the best. And of course, we would have parted ways if we were both AS cuz we know the risks involved.
Ac cannot marry As, my dear pls see a doctor for guidance ASAP. Mrs O
Delete@anon 7:29pm, its the same risk as AS and AS. One in four chance of having an SS child. My husband and i are both AS and all our kids are ok! We give God the glory!
DeleteMy dear it's not the same as SS o. Y'all saying it's the same, it's not. SC is more severe. I guess that's why they are scarce sef cuz they don't make it as far. I'll advise you to take aa walk.
DeleteSS is the most severe form.
DeleteWith IVF, you can do gene selection. Just save up just 600k,do IVF and have ur AS or AA kids. There is more to marriage than kids. What if u leave ur AS guy cuz ur AS and u get married to an AA and both of u never have kids? Just imagine a lovely marriage!!!!! IVF oooooo.
ReplyDeletethere is nothing GOD can not do...but @ d same ,,,,dont tempt GOD
ReplyDeleteIf u know u are AS and ur fiance is AS...pls dont get married........it is not for yourself...but pls...for ur unborn children
As a mother,,,when d heat comes now...ur husband might nt support you...u will carry the burden alone......dont expose ds unborn kids to a miserable life biko
@Galore
With IVF, you can do gene selection. Just save up just 600k,do IVF and have ur AS or AA kids. There is more to marriage than kids. What if u leave ur AS guy cuz ur AS and u get married to an AA and both of u never have kids? Just imagine a loveless marriage!!!!! IVF oooooo.
ReplyDeleteWhere is IVF 600k? Certainly not Nigeria. Please give me the address.
DeleteThank God he is AA. Msm
ReplyDeleteHi SDKers,I am a Sickler and I know wat it means 2 live with d disease,itsnt being easy bt with God on my side I am pushing on,wud b 28yrs dis year.Pls if u are AS & ur intending spouse is,my candid advise is flee,having a sickler is not easy,its draining emotionally & financially.Now Stella,u made it look lyk all sicklers don't leave a normal life,u kept writing death death,I stand 2 correct u on dat,some life 2 a ripe age an eg is Dr Kuku in Nigeria,he is in his 60's.And with God on my side,I'll live more than that.Thnks
ReplyDeleteAmen. Stay strong trooper.
DeleteThank u for educating Stella and her uneducated commenters. My bother is pushing 37 and he is SS and doing fine and by God's grace will live well into his 80's. Stella and co cannot even guarantee their own tomorrow and they are speaking as though having a condition equals death. The typical non-progressive way Nigerians react to things they don't understand. Research, read and learn, DUMBOS!
DeleteAmen dear. Please forgive madam stellina she's jst giving advice about it.u sha live longer Dan ur parents in Jesus name.
DeleteGod bless you. While it's wrong to advise AS/AS to marry. Also try not to be too insensitive with comments because some sicklers read this blog even you stella na crase woman for your comments at the end of the post. People wey no be SS dey sick of other things and die. Where sicklers are born due to mistakes in laboratories, then it's not their fault. Any situation wey life throw come your side, manage am like that. God dey.
DeleteHi dear. I pray d Lord keeps u n all others with d disease. Every1 knows a sufferer that's if u r not related 2 them. My ex boyfriend is SS but he is very healthy surprisingly. We broke up n later reconciled.He fathered a baby who later died days after. I just thot abt it n asked his genotype n he confirmed what I wasn't thinking SS not even AS but I was still ready 2 marry him regardless since I am AA. Unfortunately it had 2 end again. D key word is prevention since we r all now enlightened. My 2 cousins r also SS n they r pushing thru.
DeleteAmen @ poster. Pls dont take Stela's comments to heart. D intention is not to hurt u. Everyone will die eventually. Lots of hugs
DeleteThank you! Some outgrow most of it! my brother is alive and kicking by God's grace! Takes care of himself ! God almighty is sovereign! Please stella get a healthcare professionally to teach ur people how to take care of these ss kids!
DeleteDis is actually a very trying topic. Its not easy 2 call off sumtin built on true love but if it is so true keeping in mind that d resultant effect is not only on d couple involved n can easily tear down d foundation of dat love, it is just right that d relationship be called off. Yes some are lucky not to hv SS kids but nobody can tell unless again I hear they can test d feotus n either abort if it turns out 2 be SS. I don't think that is a gud idea though wot if one has to abort 4 5 times b4 getting an AS or AA baby? I think with prayer n proper guidance couples can get thru d pain of breaking up while looking @ d bigger picture.
