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Thursday, August 27, 2015

I Wish Someone Had Told Me ........Part 1

There are things i wish I knew before i took the plunge.....




...Took the plunge Marriage wise!

I wish someone had told me before i got married how much of ones privacy that one loses...

How everything that used to be 100 becomes 50-50 and sometimes even less.....

How doing things spontaneously is no longer possible....

I have been married for 12 years and I have coped well but in the beginning it is scary how ones life changes all in the name of love..

Some people cannot handle these changes and cannot adapt and that is why you see a couple running away from Marriage a short time after signing the dotted lines...The love they used to share practically breaks down and cannot stand the changes.

Marriage is sweet BUT it is not easy and i will personally whoop anyone's ass who comes here to say it is...

I love where i am right now and i wouldn't wish for anything else but i still wish i knew somethings before hand concerning the coming together of man and woman,for better for worse.

What about you?what did you wish you knew before you got married?



Part 2 of I wish someone had told me coming up tomorrow dealing with another very important topic.







260 comments:

  1. In the nick of time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmmmmmm
      Sit down look things!
      Nothing to say 4 now.

      Delete
    2. Marriage is a school u can never graduate from. There is always something fresh to learn out of it. I can't claim to have known everything before I got married but I have learnt a lot and I have also changed a lot through d course of my married life.

      That's d beauty of marriage. It is not easy but it's wonderful when u stay strong for better or for worse. And then with God as d foundation...wow, what could be sweeter?!

      Pls visit my blog mitchelleobatu.blogspot.com and read 'what u need to know before u say I do...'

      Delete
    3. Stella tie #50 popcorn for me
      I'm not married so I'll read comments

      Delete
    4. Ehm, even that 50/50 doesn't stand. I found out the hard and funny way. @the early stages of our marriage, took hubby's atm card and withdrew money for personal use without telling him. When he found out, he was pissed! And became speechless when I told him I thought what belongs to him belongs to me as well! Lmao!

      But marriage is sweet sha. Pray for wisdom n understanding, and apply them daily!

      Delete
    5. So many things I wished I had known before now.
      Oh my God, I refuse to feel bad cos of this.
      #PenDropped #WishingForAGlassOf...

      Delete
    6. I wish some one had told me that doing two abortions might lead to certain infertility issues later in life. I wish I didn't do it. Who knows it might not be the problem we have bin trying to concieve but nothing yet nd we haven't gone to the hospital yet. Oh God of Elijah. Please forgive me. I am deeply and truly sorry for my sins. I wish I had listened to my parents and kept away from that ex-boyfriend. God am in tears please bless us with the fruits of the womb in Jesus mighty name Amen. Don't judge me u are not God.

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    7. Young woman abortion is not the cause of your infertility. Stop judging yourself. Let go of the past. Ask God for mercy and trust him to give his children good gifts. Also seek medical help too just to be sure all is well and how to pray.
      U will carry ur baby

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    8. Annon:17:06 you and your husband should visit the hospital for proper check-up before blaming abortion. God will hear your cry soon. It is well.

      Delete
    9. I wish someone told me before I became an adult that it wasn't going to be easy being one. Sometimes I feel like giving up. I can't give up now. I've come too far from where I started from. Nobody told me that the road will be easy. But I don't believe he has brought me this far to leave me. I decided to stay off relationship cus it wasn't turning out well. I decided to enjoy my single hood. I am 25yrs old. I worked my bot off for my business to succeed but I failed. This is the second time I am failing in business. I am back to my parent's house in ph. Eating there food and sleeping on my sister's bed. I am down to ground zero. No boy friend, no business and no job. Broker than I ever started. But I wouldn't give up. I will get married and I will success in business. No matter how many times I fall I will dust myself and start again.

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    10. Is better you go to hospital and have a check up...I did four God forgave me and I got married and conceived. ...pray to God he ll ans...make sure u go to the hospital. ...

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    11. @anon 17.06, don't worry God is in control, just keep taking your folic acid daily, u did not state how long you ve been trying, otherwise I would have ask you to see a doctor to know if there is an issue. Our God is a merciful God, keep praying, relax and enjoy sex with your husband. Remember your folic acid.

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    12. oloshi, don't judge you kor.... na person send you abortion do?? taaaaasa dia!

      shebi wen some young girls decide to keep their own, na your bastard hypocrite type dey mock dem or call dem after one, you never see anything yet!

      nonsense!

      Delete
    13. Anon 17:06 from where I'm standing there's no one judging you but your conscience.
      P.S: if someone tells you what you did is wrong , that is not judgement. Judgement is me telling you, that you did d wrong thing, you'll go to hell and God is punishing you for it. That is judgement. The way we also treat our kids or younger ones when they err (we tell them d wrong and PUNISH THEM that is also judgement).Please dont worry, so far you have asked for forgiveness He will forgive. You're actually compounding your problem with the worry. Relax, Gos is in control.

