Good day Stella/blogvisitors,
been wanting to send this for a while but didn't know how to... I'm at a cross road in my life now which may I think may result in me killing myself or running away from home. I'm 22 years old, graduate and first child in my family. We are three and all girls.
I graduated from the uni last year after which I fell into depression because I wasn't shortlisted amongst my set batch list. Its gone on for long even up till this November that's making me think I'm cursed or don't have good fortune.
I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth, my dad practically spent all he has to push me through school so that when I'm done I can support my lil ones especially my sick mother. Now I can't but see the disappointment and hopelessness in their faces everyday.
When I was I younger, 17, I was forced to sleep with my 20 something old boyfriend... I don't want to call it rape since I walked down to the house with both of my legs. I was sexually active for a few months, then I broke it off cos I knew it deep down he was taking advantage of me. After then I met someone else... We had sex just once and still I couldn't get the guilt off my heart. Mind you, I never slept with any of this people for money... I was emotionally shattered at that young age... My family had a huge share of the world's problems... And being in a relationship shielded me from them somehow.
Fast forward to a few years later... I gained admission into the university, I met God, he healed all those wounds... I felt love, I felt new... I vowed I was gonna keep myself till marriage and for a man that deserves and was gonna love me despite my past. I was single all thru my years in the uni... not that guys weren't coming around or I wasn't attractive but somehow I learnt to discipline myself and God really helped me. Hoping to begin dating after school, that was when the NYSC thingy hit me, there was no one to talk to, my friends were in camp, I survived the first few months but later I just couldn't resist the urge... I fell into depression big time. I started losing weight, ate very little, my mum is so concerned that she cries anytime she looks at me.
Along the line, I met a guy, it was like he was heaven sent... Has so much prospects... And I could tell he loves me... Slowly, I began to feel better... Cos he was always encouraging me,telling me not to give up hope. To cut the long story short, I compromised.... We've slept together twice now... He said he's gonna marry me, I told him initially I wasn't going to have sex till marriage... But he said he was gonna leave if I don't, cos if the urge comes, he wouldn't want to cheat... I had to say yes fearing I might return to where I just came out from...
Now... Have had unprotected sex twice in 2weeks... Used postinor twice in these 2weeks... I'm so scared out of my bones right now... If I turn Preggie?... I may have to kill myself or run away from home.... I don't know what to do. I can't even talk about it to anyone... I feel so ashamed of myself. I feel have failed everybody especially God and family.
My boyfriend said he's gonna stay if anything goes wrong...plus the thing is he's still schooling... How did I ruin somebody's life along with mine? I really don't know what to do??
I know God's never gonna forgive me.... Making the same mistakes twice and on purpose isn't just forgivable. Please blog visitors advise me.. Don't mind my grammar or composition... D most important thing is you get the message....kill myself or run away from home?
TEE
*I have her PIN if anyone wants to contact her and encourage her.we did it with Lade and she is stable now.she will be reading comments so please do not cuss her out at this vulnerable time.
Titilope God loves you and he has already forgiven you.
Dear poster,if I tell you what am going through as am typing this,you will drop your worries and declare fasting on my head. But you know what? I won't kill myself or run from my problems because I'm a super woman. The God I serve must take those problems away one day. Stay strong you are not cursed God loves you,you're special to him. Don't have sex if you can't take the guilt. Keep living darling you are young and have a whole bright future.
ReplyDeleteHHmmh...my dear u don't even have a problem compared to me!! I graduated 2011,but I just got my nysc number,I am goin for nov batch!! Praise be to God,but yours is just a year's wait,mine is more than two yrs!!! I really understand how u feel,I was very suicidal and infact I did a lot of crazy things!! But hey I have my number now and that's all that matters!! My mates that went for nysc have since passed out,but here I am!! The truth is that u don't know what God has in store for u!! Almost all of them haven't gotten jobs yet,even those that were feeling on top of the world!! I bless God for this painful wait of two yrs! I was looked down on,talked down on,used for doormats by a lot of people including family members and siblings!! My self-esteem reversed to zero!! I couldn't open my mouth to talk when others are talking because I will be reminded that my mates are moving forward while I'm still stagnant!! God allows such things to happen so as to teach us great lessons!! I learnt a lot this period! I learnt never to trust a human being because they will always fail u!! I received succour from only one human and that is my sister!! She always encouraged me and never stopped believing in me!! My mom always insinuated I was a failure and my dad always advised my other siblings never to look up to me!! I am not morally loose,infact I am still a virgin,but all sorts of allegations were made against me!! My younger siblings disrespected me at will becos,they knew nobody would ever come to my aid...I really thought about suicide,I infact googled ways to commit suicide!! But I tell u honey,suicide isn't the best..the best is for u to make sure u succeed in every area of ur life!! If u are a nobody that is when ur life will just keep going without obstacles!! Immense urself In God's word,infact that has been my best company this peroid!! I think God allowed this delay just to bring me closer to him!! While in schools I hardly rememberd God!! I thank God it happened to me now,at least I have learnt human ways and human nature!! I used to be a very free,happy and extremely generous person but right now dear I am more careful with people!! My boyfriend dumped me after always helping him with the little money I got,I always exploited the little I had and still ended up cheating on me and eventually dumping me for I gal I had known all along!! That was when I became extremly depressed and my self-esteem zeroed!! I have since gotten over him,but God will definately give me a man that will be much higher than his level in anyway!!! I can already see the bigger picture,my tomorrow is tooo bright and these challenges came so that I would be able to handle the immense blessings and fortunes of tommorrow!!! Btw am also 22 yrs old!! Pls sorry about the long story ooh!! I just felt like reaching out!! All my experiences can't contain a book!! And my dear if u can pls keep urself busy,go to cooking school,learn makeup,learn how do sew,if u don't drive go to driving school!! I didn't improve myself much this period becos I was always thinking I would make the next batch,so I didn't want to start anything reasonable!! I use android so I don't have a pin,if I could get ur fone number somehow,that will be better!! Pls don't commit suicide cos if God were to show u ur future eeeh,u will hate urself for ever thinking about suicide in the first place!! I have made up my mind to live,be happy ,get married,have kids,travel on vacation,be highly successful and be the envy of others!!! I'd be off to camp in two weeks bu the grace of God!! Sorry for the lenght of this epistle!! Love ya
DeleteLove u too beyonce, pls stay strong.
