ALERT.....this mail is full of GBAGAUN but i chose not to edit it because i do not want to tamper with the story.i read it and i understood,please read it and go straight to giving advice...The sender will be reading,he is a fine young man that i know,please take it easy with him...na GOD name i dey use beg una.
This is the mail.
''Stella, please kindly help me in publishing these true story. A friend of mine is marriage for 8years now, with 4kids. He is really in pain now as we speak and confuse of what to do.
According to him, the marriage has never known happiness, they have never lived or stayed together for one good month without having issues at home.
It has been these way for almost 8years now. He later travel to the middle east after he lost his job in nigeria. According to him they both agreed he should travel since things seems not to be working out him.
But then they are still having issues even when he is not in nigeria, they quarry over little things. He due send her 20,000naira every month for feeding, from his monthly salary. He pays the kids school fees and house rent.
But then, the wife is still not happy, always making issues from every little thing that comes up. She is that type that will never admit she is wrong. He is just one year old here in the middle east and has sent lot of items to her and the kids. My friend is that type that does not want to hear the kids are lacking anything.
He does all he can even going as far as borrowing if needed just to make sure the wife and kids happy. The wife in question also work in nigeria, she is not a house wife.
But of recent she asked for some money from him at the begging of this month August 2013, but he could not meet her needs, but promise to send them some money by the middle of the month.
She got mad at him, saying he always like giving excuses any time she ask for money.
She knows very well that he is working on a monthly salary here. She also knows how much he earn in a month, he does not hide anything from her.
But then she won't see reasons with him, she calls him all sort of names.
Now she told him to think about the marriage once again that life is too short.
My friend is in a great pain now, ask she does not pick his calls no more, she has also blocked him in whatsapp. For days now she has refuse taking his calls...leaving him in pain. He has sent series of text messages to her, put lots of calls to her, but she was not moved.
Please he wants to know if he should still keep call her?
He also wants to know if is normal for couples to be having issues even when they are far from each other.?
He also wants to know if divorcing her will be the best option, since she wants to enjoy life as its too short according to her.?
He is worried about the poor kids. Please he needs your advice as soon as possible.
The kids are still tender...aged from 7 to 6months old baby.
*BBC please walk on by..grammar is not our language in this case.thank you!
What sort of stupid essay is this????
ReplyDeleteTell your friend to mind his/her business! And Pls your english needs serious working on.
DeleteYes idiotic essay too!Msheeww
DeleteU see, this is why Nigerians suffer. Did u not read Stella's caption where she advised that we look over the blunders and move straight to the matter at hand? But no, u still had to pass a comment on the grammar. If u have no advice for the dude get the fuck out of her. Bloddy distraction
DeleteSo a grown man will sit down and write this? Asking Stella and her readers for advice?? Thank God for my husband, who doesn't even have time for all this.
Deleteplease they should part ways
Deletelool ..anyway 20k a month is too little for 4 kids ..but i suggest the madam moves her mother in and get a job asap stop relying only on your hubby since he doesn't earn enough
ReplyDelete... Pls farabale and read again. 20k is HER pocket money. He sends money for school fees and upkeep. She works, must she suck him dry? Vampire Lady.
DeleteAshley.
Stella u made d story up? He's bin away for a year dat means he has neva seen his 6months old baby? He shuld let d bitch go jare and collect his kids! Broda work on ur english u jus dey gbagaun up and down! Msk
ReplyDeletei dey my HACIENDA with my Don Daniel dey watch una JelenKeLi....
ReplyDelete@Spy.
Maltina Cares.
Delete@Spy,
DeleteEnjoy digital life.
@spy say hi to camilla,Alonso,Denisio and Andres
DeleteAll these letters are always so badly written. Please don't give me the typo thing. I wonder about the people who send you emails and those who comment here. Anyway, if yinkus can comment, any razzo can comment and send in a letter too.
ReplyDeleteAnother idiot. Is it everyone that is educated? Bloody cyber bullies u all are. Are all our fingers equal? So bcos he can't write good English he's disallowed from seeking advice abi? Get outta here with your all sufficient attitude. Arrogant educated retard!
DeleteThank you! Thought I was the only one that noticed,the man is obviously not well educated, must we condem him because his grammar isn't up to par? Your friend's wife is a troublesome woman and it isn't normal for couples to fight so frequently even when far apart.Your friend should stop calling her,shey she has a job now,he shouldn't send any money or call her for 2 months then let's see her reaction. The children won't starve afterall she's working and earning salary. Maybe she will use that 2 month period to correct what is wrong with her brain and start appreciating her husband.Onibaje obinrin.