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous 9.48, you are a very selfish person, must you get married. How can you knowingly bring a child into the world just to suffer and die because you r in love and want to marry. the pain of taking a care of a sick child and burying her/him is nothing compared to the pain and hatred the child would be feeling all through her life knowing that her parent did not love her enough not to get married and bring her into this world. I get fed up when two adults with As gets married with the intention that science will help out when it comes to child bearing. science is for individual that found themselves in such situation unknowingly and not you going with all your senses alert and open. Is only in Africa that this kind of issue is discussed.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteAS Carriers now feel more confident in marrying fellow AS or even SS carriers because of advancement in Medicine.
They can do genetic testing of foetuses and eliminate sicklers in the first trimester. The same way Chinese mothers use in eliminating female foetus.
My eldest sis-in-law is AS, her hubby is AS too.....they did the necessary tests before wedding,,so they were aware but they chose to manipulate the test results they submitted to the marriage committee of dia church.....they got married,,,had two SS children out of three children,,one died during crisis some years back,,,the other(a girl) is still alive but is always sick......i remember wen d other child died,,she was shouting..God,y did u do dis to me??? but the bitter truth is,,she subjected herself to pains and tears not God,,,what were they thinking wen they manipulated the test results???.....its better to avoid some things than confronting them.......
ReplyDeleteEveryone should do genotype testing severally to ascertain their correct genotype especially in Nigeria. I say this because I once had a strong conviction that I was AA duly confirmed by a test done at a general hospital in Nigeria. Fast forward several yrs,pregnant with my first and living in the UK. Was shocked to my marrows when I was informed that I was AS after routine blood tests. I made them repeat the test severally and to my dismay I was actually AS. I really thank God because I nearly married a guy who is AS as i thought I was AA and would often brag about it. My husband is AA but our son is AS. On the other hand my relative is married to an AS guy she being AS herself. They have 2 kids(boy and girl) who are AA so it boils down to luck as well.
ReplyDeleteStella, thank you so much for this post. I was about to write u on this same issue. I am AS genotype, I usually ask any guy I meet his genotype right from d onset of our meeting, infact that's d first thing I will ask. I met my guy a year ago and he told me he was AA when I asked him. Our relationship was going really great, we talk abt our future together and he meant well for me to say that he was a perfect guy d type any girl would wanna be with. Last year November I found out I was pregnant, I told him abt it. Then he was away on business, he was very happy and pleaded I keep d pregnancy, he said he wanna spend d rest of his life with me since am pregnant already, he suggested we do all d neccesary rites and d wedding quickly before d pregnany starts showing. When he got bk in December, he came to see my family and they all liked him. He took me to meet d mum and d mum asked me my genotype, when I said AS, she changed her face and said she knew her son was born AS and I was so confused. She said we shd take d test together. I was so angry when we left there, my guy said he has taken a genotype test last two yrs and it came out AA, and he has heard abt people"s genotype changing so he took it that his has also changed. We went to two different labs and we both tested AS. Now his family has refused they won't allow him go thru such pain of having a sickler, my family too. Am still carrying an 11weeks pregnancy which my guy does not mention anything about it again, he only said d family has refused. Am about risking an abortion for d first time in my life.
ReplyDeleteBefore having a termination, check the baby foetus. U just might be carrying an AA or AS child.
DeleteBefore you go and do it! Check the foetus please!
DeleteMy friend just lost her 10 year old son last sunday due to sickle cell. So heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteLemme digress a little pls. She is a Jehovah witness, I attend winners and we are really really in love. I mean real undiluted love. Her people do not approve her marrying a non witness but there is no prob with my people. I can handle dat side. The issue is dat she herself is not ready to join my faith. For her, its either Jehovah witness or nothing else. I can't see myself converting to her side too. That's impossible. She is still insisting we can live under the same roof while practising different faiths. Now the question, what faith are we going to profess to our children as the right way? Is the home not divided already? Are we not being selfish and blinded by love? I'm a man of faith and I don't joke with it. With deep sorrow in my heart, I'm about to call off the relationship today cos for me, as trivial as the issue may sound, it can actually destroy the home. Pls, let us always consider the consequences of our actions when we claim to be in love. it is sheer wickedness and outright selfishness to knowingly bring a child to this world to suffer the agony of sickle cell anaemia
ReplyDeleteYou are going the right thing bro!
