Dear Stella/blog visitors,
let me cut the long story short,i got married sometime early this year and God has blessed my husband and i as we are expecting twins,good news but sad me because i recently found out that my husband caught my mum cheating and she has begged him not to tell (her children and my loving father),i got to find out some how,and my husband began to abuse me,hit me then latter it turned to calling me names
like ashawo,' don't want your mum to come and do any nonsense omugwo because i don't want her adulterous hands on my kids',he will make statements like have your kids and get out of my life you would be like your mum in future he would call me bitch,he comes home like at about 2am almost every other nite girls call him he even buys gifts for girls and not me,he restricts me from going out because he says my mum is a socialite that is why she could cheat on my dad,he hates it if i talk on phone with my brothers,mum and even stylishly insults my dad whom i hold in high esteem,.
I do not want to discuss this my mums affair with my brothers and my mum because i am 25 and dis are my first kids i would have loved to hold a meeting after my kids are born,in fact Stella many more things which i have not stated in this mail which he does to me please Stella i need help and advice please thanks and GOD BLESS
*I am honestly lost for what to add....i am flabbergasted and dumbfounded.Please blog visitors advise this sweetheart.
Sorry but I think ur hubby is just using whatever it is he found out about ur mum to frustrate u.dats if it's even true!if not how e take consign am'?
ReplyDeleteNyway u should look for how to move ur arguments from 'ur mum issue' and blackmail him back.cos he's just manipulating u my dear.
#open ur eyes#
U must be single,stop wondering why,cos it's obvious.
DeleteSo far I'm sure blackmailing guys into marrying u hasn't worked yet,goodluck
#Freak.
Ares or watever,i am single of course,but in ur little mind!*
DeleteIt's not my fault I understand the game,and I am beginning to see u are the blackmailing husband,
Pls stop tormenting ur wife. Oga!!God will judge u!*rolls eyes and walks away*
Please, take dont leave your kids with this man, seems like he wants to tk them away from you when you give birth. Tell your brothers! You should not be suffering like this na.
DeleteI think you should talk to someone confidentially, maybe ur brothers but not ur dad....let them know ur hubby is blackmailing u emotionally and psychologically because of what ur mum did...moreso, this is not good for u in ur present condition.
ReplyDeleteFinally I think ur hubby is an ass-hole
How could ru husband have caught ur mum in that situation? Was it redhanded(this one is almost impossible) or he saw her in an compromising situation with a male?
DeleteI think your husband is lying, he might have made passes at ur mum and she fell for it or vice versa,and he's disgusted now,I'm very sure he warned u not to ever ask ur mum what he said, that way u can never know the truth, I advise u secretely open up to ur mum and bare everything and also tell her how bad things have turned since your husband told u, that way u will hear your mom's side of the story, ur husbands story doesn't add up, he sounds like someone that has always wanted to cheat on u, "he buys girls gift with getting for u"Some Men are wicked! And our Society allows them get away with their wickedness, the same cheating he's hating ur mother for, beating u over, that what he's blatantly displaying to ur face! if it wasn't for ur pregnancy I would have advised u to give ur marriage a brak,u are just 25..and these things he's putting u through are not healthy for ur present condition and ur emotional and psychological well being.
Contactur Mum fast!she would know how to handle the situation better even if its true unless she doesn't love u and want ur happiness. Don't think to much dear.
I don't c y her husband sud treat her that way. Does he see tendensies in her to be like her mom? Also, he probably wanted2cheat on her all this while, and now, he has seen a 'good' reason to justify his act. Its well with u
ReplyDeleteIt is not always like mother and daughter, try and talk to him and make him understand that u are not like that and commit everything to God in prayers asking him to intervain cos u really need God sincerely to change ur husband perception
ReplyDeleteOh ϑε̲ãr, I'm short of words. I guess what he saw irritated him badly. U know that feeling when u hold someone in high esteem and they fuck up, u feel irritated and disappointed but he should control his emotions and know that u and υ̲̣̥r̲̅ mom r 2 separate beings. Well, maybe u should try having a one on one conversation with him. And u bring in υ̲̣̥r̲̅ family, tell them what's on ground, that way he will know u don't condone such acts. Talk to υ̲̣̥r̲̅ mom and make her know what she's putting u true. Well I'm sorry ϑε̲ãr. I feel so bad for u. And υ̲̣̥r̲̅ husband is bn immature. No offence!
