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Monday, December 11, 2017

America Wonder -The Beginning

Come and see America Wonder!!!





Hi guys, I am starting a new series for the blog. It's about my experience living and working in America for five months. Please follow it up. There would be humor, laughter, confession and a lot of learning and revelation.



Back in the days in Nigeria, I worked for the oil and gas sector. I was a Relationship Manager,in charge of third party offshore/onshore workers. By virtue of my position, I was a senior member of staff, even though I was just around 30. I had passion for my job. I made a lot of money and I met a lot of people. 


One of the funny people I met, a rich Alhaji, asked for a relationship. I refused. He said, "Kai, madam, are you not the Relationship Manager?" I told him I manage employee-employer relationship, not bed and mattress relationship. I still remember his facial expressions. Life was good. I lived well.


 From the benefits of my job, I had a good car, a nice apartment, completed my MSC, afforded foreign trips, took care of my folks and had landed investment. I was happy. 


Then came Buhari. 


There was a lot of changes and new policies that affected the oil industry. We lost the rigs I managed for my company. I had no job anymore. In the course of this job, I got married and I was pregnant. I didn't bother searching for another job. I decided to have my baby and to enjoy my money.

Three months after having my baby, I decided it was time for a paying job. My baby was not paying for sucking my breasts. It wasn't easy getting a new job. I was already at home for eight months. My friends promised to keep an eye out in their workplaces. The recession in Nigeria didn't help either.

Everybody knows their strengths and weaknesses. I was not wired for commercial business. My sisters would say my business would be for charity. I don't have energy to chase debtors.

I ventured into network marketing but I was a new and late comer. Before I would make returns on my investment, my uplines would cajole me into another business. I was getting little changes but I needed more. I tried Vemma, Soluna, Ultimate Cycler and the two criminals - Neolife (because of how they recruit) and MMM (you know the story). In all honesty, I didn't lose money in MMM.


My husband met me as an independent woman. I liked my own money. He was taking care of me but I was not fulfilled. When I told him, I wanted to travel to the US to try my luck, he didn't object. He knew that if he stood in my way, he might come home someday and meet an empty house. I like him for knowing me very well. 


He gave me his blessings and I promised to be back after some months. I wanted to leave the baby with my sister but he refused. All emotional blackmail and new s3xual acrobatics could not change his mind. Baby had to tag along.

We spent a few days in Europe before arriving in New York. At CBP,in JFK, the officer asked me how long I intended to stay. I said one week. If only he knew I have come to stay! How could he ask me how long I wanted to stay in God's own country when I am God's own child?


I took a taxi to Newark. My uncle's house would be my home for a while. I arrived around 3pm and was received by my uncle's wife. She was not happy that I bought 80% of her requests instead of everything.


 When I was in school, I knew that 80% in any examination is excellent but in Iheoma's case, I failed. I told her I didn't have enough money and she said, "onye Oil company?" I told her I was no longer in crude oil business. The only oil I related with was vegetable oil. She was not convinced I lost my job. I opened up to my uncle, and even told him I couldn't afford to pay for excess luggage. 


When my uncle saw me eating four slices of bread and two eggs, he said I was avoiding excess luggage but came to eat excess food in his house. Like joke, my problems started.......


55 comments:

  1. Hahahahahaha this is gonna be interesting and funny.....

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    Replies
    1. Very interesting... please come and complete it

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    2. PLEASE WE NEED MORE. VERY INTERESTING

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  2. "When my uncle saw me eating four slices of bread and two eggs, he said I was avoiding excess luggage but came to eat excess food in his house. Like joke, my problems started......." This really got me. Lol

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    Replies
    1. I can't wait. I heard someone's story and I couldn't believe what people go through. Imagine selling all you have in Nigeria to relocate only to realise you were given a fake house address and the so called host's number was switched off.

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    2. I think ppl replace their hearts with stones soon as they travel out.

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    3. Sweet mother, many people have experienced that. Very painful

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  3. This will be an interesting series nwunye Korks.
    I look forward to following it religiously .

    Why is " meet the inlaws" not regular,is it that BVs dont marry or what?

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  4. But Nne you are Stingy!
    How could you have entered Alabekee " Empty handed???

    You no try.

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    Replies
    1. I JUST WANT TO COMMENT11 December 2017 at 13:45

      Is ur type dat fail exam even after reading...go back n read again

      Delete
  5. Buhari is really not a good man at all. See his name them came buhari... just like then came spider hahahahaha

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  6. Interesting!r u for real 4 slice of bread and 2 egg is dat too much for an adult.smh

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  7. Shines teeth and rubs palms together 😀😂😂😂

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  8. HAhahaha the name alone is something else

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  9. I am waiting to see the visa you used to work, at least you did not tell us you were born in the USA; were you?

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    Replies
    1. If she sees someone to give her papers she can work now. My 4 sisters use my paper to work.

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    2. There are numerous jobs that don’t even require visa sef .... although some of them may not be what you will resort to doing on the norm , lol but when you stay/ live with the kinda family she is about to describe above , you would rather opt to go do any menial job and earn income than sit at home and lose the little respect they have for you before you state constituting nuisance . It is well .... the price of living in obodo oyinbo!

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  10. Buhari oooo travel travel oo onye mbughari.

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  11. lolz some part is funny but i pity d poster somehow shaa. Stella biko the continuation.