      Delete
    14. I don't regret doing abortion one bit. I would have been a terrible mum and taken it out on my child. I loved my child no doubt. Ok I wish I gave birth to my baby and dropped her/him in a motherless baby home. Bringing up a kid isn't child's play especially when ur broke and the person that did it is in denial. After the abortion I said bye bye to sex. Good radiance to bad Rubish. No more Yeye bf.i am not ready for the consequences of sex.

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    15. All am very sure of is most i wish today,tomorrow and forever is gonna base on ,I wish i never marry my husband or date my bf .....Oya make i start dey read my husband dis my boo dat!!!!!! Lmaoo *Trueeeeeeee......

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    16. @ anon_17:06, our God is a God of second chance. Believe me when I tell you that he has forgiven you, all you have to do is to forgive yourself. Its in the past leave it there and look up to a brighter future, where you will be playing round with your kids. Keep hope alive!

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    17. My dear , don't best yourself up. , it may not be the cause, God is wiser than man, I married as a virgin and I am ttc so it's not always about the abortions u did before or the errors of the past.

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    18. Marriage is an institution ordained by God and it's no surprise devil hates it. "For better for worse" are words only few pipu understood. We pay more attention to wedding than to the marriage. Pipu forget that wedding is just one day, marriage is supposed to be for life. What we have today is mainly marriage of convenience, e.g she's beautiful, he's well connected and has money. He's got a good job, he's a xtian, her parents has money, he/she can fuck, he's talk, she has bakasi etc. To some, it's just a licence to flee from sin. However many are missing the real deal. The ultimate FEAR OF GOD. I dare to say that many can be xtian but with no fear of God. Joseph flee from his boss wife and his excuse was he could bring himself to sin against God. It takes the Grace of God to really have the fear of God. Our priorities as an individual differ from different individual. I heard a lady said, yea, he's a lovely guy, big hearted, loyal, presentable, will be a wonderful husband and father but she's very greedy and she wanted more. She wanted him to be a social guy so that he can fit into her profile. This is how many of us missed it by making insignificant to be our top priorities. It's only when yu have the fear of God that yu will be able to compromise, unselfish, tolerate, be gentle, understanding, lovable, contented and most importantly practice "for better for worse". No body teaches us anything about marriage, my dad or mom didn't teach me cos they were separated. Whatever lessons I had was from afar which didn't help.
      Pipu now treats marriage as carnivals, circus for aso ebi, a money making event, a jamboree etc. Marriages will continue to crumble if dia were no fear of God.
      dodo_36@live.com

      Delete
  2. Replies
    1. BLOG ANALYSER: I just thank God for where we are. I am truly grateful to God. I wish I knew that some times u can get angry nd wish that u have your space to think nd ease out your anger. I am truly grateful to God that we are waxing stronger and I pray For God's grace, blessings and favour upon our union.

      Delete
    2. I have a huge phobia now for marriage! I don't wano thread dat path again.Mothers shuddnt force dia kids to marry, let dem @dia own tym and pace!!!!!! Dis whole fin is a mess

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    3. I'm not married yet but I know it'll happen very soon. Marriage isn't easy at all.at least I've seen my parent's marriage as the first and most important example,then 2 of my siblings. Getting married to ur friend(best friend) is just the best. Because things change a lot once children start arriving and if u lack that friendship with ur partner, it becomes more difficult to withstand the trials that would come. God help all married couples and for those of us getting set to go into the institution, may He give us the best partners.

      evitaspeaks.blogspot.com

      Delete
  3. Make I dey use ona learn. *shines teeth*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol... Who yhu wan use learn? Go and marry o. No time

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    2. G idiot,I know you are stupid but do you always have to show it?

      Delete
    3. Gpharm once u are ready let me know

      Delete
  4. Replies
    1. U r so ryt stelz.i wish I knew also.esp d sharing 50-50 or even less of ur time, happiness and everything.
      I love where I am cos most of my mates havent achieved 10percent of what I have(marital wise).sometimes, some ppl wl even be asking me'whats your name'?. I smile and answer but soon enough, they wl realise they werent supposed to ask that qstn, thanks to marriage. Its always funny and interesting when that happens.

      Sometimes.i juat wish I have ME time.i m d type that like being alone but now, I cant help it, vistors today, inlaws that shiws up wtout prior notice, kids duty, wife duty, home duty. Whew!!!!! Too much for my age but I am coping

      Delete
    2. Oh Stfu! Age wise ke? Who sent u to get pregnant ? Arrangée, sharp sharp marriage. Is it an accolade? Mtcheeew.