ReplyDeleteThings fall apart and the centre can no longer hold. Very tight situation, it's sad to say but there seems to be very little hope for the survival of the marriage largely because of your husband's thought pattern. Well, like they say, there's nothing God cannot do,prevail on your husband and pray to God.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck.
I feel so sad 4 u ♍γ̲̣̣̥ dear, so sad. Honestly ur mother didn't do well @ all. She has almost destroyed ur marriage, but it can still be remedied. Just start praying about it, God will definitly touch and change ur hubby. If u havea spiritual mother that u can trust and talk to, ask her to join u in praying and fasting. There's power in a praying woman. God bless.
ReplyDeleteSo she shld go on fasting in her condition?
DeleteWrong advice.
no mind d mumu nnena, pregnant woman Expecting twins should be fasting shey? Msheeeeeew
DeleteDear Poster,
Am sorry but this is way past what u can keep and handle by yourself o.. Those he have anybody he respects? Please go see them and tell them what is going on, let them try talking some senses to him. Preferably his family.... I hope he has reasonable people in his family sha.... Just try them...He is totally behaving like a kid,its quiet irritating....
Very wrong indeed!!! I guess d twins will feed from ur own stomach
DeleteNne,you don pursue julit from this blog abi? E no good o....
DeleteYou must try to make peace between them by inviting a third party; preferably your husband's friends. His best buddy would do just fine. Because this one that he has barred your mum from coming for Omugwo and subsequent visits....fowl yansh must open one day with that hide-and-seek life. Peace moves must be initiated now. Call his best buddy to help.
ReplyDeleteBTW, this aspect of him insulting you and beating you....that one I no understand am o. Domestic Violence is of the devil. Try and initiate peace moves with his friends first, then see what happens from there. Most Importantly: PRAY. It changes everything. God Bless.
Tell him you are you & you aren't your Mum. Now you know make sure you stay on the straight and narrow.
ReplyDeleteUr husband is mean,don't want to be too forward but d truth is he never luved u,am sure he married u for a reason.I have seen women dat are big tym and well known runs women and dia dota's are happily married.Him catching ur mom is not an excuse to beat u up(how can he even touch u knowing u re preggy),abuse u,demoralise u,insults ur peeps,and cheat on u.I mean he didn't catch u cheating why pour d blame on u and bcome mean about it?I aint gonna advice u,u have to decide on what to do...sending u hugsss.
ReplyDeleteOn point!
DeleteA man that hits his wife is a big monster.. But a man hitting his pregnant wife is the devil himself.. And that discovery about ur mother has given him the perfect excuse to cheat on u and still make u feel like its ur fault.... U need to leave that house first before anything can be done... No matter the reason, a man shld never ever hit a woman let alone a pregnant woman... That's just pure insanity.. Smh
ReplyDeleteSweetie your husband is an Ass! Sorry!
ReplyDeleteSecondly, one day one day your dad is gonna find out your mom cheated/cheats and he's gonna find out u knew about it and he's gonna hate u for not talking. I'm married too! And my mom misbehaves sometimes(not cheating) but i don't waste time in baring my mind right there and then. We quarrel and make up but that doesn't stop me from rubbing d truth on her face whenever. So ma point is, open up to your family what's happening starting with your mom. Cuz i told my own mom that before she spoils/ruin my home i will disown her. And sweetie its been working for me. She put u in this mess so give her her own share. And like i said earlier your husband is an Ass. Don't tink he got love for u boo!
Anon 10.32PM
DeleteThat's not true. Her mother's infidelity is none of her business. She can advice her mum but she has no business spilling the beans to her dad.
And no, no real man will hate his daughter for not telling him cheating allegations about her mum. Was the daughter there when the cheating parties were having sex.
You sound like a very rude and disrespectful child to your mum. Check it before you wreck yourself.
Abi?!
DeleteLady. Ur husbend iss a wortttttt? Eh goat! Mmmeehhhh, Ewu. U jest dunt mind him pray ya own n mek u aresef ampi. God wee toushh is art.