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  12. Hahahahahahahahahabababahbssh
    I like this post
    Stella please number it.
    So that if I miss it, I'll easily go back to the number I missed.
    This is AMERICA WONDER 1😂😂

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  13. Oh I love this. Please come and continue oo

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  14. Wow. I'm going to love this.

    Nice one SDK. It's getting more interesting.

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  15. This will be interesting.....

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  16. See me lol real good.... I'm loving this already. I like your style of writing and the comic patches.
    Your last paragraph is dope jare. Will definitely follow this series.

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  17. Love it? No! I can't help but feel pity for the poster.

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    Replies
    1. Honestly. People believe abroad is automatically heaven. Good luck to her sha

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  18. This is going to be a very interesting read. Part 2 ooo am very curious

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  19. Please come back quickly and finish this tori abeg you in the name of God.

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  20. Choi.... i am so going to love this.... maybe i will post my experience too over there. My sister turned me to her househelp....

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  21. i'm already loving this. Let me not even tell my own story. My own uncle's wife said that since I came to her house, she has not known peace in her husband's house. She heaped lies on my head. Now, that I have left, she is regretting. She bin wan dey use me as nanny. I look at her now and say NTUO in my mind

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ahhhh.did I type this?
      No no no I didn't but my case is almost similar but worse.

      Delete
  22. LMAO!!!
    This sounds like a jolly good writer!
    Hurry with the part 2,biko.

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  23. This is going to be interesting..
    Make sure you finish it oo

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  24. This is going to be very interesting... I await more

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  25. Princess Scheherazade11 December 2017 at 16:22

    Lol. Looks like I'm going to enjoy this one.

    This Buhari tho. Just come use him awilo spoil everybody blues. Mtchewwww.
    Bad market.

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  26. I like this but my people abroad is not an easy something. If you meet anybody in USA or UK that lives alone in a house or apartment, just know that person is very rich because he or she will be spending around 2k dollars a month.
    So ladies this Christmas season, any abroadian that tells you he lives alone in a 2 bedroom apartment or house, my dear hold am tight because money dey.
    That is more than what most of you people pay per year where you live.

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  27. I enjoyed reading this...

    Poster pls come and finish it 😁

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  28. My aunt that I stayed with one day locked me out of the house.
    I came back from night service, she had already slept and locked the door and left her key in the door, so I couldn't open it with my key.

    I rang the bell, she tiptoed to the door, she saw it was me, sighed and went back to bed.

    That day, in winter, I slept in my car. 2 months later I moved out. Went to sleep 4 people in one bedroom.

    I don't speak to her anymore, but she is trying to come back into my life. Never!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Forgive her o. Shit happens. Forgiving someone no mean say you go dey open teeth with am

      Delete
  29. This should be interesting.
    Biko come and finish this story.
    No put us for suspense.

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  30. This would be interesting.

    Poster, come and finish this story.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Wow! This will be an interesting series...wanna learn about life in the US of A.

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  32. The only advice I’ll give about “D abroad life” is don’t be deceived by what you hear or read or d pictures you see. If you have a job in Naija, kindly remain there. If you have kids and have to work too, you’ll almost be depressed. If it was possible for me to get a job in Naija now, I’m so coming back. But for now lemme manage and get by. Plenty stories, lots of promises looking bleak.........

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  33. The only advice I’ll give about “D abroad life” is don’t be deceived by what you hear or read or d pictures you see. If you have a job in Naija, kindly remain there. If you have kids and have to work too, you’ll almost be depressed. If it was possible for me to get a job in Naija now, I’m so coming back. But for now lemme manage and get by. Plenty stories, lots of promises looking bleak.........

    ReplyDelete
  34. I'm loving this series already. Please, please and please if you can eat at least two square meals in 9ja, if you have family that can fend for you or you have a spouse and kids, don't even dream of relocating abroad especially the US and UK to become an illegal immigrant.

    I had to relocate because my husband whom I've know since we were in our teens, moved to the States with his praents years ago on lottery and became a citizen years later. If I had a choice, I'd have remained in 9ja but marriage brought me here. Life is going fine for us, to the glory of God but career wise, i'm not where I wish to be yet.

    Now, i've heard stories of people who left their fantastic life in 9ja and moved here, don't have residency status and life is difficult for them. Forget that they may be working o, yes illegal immigrants can get a job, ofcourse illegally, because it is illegal to work without a work permit, but if many of them want to be truthful with you, the life they live now is nothing compared to how they were living in 9ja. And when they move here, the people they think would help them are not forthcoming.

    And don't blame the people you came to meet here, electric bill, rent/mortgage, phone bills, credit card bills, school loans(if any), utility bill (i.e. water, sewage, gas, trash etc.), car note( if you leased your car), auto insurance, health insurance(as a result of Obamacare that made it compulsory or you pay a fine), school loan(if any), internet, cable TV(assuming you have cable) are bills that come in steadily monthly, and there are still more o depending on the individual . Failure to pay, there's no room for begging. So you now want to come and add your own burden to them when you had a fantastic life in 9ja. You sef pity them nau.

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  35. See what Buhari have caused now. From living large to receiving unnecessary insults over four slices of bread. Na wah. Mbok

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  36. See what Buhari have caused now. From living large to receiving unnecessary insults over four slices of bread. Na wah. Mbok

    ReplyDelete

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