Dear Stella,
Words are not enough to express my gratitude for the work you are doing bringing out the ills of the society . I want to say a big thank you.
Pls I have a VERY serious issue bordering me which I want to seek your advise and that of your blog visitors.
It is about child violation by an older male uncle. It is a BIG concern to me because I experienced it and want to protect/save my daughter from it.
Now the story goes this way.
''At about the age of 7 or 8yrs, my older male cousin who was doing apprentice for my father, called me into his room to take money and help him buy something. I went to collect the money but instead of sending me on the errand, he locked his door and asked me to remove my pant for him to see if I urinated on my pant. I did and he began fingering me & at the same time warning me not to make noise/shout. He thereafter undressed and raped me.
He warned me that he will beat me if I say anything to anybody. I never mentioned it because of fear.
This experince was about 30yrs ago.
I however got married early in my twenties & was childless for 12yrs before I conceived. I am blessed with 2 beautiful kids; a boy and a girl.
My present predicament is this:
We live in a 2bedroom flat with my 2kids, house girl (17yrs) & my husband's male cousin (29yrs -Applicant).
I had suspected him & my house girl but dont have any evidence. But recently, there was a quarrel between both of them which was kind of a confirmation.
Also, I have on three occasions seen him carry/sit my daughter in a suspicious or compromising position such that immediately he sees me, he lets go of her or tells her to get down and go to mummy.
Sometimes, he carries her on his laps as he lays down facing up with his knees bent and she's on top of him with her legs spread. Another time, he carries her as he sits on a chair, cuddling/petting her and whispering something to her ears.
My daughter is below 3yrs and is a very brilliant and sharp girl. She once complained to me that her wee wee was paining her and I asked what happened she said it was 'uncle'.
My problem is I dont know how to tell my husband about this without being misunderstood as he does not know about the rape I suffered. He is a lawyer and has a way of always turning issues against me in as much as it concerns his relations. We have being married for 18yrs and most of the marital problems that have threatened our marriage are issues that have to do with his relations and I.
Please, I want real advise to help me with this.
Thanks.''
Mrs. Anonymous
whattt???? madness is the word...may God have mercy on us all
ReplyDeletecontinue HERE
more stories HERE
This is more than madness, too deep for me to take in. I was abuse as a kid too.mine was so serious that Every male teacher I had from age 7 till I got to SSS 3 abuse me. They did not have full sex but what they did,damage a lots of my childhood. I'm 32 now and I can't settle down I chase men away from me. Am a loving person ,people tell me this, all the time but the damage is done.
DeletePls! No story that Man must leave the house. I SAID LEAVE! Pls let him leave. U were a much stronger person to deal with your situation but I was not. If u can see it, think it, hear it what more do you need.
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteMadam poster, are you for real? Your daughter said her 'wee wee' is paining her, which means her bumbum is paining her. You asked her how come and she said uncle. And what did you do that day?
DeleteYou allowed it pass?
You didn't tell your husband?
You still let the uncle play with your daughter?
And you are asking us for advice?
Orishirishi. Madam, the fact that you were once a victim is enought for you to guard your daughter well so that she doesn't fall victim like you did. Madam, for the love of God, keep close tabs on your daughter! Make it obvious to that uncle that you don't want him around your daughter. And your husband sef, I wonder the relationship you both share that you couldn't run to report to your husband immediately your daughter reported.
Madam plz in the name of God chase dat man out of ur house or let ur daughter tell her father b4 wind blow fowl yansh open. I suffered ds same predicament wen I ws much younger 4rm 1 stupid uncle & wen my mum finally found out oh God I cn never 4get dat day,my mum used pistle,hot water & stick 2 chase him out of d house & dat ws d end of molestatn. Plz madam u shldnt condole such no matter d situatn,tackle it now b4 ur daughter bcomes a sex addict plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
DeleteSomething is wrong with you woman!!
ReplyDeleteThe day your daughter complained to you,what were you ment to do? no be to take d girl go meet your husband make she talk d same thing for him front??? What stupid mail and question are you now asking us? If anything happen to that child of your just know its on your neck cause d poor little girl don already give you clue.. And hencefort,guard your children like your life depends on it,infact,no yeye uncle should carry her again..what bullshit!!
Wasere iya jebu! Pls tell her!