DeleteDen u are moda parraps u wee aff to spake to ah. Say "maami see wat u are hackshuns aff cos in ma laive, is deez goud". Henway I wee prayin for u n save deliffree. Peezaut
my dear, ur marriage is too early for dat n dats nt enough reason for ur husband to live such life n insult u on top,n he has startd carryin women before he saw ur mum n if u ask ur mum ,she caught him wit a lady too. Jst be prayerful n if he hits u again u leave his hou. His a stupid man
ReplyDeleteOwu t'iya gbon l'omo o ran! The yarn spawned (thread woven) by a mother will be used by the daughter to make a cloth!
ReplyDeletei want to share a testimony of my life to every one. i was married to my husband george morgan, i love him so much we have been married for 5 years now with two kids. when he went for a vacation to france he meant a lady called clara, he told me that he is no longer interested in the marriage any more. i was so confuse and seeking for help, i don't know what to do until I met my friend miss florida and told her about my problem. she told me not to worry about it that she had a similar problem before and introduce me to a man called dromoba who cast a spell on her ex and bring him back to her after 3days. Miss florida ask me to contact dromoba. I contacted him to help me bring back my husband and he ask me not to worry about it that the gods of his fore-fathers will fight for me. He told me by three days he will re-unite me and my husband together. After three day my husband called and told me he is coming back to sought out things with me, I was surprise when I saw him and he started crying for forgiveness. Right now I am the happiest woman on earth for what this great spell caster did for me and my husband, you can contact dromoba on any problem in this world, he is very nice, here is his contact dromobaspellhome@gmail.com, He is the best spell caster. call him on +2348076826545.
ReplyDeleteOloriburuku somebody
DeleteMadam spell caster..Lmaoooooooo...I like ur ways sha..u no send..
DeleteBuhahaha afi spell caster nah... Rubbish, quit trying to scam people..
DeleteLmao,blogs re now a medium to advertise native doctors and pimps,smh.
DeletePls will d spell work on Dangote or Don jazzy?
DeleteWill it work 4 me 2 collect money from federal reserve?
DeleteLmaooo.. The amusing thing is that a lot of people are actually going to call this clown. With the sort of mentality some women have, yet they still wonder why their husbands left in the first place.!!
DeleteНaнaɑº°˚=Dнaнaɑº°=D=D
Hmnnnn....speechless! Am dissapointed at your mum though....but I think your husband is blowing the whole thing out of proportion by attributing your mum's wayward attitude towards you....he is just using it as an excuse to justify his own wayward lifestyle.
ReplyDeleteU have to talk to someone he respects, not just a friend of his o.. (Make them no take d matter laugh over a bottle of beer.) Invite someone he respects so much (unfortunately this is going to cause another ear to hear of your mum's shameless escapade but we are fighting for your own home!) If after the talk, he doesn't change, then e own de im body. you deserve better!
BlogLord .... How come u did not comment on the wife cheating thing? I noticed wide-eyed and Eze wanyi too....Just wondering aloud anyway... No mind me...hope u r gd though.
DeleteShe's a cheating whore that's why,with the way she comments and rotates on diff blogs you can tell...blogwhore for real! Lwkmd!
DeleteHian!
DeleteSee monitoring of SDKB celebs!
Anon 1.09PM, you dey try o
In this case, I think two wrongs can make a right. Tell him, he is not the owner of the pregnancy u are carrying. Let him go and commit sucide or think of how to make peace.
ReplyDeleteTony Ihekire, your stupidity knows no bounds
DeleteSo he would kill her abi,this one he is already beating her tho the kids are his.
DeleteMy sis call ur mother privately and ask her, tell her what her action is causing in ur marriage and for ur man, cheating dey his vein no be small, stand up and defend urself when ur husband brings up d matter again and he will stop dat is nonsense. God bless u
ReplyDeleteYou shud bare it all out to your mum. She needs to know how her actions has affected. Let that be on her conscience. If she loves you and wants to see you happy, she wud change. For your husband, he has absolutely no right to hit or disrespect you. He is taking out the anger he feels towards your mum for what she did on you and yet he is doing the very same thing. Two wrongs cannot make a right. Get an elderly person he respects to speak some sense in to him.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteYour husband is a fool. He never loved you. He's using your mum's alledged indiscretion as an excuse to torment you.
