This is what will happen..If you read and any gist posted really cracks you up,please comment but the final voice will be Blog Visitors Iphie Dearie and The Generals wife....They will choose the winning gist.
Winning gist must be original and flawless..Na my 5k so i got to be tough with letting it go....*side eyes @Moneymaker LMAO!*.
So if you do not win,not my fault,blame Iphie and The generals wife..
If However there is no winning gist then no wahala!
Next week,i will nominate one or two people to choose the winning gist.
Have a fun filled Saturday.I will soon take a Nap..LOL
Waiting...
ReplyDeleteWaiting for comments
ReplyDeleteWaoh,waiting for gist
ReplyDeleteHanhan where are the gists?
ReplyDeleteThis should be fun,hehehe
ReplyDeleteMay the best man win, OK I'm ready for some laffs😂
ReplyDeleteLooool! It means our vote doesnt count na.I don't understand O......why should we comment or vote if the final voice(s) goes to iphie/tgw? Someone make me understand. Linda eze/sisi eko epppp........
ReplyDeleteSHantelle
Are you minding Stella? Which one is choosing people that'll have the final say? So why then should we vote? Abegi!!!
DeleteLmao na so na. She say those Bvs have the final say on the winning joke. Eheh
DeleteMy people make I nack you one tori, Some years back we had this thermocool fridge and one crude house help frm saki, as little as we are den,we knew once you dont wear your slippers and you have water in your hands the fridge will shock you slightly.This our househelp was new na so she use hand wey get water open fridge for d first time,D Fridge shocked her,she come dey follow the fridge talk,fi mi si le,oun ri mi,leave me alone na,it is tickling me,she dey call us say make we see say fridge dey hold her hand, We laughed na so she come report to mum say fridge dey hold am too much. One time mum rake warned her not to touch fridge wt water hand again.
ReplyDeleteSo funny that I forgot to laugh.
DeleteIt's funny HahAha
DeleteVery funny joke,mmee
DeleteThe hustle for 5k.
ReplyDeleteNo its not about 5k. Its about bringing laughter and joy to others by sharing a funny gist. Don't say things that will make others hesitate or shy away from sharing genuine funny stories. Don't be a kill joy honey😊😊
DeleteBlog partiality..issorait.
ReplyDeleteI DO NOT AGREE WITH THE CHOICE OF CANDIDATES DELEGATED FOR THIS ASSIGNMENT
DeleteAnd why is that anonymous? Please tender your reasons to the house. Lol
DeleteMake we read gist since we don get people wey go choose.
ReplyDeleteLet me quietly exit this post.
ReplyDeleteCuddling my teddy bear in this weather seems more interesting. Am I the only one in love with a fat man?
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Errmm...answer to ur kweshion, but since u re already on ur way out.... K'ọdị bazịa nụ
DeleteMaybe...unless the fat man has very deep fat pockets and a very good somtin down below
DeleteLemme share dix wit u,it happened to me while growing up.i usually bed wet,so my dad took it upon himself to b waking me up to go nd once I'm fast asleep..let's I forget I love to sleep naked.on this faithful day my dad came to wake me up as his daily routine,I woke up feeling sleepy..that's how I left d house naked nd found myself under d bridge...regained my senses wen I noticed it was late nd evrywhere was quite.meanwhile my street have been in pandemonium.them think say dem Don kidnap me...wenever I remember I go laff tire.
ReplyDeleteUr own don finish 4 ds blog, dy will use ds bedwetting ish to finish u if u cross their path.
DeleteYou walked out of your compound naked? Sorry I'm confused
DeleteWhat manner of fuckery is this? Which kain yeye lie be this? All because of 5k?? Babe fear God na.
DeleteLmao @sassy. But Blessing you're such a jagajaga liar, naked? Found yourself under the bridge? Ah may God forgive you. African liar.
DeleteLwkmd @ African liar. Today na today.
DeleteShe said when she was younger, olodo, i had a neighborhood like that too, she sleep walks, and was once found inside the gutter.
