TOASTER WITH A QUESTION MARK
A man recently joined my church and became a member of my sanctuary unit. His dedication to God's work is so evident that everyone has started noticing his commitment. He arrives earlier than anyone else and ensures the church is spotless before service begins.
A few weeks ago, he asked for my number, and I gave it to him. Since then, he has been calling me at least ten times a day, wanting to know my every move.
A few weeks ago, he asked for my number, and I gave it to him. Since then, he has been calling me at least ten times a day, wanting to know my every move.
At first, I started enjoying the attention because I’ve been single for four decades. He’s also in his fifties, previously married, but his wife passed away childless—at least according to him.
On Valentine’s Day, he specifically asked me to be his date, offering to take me out, but I declined since I’m still observing him from a distance.
Yesterday, he sent me a message saying he needed to speak with me urgently about an emergency. Earlier, I had noticed several missed calls from him, but I was busy praying. When I called back, he declined my call and then immediately called me instead. He asked if I could lend him 20k to sort out an emergency, promising to return it in two days. I told him I didn’t have the money at the moment and asked him to wait. He insisted it was urgent and pleaded with me to help him by the next day.
Now, I can afford to give him more than that amount, but my concern is: how can a single man in his fifties, with no known responsibilities, be asking a woman he claims to be interested in for a loan? If he can't handle 20k, how will he pay bride price? How will he afford diapers for a baby? Or is this just a new scam tactic?
On Valentine’s Day, he specifically asked me to be his date, offering to take me out, but I declined since I’m still observing him from a distance.
Yesterday, he sent me a message saying he needed to speak with me urgently about an emergency. Earlier, I had noticed several missed calls from him, but I was busy praying. When I called back, he declined my call and then immediately called me instead. He asked if I could lend him 20k to sort out an emergency, promising to return it in two days. I told him I didn’t have the money at the moment and asked him to wait. He insisted it was urgent and pleaded with me to help him by the next day.
Now, I can afford to give him more than that amount, but my concern is: how can a single man in his fifties, with no known responsibilities, be asking a woman he claims to be interested in for a loan? If he can't handle 20k, how will he pay bride price? How will he afford diapers for a baby? Or is this just a new scam tactic?
NA LOVE SCAMMER, he has observed that you are lonely...Please do not give him the mone yand run abeg...watch himand other ladies in church cos he will scam them in large numbers and stop attending church...He may have left another church where he scammed dem to join yours......You are wise and smart, others may fall mugu.....
WAIT OH...he probably took someone else out on Vals day with borrowed money and wants to borrow from yout o pay back and will borrow from someone else to pay you
He might not necessarily be a scammer. However, I find it rather strange that he didn't ask from any close friend or family member but chose you instead.
ReplyDeleteAll the same people operate differently, he could truly be in need and have an emergency.
I suggest you do whatever your heart tells you. Even if you give him and he turned out to be a scammer, you helped because you perceived someone was in need
lol. Ndi doubting Thomas. I hail una. That’s how you get scammed. You’ll see red flag and be calling it orange
DeleteI agree with you.
DeleteA real genuine man will NEVER ask a lady, particularly one he is claiming interest in for help. He is trying to scam you and test your desperation levels. A pious man in his 50s suddenly shows up in church and cleans a few times and you are all impressed? The man used that time to scope the joint and find the richest and most vulnerable ladies. Abeg raise your standards.
DeleteCalling that much, doesn't he work?And wanting to know ur every move, that sounds like insecurity.
ReplyDeleteSmooth operator, he joined the church purposely to scam. That his dedication is not real, nah cover up.
ReplyDeleteExactly. He is a serial love scammer. He already targeted you perhaps you might be desperate and fall for his agenda. Then , you would be ashamed to narrate your experience to members.Run
Deletehahhahhahahah
ReplyDeletestella you have finished this man, poster he may have some issues at the moment and needed an assistant. You should have given him that money and use it to stop nonsense from him. send him that money and watch if he will return it back or not. Never lend money you cannot let go to anyone, if you cannot let 20k go should incase he does not keep to his words just give him 10k instead.
Make sure you do not attach feelings to anything for now, just watch him from far before you give in your emotions plus money. He could be in serious need, do not think cos a person is single they do not have needs. Remember the economy is not smiling at anyone for now. Is the man even working?
Should in case is a tautology. You either use should or in case.