Save your father from the pain and talk to your mum and siblings first. They need to get you out of that house before he kills your and your babies. Who knows if your mum didn't do it?
I wonder what's going on with women these days? Why are you all so distrusting of your mothers or mother figures? Almost all the stories brought here could easily be sorted if an experienced older woman was brought it.
ReplyDeleteSince your mother is the accused. I'd have expected her to be the first person you tell about your husband's bullshit. Even if your mother is a Jezebel, she will always love you. Talk to her
Divorce him because he has just started... You'll see more wicked acts from him after child birth.
ReplyDelete*PUFFS SMOKE*
Let your mother know that you are aware of her secret.
ReplyDeleteLet her know about the pain and trauma your husband is putting you through because of her.
Let her know that her actions evoked a bad reaction in your life.
As for your husband, he is very abusive. Abusive in all ramifications. Seek counseling in church or with trusted family elders/members.
Congratulations for your twins and I wish you all the best.
Dis is not ur husband young lady..u married a wrong person.sorry
ReplyDeleteBeat ur husband at his game ,don't show any emotions,don't call anybody for any peace talk,carry on as if all is well.
ReplyDeleteIndifference is d name of d game,am sure ur husband is a poor man cos that's how they behave.
My daughter(18)final year student,is getting married in dec,and me ezewanyi dey cut show wella,wetin concen my pikin hubby for inside?anyway d guy know say I no dey alright upstairs.
I remembered d day my hubby called me a poor man's daughter,I gave him this chilling look,laughed at him and then hit my ass and walked away,not to feel sorry for myself(godforbid),I called up this island *aunty* whom my hubby detest cos he fears d *aunty* will *corrupt* ezewanyi;ewooo make una no vex ooo,wetin concern this tory with d post.hian!
Eh so if his father is a womaniser, you should also start treating him like dirt. Your husband should park somewhere jo. All these low esteem having boys that flaunt themselves as men. It didn't have to take your Mum cheating, it could have been anything else. If he hits you again, pour him hot soup. All this nonsense, and you are having kids. Are you employed? You better talk to your family, your Mum and Dad can and will work out their issues. You need a safe place before this man kills you. He says have the children and leave his life, and he is expecting you to drop the babies with him ba?
ReplyDeleteYou better get yourself to safety, you can be interceding from there but get yourself to a safe place. If he wants to be a judgmental idiot...he can go ahead. The same person that is cheating is lashing out at your mum, see me see wahala o. The guts ma sef. You let someone insult your parents?? Is he perfect? Stella, I don too vex for women abeg.
Please excuse me o, wetin concern the man ma sef. See how he has swallowed panadol for what does not even concern him. Abi was he messing with you mum and is angry that your mum has shifted attention elsewhere? See me see some men o. If he had sense, wouldn't it be to try and do something about it instead of giving you hell. You have no business with this. Madam, please be wise and get yourself to safety. Priority 1 now, your children...after they are safely here, then you can face that thing you call a husband. I bet he was abusive prior to this. This is not what spurred his actions. He was a cheat and an abuser. I pray God helps you but you have to be smart and sharp. No dey do, I am praying for my husband inside that your house o. You will not make it alive. He is not a rational being.
ReplyDeleteD tins women go tru ds days ehn, ds marriage is not even up to a year 4 Christ sake. This is BS, ur husband does not love u dear
ReplyDeleteEnd the marriage before he does that, the marriage isn't worth it. Hw can ur mother's stupidity affects ur home?