DeleteU had a neighborhood ke?I die
Delete
ReplyDeleteYou know how when u like
a particular outfit, d
day u wear it u'll want
everybody to see u in
it. Even if u no get
anywhere to go u go
sha want to go and
visit somebody at
home. So I went to my
bf house in this my
outfit, met his sister
who told me he wasn't
home so I left. The
following day he was
to come see me at
home...so I waited
didn't see him. He now
called me to pls go to
his house and wait for
him dat he popped out
with his dad. I come
go wear d dress again,
went to his hoiuse, met
his sister again...small
shame catch me
say,his sis will say
weda I no sleep for
house d day b4, but I
didn't mind,I do ogboju
rough am. I waited for
my bf sotey he no
come house. I had to
leave. So like 3days
after he begged me
and told me he had
been running too much
errands for his dad.
That this time around
make we go play for
restaurant eat. Again I
wear this dress, cos I
say by fire by force
this boi most see dis
dress sha.. We finally
lounged and played all
day. Time to go home
reach, he said we
should wait, that his
sister will come pick
us. Ahhh I say oh noo
lai lai let's be going
ourselves o. He said
ahn ahn why naw,
looking surprised.
Long story short as we
begin debate am...who
drives in? Na dis aunty
again ooooo...making
it the 3rd time in d
same outfit in one
week. Yepa!
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. At least he finally saw the outfit.
DeleteLololololol.
DeleteI don laugh tire.
You are a dirty person.I'm sure you wear one bra for two months and one pant for one month.Ewu gambia.
DeleteChai sorry ooooo. It happens to me too, when I wear better cloth I will go round and greet everybody wey I sabi o.
DeleteLmao! Funny gaan
DeleteBut u sef don share dis gist here b4 nah? Abi u copied someone else's gist?
Sorry to burst your bubble, this story ain't yours, but it's funny sha, laffed hard the first time I read it.
DeleteSeen this story... Oh embarrassing moments
DeleteYou sure cracked me up.
DeleteHahahahaha,has happened to the best of us jare.
DeleteDis gist is not yours, have read it here b4.... thief thief gist
DeleteLmao
DeleteYou have my vote
Oh my goodness. It is today I know that people do copy and paste. It was I who posted this gist in one of the "most embarrassing moments" on this blog in 2013. I swear on all I live for that this gist was posted by me, although as anonymous back then. It happened to me when I was in secondary school. This was posted 3years ago nah. Oh my God!!!
DeleteHere's the link to the post.
http://www.stelladimokokorkus.com/2013/08/most-embarrassing-moments.html?m=1
I even referred to this story again not too long ago under one thread, I don't remember which now. But I'm not saying this to get anything o, I'm just letting u know that this is my story. No hard feelings. And I'd vote for 'u' since u reposted here. Winks
DeleteThis happened to my friend yesterday
ReplyDeleteShe boarded a keke. Before long, another passenger boarded. He priced the fare to 50naira and the driver agreed. Along the way, he started talking of how Buhari is a good man and how the people around him were making governance difficult for him. This apparently annoyed the keke driver who then said in Jonathan's regime, things were not this bad.
The man,ignoring the driver continued talking about how good buhari is,praising him to the high heavens. so unable to take it anymore the keke driver stopped and ordered the man out of his keke.
The man thought it was a joke ooo, na im he still balance for the keke. The driver repeated again "I say comot for my keke "
The man sat down there looking unperturbed so the driver went down to his side of the keke to drag him down. The man resisted and a scuffle ensued. Before long,they both fell into the deep gutter by the side of the road.
At this point, my friend picked her bag and walked away.
I don't know if I narrated it well but it was darn funny. Buhari and Goodluck dey house while people wey dey suffer dey fight for them.lol
Lol...This cracked me up badly.Woulda voted for you but as our vote doesn't count na,there's no need.Side eyes@ Stella.
DeleteThe keke man don vex say he dey buy Fuel for black market N3k for 5ltrs and one mumu will be singing Buhari praises. Yimu
DeleteI laughed all thru.. lol
DeleteMy first time here
ReplyDeleteWelcome Ruphina, u will love it here especially if you love drama...
DeleteWelcome dear. There are different types of people on this blog o. Let me not mention names sha. Just take note of Queen and Boss of this blog.