DeleteAny time I hear these genotype incompatibility stories, I just wish I could do something to snap the person involved out of this dream. It is a horrible dream. What kind of love would make one take chances with his/her unborn of springs? What kind of love would make you think you are prepared to sleep over in hospital wards countless times, buy blood of strangers, prevent your child from engaging in energy consuming games with their peers, give supplements and drugs daily in rain and sunshine, cook different meals for the sick child, have your child scream and scream in pain almost every month, and later die most likely when you have come to know that child.It is most definitely not love but selfish desire. Yes, I know, God is a miracle worker but you don't make selfish choices and tell God to bail you out. God is not Santa! I lost two brothers to sickle cell anemia. They were both grown up and through with university. One of them was even engaged when he died. I am a mother and I know my mother's pain. She still mourns her sons everyday. Don't make this mistake.
ReplyDeleteI'm a sickler and growing up was hell! Apart frm d agonising pain,i had to endure emotional abuse too bcos pple used to insult me abt it! Some pple wl just be asking suggestive questions n saying trash all bcos of my geno,bt today,I'm beta off dan most of dem! I even used to curse d day i was born and question God,but today,i thank God for giving me a reason to be thankful.
ReplyDeleteu see,i neva thot I'd live to be 16 bcos of d tales of naysayers bt here i am today, a lawyer and wl be 30 soon! I just thank God for my life! I hope to tell my story one day to encourage d young ones,that is if we stl av people like me around bcos i blieve d disorder can be avoided!
If u can avoid it,pls do and if u r already in d situation,just trust God!
I tap into this on behalf of my brother as we continue to pray for divine healing!
DeletePlease I really thank God for your life please call me at this number or better still give me your email address am in u.s.a.thanks. I want to talk to you some more.
DeleteThis brought tears to my eyes. My sister is a sickler too and I pray she has your strength
DeleteI knew i am AS since age 14. I am now married and preg and i ask my hubby if he is AS or AA he said AA but i am scared i did blood test and my AS flagged up and they have wrote me a letter to bring my hubby alone. The apointment is feb 4th i swear if he is not AA i will not take it easy with him.
ReplyDeleteSo by word of.nmputh you believed him? Better take it easy with him and live with d consequences
DeleteAC CAN NOT marry AS. Ask your doctor(s). Am AC. AC + AS = Possibility of = AA,AS,AC,SC. For every pregnancy (it is a probability game cos u don't knw which will come first). SC is almost same as SS. And same crisis stuff affects SC even when they say they are lesser evil compare to SS. I ended my wedding plans few yrs back wen it was clear my guy is AS, n both families no agree. Trust me I do research till I taya. Am happier now n bless my family 2day cos den everybody was enemy, trust me when d "wrong one" comes 1st, both parties won't b in a "haste" to try 4 more babies. My cousin is married with a 12yrs old SS, only boy,only child. And in her late forties. The husband says "no need" to try 4 more children. My cousin dey suffer d consequences of "4 better or worse love now = SIOHO(she is on her own" according to d husband. Right now once upon a time luv don turn Alomo bitters+stella bitter leaf + bitter kola. she says she can't n won't b shocked d day d husband comz out to say he has kids else where. The small boy blame his parents 4 his pain each time. Abeg mk we free matter 4 mathais n story 4 tortoise . May "I thy knw" not b our chorus. Free d love dat comz with AS, fish plty 4 ocean, except yo faith strong, then n only den e mk sense to seek God miracle 1st. But note dt God must not be mocked or tested. (Sori 4 ny error).
ReplyDeletewtff is AC? Are you forming your own?