DeleteWhat kinda mother are u? Your child has given u a clue already,what more do u want?Yet u sit ur fat ass there,asking for peeps opinions abi?Tell ur fucking husband,I'm sure he wuld do something about it,cuz I am sure he won't open his eyes and fold his arms....-i was abused too by my cousin,so I know how hurtful and pained one can be, especially when u think about it. Rise up woman,have more time for ur daughter and protect her from sicko like that guy, and tell ur hubby, if he doesn't take any action, u take actions urself...
DeleteSometmes i wonder if this people are real? What's she even complaining about? She already knows the truth yet she wants our opinion..........#confused#
DeleteMG....
Hmmmm...please please stop him now before its too late...he's obviously molesting her already...Warn him to stop or else there ll be serious wahala...Madam please fight for your daughter...
ReplyDeleteNawa oo.my dear 1st of all confront d guy.warn him very well.den if he continue den report to ur husband.cos ur fear Is u don't want him to hv problem wiv his brother.
ReplyDeleteThe problem with nigerian ladies is that we endure things that aren't meant Ï„̅☺ be endured. So Ï…̲̣̥r̲̅ going Ï„̅☺ sit down there and watch Ï…̲̣̥r̲̅ child go through d horrible experience u had as a child cuz of the fear of what Ï…̲̣̥r̲̅ husband might say Ï„̅☺ u. Ï…̲̣̥r̲̅ child should come first. Tell Ï…̲̣̥r̲̅ daughter Ï„̅☺ go and tell his dad what she said Ï„̅☺ u. I'd rather go back Ï„̅☺ my father's house or go live in a church than watch my OWN child get molested in my OWN home. No way! I'm a mom too with 2girls and a boy and woe bethides d idiot that wants Ï„̅☺ defile them. Cuz i will go crazy on d fool!
ReplyDeleteWhatttt!! omg! This is not about any fight with any yeye finger-pointing potty attached husband abeg, ur girl's well-being, mental health and hole life is at stake here, u have no idea how being molested messes someone up, and trust me i am one to talk, u r HER MOTHER, her protector in life after God and u r coming here to send story to Stella instead of taking action, madam get that man out if ur house FAST!! Apprentice ko, Exterminator ni! If ur husband has any feeling or sensitivity and his daughter, his three year old daughter's innocence is being messed with he will back u up and do what's right immediately! Kmt, finger my daughter, na hot oil I go pour am for sleep.....mschew! Madam u better do something FAST
ReplyDeleteMadam please watch your brother inlaw closely,I had this similar experience with my teenage brother inlaw,his own he was using tiny broom stick on my 8months daughter and God helped me to bump on him unawares,it cause a lot of havoc in the home
ReplyDeleteDamn!!!did u say tiny broom stick on a 8months baby? The guy is very mad in the head,and I'm glad u caught him urself
DeleteGod helped me in catching the bastard the boy that did this to my 8months baby was about 16yrs then. That my girl is 12yrs now I still don't allow my brother law closer her.
DeleteMad indeed o. I even know of two guys that were fingering their 8months old niece till she started bleeding everyday
DeleteMadam its obvious what is been done to your daughter by that paedo of an uncle. What you should do is in the presence of your husband, ask your daughter to say what her "uncle" does to her.
ReplyDeleteAnother suggestion is to catch him in the act by setting up a camera (even with your phone) somewhere hidden he will never see it and deliberately leave your daughter with him. Infact makes sure the place is
private enough for him.
Such a bastard!
Hmmmmm, my advise to u is to talk to ur husband about it not minding if he'll turn against u and say u don't like his family,this is ur child u are talking about and for no reason must u compromise ur stand,so tell him what u have observed even though u are not 100 percent sure and tell him that both of u shld keep a close watch on d so called.
ReplyDeleteAbout inlaws no matter what u do to them they will always say u don't like them so leave whatever they say and concentrate on ur daughter abeg
It caused a lot of havoc in my home but I maintained my ground that the boy will not stay with me again,and he is the lastborn of my hubby.also teach your girl to tell you whenever anyone touches her wee
ReplyDeleteTake ur daugther to a Doctor and if he cOnfirms ur suspision,tell ur husband,he will nt smile bout it,or next tym u c d cousin wiv ur girl in a compromisn situation.
ReplyDeletemy dear why didn't you tell your husband the day your daughter complained? your brother in law has to leave you need to put ur feet on the ground and prayerfully ask ur husband to make alternative accommodation for his brother.