      Delete
  5. I wish I knew getting married and having kids is a lot of work.
    The rate at which the kids depend on you for everything is heart breaking. It leaves a fear in the pit of my stomach.

    God help me to be able to fulfil my part in their lives successfully.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amen dear.
      I wish the same for myself.

      Delete
    2. Amen
      I even dey fear self.

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    3. Yes Dear. You will definitely fulfill ur part.
      I overheard my mother saying something similar to her mother, my grandma.
      It left me broken for years

      Delete
  6. arriage is interesting but for the strong minded.
    Be ready to compromise and deal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mrs fine face where have u been really missed your comments
      Hope the little one is fine?

      Delete
  7. May God help us to make the right decision.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Marriage is really for the strong hearted and courageous women,...sometimes husband makes u think of committing murder,they can be annoying over trivial matters,...imagine looking for a child for good 8yrs and now God has blessed you with pregnancy, ....hubby is complaining that pregnancy is making u not do this and that,huh?...even went as far as saying "is it not these pregnancy that 11yrs old children carry and give birth in the toilet that u won't let me sleep well,always moving around when u should be sleeping"...I felt like killing him last night for that comment....but the pains I was passing thru was excruciating.......am 37weeks and 2days gone and it's not funny at all dis period.....twalle for all mothers una dey try,...na this thing una dey go thru 4/5times?

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    2. @nnukwu nwanyi; don't mind them.

      Delete
    3. Lol, u don see am na. U go still go 3 more rounds, we de wait you for front. Soon you will carry your little one in your arms. Then you will know its worth the headache.

      Delete
  8. I wish I really knew how difficult it is to raise children. I would have enjoyed my honeymoon for at least 3 years before having children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lool! I thought I was the only one who ever thought about this. I want to enjoy for a year before I'll start popping the little ones out.its a lot of work.

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    2. Hahahhaha.....Abeg oooo, I am ttc, u guys are saying this, me I want the stress

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    3. Lol, Amen God will hear your prayers.

      Delete
  9. I wish I knew ,I would never have married a gigolo. Too late now I've turned out to be a bitter person like him .

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  10. I'm not married yet but will by God's grace but I wish someone had told me as a lil girl that chewing lots of chocolates, gums and all sorts without brushing before going to bed at night is harmful to my teeth.
    How I just hate sitting on a dentist chair with that big flash light on my face. Tooth ache na *winch*
    Thank God I'm better now. *phew* end of ranting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. BLOG ANALYSER: me2 tooth Ache! Chai! Ndoo.

      Delete
    2. @ Cynthia lyede sorry.
      Tooth ache can pain.
      Sorry dear

      Delete
    3. Pele. I've removed 4 already. But I still can't give up chocolates and ice chips.

      Delete
    4. Tooth ache is horrible, I wish too,now three teeth really bad,big holes, going to see the dentist

      Delete
  11. I'll just wait till i get married!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I wish someone had told me marriage comes with a whole lot of compromise.
    It's all good though...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh goodness! Tell me about it...too many compromises!

      Delete
    2. Choi
      Make una no make me fear marriage oh

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    3. Nothing to fear. Just about comprise .

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    4. Its the compromises that scare me the most sef. Amaka God won't give you more than you can handle, u hear. :)

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    5. Too many compromise. Hmm.......

      Delete
  13. a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said..
    .
    Nna marriage nobi childs play i swear.... #NowPlaying>> get low: tiwa savage
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

    ReplyDelete
  14. 100% on point Stella.. Marriage is not easy but it is sweet for those who are patient. My marriage is 4 years old but the first 2 years was HELL. I don't regret it because i'm now in heaven.
    One simple advise to single ladies! Make sure your husband to be loves you more than you love him.. God bless you all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Am happy for u..
      Tnx for d advise.
      Noted

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    2. men are also looking for ladies that will love them more than they love 'em. Bottom line: marry with your head not your heart!