DeleteJust felt like giving the Titilope a big hug. My dear pple go thru different stuffs in life, ok? Just have a positive view towards life, don't see urself as a failure.
I will advise u not to take contraceptive pills again pls use condoms if u must have sex or tell ur partner to always us withdrawal method. You can as well study ur cycle to know ur safe periods. Pls don't run away or kill urself o, there's more good things in life u are yet to enjoy cos the future holds the best. And pls take all ur worries to God in prayers, HE never fails.
Hugs
First of all, ur problem isn't one that I've not seen b4! I didn't go to law school with my mate last year and I had the worst depression ever cox pple I was better than ended up going but trust me, alot of them failed the exam! God doesn't allow somethings to happen to U not cox he doesn't love U but cox he is removing something for U. Be Patient on ur Nysc stuff!
ReplyDeleteSecondly, God is ever willing to forgive us. U can decide to abstain frm sex today and God will help U trust me. U should seat ur bf down and let him knw ur where u stand plus u should be frim and have self control. God bless U
Tnx swthrt I love ur coment. Love u stella the best blogger so far. Verde
DeleteSo what u are scared of is getting pregnant?then u must be very stupid.u should be more afraid of STD,the ones that are treatable n untreatable!
ReplyDeleteShe might be stupid but at least she's reaching out for help. You on the other hand, are ugly and there's no cure for that. Pple like you think you know everything and you sit on your high horse criticising everyone. She came here for help; if you can't do that, keep quiet!
DeleteGod loves u,yes, but I still can't see your problem. U r depressed because you haven't served? No be your mates still de find admission? You are scared you will be pregnant for a student? You de crase ni? You had unprotected sex, what were you expecting? Money to fall out of your pussy?
ReplyDeleteMtcheww, abeg, to me, you don't have a problem.......I am even getting angry at you.....
Thank you Mrs. D! I was beginning to wonder what exactly was making her depressed! Do even know what depressed means??? What I expect you to do is to count your blessings... You haven't served, some other people have not seen the four walls of a University, some can't pass UME, some haven't graduated but have carry-overs, You slept with a man, did you not think of the consequences before you did? What did you think might happen?...You really do not have a problem, this is not enough for you to be depressed over...what will happen when you have real-life challenges? This is an opportunity to make better your mind and harness your skills.That means if you finish NYSC and don't find a job, you will be suicidal again ni? Pls my dear, know your stand as a child of God and stop listening to the lies of the devil! Buck up!!! This should make you stronger not wallow in self pity! If you want to throw a pity party, then go ahead but it won't serve you! So sweetie, Buck up!!!
DeleteTitilope, I promise you, God has forgiven you. He sees your heart and that's where it matters. Pls hold on. You will go to service, you will get a job and be a blessing even unto others. What you just need to do now, even in d sin is to praise God. Also pray to Him to make a way for u. I understand how it feels to want to be loved. I know how it feels not to have anyone to talk to. Hold on Titi, others have been through even worse and they made it. You will too. Peace
ReplyDeleteBimbola.
Learn a handwork.
DeleteMy sister learnt 4tography by working 4 a studio now she owns a studio in Abuja....a big one. And dis is just her 4th year after service.
She never used d certificate one day cos most graduates don't do photography and no one needed her CV 2 employ her...so Sister, think of what Ʊ love and learn it......the whole life of going 2 school, serving and getin a paid job is a trap.
I work and earn 80k a month while my sister makes about 1.2million a month...she pays salary, removes rent and has 300k 4 keeps????