DeleteReading comments
ReplyDeleteLooooooool @ shakiti baby!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHahahaha...really cracked me up...i can relate
ReplyDeleteStill laughing over the April fool I did to my parents. In the morning around 3am naim I get up come begin shout: Jesus Jesus I can't breathe help'. Naim my papa and mama jump comot for their room enter my own oo. My papa carry me go sitting room,they shout, 'holy ghost fire, holy ghost fire, bring the. Anointing oil'. My mama dey shout,'dem wan kill my pikin oo, oya receive the breadth of life'. Naim she blow breath of life for my body. Choi! Early morning breadth of life bring sickness by force. My younger ones don dey fire prayers dey bind devil already. Laff hold me sotey I manage talk sey na April fool oo. My parents been no understand at first. Immediately dey understand, my papa rush inside go carry cutlass come. I tear better race. Na so him dey shout'go carry husband come oo. If u no bring husband no near this house'. Laff finish me. But make una sef note sey assuming I try this thing for the kain house wey I come from, dem for don kuku kill me. Na April we still dey so APRIL FOOL EVERYONE. Hehehe
ReplyDeleteLmao
DeleteVery funny
DeleteHahahahahhahahaha...I live this. Nice one boo.
DeleteHahahahahahahah
DeleteStella can we laugh under more than one gist; do they count?
Very funny
DeleteHahahha very funny
DeleteAbeg just give me d money I need it like madt b4 I begin chop for dream
ReplyDeleteThis happened in Secondary School. You know how we girls used to form ajebutter back then, claiming to live in beautiful houses with rich relatives and telling all sorts of lies to back up our fake lives. I had friends who lived in G.R.A confirmed because I normally followed them home. I lived in another part of the state in a face me I slap you compound. The house was an uncompleted building without toilet and bathroom, we used to bath in one make-shift structure at the backyard and do 'shot-put' from there when we poo.
ReplyDeleteWell I lied that I also lived in a beautiful house on the street and that my dad does not allow friends to visit me so they won't spoil me. Whenever friends followed me home, I will point at the beautiful story building and tell them to go back that I want to pass through the back gate. Meanwhile my house was at the back of the this beautiful house, so I would just take the path around the fence and and go to my house.
I did this for 3 years until one day when I fell sick and could not go to school for days. About 4 of my friends gathered themselves and came looking for me, I had just finished defecating at the backyard and was carrying the sh*t inside nylon to throw into the bush when I saw them coming along the path, it was too late as they already saw me. I dropped the shit on the ground and ran inside. They came to the house and asked of me. One woman said 'she dey for backyard, she go sh*t' another said 'she don run enter inside now now'. My friends were shown our door and they came to knock, they knocked and called me for about 20minutes, I did not respond, thank God my mum was out to get some things. They left. I did not return to that school. I later heard that on the fateful day they had gone to the beautiful house to ask of me, the occupants told them that there was no body attending that school in the house and that they should turn round the fence and check the house at the back.
Hahaha
DeleteHahahaahahahahhahaha ewooooo
DeleteReads like a scene from Jennifa's diary...
DeleteThis your lie nawa o.So you didn't return to school because of that,what then did you tell your parents that made them agree to change your school? Abeg find another lie.
DeleteEya. Can relate. I had a friend who always used our place to entertain her school friends cos their house is not fine. I always collect money from her sha. Nothing goes for nothing
DeleteForming forming...you, my dear, u be transformer.
DeleteBut you are not alone.
DeleteMy younger sister likes to form too
Choi... Casting
DeleteThis is definitely culled from Jenifa's Diary. Kai! People can lie sha!!!
DeleteThis happened to me on Tuesday. A woman of God precisely my roommate's mother gave me a vision when we went visiting during the easter period. She also told me to do seven days fasting. So I decided to start on Monday.
ReplyDeleteIt was all good on Monday, and then Tuesday came. Na there my tori start oo. My roommate bought plenty banana for her boo when we came back and since then the boo had been postponing his visits so the bananas were gradually getting bad. Na so I bath finish that day come enter room, the bananas were just staring at me, mind you, I like bananas pass monkey sef. So I went straight to her and said "babe, this banana them nor dey chop am sef? as the person wey get am nor was chop am so, make people wey dey alive chop am na" then she said "leave am there, longthroat, the thing dey bite you there?". I now started preaching to her that the bananas will eventually get bad and she will end up throwing everything away, then she said "abeg chop if you won chop, I don tire to keep am sef" before she could finish her statement, I had already finished one cos my tummy was already rumbling, when eating, I said "chai, this banana sweet nor be small". Then I grabbed the second one, that was when my roommate tapped me and said "wait ooo, I think say you dey fast that time, abi you Don break? Na there my brain format ooo, I come dey cry and laff at the same time. My roomie laff me nor be small. I finish the tears for my eyes that day cos the fasting was quite a serious one. Long throat nor good I swear.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteDirty thing
DeleteLol@Shakiti baby,i'v read that story twice as @ last year. Please write were you culled it from. We do not want the owner to come here and sue you for plagiarism.