      Delete
  15. I wish I was told that my EX is a big fool. I wish I was told someone will poison my dad, would av tried stopping it even if it's thru Ifa. I wish I was told that life ain't easy, would av just stay back as an egg and come out as blood(lol). I wish I had not rejected the course I was offered then, would av been a graduate now and help in the house. I wish so many things jare

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is neva too late,u cn still do. Something, learn a skill, n do pt...or do small small work,u cn still. help in d house...it's nt too late

      Delete
    2. Honestly I have accepted my position and I refuse to wish. I married a good man. He loves me so much. He can cook,clean wash etc. But don't love him. We hv had sex 15times in 5yrs. We hv two kids. I can't stand him touching me. We don't share the same bed. I knw he is hurting. He avoids me at home. Spends more time with our kids. What can I say? I am so lonely esp at night..i long..yearn for real intimacy. All I need is one night to be unfaithful. That touch.. That kiss.. Deep moaning and sighs.. Just to release the tension I carry around with a fake smile. He just don't know what to do with a naked woman. At least am grateful that he loves me. Self control mode activated.. Lol

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    3. @I AM; you can teach him what to do with a naked woman. Or you can divorce him and free him. There's a lady out there that ll bring out the man in him so stop being wicked and free the guy .

      Delete
  16. Aunty Stella I concur with your submission, sincerely I love my husband and my baby. Am still just about a year in marriage but marriage is more than what you see on your wedding day and courtship, in marriage you have to deal wisely with in law issues for me that's being my major problem because you end up forcing him to take a stand but the truth is I will marry my husband over and over again. I just learnt to deal fairly and wisely, sometimes am just fed up and want to go away but right now after series of quarrel I have gotten my bearing, I have learnt to choose my battle pls let me remember Co wife palava. In all if it was just my husband and I alone I will have said marriage is a walk in the park. Flames

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wish someone actually told me about Nigerian society concerning single hood. Everyone keep asking stupid question. And I smile or just ignore them. My last relationship breakup made me bitter. If only took a male friend at church to make me forget about how much of a failure I an. I was so angry with myself. I am not a failure anyway. Sometimes I feel I am not ready to get married. Aswear. Somet@es I have the fear that I wouldn't be able to perform my duties well as a wife and mother. I am scared of the sacrifice and compromise. I have failed in businesses and relationships. I don't want to fail in marriage. I am 25yrs old. I wish society do not give women a time limit for marriage. 29 to 30 years, that's when I think I will be ready for marriage. I love kids like mad. I wish I wasn't a Nigerian I will just go to one of those fertility places and look for a sperm donor. And get myself pregnant. Have my beautiful princess. I could imagine her eyes. And the dresses I will wear her. I love to have a girl. But marriage, Hmmm!

      Delete
    2. Honey,don't let society or anyone force you into marriage before you are ready for it, wasn't ready in my twenties. And didn't lie to myself ,got married at 32 to a fantastic guy and we are having a blast now, don't go into marriage until you are emotionally and mentally ready,trust me it is worth the wait, and just hang in there , wat u think is failure is God building character and strength in you,it will all pass and you will use your story to encourage someone soon

      Delete
  17. Am single n ready t mingle. Lord help me to plunge well wen d time comes. *comment reading mode activated*

    ReplyDelete
  18. @ Scofferscrib Mo' have said it all but your last paragraph is very funny lol! madam take it easy oky all will be well!

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  19. I ll just come back to read and learn as I never marry

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  20. Waiting for comments.. Hehehe

    ckjacob.blogspot.com

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  21. Here to learn so I can be better prepared.

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  22. Hmm. Still single. Not married yet. Still learning and I hope to learn more. So help me God.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hmmmmm, I'll read and learn....

    I've made mistakes in life and learned from them, I'll make more and learn more and keep getting better

    But in the end, I'm happy I learned the way I did....it made me so wise and alert...

    I love life...I love love...I love God.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Nice initiative, Stellz.


    Make I learn from unu married ones today.


    #WhiteDiamondOut

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Where is ermiesha tibs' blog. Tibs tell tales blog. Have she stopped blogging? What happened?

      Delete
  25. I wish I knew men would do and say anything to make a woman their wife, but after that, he feels like he's done her a Favor and can act any how he likes. She's not going anywhere anyway. Men ehn. God help you guys. Very double standard people like this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The story of ALLLL our lives o. D taking for granted just get degree. Some high, some low. But its everywhere in this country.

      Delete
  26. I wish I knew it's impossible to meet bank's target as marketers. Gosh! Am almost hypertensive

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol...sorry. I can totally relate.

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    2. Aunty gwegzzz, your picture cracked me the hell up....Hahahaha

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    3. Aunty gwegzzzzzzz....dis your Dp n Die!!!

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    4. Aunty gwegzzzzzzz....dis your Dp n Die!!!