ReplyDeleteAnon 4 If he continues ke???...see rubbish advice oo, she shld test his compliance with her daughter's welfare, I don't blame u, I blame the woman that sent the story, wo madam ur daughter is three, sex can kill her! Don't sit down there n be confused, where r ur motherly-instincts to fiercely protect ur child for God's sake??? don't let fear tie u down and don't take any drastic action that will get u arrested (cc: hot oil) that was my comment btw, just get that man out of ur house NOW and be sure to expose him to protect unsuspecting potential victims i.e people that may want to provide shelter or him. Biko do something now n get up from that computer or whatever u r using to type to send to Stella! Gosh! Pple r evil
ReplyDeleteMadam,y r u takin ur child's wellbeing with levity?don't u know u are suppose to protect her??y dint u take her to d hospital wen she complained?y didn't u mak her talk in her daddy's presence?pls dnt let ur stupidity(which u c as a means of savin ur marriage) spoil her future!
ReplyDeleteIf he dey abuse that baby,Holy ghost fire thunder him head!pls I beg you,tell your husband!if he has d habit of turning things against you,then adopt a new approach.tell him calmly on a day u re both alone and having a nice banter.Don't be forceful or angry!Men protect their daughters!if he says u re paranoid,pls do not argue.just keep quiet and say nothing again about the issue.Bottomline is that u ve sown the seed of suspicion already!it will grow surely.You will be shocked that its your husband that will end up playing sherlock Holmes to get exhibit and evidence on his relation's activities!Meanwhile,you ve to ensure that u make sure interactions between the fellow and your daughter are monitored and totally minimised!Apply wisdom!if u do,ur husband will fight this war!Signed:wide eyed!
ReplyDeleteMadam, I don't care if this cause a divorce between you and your husband. your children safety is your number one priority. I have a 4 and 6 yrs old and i am shaking here just reading this. You have only two choices, a) kick that pedophile out of your house and report him to police or 2). you move out with ur children and housegirl. You have two children in your household that this pedophile is assaulting. you have obligation for the safety of these two ladies (daughter and housegirl). If you don't act fast, you are just ask guilty as that pedophile you harbor in your household
ReplyDeleteHaaa! Madam woman, what is wrong with you? You better put that stitch in time and save 9. Ask your child to repeat same to daddy's face, then call the uncle, he will definitely deny it but at least it could put a stop to it. Sadly, so many kids are abused and they may never speak up. I tell my daughters from the age they start talking not to allow anyone touch them in certain parts of their bodies, I tell them to scream and report immediately. Please mothers, let's not entrust our daughters to any uncle, dont leave them at home with uncle even if that uncle is your own blood brother. These are terrible times and things are really happening
ReplyDeleteMadam pls don't keep quiet abt the whole thing,tell your husband what you've observed pls. Keeping calm abt it is very risky. @least when he sees that your husband is now aware,he might caution himself or even leave the house. Try and protect your daughter in your own little way.
ReplyDeleteDat boy dey mad.see molestation.madam go tell ur husband naa.what ar u waitin 4.
ReplyDelete@Madam Anon,,
ReplyDeletemy advice to you are,,
start pushing or forcing your husband to settle that cosin of his,,etc,like open a little provision shop for him,,2,,with such idea,your husband will respect you including cosin boy and your inlaws,nd advice the boy to face the challenges of life nd be a man of his own house nd you never against him living with u guys,nd also tell him dat he is living without a hope.etc,u must use those words good without hurting him, use a deplomatics words between him nd ur husband,good luck,,from swiss
this is precisely what is lacking in marriages in africa.. COMMUNICATION the marriage had a faulty foundation to start with all down to the woman and now she has allowed it to affect an innocent child.