DeleteThe guy involved is wimp. If he is not careful, he will steal or carry drugs to satisfy a woman. Then he will be jailed, and then he cant even call the woman. Tell your friend that he should ignore the woman and concentrate on making his life better. Like my father says," If you find yourself trying to convince a woman that you love her, you are a poor man. But if you see woman begging you to assure them you love them, you are a solid man"
ReplyDeleteI luv u.. so intelligent n cute!
DeleteGuess aboki J̲̥̅̊u̶̲̥̅̊s̶̲̥̅̊t̲̥̅̊ signed into googlelink....he didn't v a pic b4...I usually luk foward 2 his comment walahi cos it oozes of intelligence!
DeleteSorry your friend must be goin tru hell but u made it easy for us to understand dat tins are had here wit ur English. Ur english is putin us in ur friends condition. But brother it is well
ReplyDeleteWhy r pple so insensitive? He should work on his english like seriously dats d best u cld come up wiv?? I dnt knw d story seems a bit one sided to me!!! I tink d dude should do whatever he can afford to do abeg and if he knows d quarrells r too frequent den he doesn't have to speak to her daily, besides na so e easy to find man after four children....make pant dey wear d madam for der.
ReplyDeleteBilly Jean this is you as anon. Don't think you won't be fished out. Troll.
DeleteBillie doesn't write like dis my anon....if U̶̲̥̅̊ know billie well, J̲̥̅̊u̶̲̥̅̊s̶̲̥̅̊t̲̥̅̊ frm her 1st sentence U̶̲̥̅̊ would v had an idea!
DeleteBillie knows you know she doesn't write like this that's why she changes her writing style when she posts as anonymous.
DeleteNaija ppl and their oversabi nature, must everybody know how to write good english? Stella has apologised on his behalf, so y d lecture? Instead of u guys to face d main thing, u are there talkn trash. Mtcheeew. Am out of here jare!! **runs away** CLASSIC BABE
ReplyDeleteCan't deal with this hot mess. Very bad English.
ReplyDeleteAt first "read" I suspected my fellow Sdker,High HighQueue,wrote this!However,the hecule poirrot in me knows the aforementioned speaks and writes well out of the closet! To this matter!O boy,why na you dey write on behalf of your friend?you no get life?So tay u know say dem block your guy for whatsapp!so the wife tells you everything? Abeg na where she dey tell u? Na during after~play or foreplay una dey gossip the man wey dey middle east dodging extremist bullets?You know too much.You re a home wrecker!Keep on doting on your friend's wife o.Cutlass still get iron wey dey sharpen am and biscuit bone full your neck like all other homosapiens! Signed:wide eyed!
ReplyDeleteYou just displayed your stupidity like its a honourable award. It didn't occur to you that he got all the Infos from his friend. I used to waste ma time reading your comments in the past. Now I know better, would rather read from Tom n Jerry than reading your next garbage.
DeleteSerzly??? Dd u even read this e-mail? The guy in question is his friend nd he's the one complainin to him not the wife..nd from wat he has said, he isn't supportin his friends wife..u guys should always read before crucifying people..in the bid to make a funny comment and insult people, u guys just rush and miss d points..msshheeww..
DeleteAnd u are happy uv contributed meaningfully? What gibberish u write whoever u are. Your bid to strike a comic relief is as much a blunder as the writer u try to diss. So incoherent and distasteful. I understood the writer better than this rubbish u write here. Must u talk? Gosh
DeleteI think he's in middle east with his friend, and said friend probably always confides in him.
DeleteWide eyed..
DeleteHas it ever occurred to
you that your comments
are very painful to read because you
fail to use the appropirate punctuation
marks?
And then one actually takes the effort to read
it and it turns out that you are capping bullshit!