Don't get me wrong..schooling is gud, serving is better but developing urself 2 be an employer of Labour is d best...
One love sister.
If Ʊ kill urself, its ur lose,
Word! Like like like
DeleteWith the numerous clashes with our Lord Jesus Christ, and their blasphemy, even on the Cross, Jesus forgave HIS enemies. As long as you're alive and within the envelope of GOD's Grace, you will always be forgiven, so long as you're penitent. Be prayerful and thankful to GOD in all things. It's the path to come out of depression. Never ever condemn yourself; telling yourself that you're cursed and all that. That's what the bastard satan desires. Don't give him that pleasure. A priest once told me, "Even while you're sinning, GOD is speaking to you". GOD is Most Gracious and Most Merciful. Harken to HIM, you'll be fine; That's a Promise. God Bless You.
ReplyDeleteDon't feel left out.that you have not gone for NYSC dosent make you a loser.you are lucky you even finish school.what of Me that drop out of school in my first year just bcoz there was no money.my parents was very poor that we hardly eat 3 square meal.thank God for my life today..I have a very wonderful hubby,smart kids and a flourishing biz.just look for a small biz and keep your self busy, that's how I started.secondly,stop dating all this chewing- gum boyfriend.look for a man who will take care of you emotionally and financially.this world dey sweet die....don't kill yourself oo
ReplyDeleteTrue my dear stop dating all dis chewing gum bf's 4 now coz dey ve a long way 2 go 4 example if u get pregnant now am not sure he's ready 2 take up dat responsibility. So plz luk 4 guyz dat re well 2 do,single guyz,deres notin wrong in setting standards 4 ursef coz trust mi dat chewing gum boy ur with is only using u 2 cure coz dats whr he kills he's frustration too.
DeleteMy dear they r right. I got pregnant 4 a chewing gum jobless bf n ended of aborted. Upon all the love he professed he couldn't pay 4 my antenatal. So I had 2 remove my baby. Stop dating chewing gum bf. U will live 2 regret it. Go out 2 places. Meet people, get a hand work like bead making(there is a lot of money in it). I would like to get ur pin. So I will initiate a business plan 4 u. I am a year older than u n already on the path to success. I do bead neckalce, sell the cheapest 4 15k 2 big women. In a week I could makw 45k. Keep urself busy. Get a man that has a job.
DeleteYour worried about getting pregnant, you should be worried about HIV. Why do people still have unprotected sex in this day and age??
ReplyDeleteEh ya... So painful. My dear, dere are oda gals out dere who has done worse dan what u did. God still forgave dem. So pls don't downgrade urself and loose ur self esteem. God is ever forgivin no matter what u've done.
ReplyDeleteGive me her pin stella
ReplyDeleteGod loves you dearie,he Loves u much more dan u knw.@ a time like dis his strength is made perfect in ur weakness..2 wrongs can not make a right,,by killing ursef or running 4rm home,u make matters worse.Forgive ursef n ask God 4 mercy,he's ready 2 show u mercy.Life is beautiful my dear,u have a great future ahead of u,dnt let satan steal ur joy or lie to u,look ursef in d mirror n see hw u r wornderfully n fearfully made.Life is full of challenges,no doubts,bt u v to b strong 2 face it.look unto God n let him hold ur hand n take u thro it.try n get ursef out of dat depression,cos it does notin bt kill u slowly,,u r way beta dan dis..u will definitely go 4 service,and afta dat u will get a good job n u will b able 2 help ur family.ur future is bright.acclaim dis positive tributes to ursef daily as u look in d mirror,weneva u feel down n pray ur way out of dis feeling...u r ur only help.God will not give u a burden to difficult 4 u to carry.Trust him n all will b well wit u.plsss dear,suicide is not an option no mata wat,u will only bring Gods judgement upon ursef,running away 4rm home is not it @ all,ur family loves u.we Love u,n above all God Loves you.IT is well!
ReplyDeleteTitilope darling,our God is a merciful God. Killin urslf is nt an optn n runnin away is nt either. Gods luv 4 U̶̲̥̅̊ supersede any oda luv
ReplyDeleteIs his ear deaf that he cannot hear you or is his hand too short that he cannot save you? Even if your sin is as red as scarlet, he will make it as white as snow. Sweetheart, no man is without a sin okay, he is a merciful God ask him for forgiveness and he will forgive you. We all have our trying periods not going for NYSC yet is not a serious issue, it will all come to pass I stayed 3yrs at home before I got admission, your delay is for a porpose just pray more and believe in GOD. Killing yourself will compound your woes because you will go to hell fire.
ReplyDeleteAs for your being pregnant, go and run a test first but I strongly believe you are not and even if you are, keep it it may sound difficult. Your parents will be disappointed and all but remember you live your life to please God and not to please man.
Finally remember that he's plans for you are of good and not of evil do not allow the satan to trick you. You are just 22 and u have great potentials. God loves you and I personally love u sis live long for us okay.Wish I can reach out to you darling. #Be strong#
God loves you titi. Every one has a story to tell. God has healed you already.