ReplyDeletewhen it comes to issues such as child molestation,its better to voice your concerns and be wrong rather than trying to be sure before saying anything..
first off she should have mentioned this to her husband while courting because abuse victims left untreated suffer deep seated psychological issues which will continue to degenerate until they do something about it,second being a victim of child abuse she more than anyone should have made her child aware of the clear boundaries when it comes to adults. children dont have any boundaries due to their trusting and innocent nature,so for her to be expecting a 3yrs old child will somehow inform her of what is really going on is being naive at the very least..
studies on child abuse/paedophilia has shown that children are most likely to be abused by someone known to the family or in a position of trust e.g boy scout leaders,football coaches,sunday school/youth leaders,uncles and adult family members even fathers and brothers,family friends e.t.c
lay i beg you in GOD'S name,dont wait for any evidence before you do irreparable damage to an innocent child's life…day after tomorrow monday,take BOTH CHILDREN TO THE HOSPITAL FOR A CURSORY CHECK UP AND ASCERTAIN IF THEY HAVE BEEN VIOLATED IN ANY WAY..
its after this that you can inform your husband of your findings…
This is also for the benefit of those who have children in similar situation,i take GOD BEG YOU PLEASE….also sit your children down starting today if you have not already done so,and explain to them patiently and carefully the barriers that should exist between a child and an adult.
NO MATTER HOW CLOSE THE ADULT IS,IT IS NOT RIGHT TO BE IN A ROOM ALONE
IT IS NOT RIGHT TO SIT THEM ON LAPS OR IN ANY UNCOMPROMISISNG POSITION
IT IS NOT RIGHT FOR THEM TO BE TOUCHED ON ANY PART OF THEIR BODY
IT IS NOT RIGHT FOR KIDS TO BE WALKING/PLAYING ABOUT NAKED EVEN WITH THE HEAT ESPECIALLY WITHOUT SUPERVISION..
ENCOURAGE CHILDREN NOT TO BE SCARED,AND TO FREELY TALK TO YOU THEIR PARENTS
Madam,ist tell ur hubby that u ve discussion with him. 2ndly bring ur daughter to tell her father verbatim what she told u.3rdly call d guy,talk to him den send him out of ur huz. Ur hubby shld get an accomodation for him period.
ReplyDeleteYour story is amazing, how dare you just sit down and do nothing but write Sdk? Is Sdk ur husband or d action you should have taken? Besides, Children don't lie, they say it as it is.. She complained about her wee wee and you didn't respond.. SMH for you.. Even animals protect their offspring like do or die.. A mother hen will fight even a lion that wants to take her chicks.. A word is enough for the wise.. You better take action fast..
ReplyDeleteMadammmmmm! God I feel like screaming through my tab!
ReplyDeleteFrom the very first day you saw him carrying your daughter in such uncomprising position is the day you warn him never to carry your daughter that way ever again.
No offense but why should you be afraid to discuss a serious matter of this magnitude with your husband? This is your daughter for crying out loud.
Since its not gonna be easy talking to your hubby about it as you be stated, and you may not be able to warn your BIL for the fear of your hubby's reaction....
My advice is as follows...
Bathe your daughter yourself...while bathing her and you are about to wash her privates, ask her if anybody had touched her bumbum(vagina...touch the particular spot so she knows exactly what you talking about)
Whatever answer she gives, tell her that if anyone tries to touch her bum, be it uncle (your BIL) or anybody, bite that person very very well ( you can practice the bite with her sef cos it must be painful) and scream on top of your voice....stop touching my bumbum, shout and scream immediately and report to me(you)
This is what I teach my kids...and every other day while bathing her, I repeat same question..did anyone try to touch your bum?
If anyone tries it what do you do??? My daughter repeats ...bite that person very well, scream and report to mummy immediately.
Those who violate your kids are usually those close relations.
Madam please act fast!
MADAM ur daughter is at the mercy of a spoiler, watch out and be very smart.
ReplyDeleteMADAM ur daughter is at the mercy of a spoiler, watch out and be very smart.
ReplyDeleteMADAM ur daughter is at the mercy of a spoiler, watch out and be very smart.
ReplyDeleteTake your daughter to a hospital and have her examined. If the result confirms your suspicion, show your husband the results n tell him your suspicion. Then get that fucking relative out of your house.