DeleteHe can return the 20 k as promised and borrow a higher amount later and japa
DeleteExactly. 20k is just to wet the ground for now. He will surely return it and borrow a higher amount next time. You never chichonchin.
DeletePoster, this is love scam but if you have never experienced it you will not understand the schemes. They say we always learn from experience. Don't be surprised that the scammer will boldly persuade you to take him to your family, Lol .
Endeavor to know where his kids are without directly asking him where they are because this man can persuade kids to tell you what he wants them to tell you.
Buhahahahaha@ Stella's blue pen
ReplyDeleteAnyways madam why don't you go ahead and give him then observe if he will come back for more then u can conclude, I once expererienced that when I was single, but though he was not a church boy, he perceived me to be a rich babe bcoz of the way I package till I find out that the money I sent to him, he used it to take another lady out on a date, I just locked up in giving him money, he came up with few more tricks I refused to fall for that and that was it.
Predatory parasitic men
Delete🤣 Oil dey your head. You are wise. That’s a leech right there. Please forget about him. Very smart of you not to accept his valentine invite.
ReplyDeleteNow, 40 and single? I hope you remember to have a good life balance. You must ensure you are having fun: dressing up, going out, partying and travelling. Feel young and enjoy the heck out of these single days. Until you have done thorough justice to this stage of your life, the next level will wait. Take it from someone who has been there. You don’t need so much religiosity, just practice deep gratitude, generosity, be joyful, and don’t joke with positive affirmations. Leave too much church life. It brings too much judgement and too much focus on what you are lacking.
🤣 Oil dey your head. You are wise. That’s a leech right there. Please forget about him. Very smart of you not to accept his valentine invite.
ReplyDeleteNow, 40 and single? I hope you remember to have a good life balance. You must ensure you are having fun: dressing up, going out, partying and travelling. Feel young and enjoy the heck out of these single days. Until you have done thorough justice to this stage of your life, the next level will wait. Take it from someone who has been there. You don’t need so much religiosity, just practice deep gratitude, generosity, be joyful, and don’t joke with positive affirmations. Leave too much church life. It brings too much judgement and too much focus on what you are lacking.
Run away from that man.
ReplyDeleteBetter ds,like other said he may be a scammer you left other church to prey on another victimon't start what you will regret ,?many of them full Abuja ,thank God that he hasn't started feeding you with contract stories or unfinished project ,they are many looking for single , desperate ladies to be picking their bill
ReplyDeleteA guy moved to my location during my secondary school days, he came and was so committed in church activities to the extent that our priest offered him accommodation in his home and even took over his feedings and other responsibilities. This guy dupped people and disappeared. Nobody knew his whereabouts. It was really surprising to everybody in our area because how could that guy we all knew that loved God do such a thing.
ReplyDeleteI can go in and on and tell you many other scams that comes in this format.
The guy is obviously a scammer. Forget what he told you about his wife, and forget his age, scamming is not by age. Snoop his Facebook account. Don't tell him you intend to check him up on Facebook o.
Which Facebook?
DeleteHe may have different Facebook accounts for different purposes. He would have the one where he claims to be single, no wife's pics.
Even me that I'm a married woman, I have three accounts, one is solely for business, no husband or kids picture.
Performative men and fake behaviour
DeletePlease be wise o. Don't be deceived.
ReplyDeleteI remember one guy I dated on campus, he would asked to borrow money from me, first time I was so mad and skeptical, I thought, "How dare you?"..
ReplyDeleteI came from a girls only family where borrowing or taking money from a lady is a taboo, but I just said, "Well, I'd rather give him what I can afford".. which I would, to my surprise, he'll return it double.
Turned out he was into gambling and he would get lucky everytime.. (that was the only reason I didn't marry him he had every single quality a woman would ask for, we still cool till tomorrow)..
The point is, he may not be a scammer (even though the possibility is very slim.), but give him if you can, but think of it as a way to test his intentions and try his person.
Single for four decades . You women Dey try o. Why are you single for 4 decades? And being in the church and cleaning the church dosent make someone a good person .
ReplyDeleteQuestion mark toaster indeed! calling at least 10 times a day? Him no dey work ni.
ReplyDeleteDear poster If you decide to give him the money don't expect to get it back to avoid being disappointed. You know, Church is like a hospital where you find all manner of individuals. Keep observing him and try to make your findings... He just might be a genuine guy after all
He will return the 20k for sure , so that she can trust him if he comes back to borrow a higher amount.