ReplyDeleteDear Titi, you have to forgive ursef first and understand that God's love for you is unconditional not bcos of ur works but his nature and it covers all our wongs........pls do not giv the devil a chance at this critical time and allow him get the better part of you...just know that there's no pain or sorrow God can't heal but you have to believe....stay blessed!.....stella pls can I have her pin???
ReplyDeleteYou need spiritual and medical help. Walk into a randomly selected place of worship and talk to the spiritual Head.
ReplyDeleteDepression is a medical condition. You can't help yourself from thinking suicidal. You can however help yourself by seeking medical attention. You can walk into any LASUTH or any Government Hospital to see a psychiatrist. God will help you.
Is his ear deaf that he cannot hear you or is his hand too short that he cannot save you? Even if your sin is as red as scarlet, he will make it as white as snow. Sweetheart, no man is without a sin okay, he is a merciful God ask him for forgiveness and he will forgive you. We all have our trying periods not going for NYSC yet is not a serious issue, it will all come to pass I stayed 3yrs at home before I got admission, your delay is for a purpose just pray more and believe in GOD. Killing yourself will compound your woes because you will go to hell fire.
ReplyDeleteAs for your being pregnant, go and run a test first but I strongly believe you are not and even if you are, keep it it may sound difficult. Your parents will be disappointed and all but remember you live your life to please God and not to please man.
Finally remember that he's plans for you are of good and not of evil do not allow the satan to trick you. You are just 22 and u have great potentials. God loves you and I personally love u sis live long for us okay.Wish I can reach out to you darling. #Be strong#
Temi God loves u that's y ur posting is not out yet, do u know what he is preventing? Do u know how many copers get killed @ dir post? U re Prob a Catholic cos of d way u spoke abt ur body and pregnancy, all u need @ dis point is embrace God, keep friends and a bf if u can. D word of God heals all wound, find a good Bible school Ard, once u find God, u find LOVE. 2844b3f4
ReplyDeleteTiti, u need to tek a breather. Lemme start wt d NYSC thing, itz nt jst yhu, we knw wat our Education system s like, if u ve an extra year or sme issues delaying yhu in skul, I fink u shld jst stop taking it too personal nd try to sort it out instead. My frnd waitd almst 2yrs for ha call-up leta, bt it finali came, so dnt fink d universe hs sumtin against u, itz ntn new. As for d sex ish. I gt whr u re coming frm, Evri1 feels overwhelming guilt after they gyv into lust. Bt dnt be too hard on urslf, u cn stil mek a choice, if u dnt wanna sleep wt hm anymre, dnt. God z mre forgiving than yhu knw. So tek a very deep nd knw dhat it cld ve bn worse. U dnt v to figure evrytin out today. Try to kip n touch wt ur girlfrnds, and dnt 4gt to laff @ stupid tins whyl u re @ it. Lyf s too short mehn.
ReplyDeletePoster: Find a good church and worship God, find something doing before nysc comes up. Stay happy, stay away from sex too. I used to be so depressed, didn't have a bf, didn't have a lot but I focused on God and being a better me. Fast forward few years later I finished my 1st degree in 2006, served 2007 started working in 2008 today I am an Assistant Manager, earn over half a million monthly, have a great job, have the best man on earth, we getting married next year. All those people I was using as a bench mark for myself are still scratching the surface and wishing they were me today. So my dear poster, focus on GOD and your self, join a service group in church. For me I joined living faith church and the teachings restored me and gave me hope again. May God bless your soul. Please don't run away from home even if you are preggie.
ReplyDeleteHello dear, have you ever tried burning a finger? Ouch it hurts then imagine when thrown into fire for ever..continuous pains and regrets...you wouldn't want to go to hell dear when even the devil is afraid of hell..so, killing yourself is giving yourself a VIP ticket to hell..just because your name was omitted does not mean you are cursed dear such mistakes happen a lot.you were delayed for a reason..what if you made it to the camp and died?? Don't you think it was for a reason? God has plans for you that are greater than your imagination so, hold on the best is coming, Secondly, whoever told you he must sleep with you simply because he doesn't want to cheat on you is just a player...using postinor twice a month is not good not to talk of in 2 weeks..stay away from pills that is why there's condom and withdrawal method but I think for now, abstaining from sex is all you need.whenever suicidal thoughts creep in, rebuke it cos it's from the pit of hell.there's greatness in you and that is why devil wants you to take your own life..get closer to God cos no matter our sins, He's faithful and just to forgive.you are a star...go and shine..trust me, you are loved.
ReplyDeleteSTOP complaining about your mistakes and move forward. You want to stop having sex? Yes you can! Forget whatever he says, if he truly loves you he'll respect that. Besides why should he be talking about marriage now when he's still in school. What does he want to use in taking care of a family. Oxygen?