DeleteAC is a gene variation. AC and AS might have AA, AC, AS and SC it is not as severe as SS but severe all the same. Google is your friend
Delete@anon 9.48 pls dot marry himm oo. our family friend had 5kids 4 were SS and 2 died while serving while remaing 2 died in university, d only AS guy dat is remainin dat shld pity his parents went to a pool party wt his friend and died dis 2yrs ago,dis gave d mother partial stroke and d husband quickly remarry anoda woman and no has 3 kids from her, i always pity d woman,due to dis i have sent off 3 AS guys who came for marriage last year cos am AS,i dont want dis kind of life pls post dis madam stella from adeola
ReplyDeleteMy late elder sister was SS and it I wasn't easy on anyone! Watchn ur loved one in pain and always in and out of the hospital is traumatizing! We lost my sister when she was 26yrs and till date my family still mourns her loss. Pls break up now and save urselves the agony of watching ur child in pains!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's easy to discuss these things like it's trival.u cannot understand what these kids go thru as sicklers.i see more northern parents affected these days as i'm a medical personnel.Take a few days to visit the hospitals n see how much pain they pass thru n u will definetly have a rethink.much luv to those in lov
ReplyDeleteCecenaija
It's easy to discuss these things like it's trival.u cannot understand what these kids go thru as sicklers.i see more northern parents affected these days as i'm a medical personnel.Take a few days to visit the hospitals n see how much pain they pass thru n u will definetly have a rethink.much luv to those in lov
ReplyDeleteCecenaija
One of my daughter is SS which if I told u she's SS u won't believe it, I have three children which 2 is AA and one is SS, I and my hubby didn't know we are Both SS, until we had our second daughter which she's SS, gush she's 4 years old and very very pretty girl, she's never been sick which I believe she will never will, we live in uk sha oo, but I believe with GOD all things are possible
ReplyDeleteEx use my ignorance, which one is AC? I know of AA, AS n SS.It is in Nigeria"abiku so ologun di eke", meaning"an ogbanje child makes a doctor a liar"excuse my interpretation. Due to the ineffectiveness in the Nigerian health sector we tend to think all SS anaemia patients are bound to die (just as this post irks of death penalty for SS patients) .Truth be told, , it's not a film trick o, it's a situation where mothers will be praying the pain for that particular month should pass unto her so that her baby will rest for that particular month but then let's give it to the whites, tbey might nt be as intelligent as we Africans but forget it their brains on another level with the kind of treatment and all that.Google too is our friend esp we that are in Nigeria and can't afford all tbe the medications, let us learn about the disease and we will be glad we did because of ways and precautions we will learn to live be it as a patient or loveone.
ReplyDeleteLastly, AS is the strongest of all thr genotype (they never get sick, they are the most healthy just that they can't marry another AS)
Parents with ss children, take care of your kids better! Medical science has advanced! Especially those of you with money! With a little TLc your kids can live. Everything is in God's hands but do your part
ReplyDeleteI have a sickler as a sis, growing up i wished i could take part of the pain away- seeing her reeling from so much pain- and the family surrounding her helplessly- some crying , some praying. One time i actually prayed that God should ease some of her pain and send to me- instantly my knees started hurting so bad- i was like this is just a fraction of d pains she's going through. Anytime i come across sicklers- i go the extra mile to be nice to them, some of them do harsh and menial jobs_ but God keeps them. I wish a technology will come ASAP to help them. I love my kid sis so much, so far God has been faithful and she will fulfill her destiny. Over the years , she has learnt how to manage and take care of herself, so the crisis doesn't come so often. God bless and keep them.
ReplyDeleteStella pls help me post this for d person dt asked for it,i wanna get in touch with d person unless u dnt post e-mail addys! Thanks!
ReplyDeletenamspuntus@gmail.com
what of people that have been married for 15 years and still Trying to conceive. Mehn only God knows tomorrow. You cant understand people's situation until you walk a mile in their shoes
ReplyDeleteFaith is real and can be exercised
Sickle cell is not a death sentence. We Nigerians blow everything out of proportion, and maybe it's the doctors that don't know how to manage sickle cell. Normal red blood cells are supposed to be round in shape but in the case of sickle cell, it is looks like a crescent (the name sickle); imagine your blood vessels made for round blood cells but now the blood cells are sickled shape. And when the blood is sickled the surface of the blood cells that is supposed to trap oxygen is not because it's bent out of shape making this red blood cells clump together. When the clumped blood cells (which block blood flow) are especially in the vessels, limbs, and organs it causes the pain (crises), organ damage, infection and if not arrested can lead to death.