ReplyDeleteMadam, mama ijebu has said it all. Firstly, Take your daughter to the doctor for examination. 2. Warn her to stop sitting on her uncle's laps or any other uncle/male asides her dad. 3. Hint your husband, blood is thicker than water, if he loves his daughter and knows the long term effect of sexual abuse, he'll warn his brother sternly or find a way to send him out of the house. 4. Teacher your child this song henceforth, my chest, my vagaina, don't touch, don't touch! Please teach her the name *vagaina* or *private part* not my 'wahetever name(wee etc)' mothers tell their toddlers and tell her to say stop it or I will tell mummy whenever any one (her dad inclusive) tries to touch her there. Some fathers have been reported to molest their daughters.. Be very close to your kids and stop your in-law from that stupid and nonsense comprising position he puts your sisters please! Is he well? -f he is unemployed, can't he find an olosho to finger? Madam, henceforth be closer to your kids and pray for more resources to get a bigger apartment(3bedroom maybe)so he doesn't sleep in the same room as your kids if his brother says he can't send him out. Send the maid to the parlour(get her a mat/foam if u'r up to it) she shd sleep there, uncle in the 3d room,your kids in the 2nd , u and oga in the master bedroom.
ReplyDeleteNote: remember to separate your kids' rooms if they are of different gender, siblings molest each other, 05 centre for children(you can search them on facebook, the child pscychologist will counsel you and your daughter/kids on how to forestall future sexual harassment) has reported such cases.
Let us know how it goes, thank you.
Ladyzee
What type of advice do u need yeye woman how can u even allow any man to carry ur girl on the lap except their father, I have 3 girls and I don't tolerate dat shit from anybody. I can't even accommodate any male in my house except his staying for like 1 week and their father will b around for dat whole week without syeping his foot out of the house, so dat if i want to go to d toilet or kitchen he will be with them. My husband understand me bcos I told him what I went tru also when I was young, so his also scared to accommodate anyone except is not more than a week and he will make sure his around tru out dat week without going out. Pls woman act fast now before is too late.
ReplyDeleteF*ck you and f*ck your marriage, u r just as guilty as the uncle trading ur child's innocence for a title of mrs.
ReplyDeleteIm so annoyed rightnow
Madam send me your home address, the man's name,phone number and picture
ReplyDeleteLmao!
DeleteY? Are u a hired assasin?
DeleteWetin u wan use d guy details for!
U must be a joker!
You don't want your husband to misinterpret what? R u mad? Everyone failed you when it happened to you and now you want to fail your daughter as well. R u insane? You owe that child, you should protect her at the expense of losing that lousy marriage where your husband has been second guessing you for 18yrs,. Even if you had the world's best marriage you fucking raise hell arrest the wanker or have him raped! Yes, pay him in his coin, fuck him up for life and leave with your daughter's life, dignity in place......act now and ask questions later and stop playing denial. Stop acting fuming dumb, how else do u want a 3yr old to express been sexually abused than that. If you do nothing, God punish u! Oloshi.
ReplyDeletemadam pls u have to act fast, tell ur daughter to repeat what she told you in the presence of your husband. If your husband don't believe her, take your daughter away from that house back to your parents house till the guy leave your house. I was molested by my uncle ( my mums brother ) when I was 7.I couldn't tell my mum. my mum suspected it and never allow my sisters and I cosleep with anybod her brother. sadly for me I was raped by another of my uncle when I was 17 .I went to his house after my class 6 to spend some time with him and his family , he took me to his uncomplete building that he was building at the time and did the evil deed , he later gave me some medicine so I won't get pregnant . I feel so ashamed to tell any one , it happened 17yrs ago am married with 2 kids now . I will definitely kill him anything I visit naija .
ReplyDelete.
Please HEED ALL of the advice above and TAKE ACTION!!!!! Coming on blogs to ask questions,when u know the answer is foolishness. Abeg, PROTECT YOUR CHILD!!!!
ReplyDeleteU r a very irresponsible And selfish woman
ReplyDeleteYou have said it all selfcentered
DeleteAs in this is why women fail in africa. We pride our relationship woth our husbands over our own children. And we wonder why the cycle of abuse never ends. I hope this is a fake story becuz if not this woman shud be arrested
DeleteSimple approach him now like u forgot before and say "ehen ehen this girl said u did something that is making her wee wee pain her""I guess mentioning it to him will let him know u are on to him.secondly u must start tellin ur baby not to let anyone carry her. Then whenever he is carrying her show displeasure in ur countenance . Stupid faggot but madam if this doesn't help u must fire for ur daughter o.................don't be selfishly thinking abot ur marriage
ReplyDeletePlease readers I need advice..........my husband keeps malice over everything,but wil only come round if I make the move,but am tired of that ,cos now he keeps quiet after every smal incident. My issue is that he wants to have sex , after which he continues ignoring me. Isn't this sick.