DeletePoster the signs are there and it is very obvious....Can't you see the red sea, calling you 10 times and monitoring you like you are a child...What else do you expect from him? If you give him the money, get ready because he will keep requesting from money from you that it will become entitled....All these brother brother for church, na tricks full their heads and he was just looking for someone to test his skills on.....
ReplyDeleteDon't fall for his antics; don't borrow him any money....Keep worshipping your God, continue to him and keep it moving.....
For corrections: He will keep requesting for more money till he will stop repaying you...Don't start what you can't finish....Your intuition has already rang the alarm for you...Why take the risk for lending him 20k....
DeleteYour own man will find you; just be joyous and always have a positive outlook to life...Continue your service in the house of God and keep it moving.....
All the best
Exactly! you've said it all Phoenix, that man is a scammer in my opinion..even if he's not, this is the beginning of a toxic relationship..better block him everywhere and avoid him..a word is enough for the wise!
DeletePlease be careful. I am 100% sure he is a scammer.
ReplyDeleteHe might have study from outside and even purposely comes to the Church because of you - be careful - stay away from him but do not make it sudden - because you don't know the kind of person he is. What of if the man is a kidnapper? Be careful
Poster use your head before imagination will finish you. The man hasn't told you that he wants to marry you or proposed, just be calming down so you can see clearly.
ReplyDeleteIf you want to lend him money do it because you want to help him not because he claimed to love you, also have in mind that he not pay you back.
So prepare your mind Incase.
Hope he has a means of income
He doesn’t have any issue. He is a scammer completely. Let me tell you his modus.
ReplyDeleteHe will borrow 20k, and pay back.
Borrow 50k and pay back
Borrow 100k and pay back . By this time , he is fully integrated into your life.
The next step is him asking you to take out a loan in your name or he’ll borrow from you in millions- he won’t pay back. He’ll then disappear.
If you like don’t be wise .
My advice ?. Lend him 20k, and never ask him. If he pays back, you collect. If he asks for 50k next time, still lend 20k if he paid back the last time. If he pays back and asks for 100k, still lend 20k. Never ever go above 20k. I promise you ,You will regret it
This is it!
DeleteDon't lend him any money..he's mostly likely a scammer
DeletePoster don't ignore this advice o o o. Also, pray for revelation and make sure you are not getting revelation from your subconsciousness
DeleteHonestly, I can’t deal with some of these chronicles. The writing is on the wall poster, 🤬
ReplyDeleteAs in! this is so obvious 🙄
DeleteSo Una knows how disgusting it is to bill someone you're not even really close to but funny how you only know this when you're the one at the other end..
ReplyDeleteRubbish behaviour
I just tire for all of Dem SMH
DeleteThis is the massage I sent to the man two days ago.
ReplyDelete**Good evening Sir. Thank your for your care and always calling to check up on me. I thought about your request and concluded that I can't lend you money. I am sorry about that.
End the relationship.
DeleteThis response is mild. You could say you don't have or your family responsibility has caused you not to have saving. With "I can't lend you money," he will know that the money is there but he hasn't convinced you enough so he will go and come back later with another method to convince you with.
DeleteSomeone is possessive and you're thanking him for always checking up on you..please don't ignore this red flag next time.
DeletePoster give him if you have it, maybe he's testing you,he has been calling you,he wanted you for date on Val day,think about.
ReplyDeleteThis is reply first reply.
ReplyDeleteMy life has being very lonely till i meant u and now believing i have gotten a frd rather i got a monster how funny. Always read the word always u are short of it like seriously
Can you imagine?! Hahaha ha 😆 🤣 😅 this man na scammer. He dey look for maga...Bye Felicia
DeleteCan you imagine?! Hahaha ha 😆 🤣 😅 this man na scammer. He dey look for maga...Bye Felicia
DeleteHis second reply.
ReplyDeleteU should have thought abt it.Bible says as many that are lead by the spirit are the sons of God. thinking abt it is fresh, bible says they that are in the flesh cannot pls God romans 8 verse 9 work with God and not on how u think abt issues . read romans 8 v 6 thank u, u are a wicked person. Stingy person. Aka gum
Really, he actually sent those messages? I knew from the beginning of this story that he can never be a genuine man, any man that's not ashamed to ask woman he hasn't given anything is a leech, run away from them.