ReplyDeleteYou know where you came from and you know where you want to be. I advice you focus on that, let that be your motivation. Work hard, try to be independent from men, and see how men will respect you.
Dear poster plsss u don't have a problem I just feel u make wrong decisions most times.if u hear my own story u will know u have not seen anytin.but thank goodness dat God has finally put a smile on my face.any man that tells u he loves u n sex is d main tin,mind u dat is not true love.be calm n let God lead u all d way u ar 22 n still have a lot ahead of u
ReplyDeleteUr not having ur things the same time with ur mates doesn't make u a loser,God's time for everyone is different,as destinies are different.
ReplyDeleteall I advice u is continue to be a strong believer in God :the bible says in Jeremiah 29 that the plan God has for us is for good and not for evil,to give us an expected end.keep holding on,one day it will all make sense if u trust God.
As for relationship,pls sort ur emotional issues before u go into any relationship else u will be in it for the wrong reason,hence become vulnerable.men love to take advantage of girls in ur state,so they can give u 'terms and conditions' for the relationship,something that should have been based on mutual respect.
Babe, I rily dnt see y U̶̲̥̅̊ r filin depressed. T̅ђє̲̣̥ fact dt U̶̲̥̅̊ 've nt gone to serve doesnt mean U̶̲̥̅̊ wunt go4 service nah. U̶̲̥̅̊ dnt av any prob as far as I'm concerned. If U̶̲̥̅̊ hear oda pple's story n knw ƜЂa†̥ oda pple r passin tru, U̶̲̥̅̊ 'll tnk G̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴͡D̶̲̥̅ 4 u̶̲̥̅̊я lyf. U̶̲̥̅̊ r done with skul only service. ♍ƺ I neva enta uni still strugglin to gather money on M̶̲̥̅̊y̶̲̥̅̊ own to go to skul. I'm a single parent. I'm responsible 4 T̅ђє̲̣̥ upkip of M̶̲̥̅̊y̶̲̥̅̊ baby.hs dad doesnt drop a dime. He'll b a year nxt mnth yet I am api. With all dis n mre dt I cnt even type, M̶̲̥̅̊y̶̲̥̅̊ baby n I r survivin. He's lukin S̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡ healthy. I av nobody to turn except G̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴͡D̶̲̥̅. If U̶̲̥̅̊ turn our pregnant, fyn. Its G̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴͡D̶̲̥̅'s gift. Abortion is neva an option. Encourage urself dear n make urself api. Find sumfin to do 4 T̅ђє̲̣̥ time being. Dnt make an attempt to u̶̲̥̅̊я lyf. G̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴͡D̶̲̥̅ wunt b api with U̶̲̥̅̊. Wen thr's life, thr's always hope. Hang in thr babe
ReplyDeleteI think you have a big problem my dear little girl, Firstly,must a man make u happy? I can see u have a wonderful mum for her to b concern abt ur weight $ all, why don't u talk to her wen u're down? Mothers will always b mothers, secondly, Continue in ur christain faith nd God will send a man to rasie ur family for ur sake , wat re u doing wit a poor student nd u claim to b from a poor home? (Badge no dey toll badge o) thirdly, haven't u seen graduate whom have served nd haven't gotten a job for 5yrs? Have dey killed demself? I waited for three solid yrs b4 I served nd 3yrs after I still haven't gotten a job I have a business of my own now. Better get busy wit ur life nd stop thinking of marriage nd service. Hissss, if I tell u my problems u will ran Naked on d street nd thank God for urs.
ReplyDeleteMy dear Titi! It is well. If you reside in Lagos please try and attend tomorrows mid week service at the headquarters of the MOUNTAIN OF FIRE AND MIRACLES MINISTRIES YABA- the theme of the programme is breaking of curses. Time is 4:30pm. Pls be there. You must testify IJN amen. Don't harm your self u have a bright future ahead of you. Don't allow the devil to win this battle. Just be calm....it will all end in praise IJN amen.
ReplyDeleteI want u to know that Jesus love u more. There'll be a better days ahead, just pray and have faith. Pls I advise that u stop having sex with d boyfriend. If sex is d only stuff that will make him stay and he can't control his urge...what abt d spirit of God that will leave too or d guilt u feel? That is d Holy Ghost not happy with. If only we satisfy God by doing what he wants than that of men, d sky will always be our starting point.