      Delete
  27. i almost ventured into marrying a man have known for years wvout seeing the strange parts of him, wc he recently exhibited. I am still in shock. This post will help a lot of people who are ripe for marriage to look carefully before leaping.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How I wish u could share this experience to help those ripe for marriage as you said

      Delete
  28. I wish I knew before getting married that I would be a widow coping with being both a mother and father alone to my kids. It feels like I'm still stuck in the year I lost my husband. Each day gets scary with hoping I can provide financially, emotionally and psychologically for my kids. Two people's responsibility has become one person's responsibility. Despite all that has happened, LORD I'M GRATEFUL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hugs.....
      My mum was widowed just when it was very tough.... My dear,it was tough.... I don't want to be in your shoes cz I saw it all......but hey, my siblings are almost graduates, I'm a mum with kids, a super lioness and almost Tru with my MSc....
      You can do it!!'!!!

      Delete
    2. Swty I wish I could give u a hug! Its well with u

      Delete
  29. I wish I knew having much kids is so stressful,taking all my time.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Am not married and am scared of marriage . I can't imagine my freedom being taken away from me. I can't imagine looking at one mans face for the rest of my life. Am enjoying this spinsterhood. Am so loving it am not in a hurry to get the Mrs title attached to my name. The most scary part is leaving my brothers and sisters behind and spending Christmas with another family. God help me.......

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amaka, I replied you in ihn... Your boo proposal brouhaha.... Hugs
      God bless and lead you.

      Delete
    2. Amax,mbanù,those things you mentioned ain't problems. When you marry,you will not even want to be away from your guy.
      When I married,any time my hubby dey go work,I'll stand at the window n watch till he crosses the gate. His coz always said I didn't use to laugh till oga comes back. That is love,pure one. You don't want him away from you bt he gotta go to work. If he was travelling I'll follow him n as they'd be leaving ,I'll start crying. He tells our kids these stories n we laff over it. Marriage is fun but sometimes you wish you were at home with ur siblings.We quarrel(nobody witnesses ours),we bone for ourselves but a lil word melts the ice.
      Let me not talk about the coital jamboree but let me summarise it thus:Imagine yourself back from somewhere,feeling hot,you move to the fridge n what do you get,your fave icecream,cool n tasty n extremely sweet.

      So,go ye forth and marry

      Delete
  31. I wish I knew...Nevertheless it's a journey worthwhile.

    ReplyDelete
  32. *sideeyes* I wish I had married early, coz being single till now has created some embarrassing confusion. #Runsaway

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh dear!! Lol. Its never too late.Love is timeless.

      Delete
  33. I wish someone had told me that getting pregnant would be dependent on how hard you pray and fast, how often you use fertility enhancement drugs, how your husband keeps counting dates and giving you deadlines to give him a child. I wish someone had told me that once you get married, you need to rely on drugs and herbs to get pregnant. I am just tired but I will not give up. Oh God! please give me a baby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He has answered your prayer. Do you believe this?

      Delete
    2. It is well. Ur prayers will b answered sooner than you think

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    3. He will visit you soon Anon16:31

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    4. It is well with you dear. Continue to trust in the Lord knowing that his ways are not ours and he would grant you ure heart desires in due time.Don't give just yet..May God strengthen you always IJN Amen.

      Delete
    5. My dear .... I see we ar on d same canoe ...May God answer our prayers.....i hate drugz / injections...wtf

      Delete
    6. BLOG ANALYSER: Amen, Be strong, relax nd He is God of surprises.

      Delete
    7. May bring joy and happiness to ur home dear. My God has not failed b4 and he will not fail u dear.

      Delete
  34. I wish I knew being a good girl doesn't really pay and now it's taking a negative toll on me as guys end up breaking my heart and take me for granted.
    I wish I don't have to marry... but d pressure from fam...Dear lord! I just wana be happy. Am tired of heartbreaks,lies,deceit etc wen all u gv is honesty, loyalty and goodness.
    Iya Ti jemi gan sha....
    Sobs
    Almost 29 and still nt getting to reap d good hv sown in time past. I tink am cursed. I must be cursed. Love don't just love me.

    Bad girls stays winning... Ahhhhhh LIFE!!!

    Wails!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Trust me it pays don't give up, cos in the end you will win. Hang on!

      Delete
    2. D only costant thng in life is change, if u need to re evaluate ur actions and decisions, pls feel free to do so.

      Delete
    3. Bad girls stay winning NI BO?

      The Psalmist said " I envied the richness of the wicked............... till I saw their end.
      To every seed sown, there is a fruit. Being a good girl might not have gotten you a husband yet but it certainly has gotten you some benefits. If only you would count your blessings.....you'd realize the husband part is "jara".
      Yours will come shortly.

      Delete
    4. Awwwww!! Don't allow such negative thoughts over shadow ure judgement dear. There's a reward that awaits you. Its jus a matter of time.Love will find you in due time.

      Delete
    5. My dear it pays ooo. I have faith. The problem is that I am not out going. And I can't give my kini to anyhow guy. And Al the bad girls be marrying everyday. Those ones that have 59 body count. Ahhh!