DeleteWe knew it!. Even quoting scripture join. Watch him try other ladies.
Delete😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteHe purposely came for you with a mission. watch he leave the church. He is fraud.
Lol..
DeleteSame way ladies rant and insult when they ask for 'loan' and you say you don't have..
So you people know it's disgusting but just pretend like it's okay bah..
We all know what we are doing sha
Poster , for him to add bible quotation, he is a scammer. It's their way. He even has anger issues 😂.
DeleteHmmmm
DeleteThese replies tell who he is and his intentions
This man is obviously a psychopath..he is even trying to manipulate you with bible passages..block him ASAP! don't encourage any form of friendship or communication with him...from the way he was monitoring your movements you should have known there's something off about him! Cut him off now!
DeleteHahaha 😆 😂 as maga no pay...Werey dey quote bible wey no relate...Poster guard your heart and your precious money...You see one chance you for enter....
DeleteYou won't see that money to collect if you give him ooo
ReplyDeleteBy the time is to pay back he will just tell you that are you not my Sister In Christ
Except you just wanna give him and use it as Seed Sowing..
Hello iya Boys
I think you should consider Stella 's advice, some years back, there was this guy that newly came to my church then, this guy was handsome , nice and very friendly, he was every lady 's dream. He was also very committed to church activities that In no time, he became the senior pastor's PA. He even got married to a very rich sister then. Not to long after he married her, he left her by then she was already pregnant. We later heard that he usually go to big churches warm his way into people's hearts. Marry the rich sisters and then leave them. If you see him then, there's no how you wouldn't like him even as a man. My sis, watch out he might be a scammer like Stella stated . But you can still do some investigations on him.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, Dante, it’s truly alarming, the ease of condemnation, of name tagging, is a worrisome something, isn’t it? The sheer weight of society’s expectations on men, when they are not our brothers ehn - so overwhelming, so terrifying. But some of us do this on a normal basis. Does that also mean we are scammers?
ReplyDeleteWhile it is a red flag, let’s not get carried away - at least not yet. It is not defining.
Poster, proceed with caution, but if you can afford it and are in a position to give, why not? Just let his perception of you understand you are no better than him; it's all adornments of packaging. Yet, don’t mistake this display of vulnerability for a character reference - maybe, maybe not.
But watch if it becomes habitual - that's when you ring the bell. Since you fancy him in a little way, dig deep to know what he genuinely does for a living - that's where it should start for you.
Now, the real grey area for me - is the serious red flags. He seems possessive - repetitive calling? And his devotion and commitment to the church. And, well, when it comes to church people, I run. Over time, experience has shown that it’s a classic disguise - perfect for dodging accountability, masking personality flaws, and, in some cases, hiding a rather questionable moral compass.
So, tread cautiously. But still, not every such vulnerability is an act to scam or win sympathy to scam. Many are going through a lot.
The other question is why you, and not family or friends? That's something you should allow your intuition to discern. Many more are being isolated by their realities, not by choice but by circumstances and situations beyond their capacities. Be vigilant.
Go up and read the poster comments and you will know that people are right with their opinions about him.
DeleteExactly @your last paragraph.
DeleteI advised my friend yesterday NOT to loan a girl who just came from nowhere asking for a short loan of a huge sum and promising to add interest. I told him, this babe is in her 30s, she has family, she has friends, she has a lot of people her path has crossed in her over 30 years of life, why is it you she just met that she is now asking for this loan from..
Thief..
Nobody is saying that it's bad to lend money to a man and it's not about wether the borrower is a man or not. It is not a gender war thing. You people that haven't experienced or witnessed scamming in your life are the ones who will always sound like this. We know their methods and this is how they come, you can't change that fact. It is what it is. They can even go to the length of marrying the person or the person's relative, and dupe them after one year. They will be searched for everywhere but won't be found. Family members presented will be arrangee.
DeleteThank you slim shady..everything is gender war..that's how the poor girl would have fallen victim to this scammer..who even knows his true intentions? this is a stranger who came out of nowhere..I don't believe that widower tale..this is most likely a married man..a lot is going on these days..everyone should sha be careful out there.
Deletethis using one person's chronicle to answer societal issues is so annoying to me
DeleteThis one na red banner. Sisturr, run oo
ReplyDelete@ Ebony Oge, may God continue to oil your head, though you are not frequent here, but each time you appear hypocrisy evaporates.
ReplyDelete