ReplyDeleteTitilope, i nid u to understnd dat God forgives unconditionally, as a matter of fact, a lot of us severally has exhausted our second chances but grace kept us. His faithfulness still spills on us even wen wif being unfaithful. U jst nid to picture wat u want for urself henceforth. Anxiety can only make tins worse, put urself together, take a chill pill, life gives u a clearer view if u luk at it from a distance. Give urself more attention, if i'd advice u il say love ur self more than anybody else, cos u cant love others genuinely until u love urself better, and dat way no one can take advantage of u again cos u know ur worth. Any guy who values u will do wat will please u. Henceforth, run away from any guy that talks you out of wat u want for urself. 'Life is selfish' do u tink dey can love u better than ul love urself? Life becomes watever u make of it dear. It also leaves u wif different options; either to live or die, to be strong or weak, to be happy or sad, to be hopeful or disoriented, to be a winner or loser, to be a victor a victim. If i were u, i'd choose only d positive tins life have to offer. Life is too short to grieve. Cheer up and start putting ur tins togeda for service cos it takes the living to serve Nigeria
ReplyDeleteDear T
ReplyDeleteStop waiting for NYSC and start working towards becoming self employed. What do u love doing? When u find out u can turn it to a career. If it's fashion go n meet your local tailor to teach you how to sew, from there u can start sewing for ur friends before u know it others will start patronising u, makeup? Am assuming you may not have the means to pay for a makeup school so as a graduate I believe you have friends in that field. Beg them to teach you humble yourself and learn, before you know it you will be good at it. You can even start selling 2nd hand clothes etc your options are limitless. Just keep yourself busy till NYSC.
For the sex issue, it's simple abstain from sex or use C. You should be more worried about contacting HIV, Herpes,etc.
So a student wants to marry you huh.
Pls my dear stop wallowing in self pity and take charge of your life. Stop doing things you know you will end up regretting. Keep trusting and believing in God, he will see you thru. Make him your best friend.
Belledazzy.blogspot.com
Lol...I swear. What of those who never graduate sef, their mates do go for NYSC come back. OR the ones wey no see husband not to talk of boyfriend and their clock don dey tick...My dear, there are far worse problems than yours....ADVICE: Go to your uni and check what the problem is and as for ur undergrad boyfriend, surprise him with a pack of condom or packs today!
ReplyDeleteDear SDK, I have a problem too. Whenever i am broke, i get depressed. Should i kill myself or RUN away too?
ReplyDeleteLwkmd.....best comment
DeleteGood for all these people seeking attention. The good words from people here can actually heal you.
ReplyDeleteI got admission at d age of 25. I am 27 now in my 3rd year. Lost my parents immediately after secondary sch and my father"s people took over and I had to prostitute for two good years..I rented somewhere for I and my sibblings and paid for my sch fees. Already planning cater for my brother"s fees. I went thru a lot to b here...I am currently on a 3.7 cgpa. My dear,u dnt av any problem at all. Life itself is a jungle, u get bitten,beaten and even chased, but at the end of the day...your surviving spirit will survive u.
ReplyDeleteYou should have committed suicide.
Delete@ anon October 22, 2013 at 10:03 AM sounds like one chidinma girl.
ReplyDeleteHere's a big hug 4rm me 2 u hun... Be strong darling!!! We all have our problems. We cry in our closets and come out looking like all is well. Yes! All is well cos we put our faith in God. He's the beginning and the end. Don't end ur life swerii. Don't disappear. It's gonna kill ur mum. Trust in God and all will be well with u. I'll put u in my prayer!! With love 4rn a sista dat cares!!!
ReplyDeleteMy dear, i want you to know that suicide is a greater sin and there is no repentance in the grave. the fact that you are still alive means you have a chance to make it back to God. remember he is the God of a second chance. think twice and don't waste your life.
ReplyDeleteDear titi, am herr bcos we both same age and we ar goin through almost similar situations.unlike u I don't av parents I live with my uncle who is God's gift to me.unlike u I had a problem in skul in 400l with a lecturer that said I sent him a threat message.i clda been expelled but The God we serve doesn't leave his own cos I knew nothing abt it.thoo I dint graduate wiv my mates and I was scared as fuck of my uncle at first they comforted me and told me everything is for a reason.we must be thankful for that which God does that we see and the ones we do not see.imagine today is our convocation I feel very bad but I noe there is a greater joy ahead and that's my focus.titi b focus look ahead don't feel cursed don't pressure ur self in a relationship that isn't worth it.dere is this song that says he dint bring us out og eygpt to take us bac again.thoo there would be trials but we would not be afraid because he brought us out to take us into the promise land.titi before u were born God knew u.his words says that he won't give us any problem that is beyond us.see everything as a test of your faith in him(james1:2-4).pls always pray and never give up.for he wld brng justice for his chosen one who cries to him day and nite.be strong titi as for the sex and the boy it is hard but u have to stop and leave the boy.make God your best fwend.i can also be dere for u as a fwend also.invite you to my church to hear the wonderful testimonies of ppl.and see that ur problem is a minor one.note:am a gurl like u also.cheers.
ReplyDeleteDear am almost in same state with u concerning the NYSC stuff except mine is worse cos ur story is better than mine, thank God I didn't commit suicide this year if not d grace of God n d advice I gave myself I wld v been dead by now, I cnt really go deep into it maybe another day. Ask God for forgiveness concerning ur sexual life, he is a merciful God n most escially cheer up, live a good life and everything will be alright
ReplyDeleteBelieve inb God and it shall b well with u.