      Delete
    6. @ freshdew...am nt anon 16:34, but I kinda agree with her. Sometimes good girl doesn't pay o! Am still in the SCHOOL of waiting! Don't even know wen I will graduate, don't even know d course am reading sef....#just hd to rant#

      Delete
  35. Kids...got 2. Child raising and juggling ur duties as mom nd wife is the most difficult part

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  36. Polygamous setting no be am.

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  37. I wish I've listened to relationship/engagement rule last 2years

    ReplyDelete
  38. i wish i knew too..........but having that cute mini me gives me the strength to face my marital issues because i remember that he is watching and that alone keeps me strong.marriage is possible when u can forgive lik a million times..when u dont look for deep spiritual revelations where common sense is required.and ur marital life private,except for abusive relationship sha.....IMO n experience......BTW it is not easy...at all..smetimes i wish m still single

    ReplyDelete
  39. I wish I was patient a bit, I wish I saw what every other people saw, I wish I didn't Mar my good records for nothing ,I wish I didn't trade a gold for fluke. I can go on and on,I wish,i wish, I wish !!! *crying* God help me regain my wasted time and grant me my heart desires.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Wish someone had told me that being a wife, mum and career woman is no mean feat and takes a lot of patience which I struggle with...
    Wish someone had told me that everything I did (even with my own money) and everywhere I went had to have Mr man in the know. In the early days of marriage, I would plan holidays, do things without his take on the matter. *Women who become too independent prior to marriage*
    Wish someone had told me that even if I'm not hungry or in the mood, others are hungry and in the mood *bedroom and kitchen things*

    Marriage! The one lesson I am still learning.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I wish you I knew I would go through 4miscarriages maybe I would have taken my time to check what's up with my health and that I wouldn't have kids till now, am surprised but am not defeated.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hang in there, dear. Help is on it's way. I'm glad you are not defeated. Remain strong dear. Praying for you.

      Delete
    2. BLOG ANALYSER: I adnire your last word. You are not defeated! God almighty will bless you this year in Jesus name Amen. Just be believe and be strong.

      Delete
    3. It cn b retify in general hospital,dere is a wy dey cn tie it if ur health cnt carry it,seek medical advice asap.i wish u luck,i wish myself too,cuz am blivin in God 4 hubby n children

      Delete
  42. Marriage is all about patience.u hv to be respectful.thats a stage of life for matured minded pple

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  43. I wish i knew love isn't enough to keep the marriage going...... Money is an essential!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you...
      That's the worst thing that can happen to any marriage...

      Delete
  44. I wish I knew how much dependence on me my son will have. I have just one, I'll be poping another one soon, it's so scary thinking of two of them. It can be emotionally draining really. I love my son and his coming sibling so much, I just wish I understood beforehand.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It will take a while but you will adjust, trust me. I have 3 now and with each I had to adjust. Enjoy your kids before they grow up and leave home and you start missing them. Have a safe delivery, darling!

      Delete
  45. I wish i knew i will miss my spinsterhood i would have delayed just a little bit longer! Marriage is a hard knock life.........

    i wish someone had told me how much money is soo important in marriage i would have opted for a richer and more financially stable man!!!!!!! God please help your daughter as i am working my ass out to make ends meet

    ReplyDelete
  46. i wish i know about gay things very well and how they react before getting married to one but I thank baba God for saving my life from a monster!
    it well sha marriage comes with alot of packages that only God can save u from the mess!

    ReplyDelete
  47. I wish I knew what I know now, I would have kept my virginity till I was a lot older and enjoy my first time, instead of that hide and seek disvergin thing @ 19 wey no get head! Smtewww

    ReplyDelete
  48. I wish I didn't get married at the age of 19
    I wish I had an active dating life b4 marriage.
    I wish i knew whtz it's like to be in love.. I never got the chance to.
    I wish rain shld stop falling in Phc, bcz my roof is leaking badly.
    I wish DH could have extra means of livelihood to reduced our financial issh.
    I wish and pray to stay strong to resist sexual temptations. I wish I could earn more than 30k, to enable me take the boys out for some good time. I just NOTICED my last son staring at me,and I realize that God has the best plan for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. May God visit you at the point of your need IJN.

      Delete
  49. I wish I was told this or that, in the end I smile and thank God 4 sleepless nights with the kids, cooking till I must drop, cleaning bla bla bal.. Finally the juice is worth the squeeze. Am Grateful much

    ReplyDelete
  50. I wish I knew getting disvirgined on my wedding night was not an easy peasy task. I wish I knew how much having kids will change my entire life. I wish I knew marriage is not what we see in the movies that end with "and they lived happily". It's often more like: and they struggled to adapt to each other, hurt each other, forgave each other, hurt each other some more, smiled then cried, smiled again, fought each other, fought for each other, fought to live happily ever after... I wish I knew!