ReplyDeleteSHantelle
The writer dey here o. No be last year sef. It was 2013 I shared it. I post the link up there. Lol
DeleteSisi eko! Stfu with this ur over sabi, u have said it up there already, who is fighting with u. Eat the gist nah, mumu!
DeleteAhahaha so why go anonymous to respond na? Yea I said it up there and I'll repeat it again, did I ask to be rewarded? So wetin dey pinch u? Idiot!!!
DeleteHow do i start ok some years back one electrician in my hood had an apprentice and the apprentice was staying with him they go for jobs together and all. One day the apprentice stole from the electrician and ran away but was caught a few days later and was publicly flogged and disgraced after the incident the apprentice travelled out of the hood no one saw him for like two or three months when he resurfaced dudes in the hood were like etete e don tey o where u de hide and he was like i don change name my name no be etete again my name na innocent. Cracks me up everytime i see him.
ReplyDeleteMy fellow bvns, I wan gist una watin happen to my sister wen she finished from secondary school in 1999 o. She went for valedictory service which my mum never allowed cos she was strict. So she had to lie dat dia teachers asked dem to come. To cut d long story short, five nack, my sis never come back na in my mum provoke begin pace upandan. Finally wen she come, male just follow her enter, lock door com begin beat her, trust teachers. Na in my sister remember say her boy friend promised to check on her later dat evenin, na in my sister change o, she com begin say mum, I cant breathe well aagin o, I cant breathe well again, na in male begin shout, make una help o, na so she start to pour cold water ontop her on top bed. Na so male stop d beating o, begin care for my sister com turn me to slave o, na in I begin clean n clear d room, before I sleep hen, hnnnm, d boy friend come o, na in my sis tell am say she faint wen she reach house say she no no watin cos am, she no geee confess say na. Beating oooo. Anytim I remember hen, na life I just dey lafg.
ReplyDeleteWhy does it have to be Tgw and iphie? Because so far you do not belong to Nne kedu clan, nothing for you
ReplyDeleteBitterness kills. Rejoice with others when they are on top,so that you can also get to the top.
Deletesimple rule of life.
Hello every body, make I join the queue to win 5k this time no be beans even if you ask person for money they go ask you who you epp. My tori happen 3 days back, I go hustle for fuel I left home early in the money so they go quick sell for me. Na so I drag my I pass my neigbour go join queue I no eat nothing, like around 1pm I come say make I find food chop I enter one buka the food seller say na only beans and plantain dey I come order eat go join queue fastforward to 3pm e remain small make e reach my turn, my intestine come de fight wrestlemania 35 I no fit hold body I just de mess any how. I enter bike make I run go house, na so I just de fart I notice say the aboki don notice wetin de happen but still I just de misfire on per second billing. The last one wey come out the aboki park e come say' mai' meaning wetin! I said nothing e come start to de quarell say me I dey back de suffer am since if I no say I get problem for my belle make I go hospital I no even fit argue na so I ran enter my compound. Peace!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI don't know why enjoyed this story.
DeleteOK, here goes my gist.
ReplyDeleteI had being at boarding school for barely a term (fggc imiringi) and I was not coping well, I spent every night crying for my mother to come and rescue me from hunger, punishments and wicked seniors, chai. Woke up one morning and saw my fellow toads (js1) with patches on their heads, I asked what happened to them and they told me how they were tricked into yellow house by some of our classmates and shaved by seniors. The seniors were giving ugly unequal haircuts to junior students with bushy heads. I laughed and mocked my mates all day, not knowing my turn was coming. That same evening as we were prepping for night prayers a js2 student came up to me and told me my school mother was looking for me in yellow house, Mumu like me I thought food was coming my way so I snuck out while they were gathering for prayers only to reach yellow house and see my other bushy haired classmates sitting on the floor and crying.I tried to do an about turn, a u-turn but no escape my people.one senior dragged me by the neck and started her work on my head, when I started crying she told me I was lucky that she was using a shaving stick she had only used once. One senior was laughing and her sweet fell down into all the hair on the floor and one particular toad laughed so loud, naim the senior as her to lick the sweet o...it was horrible then but funny now
448176...