ReplyDeleteMy darling girl, pls take a deep breathe and calm down. Your problems are few compared to many other people have seen and they still go ahead everyday, with a smile on their faces. Let me give you a brief summary of mine. You should be grateful that at 22 you're a graduate. Guess what, at 25, I was still trying to graduate. When I got to my final year, after a five year course, my name was not on the list of graduants. I was 23 then, u then went to the registry to find out why and guess what? I had a file, but my file was EMPTY! I had no result at all from my first to final year. I had nothing to show that I was a student of that school. The only evidence was that I had a file. I went to my faculty but my file there was empty too. So while I watched my mates go to law school, I was going to JAMB and WAEC offices to get my results and letters etc. Then back in uni I had to start looking for all my results. This took more than a year, being in a federal uni, with very poor records, it wasn't easy at all. The amount of money I spent during that period ehn! Then after a year, my juniors left for law school and I still couldn't find some results. I even had to write some again. I went to a uni that had two different campuses, some borrowed courses belongs to depts from the other campus. I had to go there, where I had never been before, or where I knew no one to look for results. Long story short, after years of tears and sleepless nights and spending money that I didn't even have, at twenty six, I finally was able to go to law school. This was after my mates had been called to the bar, served and were already working. Now I'm a lawyer, I've served and I'm presently working. Sweetheart I didn't even tell you the half of what I faced during that period but guess what, I came out of it. Life is not a race/competition. Delay is NOT denial. God has a reason for everything. And guess what, He is extremely merciful. My darling, your sins will not make God automatically withhold his blessings, especially when He sees the sincerity and contrition in you. You need to calm down and appreciate life. I also felt depressed, I was ashamed to leave my house cos my mates were ahead of me, I stooped hanging with friends cos when they were working and I was still in uni. But now, here we all are. Be thankful sweetheart. YOU ARE NOT CURSED.
ReplyDeleteVALERIE.
What a silly girl. You have no appreciation for your life whatsoever. Go on commit suicide. One of the easiest ways is by overdosing of sleeping pills and slipping away. But since you are cursed, go out the hard way. Set yourself on fire or better still, blow your brains out. It is a very effective method. Ciao.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, relax, u don't have a problem. I finished school 2010 June and went for service same year. Now I have served with no job up till now. Relax God is in control and believe me he has great plans for u, his plans for us is that of good not of evil.
ReplyDeleteTitilope, you are not alone in this. There is a reason for everything and I believe God is in control. Just bcos u r yet to get ur nysc letter doesn't make u a failure or a cursed person. You don't know the danger ahead that God wants to avert by delaying ur nysc programme. My dear, u have to be grateful cos the bible says in all things give thanks to God. With regards to the pre-marital sex, all you need do is to confess them to God and He'll forgive you. God hates sin, not the sinner. Don't be too hard on urself, u need to forgive urself and receive forgiveness from God. Most importantly, abstain from pre-marital sex. It will do u no good! Keep reading and meditating on the word of God, pray daily and keep trusting in God always. He hasn't forgotten u one bit. Remember, ALL things work together for good to those that love God and are called according to His purpose. He will perfect all that concerns you and make every crooked way straight. God loves u my dear sister, He really does and u have to believe that, dnt let the devil or situation tell u otherwise. PS, dnt even think of committing suicide, the thought itself is a sin not to tAlk of carrying it out. God will help u, uphold and strengthen you in Jesus name. Massive hugxxxxx
ReplyDeletePls my dear poster, suicide is not an option n will never be. I feel for u and all ur going through, u don't have a problem, be grateful u can point to them, it's rili nothing my dear. As for these issues, ur a lady, u need to know ur 'body' n stop having unprotected sex. If u feel this much guilt and ur partner understands, then stop sex if possible and focus on things u can do to develop ursef. As for NYsc and ur career, it's only a matter of time, things will work out. Be prayerful my dear, prayers put a lot of things in place.
ReplyDeleteSame thing happened to me.I finished sch in 2006,then didn't serve till 2009.I tell u those waiting yrs where the worst in my life.Every one abandoned me except my mum...I mean EVERYONE.evn the bf I had then told me I didn't go to sch,and if I shld confess and tell him the truth,he ll make sure I get admission again.But today,the story has changed,cos a job was already waiting for me while I served,cos it's not all abt youth service,but getting a job after it is Wat matters.Now I even assist som frnds who went for youth service b4 me secure a place where I wrk.Some even stayed with me till they got their apartments.My dear,somtimes,these things happen so God's name will be glorified.God never leaves us,it might seem as if he is silent but I can assure u today,that just like he did to me,He will shock u.You will remember these trying times in future and just smile.Trust me the future is very bright..and believe all things wrk for ur good,if you love God.#hugs#
ReplyDeleteDear Poster don't behave like @Sophiesleek oh.
ReplyDeleteLol! I really don't know what the issue is o...I'm still trying to see what's making you fall into depression. You found love in Christ and u fell by the way side, my dear just retrace your steps and every thing will be alright. You have all the answers you need in the bible and prayers, peoples' advice will just help in making your life twisted.