Anon 10:00am&6:39am God bless ur souls for the pertinent observation. And the wide eyed idiot tries hard to be funny. Another blog nuisance like BloGlord who has sunk to oblivion. Imagine the senseless things she writes. SMH
DeleteLoool..just passing by
ReplyDeleteDis story Ωa̶̲̥̅̊ die. All relationships always have ups Ω̴̩̩̩̥ downs S̶̲̥̅Ơ̴̴̴̴̴̴͡ he should try Ω̴̩̩̩̥ sort tins out wit Ђeя̲̅ ASAP
ReplyDeleteTimes like dis are difficult.In as much as u expect your wife to be understanding,you also have to be considerate afterall she's a woman.She needs someone to complement her,som1 dat would act lyk a man towards her.Its not easy for her to do everything fr d kids plus the fatherly roles,run her businesses,work,taking care of the little baby,house chores n both your families wahala.Just be patient and encourage her even if she's wrong,choose a time when you both are happy n tell her nicely the way it wunt hurt her coz its not EASY O assuming the RoLes of both daddy n mummy.Always show appreciation to wot she's doing in your absence.Gudluck
ReplyDeleteGood advice,thank you
DeleteIgnore her totally for 2weeks n see hw jittery she Will be,am a woman and I knw how it hurts when we try to form macho even after series of begging frm our man,by d time d guy start hin own all those shakara go end sharperly.if u doubt it try it for four days and see the result...holyghost fire on anybody dat corrects' my typo!
ReplyDeleteI suggest divorce o cos no matter wat d guy does, she will never be pleased with him. She has fallen out of love.
ReplyDeleteDt's nt true.@rough diamond. 4kids n 20k a month. She is just trying to encourage d man to work harded. Am so sure she spend all her money on her children too. They are lil children their demands and needs are more than adult. Children eat, more than 10x a day. The story is one sided. I'm so sure the man insult her and don't appreciate her taking care of the children. Pls don't suggest divorce, dt's no remedy.
DeleteAfter all the begging from SDK Nigerians still come here to scatter the poor guy. Una shaaaa. Well, I can't advise on marriage so just pray sincerely about it.
ReplyDeleteMy instincts tell me 'Mr Friend' here jus recounted HIS own story...Oga,take a weekend off and go home,have a heart †̥ heart chat with ΰя wife and lay these same complaints gently and lovingly, Ʊ would be amazed at what Ʊ would learn from her!!!I still maintain there Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ always 2(or more) sides †̥ a story...Marriage isn't a bed of roses!
ReplyDeleteMy bruda what you needed now much is to keep silent on her,try your best to remain silent on her maybe for months,nd before you do that send her an sms telling her to live such life she wishes to live,,,
ReplyDeletethen you find any of ur family member or relative as a post man you will be sending money monthly to give your wife for ur children feedings etc,but make sure she must sign each money u gave her from ur post man,,goodluck,,from swiss
Anon 11.59PM..
ReplyDeleteYou are wrong o.
He should not ignore
her,it will only make things
worse.Has it occurred to you
that the wife may be fed up
with him and the Marriage and
is seeking even the slightest opp-
ortunity to dump his ass???
As for me,My broke ass boyfriend
ignored me for a week and i dumped
his ass.Life must go on!
Every woman wants a man who respects her for her values, virtues and ethics. She wants a man who is proud of her strong character and her unique personality. A man who can support her unconditionally and stay connected to her soulfully. A woman who loves you truly will never ask you to buy her expensive gifts or take her to expensive places. She won’t ask for diamonds, rubies or a promise to bring her a world of luxuries. She just wants your love, care and attention. She wants you to spend a lot of quality time with her and appreciate her for all that she does for you out of love and affection. Every woman is unique in her own way and she wants to be the most appealing woman in her man’s life. A woman’s heart is so full of love for the man of her life that she just gives it freely even for the little he does for her. She doesn't want commitments and promises she just wanted to be loved to the core. The problem is from the husband,He should plan on coming to see them its not easy Staying like a widow when you actually have a husband.
ReplyDeleteCome to think of it,Maybe She Wants to have SEX.hmmmmmm
Oga..forget this bullshit U just typed..All dis one na tory tory..
DeleteSee..a woman like the one you just described is probably a single girl in the first 2months of a new relationship..Wey love still dey *shark*.
By the time you are with a man and he cannot afford to do shit for you..whether or not the woman is making her own money,She would get fed up with that relationship.
This may have applied in the past when there was nothing to really buy with money.But check out today,Blackberry..Ipad..RangeRover..I004 apartment..dem full ground..Is it love that would buy them?
Abeggi..leave that talk for tomorrow.The fact that I work and earn my money does not change the fact that my man should BUY all the necessaries..
That is why he is a man.If na to Fuck now even for middle of night wen pesin don tire,dem no go dey 'understanding'.
Money complements love..do not forget that fact.