Pls report this to the school authorities,they are spreading Hiv and hepatitis.
DeleteWicked seniors!!
DeleteOk, I and my hubby visited his friend, we were all chatty with his wife and daughter of 4yrs. They brought coke and chin chin for us; while on it, the little girl ask the mum to come inside the room that she would want to tell her something. The mum was hesitating but later went inside minutes later, she came out laughing. Told us the daughter told her that I quote "mum, I know you asked me not to be collecting things from strangers but please help me and tell uncle and aunt that I like what they are eating" we laugh eeh. Chi Austin.
ReplyDeleteHahahaha. Smart child
DeleteHello house, hope you're all doing great. This gist happened years ago on Ayonuga str. In Fadeyi, Lagos, but it is a gist that is still retold to accompanying laughter whenever and wherever: one cool evening, a sweet-looking lady, reeking of class and breeding was walking a fine English dog on a leash ( can't recall the exact breed). She was forming "jand" and all what not, and turning quite a few heads with her poise and carriage, and even the little manner less dog was also acting the "class script".
ReplyDeletepeople must have been wondering if she came from abroad or so, as she walked the street, oblivious to all around her.
All of a sudden, the street was thrust into drama, rib-cracking drama: from nowhere, three wretched dogs burst onto Ayonuga str. In all their ghetto glory, and made a beeline for "miss tushed up" and her 'oyibo' dog, barking and snapping at them with open mouths and dirty teeth. At first the lady was acting all calm and collected, trying to control the situation, by calmly pulling her dog in to herself and trying to talk off the crazy dogs to the admiration of most people. Suddenly one of the dogs snapped at her, drooling germ-infested spittle and then all hell broke loose:
The lady abandoned her dog and leash and took off in an Olympic sprint but it was not the running that got people doubled over in fitful laughter ( from safe distances by the way). It was what she was screaming at the top of her voice as she fled.... In thick, native Yoruba language the ajebo-forming lady was screaming, WODI META OOO, WODI META OOO, WODI META OOO!!! (them be three ooo, them be three ooo, them be three ooo!!!). The accompanying laughter still rings loud and clear a decade plus later.
incase I win, this is how to identify me : my phone no (mtn) line is 0806****189. I am male, tnx.
Hahaha, I laughed well
DeleteYou won't believe I already typed this story, and just when I wanted to click publish my battery went off. Had to change the battery. So sad but lemme give it another shot...
ReplyDeleteThis happened way back in sch, at that time I was in Hnd2. I had this hall mate that can form for Africa. Lets name her miss B. Then came a day one spirikoko( extreme born again xtain)lady in our hall invited us for a vigil in her church, we all decided to go since the church wasn't far from the house and because we held the lady in high esteem.
Then the day came and we were in church, during praise and worship missB was busy forming gbogbo big girl, rather than dance away her sorrows she'd rather adjust her clothe, clean excess lip stick below her lips etc. Then the time came for the sermon and missB eyes were already turning red. I could remember the usher woke missB up like 3 to 4 times during the sermon and kept using scope to put herself together. Anyways it was time for prayers and the pastor asked us to pray in any position we like. That was how my friend went and knelt down in the middl... I mean the passage way in the church and bowed her head pushing out her buttocks in all its glory. The prayer ended and we were asked to sit down, we all did but missB was still right there in the middle SNORING mildly... All eyes were on her, the usher then moved close to her and tapped her, na him my friend begin to dey shake head as if she was praying. Come see as everybody scatter body begin to dey laff...( lol) na him the usher talk say and I quote" the prayer has ended sister" instead make my friend humble herself she begin to dey para" cant someone pray again what is all these blah blah blah" Wo the embarrassment Wey follow no be here o infact I carry shame on her behalf.
I hope I win though hopefully Stella will double or triple the money. Winks...
Lol
DeleteAnd I really laughed out loud.
DeleteThis cracked me up
DeleteYou win. I laughed hard
DeleteStella pls post my story, the fadeyi dog gist, it's a true story, pls. I have urgent need of that #5000, pls I ask of u in Jesus name... Amen.
ReplyDeletelols @waterlily. i can relate.
ReplyDeleteSome girls back then were also bursted after forming for the whole school. Bv Waterlily, your gist made laughed hard.
ReplyDelete