ReplyDeleteKilling yourself would be the MOST SELFISH THING TO DO! You say you've lost weight and your mom cries whenever she sees you? how do you think she'll feel if you kill yourself?! Running away is not the answer too, that's just weak! Proverbs 24:10- If your stregth fails in the day of adversity, how little is that strength. Even God knows there will be tough times, grow a pair and lean on Him for strength! You did t give life so you have NO RIGHT TO TAKE IT EVEN IF YOU "THINK" IT BELONGS TO YOU!
ReplyDeleteThe graces God made available to us humans are unlimited and by God's grace we are who we are. God still loves you and He hasn't left you. Just go back 2 him like a prodigal child. #Bless
ReplyDeleteMy dear,u don't even have a problems compared to mine.. I "graduated" in 2008 and my mates have since gone and come back from nysc. I'm finally going this November batch,thank God. Meanwhile I was supposed to get married to my fiance last year but I allowed myself to be deceived by one sharp guy that was showering me with money and gifts. I left my fiance for him,then he dumped my sorry ass for another babe some months later. Now my fiance is well to do and married to someone else and I'm alone.. I for don kill myself twice nau! Whatever u're goin thru,the storm will pass.
ReplyDeleteDear Titi, If I had gain admission in2 d uni wen I finished high school and went 4 service wen my mates were serving I might not b typying dyz cos I would probably b dead. Im 26 and still in my final year dont even know wen ASUU will call off. 4 d guy 2 insist on sex or else he will leave u means he dont truly care 4 u. Do u prefare 2 hurt God 2 mere man? Plz leave dat guy. Babez, any man that cant wait till d nyt of my white weddyn 2 ve sex wit me can go. I no dey beg am cos as u c me so I dey fear hell fire die! So let dat guy find his square root! I pray u dont get preggy but incase u are, though itz hard u ve 2 keep it. The day I saw Genny and her daughterz pix wit smilez on thier face, ahhh I was just too happy and began tykyn wat it would b lyk if I had a baby. Lolzzz. The only time I will advice u 2 run away from home is if u are pregnant and ur parent forcefully insist on abortion then runaway from home 2 come back later. Dyz lyf sweet well well so suicide iz not an option. Above all pray 2 God and ask 4 4givness, he will answer u cos inspite of all u ve done he still loves u dat much! Yea, He loves u much more than u can imagyne. One luv!
ReplyDeleteMatthew 18:21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”
ReplyDelete22Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
THE GOD THAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT NOT FORGIVING YOU PREACHED THIS. Have you sinned against him seventy times seven in a day? Well you do not have the right to take your life because you did not create it. The word is "repent, confess and believe . . .' You're forgiven and stay in his word. God bless you.
I dont see any problem here at all,,,,,,i got admission into the university to study medicine,,i had to change my course/faculty and even loose 2 years(cos i was almost going for my clinicals) because i didnt give in to sex advances from the dean of my faculty who made life so miserable for me then,,i was so frustrated and depressed,,,,infact some of my friends then adviced me to give the dean what he wanted so i can study the course i desired but i knew what i wanted for myself........today,,,I am a Mechanical Engineer registered with the Nigerian Society of Engineers,,,am married with two beautiful kids and i have a very good job,,,,,some of my mates that we got admitted into the university together are not employed yet,,some not married but i thank God for myself.......anytime u feel so discouraged and u think God isnt on ur side,,pls pick ur bible and read Jeremiah 29:11.....that passage gave me so much hope during my difficult times..............Secondly,,forgive urself for compromising ur stand on premarital and ask God to forgive u too,,,renew ur promise and ask God to give u the grace to stick to it......it is well...
ReplyDeleteSweets u don't hv a problem @ all.reject d devil @ once my dear.think of wot wil happen 2ur mom wen u tk ur life.God has greater plans 4u evn tho its tkin long trust me its 4d better.dont kill urself d devil is speakin to u but m glad bkos he's fightin a lost battle.belive in urself dear God is a God of second chance.i awaite ur testimony dearest.
ReplyDeletepls dont take your life
ReplyDeleteAll u need is inner peace my dear. I know what it means to be depressed cos I've been there severally. And trust me mine is usually very bad. The most recent and I trust God that will be the last was so serious I almost passed out. Long hours of insomnia with severe headache and me eh! I can think for Africa sha. One night after I tried to sleep for more than 3hrs and couldn't I found myself crying. And suddenly I remembered God's promises for me, I went on my knees and sobbed profusely while praying to God to grant me inner piece. When I got up from my knees I was a new being altogether uptil this moment. And gues what has been the reason for this recent depression? I feel my fiance doesn't have enough money for our marriage and he's just that guy character wise n personality. (Now isn't that gross??). U ve got nothing to worry about, some pple's story here has really amazed me. Ask God for inner peace and constantly remind yourself of God's promises. Keep singing it, keep saying it. May God see you tru
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