Sorry for my essay.My ex almost sucked me dry..gotta let shit out.
My dear true talk
DeleteAnon August 20, 2013 at 6:27 AM you have to be
ReplyDeletethe chief of idiots and retards to retort like that. Or you sent that letter and purposely wrote it badly? That's your type. Ewu gambia.
This letter has given me head ache, I pity the guy, he should move on because madam has moved on.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is for better for worse, things are not so rosy with the man and yet his wife who is also working nags and complains alot even when she knows his income. If a wife and not a girlfriend should complain this much and threatens the marriage with a word like 'short' it very well shows she is tired. What he should do is to find time if his job would allow and have a heart to heart discussion with her or bring their family into the picture and let the matter be resolved amicably if she wants out then he should grant her and continue supporting his children.
ReplyDelete- keenki's words -
4 doz of ya who commented +vely 2 ds story,ya'll did well.and for those who felt there own english s d best in d world.I av 1 word 4 U. Embrace hell n burn.u guys ar d worst fellas on earth.
ReplyDeleteremember the vows you made on ur wedding day? for better, for worse, and u said... i do. well, brother, this is the "for worse" they were talking about, so deal with it
ReplyDeleteShe is tired he shld stop being a bloody doormat nd act like a man wit a back bone for once dat obviously wat she needs which one is cryin nd beggin she has four children she doesn't need an extra baby jor
ReplyDeleteSabrina
Well, some things do go down in marriage that is less than ideal. I feel he should stop calling the woman. For a while at least. Let her get whatever it is out of her system. Who knows maybe some bobo don dey look am. Can't be easy living apart from ur husband if u r still a healthy young woman. Even if no be bobo, pple sometimes feel they hve been dealt one and just get very irritable. Either ways, u do have to give them d space to sought out themselves.
ReplyDeleteEnglish no be our langauage. Abeg you people should free the young man that is the problem we have here in Nigeria a Chinese man will speek in his language in UN summit the same thing goes to so many other countries you may know why do we always want to speak and write Eliza's language like her when she can't even understand yours.
ReplyDeleteRichy English is my language. that excuse is so 1960's. Maybe it's not your language so don't put everyone in the same boat.
ReplyDeleteYou want advise? You don't have family members abi kini?
You know what they say ... When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
ReplyDeleteThis is the time to prove what kind of stuff he is made of. How much of a man is in him. How much of an adult he is.
Marriage is not always a 'get out when thing get bad' kind of relationship. It is the 'stick around and work at it' relationship.
As long as abuse is not involved, I do believe they should strive to make it work.
He just needs to get back to Nigeria and out his house in order.
Nigerians can like condemn people inglish. Na wa o. High and mighty. No be evelybori went to school. Given your advises and ignorant the gbagaun.
ReplyDeleteSigned...High-HighQueue
I will appeal to the husband to be patient with his wife and truthfully speaking, 20k is not enough feeding allowance for 4 children and a wife, regardless she is working, there are other expenses that crops up apart from school fees, rent and medical he takes care of.
ReplyDeleteThe wife on her part should calm down and be reasonable. He just left a year ago! He has bills also to meet where he lives. He cannot do more than what he can afford on his salary. Rather she should be praying for things to improve for him, so he can send more money.
he should contact her parents [if they are alive] or siblings and explain his predicament, and see what happens from there. Meanwhile, he should still continue calling and sending sms for the sake of his children. If all appeal fails, then he should let her be and simply be playing his fatherly duty.
Some issues that Oga needs to consider since
ReplyDelete1) 20k is not enough
2) Nigeria is way to expensive e.g transportation, maintenance etc
3) So much family bills/issues/matters + office work
4) No companion/partner for support
5) Life as a single mother with 4 kids is no joke
6) So gone are personal times.
7) Domestic staffs house help, driver wahala i.e without Oga to help out when they are not available.
8) Sex everyone needs to love and be loved.
9) Jealousy. The thought of oga cheating
10)Lack of effective communication between both parties. Some times when a message is not properly passed it gets lost in the process.
11) Temperament of both parties.
12) Up bringing of the kids/enforcing discipline.
13) Male admirers.
14) Times are hard for a lot of people presently, but please do not let it affect all you have both shared. e.g while you were in Nig. have you tried staying with all your kids alone for the whole day without any help? you will find out that it is beyond a full day job; tending kids please appreciate Mme efforts for it is not easy. Sweet words suitens pains. All the best wishes my brother.