ReplyDeleteHe's abusive!what he's doing is emotional violence!you sef no beg am again!some people like to keep malice.Take the malice to gear 5!He go bow!I cant stand embittered people who claim to be lovers!Divorce him ass if he won't change!Childish!michew!Signed:wideeyed!
Deletei cant believe you have an inkling your child is being abused and you are scared to tell your husband.
ReplyDeleteyour precious baby daughter may be in danger and you eaten, slept, gone to work, had sex, cooked food, gone about your duties in that house without breathing a word to your husband who ought to be your best friend.
YOU MA, ARE A JOKE...
PREACH!!!!
DeleteOh God!!!!! I am so ANGRY with this woman! How can you sit and watch your daughter been abused right under your nose!!! Oh my God! i have tears in my eyes right now! Please madam protect this little girl, i am begging you, talk to your husband immediately and that man must leave your house this minute.
ReplyDeleteDia wnt be any better advice dat d 1's u av bin givn. U av 2 stnd 4 urself nd protect ur children's future wit ur lyf.
ReplyDeleteSome mothers are just useless and selfish..ur 3yr old dota is complaining to u that uncle is making her wee pain her and u did nothing?! What kind of a mother are u? What kind of a mother are u?! U r more concerned about urself than ur 3yr old that is in obvious danger? For all u know he has started rubbing and putting his rotten dick inside her pussy! And u are here asking questions? What kind of a mother are u? I was molested by our houseboy at age 10,my uncle attempted to molest me at age 12 and here u have ur 3yr old in obvious danger of being disfigured psycholigically and emotionally for life and u are still asking questions? What kind of a mother are u?! Madam! If u know what is good for u,don't ever again allow ur 3yr old dota an inch close to ur evil bro inlaw again..don't ever leave her in the house alone unsupervised with ur BIL..don't even trust the househelp alone with him and ur dota.and if anything happens to that girl..May u never know peace for letting such a terrible thing happen to ur little girl under ur very eyes!
ReplyDeleteSeparate your child from the abuser NOW! Tell your husband, be bold and damn all consequences for your childs sake. You have left it too late already! Too late! Pls Visit www.againstchildsex.org and/or facebook.com/theO5Centre to get professional counselling from a child psychologist.
ReplyDeleteWhaat!!! What exactly are you doing here madam? The answers to your questions are staring you in the face and you come here to ask for advice? Are you freaking kidding me??? Is it until your daughter starts bleeding that you'll know something's up? I shudder to think of this cuz I'm a mum like you! That's one reason I cannot even live with relations,be it mine or my husbands',my advice is
ReplyDelete1)Take your child to your husband and have her repeat what she said to you!
2)Take her to a doctor to ensure all is well with her in her "wee wee" area!
3)Speak sternly to her to inform you at any time if anyone goes near or touches her in that area
4)Warn your brother-in-law,do not mince words,be blunt and if possible threaten him and express your "suspicions".my sister,do not handle this lightly
Finally,my sister,you better sit up in your home! It is your home! Its your job to protect those children,stop being "scared" of what your husband might or might not do,there is no time for that!protect those children,that's the priority now! Believe me,if you do nothing drastic in the protective direction,you will never forgive yourself if anything happens to that child! Sit up!!!
That's just my two kobo!
If I were to comment I'ld post similar stuffs as other prudent visitors, therefore its more like repetitions. Madam, with All the sincere and prudent comments on this particular post, I believe you stop prevaricating and come to terms that ur daughter is being Abused by ur BIL! You should protect ur child with every drop of strength in you regardless of how ur hubby understands it. A word for the wise is Enough.
ReplyDeleteMadam... Sorry to say o but ur daughter is being abused! The kind of paranioa I have when I see my daughter on anyone's laps is out of this world, I never ever even let her father bathe her or allow her for holidays. All this paranioa is because I was abused by too many uncle's whilst growing up. Please chuck ur stupid inlaw out ASAP b4 he fucks ur daughter's body,spririt and soul up.
ReplyDeleteMadam... Sorry to say o but ur daughter is being abused! The kind of paranioa I have when I see my daughter on anyone's laps is out of this world, I never ever even let her father bathe her or allow her for holidays. All this paranioa is because I was abused by too many uncle's whilst growing up. Please chuck ur stupid inlaw out ASAP b4 he fucks ur daughter's body,spririt and soul up.