ReplyDeleteFor this lady to seek admonition on a blog her mind is heavy like her tommy presently,I think she is a good wife never had mind to cheat but the husband might push her to,she is ashamed of her mum already may God intervenes and makes your hubby more logical
ReplyDeleteYour husband is using that as an escuse to torment and cheat on you! Believe me your husband is a liar and a cheat,its really not his business if he caught ur momma cheating tho. I think u should call your mom and talk to her,sort things out before it gets outta hand
ReplyDeleteHmmm....this is a sad. But I try to picture myself in the scenario. If I were u, I would talk to my mum and have her confess her sin to her hubby/my Dad...reason is cos it is against him(ur Dad) and God that ur mum has committed this sin. Your Dad on the other hand has to forgive your Mum sharply, though its hard but it has to be done...for your own sake and your babies'. As for your husband that has turned to a monster overnight...that is his real colour. I mean....he caught ur Mum cheating so is that the ticket for him to fling affairs in ur face,do yanga with it, beat you up and insult ur family on top? Am sure his Father cheats on his Mum too and vice versa...just cos he never catch dem. I will not even wait to give birth to my babies in his house talk more of him telling me my mother cannot come for Omugwo. My dear....protect urself and u need ur family to stay strong. He needs to learn to respect ur family irrespective of whatever. Every family have their dark secrets o. U don't need to take this from your husband. I kinda like Tony's suggestion. Tell him the pregnancy is not his but after u move out o where u know there are people to protect him from beating. After sumtimes he will calm down and pick up his senses where he left it. Mscheww.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, hold yr head high, tell him he is not any better seeing his reaction to the issue. His immaturity is so evident. Keep holding on cus u r responsible for your joy and no one shld take ur peace and joy that God has given u. He is only doing himself harm and will realise it sooner or later. And u, just fold ur arms and see God fight ur battles. He will soon come begging. Talking from experience. Lol.
ReplyDeleteHmmm! My heart bleeds for you dear. Your man is simply making a mountain out of a mole hill. I don't think he is alrite. He has philandering tendencies in him before. He is only using ur mum's infidelity as an excuse. He needs somebody to talk some sense into his soapy brain. Why take panadol for anoda person's headache? I only hope you too have not been caught in a suspicious situation one time or the oda before cos its difficult listening to one side of a story nowadays. People need to talk to him. Go and tell his father.
ReplyDeleteEwww! You married someone else's man, sorry. If you like, don't start talking back to him and calling him worse names. Better still, why wait till you give birth before leaving his life like he said? U dey fuck up abeg.
ReplyDeleteBarely a year,your husband is a heartless creature, imagine emotionally and psychologically abusing you in your condition, chei women Don suffer, tomorrow if she comes across a gentleman who treats her good and she cheats,this same man would play the victim.my dear the lord is your strength, i think you should confide in your brothers,you need peace of mind.
ReplyDeleteI'm speechless really. I dnt knw where to start talkin frm. All I can say is: some men tho!
ReplyDeleteMake a head start on ur xmas shoppin list. Order ur trendy wears(ladies) from 299F808D. Thanks
So sorry to tell you this but your husband isn't going to stop tormenting and degrading you. He is a wicked man who has been looking for a way to control you and this is it. He will try to make you feel like a cheap whore and that he is doing you a favour by being married to you. Try to retain your self esteem if not he has succeeded. Pray to God to intervene if you love him otherwise count your loss and move on either emotionally ( and remain in his house) or physically (and escape his wicked grip).
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMy dear, your husband is a very selfish and wicked man. He has self esteem issues and he is taking it out on you! How does your mums lifestyle reflect you? He wants you to feel that he is better than you and he is doing you a favour by being married to you. Try to hold onto your self esteem and let him know you are better and more matured than him and his words have no effect on you. If you still love him then go to God in prayers, otherwise count your losses and move on ( either emotionally by making your kids the center of your world or physically by leaving). Your choice......
ReplyDeleteSame thought with you comment #33.
ReplyDeleteHe is so immature about it and has violent tendency in him!
Is he without sin himself? If it was his FIL he caught, would he tell his wife, or wave it aside as "men stuff?"
@Blog visitor, let your mother know what you are going through.
Hmmmm. All I am saying is dem never born dat man that will treat me like this & I will sit & be crying for him. Impossicant! I don't care my mom did or ddnt do or was alleged to have done. Makes no fucking business. U disrespect our marriage like this, am out.
ReplyDeleteChop knuckle my nicca... I say this all the time.. A Man will be treating me like shit, and I will just sit down and be crying? After all my education and exposure? "Is he Mad"? Asshole would spend long nights in cold cells, after I axe an arm off. Even if they say Love is blind, abeg abeg no be where my body that I worship so much is concerned o!! Hian!!
ReplyDelete