    ReplyDelete
  51. Please check out my wedding night story below to understand my "I wish I knew" better...

    Getting Disvirgined Can Be Hard

    ReplyDelete
  52. I've been married for a few months, single girls please read this!

    I wish someone had told me that it's not enough to marry a guy that loves you so much, you have to love him a little too. For me the love did not grow and there is nothing I dread more than my husband touching me. No love, no attraction, no chemistry, no intimacy, it's been so frustrating. I am now counting down for at least a year to pass so that I can seek a divorce and enjoy the rest of my life.

    I wish someone had told me that waiting till marriage night for sex is rubbish, especially if you are not a virgin. You will only graduate to adultery when your need are not met.

    Please take the time to wait for someone that you love and loves you too. You are worth it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chai!!!
      He loves me mad,but I dnt feel nadan for him,he tries to be romantic,I get irritated!!!

      Getting married to him goan break me..taking a walk now that am still opportuned!!!

      Thanks Stella for this post!!!

      Delete
    2. Endure if he is rich but if he is a church rat,abeg waka!...

      Delete
    3. Omg! Thank you so much for this! I've been torn between marrying someone who loves me so much but whom I have no feelings for. I am more determined to wait for the one with whom I can share a mutual love.

      Thank you

      Delete
    4. Ha I almost married somebody without sex cos he was a Pst in calling. Only to see d size of his very thin Dick. Tufia.

      Delete
    5. This one pass me o!
      I too married my husband without loving him but he did love me to a fault. Had to go on with the marriage plans koz I didn't have a good reason to back out. No one would have listened to me. BUT after our wedding night and all the intimacy that followed, the love began to grow and now it's even choking me. Lol
      Dunno why you still feel nothing for yours though. Maybe you just haven't tried hard enough

      Delete
  53. I wish someone told me that hot Abacha with chilled Pepsi everyday will add a dress size to my frame.

    ReplyDelete
  54. I wish I saw through this man I married now. The past one and half years has been very traumatic, his mindset is in 1940s, he wears procrastination like camisole, very obstinate, never takes advice, anti social does not have any friend, can be in doors for 7 days if govt declares it as public holiday. Very malicious, unromantic, low libido I can go on and on. I regret ever getting married to him. I miss my days as a spinster. God why did you give me this type of daft human being as a husband. He irritates me. Phew

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear who no go no No wetin dey. But u made me smile sha.

      Delete
    2. Didn't you date him even for a little while?? Ha.. ur wahala plenty.. It is well.

      Delete
    3. Are there any good things about this man that you see. What was that thing about him that attracted you to him? You can choose to see all the bad things about or to focus on the positive ones. At least I didn't see you mention that he is a cheat or wife beater. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Water your garden and tend it. Find reasons to stay married. Dwell on the positive and not the negative. God bless you, my dear.

      Delete
    4. Wears procrastination like a camisole?Lol

      Delete
    5. BLOG ANALYSER: it is well dear. Please above all just see if u can see something good about him to love.

      Delete
    6. Lol @daft human being. Ndi misisi... pele Sha. God will comfort you.

      Delete
    7. @SDK Prayer Lady....hehehe. Am laughing so hard am now crying "wear procastination like camisole" daz epic....heheheheh am nt laughing @ you o! Just your choice of words. Gudnit

      Delete
    8. OMG! I actually looled so loud my son asked what the matter was.
      This your description na die

      Delete
  55. Greedy women,when the going is good,u call ur man sweet names and say life is good.But when things nose dive women feel depressed,insecured and terrified.where is ur faith? Question-show me that situation that last forever. When Buhari lost election for the third time,he wept bitterly like a baby.Today he is nigeria's president.on relationships-pls don't confuse good straff for love pls.The man who makes u come that makes u feel like a woman does not necessarily Ok him as the right man.Solution- look for d one who has the same mental pix as u devoid of deceit.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I wish someone had told me that sex does not make a man to do what you want all the time.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Marriage is a work in progress. Like I always tell my single friends, make sure it is your decision to marry whom you want to and not fall under pressure. It makes the murky waters endurable knowing it is your choice.

    ReplyDelete
  58. SDK prayer lady has killed me with laugh here!!!!!!!loooooooooooool

    ReplyDelete
  59. I wish someone told me to be financially stable or at least get a gud job before marriage. It's been 13 years and I feel like my whole life has been wasted. Marriage killed all my dreams nd potentials. I cnt even give my only child for now ( TTC) the little things she needs. At 37, no savings, no assets, no nothing. All thanks to marriage.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Thank you Aunty Stella for this post.