ReplyDeleteI am hoping dat inthe next 24 hrs u will return with news of how u hv chased out dat louse of a BIL.
ReplyDeleteGod help dat u approach a dr like me with this kind of complaint, I will make sure social services does ur job for u.
I am so angry...Madam Anon...r u hearing or reading what you are writing? Would you please open your ears? You simply don't have control over your home. The fact that you couldn't even call your house help to question her suppossed relationship with your in law is disheartening. Would you live in fear all your life? Your daughter claimed she suffers pain when urinating and said uncle, yet you could not reach our for a pestle or omorogun and break his head. I don't know why Nigerians like to behave like Oyinbos...Pls act now...or you will have yourself to blame forever.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteThanks Stella for posting and also to all those who gave useful advise, thanks a million.
I took my daughter yesterday evening to a medical dr. for examination. It was revealed that she has not been tampered with. I was WARNED NEVER to allow her uncle (as he has that intention) or any male to carry her when I'm not present.
Later, in the night I had to tell my husband about the incidents and his reply was that I should remove my attention from such thoughts and that his cousin is not capable of such and even his mother vouched for him before he brought him to stay.
I however maintained my stand and requested that he should ask him to follow him to work during this period that schools are on holidays. He agreed.
Once bitten Twice shy! I have nevertheless been taking my daughter with me anywhere I go if my househelp is not around.
My prayer is that God should not let what I went through to come near my daughter as I still shiver everytime I remember my experience.
Okay madam, I am glad to hear. I'm sorry but your husband is living in denial *typical naija man* please be vigilant next time..
DeleteSend him away. End of.
ReplyDeleteMadam i am soo disappointed in you, you daughter told you that her peepee was paining her and said its uncle, you never said anything, you are not fit to be a mother and if you cant protect your little girl now, then shame on you forever, you are busy thinking of what your husband will say at the detriment of your daughter? Big Shame on you, Hiss.
ReplyDeleteMrs anonymous in reply to your post 65, well done. you have began the correct thing by sending her to the hospital and also speaking with your husband. Keep praying too, nothing God cant do. If it were me, that BROTHER MUST LEAVE MY HOUSE, however i cant judge you as i dont know what your relationship with your husband is. As long as doctor has confirmed the baby has not been tampered with, it would seem nothing of that sort has happened. nevertheless i ask that you be vigilant and be on your toes. on one hand you dont want to say something that damaging that you can never take back against an innocent person. while on the other hand, you cant rest on your oars, thats why i say keep praying and be vigilant. its your home, and you dont have to live like a stranger there. virtually strapping your daughter to your back. its either your peace is intact or nothing else. God will reveal more things to you and can even make things happen to make this individual LEAVE YOUR HOME, if that is your desire.
ReplyDeletekeep praying
I wish I can deliver a HOT SLAP to your face Madam! What sort of yamayama behavior are you exhibiting sef? To hell with anybody's sensibilities; your innocent daughter's life is in danger & you are here worried that your hubby will do what? If you have the slightest hint that the idiot is molesting your angel, is it not to take her to the father & make her repeat what she told you then you & your hubby take her to the hospital for further tests? After waiting for 12yrs for her, a demon possessed guy will then ruin her life?
ReplyDeleteTake your daughter to your hubby & tell her to tell him what she told you (If he decides to believe or not, na him sabi)
Take her to the hospital to know exactly what he has done to her (God willing, nothing damaging)Then take steps to stop her from associating with that guy IMMEDIATELY! Tell him point blank not to touch your daughter ever again & bone whatever your husbands says. Involve family members, make your voice heard & ensure he leaves your house. He is an applicant & @ his age na to crash @ your house? hustling men do not stay with family members, they strike out alone because free house & free food dulls the brain. If your inlaws protest, tell him to go & live with any of them (and see the way they will react...who wants a child molester in his house)
youre a very very stupid woman. may God punish you for this rubbish you just wrote. u r suspecting that ur daughter is being raped and u're there keeping quiet saying trash. u want ur daughters life to turn out like urs abi, that is if u have nt destroyed the girls life already. u want her to be timid and mumu like you abi. God will judge all u women that allow ur children suffer in the name of marriage. am so so pained.
ReplyDeleteHI stella i actually shared dis story with a group called Babes Redefined and a lady wants to contact you. if you ask me please that 29 yrs old parasite / idiot should be thrown out.
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