ReplyDeleteWhat doctors can do for their patients is give oxygen during crisis, give IV fluids (hydrate), and give pain medications to keep comfortable and relieve pain (morphine).
I hope I didn't confuse readers, as I tried to keep things simple.
Dr B.
Thank you doctor, you couldn't have done better.People here it is, sickle cell anaemia is no death sentence it is just the way we manage it that is different making it look as if there is no way out .Google the disease and managing won't be a big problem at that and with faith and God, you will suddenly be AA, that I can garanty you because only GOD is the greatest healer.
DeleteNot a death sentence but a painful existence nonetheless.
DeletePeople talk about faith in God . Would you stand in front of a truck and say I won't be run down abegi.There is a saying God helps those who help themselves. He performs miracles not magic.He has given you intelligence use it. Marrying for love and having chikdren with the ss gene is pure selfishness. If you are in a country which does gene mapping another word for abortion and you can deal with the emotional trauma that goes with the process then use it.If you can't do not be selfish. It can be your first, or the first three or the last there's no rhyme or reason to the order of having ss carriers.I lived in naija and now in the UK the medical treatment doesn't make pain more bearable. Severe pain is severe pain.When I fall ill I have to pray for a medical team who understands the severity of my pain and not soneone who think how bad can it be paracetamol will solve it.I have been in that position where I was not getting the right treatment for two days until the doctors where rotated.
ReplyDeleteWe focus our energy on insulting other people or talking too much. The truth is we are all afraid. Life is scary because we can't predict the future. I'm AS and I have broken up with a guy because he was AS. I also didn't continue with another guy because he was AS. Guess what I am with another AS guy and for some reason I don't know how to breakup with this particular guy. Why? Because he is amazing. I have been a very terrible AA guy before and I had a lot of issues. But the truth is I don't know how I would feel to knowingly bring in a child to this world to suffer and eventually die. The thought of it already breaks my heart. So I'm scared. But this is the difference between we Africans and Caucasians. White people will put all their energy in researching on this. The only reason why there is no cure yet for sickle cell is because it's not a White man illness. What do we Africans do we rather stay with someone we don't really like and manage the rest of our lives with that person.
ReplyDeleteThere is a procedure called the CVS and it can be done in Lekki, Lagos (see the link below).
ReplyDeleteThis procedure will tell you your baby's genotype and other genetic disorders and can be conducted from 10 - 14 weeks of preganacy. Please read up on this and get informed. Gone are those days where same AS genotype prevent couples from marrying.
http://www.nairaland.com/1050015/cvs-amniocenthesis-diagnosis-centres-nigeria
Am dating a guy right now and we both find out we r both AS and AS so ask him we should breakup he say no we should continue dating until I find someone I want to get married to before we should separated, pls friends should I continue dating him or I should leave him
ReplyDelete@ anon 15/1/16.
ReplyDeleteI think you should end your present relationship if you want to before starting a new one, because if the new guy finds out about the old/present guy, it could be messy and give him a wrong impression about you.
It's a difficult situation to be in, but if you are willing to take the risk, there is a cure for Sickle cell disease, it has some unpleasant side effects (like infertility) and procedure (bone marrow transplant) is very expensive as well.
Check the link below for more information.
http://www.m.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/bone-marrow-transplant-for-sickle-cell-disease
Goodluck dear.
I am about to tonight. She told me she is AS but I was reluntant to do my own test till I was down 3 days ago and had to see my doctor. I did the blood test and it revealed I am AS. We have dated for a year as I am yet to be intimately involved with her. For real, I hate to see her go but its time to let her go... Geeee she just Whatsapp me now. So depressed...
ReplyDeleteI tink my husband is planning to leave me cos we re both AS.i am so depressed.i didnt choose dis genotype.why am i suffering so much emotional pain frm it.i ve nt had experience love in d past 2yrs nd now he wudnt even touch me in d past 6 month.
ReplyDeleteWow, I have a son already from another man, engaged to another man who is AS and am AS, he refused to breakup with me. That we can check the fetus, he just talked about the wedding plans again. Am sad.i was scared that why I didn’t abort when I had my son out of wedlock. Don’t know if I can go through it. But his parent are both As and there are 3, all of them are AS, d mum also remove 1 possible SS fetus.
ReplyDeleteHi, I just found out my partner and I are AS and I'm a month pregnant for him
ReplyDelete