    ReplyDelete
  61. i wish someone told me lanre banjo would break my heart

    ReplyDelete
  62. Sigh ........Story for another day

    ReplyDelete
  63. Sincerely,true words,I wish I knew somethings earlier in my life. Well its not too late for me.
    Nice words

    ReplyDelete
  64. I wish I knew that my hubby talks too much ,I wish I knew he was a mummy boy who will always run to discuss me with her,I wish i knew he is temperamental,I wish I knew dt marriage and having kids is a day job of its own,I wish I knew men can change,I wish I knew d type of woman my MIL is I wouldn't have married his son,I have a shop but no money to stock it ì wish someone can make me a distributor.

    ReplyDelete
  65. NA wah oh. Lord. Pls give me somebody as nice and understanding aas I am!! Very playful with a good heart. Lord I can't make a marital mistake oh!!! Inshort lord I want to get married dis year. My village pple shld better not try me !!

    ReplyDelete
  66. NA wah oh. Lord. Pls give me somebody as nice and understanding aas I am!! Very playful with a good heart. Lord I can't make a marital mistake oh!!! Inshort lord I want to get married dis year. My village pple shld better not try me !!

    ReplyDelete
  67. I wish someone told me my daughter will not latch...Always expressing breastmilk for her..its very tiring...Pumping breast milk day and night

    ReplyDelete
  68. I wish I didn't marry d bastard of a husband I hv. I regret this marriage. The only good thing that came out of it was my girl.after that nothing. He's a prostitute follower. Anything in skirt. Wot a fool.such a fool

    ReplyDelete
  69. I wish I knew I wouldn't end up marrying my ex I wouldn't have dated him. The hurt and betrayal I feel now knowing he is getting married soon isn't what I should be going through . How I wish I didn't remain friends with him after we broke up... I know in future I'll look back and thank him for dumping me:) because I'll have the best.

    ReplyDelete
  70. I so so wish I can get a job to be able to assist hubby,the beating is becoming too much since am not able to assist with anything.being at home can be frustrating especially when you are used to making your own money.God I need a job badly

    ReplyDelete
  71. I wish i never ever married a port harcourt runs girl. I was severely warned not to marry her but i didn't mind about her past and saw the signs too but i guess her deceit,packaging and the sex was out of this planet. Her suggar daddies won't leave her punani alone for me. She's now crying and begging that she will kill herself if i should end the marriage after i found out again her secret cunny affairs last week. Thank God no kids yet and marriage is still fresh.I have a family meeting this weekend and her cheap ass runs girl bride price would be returned Sharp Sharp.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Challey...eyen easy oooooo....chooooo...I feel you mehn..the Lord is your strength

      Delete
  72. Please continue this thread

    ReplyDelete
  73. I wish I had known that having unprotected sex while in school will give one HIV,an any good man that wants to marry you and hears about it, runs but God has been faithful, I am a champion #peace#

    ReplyDelete
  74. I wish I can beat up my husband when he starts arguing about the most dumbest thing,
    Does he think am dumb or what
    Why can't he reason before he acts
    He feels everyone likes his personality and would never take corrections

    ReplyDelete
  75. I wish I knew that wld be your last night mum,i wld have taken you to church, even when you got back from church, I wld have spent the whole night with you, but I went to sleep, only for you to die in your sleep
    I wish I knew that will be your last day dad,i wld have asked you not to go to work..I woke up 5am and ran to your room to have a heart to heart discussion with you, you promised to do a lot for me, only for me to hear later on that you were shot and you died.
    I wish I knew, I wldnt have invested all my cash in that bizness, all my savings went into the mud
    I can go on and on and on and on...life has taught me alot..by the grace of God will pick up myself from this pit...but I'm most grateful that in all these my faith has not wavered in my Lord Jesus...i've refused to do things that are not in line with the word of God...my SET time will soon come...I'm jst in The waiting season.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. May God comfort you Bro
      Remember God is with you
      Bye strong
      Don't lose hope

      Delete
  76. I wish I knew soooo many thing before marriage, it would have made life a little easier.....9 years into it, will still thanking God.............

    ReplyDelete
  77. As am entering this institution next year, father flog out this my stubbornness, this i pray.

    ReplyDelete
  78. I never knew after getting married I will still Love licking pussies. I still fantasize about my ex gf. My husband does it well but I need a pussy. Do I need to be delivered I need to talk to someone

    ReplyDelete
  79. Marriage....an institution you never graduate from.
    It can only get better....

    ReplyDelete

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